


Eye of Eleos

by pfeifferpack



Category: Buffy the Vampire Slayer (TV)
Genre: Multi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-01
Updated: 2020-04-02
Packaged: 2020-04-05 18:25:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 63
Words: 218,601
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19045924
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/pfeifferpack/pseuds/pfeifferpack
Summary: “Of course it was Willow. To really cause mayhem takes Willow’s special brand of magic."When Cookies don’t appease everyone who was impacted by Willow’s “Will Be Done” spell she looks to find a way to fix it with results that she might not expect but we all should.This goes Historical back to Williams childhood, pre-series, and series compatible through Something Blue until eventually ending AU. It includes canon from BtVS, Angel, some Comics and official novels here and there with notations when used, same with bits of dialogue.  Also includes links to additional information for RL information for anyone interested that will be in the endnotes for impacted chapters.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Story was written for the Elysian Fields 12 Years 12 Seasons Challenge. Prompt number 1, Banner 5 This is a LONG Wip that updates weekly on Elysion Fields but I will also be updating here as new chapters post there. As of May 31, 2019 posting there are already 31 chapters and I will be posting them here today with weekly updates to follow. 
> 
> I've done some storyboarding art for some chapters that will appear in later chapters but the main story banner was created by Nmcil and was the inspiration for the story.

[](https://imgur.com/XMer4zb)

Chapter 1

 

“So this statue is supposed to channel ... who?” Willow fingered the delicate olive wood idol of a woman in a blue veil with a raven perched on her shoulder. There was what looked like a miniature cauldron at the base that had clearly been used at one time for offerings of incense. The insides were blackened from a lot of use in ages past. ‘Good thing they used metal for that part of the statue,’ she thought. ‘Fire pretty, incense nice but wood holder...bad.’ The object appeared to be something once used in pagan religious rituals and it had called to Willow as she had browsed the Magic store. 

 

“Eleos. That’s really all I have on that particular item.” The latest magic store owner looked a bit sheepish at his lack of information for the potential buyer. “I did look it up online. Some really ancient goddess. Supposed to be the personification of mercy, clemency, and compassion. Not real well known.”

 

Willow nodded, her interest in the item increasing. Nothing potentially bad with any of that! ‘I mean, doesn’t everyone deserve mercy and compassion?’ Cookies held a powerful magic of their own but not powerful enough to mend all fences evidently.

 

The side-eye looks from Buffy, Giles and Xander made it clear that while Willow was forgiven, her last ‘oopsie’ was far from forgotten.

 

Anya was the only one to actually say anything but Willow knew they were all thinking it. ‘Willow and magic are like a bad science project. Put the ingredients together and everything went boom.’

 

Willow was dejected. She knew magic was her true calling, a gift. She was a natural talent, it all just flowed from her. She just needed to be able to concentrate more. Make sure her real demands were worded right. Have more confidence.

 

“I won’t have that confidence that I need if my best friends don’t trust me,” she whispered as she ran a finger over the idol in her hands.

 

Giles had even refused to loan her his ‘Grimoire of St. Mechthild of Magdeburg’. His facial expression of horror making it clear that he feared what Willow might do if she tried anything she found in the text written by the old mystic. ‘As if I’d make a mistake again!’ She felt her indignation rise at the thought. After all, she had been distracted during that ‘Will Be Done’ spell by her grief over Oz leaving her so cruelly. She was much more focused now.

 

“So why is it called the ‘Eye of Eleos? I get the Eleos part but why the eye?”

 

The idol was lovely but not as finely detailed as many ancient pieces were.

 

“Your guess is as good as mine. I picked this up at a demon flea market.” The shopkeeper glanced around the shop uneasily as if there might be hidden demons spying on his oral Yelp review. “You have to be careful with what you pick up there. First of all … fleas? Sometimes literal. Second, not a lot of documentation for the real stuff. Not like most demons bother with certificates of authenticity or old bills of sales if you know what I mean,” he winked conspiratorily.

 

“Um… yeah… I guess not.” Willow looked at the idol with a dubious eye as the store owner saw his chance of a sure sale lessening.

 

“Still, I know my stuff.” The shopkeeper cum wizard sought to reassure her. Didn’t want to scare off a possible repeat customer after all. “This is the real deal. I can tell the fakes from the genuine. Magical power,” he whispered. “This little lady emits plenty.”

 

He reached for Willow’s left hand and placed it on the image of the goddess. “Feel it?”

 

Willow tried to tune in her senses. She did feel a prickle of something unnatural coming from the olive wood figure. “Kind of like ants,” she shivered slightly.

 

The shopkeeper laughed. “Guess you could describe it that way. Strong tingles! That, my young magic novice is the feel of ancient power.”

 

“I’m not a novice,” Willow replied indignantly. Honestly! Why did everyone seem to downplay her power and skill? ‘Make one little, teeny, boo-boo and everyone starts to doubt.’

 

“Okay, I’m sold” She placed the idol with her other purchases on the counter.

 

“That’ll be twelve eighty plus tax.”

 

***

 

Willow headed for the dorm statue in hand. She’d opted for Sandlewood incense because it was conducive to compassion and openness and that’s what she was going for with what she had planned. She had selected the powdered form of the scent to burn in the thurible as a humble offering to the previously unfamiliar goddess.

 

“Just because there’s no instructions or fancy-schmancy Watchers book to go with this doesn’t mean I can’t figure it out. No one taught me the magic I’ve already mastered. No one taught me how to be a good enough computer hacker that Bill Gates tried to recruit me while I was still in high school either! This should be a piece of cake.”

 

She thought about her purpose, her desires and decided all she really needed was to come up with good rhymey words for the incantation, put in the proper incense, appeal to the goddess and she was as good as forgiven!

 

***

 

Willow lit the incense and gazed at the serene countenance of the goddess. “I just want them to get what it’s like in someone else's shoes,” She sighed.

 

The incense drew up in a long, thin, aromatic smoke pillar reaching heavenward as the olive wood goddess briefly took on a light silver and green glow. Willow caught up in her thoughts of reconciliation didn’t notice.

 

She began to intone the words she had finally settled upon:

 

Devine Eleos, goddess of mercy, empathy, and grace

 

Open eyes and hearts now closed of those judging others actions without learning their pain.

 

Let understanding flow as they see what others face

 

Let forgiveness reign and trust regain.

 

Let them not just hear but see

 

And as I will, so mote it be.

 

Willow waited for some sign that her ‘written on the fly’ spell had worked and for her prayer to be honored. An hour later she still waited until finally, the incense ash grew cold. “Phooey! Knows his stuff my patootie.” She frowned and bit back her disappointment. “Who’s the novice now ‘Mr. I own a magic shop but can’t even float a pencil'!”

 

She packed up the obvious phony idol and headed over to Giles’ apartment to sneak a peek at his library again. Maybe there’d be something real there that she could use to get what she craved.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

 

Spike hadn’t laughed this hard since before the mob of ‘Dracula’ extras in Prague had decided to go all pitchforks and torches on him and his Dark Dove.

 

“No, really, Slayer, take your time,” he downright giggled. “Looks like a paintball factory blew up all over you. Haven’t been this entertained in an age.” He actually had the nerve to snort with laughter.

 

Buffy wanted nothing more than to give the annoying Vampire chained in Giles’ tub the beat down he was so asking for! If her Watcher had a second bathroom she would have let the bloodsucker rot. After ‘painting’ his pasty ass black and blue that is.

 

“Shut up Spike,” she demanded. “When I get these chains off you can wait, nicely, for me to get this demon goo off of me like the impotent former big-bad you are. You can sit in the living room and watch TV or read a book or something and you WILL behave.” She scolded.

 

“What’s the matter Slayer,” Spike was in full snark mode. “College showers not good enough for a stuck up bitch like you?” He was sick and tired of all the fun at Spike’s expense the Slayer and her gang of supposedly good guys were having because he’d been defanged. He’d show them all just how NOT impotent he was, just as soon as he got the hardware out of his noggin’.

 

Buffy rolled her eyes at the lame insult from her former nemesis. “The dorm showers are just fine. I just don’t want to walk across Sunnydale, dodging commandos while coated in multi-colored demon goo.” She looked down at her ruined clothes and shuddered. “Who knew Pirreng demons exploded in neon? You’d think Giles would have warned me.”

 

“If you’d listened to what I tried to tell you, or even Demon-Girl, you might have known. But NO, not the high and mighty Slayer and her intrepid band of do-gooders! Not give a helpful demon the time of day much less a listen.”

 

“Helpful?!” Buffy huffed in amazement. Here they had opened up their homes, okay Giles’ apartment, to the handicapped vampire and he had the nerve to say they hadn’t given him the time of day!

 

“The day you’re helpful will be the day an apocalypse actually kills me.”

 

Spike glared at her. “Love to help with that,” he growled as the last manacle fell from his now free body. He stood and stretched his cramped muscles before getting out of the tub.

 

Buffy did her best not to look at the strip of skin showing between the end of his tee-shirt and the top of his jeans. From the darker trail of hairs pointing to places Buffy truly didn’t want to even think about, she knew he was anything but a natural blond. Not even non-radioactive blond. ‘Light brown at best,’ she mused before shaking her inner slut briskly and telling her to hit the road. She REALLY needed to find a new boyfriend before she started to do more than drool over the hot vampire in the tub. ‘Not that Spike is hot,’ she lied to herself. She ignored the small voice of her exiled inner slut who protested, ‘Yeah, right. Like you haven’t had more than one dream of exploring what’s under that duster.’

 

“You have bath time fun with the Watcher often, Slayer?” Spike taunted spoiling the mood. “Cause my opinion of the stuffy berk just went up a notch if he’s been gettin’ his freak on with a hot piece of fluff like you.”

 

Buffy’s mouth dropped open in shock. “What?” she sputtered. She wasn’t sure what she was really most shocked about. Spike’s crude insinuation about… EWWWWW, not going there… ever! Or that he had just said he thinks of her as hot.

 

Spike backed out of the bathroom quickly as he caught the look in Buffy’s eye and before the Slayer could regain her wits and then knock his right out of him. ‘Had to open your mouth didn’t you?’ he chastised himself. He replayed his less than wise crack then nearly choked. ‘Had to slip and let on that she’s hot enough to tempt a monk,’ he bit his lip and gave Buffy a sloe-eyed look. Spike was no monk, just a temporary involuntary celibate.

 

Now he was going to be just a wall away from a wet, naked Slayer with no safe place to have a decent wank to deal with the lust that that thought created.

 

“Out, Spike,” Buffy practically shouted. “Just get out of this bathroom while you’re not a pile of dust clogging Giles’ grout and don’t do anything obnoxious while I’m in here.”

 

“Like I’d want to stay,” he lied and gave her a look better suited on the face of a twelve-year-old.

 

“OUT!”

 

***

 

Spike was bored. Naturally, the Watcher hadn’t sprung for even Basic Cable so all there was on the telly was chat shows and bloody news programs.

 

Since the sodding spell the red witch had done all Spike had going through his head as he sat in his white porcelain prison was how Buffy had felt on his lap and tasted on his lips. Now she was naked in his bed and unfortunately, it was the bloody shower and she was merely getting clean.

 

He needed to do something truly evil. Terrible time to be limited in his choices. He supposed he could simply burn the sodding apartment to the ground but then he’d have no shelter from the sadists who had already had far too much fun playing with Spike’s body. Besides, he had no real desire to see the Slayer burn. Shower, yes. Burn… not so much at least not literally.

 

Spike began to actually look at Giles’ library full of moth-eaten manuscripts and books older than even he was. “Figures the numpty would have them all proper and organized like.” That gave him a brilliant idea for some subtle evil.

 

He began to re-organize the library one book at a time. By the time he finished the Knob wouldn’t be able to find his own arse in a lit room.

 

Hearing that Buffy was still running through all the hot water available to the flat, Spike decided to widen his horizons to include more than the library. He smiled wickedly and headed for the small kitchen.

 

“Wonder how long it’ll take the wanker to check before using his condiments?” He really hoped he wouldn’t be chained in the tub when Giles had his next cuppa.

 

He toyed with the idea of defiling the PG Tips but his innate British reverence for real tea stopped him in his tracks.

 

“Watcher’s stuff’s as borin’ as he is,” Spike complained. He looked around to see what other mischief he might get up to. His choices seemed limited.

 

Back to the living room to scout other opportunities while the Slayer was still covered with suds. Spike gulped at the mental image that thought brought and began to search with a new sense of desperation.

 

He spotted the small collection of mystical objects that weren’t locked up in Ruperts little-chest-of-horrors. Clearly, they were neither valuable nor anything of great power or they wouldn’t be out for the general public to fondle. Still, the berk had bothered to collect them.

 

He “accidentally” knocked over a small bag filled with Runes that spilled everywhere. Spike kicked several under various pieces of furniture with glee.

 

A small, cheap and fairly cheesy “crystal ball” was the next casualty. It made a delightfully satisfying crunching sound as it hit the tile floor and cracked.

 

“So it’s true,” Spike smirked, “idle minds really are the devil’s playground.”

 

He reached for another trinket just as the newly-clean Slayer rounded the corner and caught sight of his reign of “evil”. “What the hell do you think you are doing?”

 

“Amusin’ myself, just like you suggested.” Spike had the nerve to smirk at her as he reached for a statue on the shelf that was, so far, unmolested.

 

“I said watch TV not destroy Giles’ do-dads.” Buffy looked at the scattered runes and broken crystal in dismay. Now the annoying vampire had the pretty statue that Willow had given to Giles just yesterday.

 

“Maybe if the tightwad would spring for decent channels his toys wouldn’t get played with,” Spike suggested as he picked up the olive wood goddess.

 

“PUT THAT DOWN,” Buffy ordered.

 

“Make me,” Spike challenged.

 

Buffy made a grab for the statue as Spike played a game of ‘keep-away’ with it. Buffy put on her most determined face and lunged, finally grabbing Spike’s arm pulling it and the statue he held close enough to latch on to it.

 

From their standpoint, everything froze including both Spike and Buffy.

 

To any other eyes, the pair and the now glowing statue were encased in a silver and green bubble that looked like a large soap bubble but was impenetrable.

 

Frozen in time as if they were also a statue, Buffy grasped the head of the idol while Spike, also locked in their unending tug-of-war was holding the legs of the idol tightly. Both were staring daggers at one another. Neither able to move or speak.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3 

 

Giles sighed as only a severely put-upon Watcher could and steeled himself to enter his own flat. Nothing in his training had ever prepared him for sharing his living quarters with a hyperactive, annoying member of the undead. They trained him in the many ways to turn such creatures into so much dust but not how to play a live action version of ‘The Odd Couple’.

 

He knew that as soon as he entered his once-sacred sanctum the litany of complaints would begin. “Bloody Pillock!” Giles shifted the bag filled with a disgusting amount of pigs blood and reached for the handle. He was feeling positively violated with the change in his living circumstances!

 

With a deep sigh, he turned the knob and tried to run complex mathematical calculations in his mind to block the unending whining and demands that he knew would soon assail him.

 

He felt the stones before stumbling on them. “What the…,” he peered down at runes that should by all logic be safely housed in their bag on the shelf across the room and not scattered over his foyer tile. Maybe one of the unruly teens that he seemed to have accumulated like lint on a jumper was responsible. He quickly ruled out Willow. At least she respected mystical paraphernalia.

 

He put the bag with the blood on the small table along with his keys and bent to examine the latest disruption to his ordered life more closely.

 

Glancing up he saw the current bane of his existence, rather obviously not properly secured in his bathroom but standing as bold as day in his living room! “Spike!” he spat out. Naturally, the culprit who violated his property had to be the buggering vampire sharing quarters. “Would you care to explain just why you are running tame in my flat and making free with my belongings,” he demanded.

 

The miserable Bugger was keeping silent for once. “If you think your current handicap will prevent me from throwing your useless self out to fend for yourself you can think again.” Giles stood and, his anger building headed across the room to confront Spike.

 

He had actually taken three full steps before he noticed that Spike was not alone. “Buffy?”

 

It was an indicator of just how frustrated the entire situation with Spike had made him that he didn’t snap immediately to the oddness of the scene. Giles blinked and cautiously moved closer to the tableau before him. He quickly looked around the room to be certain there were no other occupants waiting to leap out and further confound him.

 

There was his Slayer standing as if frozen in what appeared to be a tug of war against Spike with the idol that Willow had recently gifted him as the rope stand-in. The irritating vampire was equally frozen in place. Surrounding the two was a shimmering spherelike barrier. It was iridescent, primarily silver and green in color. He gingerly touched it with a cautious finger and found its consistency rather like rubber. It was firm but not rigid and it seemed to be completely surrounding the pair. Neither seemed aware of his presence and they were as motionless as if carved from stone.

 

There was a trace of energy that Giles identified as magical in essence. Either someone had performed some sort of spell that resulted in this situation or, possibly, the object they had been wrestling with had greater power than he had suspected when giving it a cursory look when Willow had presented it to him.

 

Rupert looked to his precious books hoping the answer would lie there and that he could quickly end this latest assault to his well-ordered life. Books were reliable. They could always be counted on to hold answers if one simply looked in the proper place.

 

Someone had made a dog’s dinner of his library! Really, how was one supposed to solve a predicament such as this with all of one's resources missing or in a jumble? ‘Oh suck it up and stop acting like a fusty old man,’ his inner Ripper scolded. ‘Not going to help your Slayer if you persist in acting like the elderly Swot that Spike is always accusing you of being. Time enough to worry over housekeeping and punishment for vandals later.’

 

“Right then.” Giles drew himself up to full height and tried to remember just what it was that Willow had told him about the rather lovely idol she had given to him. The very item now connecting Buffy with the bain of their existence in what was obviously a mystically induced paralysis. “First assume the obvious.”

 

With no one else present to blame, Giles quickly decided that either the object itself had caused this disaster or that the vampire had discovered a way to create mischief in spite of his current handicap only to have it fail spectacularly entrapping himself in the process. “Serve him right, the bloody Plonker.” If Buffy weren’t also trapped within the sphere with him Giles would cheerfully let the vampire remain in stasis until the final apocalypse came to devour the whole of the earth. There was no way, however, that he would abandon Buffy to that same fate.

 

He tried to gather his thoughts as quickly as possible. “Right then, old man, get it together.”

 

First, he needed resources. He had a fairly comprehensive library even if it was currently scattered about his living room. Nothing appeared to have been actually destroyed. It might take a bit longer to sort than if his property had been respected but the information was still there. It merely begged for patience and diligence on his part to discover.

 

“Good Lord,” he knelt to begin gathering his precious tomes. “Where to begin?”

 

***

“Holy moley!” Even without the tell-tale expression Giles would have known his home had been invaded by Xander and likely his plus-one without looking. The wafting aroma of pizza preceded the pair. 

 

Xander dropped the two boxes and made a rush towards the two frozen figures clearly intent on pulling Spike away from Buffy. Under other circumstances watching the boy bounce off the sphere would have been quite amusing. “What the…?”

 

Giles closed his eyes in exasperation. ‘Really, if these children had the good manners to knock first I could have prepared him for what he was going to see.’ “Yes, Xander, this is the very reason I rang you up. I need as many sets of eyes as possible to try to help research this situation.”

 

Anya was circling the pair of silent adversaries encased in the bubble. “It seems simple to me,” she began but neither Xander nor Giles paid any attention to anything she might have to tell them. “They’re in the eye.”

 

“Yes, yes,” Giles snapped in irritation. “That’s rather obvious isn’t it? Now help me research to find out how and why. We can determine the who later.”

 

“Eleos is…” Anya tried again.

 

“That’s it!” Giles began to fumble with the book he held open in his lap. “That’s the name Willow said was attached to that statue. Well done, Anya.”

 

Anya looked at the Watcher as if he were mentally lacking. “Thank you. Now if you’ll…”

 

Once more she was cut off, this time by Xander. “How do you spell that?”

 

“E-l-e-o-s I believe,” Giles replied, “or it could be i-o-s, I’m not certain.”

 

Anya shrugged then made herself busy picking up the pizza boxes and putting them on the dining table before diving in and claiming a slice. If no one wanted to listen to her she would use her mouth to feed her hunger and let them flounder as they always did.

 

‘This will certainly be interesting,’ she decided. ‘No telling how this will all turn out considering it’s Buffy and Spike. Things could go either way.’ She shrugged again and took another bite. Well, the boys might as well fill their time with needless research because they would have plenty of time to fill.

 

Why Giles hadn’t immediately called Willow made no sense to Anya. Willow gave him that idol and Anya would bet a fairly large sum of money had tried to use it too. Just like the last time the girl had dabbled with forces beyond her she’d screwed the pooch. At least this time there were no demon hoards chasing them all over Sunnydale!

 

‘Ah, speak of the devil,’ she raised a brow as Willow entered the scene. ‘This should be good.’

 

Anya didn’t dislike the redheaded old friend of Xander but she knew full well that Willow disliked her intensely. It wouldn’t disturb Anya one bit to see the snippy girl get a good dressing-down by Buffy’s Watcher. She’d pop popcorn if she wasn’t already enjoying her third slice of cheesy goodness.

 

“Oh, goddess!” Willow looked from the trapped couple to the two men going through Giles’ reference books and back again. “How… what… when?”

 

“Three excellent questions Wills. Pull up a book and help us answer them.”

 

Willow had a sinking feeling she had the answer right in her own head but there was no reason to jump to conclusions. Conclusions that would only make everybody mad and distrust her even further. ‘Nope! No reason to think this is my doing just because that’s my statue. Lots of things could explain this. My spell didn’t even work and it wasn’t a ‘turn Buffy into a mannequin’ spell. No way was this her fault so there was no reason to volunteer anything about any spells that maybe weren’t exactly successful.’

 

She grabbed a book and joined the pair on the sofa as Anya huffed out an exasperated, “pfft.” All of them were so comically dense! They talked all the time but rarely about what was needed and never listened when anyone tried to say something useful or important. Honestly, she didn’t know how they were as successful as they had been all these years.

 

*** 

“Willow! Buffy shook her head. “Of course it was Willow. To really cause mayhem takes Willow’s special brand of magic.” There had been more than a few incidents since her beloved friend had taken up magic as her own ‘super-power’. Willow had come a long way from floating pencils! But this! This took the cake. “The cake, the ice-cream, party hats and ‘My Little Pony’ party favors.”

 

Buffy didn’t know how she just knew it was Willow at the root of this latest fiasco but she did. The last time Willow’s magic had taken over her life she spent hours cooing to Spike while sitting on his lap and planning a wedding.

 

Actually, that mess actually had some serious up-sides although Buffy would never admit it. ‘Spike lips. Lips of Spike,’ she remembered and might have even drooled a bit. The only reason she was still even a teenie bit annoyed with her bestie over that bungled spell was that those lips and … other parts… still showed up front and center in Buffy’s dreams and at times even waking fantasies. ‘As if I’m not sexually frustrated enough on my own,’ she pouted. ‘Had to get a taste of yummy, hot vampire to make me want more.’ She had to be the world’s worst Slayer in the history of Slayerdom.

 

Buffy wasn’t sure just what was going on. She seemed to be somewhere that was not Giles’ apartment but just where she hadn’t a clue. Wherever it was it was night-time and it didn’t look like any place in Sunnydale that she was familiar with. One minute she was trying to get that statue thing out of Spike’s grabby paws before he could do any more damage and the next she was here, wherever here is and Spike was nowhere to be seen.

 

‘Huh,’ she mused, ‘got a feeling I’m not anywhere near Kansas, Toto.’ She looked around in bemused confusion. Buffy tried to remember if there was one of those fake old-fashioned villages like some amusement parks had, or that village they built by the Queen Mary down in Long Beach that her mom and dad had taken her to years ago, anywhere near Sunnydale. ‘Maybe that’s where I am, the Queen Mary.’ A quick glance didn’t reveal a large luxury liner in permanent dock, however.

 

“Maybe this time Willow figured I needed a vacation.” Buffy was game. A quick trip getting away from her duties for a few hours would be okie dokie. Would be nice to know where she was though so she could tell Giles where to pick her up.

 

A chubby guy in stuffier clothes then even Giles wore and a Lincoln hat was walking her way. She’d ask the actor just what theme-park she’d landed in and then find a pay-phone. “Hey, mister. Um…,” how to ask without sounding like she just escaped from a hospital? “What’s the official name of this park? I need to call my W… uh… dad to come pick me up and don’t want him going to the wrong tourist trap.”

 

The man walked on as if she wasn’t even there! ‘Rude much!,’ she huffed. Maybe she’d insulted him by calling his place of employment a tourist trap. Maybe he was one of those weird people who liked to play dress up and this is his dream job. She’d try again only nicer. “Wait!” He didn’t stop so Buffy gave chase.

 

The man continued to totally ignore her. ‘Maybe they’re like Donald Duck and the gang at Disney and they aren’t supposed to break character,’ she reasoned.

 

While she was puzzling over how to get the answers she needed and directions to a phone she was nearly run over by another dude on a horse. ‘WAIT! Not run over, run THROUGH.’ The horse and rider had literally gone right through her as if she wasn’t even there. “Crap!”


	4. Chapter 4

[](https://imgur.com/FwCQYON)

Chapter 4

 

“Where the hell am I,” Buffy looked around with growing alarm. She had been wandering around the place she had assumed was a theme park only to finally have to admit her initial assessment was more than likely correct. Number one, she wasn’t anywhere near Kansas, and number two she was wherever, more likely whenever, thanks to Willow and her statue of doom.

 

Worse than all the uncertainty was the fact that none of the people and animals she had encountered seemed to see or hear her. She was a ghost only without dying. “At least I hope I’m not dead ‘cause heaven...not something from Charles Dickens or the Christmas cards Aunt Lolly sent every year. Where are the Angels and harps? No St. Peter with his naughty and nice scroll.”

 

The place didn’t look like hell either. Buffy might have found parts of it charming. Parts because for all the Curvier-Ivy Christmas card scenes, the smell was terrible. “Okay, lots of horses so lots of horse poop. I get it. I wish this ghosty body didn’t come complete with smell-o-rama.” The air was pretty thick with gunk too. “Too bad these people don’t know how to control air pollution!”

 

Based on the accents she guessed she was in England. Going by the Ebenezer Scrooge outfits she was pretty sure she might run into William Shakespeare before long. Buffy wished she had paid more attention in history class but maybe knowing for certain would only make it more depressing.

 

“At least I can understand what they’re saying. Mostly,” for once she was glad she had to deal with a lot of stuffy Watchers over the years because it helped her figure out the trickier lingo.

 

“Why would Willow send me here?” Buffy sat down on a door stoop that was fairly clean in this part of town. She had originally found herself along a smelly river with a lot of ships and warehouses. Why she had no idea. Maybe she should have stayed there and tried to figure it out. Instead, she had followed the chubby guy she had seen first when she got there and now she was in a kind of pretty neighborhood.

 

It was majorly wigsome that she was able to keep up with him especially when he got into a carriage and left the area. It was as if her wanting to not lose track of the guy kept her tied to him. One minute he was calling out to the driver and getting in and the next she was sitting across from him, still unseen by her traveling companion. “Hum, must have been a taxi. I didn’t know they had taxies in medieval days.”

 

The man had gone into one of the pretty houses across from where Buffy now sat just a few minutes before. She wasn’t sure how she could get anyone to let her in even if she would be at a loss to explain who she was and what she wanted.

 

Suddenly an idea took root and Buffy brightened a bit. “If I’m all ghostly, maybe I can just walk through the wall or the door or something!”

 

Turned out rooted ideas were of the good and Buffy found herself in a pretty foyer of the house. No one was around so she took the chance that her case of invisibleness would hold and began to look around. Maybe something would make some sense if she snooped a bit.

 

***

“Really, Henry, you’ve been home from the war for nearly five years now. Don’t you think it time for you to take back the reins at the firm?” Chubby was talking to a much thinner man with a mustache. They were in a library of some kind and both held glasses of some kind of alcohol.

 

Chubby was still going on. “I realize you were quite ill following the engagement in Varna but you seem quite recovered now. Good God, man the entire war has been ended for the past four years!”

 

The thinner man looked a bit haunted. Whatever war they were talking about had clearly not been easy on him. ‘Maybe he has that PTDS like the homeless Vietnam Vets on the corner in LA have?’ Buffy felt a rush of sympathy. It wasn’t easy being a warrior. No one fully got the toll it took to always be in battle or battle-ready anyway.

 

“The cholera was the least of it George and you know it. Seeing my men laid low, that was the worst. Why I was spared I’ll never know,” his hand trembled slightly as he poured another drink for Chubby.

 

“For Anne and the children, of course,” said Chubby only to receive a snort in reply.

 

“Yes and what of all their families?”

 

Buffy got that too. All the lives she couldn’t save. It weighed on her when she let herself think about it.

 

“My sister is made of stern stuff but she needs you, Henry.”

“Are you suggesting that I am neglecting my family?”

 

George as Chubby turned out to be named drew up looking quite affronted. “Certainly not! You are a fine husband and father. Couldn’t have picked better for my sister if she’d been inclined to want my opinion on the subject.”

 

Henry poured another drink for himself and took a seat across from his guest and evidently brother-in-law.

 

“Quite,” he let George off the hook. “So what, precisely, is your complaint then George? I looked over the ledgers and it seems to all be in order. The ships have been on time and all merchandise appears to have arrived with no losses. Our profits are up and warehouses full are they not?”

 

“Yes. Everything has been running as it should but, Henry, it’s been running without it’s Captain.”

 

“You’ve done an admirable job.”

 

“That’s the point. It is just my job. It is your company,” George said pointedly.

 

Henry sighed and closed his eyes. “I’m just so very tired, George. Haven’t the stamina I had before the war and the sickness don’t you know. I’ve tried to keep Anne from seeing how very weary I am all the time. Fortunately, William is a quiet boy and quite happy with his books and interests. Alma adores her Governess and is no bother either. I just don’t think I can step back in as yet.”

 

George looked at his brother-in-law with concern. “I had no idea you were ailing. Perhaps you should send for William Gull. I know he mostly lectures lately but Guy’s hospital isn’t that far and he does owe me a favor from back in University. I’m sure he’d see you. He’s a right hand at diagnoses. I’m sure he’d set you right in no time.”

 

“Perhaps, but I’d prefer to go to him rather than alarm Anne. She worries so ever since I went off like some hair-brained lad to fight the bloody Russians.”

 

“Came too close to losing you,” George nodded.

 

There was a knock on the door that interrupted the conversation. ‘Good,’ Buffy felt like kissing the intruder. It wasn’t that she wasn’t interested but she wasn’t interested. Well, she WAS interested in finding out who these people were and figuring out just why she’d followed George to the war veteran’s house listening to them argue over business issues and icky diseases.

 

An attractive blonde woman wearing a Gone With The Wind dress floated through the door. “George! I had no idea you were joining us until Bridie let me know you were ensconced with my husband,” she scolded mildly. “Business, I suppose. Well, at least it will keep it away from table-talk. You are staying aren’t you?”

 

Chubby looked like he didn’t turn down many meals when offered brightened up considerably. “Be delighted!”

 

Henry chuckled and kissed his wife on the cheek. “So sorry my love. Have we held up dinner?”

 

“No, I just finished hearing Williams sums and tucking Alma in bed.”

 

George tutted. “Isn’t it about time for William to have a proper tutor. If you want to secure his place in Eton once he reaches thirteen you should be seeing him well prepared to compete. There are only five years before that becomes a reality.”

 

Anne looked a bit peeved. Evidently, Uncle George had been pretty opinionated while helping out while Henry was off to war, Buffy thought. It seemed he needed to break that habit and let them run their own household! ‘Nothing like pushy family.’

 

“Miss Culver is a fine instructor, George. We can only afford one teacher and she is dearly loved by both of my children.” Anne had had this argument with her brother more than once over the years that Henry was gone. If she had listened to him her sweet William would have been shuttled out to the country to stay at some rectory and study with his cousins. Anne couldn’t bear the idea of sending her only son off until she absolutely had too. He was far too timid and tender to be thrust into rough company like that!

 

“Just telling Henry the profit line looks excellent. Wouldn’t be too much to stretch your budget a bit and get the boy out of London and into a proper atmosphere. He needs to make friends before he enters Eton or he’ll be a fish out of water.”

 

Henry had heard variations on all the conversations of this evening more than once. He really was weary and such nitpicking only worsened it. “I believe my wife has things well in hand, George, but thank you for your concern.”

 

George, evidently, knew when to give up. He stood and, one more looking like a man being offered a treat walked to the door. “I say, has Abernathy made pudding this time?”

 

Anne chuckled at her brother and his far too avid interest in the offerings of her kitchen. “I believe she has indeed. Perhaps we should adjourn to the dining room and sample her efforts.”

 

“Well that wasn’t useful,” Buffy pouted. “I hope ghosts don’t get hungry because it looks like I’m going to watch a bunch of strangers eat without me.”

 

***

The boy was slight in build but healthy. His blond hair had a tendency to curl in a charming way. His slightly younger sister was a cutie even if she wore a hairbow big enough to pass for Minnie Mouse ears.

 

After dinner, Buffy had followed Henry and Anne upstairs to what must be the children’s rooms. George had cried off after eating more roast beef than Buffy had ever seen anyone consume in one sitting. No doubt he was heading to his own home to sleep the sleep of the over-fed.

 

“Father!” William looked at his sire in clear adoration pulling himself up trying to look as tall as possible. “Did mother tell you that I have finally conquered fractions?” The boy looked up at his father clearly seeking his approval. “I must say that mathematics is still not my favorite subject. It lacks poetry.” Seeking his father’s lack of facial expression the boy pressed on. “Not that I abhor it. I know that I must one day take my place at your side with the firm. I must know the subject quite thoroughly and I assure you that I will, Father.”

 

Henry smiled then and ruffled his son’s curls. “I am certain you will excel, William. You have a fine mind.”

 

The boy beamed in pleasure.

 

“Has Uncle George gone then?”

 

Anne smiled, “Yes, William and don’t fret, your father and I haven’t been persuaded to send you off to school. You will stay here with your family as you have all along. Time enough for you to go out into the world later.”

 

William looked relieved.

 

“Mother, Alma has a bit of a rash. I noticed it when I went to bid her good dreams. She didn’t want to forgo the picnic tomorrow and didn’t want you to know but she seemed poorly and I thought you should be told.”

 

Anne looked a bit alarmed. Any threat to her family put her into a bit of a tizzy. Over the past few years it seemed there was threat after threat to one or another of them too.

 

‘Bet she has measles,’ Buffy thought and remembered her cousin being quite sick with them when they were both little. ‘Poor kid!’

 

“Thank you for telling me, William. I’ll check on her right now.” Anne headed for the adjoining door that gave access to Alma’s sleeping chamber.

 

William sighed deeply, “She’s going to be furious with me for telling. No doubt I’ll need to watch my boots for something disgusting she’ll put in them for a while.”

Henry kept himself from laughing out loud at his son’s aggrieved expression and the reminder of his daughter’s impish character. “I’m sure she will understand, son.”

 

“You don’t know what a terror Alma can be, Father. I swear if she had gone with you to battle the war would have been over in a thrice.”

 

Henry did laugh then. “William I think you need to look that word up. Thrice means three times. You must always be certain you choose your words correctly to say just what you truly mean.”

 

William looked solemn, “I shall always try, Father. Words are important.”

 

Anne re-entered the room, a worried look on her face. “Henry! We need to send for the doctor. I believe Alma may be seriously ill.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N The Crimean war ran from 1853 - 1856. Many deaths from Cholera as well as battle wounds took a toll on the forces throughout the different armies. Williams little sister, Alma, was one of lots of little children given names that honored individuals in that war. I selected her name from a site that gave the most common names for children born in 1854.
> 
> “The impact of the Crimean war can be seen in many of the names this year... while Alma (there were lots of Almas! Boys and girls) and Sebastepol were notable battles. In this year there was also a baby actually named Crimea.”


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

 

Things seemed to swirl a bit in Buffy world. She felt a strange pulling sensation as everything around her went dark as if she had closed her eyes.

 

The next thing she knew she was standing outside in the rain in a churchyard. There was a small crowd gathered and she couldn’t see past them to know what was going on. ‘Great. I don’t go to church in my real life. Why does a ghost need to go and why not go inside where it’s not all wet and smelly?”

 

She heard soft sobbing and recognized the back of chubby George first. “Great. I guess George has dragged me somewhere else.” It seemed time had changed too because it wasn’t night any longer and Buffy couldn’t remember dozing off.

 

The group began to break up and Buffy finally could see she was in a small cemetery. ‘Should have known. Where else would I be?’

 

As people began to drift away in pairs or small numbers she saw Anne nearly collapsed in the arms of Henry standing beside a small, still open, grave. The poor woman looked ready for the grave herself.

 

Buffy overheard two women whispering, “This happens so often. The poor lamb. Smallpox is a horrid way to die, and so very young! Poor Anne. Nearly losing her husband and now having to bury her child.”

 

Buffy suddenly felt anything but quippy. ‘Poor Anne and Henry! William was right, his little sister really was sick,” she looked around to see if the young boy was nearby. “At least I think it was Alma that must have died. I guess it could have been William though.”

 

No, there he was off to one side near the hedgerow looking pale as death himself. Buffy felt drawn to the obviously grieving boy. He was all alone. His parents too wrapped up in their own grief to notice him off by himself. No one else did either.

 

William was crying silently and kicking at a lump of sod. “I should have spoken sooner. It’s all my fault. I should never have kept it a secret that long. Perhaps they could have kept her alive.”

 

Buffy wished with all her being that she had real arms not ghostly ones to hold the boy. It wasn’t right for him to blame himself. There was no way he could have known it was that serious. Besides, there wasn’t much a doctor could have done back in the dark ages, at least she didn’t think so.

 

“It’s not fair!” He looked at his grieving parents. “Father is already in poor health and mother is hanging on by a thread,” he sniffed and closed his eyes trying to stifle the physical signs of his own grief.

 

William looked to the raining skies, his chin held firm and anger replacing the tears. “What kind of God takes little girls not even seven years old?” he demanded. “How is this some grand, unknowable, divine purpose like the Vicar said?”

 

Buffy would like an answer to that herself. She’d seen far too many gravesites in her life starting with her favorite cousin Celia. She had to agree with William, death wasn’t fair or divine, grand or otherwise. It was just death.

 

‘Oh GOD! I hope little Alma wasn’t turned or anything and that’s why I’m here!’ The thought sickened her. She hated the times she had to dust vampires in children’s bodies. Luckily it didn’t happen often. ‘No, they have a Slayer of their own for things like that,’ she comforted herself.

 

She had no idea where this time’s Slayer was but it wasn’t rational to think that she was there and noncorporeal if it was all about dusting some poor, sweet, little girl!

 

William was kicking at the small mound of dirt his toe had dug up with tightly focused fury. ‘That’s right kid. Kick away. It might make you feel better.’

 

Uncle George had finally noticed the boy. Unfortunately, he seemed more interested in having him display good behavior than comforting his nephew. “That’s enough William Pratt! Your poor mother just buried your little sister and shouldn’t have to deal with you displaying such temper!”

 

Seemed like a proper reaction to Buffy but no one could have heard her if she had spoken up for the kid.

 

William looked over at his parents and lowered his head in shame. “My apologies, uncle. I’ll show more decorum, I promise. They need me to be strong and I know it.”

 

‘Wow, they sure want a kid to act way grown up back in the olden days!’ Buffy shook her head and gave thanks to whoever that she wasn’t born back whenever this was. She would totally suck at it.

 

Before Buffy could move to head towards the grieving parents she felt that shifting feeling again. ‘Don’t know how I know but think it’s all going to change again.’

 

***

She was right.

 

The house lacked the cheer it had displayed when Buffy first walked through the door and into this family’s life. Mirrors were covered with black material and there was a heavy feeling everywhere.

 

Anne sat on a stiff-backed chair, she looked as though she had aged many years and Buffy wondered just how much time had passed since that funeral she had involuntarily attended just moments before. Surely this poor family hadn’t had another death to torment them!

 

Henry came into the room and his wife laid her embroidery hoop on the arm of the settee next to her. Her smile was warm but didn’t reach her eyes.

 

“So he’s all packed then?” She couldn’t look her husband in the eye.

 

“Yes. It wasn’t easy getting him to leave behind his favorite books but they’ll be safe here while he’s away.” Henry took a seat on the settee and grasped his wife’s hand gently. “It really will be fine, Anne. We are still in mourning for sweet Alma and now with this sickness…” his voice trailed off as his gaze left Anne and turned to the fireplace. Even the fire refused to look cheery.

 

“I still think he would be fine here with us,” Anne protested. Her words didn’t have force behind them though. It was as if that’s all they were was words, all the emotion was gone from them.

 

“He’ll do well. William has always been bright and curious. This will pull him out of his sadness and keep him safe at the same time.”

 

“It does not seem fair that I should lose both of my children so close together.”

 

Henry cleared his throat, “My dear, you mustn’t think of it that way. William is merely going off to school as we always knew he would one day.”

 

“One day, yes. Not this day though,” Anne choked back a sob. “It’s been a bit less than a year since we lost our baby girl and we hadn’t planned to send William away until he was old enough for Eton.” She turned pleading eyes on her husband. “Are you certain this is for the best?”

 

Henry patted her hand sympathetically. “You were there my love. You heard Dr. Gull with your own ears. They have no idea what causes this illness but they know well how it will end.”

 

Anne closed her eyes obviously in emotional pain. “How can I bear it though? You were gone so long and that was nearly impossible. When you came back things were wonderful. I had my family around me and we prospered. Now Alma is gone. You are ill and my son is going to be several counties away from me.” A single tear rolled down her wan cheek.

 

“We must remain strong, Anne. I would prefer that William not know of my illness. He has enough on his plate preparing for school and missing his sister. Better he sees this as a positive adventure don’t you think?”

 

“Are you certain we haven’t let George unduly influence our decision?”

 

“No, love, it’s this blasted consumption that has made the timing urgent.” Henry took a deep breath and said the unthinkable. “We do not wish our son to contract the illness as well. There is a school of thought that it is inherited but I refuse to believe such a thing to be inevitable. Better he is away and safe in the fresh country air.”

 

Anne nodded, a picture of deep sadness.

 

‘At least it’s just that they’re sending the kid to school. I was afraid he’d died too,’ Buffy shuddered. ‘Guess they don’t have a local school like in my time.’

 

***

 

By now Buffy knew what that feeling meant and prepared for the next change in time and place. Since she seemed to be getting a grand tour of the bad times this family went through she tried to prepare herself for the worst.

 

William sat in the hall outside an office. He was fretting over the implications. He had long past his initial struggle with mathematics. His tutor had been a Hopkins man and now William felt as comfortable with the subject as he had back in Eton when the Classics had taken over his life and his dreams.

 

He was excelling in his studies, had avoided any of the troublemakers among his fellows and even won his share of awards. His letters home proudly shared his achievements. Of course, he hadn’t related his difficulty in making friends from among those of his peers. Many of them tended to be bullies and more than a bit pretentious. He had a couple of true friends and that was worth far more than being popular with the crowd of frilly cuffed Plonkers.

 

Buffy spotted William immediately. He’d grown! He was still on the smaller side and quite thin but was obvious that years had passed since she last saw him in that graveyard. His hair tended to unruly curls that softened the sharp planes of his face. He was wearing a somewhat severe-looking black tailcoat that added to the appearance of being older.

 

There was something about him that scratched at the back of her mind, something familiar. ‘Maybe I’m just getting used to these people. Duh! I’ve been getting peeks into his life since he was just a kid. Of course, I recognize him,’ she admonished herself. “Good looking guy. Bet he’s popular with all the girls in his class.”

 

“Mr. Pratt. He will see you now.”

 

William stood and adjusted his trousers, clearly nervous.

 

Buffy followed him into the imposing looking office. ‘Boy I know how this feels! I spent way too much time in the principal’s office after I got called! I can’t see sweet William burning down his gym though. Probably nothing more serious than not tying his tie right or something.’ She busied herself looking out the windows to the pretty grounds outside. ‘Huh, no girls. Must be an all boys school kinda place.’

 

“It is my sad duty to inform you that I have heard from your Uncle that you are needed back home. Your father has taken a turn for the worse and his days are severely numbered. Your mother is in need of your services as her only surviving child.” The man delivering this horrible news in a cold, clipped, voice glanced down at the papers on his desk and tsked. “It’s a shame given how close we are to the end of the term. Most unfortunate timing.”

 

William balled his hands in fists and fought off the urge to pummel the bastard with no heart who had reduced his concerns to merely having to leave school early instead of the world losing one fine man!

 

“I’ll make arrangements immediately,” he started to rise.

 

“No need young man. Your Uncle has arranged your rail passage. You leave in the morning.” He shuffled the papers then glanced up at last. “Shame really, you were in line for more than a few honors.”

 

“I’m certain that the only honor I’ll ever need will go with me,” William stated coldly. “Just as my father’s honor was clear for all who knew him to see.”

 

William clenched his jaw and jutted it out angrily and Buffy finally snapped to just who she was looking at. “Spike! Spike?”


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

 

Buffy hoped that when her world stopped the whole shifty-swirly thing she wouldn’t find herself at another funeral. She had really liked Henry and Anne and kinda didn’t want to think of the nice old guy being dead. ‘Okay, he’s been dead a long, long, time but it doesn’t seem like it from here.’

 

Anne and Spike, er, William (and wasn’t that a kick in the pants!) were sitting across from one another at the dinner table. He was wearing a suit that made him look like a Watcher or something and Anne had aged a ton.

 

Sp.. William was reading a newspaper as they waited for the help to bring out the food. ‘Who would have thought that Spike had help that weren’t minions? Who would have thought he had good manners for that matter.’

 

Really these reveals about just who she’d been watching made her feel dizzier than all the time shifts. She knew that Giles had said that Spike grew up on the streets of London. Probably a pickpocket or some other kind of petty thief or thug. No wonder she didn’t consider it was Spike’s past she was seeing! He wasn’t some fancy British guy like a Prince or anything but his family had money and class. She couldn’t wait to get back to normal to give him a hard time about all she had seen.

 

William turned the page in the paper and the rustling sound broke into Buffy’s gleeful thoughts. ‘Actually from what I’ve seen maybe I won’t bring up too much. I mean he lost his sister and dad and it looks like he was a pretty decent guy himself if a bit too serious. Maybe I’ll just tease him about how he loved school or something. Yeah, Giles will love knowing Spike can speak a bunch of languages.’

 

She had seen lots of everyday things that came like flashes between the full stops that let her witness major events. She’d seen him with his nose in a book a lot. She’d seen him paying total attention while his teachers droned on and on. ‘William actually liked school!’ She’d seen him tear up when reading letters from home. ‘Nope, nothing like we thought he was like.

 

The serving girl came into the room and William put the folded paper on the chair next to his.

 

“I see you were looking at something other than the financial pages William. Is there something of interest?”

 

“Nothing for you to worry over, mother,” he smiled at her sweetly. “Speaking of the financials. I went over the manifest with Uncle George yesterday. I do believe we need to have the new ship’s interior modified before they are too far along with the building. Most of our profits have been coming from commodities and I would like to try some of the newer ideas that might reduce losses from the natural humid environment of a ships hold. The key is in the building you see.”

 

Anne smiled proudly. “You’ve done so well for the firm, son. Your father would be so proud.”

 

William blushed and ducked his head shyly. “To think that once I fancied myself in a garret penning odes and sonnets! Well, at least the education father provided didn’t go to waste after all. Uncle George is still a valuable partner but his ideas are rather old-fashioned.” 

 

He nodded to the serving girl as she ladled the soup course. “Time at sea has decreased with the newer technology but there are still too many losses with some of the more delicate goods. We could increase our profits greatly by embracing even more advances. Given that we are having an entirely new ship being built even as we speak it seems to me that would be the best time to implement them. Uncle George, however, is looking at the additional costs.”

 

“My brother was always quite conservative.” Anne took a spoonful of soup then grinned, “Especially when it comes to money. I believe he squeezes a farthing hard enough to make Britannia squeal.” She leaned forward and gave her son a serious look. “Son, the company is yours. You need to do as you see fit.”

 

“Thank you, mother. Your support will give me the courage to stand my ground.”

 

‘So chubby George is still in the picture but Sp… William is going to try to be the boss. Good for him!’ Buffy felt rather proud of him that William wasn’t letting his uncle run the show. “He could use a bit of Spike’s big bad about now.” Buffy thought about that for a moment. ‘Huh. Wonder if that badass, take-no-prisoners stuff all came from the demon or if William had some of it too?’ Buffy figured she might just find out first hand unless she got swirlied out of this current stop-off on the ‘William’s life’ train.

 

***

William felt under siege from the left and the right. Uncle George on the left putting up resistance to every plan for modernization that William tried to implement. Sadly, George had so many years running the whole show that many of the investors chose to accept his wisdom over that of his wet-behind-the-ears nephew in spite of William being the owner and major share-holder.

 

Well this was one issue where he could put his foot down with alacrity! “Enough!” He looked each gentleman in the eye and stiffened his spine. “The increase in profits and decrease in losses will more than offset the additional costs. We’re modernizing. As much as I appreciate your input and your opinions, in the end, the name on this firm is Pratt and I happen to be the Pratt in question.”

 

There was a guffaw from one of the more obnoxious investors at that unfortunate wording.

 

William glared at the man. He had been the butt of many a joke over the years for many reasons but his father’s worthy surname was one area that he refused to allow to become yet another one. “Did you find something humorous in my statement of fact Mr. Chandler?”

 

The man had the good sense to blush and then cough, “No, not at all. Had great respect for your sire. Suppose his pup should have his turn at the wheel.” His blush faded as fast as it had come. “However should this be the waste of expenditures that I predict you’ll need to find new sources to invest in future projects. Your uncle George has led this firm safely through every sort of economic storm over the past years quite reliably and you have yet to prove yourself lad.”

 

“Well, that is what I’ll have to do then,” William clenched his jaw. “Those of you who stay the course will see a good return on your investments. The new additions have been sent to the builders already,” he looked defiantly at his uncle. “I believe this concludes our new business gentlemen.”

 

Buffy smiled. “Well, I guess William has a bit of backbone too. Good for you.” She really hoped this new boat would be a great one and not like a Titanic kind of thing only without Leo.

 

All the men save George filed out of the office whispering among themselves.

 

“Well, I have encouraged you to take the reins,” George sighed. “I suppose I can’t complain when you pull them a bit.”

 

William softened his gaze. “Uncle, I wouldn’t have you misunderstand. I appreciate all the years you have given to our family and the company and that you did a stellar job keeping us afloat, sometimes literally. I also value your counsel. I feel quite strongly that we need to move into the future in this way, however. Please do not think you should withhold your opinions even if I choose to go my own way.”

 

‘Kind of nice of him to let his uncle keep his dignity. He seems to get how other people feel. Good for him.’ Buffy thought about that a bit and realized some of that had come through the turning too. Spike was always a bit more insightful than she was comfortable admitting. He certainly knew her well!

 

“What of your mother’s advice?”

 

William raised an eyebrow in a very Spike-like manner. “Has she been expressing her concerns to you as well then?”

 

“I am her brother,” George chuckled. “Well?”

 

William sighed and closed his eyes. Here came the other side of the ‘must get William in order’ affront. The siege from the right front formed in front of his eyes.

 

“You know how busy I have been since I left University, uncle. I barely returned to complete my degree before … father’s … passing,” William cleared his throat and choked back the lump that formed whenever he thought about that loss. “When we lost father I had to step in and learn as I acted. I watched you. I listened to you. I studied. That alone took much of my time and attention. I had no time for frivolity.”

 

“Making a life and family of your own is far from frivolity, son.”

 

William bristled at the term ‘son’ coming from his uncle even if he knew George didn’t mean it the way it felt. All the years of George trying to impose his ideas on William’s family made it a sore point. Henry Pratt was his father, and a fine one at that! He was no other man’s son.

 

“Be that as it may, I have been rather busy as you must agree.”

 

“Yes, William. Still, Anne would like to see a grandchild and the clock is ticking.”

 

William paled a bit. “We cannot be certain. Mother still refuses to let Dr. Gull examine her and give a diagnosis. It could be merely an inflammation of the lungs.”

 

“I pray you are correct, William, but we both saw the same thing in your father at the very start.”

 

‘Oh man! Not another death! Geez can’t this family get a break?’ Buffy felt her eyes tear up a bit.

 

“I scarce know where to start if I should decide to appease mother.” William sighed once again. “You know that I didn’t precisely have a large circle of friends while at school. I’m no pariah but the connections one might have are sorely lacking for me. I would have a wife befitting the name and position. Someone with the grace of my mother and social skills that I lack.” He let out a burst of a laugh. “Now where would you suggest I find such a paragon and on short notice?”

 

“Any properly bred woman would be lucky to have you,” George asserted. “Good name, good blood and connections even if no title and a solid financial situation on top of that.”

 

“Yes and to the right person I’d like to think a good and true heart as well but again, where am I to go shopping for someone who might appreciate what I could offer?”

 

“You keep turning down invitations to join me.” George shook his head sadly. “I could have introduced you to a dozen or more choices already had you come along.”

 

“You know I couldn’t leave mother home alone. She hasn’t been well enough to enjoy society.”

 

“I am certain your mother would forgo your company in the interests of your finding a proper wife in due course.”

 

William laughed. His bluff had been called and he had no cards worth playing. George was right. At this moment in time and with a possible limit to his mother’s time to enjoy a new generation of Pratts his mother would be delighted to never see him at dinner. ‘Check and mate old man.’

 

“Very well. When is the next cattle auction to be then?”

 

George laughed, “With that attitude, you might just have difficulty making the ladies see your better qualities.”

 

“I daresay most of them feel that way themselves if they were honest. These soirees, dances and parties are mainly to promote matches are they not?”

 

“And enjoy a fine cigar and brandy,” George said.

 

“I shudder at the thought of tobacco and my brandy at home is superior to most served at these gatherings.”

 

“True, and you have a better cook as well… speaking of which…”

 

William smiled brightly, “Uncle if you wish an invitation to dinner you need not fish about. You know there is a place at our table any time you choose.”

 

Buffy was startled at Sp… William’s face in full, genuine enjoyment. When had she ever seen him truly smile? She’d seen a lifetimes worth of smirks and some fairly cruel smiles but never one of pure pleasure. Maybe Dru saw those. For some reason that made her sad to think about.

It really was beautiful. His whole face lit up and she couldn’t take her eyes off of it as everything began to swirl around her once again.

 

*** 

In the swirling mist, Buffy caught glimpses of dinners and what must be the dullest parties she’d ever seen. Always William was on the fringe looking awkward, clearly wishing to be anywhere else. Pretty dresses though! Less Gone With The Windy and more Sherlock Holmesy. ‘Well not Sherlock in the dresses but the women in the movies mom and I used to watch,’ she clarified to herself. She laughed at the idea of Basil Rathbone in a bustle.

 

She wasn’t too surprised to find herself coming to a halt at just such a party. ‘William was right. It is kind of like a cattle sale. All the girls fluttering their fans and batting their eyes at the men who had the best title or most money. Privately they were a lot like Cordy and the Cordettes on steroids. Nice to each other’s faces but knives in the back if another girl caught the eye of the guy the other girl wanted.

“Some of these guys would have to be really important and have a boatload of money to make me have to look at them every day,” Buffy shuddered. Lots of the men were old enough to be at least dating her mom, not the young girls they were courting! Lots of them needed a gym membership too not to mention having their faces deforested!

 

William could use some hair and wardrobe help but at least he was pretty! Buffy’s eyes grew wide realizing what she had just thought about Sp… William’s appearance. ‘Come on, tiger, get out there and wow some lucky lady. Make your mom happy!’ she encouraged. Buffy had never wondered if William had been married when he was turned. Come to think about it she never really thought about the human he had been much at all. Funny, since she could see parts of Spike pretty clearly in this original version for all of his lack of demon.

 

George sidled up to his nephew. “You’ll not pick a flower if you are blending in with the wallpaper.”

 

“I suppose that makes me a literal wallflower?”

 

George tutted. “Come on then. Viscount Underwood has arrived with his tribe of females. The Addams girls are all well bred and lovely. It wouldn’t hurt to do the pretty.”

 

“Very well. I shall try. You know I tend to lose all conversation after the introductions though uncle so don’t start wording invitations just yet.” William straightened his neckcloth and prepared to enter the fray. “A daughter of a Viscount is likely looking for a title anyway.”

 

“That may be my boy but there are only so many of those to go around and he has plenty of ‘em to marry off. If I were in the market I’d look to the younger of the flock. No doubt Underwood would be delighted to have one less dowry to provide to a cash-poor but titled suitor. Lots of expense for a noble wedding too.”

 

William looked at the bevy of girls following in the wake of a fairly distinguished looking man. One, in particular, caught his eye. Her eyes, that of a curious doe, flitted about the room and even landed on him for a moment. She smiled slightly and with that captured his heart.


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

 

William went from looking like he was waiting for a dentist to fire up the drill to a man completely besotted in the blink of an eye. Buffy felt something that she could almost (okay, in the teensiest, tiniest of ways) think was jealousy. He was looking at the simpering brunette hussy who was batting her eyelashes at him as if she were prime steak and he was a starved man.

 

“...and this is my youngest, Cecily.” The stately matron completed her introductions. They had been made to George, of course. His minor title of Baronet didn’t make him a peer but it did elevate him over a simple Mister.

 

William was finally presented to the ladies. Cecily used her fan to show her best features, those eyes, to advantage. She loved practicing her wiles, capturing hearts. Looked like she had just added one to her collection already, that made her smile softly. She did love a conquest!

 

The poor boy looked enchanted. Shame he didn’t have the proper breeding for the future father of her children. She could bring him up to scratch within a fortnight! ‘Of course, he would be a work in the rough. His valet would have to be sacked at once! His wardrobe was a disgrace and his hair was in need of a sharp pair of scissors.’ Cecily could shine him up quite nicely were he suitable in all the ways that mattered. Still, it would be fun to ply her skills on him. It would be amusing to watch him think he had a chance. She made sure to smile a bit more pointedly his way as she was formally introduced.

 

“Lovely,” he more breathed than spoke. William bowed elegantly and kissed the gloved fingertips offered for his address. “That is… lovely to make your acquaintance.”

 

‘Nice baritone, such a waste with that face and voice. Not a prospect though,’ she thought dismissively.

 

***

 

Between glimpses of William busily at work waiting for the new ship to arrive and prove his critics wrong by having fewer losses of cargo and comfortable evenings at home with his mother who wasn’t looking so good Buffy was starting to wonder why they were stuck on this particular time period.

 

Okay, truth told she was rather sick of this Cecily girl. That was the other thing she had to watch. William was head-over-heels in something with the twit. He was writing poetry, sending flowers that he spent hours choosing. Seems there was some kind of message people sent with flowers back in this day. He’d even bought a book called a floriography that told what each kind of flower meant. William was too shy for any of the racy flowers. Buffy snorted at that concept. He stuck with a lot that meant purity of intention and stuff like that. Buffy wondered if Cecily even noticed.

 

“I say, William, we need to increase the watchmen at the warehouse. With the ‘Lady Anne’ coming to port later this week we will want to be certain we don’t have the goods unprotected like Wallace over at Wapping. Several warehouses they’ve used for years have been left open for theft due to those horrible murders plaguing the area.” George placed the Times in front of his nephew and pointed.

 

“See here, just last night two dockworkers and one woman of low character were found butchered not far from his main warehouse!”

 

William glanced at the gruesome drawing gracing the paper and shivered before closing his eyes. “Yes. We wouldn’t wish an employee to be in danger, I agree.”

 

“Yes there is that of course but some of the unattended warehouses have lost goods as well and after the extra spent on this new ship of ours we don’t wish to incur any loss that can be prevented.”

 

William loved his uncle but while his focus on the bottom line had made the family a tidy, if small, fortune it often made him sound uncaring. William knew well that the old man had a soft heart for those he loved and even those in his employ.

 

“No, we will do all we can to prevent these ruffians and murderers from wreaking havoc with our business and more importantly our people.” He glanced at the article, a story that was, sadly, not new. “Savages! Bodies torn and bloodless! I can’t bear to think on it. You are absolutely right. We need to look into good steady men to shore up security. I don’t want to lose anyone to these barbarians.”

 

“You think it’s more than one?”

 

“I would think so, uncle. Dockworkers are not usually victims of violence unless they have had too much to drink and our few with that vice have not stayed in the job long. Most would be able to fight off a single madman. I suspect a criminal ring of some sort, but of a brutish bent.” He thrust the paper away and shook his head to clear the images away.

 

“As I said, I prefer to think on things of beauty and grace,” he smiled. “We will take precautions and not sully our minds with horrors such as this.”

 

*** 

 

Buffy watched as William slowly turned into a mushy pile of goo over a girl with all the warmth of Cordy. ‘What the hell is wrong with you?’ Maybe his mom constantly telling him he needed to get married and pump out those 2.5 kid had hypnotized him or something. The guy she had come to kind of know and even admire as he stood up to his uncle and showed confidence was suddenly back to making googly eyes at a girl that Buffy was sure was a be-atch privately. ‘She has that look.’

 

The new ship was finally finished and on its maiden voyage and all William could do was write poems about Cecily and her eyes like balls of honey and voice like some bird or other. ‘Bird brain, more like it,’ Buffy snarked. Really the more she saw of Cecily Addams the less she liked her.

 

There had been party after party where she would keep William on a string, make those cow eyes at him so he would think she was interested in him too only to flit off to do the same thing with an old goat with a title. William couldn’t even see it! ‘He thinks she’s just has a wonderful talent for being a hostess!’ God! Men were so blind!

 

The girl was enjoying it too. Buffy could see the smirk on her face when she would see William scribbling away, looking up to smile at her then write some more. ‘Why does she get poems?’ Buffy never got poems except for that book that Angel gave to her with poems he didn’t even write. He’d just signed it, “Always, Angel” like that was all he needed to say. ‘He didn’t even underline parts of the poems that made him think of me.’

 

Anne was getting excited too. She was practically knitting baby booties. ‘I guess I do get that,’ Buffy admitted.

 

The only thing that had burst Williams big floaty bubble had been when the doctor had finally confirmed their worst suspicions.

 

“I am so terribly sorry, Mrs. Pratt. I would venture a guess that your dedicated nursing of your husband in the final stages of his illness made you susceptible.”

 

Anne had paled and her hands shook as they rested on her lap. William looked as if he’d been pole-axed.

 

“I don’t suppose you have any idea how much time I might have to look forward to?”

 

“This is an ancient disease yet we still know so little about it. Dr. Rene Laennec, brilliant professor at the College de France, did extensive studies up to his own death from it in ‘26. He gave us a much better understanding of the illness but unfortunately no cure as yet. There are so very many theories and so few successes.” The somewhat sad-faced doctor with thinning hair stood and began to put his instruments back in his bag. “There is no way to give you a true answer about the time you may have left. The only sure thing I can tell you is that barring a miracle or a miraculous cure it is always fatal but you already know that.”

 

The doctor turned to William, “Mr. Pratt, you could arrange for your mother to be cared for at a sanatarium. There are a few that are quite nice, plush even. She would be quite comfortable in the country. There has been limited success especially in Germany, if you are willing to look outside Britain, something about the pure mountain air is the current thought on why. Other than that I can only advise rest, eating well and taking a bit of exercise outdoors when the air is clear and not overly dark from soot.”

 

Anne grasped William’s hand hard enough to cause pain but he didn’t say a word to her, merely patted her gently on the shoulder. “If that would guarantee a cure I’d not hesitate a moment no matter the cost but mother has made it clear that her desire is to remain with her family.”

The doctor looked at the pair and nodded. “Yes, I understand fully. There is comfort in the known and your mother’s emotional distress would be lessened by remaining at home. Well, good day to you madam, Mr. Pratt.”

 

William walked the doctor to the door, “Is there anything I might do that could ease her suffering. When the coughing becomes too severe it frightens her so although she does her best not to show it.”

 

“I wish there was.” He looked at William with sadness. “You need to remember that there is a school of thought that those who are the caregivers run the risk of contracting consumption themselves.”

 

William drew himself up to full height, “I will not abandon my mother.”

 

“Of course you won’t,” the doctor clasped the young man’s hand. “You are a good son.”

 

There were no poems that day nor for many days that followed.

 

***

 

“William, you mustn’t mope about here with me!” Anne was busily at work on another small blanket, knitting needles clashing rhythmically. “I saw the invitation. How can you continue to pursue that lovely girl you are smitten with if you never see her? You cannot let your chance slip by just to sit by the fireside and read to your ailing mother. Besides I’m feeling quite the thing lately. I believe the fresh air each morning has done wonders.”

 

William would have loved to believe her but the coughing that often came at night put paid to that dream fairly quickly. “You know I enjoy spending evenings with you. I was never one for the flighty social life.”

 

“Then do it for me, son. Court the girl, marry her and we can all have quiet evenings here at home together,” she implored.

 

Buffy winced. She couldn’t see Cecily Addams ever accepting William’s suit much less sit around the cozy parlor with her husband and mother-in-law. No, that girl had ambitions.

 

Buffy had noticed her games even if William hadn’t. She would have laid odds that Cecily of the cow eyes was planning to land a much bigger fish. Didn’t even matter that the Baron in question looked pretty much like a fish physically. Buffy hoped she did marry him, it would serve her right for how she played poor William.

 

“I wouldn’t dare to presume, mother. Miss Addams is a diamond, she could have her choice. To think she would settle for me is…”

 

“Nonsense! You have everything any girl could hope for and offer far more than most of us get. You have a true heart and a romantic nature to go along with it. She would be the fortunate one.”

 

Buffy had to give Anne that one. William really was a nice guy. He wouldn’t be the kind of husband to run off with his secretary in a few years either. ‘Gee even as a vampire he was loyal. He stayed with Ditzy-Dru for a hundred years!’

 

Funny, but Buffy could see that even as a human Spike took care of the people he loved. Yet another thing that was there before the demon… ‘not that a demon can really love,’ she desperately tried to remind herself. She tried to block the voice that argued, ‘this one can. You saw it and even used it when you threatened Dru to get Spike to let all those kids go at the vamp fan club meeting. You knew he loved her enough to do it.’

 

“We shall see how you are feeling as the date for the musicale gets closer.”

 

“You mustn’t wait too long to respond though, William, it wouldn’t be polite.”

 

William smiled tenderly, ”I know that dearest mother. You raised me to be a proper gentleman. I’ll send my acceptance but be warned if you take a bad turn I’ll not hesitate to remain at home.”

 

Anne patted his hand gently, “I know William. I do appreciate your care.”

 

“It is truly my privilege, mother. I would see you happy all of my days if I could.”

 

Buffy looked closely at William and tried to figure out his age. He looked about like he did as Spike. She realized in a bit of shock that he must have been killed not too long after this time. He probably was going to get that wish, just not the way he would have expected.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter End Notes:  
> In canon it was never explicitly stated that Cecily was already a vengeance justice demon when she met William. The comics seemed to indicate that she was but not on the aired episodes that we all agree are canon. I headcanon that she was merely a vapid shrew of a human well on her way to recruitment. I wrote a story with my version of her background that made sense to me. I always thought that her actions that led to William being turned (and all the deaths that followed) got D'Hoffryn's notice just as Willow's "Will Be Done" spell and Aud's spell against Olaf led to D'Hoffryn approaching them. 
> 
> If you are interested in my take on Cecily/Halfrek the story is The Ice Queen and can be found here: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6142696/chapters/14074900


	8. Chapter 8

Chapter 8

 

Buffy was exhausted just watching William jump through hoops trying to take care of a worsening Anne, bolstering her mood and preventing her from declining faster. At the same time, he was keeping their firm prospering, modernizing and increasing profits. He was also trying with everything in him to further his suit with the Addams bitch. Buffy suspected a lot of that last part had more to do with making his mother happy than an actual desire for the girl. He was too distracted by his mother’s illness to jump into a relationship with the actual joy of young love.

 

Oh, the poetry continued. Most of it only heard by Anne as William read his latest ode to the lovely Cecily to her after dinner. Anne’s eyes sparkled at the possibility of seeing her fondest dreams coming within reach!

 

The lady was beginning to look a bit vampiric herself every day. Pale and nearly gaunt at times and when the coughing took hold, the blood-spattered handkerchief accentuated the look.

 

William was trying so hard to be perfect. The perfect, dutiful son in how he treated his mother and in trying to fulfill her wishes. The perfect successful businessman and innovator with the firm. The perfect suitor with love poems and flowers and doting attention. He was stretching himself too thin and Buffy was starting to see the cracks. There was a nervousness to his movements, awkwardness to his words. He often seemed a man uncomfortable in his own skin.

 

“Of course all those assholes he has to hang around don’t help much!” Buffy had seen him bullied during his school years. She didn’t like it then and liked it less now. Sure it seemed to be fairly common, at least the school bullying, but still! The guy had enough to deal with. He didn’t need his supposed friends making him the butt of their jokes. ‘So the guy likes poetry! What’s wrong with that?’ Buffy saw the kind of things those other guys thought were great pastimes. “Man, they sure could have used TV back then! No wonder Spike loves to watch it all the time.”

 

It was like watching a bunch of hyenas eyeballing a weakened antelope. They would wait for William to say something or do something that showed he wasn’t as polished as they were and they’d pounce.

 

Oh, they admired his abilities to make them money on their investments. That was the main reason they invited him to their gatherings, to pick his brain. His newly outfitted ship had proven his vision. No one lost a penny on the last couple of shipments, all cargo came through without any big loss. They all certainly liked that about William Pratt. Still, they made sure that just because they let him in their circle, he would know that he was not one of them.

 

As for William, well he had a bride to woo and a mother to please.

 

***

Anne was coughing hard enough that she had to hold her ribs for the pain of it. The maid was beside herself with worry as the handkerchief was flooded with bright red blood.

 

“Oh my Lady, please let me send for mister William. He’ll be so upset if he found you needed him and he was away from home!”

 

“Nellie, you mustn’t bother William. He has business to attend to. There is really no need to further worry the boy over a bit of a cough and some blood,” she waved her hand as if to dismiss the importance of her worsening condition. “Truly, I insist you not tell him of this spell. I’ll be fine after a bit of rest.”

 

The maid, Nellie, looked doubtful but was obedient. “I’ll just fix you up with a spot of tea then?”

 

“Yes, that would be lovely,” Anne smiled before the coughing resumed.

 

‘Yeah, not going to be able to hide this much longer,’ Buffy shook her head. She had watched as Anne’s condition deteriorated on a daily basis. She knew that as much as Anne tried to hide it from William he was aware of the worsening of his mother’s health.

 

Buffy had watched him confer with the doctor and with his uncle George more than once. The poor guy kept running his hand through his hair in frustration until there was no taming of his curls no matter how hard his valet tried.

 

It suddenly struck Buffy that Spike’s doting concern for Dru wasn’t that different from his care for his mother. ‘Guess Spike got his caregiving nature from William. At least Anne is worthy of that devotion.’ 

 

It was clear to Buffy that Anne loved her son dearly. Events had shown that Dru hadn’t been capable of the same.

 

***

 

Buffy was bemused watching the guy. On the home front he was competent and mature but put him in a social setting and he was as lost as a puppy in a cattery. He became tongue-tied and awkward and that was just with the other males! The girls just tittered behind their fans.

 

When his targeted bride, ‘Cecily the Cold’, was present it only got worse. Buffy sensed a bit of desperation in William the longer he pursued this girl. Yeah, his mom wanted to go to that wedding and hold a grandbaby but the pressure was causing William to sabotage himself. Well, it might have if he had a snowball’s chance in hell with the bitca anyway.

 

William was too distracted to notice that he was being played. True he was naive as well. He just couldn’t see the cruel streak in the girl. He saw the good manners and well-modulated voice. He saw how she moved with grace and her casual smiles, how she chatted with ease. He saw all the polish her father had paid to have installed in his daughters. Unfortunately, he missed the cold and calculating look in her eyes. He missed the falseness of her charming laughs and feigned interest.

 

Maybe he just couldn’t see that women were as prone to false faces as men, Buffy considered. He had no trouble seeing the back-stabbing nature of the “frilly cuffed crowd” as he called the men in his circle. Maybe it was because all the women in his life had been decent made it difficult for him to expect anything less from the fairer sex. He’d learned well about his male peers while in school.

 

William knew there was a clock ticking away his mother’s life. He knew that to truly make her happy he needed to be settled with someone Anne would approve of and Cecily seemed a perfect fit for that role.

 

Buffy understood what was happening but she also knew enough girls like Cecily to know that there was only heartbreak in the cards for the shy young man with the earnest intentions and poetic heart.

 

‘Man William was sure a horrible judge of women! First this disaster then a century with a complete loon.’ Buffy shook her head. What was it with nice guys? It seemed like they always went for the women who would chew them up and spit them out and not bat an eye.

 

Anne was fading before his eyes. There was no way even an optimist could hold out much hope that she would see the New Year that was a few months away. Every day brought more desperate determination to William. He would see his mother happy if it killed him.

 

***

 

Another party. Buffy was exhausted. She could just imagine how William was faring.

 

He had nearly forgotten this gathering. He had sent his acceptance two weeks prior and only the reminder from the family housekeeper had kept him from committing a social faux pas that would send his reputation even further into the dust. He had been assured that the affair was a casual gathering. So he cut corners and decided to stay in his business suit lest he be late due to taking the time to change. It was a decision he regretted as soon as he entered the salon.

 

His tweed jacket and open-necked shirt stood out from the sea of proper evening attire worn by the other guests. He could see the raised eyebrows and knowing looks. He especially noted the smirk on the face of Lawrence Kenwood, the very same “friend” who had assured him that it would be quite informal.

 

William suspected that he had been set up for ridicule, even more than usual. Nothing like being the joke.

 

He retreated to a side-room and decided to work on his latest composition. Perhaps the lovely Cecily would realize that being in her company mattered far more to him than worry over his wardrobe. Surely she would see his haste as a compliment! This might be the very thing to finally convince her that he would treasure her above and over all else if she would just give him the chance.

 

Buffy watched the society stuffed-shirts as they tittered and cast smug looks at the oblivious seeming William. She had to give it to him, he didn’t let their attitude dissuade him from his pursuit of Cecily. William clearly knew they held him in low regard but he persisted. ‘Just like Spike. Doesn’t know when to take no for an answer.’

 

There was stubborn and there was stupid and William was teetering on that fine line. Buffy felt like she was watching a tightrope walker in high wind.

 

***

Buffy couldn’t watch him fall, she just couldn’t. She moved around eavesdropping on the other guests and felt a sense of dread build with each conversation. Seems like it wasn’t only William she was going to get a look at if her hunch was right. She wasn’t sure how she felt about that.

 

“It really is astonishing how these murderers are managing to elude the authorities. Peeler's boys are rather good at apprehending barbarous ruffians after all. Just how many poor victims have there been?” The portly gentleman shuddered as he waited for his companion to respond.

 

“Fifteen just this past week according to the Times. All of them completely exsanguinated. They are calling this gang of murderers the Bride Street Butchers because all their latest victims were in the area of the printing works. They believe it is the same gang that was confining itself to the warehouses by the docks earlier this year.”

 

“Well they are moving through London like a hot knife through butter and the constabulary needs to step up their game before they settle into the better neighborhoods. It’s one thing to have dock workers and printers at risk and quite another for the better classes to fear to leave their homes!”

 

Nods all around greeted that proclamation. Buffy felt rage burn at the callous way this group looked on honest working people as if they were worth less just because they had less!

 

Buffy was fairly certain the gang was the trio of vampires known as the Scourge of Europe. She was a bit surprised that Angelus was staying so long in one area and that they were killing so frequently. Then again it seemed that they were managing to fly under the radar. It served to help them that no one seemed to imagine they were dealing with anything other than lower class criminals much less of the non-human variety.

 

“My Charity refuses to go out nights until they are captured and properly hung,” said the man who had started the conversation. He chuckled, “I suppose I should thank the blighters for that! Gives me the chance to eye all the lovely ladies without having to listen to her complaints for weeks thereafter.”

 

All the men in the circle laughed. “Now if I could only convince Alice of the same, “ replied his nearly bald companion.

 

“At least all the young lovelies of the season seem plucky enough to venture out.”

 

“Take more than some ruffians to keep ‘em from a chance at an advantageous marriage.”

 

“Yes, there is that.”

 

Baldy raised his glass and agreed, “Here, here! And our good fortune to enjoy their company as they work their way through all the eligibles.”

 

*** 

 

“Okay, better to hang with William. At least he doesn’t make my blood boil.” Buffy headed to the side room where she had last seen him.

 

He was furiously scribbling away at his latest effort to woo Cecily it seemed. He was in the middle of a conversation with a waiter or butler or whatever they called them. “... What’s another word for gleaming? It’s a perfectly perfect word as many words go but the bother is nothing rhymes you see.”

 

The waiter looked down his nose at the gentleman who didn’t have sense enough to realize he shouldn’t be talking to someone lower in stature to himself in such a familiar way and then moved away from William without offering any suggestions.

 

‘Shining. Glowing…’ Buffy thought. ‘What am I thinking. No, what is HE thinking! The only thing gleaming about her is her eyes when she sees another fat rich guy with a title!’

 

He began to smile and rapidly wrote whatever word he’d come up with then glanced up at the commotion of the fashionably late arrival. Cecily, of course.

 

‘And here comes the dopey look,’ Buffy sniped. ‘Wish she’d trip on all that skirt around her feet and land on her gleaming butt. Wouldn’t be so swoon-worthy then!’

 

William got up and headed towards the girl like a moth to the flame. ‘Moths burn up,’ Buffy thought.

 

He didn’t make it to his target though. One of the men Buffy had just been listening to stopped him as he was making his way through the crowd.

 

“Ah, William! Favor us with your opinion. What do you make of this rash of disappearances and murders sweeping through our town? Animals or thieves?”

 

A preoccupied William watched as Cecily wove her way through her pack of admirers. If he didn’t get there quickly she would be impossible to get near enough to pay his address! The last thing he wanted to do was converse with this pompous ass.

 

“I prefer not to think of such dark, ugly business at all. That’s what the police are for.” He gazed at Cecily with softening eyes. “I prefer placing my energies into creating things of beauty.”

 

Another man in the group grabbed the paper William was holding, the one with the poem he had been struggling over moments before. William looked horrified.

 

“I see. Well don’t withhold, William,” he taunted as he glanced at the words on the paper.

 

The man who had first accosted William drawled, “Rescue us from a dreary topic.”

 

William tried to snatch his poem back and began to panic as he realized the bully was going to read it aloud. “Careful, the inks are still wet. Please, it’s not finished,” his voice was low and imploring.

 

“Don’t be shy.” the bully straightened and began to read. “My heart expands, ‘tis grown a bulge in it,” his inflection made certain that the words were as vulgar sounding as possible. “Inspired by your beauty...effulgent.” He began to cackle as the laughter built around them. “Effulgent?”

 

Cecily, tuned in to the laughter and seeing William there and the glances shot her way hastily left the room. William grabbed his poem back and made to follow her. He had to make certain she knew that the laughter was not directed at her at all. Better she know he was the fool than have her tender heart hurt thinking they made gest of her!

 

Buffy both wanted to follow and didn’t. She really didn’t want to see William have his heart stomped on and she knew that was what was coming!

 

“Have you heard? They call him William the Bloody because of his bloody awful poetry!”

 

Buffy gasped. ‘His poetry? They gave him that name for his poetry? The council said it was because he was so vicious as a vampire. Did they get any of their stuff right?’

 

“It suits him. I’d rather have a railroad spike through my head than listen to that awful stuff!”

 

Buffy found this group disgusting to make fun of someone just because they tried to write something pretty for a bitch like Cecily. ‘Be careful what you wish for buckaroo because that can be arranged.’

 

Buffy arrived in the side room in the middle of the exchange between William and Cecily. Clearly, the girl was unhappy and felt she had been made a laughing stock. Buffy had no idea what had already been said but the part she was hearing was bad enough.

 

“...but are they about me?”

 

‘As if you didn’t know,’ Buffy huffed. Really the girl had been playing William for months! She knew full well that he thought she hung the moon.

 

William’s look should have melted an iceberg from the warmth. “Every syllable,” he admitted. Obviously, the warmth was lost on Cecily though.

 

“Oh, God!” She looked horrified.

 

William began to scramble seeing that she was not pleased with his admission. “I know it’s sudden and… please, if they are no good, they’re only words. But the feeling behind them…” It was now or never. “I love you, Cecily.”

 

Her look of horror grew. Buffy had seen girls look at worms with more affection. “Please! Stop!”

 

William tried again. Buffy had to give it to him, he was persistent.

 

“I know I’m a bad poet but I’m a good man and all I ask is that you try to see me…”

 

He WAS a good man. Better than that hussy deserved and Buffy wished she could tell her so. He wasn’t that bad a poet either. Okay, it wasn’t good like the love songs Boyz II Men sang or Celine Dion warbled but his rhymes weren’t terrible. At least Buffy understood what they meant not like some poems she had to memorize in English Lit.

 

The bitch had been looking down her snooty nose and talking while Buffy had been distracted by her own thoughts. “...You’re nothing to me, William. You’re beneath me.” Then she turned in a cloud of floofy dress and sashayed out of the room without a backward look.

 

William was crushed.

Buffy watched as William also left utterly humiliated, his heart in tatters. She wished so hard that she wasn’t a ghost because she wanted nothing more than to smack the fake smile off of the witch’s face and tell the whole bunch of them off.

 

William had never said or done a damned thing to any of them. He’d made more than a few of them a ton of money. They had no reason to pick on him like this! The poor guy was having to watch his mother die and didn’t need or deserve to have this happen. Cecily had said William was beneath her but the truth was that William was so much more than that cat should ever hope to win!

 

By the time Buffy caught up to William her heart was in her throat. There was Dru and William was ripe for the picking.

 

“NO!” Buffy shouted to no avail. She knew where this was headed.

 

Dru was weaving slightly like a snake. “I see what you want. Something glowing and glistening. Something,” she looked up at William from under her lashes and lowered her voice, “effulgent.”

 

William was gobsmacked! This strange and compelling woman seemed to be on his wavelength. Given the set down he’d just received it felt like a blessing from God himself to have someone see him and not find him wanting.

 

Dru was staring straight into his eyes and he was entranced. He felt a pull toward this woman unlike any other before including the one who had just dashed all his hopes with a few hurtful words.

 

“Do you want it?”

 

William wasn’t sure what ‘it’ was but he knew he had never wanted anything more in his life. “Oh, yes!” He hazarded to reach out and touch her. “God, yes,” he breathed.

 

“No, no you really don’t,” Buffy felt like hitting something or someone. She was so powerless to stop what was happening.

 

Once more the world began to shift and swirl and Buffy felt her stomach drop. This time it was caused by knowing what was happening in that alleyway instead of the vertigo of the shift.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter End Notes:  
> ***
> 
> A/N: Consumption (TB) was so prolific in the 1800’s that having the disease become something of a fashion statement of sorts (like the 80’s and 90’s with “heroin chic”). https://hyperallergic.com/415421/consumptive-chic-a-history-of-beaty-fashion-disease/
> 
> More than a few “celebrities” helped to cement that attitude with quotes such as these: “Consumption, I am aware, is a flattering malady,” wrote Charlotte Brontë in 1849. And Lord Byron is quoted thus: Byron once remarked to his friend, Lord Sligo, “I should like, I think, to die of consumption.” When Lord Sligo asked why, Byron replied, “Because then all the women would say ‘See that poor Byron – how interesting he looks in dying.”
> 
> https://valmcbeath.com/consumption-the-most-feared-of-diseases/#.W8p5TmhKjIU
> 
>  
> 
> Some dialogue from Fool For Love written by Douglas Petrie


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Notes:  
> A/N Some dialogue from Destiny written by David Fury and Steven S. DeKnight. I have altered canon slightly and kept Darla there for this meeting. In canon she had flitted off to the Master and returned later. I had better use for her here.
> 
>  
> 
> Word origin of 'mene, mene, tekel, upharsin' Aramaic: numbered, numbered, weighed, divided. Daniel 5:25

Chapter 9

 

Buffy was finally in a place that felt familiar. Night in a cemetery and waiting for a new vampire to rise. It felt a bit like the time she waited to drive a stake in her old friend Ford. Sometimes the pleasure of dusting a vampire, of doing her duty, was anything but pleasurable.

 

She felt that she knew William. She liked him. Even knowing he would still be around for another century or so didn’t keep her from mourning the man William had been and all he could have been if he hadn’t had his heart crushed and met up with Dru.

 

‘Poor Anne!’ Buffy wondered how his mother would cope with all her family now gone. “She’ll still have George, but it's not the same. Bet he sends her to one of those sanitariums. She won’t mind now since her family’s all dead. I’ll bet she’ll want to go.”

 

Dru wafted into view and stopped suddenly, her back straightening and game face coming to the fore. She looked around as if searching for something or someone. “Moonbeams and sunshine all together. Miss Edith never said to dress for the opera!” She looked around again. “Eyes pry in my garden but cannot touch my jasmine. They bloom in the night and this knight is mine.” Her eyes narrowed as if her words had been a challenge.

 

‘Wow! She was batshit even then,’ Buffy stared as the vampiress began to twirl in a macabre dance to a tune only she could hear.

 

“No worm meal from my pretty boy. Mummy’s here to steal the feast,” Dru giggled.

 

As Buffy watched, the earth covering the new grave began to shift and move as long, tapered, fingers with ragged nails worked their way out of the dirt as if reaching for a life that was forever out of reach.

 

She watched as little by little William the Bloody was born.

 

“My pretty boy,” Dru danced and clapped in glee. “We’ll paint ever so many lovely pictures together. Rivers of red and all the little dollies will not have their cakes again.”

 

Buffy shivered and hoped this little excursion to hell would be over now and she wouldn’t have a ringside seat at THAT art show.

 

William struggled his way from the grave. Thin bits of wood and piles of dirt flew as he scrambled for the air he no longer needed. His eyes were wild with terror and confusion. Oddly his face remained his human one.

 

Dru did nothing to help her fledge but merely watched. She frowned a bit seeing his handsome human features. “My lovely demon’s shy. Come out my dark devil and dance under the moon,” she coaxed.

 

“Why isn’t he in game face?” Buffy wondered. She had seen more fledges rise than she could count and couldn’t remember one that came out looking human. ‘Every vamp I’ve dusted right out of the grave was nearly slathering for blood and all demon.” Buffy shook her head as if she was seeing things.

 

‘Well, Spike always was a rebel. Maybe he started out that way.’

 

William blinked in confusion and appeared frightened as he took in the snake-like vision of the woman he last remembered seeing before death claimed him.

 

He shook off the dirt and looked around. ‘Maybe not so dead,’ he considered. He didn’t feel dead. In fact, he had never felt better, stronger, than he felt at that moment.

 

“What am I? … What are you?”

 

Dru clapped like a child just offered her first pony. “I’m your mummy, your princess, and you are my dark knight. Now show mummy your deadly face,” she ordered.

 

William cringed as he felt bones shift accompanied by a horrible crunching sound. Suddenly he took note that his senses were sharper than they had ever been.

 

He could hear all the night sounds that he was used to but along with them was the sound of scurrying, crawling things. Things best left in graves.

 

He could see even though the moon was but a sliver. His eyes focusing like they hadn’t for many years. No blurring of the distance and everything, no matter how small, was in sharp relief.

 

He could smell the richness of the loam, the growing things. Unfortunately, he could also smell the rotting things beneath him just as acutely.

 

He tried to gather his thoughts, to understand just what had happened to him.

 

He remembered the humiliation and pain. He could almost still feel the wetness of his tears. He remembered the resignation of failure, knowing Cecily was not to be his, had never cared. Judging from the laughter from her circle of friends, no other eligible lady would be interested either. He had failed his mother and was doomed to a life alone.

 

He thought back and had the memory of the dark enchantress who looked into his eyes and spoke to his soul.

 

Did he even have a soul any longer?

 

He found to his surprise that he didn’t really care one way or another. He was William Pratt, the same fellow he had always been and he was bloody starving!

 

“How long was I unconscious ma’am?”

 

Dru giggled once again. It was rather annoying. “Not unconscious, being born.”

 

Oh dear, she was an escapee from Bedlam and he had no clue where he was other than in a cemetery. Judging by its unkempt condition, one of the poorer ones. ‘Naturally this woman would be mad. She offered herself to me after all.’ William closed his eyes and felt all hope leave.

 

“I must get home! Mother will be worried,” he frowned and wondered why the words came out with a slight lisp. He had never had a speech impediment before.

 

“I’m your mummy now and baby must be fed. Miss Edith says the lullaby can’t be sung until the babe drinks his meal.” The strange woman moved faster than William ever saw another being move and fetched something from the bushes.

 

The man in her grasp looked half dead already, too far gone to even tremble in fear. “Eat up like a good boy,” Dru crooned.

 

William shuddered. “I’m no cannibal madam,” he sounded affronted.

 

Dru giggled once more. Buffy rolled her eyes. ‘Really, how could he stand a hundred minutes with this nut job much less a hundred years?’

 

“Course you’re not, silly boy. You’re a vampire. Made to slash and bash and kill. A knight made for the night. Made you just for me,” she moved closer to William dragging the intended victim with her. “Need your strength, you will.” She thrust the poor man at the newly risen vampire. “Right on the neck is best for naughty schoolboys.”

 

William hesitated but the pull was too great. The demon within clearly knew what it needed and he latched on to the man’s neck.

 

“Not there,” Dru tsked. She adjusted William’s position and moved his mouth to better hit the jugular to get the maximum amount of blood, with the least effort, into the new vampire.

 

William worried the wound like a dog with a chew toy and drank the man down in great gulps.

 

As the warm blood flowed into him, William felt the life force within himself strengthen as it left the man and he understood on some basic level. It wasn’t merely blood, it was life itself he fed upon.

 

Buffy felt tears on her cheeks as she watched the formerly gentle William transform into the monster. William was gone, only his body had risen from that grave.

 

When there wasn’t a drop left in the man William dropped the body. It landed partly in the grave William had just vacated.

 

He threw his head back and growled like the animal he now was. Buffy felt a twinge where her heart was and mourned the man.

 

William stilled and then looked about him as if he thought there might be an audience to his first feast. His brow furrowed.

 

He remained still, listening, scenting.

 

There was nothing his enhanced senses detected and he relaxed. ‘Perhaps a side effect of the blood,’ he mused. ‘Maybe the devil’s spying on his new acquisition?’

 

No, not the devil. William had the uncanny feeling of being watched and more than that, of being judged. Surely if it were Beelzebub he’d find no fault in William’s performance thus far. Certainly, his maker seemed well pleased. Dru was smiling widely.

 

“So my lovely, what else does a vampire do?”

 

“First you meet daddy and grandmum,” Dru held out a beckoning hand. “They have to let me keep you. You’re not like the others were. You’re a strong doggy already.”

 

William shook his head and resumed his human face. “Not a dog, princess. Said yourself, I’m a knight.” He rather fancied playing a courtly role in this new life.

 

“My knight,” Dru insisted. “But first daddy must approve.” She bit her bottom lip drawing blood. “Come give us a kiss then, my knight.”

 

William swept Dru into his arms and licked the blood from her bottom lip before crashing his lips to her mouth in a passionate embrace.

 

He felt himself harden and gave thanks that it seemed part of him was still a man in some way at least.

 

“Okay. No vamp porno please,” Buffy begged to whatever Power might owe her a favor.

 

William broke from their kiss, panting with desire and need. He knew both well. What to do with the desire, how to quench the need, was another thing altogether.

 

Did the same rules apply to vampires as with human society? When this dark temptress said he was to meet her father did that mean the same sort of courtship he was familiar with? Had he transgressed already with his demanding kiss? The lady seemed unoffended.

 

Buffy was relieved as the scene shifted. If Spike was going to dance the horizontal tango in the graveyard with Dru she really didn’t want to watch.

 

*** 

“You’ve been a starved one, haven’t you, my sweet Willy?”

 

Dru and William were weaving, arms about one another as they entered a fancy hotel suite.

 

“I’ve got you to fest on now, pet. Is this your home?”

 

“Their home,” Dru nodded towards a pair posed as if sitting normally, all life drained from them and eyes staring into nothingness. “Ambassador to something and his plump lovely wife. Til their spirits flew away on fairy wings.” She dropped her voice to a whisper. “When Angelus took them for dinner.”

 

William stared at the corpses. He was still getting used to this new life that was intimately entwined with death. “Who the bloody hell is Angelus?” He didn’t notice the other male across the room but Dru did.

 

“Look what I made! It’s called Willy.”

 

William looked at the rather imposing man who was giving him the once over with narrowed eyes and automatically corrected the hated nickname he had never permitted from anyone,” William.”

 

Dru noted the severe look on her Sire’s face. “You’re not cross with me, are you? You did say I could have one.”

 

Angelus sauntered across the room and grasped William’s arm forcing it into a beam of sunlight coming through the window. They both watched as smoke rose from their exposed skin. “Cross?” He kept his eyes on William daring him to flinch from the burning sun. It was clearly a pissing contest and William was determined to win. “We’ve no part with those, now do we?”

 

“Do you have any idea what it’s like having nothing but women as travel companions, night in and night out?” He asked William.

 

William pulled his hand away from Angelus and glared at him. “Touch me again…” he threatened.

 

Angelus was not cowed or threatened in the least. In fact, he completely ignored William’s anger. “Don’t mistake me. I do love the ladies. It’s just lately… I’ve been wondering what it’d be like to share the slaughter of innocents with another man.” He finally pulled his own smoldering hand from the sunlight. “Don’t think that makes me some kind of a deviant, hmm?”

 

William sensed the challenge and put his own hand back into the sunlight staring straight at the older vampire, determined to be his equal.

 

Angelus laughed, “I like this one! You and me, we’re gonna be the best of friends.”

 

A stylish blonde entered the room, brow raised and an amused look on her face. “What have you brought us, Dru?”

 

“It’s mine,” Dru simpered.

 

“Now, now, Drusilla,” Angelus sounded like a schoolmaster talking to a difficult student. “You know that nothing is yours unless I give it to you.”

 

William had been watching the dynamic between these vampires with interest but also with distraction. He felt that sense of being watched again and strongly. He looked sharply over his shoulder in the direction of Buffy.

 

“Spike!” Buffy half expected him to reply. ‘Oh, wait, he’s not Spike yet.’ He continued to stare with narrowed eyes to the corner where she stood in all her ghostly glory. “William!” No response. “Damn, I was so sure he saw me.”

 

“Your boy seems lost, Dru,” Darla smirked. “He’s staring into space as if he’s as addled as you are.”

 

“Someone’s watching,” William muttered.

 

“We’re all watching,” Darla rolled her eyes. “None of us are seeing anything though unless Dru is seeing one of her fairies. Do you see them too?” Darla turned to Angelus. “You really shouldn’t let her turn anyone. They’re never right.”

 

“No. There is someone here. I can feel a tingle, “ William insisted. Surely they felt it as well. That feeling was there and it was strong. The feeling of being found wanting was stronger than ever. He began to wonder if he had it all wrong. Not the devil, maybe the Other. He had sinned, after all, taken life and more than once. Consumed it in full. “Is it God and judgment?” William remembered a phrase from the Bible, the book of Daniel he thought. ‘Mene, Mene, Tekel, Upharsin’. It was the writing on the wall in Babylon and the vicar had explained that it meant the king had been measured and found wanting. He felt just like that long ago king must have felt.

 

He looked at the others. They returned the look but it was clear they thought he was as mad as his Drusilla. “Can’t you feel it? We are watched.”

 

Angelus snorted. “It’s Queen Victoria peeking in her looking glass and askin’ who’s the fairest. Naturally, she spied yours truly,” he quipped. “Don’t be a git. I’d hate to have to dust Dru’s new toy for bein’ defective.”

 

William looked directly at the invisible Buffy and shivered. “Feels like judgment, damnation, death.”

 

Dru looked to the corner and began to whine. Then cocked her head and started to sway and sing a song about sunshine, destiny, and pixies that don’t belong.

 

“Great!” Darla let out an exasperated breath. “Just what we need. Another moron who sees pixies and has conversations with invisible people.” She ran her gaze over William lustfully. “Shame too. He’s a pretty one and,” she reached out to grope him, “well hung too.”

 

Angelus in a pique of jealousy snarled, “Can’t imagine this cockwomble knows what it's for save for a piss.”

 

William had jumped back from the encroaching hand and was eyeing the two vampires warily. They were moving in on him in a way that unnerved him more than anything that had happened thus far during this strange night.

 

“Well,” The blonde hussy said in an oily tone, “let’s teach him.”

 

“Oh, hell no,” Buffy yelled and looked desperately for a way out of the room.


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

 

William wiped at his tear-streaked face and rolled off the rumpled bed. The other two vampires were asleep and his Drusilla was cozied up with the dead couple on the sofa.

 

He had felt so strong. Clearly, he wasn’t as strong as the two monsters who had ripped his dignity, pride, and virginity from him, laughing all the while.

 

His princess had gibbered in the corner and talked of them breaking her toys. Begging them not to dust him.

 

William pulled himself together. There was no way he was going to spend his eternity with those two degenerates. His lovely Dru needed to be free of them as well.

 

Angelus and his whore didn’t stir as William went to the washstand and poured the slightly chilled water into the basin. He grabbed a towel from the stand and wetted it, wiping the blood from his body. ‘What I’d give to be able to call to have a proper bath drawn,’ William sighed. His body hurt but not nearly as bad as his spirit. He felt dirty and used and far beyond dejected.

 

‘Well, given I’m dead, I suppose parts of me should hurt.’ He wiped a particularly sensitive area and winced. ‘Not necessarily these parts though.’ Deep inside he knew his days of warm baths and loving servants had come to an end just as every other aspect of his life up to now.

 

Dru sidled up to him and whispered, “Daddy liked my knight. He didn’t even whip princess so taken was he,” she pouted.

 

William looked at her with pity. “I should think you glad of it, lass. Less pain for you.” William began to dress rapidly. He frowned as he saw the state of his trousers. They’d had him but he had not given in easily.

 

“Daddy always knows the very best ways to make it hurt,” Dru stared into space with a blank look. “Miss Edith has been naughty and shall have no supper tonight.”

 

William wondered where this other vampire was hiding. No doubt this Miss Edith had sense enough to stay clear of that sadist and his trollop.

 

Perhaps that was who he had been sensing ever since he clawed his way from his grave. This Miss Edith was quite good at keeping herself hidden. No doubt that would be a useful skill in this pack of animals.

 

“So do we go hunt now?” William felt a strong desire to warm his belly with that intoxicating feeling of life. Regain the feeling of power that had been stripped from him. It wasn’t so much hunger as it was a primal need. A siren’s song throbbing in the veins of a town filled with prey called to him beckoned insistently promising a return to the near euphoria he had felt before being introduced to the pair of debauched monsters still lying abed.

 

Dru put down the hairbrush she had been using and smiled at him. “Oh, yes! Daddy can never be angry if I feed the baby. Miss Edith shall dine tonight after all.”

 

Maybe he’d finally be introduced to his darling’s friend at last.

 

***

 

Buffy watched alternating between fascination and horror as Dru taught William how to choose a victim. She had to admit that Dru was a cunning and skilled hunter, careful in her selection of prey.

 

The woman appeared to be a prostitute and the man her customer. Both were in rough clothing and more than a bit drunk so it was a simple matter to steal up upon them and drain them dry.

 

There was no need to hide the bodies. It was unlikely anyone would report the pair and the alleyway looked like it was little used. Probably neither would be missed.

 

‘Still, someone loved them,’ Buffy reminded herself. She felt terrible being unable to protect the humans she had watched be murdered. It was small comfort knowing she was not the Chosen One for this time. She felt guilty for not wishing Spike dead too, for being glad to see that he wasn’t destroyed by all that had happened to him. She felt so conflicted!

 

William licked the blood from Dru’s chin then wiped the blood from his own with his finger. It was startling to Buffy that watching him put that blood-stained finger in Dru’s mouth and seeing her suckle it suggestively was as erotic as it was sickening.

 

William’s eyes had closed and his face had softened giving him a sensual and compelling look. Buffy couldn’t help but notice he was hard. ‘I must be one sick cookie to even be looking there,’ she chastised herself.

 

Buffy had managed to not watch what had happened between Angelus, Darla, and Spike earlier. She couldn’t block the sounds though. It was one thing to read about Angel’s life without the soul and quite another to see it in full living color.

 

***

William sat silently as Angelus had his way with Dru. Darla was off doing hell only knew what and William heartily wished he was far away as well. He was feeling the oppression of too many thoughts.

 

He was free now, more free than ever in his life really. He was strong and formidable too. None of the frilly cuffed bullies that had plagued his life before he was turned would recognize the man … well maybe not a man precisely … that he was becoming.

 

Still he couldn’t help but worry about his mother and the others who all had relied upon him for so many years. His father had raised him to always be a man of honor and he found that it still mattered to him. He was neglecting them all while revelling in this new freedom.

 

It didn’t help his mood that the lovely vampiress who had supposedly turned him to be her Knight, her paramour, couldn’t seem to welcome Angelus between her legs fast enough! ‘Know I’m not that experienced but she is supposed to be mine!’

 

The endless grunting finally ended and he heard the rustling of bed linens then clothing as the two rutting vampires finally tired of one another.

 

“My William is somber,” Dru sing-songed. “Did you miss your mummy?” She ran fingertips across the nape of his neck, her sharp nails drawing a thin red line that oozed a bit of borrowed blood.

 

“Always, precious,” William didn’t look at her. He couldn’t bring himself to give the words of endless devotion she was craving while she still reeked of the other vampire much less looked tousled and well used.

 

Angelus pranced about like the head rooster he fancied himself. He practically crowed. Nothing seemed to put him in a better mood than cuckolding the newcomer.

 

William had learned within the first couple of weeks that there was no hope in complaining and less in putting up a fight no matter which, Dru or William, caught the eye and fancy of one of the elder vampires. The more it was clear that William was unhappy with their “arrangements” the worse it became. Buffy found herself disgusted with the way Angelus and Darla treated the two they had created.

 

It seemed that pain was to be a constant companion to any slight pleasure with this group. They reveled in it. In truth they reveled in dishing it out. Darla loved her creature comforts and insisted upon being treated as if she were near royalty. Angelus clearly saw himself as a Master Artist and completely in charge of the group. No one went off on their own without his permission.

 

He had begun to taunt the newest member of the pack for his lack of interest in psychological torture of victims. William was prone to hunting and killing without any of Angelus’ “artistry”. It vexed him to no end that his protege had no desire to stretch out the suffering, to rape and torture. Oh, the boy would do it when ordered to do so but took no joy in it. Angelus was very disappointed.

 

Buffy watched William through each lesson feeling sick and horrified with each new step into the true Big Bad being taken. It was far easier to watch the kills when it was just Dru and William. They got right to the point. Hunt, attack, drain and kill then rinse and repeat if necessary. Usually those nights ended with William learning other skills, those in the bedroom.

 

“‘Tis off to find my Darla I am,” Angelus announced. “You two can find some way to amuse yourselves I’m sure.” He grinned wickedly then tweaked Dru’s nipple through her dress. “I’ve warmed her up for ‘ya, boy. Even Willie’s Willy can get the job done now that I’ve laid the fire.”

He laughed as he left the two in the silent hotel room.

 

“Don’t be greedy, my WIlliam. Daddy comes first, you know that.” Dru pouted.

 

“I understand the dynamics, Drusilla. They don’t make me happy but I understand them well.”

 

“Why so unhappy, my Knight?”

 

William blinked back the wetness in his eyes. “Thinking about my mother, Dru, my human mother.”

 

“You want to eat her?” Dru perked up. “Daddy says that’s the way it’s done. He and Grandmummy did my family before they made me but he feasted well on his.”

 

Buffy cringed. She’d forgotten...or rather done her best to never think about it. Angel had told her that all vampires killed their loved ones first thing. So far Spike hadn’t gone near anyone he knew as a human. She really didn’t want to see him destroy all those people he once cared about.

 

“Eat her?” William looked as horrified as Buffy felt. “God God, Dru!” He shook his head and reminded himself that she was more than a bit mad and her makers more than vicious. “No. I’m concerned. I was all she had and now she’s been abandoned and is unwell.”

 

“Not tasty when they’re sick,” Dru nodded as if understanding only that last part.

 

“It’s not fair. Here I am dead yet healthier and stronger than I’ve ever been in my life,” William mused. Buffy looked at his face and felt her blood go cold.

 

“No! No, no, oh NO Spike! Don’t do it.” Buffy looked at him in horror. The last thing she wanted to witness was Anne dying at the hand of her beloved son. She had thought it was sad that Anne was going to die alone before but this! This was far worse! Spike was forming a plan that she saw clearly on his face as he worked it through. Spike’s plan was like all of his plans since she met him. Bad with a side of terrible.

 

Still, she also understood on some level. ‘If my mom were sick I might think about it too.’ She shuddered than reminded herself, “But it’s wrong.”

 

Seeing the look on Spike’s face becoming more one of determination she sighed and felt tears well up. It was like watching a train wreck. She knew where this was going and she wanted off the train badly.

 

Buffy had a sudden thought that chilled her to the bone. “Where is Anne now? If Spike turned her, she has to be out there somewhere.” Buffy really didn’t want to ever have to stake her. She was glad that staking Spike was no longer a necessity thanks to that chip, but Anne would have no chip and if she ran into her there would be no excuse to let a dangerous vampire go free. “I hate this,” she raged at the Powers.

 

William smiled. It was a sweet smile for all that had triggered it. “Dru, my love, I have some loose ends to clear up. What do you say to an early dinner?”

 

*** 

Buffy was surprised to find the direction Spike took led to the docks and the firm’s office rather than the pretty house he had grown up in. ‘Maybe he’ll leave Anne alone after all,’ she hoped.

 

William had arranged to meet Dru in the general area where they had first met claiming he had some things to sort out.

 

And there he was, Buffy’s chubby tour guide from the start. George was diligently working away at the books. One of their older ships was due in soon and there was much to be done to prepare.

 

“Uncle George,” William startled the old gent.

 

“My boy! Where have you been? Your mother is beside herself with worry.”

 

“Yes, I imagine so. Terribly sorry. There is nothing to be concerned about as you can see. I’m fine.” William reassured his uncle. “I’ve found myself with a path to care for mother. Plans have taken some time but now it’s time to implement them.”

 

Buffy cringed and tried to steel herself for what was sure to come.

 

“You know that Doctor Gull has been advising that Mother be moved to someplace better for her health.” His uncle nodded and indicated that William should continue. “I have come across the very thing to improve her health but it will require our leaving our old life behind.”

 

“What is it you need me to do, William?”

 

His nephew smiled at him gratefully. Good old Uncle George, always there to lend a hand. For all his faults he was a good egg.

 

“I would appreciate it if you would arrange for our solicitor to meet us here on Friday. I wish to set up a trust that Mother and I can draw upon when needed. I will be placing you in charge of the operations of the business and ask that you arrange the sale of the house if you would be so kind. I will contact you, once we are settled, with our direction.”

 

George was torn between sadness at losing his beloved sister and nephew and pride that so much was being entrusted to him. “Of course. I did my best to serve your late father and am proud that you feel I am skilled enough to step in once more. Naturally when the time comes that you can return to London I’ll step down.”

 

William smiled enigmatically. “It’s unlikely that will occur, Uncle. This is likely a permanent situation I’m asking you to take. Indeed. I’d appreciate you selecting your successor when the time comes. I ask only that the proceeds from the sale of the house and a portion of the profits from the business be placed in the trust for our future use. I have the name of an investment firm that will be perfect for the purpose.”

 

Buffy blinked. ‘So that’s what he was doing snooping in Angelus’ papers the other day!’ she guessed. ‘Wonder what kind of investment firm works with demons?’

 

“I trust you to always see to the needs of our employees and hope that you have come to see the value in modernization,” William gave a half smile. He was proud of how he had handled things all those years. He hoped that somewhere, a place that he would never enter, his father was at least proud of him for that.

 

Buffy was shocked when William took his leave of his uncle with no attempt to even harm him much less drain him. ‘Huh?’ Maybe he wasn’t going to kill Anne after all.

 

She began to feel the apprehension again as they neared his home. This night William was a man on a mission and Buffy was confused trying to figure out what it was.

 

There was a slight rain yet they walked on not bothering to hail a hansom for their trip.

 

William felt strange rapping on his own front door but wasn’t sure if he could simply enter as he had before. One of the things he’d been taught was that vampires had to be invited in to personal residences. Angelus had schooled him in many ways to trick a victim into just that.

 

“Oh, Mister William, come in, come in! You must be soaked to the skin,” the kindly face of the housekeeper lit up as she stepped aside. “Gave me a start having a caller this late at night what with you having been away so long,” she looked at her master sidewise clearly hoping for some explanation for his absence. “Your mother will be so relieved to see you home. She’s abed, the poor lamb. She had a bad turn and the doctor sedated her and she’s finally getting a bit of rest. Do you wish me to have Nellie waken her?”

 

“No, Mrs. Burke, let her rest. I would appreciate you assembling the staff, however. I’ve news.”

 

***

 

They all began to file in, some in nightclothes.

 

“As you all know, mother has been unwell for quite some time.” There were looks of concern and nods of acknowledgement. “I’m certain you also know the recommendations of the doctor.”

 

Wide eyes looked back at him. They all were holding their breath waiting to hear just what news was so urgent that they were being given it so late in the evening.

 

“You have all served us brilliantly for many years. Mother and I have been fortunate in your loyalty,” Many an old eye misted at that praise. Truly they felt more family in many ways, some having watched the young master grow from the time he was a mere babe. “I won’t have you worry. Those of you of certain years will find sufficient pension to take care of your needs and Uncle George will be instructed to make certain you can address him with any unexpected need in the future.”

 

There was a gasp from a couple of the older retainers. “Are you turning us out, sir?”

 

“No. However the house is going to be closed up and sold. I have decided to improve mother’s health in the only way open to me.”

 

“You’ll be taking her to that place in Germany that Doctor Gull suggested?” Nellie guessed.

 

“Not certain if that will be the place but I don’t doubt Germany will be a place we’ll visit.”

 

Oh God, he WAS going to do it. He was going to turn Anne!

 

“The rest of you will be given a decent amount in severance pay and excellent references that should make it easy for you to find a good situation.”

 

“Master William, when will this happen,” Mrs. Burke inquired. There would be so much to do and she was a regular general when it came to organization.

 

William smiled at the old woman fondly, “You needn’t worry about the fuss. All our possessions will be packed up and stored by some of the warehouse workers. Uncle George will be given proper direction for where it will go.”

 

“So it’ll be soon then?” William couldn’t remember the name of the footman who asked as he was one of the newer employees.

 

“I’m not turning anyone out in the middle of the night,” William chuckled. “That said, it will be fast. Most of you should plan to pack and be ready to leave in a day or two. I shall, of course, make arrangement for you to have accomodation somewhere acceptable while you choose your place of retirement or find a new situation.”

 

Buffy kept expecting William to start a bloodbath and solve the issue that way. She couldn’t understand why this vampire was acting no differently than William had as a human. He was solicitous of the servants and considerate of their needs. He soothed their worries and helped them understand just what the future held for them. This was nothing like she had been led to believe was possible.

 

She was too lost in thought and confusion to pay much attention to the many conversations. She had noticed that William had slipped an item or two as a memento to the older staff members. Things to remember the Pratt family by.

 

Before she knew it they were on the move once again.

 

***

 

“Well, well, well. If it isn’t the missing poet,” The man’s voice grated. “I’m afraid there are no young ladies to torture here William. Strictly stag don’t you know.”

 

It was the jerk from the party, the one who had made such fun of William’s poem.

 

Buffy’s eyes widened as she saw the wicked smirk on the vampire’s face. “I’ve been thinking about you Lawrence. Given you lot a great deal of thought actually. Remembering your wish and so forth. Even prepared should our paths cross,” William moved silently closer.

 

Buffy noticed him reach into his pocket but couldn’t see just what he was reaching for until the spike was fully embedded in the skull of the man. “I seem to recall you expressed a desire for the business end of a railroad spike rather than another poem. Happy to oblige.”

 

Buffy watched as the man sank to the ground, dead almost immediately. She doubted he even had time to register that he was in danger much less about to be murdered.

 

*** 

Buffy watched the rest of that long night as Dru and William hunted down the whole gaggle of bullies putting the spike to use over and over again. Dru feasted on every corpse after that first one. William wouldn’t touch a one. “Won’t have their blood in me, darling. Nasty stuff.”

 

“What about the effulgent girl?” In all their hunt they hadn’t even tried to find Cecily.

 

“I think she’s left town. Still we might have the pleasure one day. Until then I have the delight in you, my love,” William pulled Dru to himself and kissed her soundly.

 

Dru was satiated by the time Spike extracted his revenge and thrown away the spike in disgust.

 

Spike, however had yet to feed and Buffy watched as that need was taken care of before they wove their way back to their lair. Dru was drunk on blood and mayhem and Spike was feeling more accomplished than he had ever felt in his life. Indeed, he had managed to get all his ducks in a row for good or ill and now it was time to finally, finally, take proper care of his beloved mother.

 

“Tomorrow I’ll introduce you to my mother, Drusilla. You must dress in your finest. Make a good first impression,” he suggested. “You’ll love her. She’s really a dear soul. She’ll take to you once the initial shock is over.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter End Notes:  
>  "What we once were informs all that we have become. The same love will infect our hearts – even if they no longer beat. Simple death won’t change that.” Darla to Angel, episode Prodigal (AtS S1). 
> 
> William was a caregiver. He took care of his mother. He took care of his household staff and employees. "Simple death won't change that." Liam cared for no one and death didn't change that either.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some dialogue taken from and/or adapted from “Lies My Parents Told Me” Written by David Fury and Drew Goddard

Chapter 11

 

Buffy let the tears flow freely in her grief over Anne’s death. She had been so trusting and William so tender. It was obvious to anyone who might have witnessed it that William was turning her in an act of love, not hate and not for a meal.

 

She hadn’t long to live anyway and those days would have been spent in grief, pain, and torment. Buffy could see why William thought his action was one of loving mercy. Still, she wept.

 

“We’ll take ‘er to my garden and she’ll grow to be a bright daisy, like you, my Knight,” Dru had suggested.

 

William’s brow furrowed as he translated his lady love’s comment. “No, Dru,” he answered as his eyes widened with understanding. “My mother will not face the terror of waking in a grave. Digging her way out in a panic,” he shivered at the recent memory.

 

“It’s ‘ow it’s always done,” she whined. Her lower lip stuck out in a pout that looked more petulant than cute.

 

“But is it necessary?” William looked troubled at the idea. “I mean will it not work if she were left abed instead?”

 

“Not ‘ave to but it’s tradition. Family seed in the ground deep, lovely flowers for mummy to reap,” she sing-songed. Dru did that sway dance that both compelled and repelled at the same time. “Mummy wants flowers.”

 

“If it isn’t essential, I’ll not have it.” William set his jaw firmly. “We’ll place her gently in her own bed and wait for her to waken to her new life.”

 

Dru whined like a child deprived of candy.

 

“Princess,” William used his deep warm voice to advantage as he sought to inveigle his sire to his way of thinking. “Perhaps we could hunt up some dinner while we wait to celebrate our new family?” Dru was always up for a bit of bloodsport.

 

It was going to be splendid! His mother could help him manage Dru and the three of them could travel the world! So much to see and enjoy and strength and power enough that none would gainsay them.

 

They would be a new family, unlike the filthy pair who ruled the pack that Dru had brought him into. None of the perversions. The torture and games would be at an end too. No devoting the eternity this change brought to the mere application of evil. ‘Let Angelus and Darla take their debauchery elsewhere.’

 

“We’ll be a new family, have Europe at our feet. Theater, concerts, galleries… only the best for my ladies,” William promised. He looked delighted at the prospect.

 

Dru looked less enamored of the idea. “And blood,” she sounded a bit worried that William didn’t have proper priorities. Maybe daddy was right and her handsome Knight wasn’t quite right.

 

He laughed. “Of course. Have to eat don’t we?”

 

Dru looked relieved.

 

William pulled Dru into his arms and gracefully twirled her around the parlor in a sensuous waltz. “And dancing! Mustn’t forget dancing. There will have to be plenty of dancing. God, I love to dance!”

 

Dru proved a graceful partner as they dipped and swirled to music only they could hear.

 

“And tender morsels bleeding rivers,” Dru added gleefully. William blinked and the dance stopped. His beloved was far too interested in the feeding portion of their future. He hoped that being away from the degenerate who had sired her would open up the world far more for her.

 

“I suppose. Seems a waste of blood to just make rivers of it though, don’t you think?”

 

“Daddy says it tastes ever so much better when you let them bleed and scream. Tears are like treacle, makes them so sweet and yummy.” Dru was caught up in her own dream, clearly different from the one William had just indulged in. “Such pretty screams. The little ones especially. Squeal like for Christmas pudding they do.”

 

William gazed at her as if trying to understand the appeal, he looked queasy. “Not much to feed on with children, Dru,” he tried to reason. “Better when they’re grown, yeah?” He really had no desire to feed on toddlers and infants when there were plenty of perfectly comely young ladies to satisfy any need for fun or feeding.

 

He had already discovered that finding dinner could be as easy as reciting a well-remembered verse and dropping hints with an indiscreet bit of flirtation. If he wanted a bit of sport with his meal he could always hunt down a cocky young lad looking for some fisticuffs, one prone to underestimating his opponent. William was well used to being underestimated.

 

“Daddy likes babies as much as ‘e does the Fathers and Sisters. Can taste the innocence. ‘E’s ‘appy for days when ‘e can corrupt the pure.” Dru looked with narrowed eyes toward the place where Buffy’s ghostly form stood listening in horror and disgust.

 

“Misplaced ghosties know that well. Make daddy perfectly ‘appy, she will.” Dru shook her head as if clearing it from cobwebs of visions she didn’t fully understand.

 

Buffy felt her skin crawl. Dru knew she was there! She had no doubt of that now. Dru also was seeing what was to come, what Buffy had unleashed, would unleash. Seeing a future Angel lose his soul for the love of her.

 

As if Dru also heard at last bits of Buffy’s thoughts the seer continued, “Not love. Just loves making the pure dirty.” Dru began to wring her hands and becoming increasingly distraught. “Poor princess is never clean.” She looked imploringly at William.

 

William looked increasingly confused by the turns his princess had taken.

 

“My William will bathe ‘is Wicked Plum in blood and punish ‘er just like daddy does, make ‘er clean,” she looked imploringly at her childe. “Miss Edith does deserve a caning, wicked she is.”

 

“Don’t have any plans to punish anyone, Dru,” he vowed thinking his promise would offer comfort.

 

Dru whined again more upset than before. “Must! Mummy ‘as to be made clean or Miss Edith will never come home.” She began to sob softly.

 

A confused William gathered her in his arms and tried to console her. He whispered words of love and adoration, promises of beautiful things to come if only she would trust her Knight to care for her as he yearned to do.

 

“You’ll see. Once we are free of them you’ll start to heal. I’ll be right there, dearest, never leave you.”

 

Buffy choked up a bit. He really hadn’t broken that promise. Dru had left him. She didn’t want all that William promised. She was too broken long before human William was out of diapers. William couldn’t see that, obviously. He saw a broken girl who had chosen him. He saw his first lover who had promised him a life unimagined before he had met her. He didn’t see the depth of control that Angelus would always have over his creation.

 

***

The pair of vampires had gone out for their dinner. Buffy had watched as William took the lead anticipating being the head of this new family he was forming.

 

Instead of a foundling house that was calling to Dru, he led her to the mews behind a popular Gentlemans club. This time of night the wasterals and affluent youths looking for mischief finished their drinking and gaming and began to make their way home. William enjoyed the look of growing horror and understanding when he let his demon come forth. The smell of piss was a bit off-putting when the fear set in but William was careful, now, to stop breathing as he fed.

 

As awful as it was watching people die and not being able to stop it, Buffy was beginning to notice subtle differences between the vampires of this group. Angelus was a sadist who had a particular interest in young girls and the clergy. He sometimes liked to snatch brides while they were still virgins and steal them from the night of love they had been expecting and substituting one of horror.

 

Darla was cold and impersonal. She liked her creature comforts and often her choice of victim was calculating. She preferred to hunt and kill those who brought more than just blood to the table. She liked to acquire nice things, clothing, jewelry and the like. They lived in luxury thanks to her choices more often than not.

 

Drusilla was a puzzle. She was drawn to children even infants but it was almost like watching someone with two opposing impulses. On one hand, she seemed to want to cuddle, comfort and play with them, her manner nearly motherly and nurturing. Then before the child could know there was any danger at all the demon would come out and she would devour them as if they meant nothing to her. All too often she would dissolve into tears afterward wondering why her precious little blossom was cold and lifeless. “All my littlest flowers die, William,” she would mourn. It was always easier for her when the meal was at least a teenager or older.

 

Then there was William. Buffy was at a loss to process what she saw with how William behaved as a vampire. Without a doubt, he was a cold killer. Still, there seemed to be some elements of the human she had come to know and like that were still there. Surely that couldn’t be right, could it? Still, she saw what she saw.

 

He was fine with hunting and killing but preferred to target prey that had something of a chance if they used their brains or skills. He watched Angelus create his “art” unflinchingly yet had no interest in torture himself unless forced into it. Same with rape. Then there was the issue of his mother.

 

Unlike Angel’s story about how all vampires go back and kill their families out of bloodlust and hatred, William had turned his mother from love and a desire to see her suffering end.

 

Buffy wasn’t sure what to think about what she was seeing completely but one thing was crystal clear… not all vampires were the same.

 

***

“Soon my dark warrior,” Dru announced abruptly. She was evidently able to sense that William’s childe was about to rise.

 

“She’ll be famished,” William worried. He remembered the man that Dru had provided for his first meal after he escaped his grave.

 

“Should’ve left the ‘elp to ‘elp,” Dru chided him. She had been highly annoyed to find that there were no servants left in this fine house when William took her there to turn his mother.

 

The last of them had taken their leave hours before thinking Mister William would be bundling his frail mother off to a clinic somewhere far away. They had raised many an eyebrow at the woman in black who had accompanied the master that evening. His choice in companion for his ailing mother looked a bit too pale herself for the position and her avid gaze unnerved them as well.

 

William sighed. He had already born the brunt of Dru’s anger over his choice days before. “Can’t eat the staff, they’re family,” he once more explained. It was clear from Dru’s face that he might as well be explaining physics to a mouse.

 

“Dru… beloved…,” his voice was cajoling, “would you be a dear and go bring a proper meal home for mother? I don’t want her to wake up alone and afraid.”

 

Dru huffed. “Not a kitchen maid, I’m a princess. Meals are brought to me.” She looked at William’s soft face and caved. “Very well. Just this once,” and she headed out the door leaving William alone to wait for his mother to rise.

 

Buffy wondered if she would recognize Anne as easily as she did William after the change.

 

*** 

Anne entered the parlor still wearing her night-rail and carrying a music box. William was delighted to see her looking so strong, he referred to her as glowing.

 

“Am I? Well, I suppose I have you to thank for that don’t I?” Anne shut the music box cutting it off mid-tune. “However will I repay you?”

 

Buffy felt her skin prickle. There was something very “off” about Anne Pratt. There was nothing of the warmth she exuded before. Nothing of the love in her eyes as she gazed on her son.

 

“This is how it should be mother. You and I together. All of London laid out before us.” All William could see was his mother and the long life he had been dreaming of during the days he waited for her rising.

 

“Ah yes… us.”

William didn’t heat the cutting tone in her voice as he continued to lay out his plans. “First we’ll feast. Then the night is yours. Theater perhaps? Dancing? Tell me, what’s your pleasure?”

 

Buffy had a feeling her pleasure would be more in line with Angelus than William and she held her breath waiting for her answer.

 

“Pleasure? Why my pleasure is to take my leave of you, of course.” William looked as if he had been physically sticken. “The lark hath spake from twixt its wee beak?” she mocked one of Williams many odes to the long forgotten Cecily. “You honestly thought I could bear an eternity listening to that twaddle?”

 

William backed away from her a look of hurt confusion on his face. It was one thing to have his poetic efforts made sport of by the louts he had encountered for years but his mother had always encouraged his efforts.

 

“I feel extraordinary,” She smiled for the first time but the smile was a cruel one. “It’s as though I’ve been given new eyes. I see everything. Understand… everything.” Her eyes flashed as they turned on William.

 

“I hate to be cruel.” She hesitated then her smile brightened and showed actual enjoyment. “No, I don’t. I used to hate to be cruel in life. Now, I find it rather freeing. Nothing less will pry your greedy little fingers off my apron strings, will it?”

 

William couldn’t look at her, couldn’t be near her. It was all going to hell just as he was certain he would one day. He had anticipated it being a long way in the future and certainly not instigated by his own beloved mother!

 

“Ever since the day you first slithered from me like a parasite…”

 

Buffy cringed and wished she could somehow protect William from the venum directed at him so cruelly.

 

“Had I known better, I could have spared myself a lifetime of tedium and just dashed your brains out when I first saw you.”

 

God, this was worse than watching Angelus and Darla torture and rape the newborn William. It was obvious that Buffy wasn’t the only one who would say that. Still the verbal stakes continued to fly.

 

“God, I prayed you’d find a woman to release me, but you scarcely showed an interest. Who could compare to your doddering housebound mum? A captive audience for your witless prattle.”

 

That wasn’t right! Buffy had watched the family dynamic between Anne and William and it had never been THAT. They had doted on one another mutually but as a son and mother. Yes, William had put his mother’s needs and wants first. He’d nearly had a breakdown trying to give her what she wanted and needed. He’d selected a woman based on his mother’s sensibilities more than his own attractions. He’d never once been other than a loving son. He’d only read the poetry to her because Anne had insisted on it!

 

William had been steadily backing away from his advancing mother, or the demon in his mother’s body because no way in hell was this Anne Pratt. It was obvious that William didn’t see this distinction, however. Thinking his mother had never loved him, had misunderstood his love for her, was gutting him.

 

“You want to run don’t you? Scamper off and cry to your new little trollop. Do you think you’ll be able to love her? Think you’ll be able to touch her without feeling me? All you ever wanted was back inside. You finally got your wish, didn’t you? Sank your teeth into me. An eternal kiss.” The whole time the new vampire was spewing the filth she was moving closer and closer to William.

 

William looked panicked and horrified. His eyes darted around looking for a way to escape. He had to get away. He had to make her understand. He had to make her be herself again but had no clue how. Maybe he should have put her in the grave as Dru had wished, maybe it was a necessary ingredient. “I only wanted to make you well.”

 

“You wanted your hands on me. Perhaps you’d like a chance to finish off what you started.” Anne had invaded William’s space and reached to touch his chest as he recoiled and pushed away from her. 

 

“I love you. I did. Not like this.”

 

“Just like this! This is what you always wanted.” She suggested with a leer. “Who’s my dark little prince?” She leaned in to kiss him in a highly improper way.

 

William shoved her away, knocking her to the floor then grabbed his mother’s cane as she swung it at him in the fray. Anne’s demon face was out as she continued to mock and taunt William. The cane broke in half and William plunged one end into his mother’s heart, his eyes wild and filled with shock. “I’m so sorry.”

 

Buffy’s heart broke seeing what William had to do. She watched as he slid down the wall and began to sob.

 

*** 

William was still sitting in shock, tears streaking his face and his eyes fixed on the pile of ashes that had once been his beloved mother when Dru arrived with an unconscious girl in tow.

 

Dru took in the scene and could feel that something had gone terribly wrong. “Wot happened?” She looked at the pile of dust and her desolate childe with sincere sympathy.

 

“She wasn’t herself. She … couldn’t be herself…” His voice trailed off as he tried to cling to that possibility. Surely his mother hadn’t meant those word!

 

Dru actually looked relieved. Perhaps she hadn’t wanted to share William’s affections in any form. “Flowers often die, my William, specially the sick ones.”

 

Spike’s jaw tightened. “She didn’t die! I killed her!” he choked out, voice rising. “Twice, Oh God, what have I done?”

 

He looked in Buffy’s direction, that ever-present judging angel he had been feeling from the time he first embraced the demon within him. He could just imagine the reaction to the damning scene it had just watched. “There! Bring the judgment. Matricide should earn me a special place in one of the lower levels of hell. Do what you’re here to do and drag me off already.”

 

Buffy knew that William was talking directly to her. He seemed to think she was some agent of heaven there to see his sins and punish him. ‘Guess that is my usual job description. Slay evil. Punish demons.’ Funny how all she really wanted to do right now was comfort him, ease his

pain. Dru wasn’t willing or able to offer either and he so desperately needed it.

 

“Poor boy, you still have the mummy that counts,” Dru cooed in at least an effort.

 

Her words didn’t sooth William’s broken spirit at all.

 

*** 

Buffy was starting to wonder how much liquor a vampire could consume before they finally passed out.

 

William had gone through every drop in the house even draining Cook’s sherry. In all this time Buffy had never seen William drink like this. Yeah, she’d seen Spike three sheets to the wind but never William. He might have a glass of brandy or port after a meal or wine with his food but this was different. ‘Man, he’d empty a liquor store and then all the 7-Eleven’s in Sunnydale at this rate!”

 

Dru had long since drained the girl she’d brought back with her and was impatient to leave. She’d been fretting about making her precious daddy wonder where they were after all these days.

 

William was completely disheveled. He looked wild and raw as he never had before even just after his turning. “Think we’ll drop by an Inn or two on the way back.” He held the bottle he had just finished upside-down and frowned. “Need more. Thought we had more here. Have to speak to the staff about that.”

 

He seemed to recollect he had no staff any longer and giggled.

 

“Maybe you were right, sweetheart. I shouldn’t have let them all go just yet. Not even sure where they procure the alcohol,” he mused. He fumbled through the drawer of his desk, rifling through receipts. “Must have a clue here somewhere. Know I pay them proper.”

 

“Daddy will know ‘ow best to get more,” Dru coaxed. She just wanted to go home where things made sense again. This boy of hers was confusing, not like Angelus and Darla. “Come with mummy and daddy will make it all right again.”

 

“It’ll never be right again,” William blinked back more tears but let Dru lead him from his former home to the new life that had just changed once again and just as unexpectedly.

 

***

 

Three inns, more alcohol than Buffy had ever seen consumed and two really terrifying angry mobs later and Dru finally managed to get William home.

 

Angel was less than pleased.


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some dialogue taken or adapted from Fool For Love written by Douglas Petrie

Chapter 12

 

Dru was the one to tell the tale in the end. William had finally passed out in the corner soon after they arrived back at the lair. For once even Angelus made sense of what Dru had to say as she had been close to lucid. Seems keeping her boy alive made her step up and she managed it.

 

Darla had positively cackled at the thought of William siring his mother in order to have her with him and make a new family. At least he hadn’t planned on just bringing the Old Biddy into their fold. What possible use could William have thought they would have for that Darla was at a loss to imagine. She rolled as gales of laughter spilled out.

 

Angelus failed to see the humor. Here was this newly turned idiot going off not only making new vampires, badly, but planning to branch off and take Dru with him! At best it was impertinent and overreaching. The moron hadn’t even learned the ropes himself yet had thought to add to their number without asking. “Think you’re the little Prince do you?” He kicked the unconscious vampire in the ribs hard enough to break a couple.

 

Darla tried to catch her breath to talk. “Better teach this one quickly if he plans to head out on his own,” she suggested before returning to the laughter.

 

Dru looked from one to the other and began to wonder if it would have been better to have kept certain details about their last few days to herself. Miss Edith had tried to tell her.

 

“Even the lost girl feels bad for ‘im,” Dru lamented. “Grandmummy and daddy are mean and the shadow doesn’t approve.”

 

Angelus’ mood worsened as Dru rambled on. Honestly, she and Willie had been spooking him and Darla with their talk of ghosts and angels of judgment. The only Angel around here was him, by god! They were all feeling weird tingles, Angel chalked it up to the nonsense Dru was spouting. No way was there some fairy or mythical creature spying on his family without his knowing it!

 

***

 

Buffy’s head reeled and her heart broke as the weeks turned into months and Angel made good on his threats, with Darla egging him, on to be certain that William was “well-trained”.

 

That was bad enough to watch but seeing the results of the lessons that involved the innocent population made the Slayer side of her physically ache.

 

The Whirlwind was cutting a swath of destruction through London and surrounding areas. They went on the move never staying long enough to actually nest. The longer that was the case the more annoyed Darla became. She liked her creature comforts and not knowing where they would rest was starting to chafe. Mostly she blamed William.

 

He had continued his behavior of engaging mobs in brawls that easily got out of hand. No sure victories, no sensible, stealthy, caution. Worst of all it was causing her beautiful boy to take risks of his own so as to not appear less deadly. As much as Angelus was teaching William the ways of a vampire, William was drawing out a jealousy-induced competition in Angelus! They needed to dial it back before things got too hot.

 

“I’m tired of London. I hear Brighton is popular with the upper class, why don’t we change the scenery for a bit and see whose suite we can appropriate at the Grand Hotel?” Darla was ready for some indulgence. “Maybe there will be a performance worth seeing at the Hippodrome.”

 

She sidled up to Angelus and ran her hands over him in a way that had always worked to get her way. “We’ve been spending far too much time in the areas of London that positively reek of late. I’m sure Drusilla would love a new wardrobe that doesn’t smell of day-old meat pies.”

 

Dru tried to give herself a discreet sniff but detected no such thing. Still, a new wardrobe would be nice. “Ooo, princess would love new pretties!” She smiled at William and batted her eyes. “Brighton will ‘ave lots of pretty little girls in pretty dresses just right for mummy!”

 

The only thing beyond fist and fangs that William cared about any longer was his dark beloved. If moving from London would give her joy then he was sure he could find plenty to fill his own desires there as well. “If that’s what you want, poodle, then you shall have all the dresses you would want.” He kissed her neck and whispered, “Drape you in jewels too, rubies like blood drops and obsidian to match your eyes.”

 

Dru was already twirling in excitement, “Do you think yellow will make me look sallow?”

 

“‘Course not. You look good in anything,” William narrowed his eyes, “and best of all in nothing.”

 

Buffy had noted that William had begun to change in small but obvious ways. His proper pronunciation and vocabulary had shrunk. It was a conscious effort on his part. Buffy had noted him correct himself more than once as he tried to lose the educated, upper-class refinement that his mother had drilled into him. He had changed his appearance as well looking more and more like the street ruffian that the Council had claimed was the human background of William the Bloody.

 

She had watched him put on this new personae in the same way that Dru put on her makeup and clothing. He was re-creating himself and becoming someone she recognized as the Spike she had met once behind the Bronze. All he was lacking was the swagger and the coat. The difference was that now she could still see William right there. ‘He never really went away, just put on a costume. Like an evil Batman.’

 

***

Brighton had lasted a month before William’s regular incitement of riots began to draw attention once again. They moved from place to place, cities becoming smaller as they went making it harder to stay in hiding. Small towns made newcomers stand out too easily.

 

From Brighton to Bristol (to stay away from London where they might be more easily spotted), then Birmingham to Manchester. At this rate, they were running out of England altogether.

 

“Leeds,” Angelus insisted. 

 

Leeds had been fine until William discovered the favorite public houses for the miners and lower classes and once more began to stir up the locals.

 

Buffy knew that Spike loved to fight and was good at it but ever since Anne’s double death she had watched him enter into these melees with more zeal than skill. Usually, he was more than a bit worse for the wear too which put him in more jeopardy than if he had his wits about him. The other three often got pulled into his messes if only to prevent William from being dusted. Angelus was all for letting that happen but Dru became too distressed when he suggested it.

 

As often as Buffy had called Spike an idiot she knew full well he wasn’t. He was impulsive and impatient but really quite clever and a great reader of people. As she watched everything that was happening with him she finally had to conclude that there was at least a small part of William that was flirting with final death. Some part of him that never really left the horror of his last encounter with Anne appeared to want to dust.

 

Even if that were true there was still the stronger part of him that was too stubborn to just give up. Too much that remained of William that found suicide still too much of a taboo. Too much stubbornness of his demonic nature to let even a crowd of humans get the better of him. So he lived on.

 

William refused to knuckle under to Angelus either. He took the torture. He took the assaults. He didn’t take them silently either. That sharp tongue and quick wit that Buffy knew well was being honed on his elders every day. If not for Dru, Angelus would have dusted him long since.

 

Then again Angelus learned that if he really wanted power over the young upstart all he really had to do was threaten Drusilla. That was William’s Achilles Heal. When William hurt, he bore it well, often making a sarcastic joke of it. When Dru was hurt, William would do or say anything to make her hurting stop.

 

Buffy was astonished at the amount of self-sacrifice William was willing to suffer for Dru. There was no way to deny that he genuinely loved her or that he was capable of the full range of human emotions. ‘So much for what Angel and Giles told me.’ There was no way she would ever be blind to the obvious again where Spike was concerned provided she ever got back to her normal life!

 

Mobs and the “tender mercies” of Angelus and Darla were neither enough to end the existence of William the Bloody and Buffy found herself glad for whatever it was that made him carry on.

 

*** 

 

Angelus had had enough! He was tired. Tired of pulling William out of harm's way. Tired of being on the run constantly. Tired of Darla’s constant bitching about their lack of luxury. Tired of William in general.

 

They had crisscrossed bloody England just keeping ahead of the natives with the pitchforks and now they were stuck in a fricking coal mine in the wilds of Yorkshire. A played out mine at that so no convenient miners to dine on which mean forays into the countryside for a meal.

 

“Ya’ bloody maggot!” Angelus roared after another of Darla’s tirades. “Why ya’ canna learn ta respect the art form, learn ta lay low …” Angelus was furious enough that he was slipping a bit into his long rejected Irish accent. He took deep breaths and tried to regain control of himself and the situation.

 

“Rather a bloody maggot than a pigeon-livered meater like you,” William retorted and preened a bit. He loved to imply that the great Angelus was a bit of a coward.

 

Angelus reached out and grabbed William by the throat seriously throttling him. “Perhaps it’s my advancing years that makes me so forgetful, William. Remind me why don’t we kill you?”

 

William tried to croak out an answer but couldn’t make himself understood with the pressure on his neck.

 

“What’s that?” Angelus released William and thrust him away from him in disgust.

 

“It's Spike now.” William stood and straightened his clothing. “You’d do well to remember it, mate.”

 

“I'm not your mate. And when did you start talking like that?”

 

Darla’d had enough. “We barely got out of London alive because of you! Everywhere we go it’s the same story and now…”

 

Angelus finished for her, “You’ve got me and my women hiding in the luxury of a mine shaft all because William the Bloody likes the attention. This is not a reputation we need.”

William merely took another gulp from his bottle. “Oh, I’m sorry. Did I sully our good name?” He looked at the others, “We’re vampires!”

 

Darla rolled her eyes and Angelus gritted his teeth. “All the more reason to use a certain amount of finesse.”

 

“Bollocks! That stuff's for the frilly cuffs-and-collars crowd. I'll take a good brawl any day.”

 

“And every time you do, we become the hunted.”

Drusilla whispered excitedly to Darla, “The King of Cups expects a picnic! But this is not ‘is birthday.”

William, now Spike, was not cowed in the least. “You know what I prefer to being hunted? Getting caught.”

 

‘Yup, there it is,’ Buffy nodded. ‘He’s trying to be punished for Anne or maybe more than that.’

 

“That's a brilliant strategy really... pure cunning.” Angelus was at his wits end.

“Sod off!” he laughed. “Come on. When was the last time you unleashed it? All out fight in a mob, back against the wall, nothing but fists and fangs? Don't you ever get tired of fights you know you're going to win?”

 

“No. A real kill. A good kill. It takes pure artistry. Without that, we're just animals.”

“Poofter!” Spike took another drink. “You have your art, I have my skill.” He shrugged. He looked at the women and continued. “Just because Angelus won’t take on anyone who might just have a chance doesn’t mean I have to be that way. Where’s the fun in that?”

 

“It’s not a game you idiot! Evil is an art and you are no artist.”

 

“Where is the art in stalking little girls or rapin’ virgins? Torturing them till they beg to die? I’m not a sadist or rapist. I’m a warrior and a damned good one.” Spike turned his back on Angelus with disregard. “Keep your so-called art, ya’ poof.”

 

Angelus shoved Spike and the two began to brawl. Angelus grabbed a rod and raised the makeshift weapon started to plunge it into Spike. The younger vampire grabbed it just an inch or so from his heart and smirked up at his grand-sire. “Now you’re gettin’ it.”

 

Angelus dropped the rod and moved away angry with himself for having lost control to the young upstart. The boy knew how to punch his buttons.

“You can't keep this up forever. If I can't teach you, maybe someday an angry crowd will.” Angelus was pretty well ready to let that happen no matter how much whining would result from Dru. “That... or the Slayer.”

 

William sat up looking interested in what Angelus had to say for the first time. “What’s a Slayer?”


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N with two exceptions in this chapter (and throughout the story) all the Slayers that get a mention are either from the comics or the Tales of the Slayer book series with alterations as needed for my story unless noted otherwise. The current (1880) Slayer is my own creation as there wasn’t one listed anywhere for that time period in canon. The same for 1890 in St. Petersburg.
> 
> Also a tiny bit of dialogue from Amends written by Joss Whedon

Chapter 13

 

Spike had wanted to hunt down this Slayer immediately. Finally, a REAL challenge!

 

Angelus realized he finally had made a monster, just not the sort he’d wanted.

 

“Look, you idiot, a Slayer is the one being guaranteed to dust your sorry ass. You don’t seek her out, you find out where she is and make sure you are elsewhere,” Darla huffed.

 

“So you’ve never met one?”

 

“We came close in Ulster back a decade ago or so,” Angelus admitted. “That’s the reason we came to London.”

 

“Tell me about her,” Spike asked avidly.

 

“Not much to tell. Her name was Catherine Callan and she was deadly. Then she was dead.”

 

“So no more Slayer then,” Spike sounded disappointed.

 

“No. When one dies another girl gets called,” Darla shook her head at his ignorance. “What, you think the Chosen One dies and that’s it? Game over, bad guys win?”

 

“So the Slayer is in Ireland?”

 

“No, you moron, the Callan bitch was in Ireland. The current Slayer is somewhere in South Africa I think. Probably some demonic influence causing the war there. I heard a rumor that a minor Hellmouth opened up just about the time that started.”

 

“So the Slayer goes where there are wars?” William wondered fleetingly if his father had encountered one during his hellish years in Crimea.

 

Buffy was a bit amused listening to the vampires and their theories about Slayers.

 

Actually, she wondered a bit about just how and why the lucky girl got the winning ticket to the early death lottery. She had assumed she was called because the need was there at the Hellmouth in Sunnydale but as far as she knew there was no Hellmouth in Ireland. ‘Maybe it’s random?’ After all there were demons everywhere. “But then I’m all Prophecy Girl so I guess I’m a special snowflake.”

 

***

Buffy watched the ever-growing obsession as it took root in the young vampire. She could see it on his face. ‘I never noticed how expressive Spike’s face still is! You can read his thoughts and feelings so easily just by looking.” It didn’t even surprise her that she no longer had any doubt that vampires did have feelings and this one seemed to have the full range of them and they were strong.

 

Yeah, that was obsession. He looked like a door to door religious person who just got invited in to share their version of truth with a side of cookies and tea.

 

“I’m sayin’ no Boyo. Ya’ daft bugger!” Angelus was growing ever more impatient with Spike and his desire to find the current Slayer to test his skills against the best. “Ta take a Slayer requires more finesse than you'll ever have. Most fall to pure luck, a few to a clever trick. More than a few from their own Council when they’re eighteen and a handful. Ya might have a chance with enough minions to distract her… or ya might catch one soon after they’re called and have no skills ta speak of.”

 

“Listen to Angelus, you twit,” Darla was all for getting rid of Dru’s defective pet and saying good riddance. She’d become more vocal on that issue every day.

 

The one benefit to Spike from all of Darla’s comments was that Dru had become more unhinged at the idea of her pretty Knight being dusted. The more scattered Dru’s wits, the more the need for Spike’s stabilizing effect on her grew obvious. It’s what spared him a quick dusting.

 

Her ranting had finally clued Spike in to the fact that this Edith bint wasn’t another vampire laying low, but one of Dru’s’ pieces’, maybe the part of her that had her human traits? He knew that Darla and Angelus had just chalked it up as one of Dru’s fairy voices that resided in her dolls. Spike knew better. It was always Miss Edith being punished, always Miss Edith that whispered secrets in Dru’s lovely ear. Miss Edith was that wee voice within, the one who hated the lives they were living as demons. Darla and Angelus saw nothing, understood nothing and felt nothing.

 

Like right now. Angelus and his attitude about pitting his skills against a worthy opponent showed he had no real courage for all his bravado. Slayers scared him. Having the possibility of losing a fight was unthinkable and so he avoided the situation. He was all mouth and no trousers.

 

“No honor or challenge in any of that,” Spike was speaking to Angelus. He did his best to ignore Darla at all times. “Want to fight the best, mano y mano That would be something to be proud of.”

 

Angelus bristled, “Ya callin’ me a coward boy?”

 

Darla rolled her eyes and laid her hand on Angelus’ arm “Let the moron try it, save us having to end him.”

 

This led to another fight, another “lesson” from the elder vampire given to the over-eager youth.

 

Buffy groaned in sympathy with every blow that landed. Angelus was right. At this point, William would be ashtray fodder if he got his wish and met a Slayer, even a fairly new one. They usually had training at least to back up the new power unlike what happened to her. If Buffy didn’t know that Spike was still around another century she might have been a bit worried.

 

***

For the next couple of years, Buffy watched as Spike developed a bit of an intelligence network among some of the lesser demons trying to locate and identify the Slayer. Angelus tried to explain that vampires didn’t mix with other demons but Spike was having none of that. “Not going to ignore a good resource just because some tradition likes to divide us up.”

 

He had also managed to get hold of books from time to time, learning as much as possible about Slayers and the known Slayer Lore. Somehow he even had a copy of the Slayer’s handbook, he laughed himself into a coughing fit over some of the things in that one.

 

Spike had promised to behave himself and not draw attention if they could head back to London. Buffy knew his real intention was to seek out information from the Council’s resources but Darla was on board with the idea simply to get back to “civilization” once again. She was not a country girl at heart.

 

They were on the outskirts of London in a private country house. The trappings were lavish and Darla was in her element. How Angelus had managed to charm an invitation had been interesting to Buffy. Those puppy eyes worked for more than charming young girls it seemed. The lady of the house found the Irishman and his “wife” fascinating with all their stories of their travels. Just the sort of guests guaranteed to liven up a dull house party. William had been introduced as Darla’s younger brother recently married to the fey Drusilla.

 

They were blending in with the other guests nicely. Angelus made it clear they were to bide their time until the full complement of guests had arrived before massacring all at their leisure. It would be much easier to slip away with none to give a report or discover the deed for a while if they played it according to plan.

 

Even without bloodshed, Angelus had been busily seducing the staff. Buffy noticed that his caddish, crass, behavior didn’t stick out at all. His groping the help didn’t even raise a brow. Lots of the men seemed to think that the servants were fair game. Females in general were easy prey but the “lower orders” even more so.

 

‘Love to show you some girl power,’ Buffy fumed as she watched yet another young girl cry at the rejection that followed her deflowering. She still tried to ignore the voice inside her that tried to point out some clear similarities she had with these girls. Angelus didn’t leave them dead, but he left them broken.

 

It was strange but he looked so much older than he had when Buffy met him in 1997 even though it was a century and change earlier in time. He had a mustache and his long hair was straight and slicked back from his forehead. He had Elvis sideburns! In fact, he looked like he should be in a movie like Interview With a Vampire, he would fit right in! Buffy would have suspected him right away if he had looked like that when they first met even if he wasn’t wearing the fancy clothes of the late 1800’s.

 

Buffy watched as her first lover played the man of mystery. For the upper servants he used seduction. He’d pay compliments and give small gifts to the young girls. Flatter them that they had captured his interest through their pure, gentle hearts. As soon as he bedded them he moved on immediately. Buffy supposed they were lucky he didn’t disobey his own orders and drain them.

 

Watching Angelus work his way through the servant women was creepy. At first, she tried to deny what she was seeing and hearing. It was just like his courtship of her! All the things he had said and done that made her feel so special had been nothing more than a practiced seduction formula that he’d spent a couple of centuries perfecting. ‘Did he mean any of it?’ It was clear he didn’t mean a bit of it with the girls he left debauched and broken. ‘Left’ was a key element too, he never stuck around once he got what he wanted from them. Buffy shivered.

 

One serving girl resisted all his advances. Her name was Margaret and she had become Angelus’ particular target. He might flee from a fair fight that involved fists and fangs but when it came to seduction he merely became angry and more determined with each rejection.

 

Buffy watched and remembered seeing this scene play out once before. That horrible visit from the First Evil when Angel had nearly killed himself had caused Buffy to see several things from his past that she had determinedly put out of her mind or rationalized since then.

 

He had the reluctant serving woman backed into a corner and this time threatened to kill her son if she didn’t let him have his way with her. He went so far as to show his game face. “Ah! Cry out. Call for help. I'm sure Mistress will believe your behavior beyond reproach. Too bad darlin’. Could’ve taken my time but we don’t want to alarm the others now do we?”

 

The woman quaked in fear. “Sir! My son!”

Angelus leaned in and plunged his fangs into the woman’s neck, “Oh, he'll make a fine dessert, huh?” Evidently the full complement of guests had arrived or perhaps Angelus had lost his last bit of patience.

 

This time Buffy didn’t feel the sympathy for the devil that she had that Christmas when she had shared his dream. She had seen so much more with this weird voodoo that had her trapped in the past that all of her patience for Angelus’ evil had been exhausted. Just as she clearly saw William in Spike she was now seeing Angelus in Angel. She was shaken.

 

*** 

By the time Spike cultivated an informant in London, there had been a rapid succession of Slayers, all in faraway places. He was getting impatient to try his skills against such a legendary opponent.

 

The last two Slayers had been in the United States! There was no way his Sire and his whore would make the long crossing chasing Spike’s white whale. The United States was vast in size and even if they had tried to get there in time it wasn’t likely they could have found the Prater girl in Kentucky or her successor all the way in Dodge City, Kansas before some demon had a really fine day.

 

Spike would have loved to give that last one a go. Something about the wild west called to him and that Slayer, Belle Malone, sounded like she could have been in the cast of The Buffalo Bill Wild West show that had so captivated him when they had attended just that year as part of the American Exhibition of 1887 in London.

 

London had been filled with amusements to coincide with Victoria’s Golden Jubilee. The quartet of vampires had stayed in the capital enjoying the entertainments and dining on all the many tourists in town for the same.

 

***

“I’m tellin’ ya it’s not Penn. No crosses on the cheek for one thing.”

 

Angelus and Darla had been arguing for weeks as body after body was discovered in Whitechapel. “Besides, the boy likes to focus his art on families not prostitutes.”

 

“My beautiful boy,” Darla caressed Angelus’ face, “you did train him well.” She turned a gimlet eye on Spike. “Unlike others who we won’t mention lest Dru set off again. I swear her fits and starts are driving me as mad as she is.”

“Seems ever since she made her little toy I get the oddest feeling from time to time. Like spiders crawling on me.” Darla shuddered. “Wish you’d just exterminate the pest!” She glared at Dru who was staring into space and muttering to herself.

 

“Slash and rip. From ‘ell ‘e says. Makes all the Yardsmen nervous,” Dru nodded in agreement to who knows who.

 

“I, for one, think whoever the killer is is nothing but a butcher. There’s no point in the brutality.” William folded the newspaper and set it aside. “Those girls are used to danger so there’s hardly any point to trying to stoke up more terror and bad treatment. I don’t see the point of it.”

 

“Come now, boyo, surely you can appreciate the taste of fear in the air.”

 

“Get plenty of fear when I grab my own dinner and drain them. Never had a lack yet. No need to get the whole city in an uproar. Can’t dine on the fear in the air.”

 

“Well I still think it’s your boy Penn. We haven’t seen him since before you turned Dru. It would be like him to try to get his daddy’s attention in such a public way.” Darla shrugged. “His idea of a love letter to the family I imagine.”

 

Buffy hoped she wouldn’t have to meet this vicious vampire while on this weird vacation to Pride and Prejudice, Vamp style. This Penn sounded like exactly what Angelus had tried to turn Spike into only it worked with the older vamp. It was hard enough to see the ones she did know at their worst.

 

Buffy was just glad that none of these four were the killer known as Jack the Ripper. She had started to worry about that from the time the murders started happening. She’d been pretty sure it wasn’t Spike since she usually was right there where he was but it wasn’t outside the realm of possibility that Angelus was making some sort of statement since he and Darla had been arguing and she had been a prostitute in her human life. What better way to lash out at her than through a surrogate victim?

 

“All it’s done is put people on their guard. Made it more dangerous for us,” Spike pointed out. “You used to beat me for far less mayhem.”

 

“Aww is Spikey jealous that daddy loves his big brother more?” Darla sing-songed her taunt.

 

“Don’t even know the berk,” Spike snorted. “Don’t care to either. Enough bloody ‘art’ with just the pair of you.”

 

“I can’t say how much I hate saying this,” Angelus sighed. “Willie here is right. It’s time to leave London for a while until the publicity dies down at least.”

 

“I won’t go back to living in some hovel in a nothing town again!” Darla actually stamped her foot petulantly.

 

“Panthers could go ‘unting,” Dru grinned up at Spike. “One of those little rabbits may be close soon,” she tittered.

 

William perked up, gathering her meaning. “Where Dru?”

 

“The Russians Rock calls to the Power. Lots of tasty treats for all of us too, even pretties for Grandmummy,” Dru hinted.

 

Darla sighed in exasperation, “I wish she would just speak plain English.”

 

“Perfectly clear to me,” Spike replied confidently. “Dru’s sayin’ a new Slayer’s gettin’ all Chosen as we speak and pretty certain she’ll be in St. Petersburg. Didn’t you lot ever go to Sunday School? Peter… the Rock…?” He snorted at their puzzled looks. “Didn’t think so.”

 

At last he was soon to be in the same city as a Slayer! They would travel to St. Petersburg, Russia and Spike would have a chance at a real fight!

 

***

They had been in Russia for a year and still no Slayer. Dru kept promising that the girl would turn up.

 

Angelus and Darla were headed out to see a performance of Giselle. It would be the perfect opportunity to hunt down the elusive prey. Surely finding one Chosen warrior wouldn’t be that difficult?

 

Yekaterina Sokolova had only been a Slayer for a few months. Her Watcher was in despair that she would not be up to the calling. Until she was identified as a Potential Slayer she had lived a quiet life on a dairy farm and had aspired to nothing more than to one day marry and continue as she had. Now life was filled with monsters and horrors beyond her imaginings.

 

True, Viktor had told her about the things she would be expected to destroy but actually seeing them had been another matter. She had been terrified even with him at her side telling her what combat positions to take and instructing her in how to slay.

 

With an exasperated tone of voice he issued commands causing the poor girl to become more flustered to the point of being a little clumsy.

 

Spike had watched with interest. ‘This is the crack team that has Angelus’ wetting his britches?’

 

The more he had watched the more his dreams of glorious battle faded. There could be no glory in killing this kitten even if she did have claws. He imagined flashing his demon face and yelling ‘Boo!’ would win the battle without a blow being traded. ‘Not fair! Finally find one of the chits and she’s as useless as a newborn kit.’ He could taste the disappointment. Still he felt the draw, the need to follow and observe.

 

Spike also noticed the same tingle that he’d felt accompanied by the feeling of being watched. The tingle seemed stronger in the presence of the awkward Slayer. Maybe it was the source of the Power that these Slayers had that he had been feeling. Those same Powers that Chose their warrior were watching him and finding him wanting. Perhaps something in him could feel that Slayer power? Spike shook off those deeper concerns and resumed watching the bint.

 

He listened as her Watcher berated her performance. ‘Can’t the bastard see that his taunts are only making it worse for her? What kind of help is that?’

 

“You are a failure Trina. I should leave you to your duty and let fate take its course. Maybe the next girl will be up to the job.” The Watcher turned and left the girl in the cemetery alone and atremble.

 

Well, that was unexpected! Spike looked at the girl now vulnerable and frightened. It would take no effort to finally bag a Slayer. It didn’t feel right though. These girls weren’t just cattle, not someone to feed on like they were nothing more. This one was new but she had power that only needed development, strength that merely lacked confidence. She was supposed to be a warrior, a worthy opponent damn it!

 

Spike sighed and moved closer as Buffy stiffened. ‘Maybe he doesn’t count this Slayer kill because it’s too easy?’

 

“Seems to me the one who’s a failure is the one supposed to train you.” Spike’s voice was soft and not threatening.

 

The girl startled and looked around for a way to escape this man. The hairs on her arms stood up and she shuddered with fear. “My W … guardian will be back in a moment. Please don’t come closer sir.”

 

“He’s not comin’ back. Left you to be taken out by some newborn fledge,” Spike shrugged.

 

The ground behind the girl was already shifting as the vampire started to rise. The girl didn’t even seem to notice so caught up was she in her fear.

 

“Need to look behind you, pet.”

 

The girl did but wasn’t quick enough to dodge the slathering vampire who quickly pinned her to the ground while lunging for her neck.

 

Spike rolled his eyes and broke off a branch from a nearby tree. The dust of the vampire settled on the girl causing her to cough as it mixed with her tears making grey rivlets on her face.

 

Spike stood over her and sighed deeply. He reached out a hand to help her up. The Slayer’s eyes widened as she desperately tried to think of how to survive this night.

 

“Come on then. Not going to hurt you … not this time anyway. Want it to be worth my effort.”

 

“Who are you? I know what you are ... but who?” The girl dared to voice what she had been thinking.

 

“Name’s Spike. Good to know you can at least tell what I am. Not a total waste of time then.”

 

“What do you want from me if you aren’t planning to drain me?”

 

“Want a decent fight against a worthy warrior. You’re not that… not yet anyway.”

 

The girl blinked in confusion.

 

“Seems your Watcher’s not up to the job.” Spike curled his lip in contempt. “How ‘bout you and me dance together for a while, get you up to snuff. Then we can have a proper go at it, winner take all?”

 

The girl looked even more confused. “Dance?”

 

Spike laughed. “Yeah, mostly. I mean we spar, fight. Get your natural abilities trained enough to make you worth my while.”

 

Buffy was gobsmacked. Spike was offering to train the Slayer just so he could fight her and kill her? Yeah, that sounded like something he’d do.


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14

 

Buffy had watched as Spike trained the girl. Her confidence was building every day. It was surreal watching the two laugh as they traded blows. He really was a patient teacher, who knew?

 

Each evening Spike headed out only to separate from Dru as they hunted. He would meet the Russian girl at a pre-arranged spot and begin that night’s dance. She was never going to be as intuitive a fighter as Spike or Buffy or even Faith. She might have the potential to be as good as Kendra had been. All the official training seemed to have been more of a handicap as she wasn’t as quick to think out of the box as those who had eluded identification by the Council.

 

Spike was helping her a bit with that even if she fell back to her training often enough to irritate the vampire.

 

Still, the timid mouse was beginning to roar a bit.

 

“Where is it you’re off to boyo?” Angelus didn’t like not knowing what his pack was getting up to.

 

“Dinner time old man,” Spike smirked. “Don’t tell me you’re above gettin’ a bite.” He snapped his teeth to illustrate.

 

“Don’t think so, Willie. I think you’ve been up to something sneaky. Not sure what though and I don’t like being left in the dark.”

 

“You caught me,” Spike huffed. “Taken up ice skating on the Neva. Just because I’m dead don’t mean I can stop gettin’ proper exercise.”

 

Angelus didn’t appreciate the snark or the lie. Really, that was yet another failing in the youngest vampire in their group, he couldn’t tell a believable lie to save his life. His face gave it away every time. There were times when Angelus wanted to gouge out those speaking eyes of his and feed them to him. The humanity in Spike irked him beyond reason.

 

By the time Spike left their apartment he already looked battle wounded. He raced to the Summer Garden where he had hoped to train Yekaterina in how to use random items in the area in the fight. Now he just hoped she had waited when he hadn’t shown up on time.

 

He smelled the blood before he saw the body. His little Slayer who had been coming along so nicely lay dead. From the scents around her, she had run into a Vyasa and had literally lost her head. Spike was stunned to realize he was as much saddened at her death as he was disappointed.

 

***

Viktor Orlov should have known better than to answer his door so late at night. Watchers training must be as poor as the training he was supposedly giving to the late Yekaterina Sokolova.

 

Losing the chance to fight a Slayer who was at her peak was bitter but it seemed that Angelus got one thing right… Viktor’s blood went down a lot sweeter with the added fear.

 

***

It didn’t take coming from the future to know that Spike wasn’t going to let this setback stop him from his goal, his destiny as he called it.

 

“Meeting you, my beloved wicked enchantress, set me on the path of destiny,” he had said before they left Russia. “Always wanted to leave my mark, be a man whose name meant somethin’. May not be William Pratt or even William at all now, but one day the world will tremble at the name Spike.”

 

He’d kissed Dru and pulled her close. “The only other thing that ever mattered to me was epic love. The stuff of the poets!” Dru was half undressed by this time.

 

Usually Buffy would leave before the porn started but she felt a near compulsion to at least hear the rest. Something in what Spike was saying touched a part of her own soul

 

Wasn’t that what she had ached for as well? Wasn’t that what led her to ignore advice and warning signs? To blindly go on with her doomed love for Angel? That deep need for the kind of love that leads writers to write, songs to be written, myths to be told? Love that heaven’s Angels sang about in their choirs.

 

What better than the tragic, cursed, morose vampire doomed to be alone in the shadows with only his guilt and pain for company to play the hero of her story?

 

She was the pure maiden who could love away his hurts. Love him fully into the light. The stuff of dreams!

 

Here was Spike with the same kind of dream, with just as impossible a partner in the fantasy. Dru was a lost cause. Buffy didn’t have to be a psychiatrist to know that the vampiress was not only broken but that pieces were missing, too many to ever let Dru be able to be part of the poet's dream.

 

While Buffy was deep in her thinky-thoughts, Spike was balls deep in Dru. Buffy blushed as she realized she was watching the two as he made love to the dream.

 

Spike pulled out and pulled Dru over on top to let her set her own pace and Buffy got her first real look and …

 

“Whoa!,” she blinked several times, her eyes riveted on Spike’s cock all long and thick and glistening with Dru’s juices. “Guess all his innuendo wasn’t just hype.”

 

***

It had taken a while to convince Darla to move once again. Only the promise of the delights to be had in Vienna had moved her.

 

Dru had also whined, “But Vienna ‘as only pastry and sausages… and not the blood kind either.” She had pouted. “Couldn’t daddy take us to Belgium instead? There’s lovely fat Belgians filled with chocolate to devour.”

 

“Dru,” Spike suggested gently as if to a child, “Why not just eat the chocolate. I’m sure they have plenty in Vienna too.”

 

Angelus whacked him on the back of the head. “What sort of vampire eats human food, ya’ daft bugger?” A fine ale or wine is one thing but no point in the rest.”

 

Spike shrugged. “Why stop somethin’ I enjoy just ‘cause my heart has stopped? Tastes good.”

 

“Well… did you eat hay before Dru turned you? I’m sure the four-footed cattle would swear it’s delicious too,” huffed Darla with her regular eye roll. “Humans are our food.” She looked at Angelus “I swear this has got to be the most stupid vampire ever turned.” She flounced away to pack her many trunks for the trip.

 

“Lookin’ forward to Vienna. My great-grandfather got to see Haydn on his last trip to London. Said Vienna had likely musical geniuses on every corner.” Spike looked wistful.

 

“Plenty of ‘em, tis true. Saw more than a few meself even Haydn’s most famous pupil, Beethoven. Deaf as a Dalmatian he was but could hear the music of the Angels and put it to paper.” Even Angelus looked rapturous at the memory. He couldn’t wait to show off his ladies to the better classes in that ancient cultural capital.

 

***

 

Vienna sparkled and so did Darla. Well in truth some of Angelus’ ‘waistcoats’, as he called his vests, did too.

 

The quartet of vampires had slaughtered a jeweler and his family when passing through Warsaw and their pockets were heavy from having sold some of the pieces they hadn’t coveted for themselves.

 

As Spike had promised, Dru had been lavished with rubies, garnets and gleaming jet.

 

It wasn’t the first wholesale slaughter Buffy had witnessed. She’d seen enough for several lifetimes actually and expected more was to come.

 

Once she adjusted (as much as she ever could) to the idea that she couldn’t do a thing to stop the carnage, she tried to concentrate on the little details, the differences between the four demons so intimately on display for her education. She might as well get something profitable out of this long nightmare.

 

Angelus enjoyed prolonging the pain and terror. He loved nothing more than selecting victims from among the pious and innocent. Lots of convents and rectories found themselves on his radar. They were quick to grant access to unfortunate strangers too and that made them easy targets.

 

He shared delight with his broken child, Dru, in terrifying and killing children, though he left the infants to Drusilla as they weren’t aware enough to appreciate what was happening to them. No joy in the art if they didn’t first feel the terror.

 

Darla indulged them as long as she got her fangs into the wealthy or the clergy in the higher orders. Seems she targeted those who had looked down on her when she was human and vulnerable herself.

 

Spike gleefully went along, especially when a victim put up a halfway decent fight. It wasn’t that he showed any remorse or mercy, it was just that he seemed to enjoy the smash and bash and a battle hard won. The harder the better! He didn’t see the point otherwise. Still whatever his dark temptress wanted or needed he was quick to provide, even when it did nothing to satisfy his desires.

 

He had little patience for Angelus and Darla and their issues, however. That pair reveled in the evil of it all. The more heinous and vile the better. Rape a nun or priest right on an altar then force the hapless git to verbally renounce God before draining them? That, evidently, made the blood pure ambrosia to the pair of them.

 

With Spike, it was best when he’d come within inches of final death that thrilled him the most. Death was the siren that called to him, whispering it’s vague promises of mysteries and delights.

 

Poor Dru (yes, Buffy had come to pity her more than anything else she might feel about the demented vampire) only had fleeting moments of rapture before she’d tear at her hair and punish Miss Edith for her grave misdeeds. Then she would beg her daddy to chain her up and torture her. When Angelus refused on the rare occasion she would hector Spike until he would give in and give her what she demanded. At that point, Spike would be the one to feel clear remorse for having hurt his beloved. It was a vicious cycle that spun over and over.

 

If Buffy was asked now to explain the differences she would have to say that Angelus and Darla WERE evil, whereas Spike and Dru DID evil. The end result was still death and horror and piles of innocent corpses but the motivation was another thing entirely. She wasn’t sure why they were different, she only knew that this was true. 

 

Her job as Slayer wasn’t to figure out motive though. It was to protect the innocent. If she had her body she would still stake them all as her duty demanded. How she would feel about it afterward would be a different matter.

 

For the first time since this weird ‘tour’ began she offered a silent ‘thanks’ to whomever that she didn’t have her body so she didn’t have to do anything except watch… and whether she wanted to or not… think.

 

***

 

“Darla,” Angelus was grinning. It was a creepy look on him. “You’ll never believe who I ran into by the Donaukanal.

 

He waited as if expecting his bored paramour to actually guess. After a lengthy, embarrassingly awkward silence he sighed and gave up. “James and Lisbeth!”

 

Darla quirked a well-groomed eyebrow, “So they’re still together?”

 

“Seems like it. They’re both all over each other. If I could have puked I would,” Angelus made a face. “So disgustingly sweet with all their cooing and touching.”

 

“Gads, how long has it been? Must be close to a couple of centuries.” Darla shuddered. “You’d think they would have either moved on or killed one another by now.” She continued to file her nails with a practiced attitude of ennui. “They always were so boringly mundane and … dedicated. You would think they would have become heartily sick of one another. I would.”

 

Angelus sneered, his ego pricked. “Well, a steady diet of even the most talented whore would grow tiresome after a bit.”

 

Score! Darla looked positively livid.

 

“As if you could keep an experienced woman satisfied enough that she wouldn’t need something fresh from time to time.”

 

The part of Buffy that still stung from Angelus’ morning after insults couldn’t help but smile at the expression on Angelus’ face.

 

“So who are these two lovebirds,” Spike asked his curiosity pricked. Up until now, he was the only vampire he knew who would have been willing to swear fidelity to his partner and actually keep to the vow. Sadly, his partner was not of like mind. Still, he rarely strayed and even then his heart was never in it.

 

Angelus paid not one bit of attention to Spike or his question, irritating Buffy who was also quite curious about this vampire pair who evidently could love even without a soul as she had been led to believe was an impossibility.

 

“We haven’t run into them since Marseille back in 1767.” Darla tilted her head clearly thinking back to something unpleasant.

 

Angelus squirmed a bit. “True. James is still giving me grief over my telling Holtz your location. Still calls it a betrayal,” he scoffed.

 

“Well, if anyone should hold a grudge about that it would be me,” Darla relented with a laugh. “Another idiot like Spike here. Doesn’t understand even simple truths of demon life. You protected yourself and knew I could get away. What did he expect you to do, let Holtz end you?”

 

“I expect the lovesick fool would have, to save Lisbeth.” Angelus laughed. “Pair of amadans! She still wears that locket he stole for her.”

 

Angelus poured a generous amount of liquor and swallowed it down. He watched Darla as if to make certain that she wasn’t holding that grudge. One never could rely on her reactions. Darla could be fairly volatile when least expected.

 

“I’m glad you didn’t invite them here,” Darla looked at Spike and Dru who were cuddling on a loveseat in the corner. “These two don’t need any encouragement with their perversions. In fact, darling boy, why don’t we remind them both that a vampire takes what and who they want at all times lest they persist in this horseshite about love and destiny.” She looked, with malice, pointedly at Spike as she said it.

 

Spike didn’t like where this was going as Angelus leered and rubbed himself slowly showing that he was already hard and ready to dispense with another lesson.

 

“Think Dru and I’ll head out to get our dinner,” Spike stood and sidled towards the door.

 

“Not just yet, I’m thinking,” Angelus moved so fast Buffy’s eyes couldn’t follow as he pinned Spike to the wall by the door. “Darla’s right. Need more education. You wouldn’t want me to be neglecting my duty now would you lad?”

 

Darla grinned wickedly. “Come on Dru. This talented whore is in the mood for some soft curves and a clever tongue. I’m sure Angelus can handle your boy’s requirements without us.” Darla laughed as Dru headed towards the bedroom with nary an argument or backward glance at her struggling Knight as he protested in vain.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter End Notes:  
> This depiction of the difference between Angelus and Spike is not character bashing but an expansion on canon.
> 
> The idea that Angel and Spike had very different relationships with evil is canon. Angel episode, Damage (written by Steven S. DeKnight & Drew Goddard) has this exchange:
> 
> Spike: “But, uh... for a demon... I never did think that much about the nature of evil. No. Just threw myself in. Thought it was a party. I liked the rush. I liked the crunch. Never did look back at the victims.”
> 
>  
> 
> ANGEL:”I couldn't take my eyes off them. I was only in it for the evil. It was everything to me. It was art. The destruction of a human being. I would've considered Dana a masterpiece.”
> 
>  
> 
> James and Elizabeth, the vampire lovers referred to, appear in the Angel episode “Heartthrob” written by David Greenwalt. In this episode, Angel's former vampiric traveling companion James seeks revenge against Angel for staking his lover. This episode also introduced the nemesis of Angel in the character of Holtz who later kidnapped and raised Connor.


	15. Chapter 15

Chapter 15

 

They were in Rome. Buffy wished at least one of them had an interest in the Eternal City!

 

The Italian capital was on Buffy’s short list of places she’d dreamed of visiting one day. Of course, she meant the Rome of HER time. A time with Dolce and Gabbana, Gucci, and Prada not to mention Manolo Blahnik and Louboutin’s fabulous shoes … and, naturally, the money to indulge in more than window shopping!

 

Still, she’d like to see more than Angelus, his tongue nearly hanging out, drooling at the sight of all the red-caped Cardinals and others coming and going from the Vatican. He was seriously creepy with his obsession with the small city within a city and was clearly jonesing for a bloodbath of epic proportions. The Swiss guard made it a fool's mission, however, and Angelus was no fool. It was his version of window shopping Buffy supposed.

 

“Really he has got some serious issues with the church!” Buffy shook her head.

 

Darla was doing her own drooling thinking and complaining about all the wasted loot in the vaults at the Vatican. “Really! What does a church need with all that? They don’t even use it, or display it, just pile it up and lock it away.”

 

Spike and Dru grew bored watching the pair longingly look at the things they could see but not touch. “You two have fun your way and Dru and I’ll make our own entertainment,” Spike finally announced.

 

“Where do you plan to terrorize?” Darla asked, mildly interested.

 

“They’ve just opened the new Roma San Pietro rail station and it’s drawing pretty large crowds. Figured we’d drop by and see it and pick up a bite to eat at the same time.”

 

***

“I can’t believe that … whatever he is… ,” Angelus was fuming. “Those were my nuns!”

 

Spike rolled his eyes “Yeah, nuns are your thing, everybody knows that.”

 

“I mean… who calls themselves ‘The Immortal’? Says it like he’s the only one. And who does he think he is to be championing a flock of novitiates?” Angelus was boiling by now.

 

Darla clucked in sympathy. “Well, he does have a reputation to live up to.”

“Reputation!?!” Angelus exploded. “I have a reputation. Known all over Europe for my savagery and style.”

 

Darla ran her hand soothingly in his hair, “I know my darling boy but The Immortal lives here in Rome and never really leaves. He has connections to uphold, traditions to honor.”

 

Angelus began to lose the tension in his body at her unusually gentle touch and sympathy.

 

“After all he’s not some common vampire. He doesn’t rely on magic but still has powers like I’ve never seen before. They say he spent 150 years in Tibet studying under some tantric master,” her eyes glazed over. “He’s ancient, even older than my marvelous Master.”

 

Spike was curious, “So if he’s not a vampire what is he, a demon?”

 

“No one knows,” Darla replied. “He’s got a dark past that stretches forever but there’s no way to know if he’s even evil. He’s been under the protection of the Vatican since at least Sixtus I during the reign of Hadrian. Maybe that’s why he saved those girls from you, Angelus.”

 

“It’s not his right to interfere,” Angelus was pouting.

 

Buffy realized she’d seen more facial expressions watching Angelus than she’d ever seen displayed on his souled version. ‘Huh. You’d think the soul would have made all his emotions more obvious!’

 

Whatever this guy calling himself The Immortal was he was a major source of annoyance to Angelus. He stopped fixating on the attractions of the Vatican to concentrate on finding ways to provoke his newly christened nemesis. It was getting obvious that Angelus was getting under the other’s skin in a big way.

 

Buffy watched in amusement as The Immortal stopped taking the bait being laid by Angelus and instead began to court both Darla and Dru behind the other’s backs. It seemed there was more than one way to fight Angelus and the easiest way was to prick his pride.

 

Neither male vampire was thrilled to discover that the suave big shot of Rome had not only bedded their women but had managed to get them both to agree to a proper threesome. Angelus had been trying to talk Darla into that for ages with no luck.

 

That seemed to cool the interest in the Eternal city fairly quickly. After swearing blood vengeance on The Immortal, Angelus declared they were leaving Rome immediately. Angelus did not share his toys.

 

***

 

They had been in Constantinople for less than two days before Spike realized to his delight that the newest Slayer was also there.

 

As Buffy had witnessed more than once since that first time in Russia, Spike was sadly disappointed with the skills of the girl. From the time Spike had begun his never-ending quest to prove himself in battle against ’the best’ it had become more and more clear that the Council trained girls were handicapped. They had trained them to ignore their instincts, rely on formula, obey rather than think on their feet.

 

Zehra was the typical result of the Council’s training program. She reminded Buffy of Kendra and not only because of her dusky complexion and beauty and sparkling dark eyes. Her entire manner was the same. She was a well-honed weapon who moved, thought, and fought in the precise manner that she had been taught. One only had to observe a few of her fights to be able to know her next move before she made it. In short, she was cannon fodder!

 

‘It’s like these old British guys all think like their army used to! Lines of guys wearing bright red coats all standing with their muskets just waiting to be shot down so the next line can be the new target,” Buffy shook her head. Who said she didn’t pay attention in her American History class? ‘Okay, maybe more like paid attention to movies with hotties like Heath Ledger and that old guy that mom loved so much,’ she admitted reluctantly.

 

Still Hollywood got some things right. Demons fought like the colonials had. ‘Guerrilla fighting … and NOT the ape kind,’ Buffy giggled at the mental picture of ape wars. ‘Hum… apes have wars?’ Buffy pondered that for a while as she watched Zehra execute a perfect Kenpo move. Unfortunately, it was also perfectly predictable if you had ever seen her fight. ‘A slayer needs to think on her feet if she wants to live!’

 

Spike clearly thought the same way and had tried to teach more than one of these girls since Buffy had been shadowing him. So far he still hadn’t had that great battle he yearned for. Something else always got the girl first.

 

The one that had rankled him the most, almost pissing him off as much as his first disappointment, had been the rather promising German Slayer a few years before. She had made it to age eighteen and was starting to be a bit more independent. She had pushed back at her Watcher and the Council, started to think out of the box a bit. Spike had been delighted.

 

The Cruciamentum that ended her reminded Buffy of her own just the year before. The trio of demons they had set on the drug weakened girl had ensured her death. It had been both painful and gruesome. Spike had ranted about the ‘rite of passage’ for weeks after, cursing the Council for their obvious murder of such a gifted Slayer.

 

Buffy realized that Travers had been trying to do her in for real with her Cruciamentum. She wished she was back in her own time and body so she could let that weasel know how she felt about that epiphany. She and Giles were going to have a few words later too!

 

Spike watched this new girl using her tired moves on a couple of fledglings and shook his head. “Not gonna last long against anythin’ tougher than a newborn,” he sighed. Ah, well, another to groom for the real show then.

 

“Know you’re there,” he looked directly at Buffy even though she knew she was still less than a ghost to him. Spike had been doing that off and on over the years. He’d come to the conclusion that the feeling he got, that tingle of power and hint of disapproving judgment, was less likely an angel and more likely the source of Slayer power.

 

He’d begun to entertain that idea after he’d met his first Slayer and felt a similar and more intense tingle in her presence. He preened a bit that he felt that sensation more often than the other three vampires. He’d decided, with some pride, that it indicated that he had some important role taking out their Chosen Ones… or would once he got the chance. Those Powers, or whatever, had their eye on him. He was destined for glory, leaving his mark, mattering!

 

He looked back at the struggling adolescent girl and rolled his eyes. “Another one bolloxed up by your bloody Council of wankers. Gonna have to play tutor again. You lot,” he looked back towards Buffy, “might think about hidin’ your little girls from the twats that ruin ‘em. Settin’ ‘em up to die ugly and early this way.” The Powers were working against themselves and their cause letting the girls fall into the hands of the tweed brigade if anyone had asked Spike.

 

Spike’s luck was no better this time as the girl literally fell off a pier while fighting a Grappler demon while Spike watched helplessly and as her Watcher stoically proved himself useless.

 

A combination of no training in how to swim and the weight of her proper, modest, but impractical clothing proved her undoing. The Watcher was no better. He lived up to his title and watched as the girl sank beneath the water the last time then duly noted the date and time in his ever-present journal. The history of her short, brutal, life forever preserved between leather sent to join thousands of others on the Council library shelves.

 

“Is every bloody Slayer this raw and inept?” Spike wailed to the heavens. “THIS is the formidable foe that makes the Great Angelus wee in his knickers? The foe designed to thwart my evil ways?” He could have wept.

 

*** 

 

Their short sojourn into the western part of the Ottoman Empire had begun to pale to all four of the vampires. Angelus was unhappy to discover that very young Muslim girls were rarely left unaccompanied and vulnerable to his deadly seductions. Darla and Dru chafed at the restrictions society placed on women. They felt restricted and diminished being forced into roles of female behavior even more limiting than Victorian England in order to blend into the population. Even the lower classes conformed! Spike was still in a funk after his latest disappointment. In short, they were all ready to move on.

 

Dru had been the one to suggest a side trip to Romania. She said her pixies had insisted they should pay a visit to Vlad Tepes, the self-styled Prince of Darkness, officially the late Prince of Wallachia.

 

Buffy had been surprised to find that the most famous vampire in popular culture actually existed! Not only existed but was treasured as a hero among his people in the land where he was a real prince. Something about being a big hero a few centuries before when he successfully and brutally fought back against the armies of the Sultan Mehmed II.

 

The natives thought of him as their protector and let him feed as he chose, even seeing it as an honor to be selected. Since it wasn’t a heavily populated area, the scion of the House of Dracul had sense enough to keep it to catch and release… except when it came to his brides.

 

There were always three, always beautiful and of good families. Those noble families also saw this attention as an honor. They willingly allied themselves with Dracula, even at the cost of their daughter’s lives and souls. For what it was worth, the ‘brides’ seemed content with their lot. All in all, no one was getting out pitchforks and torches.

 

The Prince was currently in isolated seclusion, safe in his castle surrounded by his devoted servants and loyal subjects. He hadn’t strayed out of the area since a night in London when he had overindulged in some excellent brandy and his ego-driven reminiscences had resulted in a book the previous year that had revealed more about vampires than the average human normally would know.

 

His people might still revere him, but the world’s vampire population was less forgiving. Even with all the exaggerations, boasting, and outright lies, there was enough truth to make all creatures of the night royally pissed off with the showboat. Thanks to Dracula, even atheists now knew the effectiveness of holy water or a cross.

 

Between a bout of loneliness and a rapidly developing interest in Drusilla and her invisible companions, the four traveling vampires had been welcomed warmly. They had even, grudgingly, played by the hunting and feeding rules that permitted the detente with the local humans.

 

Buffy had been a bit surprised by that. She had always been told that all vampires were unable to control that need to kill while feeding. Angel had insisted that without his soul he would have been like all the rest, unable to rein in the demon. Angel had told her a lot of things that she needed to re-examine, Giles too.

 

Spike had become quite the card sharp over the long years of even longer daylight and Dracula was in debt to the tune of eleven pounds by the time their welcome ran out.

 

Dracula saw no harm in charming the delightfully fey Drusilla into his bed but was less open-minded when he spotted Angelus readjusting his trousers as he left one of Dracula's brides bedchamber.

 

The four visiting vampires found it in their best interest to move along before the villagers decided it was time to protect their protector and his household.

 

Spike was still complaining that Prince Tepes had welched on his gambling debt. According to Spike, some behavior was dishonorable even for a vampire. Apparently not paying one's debts was one of them.

 

*** 

The group hadn’t traveled very far before they caught sight of a colorful caravan traveling the same general direction they had chosen.

 

They had stayed far enough behind to avoid detection but Angelus had insisted they keep following the travelers in their many wagons anyway. It was dangerous. The Romani knew well what vampires were and even more, how to deal with them.

 

The first night the vampires caught sight of the gypsy caravan, Angelus had been transfixed. A young and beautiful girl had swirled in joyous dance around the campfire. All the clan had laughed and clapped and called out encouragement to the girl. She looked to be about twelve or thirteen, just the age range that most appealed to Angelus. He’d been smitten, obsessed didn’t even cover it.

 

The girl was lovely and also clearly beloved. You could almost feel the purity of her spirit. Her gentleness extended even to the wild animals they encountered. Her healing touch calmed even the most ferocious creatures, except for Angelus. Instead, he was inflamed just looking at her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter End Notes:  
> Another OC Slayer in this chapter.
> 
> The author begs the reader's indulgence: A slight twist in the real world timeline. The film The Patriot was released in June of 2000 which would actually be after season 4 of Buffy (Restless aired May 23, 2000) so just pretend it was released early for the sake of this reference, please!


	16. Chapter 16

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bits of dialogue from Welcome To The Hellmouth written by Joss Whedon, Angel written by David Greenwalt and Darla written by Tim Minear

Chapter 16

 

“Bunicule Vano,” the girl positively chirped as she wrapped her arms around the old, bent man. “Te iubesc!” 

 

The old man kissed her forehead with clear affection. “I love you too, granddaughter.” He beamed with pride as he looked at his grandchild.

 

The Kalderash Clan was much blessed with this one. She was sweeter than honey and graced by the Powers in so many ways. The clan’s most gifted seer had declared that she was a Potential Slayer when the babe had first been presented to her. It would be the first time one of their clan had been so trusted. They would raise her well. She would be so much more than just a weapon. Already she had shown herself to be a natural healer, in tune with the earth itself and drawing on the power from Devla’s creation. She was strong and most importantly, happy. She was the most precious thing the clan had with them and that included all the tools of their trade, the skill of metalcraft itself! All else paled beside this glorious girl.

 

The clan was making its way back to Ukraine after a successful trading trip that had allowed them to mingle with other Romani and many a match was made between the young ones. Not Kezia though, she was still far too young at twelve for anyone to entertain that sort of thought for their girl. If she was called to be the Chosen it would likely never happen for her and she seemed to accept her destiny with good grace.

 

She spent her days tending to her Uncle Teiso and her grandfather and claimed that was more than enough male needs to see to. She was a wonderful cook and kept the clothing clean and well mended. The only blot on her life had been losing her parent at such a young age, barely a babe out of swaddle.

 

The girl would have made a fine wife with her skills and sunny personality alone but she was also graced with astonishing beauty. All the young men knew better than to come sniffing around her though. They all knew her as special, set aside and treasured.

 

They were camped outside Borsa taking on supplies and selling their well-made pots and utensils. The mountains were green and verdant and the air crisp once the sun had set. Kezia had begged to be allowed to visit an old woman in the town she had met on the trip earlier. She had given her a healing and wanted to check to see that the old one was not trying to do too much for one of her venerable age. Peasant people could be quite stubborn that way.

 

Vano looked skyward and offered up a silent prayer for protection for his beloved. She was out later than he liked but the people of the town had been welcoming and there was no reason to fear they would turn on a young, sweet, Rom like in some other places.

 

***

Angelus moved silently up to the girl who had taken possession of all his waking and sleeping thoughts. It was the first time since he had begun tracking her that she was alone and approachable.

 

She was headed back to their camp but was still far enough away that he would have time to work his charm, or so he hoped. “Excuse me miss,” he said softly yet still managing to startle the girl. She narrowed her eyes in suspicion and glanced around her to see an escape route should it be needed.

 

“I think I saw you drop this in town.” He held out a small crucifix dangling from a chain safely far enough away from his hand to avoid any burning.

 

The girl blinked and shook her head, “No, sir. That’s not mine,” She began to worry. Some people who feared the gifts of her clan had been known to accuse them of theft and she wasn’t about to accept something that wasn’t hers from a stranger!

 

Angelus ducked his head and looked up at her through long lashes turning on his best shy boy affect. “Maybe it was meant to be yours then because I could swear I saw it drop from you.”

 

“No, I assure you it is not mine.”

 

“It might be useful though.” Angelus smiled slightly managing to look sweet and young all at once. “There are dangers in this world that ye might need protection from. Maybe the Gods decided you should have a wee bit of help.” He held out the necklace again. “Sure but there’s no harm in having a bit of a holy thing to help keep ya safe, is there?”

 

“You aren’t Romanian,” she accused.

 

“Right you are, lass. I’m a long way from home and merely traveling through much as you are.”

 

Kezia made a wide circle away from the handsome stranger who made her skin tingle. She began to walk towards the safety of the caravan and her family. Angelus kept pace with her making certain not to get close enough to completely terrify the girl.

 

He continued to act harmless, solicitous as if he was caring for her safety as the men in her family always did. Little by little she let her fear ease. She wasn’t used to seeing dangers behind every rock after all. The man had done nothing threatening and had a lovely face. Surely nothing truly evil could be hidden behind such eyes.

 

It took some doing but he managed to get the girl to let down her guard and they walked the path together in near silence.

 

By the time they had come to a clearing where the clans campfires could be seen Angelus offered the necklace once again. “Truly, you should have this. You need to be kept safe.”

 

That was something her own family had said all of her life. She loved them for it even as she sometimes wished for more freedom. Surely there could be no harm in making a new friend!

He seemed to care about her safety already.

 

“Thank you,” She took the cross and ran a finger over the lovely silver surface. Nothing evil would offer such a gift after all.

 

“Seems we’re both strangers here,” Angelus began as he stopped in the path intending to go no further. “I could use a friend.”

 

“Friends are good,” the flattered girl nearly stammered. No male outside of her own family had ever paid this much attention to her. It felt nice.

 

“Perhaps we could meet a time or two while we tarry in Borsa. I like to do drawings of the darlin’ animals roaming the hills here. I’d enjoy a bit o’ company if you’ve a mind,” he suggested.

 

“We will only be here long enough to finish trading and to celebrate a marriage of one of my cousins. Simza is pledged to a boy from another clan and they will be here in the next few days. I suppose there would be no harm in meeting a new friend while we are here,” she dared. “I’d love to see you draw the animals.”

 

“I’ll make certain to draw something special for you, darlin’. Maybe a soft rabbit or a new fawn, eh?” He smiled widely dispelling any lingering caution.

 

“I’d like that,” Kezia thought of having a lovely drawing made just for her to put in her sleeping area in her grandfather’s vardo.

 

***

Buffy watched Angelus “court” the gypsy child. He offered bits and pieces of information or conversation mean to act as a lure, built an air of mystery. It was very romantic to a child.

 

She found herself aghast as her memory went back to her first meeting with Angel.

 

 

Buffy had been startled by the man who had popped out of nowhere in the alley. “What do you want?”

“The same thing you do.”

 

He had stayed just that cryptic for … well, really he never stopped being cryptic!

 

Then there had been the gift. The necklace with the cross and the insistence that she needed protection, the implication being HIS protection.

 

“Who are you?” she had asked. He had given her no straight answer. Maybe she still didn’t have an answer to that question if she looked at it closely. The more she had been seeing the less certain she felt. 

“Yeah, well, maybe I don't want a friend.”

 

 

Just the previous year Spike had sworn that she and Angel weren’t friends and never would be. She was beginning to think he had been right after all.

 

Every move he made getting close to the girl, earning her trust even her little girl crush was like a mirror of the great, romantic, courtship Angel had conducted with her. Was it all just a practiced skill used for hunting? Had Angel merely changed the end game? Buffy felt a bone deep chill.

 

***

Darla was losing what little patience she possessed. Angelus hadn’t been this fixated on his prey since they had spotted and began their transformation of the young psychic now known as Drusilla. Darla really didn’t want another mad woman in their retinue, Dru and her lovesick, Slayer obsessed puppy were quite enough!

 

Even Dru could see the signs, “Am I to have a new sister soon?”

 

“Not if I can stop it,” Darla vowed. “He can have his fun but the fun ends with a final death. I won’t be saddled with any more addled bits of fluff for eternity! “ she looked pointedly at Dru only to be met with a blank look in return.

 

“We must always obey daddy. Miss Edith learned that lesson well.”

 

“I obey no one,” Darla proclaimed “He’s not my daddy, not yours either you daft cow.” She went off in a huff muttering about needing to nip things in the bud.

 

The next night Darla presented her darling boy with the unconscious girl complete with a bow and an admonition that he should get on with it. Angelus looked a bit disappointed to have the girl as a gift. He had been enjoying the game, luring her deeper and deeper into his web. He wasn’t ready to finish just yet. Still it didn’t go well when he fought Darla once she had made up her mind.

 

Still he did manage to restrain himself long enough to wait for her to waken and then enjoy as much artistry as possible in a limited time. He wallowed in the girls screams and bathed in her tears. He savored every plea and whimper. It might not have been the slow process he had been planning but it was tasty nonetheless.

 

The little girl who had healed so many wild and wicked beasts was finally devoured by the most wicked of them all.

 

*** 

 

Angelus tried to think of a famous painting to honor with a recreation using his latest contribution to the art world, the sweet-faced corpse of the no-longer-innocent gypsy girl. Nothing suitable came to mind which upset him more than it should. “Presentation is as important as the art itself,” he moaned to Darla. “Part of the job of a great artist is to move the viewer, and I’m just drawing a blank here.”

 

Darla shrugged. “I suppose you could use one of those poses like they are using for those post-mortem photographs that are all the thing back in London.”

 

Angelus cocked his head in contemplation. “Bit morbid, don’t you think?”

 

“Gets the point across though,” Darla pointed out.

 

Angelus looked at the now cold and rigid girl and contemplated the best pose. “We’ll need to place the piece somewhere near enough to their camp for them to appreciate my efforts.”

 

“Where are Dru and her boy?” Angelus frowned. The younger vampires had been going off on their own more and more of late what with his distraction over his latest masterpiece. He was shirking his duties as head of the family and that would not do. “Never mind, the boy has no eye for art. I’ll do it myself,” he sighed.

 

***

 

Buffy knew what was happening before any of the principles involved. She recognized the glowing eyes and the scream as Angelus was reunited with a soul.

 

It hadn’t taken the Kalderash clan long to put the pieces together once they found the grisly scene. They had wailed and mourned for their lost child, so precious and embodying such pride and hope for all of them. Then they had consulted their eldest seer to discover who had ravaged the beautiful girl, despoiled her radiant soul, and left her in such a horrific way for her loved ones to find.

 

Puri daj Zina had set her jaw and consulted all the old words putting together something fitting to punish the Magherdo who had taken dear Kezia. Simply having the creature dust would be too quick. He would just move on to a hell dimension with no Romany there to witness his pain and suffering. This one deserved a long existence in agony if possible.

 

“There must be a way for the curse to be broken lest the magic do harm to us as well,” one of the younger seers recommended.

 

Zina thought long and hard then smiled. “Yes! Should this monster ever find one moment of pure happiness the curse will be broken. Since he will be also cursed to feel intense remorse and guilt finding that happiness will be difficult as both the man and the beast within must share such joy.”

 

“But what if he should find that joy in love?”

 

“Then the object of that love will either perish on his fangs causing even more grief and remorse in time or she will have to dust him and send him to the fires of hell at last. Nonetheless, it is doubtful one such as this will ever love another.”

 

“Then let it be.”

 

***

 

Darla was greatly alarmed! Angelus writhed in agony and seemed tormented by ghosts. He barely slept being wakened screaming as the nightmares followed him back to the waking world. She had no idea what to do to ease his torment.

 

She was many things, but stupid was not one of them and it took only a short time to realize he was cursed in some way. The exact nature of the curse eluded her but she immediately figured out the source. It was time to gather the troops and force the dirty Romany to undo whatever it was they had done. She was sick and tired of all the screaming and his gibbering as badly as Drusilla.

 

“I am not a matron at Bedlam nor will I become one!”

 

The Kalderash clan had moved camp after a proper burial for the young girl. It took Darla a few days to get the scent and head them all in the direction needed to catch up with them.

Angel was having to be fed like one who was sick or a poorly created newborn. Drusilla gladly opened her veins for her daddy and Darla would feed him on occasion. Spike was reluctantly fed to him a time or two as well.

 

Darla had the head-man in a neck lock and demanded to be told how to break the curse, how to restore her darling, deadly, boy.

 

“”The beast must suffer as all his victims have.”

 

“We have your family, your whole clan and will cheerfully massacre the lot of you if you don’t undo whatever it is you’ve done.”

 

“His own soul was tainted, as black as the demon who took him,” began the old gypsy. “We gave him the soul of one of our own, one as pure as he is dark. One to jail him. He will know no peace. He will be unable to avoid the guilt.”

 

A soul! Darla would have thrown up if it had been physically possible. What a horrible curse indeed!

 

Before she could demand they remove the blasted thing she heard a commotion from one of the varnos and Spike poked his blood-stained face out the doorway. “Think we got ‘em all, grandmum,” he grinned wickedly.

 

“Hell!” Darla snapped the old man’s neck and let the body drop. “We needed at least the old woman alive to undo the curse you idiot!”

 

“Oh,” Spike looked a bit abashed. “Well you should have said! We’re vampires. I thought you all taught me that we didn’t leave any alive in a massacre?”

 

Darla looked over at her weakened and trembling lover and sighed, “We’ll just have to decide what to do about him elsewhere then.”

 

Dru was dancing around the campfire as if possessed. “Pretty music, pretty, pretty, music.” She pulled a bloody Spike into her dance with her. “They cry out for mercy. They cry out for mercy.”

 

 

*** 

Angelus had begun to improve a bit. He still was tormented especially in his sleep. It seemed clear that some of his dreams were of the hunt and the kill and also obvious from his physical responses that he was enjoying them. Upon wakening, however, he would feel the overpowering guilt for not only the acts he was reliving, but for the enjoyment he still took from those memories. It was a fine curse actually, he was miserable.

 

Each day he would try to lose himself in Darla and occasionally Drusilla. He had stopped his physical assaults on Spike, another side effect of the soul Darla presumed.

 

“Don’t send me away, Darla! I can’t make it without you, without my family.” His pleading had a whine to it that annoyed Darla given that she had no empathy whatsoever. Drusilla, however, was much moved. Even Spike had sympathy for the old bastard, shuddering at the thought of an imposed conscience after a century plus of rape, torture, and murder. He vowed to avoid magic and magic users if at all possible for the duration of his existence!

 

Buffy was startled the first time she realized that Angelus was having sex with the girls even with the soul. “I thought he’d lose his soul if he had a happy?”

 

Clearly whatever happiness he did have while rutting with the two vampiresses came short of that perfection needed to rid him of the soul. It was obvious he was enjoying it as he was also enjoying the blood of the corpses Darla and Drusilla had begun feeding him. He had no remorse over the sex and only some over the blood. He had managed to rationalize draining the bodies by reminding himself they were already dead anyway and his wasting the blood wouldn’t return them to their lives.

 

“I’m not going to keep playing nanny to you, Angelus. You want to eat you can feed yourself like a big boy,” Darla proclaimed once they had arrived at a small town with plenty of walking dinners.

 

Buffy watched as Angelus began to hunt. He chose his victims with as great care as he always had but his targets changed. Instead of seeking out the pure and innocent, and the young. He looked for petty thieves and drunken louts. The soul seemed to only give a small twinge when he fed off the criminal element, the bullies and brutes.

 

Buffy thought back to the night she discovered Angel was a vampire and how he told her that after he was cursed he no longer fed on humans at all. You have no idea what it’s like to have done the things I’ve done… and to care. I haven’t fed on a living human being since that day.” Seems that was a lie. Even if they were the scum of the earth, they were clearly human. It seemed Angel was able to rationalize a lot of things. Able to see what he wanted to see in order to benefit his own interests. Buffy felt sick.

 

If Angel’s change in diet made her sick because he was feeding, it was making Darla sick for other reasons. Her deliciously evil boy just wasn’t the demon he once was. He didn’t have that zest for evil that once made him stand out, the wickedness that had so delighted her even when he was still a human.

 

After a few months she’d had enough. “Angelus, if you can’t be the man you once were I have no use for you. Go, get out of my sight. If you ever get yourself together and remember that you are a vampire, one of the already damned, a creature made for vile deeds I’m sure you’ll know how to find me. Until then, be gone.”

 

Angelus looked terrified but unwilling to fight for a place in the group.

 

They all watched as he slunk off into the shadows.

 

Buffy let out a tremulous sigh. At least now she wouldn’t have to see her ex again while on this journey! Well maybe if she stayed in this weird magic-induced play until they got to Sunnydale she’d see him again but only after he was all noble and stuff. Yeah, that would be a lot more comfortable. She already had far too much to think about as it was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter End Notes:  
> Post-mortem photography was a big thing in the Victorian era. Creepy and weird, just up Angelus’ alley. https://www.bbc.com/news/uk-england-36389581 
> 
> Romany language bits were taken from here http://www2.arnes.si/~eusmith/Romany/glossary.html
> 
> Kezia’s greeting to her grandfather and bits are Romanian translated via Google, I claim no fluency in any language even English LOL.


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter 17

 

“But grandmummy, ‘ow will daddy find us all the way in the Far East?” Dru was insisting that her daddy would be back sooner rather than later.

 

The trio of vampires had traveled south and then east ever since the massacre of the Gypsy clan trying to ensure that no other group of Rom would decide to avenge the Kalderash and saddle them all with souls. They kept on the move, not settling for any length of time. A year had passed, though and Darla was wanting to settle in someplace posh for a while. She missed her creature comforts even more than she missed Angelus.

 

It had pained her to forego the riches along their journey. They had crossed the Black Sea and wondered at the opulence of Persia in passing. Darla had nearly been seduced into making their destination India where Maharajas had been known to find cool blondes enticing but had finally chosen a more practical location given their circumstances. They had boarded a ship leaving from the Persian Gulf headed for China complete with missionaries and mercenaries and somehow it had seemed fitting.

 

Dru and Spike had been kept in the dark about the full nature of the curse. They only knew that Angelus was at least half mad and no longer their cocky leader. No more the despoiler of women and master of murder that he once was and all because of the Gypsy curse.

 

Dru had rattled her usual garbled nonsense about sparks and imposters driving the wagons. She had wailed about jailed demons raging to be freed and of bad boys with no toffee or sugar plums to comfort them when forced to be good.

 

“Still find a way though, ‘e does. Daddy is very clever and knows ‘ow,” she reassured herself. “Wicked beasts always know ‘ow to break free, ‘ow to make weak sparks dim, trick jailers,” she nodded with glee.

 

For once Darla had a clue about what the mad seer was getting at. She also thought that her deadly paramour would find a way to reassert himself given enough time. She wasn’t planning to wait around for it though.

 

“China,” she had insisted. “There’s plenty of unrest just among the humans going on there since last November. It will be like a holiday.”

 

“A party!” Dru clapped her hands in delight. “Tea will be green but the streets red… like Christmas it’ll be.” She cuddled Spike. “We’ll decorate our tree with entrails and eyeballs. It’ll be oh so festive! And my boy will finally get a prize in ‘is stocking.”

 

***

 

“Finally got her to settle down and get some rest,” Spike had moved next to Darla on the deck as silent as a ghost. “She’ll want you before long if she gets restless.” 

 

Buffy felt a tug of sympathy. Even with Angelus gone Spike had to share Dru. She had been snuggling with Darla when it was time for sleep more often than not leaving Spike the odd one out as Darla was having none of any threesome.

 

“Angelus made her too dependent for her own good or our comfort,” she sighed deeply. “She’s not dealing with his absence well.”

 

“And you?” Spike had noticed the melancholy demeanor of her even if she wasn’t as vocal as Drusilla.

 

“I admit I miss him.” Darla looked up at the vast night sky that blended with the dark ocean that carried them to their new destination.

 

Spike snorted, “Can’t say as I do.”

 

Darla let out a slight laugh. “I don’t imagine you do at that.”

 

“Have you been together all this time?” All the years together and neither Darla nor Angelus had been particularly forthcoming about their lives before Spike entered the scene. He’d picked up bits and pieces, most from Dru. He knew far more about Liam O’Connor and Angelus than the mysterious woman who had turned the Irishman though. Darla was nothing if not private when it came to herself. Spike doubted that Darla was even her name.

 

Instead of rebuffing his question it seemed Darla was just lonely enough to talk, or perhaps Spike was a good enough listener to encourage confidences.

 

“I started out perfectly respectable, if poor. The history books only talk about Anne… my sister.. And little enough about her. We were both servants of Margaret Forrest. Actually, I was hired before Anne, back before Margaret married Thomas. We both traveled with them to Jamestown in 1608 with the second supply for the colony. Before we even dropped anchor I was discharged and sent off to make my own way. Anne would have helped but she would have lost her position as well.”

 

“Never would have taken you for anyone’s servant,” Spike said.

 

“You know as well as I that you are born to the station in life you remain in.”

 

“Still, beautiful woman like you could have found a merchant or the like I would have thought.”

 

Darla laughed bitterly. “I would have thought so too.”

“Why’d she let you go?”

 

Darla frowned. “Thomas liked me a bit too much for her liking.”

 

Spike felt a twinge of sympathy for the normally cold and calculating vampire who was once a vulnerable woman. Too often the serving class suffered through little fault of their own.

 

“So there I was in a place little more than a wilderness. No job or family and thousands of miles from anything I knew.” She gave a bitter laugh with no humor in it. “So I did what any girl wanting to eat did and set up business of the traditional kind. Oldest story in the world I suppose. All the sailors and settlers were more than happy to slip a coin or two for a quick fuck. Only a handful of women there, white women that is. I was quite popular.”

 

Spike took a breath and then took a chance to offer a bit of sympathy and comfort. “Lots of women who spent years being bought and paid for by man after man wind up hatin’ all of us. Fact you care for ‘gelus shows you haven’t had all the love burned out of you, haven’t let the bastards of the world win.”

 

“He was the only one,” she admitted. “You’re not wrong. After all the slathering bastards with their grubby hands grabbing and bruising I was pretty much done with them before the first winter came. There was something about Liam though.” She was silent and Spike let her wander in her memories for a while. It was fairly clear she had forgotten Spike was even there for the moment.

 

“He was all I once wanted, dreamed of. Nice merchant class boy. Pretty but with a sense of fun.” She looked at Spike making it clear that she hadn’t completely forgotten he was next to her. “The sort a … how did you put it? Ah yes, a beauty like me aspired to marry.” She grinned ruefully. “Of course by that time I was a vampire and marriage was nothing more than a joke.

 

“How’d you get turned then? Was it one of your customers?”

 

“You have yet to meet the Master,” Darla nodded. “He’s old. No idea how old. Somehow he had made his way to the new world and I caught his eye. By the time he introduced himself to me I was at the end of my short career. Had the pox and was dying. None of the good people in the colony would have a thing to do with me, not even my sister. GOD how I despise them!” Darla’s face hardened. “The only ones I hate more are the holier than thou clergy who all made sure I knew that I was going to roast in hell for my wanton ways… it’s always the woman at fault you know.”

 

“Load of bollocks that is.”

 

Darla gave him the only genuine smile she had ever granted to him.

 

“Heinrich… that’s the Master’s given name, Heinrich Nest, or so he claims. He offered me shelter and comfort as I lay dying. Finally, he offered me an alternative.” She smiled once more, this time with a hint of wistful nostalgia. “I had nothing to lose. Was headed to hell anyway. What did it matter if I took on a demon? I could feel healthy again, regain my beauty. I could pay back some of those bastards who took my youth and my life. I could live even though I’d be dead...put off that trip to the Devil for as long as possible. I couldn’t see any downside.”

 

“I understand that,” Spike nodded. “I didn’t have much to look forward to either, or so it seemed. Not as bleak as your situation I’ll grant you.”

 

“You didn’t face starvation and a painful death.” Darla’s eyes glittered with hatred remembering her lot.

 

“No, that wasn’t my situation,” Spike agreed.

 

“It’s funny.” She looked like what she was about to say was anything but that. “I don’t exist you know.”

 

“Because you’re a vampire?”

 

“Because I’m me,” she corrected him. “Written right out of history, not that I left my mark as a human. Left a lot of corpses though,” she snickered. “Don’t even get credit for them though. There was the starving time, only sixty survivors in Jamestown by the time spring came. What history doesn’t record is that not all of them died from the hunger. I enjoyed thinning the herd before the lack of food did it.” She looked quite pleased with herself.

 

“My sister made the history books. First marriage in the new world. Everyone can read about Anne Burras. Married John Laydon and had quite a nice life for herself even if I had her Johnny first, though I doubt he ever told her that. As far as history knows Anne was the only servant that came with the Forrests. No one remembers her older sister Alice. I was wiped out of existence before I was ever turned just as I was condemned to hell before I was ever a demon.”

 

They were both silent, staring out to sea for a time.

 

“Think any God unwilling to forgive a wee lass like Alice isn’t one worth worshipin’ if you ask me. I can see where you got your strength. Born in fire.” He placed a gentle hand atop hers on the railing. “Also see why you like to finally get your own back with the pious and pompous too.” He smiled rather sweetly, “Good on you Alice, good on you.”

 

“Maybe Dru wasn’t so crazy in choosing to turn you after all,” Darla muttered as Spike turned and headed back to his cabin.

 

***

Buffy spotted Angelus before any of his family and she was still in a bit of shock realizing he seemed to have followed the group just as Dru had implied he would.

 

“Wait! Angelus was here when Spike killed his first Slayer?” Buffy realized that she was soon to witness that first notch in his Slayer Killer belt. “He never said that. Why didn’t he stop him? Why didn’t he stake all of them back then? Wasn’t he supposed to be a good guy once he got his soul?” Clearly, there were even more things she was going to have to process based on what she had seen and learned.

 

One thing about being an invisible witness to all of this was that she had nothing else to do and no distractions to keep her from paying attention and also from giving everything a lot more thought than she was comfortable with in her normal life.

 

Darla didn’t exactly kill the fatted calf but she was obviously glad to see him.

 

***

 

Angel pushed Darla up against a wall and smiled ingratiatingly. “Honey, I’m home.”

 

“You found me.” Darla looked delighted to feel her lover close and see him looking almost like himself again.

 

“You can never resist a religious war and you always talked about China. I just followed the bodies,” he smirked. “You never used to be so careless.”

 

“Maybe I wanted to be found,” she flirted.

 

Angel stood straighter and smiled. Yeah, he still had it! “Spike and Dru?”

 

“They’re here. Probably out in the riots, maybe starting a new one,” she teased. God, she had missed him! She breathed him in, then lost some of her joy. “Still with that addition though.” Darla narrowed her eyes and pulled free. “Still slinking around chasing down lowlifes?”

 

“I’m hunting,” he hedged. Darla could tell that the soul was still in the driver’s seat.

 

“Did you come back to be killed? Freed from that freakish soul?”

 

“I came back for you, me darlin’” He gave her those puppy dog eyes that always worked on Buffy back in the day. “I want us to be like we were before. When we were happy.”

 

“Well I’d like that too, Angelus but I don’t see it happening. Not so long as you have that soul in place.”

 

“I’m still a vampire. I can still be your Angelus.”

 

Buffy was stunned. She could see that it wasn’t that Angel wanted to be good, it was that he just couldn’t be fully evil! This wasn’t what he’d led her to believe! If he could have gone back to living the way he had for a century without the built-in guilt he would have done it without regret.

 

Darla was as susceptible to the puppy eyes as Buffy had always been. She finally let Angel draw her into an embrace and the two kissed with more tenderness than Buffy had ever witnessed between them.

 

“Come on then, my lovely lad, let’s join the chaos!”

 

***

 

Buffy watched the reunited Whirlwind as they indulged in the violence that was all around them; human and vampire shedding blood and leaving a wake of destruction. It was hard to decide who left the most carnage.

 

Buffy spotted the Slayer before Spike did. The girl was good, the best Buffy had seen in all the encounters she had witnessed. This one was well trained. She was methodical but not predictable. Clearly, her Watcher had been diligent and clever as well.

 

Spike tailed the Slayer, watching and grinning like a madman. Finally! A warrior worth the title! Coming out on top of this battle would prove his mettle once and for all. It would be a kill worth crowing about forever.

 

He finally attracted her notice in a temple while the city burned around them. It was chaos and a thing of beauty and Spike’s demon sang with anticipation.

 

“Xīxuèguǐ,” The girl knew at once what she was dealing with even before Spike went into game face. She swirled into action immediately wielding her sword so fast that it was a blur.

 

Spike ducked and dodged as the blows came lightning fast. “Just like I pictured it,” he laughed with glee. “This good for you?”

 

The Chinese Slayer went on assault nicking Spike on the eyebrow causing blood to partially blind him in one eye. Buffy caught her breath seeing that this was one battle that Spike, good as he was by now, could well have lost. If she hadn’t the knowledge of how it turned out she would have fully expected him to lose before her eyes.

 

Spike backhanded the girl, landing the blow well enough to cause her to lose her grip on the sword.

 

The fight turned hand-to-hand but didn’t lose any of its deadly possibilities. The girl was skilled in various martial arts and wasn’t intimidated by the vampire intent on killing her. She landed blow after blow with her fists and feet.

 

Spike gave as good as he got though. It was obvious they were well matched with the battle favoring first one then the other. Finally, the Slayer got the upper hand pushing Spike back against the wall pinning him there with her foot. She went for her stake and prepared to give the final blow when an explosion threw her off her game and balance.

 

Spike took full advantage, ready to end the deadly dance and claim his coup. He knocked the stake out of her hand. The girl made the mistake of reaching for the fallen weapon rather than sticking with her hands and Spike used the opportunity to grab her by the wrist and yank her arm behind her back pulling her close to sink his fangs in deeply.

 

The girl knew the never-ending battle against the darkness was over at last. “Gàosù māmā wǒ hěn bàoqiàn,” she begged in a language Spike did not know.

 

Spike dropped the dead girl’s body like so much litter her usefulness to him now at an end. “Sorry love, don’t speak Chinese.”

 

He was still panting but nearly vibrating with energy as he licked the blood from his lips. ”Fella could get used to this.”

 

Buffy felt sick even having been prepared for what she had just seen. The girl had reminded her of herself in many ways and had been so young and vital.

 

***

 

Angel had been joining in with the others yet was still selecting his victims from among those that his soul seemed to agree didn’t deserve life or consideration. Darla had watched, clearly not pleased but willing to compromise to a degree.

 

While Spike was engaged in his long-awaited battle to the death, Angel had come upon a family with a small baby, missionaries from the look of them. Angel was torn with the decision of what to do with them when Darla came on the scene. Angel quickly took Darla by the arm and drew her away claiming that there was nothing but bodies to be found there. Darla knew better but let him lead her away with only a backward glance.

 

Buffy had found him there as she fled the scene of Spike’s victory, not willing to watch him celebrate the kill.

 

Sooner than she would have liked they came upon Spike and Dru, both coated in the Slayer’s blood and giggling like a pair of children fresh from a special treat. Spike was positively giddy.

 

The four stood in the street as the world burned around them as if they had not a care in the world. They were an island unto themselves.

 

“So where have you two been?” Darla arched a delicate brow amused at the pair’s obvious joy.

 

Drusilla turned in Spike’s arms and begged, “May I tell?”

 

Spike smiled indulgently, “No need to be humble.”

 

Dru turned to Darla and stated with great pride, “My little Spike just killed himself a Slayer.”

 

Angel looked at the two of them his face not registering so much as a little bit of disgust.

 

‘My God, Angel and Angelus really are basically the same guy at the core!’ Buffy’s eyes widened as she took in the scene. ‘He doesn’t care at all that Spike just killed the Chosen one. The only time he feels any remorse is when he does things that the curse makes him regret. Nothing else bothers him. He hasn’t got a moral compass at all even with the soul.’ She was shocked.

 

“Congratulations. I guess that makes you one of us,” Angel had said. He had CONGRATULATED Spike!

 

“I smell fear,” Dru looked over Angel’s shoulder towards the alley where they had left the missionary family.

 

Angel tried to distract his all too perceptive lover, “Yeah, the whole place reeks of it. Let’s get out of here. I’m bored.”

 

***

Spike and Dru were sleeping the sleep of the sated when Angel returned to the house Darla had commandeered for their housing early on.

 

“I know the truth, Angelus.” She looked at him sadly. “You still can’t enjoy the kill.”

 

“That’s not fair, Darla. I’ve been feeding, you’ve seen me!”

 

“Yes, and I’ve seen who you select too.” She looked at him with deep disappointment. Her boy was still lost to her. “Not an innocent in the bunch. … I did find them you know.”

 

Angel had a good idea what she was getting at but played dumb. “Yeah? Who’s that then?”

 

“I went back. They really are just corpses now just as you should have left them instead of drawing me away with your deceptions.” She went to a box in the corner, her back to Angel. “I saved you a little something though.” She turned with the baby in her arms.

 

Angel looked appalled. He knew where this was going, what the test was. The blasted soul wasn’t going to let him pass it either and he knew it. Darla knew it too.

 

“Prove you’re my boy.” She held out the new orphan.

 

The game was over. Angel fled before his maker could finally end him.

 

***

 

In the twenty years that Spike had known the cold-hearted bitch, he’d never seen her shed a tear. ‘Must’ve loved the wanker after all,’ he reminded himself. Darla had indulged in virtual vats of Baijiu since handing Angelus his walking papers.

 

He remembered their conversation on the trip to China and felt a pang of sympathy. Life had not been kind to Darla and her eternity didn’t seem to offer much hope for better. Something about seeing the old vampiress so unhappy touched his unbeating heart. He was always a fool where love was concerned.

 

“Best he go out on his own. You did the right thing. Actin’ crazier than Dru lately and the way he was lookin’ at all of us I half expected a shaft of wood in my heart one fine day,” Spike tried to console his great-grand-sire. Angelus had acted stranger with each passing day. It had been unnerving.

 

“I know,” Darla whimpered. “I’ll be just fine without him, better even.” She sniffed and took another drink. They had gone their separate ways often over the years but in the past it was usually Darla who had chosen to leave, often to attend to her own Sire wherever he was at the moment. Angelus never cared for Nest and refused to refer to anyone as “master”.

 

“This was the longest we’ve gone without a break, not counting those months after the curse,” Darla whispered. “I think a part of me couldn’t stand watching you and Drusilla, how you cling to one another. Most of the time it made me sick. Other times it made me wonder why it couldn’t be the same for me and my darling boy.”

 

Spike resisted the urge to hug the vampire who had helped to make his unlife a hell. “Shows you love him more than you might want to admit.”

 

Darla seemed to accept what Spike said without letting her defenses turn his words into condemnation. “Maybe.”

 

The next morning Spike and Dru awoke to find Darla and her many trunks gone without so much as a note. Spike remembered the last sight he had of the matriarch of his vampire family, it was one he had never imagined ever seeing; Darla wept.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter End Notes:
> 
> Bits of dialogue from Fool For Love by Douglas Petrie also from Darla written by Tim Minear
> 
> Chinese translated via Google, likely not completely accurate. Xīxuèguǐ is the word it gave me for vampire and Gàosù māmā wǒ hěn bàoqiàn translated to “tell my mother I’m sorry,” as in the subtitles in the episode.
> 
>  
> 
> Alice Burras is, of course, a complete fiction but Anne Burras, Margaret Forrest and the starving time are all historical fact. It is also a historical fact that there were precious few women in the colony at the time BtVS set Darla’s turning (and not anything like the type of housing they showed).
> 
> Baijiu is the traditional Chinese alcohol and the main alcoholic beverage in people's daily life. It is a distilled alcohol made of grain sorghum as the main ingredient after a series process of cooking, fermentation and distillation. There is a famous verses in China: what to expel the melancholy? the Dukang Liquor (Equivalent to Baijiu). This explain why Chinese people love Baijiu so much. Although the strong Baijiu taste spicy and even painful, after they take several sips, they feel the blood surging and feel unprecedented pleasure and excitement. It is an usual method used by people to dispel worries and boost courage.


	18. Chapter 18

[](https://imgur.com/8qo3jLs)

Chapter 18

 

Giles set aside the latest volume he had combed through for answers. He glanced at the bubble that surrounded his Slayer and the pest of a vampire who had begun to take up far too much of his life even before this current mess.

 

The children had been of limited help. Xander thought he was being stealthy while pretending to research but Giles had noted more than one book that the boy was supposedly reading was upside down. Willow had been the only one to actually seem interested in actually trying to find an explanation for the situation at hand.

 

Xander’s strange and slightly off-putting girlfriend had been present but had ceased to even try to contribute. Giles remembered she had started to offer some opinion or another but it must not have been particularly important as she hadn’t volunteered anything since.

 

Currently, Xander was nose deep in a book but snoring. Giles sincerely hoped he didn’t drool in his sleep as the volume he was using as a pillow dated from the sixteenth century and was not water-proof in the least.

 

Willow, Giles only real help, had no choice but to leave them to it as she had classes. He couldn’t fault her. They had been diligently working on the problem for a full day already with no progress.

 

The Watcher gazed at the Slayer who was so much more than that to him and re-dedicated himself to breaking whatever curse or magic held her locked in stasis with the infamous slayer of Slayers.

 

***

 

Willow was frantic. She knew she should tell Giles about her spell. Withholding information was of the major bad. Still, she tried to convince herself that something else, ANYTHING else, was going on that froze Buffy and Spike that way. Her spell was carefully worded and didn’t really have anything to do with freezing anyone much less her BFF or the kinda scary vampire.

 

It must have something to do with the goddess involved she had concluded. Thus Willow could be found in the section of the University library that housed the research material on ancient deities and cults. Surely there was something that would explain what was going on. Something that would have absolutely nothing to do with any magic that might have, sorta, kinda, been cobbled together without too much research first.

 

“Hi,” the soft voice was hesitant. “You’re Willow, right?”

 

“Yuppers,” Willow looked up from the latest useless book and tried to remember where she had seen the understated but beautiful girl speaking to her. “Wait! You’re in the Wicca club aren’t you?”

 

“T - T - Tara,” she stuttered shyly and ducked her head. She had a sweet smile and sparkling eyes… really beautiful eyes, like in some portrait by a great master.

 

Willow remembered that this girl was the only one of the wanna-be’s who seemed to actually be interested in magic when she had checked out the group.

 

“I see you’re interested in the ancient ones. I love reading about the more obscure goddesses even though Mother Gaia is my primary goddess.” It was interesting how talking about her belief seemed to remove the stutter. Probably because she felt more confident about the subject. ‘Maybe she knows something about this Eleos.’

 

“Yeah. I’m working on a special project and came up with an idol to someone I’ve never heard of.” In truth, Willow knew little of the ancient beliefs and theologies of the pagan world. Her interest in magic was more in line with the manipulation of power than the worship of old deities.

 

“M-maybe I could help,” the sweet girl offered.

 

Willow motioned to the other chair and tried to decide just how much she wanted to reveal to her potential resource. For some reason she couldn’t explain Willow wanted to make a good impression on this girl, wanted Tara to like her.

 

“See I found this old statue and the shopkeeper told me it was of some goddess names Eleos but I can’t find anything much about her or what the idol might have been used for.”

 

Tara closed her eyes as she searched her memory. Finally, a cute half smile formed on her lovely face. “Yes! I remember her. She wasn’t worshiped much. There was only one altar dedicated to her in Athens I think it was. She was known for her gentleness. People and de… er... well all kinds of people would call on her for clemency, pity, and empathy. She was called the goddess of empathy actually. The ancient world was pretty harsh so goddesses like her weren’t too popular, neither was empathy.”

 

“So you know how her worshipers might have used the icon? There is a small cauldron at the base and it looks like incense was burned at some time.”

 

Tara was nodding. “Not much is written about just how she was worshipped of course but that would make sense. There were always offerings of some kind made when seeking the favor of a god or goddess. Incense is pretty common. The way the scent sets a mood and the smoke lifts up like to a heavenly realm are some of the reasons according to most experts. Some churches still use it.”

 

Willow smiled widely. “I’m Jewish, well my family has always been. My folks and I never did much except some of the cultural parts.” She shrugged. Willow had a vague belief in some kind of Higher Power but that was mostly because of Buffy and her calling and not some religious training or faith. It was hard to not believe in gods and angels and the like when you have met demons and faced a Hellmouth after all!

 

“Um, maybe I could be of more help if I saw the idol?” Tara didn’t want to be pushy but couldn’t resist a chance to further this connection with the hot, smart, redhead who had been featured in more than one dream since their brief meeting a few weeks prior.

 

Tara went to the shelves and lovingly ran her hand over the bindings until she found a small volume and smiled with triumph. “This might help too.”

 

“If you don’t have a class and are free I’d love you to meet some friends of mine and see the statue,” Willow impulsively offered.

 

It was only on the walk to Giles’ apartment that she remembered the odd sight of Buffy and Spike that she would have to try to explain to her new friend. “Ahhh… Could we stop by the Expresso Pump first? I need to tell you a few things that you might have some trouble believing but I swear I can prove all of it if you give me a chance.” Willow bit her lip. “We really could use your help too and I hope you’ll at least give me a chance.”

 

Tara blinked and briefly wondered if she should reveal anything about her own circumstances before going further with this friendship. She wasn’t far from her birthday after all and it would come up eventually. Maybe dipping a toe in the water of honesty would be a good idea. She’d let Willow take the lead on it though. “Okay. I have a pretty open mind.”

 

*** 

Anya glanced up as Willow and a new girl entered the apartment. The girl gave off gentle waves of solid power and Anya perked up. There was more to this Tara than her quiet reserve let on. The former demon decided that whatever power Tara had was every bit as strong as the scary power Willow wielded willy-nilly only this other girl had hers grounded. Anya respected that and was inclined to like her.

 

“Hey, guys,” Willow beamed. “This is my friend Tara. She’s Wicca and knows tons about old goddesses and stuff.” Willow gestured towards the two startled males at the table. “Tara, this is Giles and Xander my oldest friend. Xander that is… my old friend like in since kindergarten not old as in being old like Giles. Not that Giles is old or anything just older than us cause he’s an adult. Well, we’re adults now too but he’s been one for a lot longer.” Willow managed to stop herself before she dug the hole deeper.

 

Anya spoke up, “And I’m Xander's girlfriend and sex partner. Willow must not have seen me sitting here.” Ahn smiled in welcome and held out an awkward hand in greeting.

 

Tara blushed and ducked her head again in shyness. “N- n-nice to meet you all.” She was barely audible.

 

Willow had given her the Cliff-notes version of the group with just enough information to make Tara more than a little nervous. This was the first group outside of her family who seemed to know that demons existed and the supernatural was more than parlor tricks if what her new friend had told her was true.

 

It was then that Tara noticed the other two people in the room. Rather the two in a mystical bubble in the room. The girl was human but the aura of the male was distinctly demon. There was also something odd with the aura around the blunt but friendly girl who introduced herself as Anya. Tara couldn’t help but be intrigued by the strange group she was meeting.

 

Willow followed Tara’s gaze as she looked at the sphere surrounding Buffy and Spike. “Um. This is our mystery. That’s Buffy and Spike. Giles found them like that and the only clue we have is the statue that I bought. See how they’re both holding it?”

 

Tara walked as if mesmerized as she studied the frozen pair.

 

“I really don’t have any clear k- k- knowledge but I might make a guess based on the goddess and some things in this book about the use of her power by...,” her voice dropped as did her head, “demons.”

 

Giles raised his eyebrows and reached for his glasses and handkerchief as if by compulsion. “Demons?”

 

Tara tensed up. “Um, I know you might think I’m odd or strange but… um… there are other species…”

 

“Indeed,” Giles interrupted the bashful girl. “We are all aware of demons and demon lore here. It’s just that we aren’t accustomed to meeting other people likewise aware.”

 

“Oh!”

 

“Please continue, Tara wasn’t it?”

 

“Well um, demons often war against one another and it can cause problems with other species that aren’t part of the wars. There’s a legend that during a long war between two species it was decided that there had to be a way forward to peace to keep it from becoming a kind of … I don’t know… World War kind of thing with all the demon races being involved.”

 

Anya smiled brightly. “The Great War of Klemass,” and nodded in agreement.

 

Tara glanced at her, “Y- y- yes. I think that’s what it’s called in the demon histories.”

 

“Well that was long before my time but you’re right. I forgot all about the way the idol was used in that war!” Anya smirked and leveled a superior look at Giles who was gaping at her. “Of course I was fully aware of how it was used after that successful peace initiative.”

 

“Do you mean to say that you had information pertinent to our research all this time?” Giles was gobsmacked.

 

“Of course.” Anya looked exasperated. “I did try to tell you right away but, as usual, no one listens to the thousand-year-old ex-demon who’s seen and done more than most of you will ever even imagine in your short, restricted lives.”

 

Giles blinked and Xander squirmed as they fleetingly remembered ignoring Anya and her attempts to add to their conversations.

 

“I do apologize, Anya. It seems I have been remiss.” Giles admitted. “I seem to have focused far too much on your current personae of a young teen and forgotten who you truly are. I promise to try to remember in the future.”

 

Anya gave a curt nod. “Honestly, you all could do with ending your willful blindness but apology accepted.”

 

Tara had watched the exchange with interest. There were so many questions! Right now, however, she was there for a specific purpose.

 

“Do go on,” Giles nodded to Tara then looked at Anya. “I’d love to hear more of your information as well but Tara seems to know about the initial use.”

 

Tara glanced at the cool blonde with the crossed arms and decided that she wouldn’t be stepping on any toes by complying. “Eleos is the goddess of empathy. By calling on her the two parties learned about each other. It was kind of like that old Native American saying about walking in one another’s shoes. When the goddess finished, they were more interested in finding a solution that worked for both their people and ending the violence. They came to an understanding. After that, she became a patroness of peace and different warring or close to warring demon races would use her to settle disputes before they got out of hand.” Tara looked at the people all hanging on her words. “See demons didn’t want to draw too much attention to themselves because humans would have just committed genocide and warring would have been dangerous to them all. Most demons just want to stay under the radar and go about their lives.” Tara only hoped they would let her do so once she came into full demonhood.

 

“Anya,” Giles nodded to the previously neglected resource. “I believe you have more information you can offer?”

 

“Finally!” she huffed. “It’s like Tara said. Eleos was largely forgotten by humans and embraced by demons. A shaman would make the proper sacrifice and call on the goddess then a representative of each party would touch the icon voluntarily. They would be frozen in a kind of pocket dimension where time pretty much stops. They called it the Eye of Eleos, kind of like the eye in a hurricane where everything is peaceful and calm while the storm is all around.”

 

“So what’s happening to the Buffster,” Xander’s furrowed brow showed just how concerned he was about what might be happening.

 

“Well if I had to guess, Buffy is seeing Spike’s life and he’s seeing hers. Like Tara said, they’re walking in each other’s shoes so there can be true understanding.”

 

“Wait! No! No walking in Spike’s shoes!” Xander looked appalled. “Hang on, what about the invocation part of it? Wouldn’t they have had to do all that?”

 

Willow shrunk into herself and took the opportunity of having no-one looking her way to slip out the door before anyone put two and two together.

 

Giles saw Willow’s retreat from the corner of his eye and immediately became suspicious. The idol had come from her after all and she did have the power to have set something in motion that got out of hand! He would have gone after her but needed the rest of the information first. He knew how to locate Willow to ask about her part in this later, with a truth spell if necessary!

 

He cleared his throat and bit back on his ire. “So should someone light the fuse so to speak the ground would be laid for the goddess to become involved?”

 

Anya shrugged. “Looks like. Maybe Buffy and Spike were the first two warring parties to touch it at the same time and the spell took hold.”

 

Tara nodded. “That makes sense. It all is outside of time after all so there could be a delay between the ritual, the invocation and the parties being swept up in the magic.”

 

Xander looked horrified. Just the idea of the disgusting stuff Buffy had to be seeing made him nauseous. “So how do we stop it?”

 

“We can’t,” Anya stated. “The magic has to run its course. They’ll be freed up when Eleos is satisfied that they both understand each other perfectly and not before.”

 

“So Buffy sees Spike’s gross life and vice-versa until this goddess decides they are sympatico?”

 

“There’s no guarantee of the outcome. It’s entirely possible they’ll come out of it still hating one another, still enemies.”

 

Xander let out a relieved breath. “We can only hope! Buffy getting up close and personal with Dead Boy, Jr. might have the side benefit of getting her to finally dust his pasty ass when she’s back to normal instead of giving him a pass because of the chip.”

 

Tara was confused, “Dust? Chip?”

 

Giles looked at the newcomer with sympathy. “I suppose we should explain a few things in detail since you’ve been pulled into this situation. Would you care for some tea?”


	19. Chapter 19

Chapter 19

 

Darla’s leaving had put Spike in the driver’s seat for the first time. Dru was powerful but her visions often made her vulnerable when reality faded and the world only she could see came to the forefront. She needed Spike to keep her grounded and to keep her safe when the Pixies began to talk.

 

Buffy watched him tenderly care for Dru as she wept for another man. Saw him hold his tongue and patiently see to her needs as she lashed out in frustrated anger fueled by the abandonment by her elders.

 

Dru was angry and her anger had no logical target so it went scatter-shot with Spike getting hit the most often when it flew.

 

She was also angry with the invisible players around her, all of them, including Buffy.

 

“Nasty bits of Sunshine,” Dru glowered in Buffy’s direction unnervingly. “Not your time yet. Shadow in the shadows peeking at our drawers and calling for laundry maids. Can’t have them both! Steal from Princess AND Miss Edith you will, but not now!”

 

Spike looked at his maker nervously. She had become more difficult to handle and understand since Angelus left the final time. Losing Darla only made it worse. Not that either of the two missing vampires had ever been very good at interpreting Dru-speak. Still, her state of mind made it hard for Spike to be in tune enough to follow her twists and turns.

 

Before she was more than able to hunt and feed but after Darla’s departure, she would frequently forget or would charge in to feed in a way guaranteed to leave her as dust. Spike couldn’t take his eyes off of her without risk.

 

“Precious, its night time, no sunshine at all, not even bits,” he tried to comfort her.

 

Dru just looked at him as if he were the mad one in the room.

 

“Blind you with ‘er goodness she will,” she pursed her lips and gave a death stare towards Buffy. “Reach right in an pull out your bits and leave you to bleed.”

 

“You are very good to me, beloved and I’ve been blinded since we first met,” Spike tried to cajole her into calmness. “You only make me bleed in the best of ways.”

 

“Not the moon dance, meant to waltz in the sun but not yet.”

 

Spike sighed and resigned himself to another sleepless day and long night hunting for two.

 

***

 

Buffy noticed a lot now that the focus was only on the two vampires and not the whole Whirlwind.

 

One of the first things she realized was that Drusilla was in no way feeble, not in mind or body. She had seen the frail-looking female pick up and toss a man built like a professional linebacker with ease. As for her mind, it wasn’t that her brain didn’t work, it was more like she was in a dream state (or nightmare state at times) where things made sense but only after the fact and only when you picked it apart to see what the reality actually was. True it made actually functioning difficult but she was not feeble.

 

If anything she was strong. She had to have always been strong to have survived what Angelus did to her as well as she had. She also knew very well how to get what she wanted, especially from Spike.

 

Spike was devoted. Even though Drusilla bore no relation to the sort of woman, the type of life, that William had always wanted she was his from the beginning, or rather he was hers. Her impairments made it impossible for her to have the same devotion as he but it was clear that as much as possible she did love her creation. He was what she wanted to want.

 

She was twisted enough that she would always need her daddy and crave his affection such as it was. Angelus would always come first, she’d been made that way. Still, the “Miss Edith” within had a desire for a decent, loving, loyal man that she had seen in William. That part of her did love him and appreciated him. She also knew how to manipulate him masterfully.

 

And Spike? He just wanted to belong, to be loved. He was willing to be anyone and anything in order to please the object of his affection. He would be the monster, the warrior, the doting lover, the obedient child of Angelus and Darla...anything Drusilla wanted him to be. Still, he managed to maintain a way to do what he must on his own terms though.

 

Fairly early on the purpose did change in their travels and day-to-day lives. When Angelus and Darla ruled the roost the pursuit of evil and destruction seemed to be the goal, now it was a by-product. Yes, there were killings and even massacres when Dru had her heart set on one. There was destruction aplenty especially when Spike started one of his all-out brawls. But there was more too.

 

“What’s the point of livin’ for soddin’ ever if it’s nothin’ but killin’, eatin’, and fuckin’?” Spike had truly looked to Dru for an answer to that question. He’d wondered for years why when having eternity laid before him the lifestyle was even more constraining than the human one he had shed in his grave.

 

Dru had no answer for him since she knew only one way to live her eternity and that had been the one Angelus had created.

 

“I say we start to have some fun,” Spike smiled and twirled his lover around the room. He remembered the life he had envisioned just after his turning and decided there was no reason to give up on that plan.

 

“There’s a whole world to see, things to experience and enjoy.”

 

Dru was confused with the options suddenly before her, “But what about my dollies? Where will we swim in rivers of blood?”

 

“We’ll still have all that my lovely. Not askin’ you to starve or lose your pleasures, just add more, yeah?”

 

She looked skeptical but didn’t fight him on it. They celebrated by indulging in a bloodbath that satisfied even Dru.

 

***

 

Spike had considered a ship from China but then remembered how long a voyage he was contemplating. Keeping Dru from doing something that would jeopardize them both for that long a time was not yet in his skill set. A shorter trip to Russia and utilizing their superior rail lines west and back to European connections proved far more efficient and stealthy.

 

There was still the ocean to cross but the Atlantic was a much shorter time to keep Dru under wraps. By1907 the liner Mauretania was able to cross the Atlantic in 4.5 days, so far nothing faster existed but Spike found he could control his lady’s fits and starts that long at least. There were plenty of people in steerage for feeding on too and most weren’t well documented or missed.

 

At last Spike’s dreams of seeing the New World, the “Wild West” promised by Buffalo Bill all those years ago might be further than the harbor of New York, but it was all in reach after they landed.

 

It seemed he and Dru weren’t the only evil to migrate westward. Rumor after rumor that Slayers were popping up here in America flew in the demon world. Seems the Powers were focusing on this new land and demonkind who lived there and giving the old world a break.

 

For Dru, there were large numbers of immigrant children. Many had to work at an age that horrified Buffy. Their brief lives were already so miserable that death on the fangs of the vampiress after being cosseted and played with almost seemed a blessing.

 

Spike found plenty of his preferred victims along the docks and the pubs catering to the working classes. Fights were easy to start and like a flash-fire soon provided all the mayhem he could hope to create. Life was good and the city large enough for a pair of vampires to elude capture or notice if they kept their heads and they did.

 

***

 

It was there in New York that Spike stumbled on Ragtime and Jazz and fell in love. Buffy was amused to find that his catnip was music, the newer, fresher, the better. Spike loved the syncopation and the seeming lack of rules of this new music. He thrilled to the raw emotion of the blues singers too. It took a bit of doing but he had finally convinced Drusilla that some humans should live unmolested because they make the world better, more beautiful and interesting.

 

He’d even struck up more than one friendship with the musicians, singers, and writers struggling to live their art.

 

Buffy found herself a bit depressed watching how they lived. Surprisingly what depressed her wasn’t the blood and the killing...that she had expected. They were vampires after all and that’s what vampires did. No, what depressed her was seeing what these two could choose NOT to do. They could live around humans and not murder them, could laugh and talk and drink and be with them without flashing a fang.

 

Neither Spike nor Dru had a soul yet they could control their demon nature by choice. Buffy remembered Angel and how he couldn’t control his demon to even kiss her when he had a soul!

 

She remembered how essential his soul was to make him ever be anything other than a monster. There was no way Angelus without that soul could live among humans openly in their company without there eventually being piles of bodies.

 

She remembered the truce instigated by Spike when Angelus was intent on destroying the world. He wanted the world, complete with human entertainments and pleasures, to continue. It wasn’t just protecting a food source. He hadn’t even mentioned the happy-meals part until the last in his list of why he wanted Angelus stopped.

 

He could be trusted with that truce too. Somehow she had known it even then. When Spike gave his word he lived up to it.

 

She had seen plenty now where Spike’s ability to love was on display too. Sure it was all directed towards his batty girlfriend but it was real and it was self-sacrificing too. Angel’s argument that a demon couldn’t love without a soul was clearly nonsense.

 

She had known that and somehow forgotten it. She used that knowing at least once when she stopped Spike from killing all those kids in the club just by threatening Dru. She had known it would do the trick and it had. Without love, selfless love, her threats to stake Dru would have meant nothing.

 

That is what depressed her. How could Spike and Dru be this way and not Angel? She’d heard about a few other vampires too while watching this horror production of “This is Your Life, William the Bloody”. Was it that Angel just lacked the ability altogether? Was HE the odd vampire out? Even Darla had displayed the occasional sentimental emotions. Had Angel even with the soul ever loved her? Since that soul wasn’t his own...just who had it been that had loved her?

 

Without his curse of a soul, Angelus could love no one and nothing except indulging his evil desires. The closest he came to anything bordering on affection was his relationship to Darla and Buffy wondered how much of that came from her being his sire and her skills in the bedroom.

 

Sometimes it hurt to think.

 

*** 

 

It also hurt seeing Spike boast about his Slayer kill. Somehow she couldn’t keep from taking it personally. True that in the real world they weren’t remotely friends. Still after all this time watching his life from the major events to at least quick glimpses of all the mundane, she felt she knew him. It was strange thinking he didn’t know her, not really.

 

Listening to him recount his win to an appreciative F’Waald demon over drinks in the Bowery set her teeth on edge. He was going on and on about how difficult the battle had been, the clever moves the girl had made before he finally bested her. He’d pointed to the scar on his eyebrow, a permanent reminder of the fight to the death.

 

That was when it hit her. That’s what it had been, a fight to the death. Either the little Chinese Slayer or Spike was doomed to die. Buffy knew from her own training that even had Spike not sought out the girl just coming into contact with the Slayer was going to result in that exact situation. Slayers slew vampires. Spike was a vampire. Ipso facto one was going to die while the other would live. It was like war with both of them soldiers just on other sides.

 

She also noticed that Spike didn’t really talk about any other people that he killed. He wasn’t embarrassed or anything like that but it was clear that those deaths were different. They were sport or feeding. Only his battle with the Slayer caused the bragging.

 

He hadn’t been caught out by the Slayer and forced to fight to stay alive. He hadn’t run or hidden. He’d looked for the best warrior the other side had to offer, one born to end him. He’d fought her fairly as an equal and it hadn’t been easy. Buffy reminded herself of all the girls he’d not just given a pass to but even tried to help train.

 

She remembered some old movie she’d seen with her mom about gladiators in Greece or Rome or one of those places with hot guys all oiled up but wearing dresses. Two fighters went into the arena but only one survived. That wasn’t murder. That wasn’t feeding. That was the source of his pride.

 

She would never be comfortable thinking about it. She’d always be disturbed when she did think about it. She was connected with all the girls that came before her after all. Still, the part of her that had come to know Spike and care was glad he was the victor. In a weird way, she was glad that the Slayer had died in a battle against someone who at least respected her not one who just got lucky.

 

Buffy tried her best to turn off her brain at that point. Too many thinky-thoughts for her comfort. Too many questions about Angelus, about Spike, about good and evil and black and white. Life was far too complicated and everything she learned just added to those complications.

 

***

Spike had located a Slayer! In fact he and Dru had just dined on her neighbor and taken his room in the boarding house across the hall from her. Arabella Gish lived in Brooklyn. She was a plain-faced little thing with a somber expression but better than average moves. She’d already racked up quite a number of vampires and demons that had been running rampant in the area.

 

She was also a student nurse!

 

“A Slayer with a career?” Spike was gobsmacked. “Wonder if it’s just part of the whole do-gooder package?”

 

Dru stopped brushing her hair and stared off as if giving his question the most serious consideration. “No smell of grease for this one but the men still won’t share their pudding!” She looked disgusted.

 

“Well, there is that,” Spike agreed without having a clue what she actually meant.

 

Dru shook herself and looked a bit more in the present. “A girl ‘as needs to meet. Could be a shopkeeper I suppose but not many let a girley do honest work.”

 

Spike gave that a bit of thought. He’d never considered that a Slayer might need to make a living. Seemed unfair really. Already had full-time employment keeping the world safe and whole after all. No easier way to have a Slayer die quickly than to have one too tired for a proper fight. Didn’t make sense to him that the Council didn’t support them. From what he’d seen in London they were all drawing a decent salary!

 

As he watched the girl go off to do her duty while trying to get a decent education he felt himself feeling an odd sense of pity that morphed into mercy. There was no way Arabella was going to survive long and it wasn’t for lack of skill or training. He might help train a chit but supporting one to keep her energy levels up was far beyond anything he’d ever consider!

 

“Maybe we’ll give this one a pass, pet. She’s got the skills but comes in most evenings already drained. No real challenge. Maybe the next one will be more the thing.”

 

They moved the next evening.

 

***

Europe was gearing up for war. Some Archy Duke was killed by a guy in some country that Buffy had never heard of before and everyone was talking about war. The light bulb did finally go off and Buffy remembered that this was the first World War, the big one that changed everything!

 

‘No way Spike and Dru will miss that,’ Buffy figured. ‘If nothing else I’ll get great grades in history when I get back. Might even change my major!’

 

To her surprise and Dru’s disappointment, Spike had no desire to return to Europe. He went off on some tirade about not getting caught up in human-made carnage. “‘S nothin’ but a bunch of cousins usin’ an excuse to carve up the map more to their likin’ while letting decent folk pay for it in blood and sufferin’”

 

Spike remembered well how Anne had suffered while his father had followed the drum. He remembered the shell of the man who returned too. How he was partly dead years before the grim reaper finally got around to collecting him. Vampires were evil but war was a whole other level and they were waged by soul-having humans!

 

“All those Kings and Queens are Old Victoria’s grandkiddies and they’re as bloodthirsty as any vamp. Got no desire to go wallow in their filth.”

 

“My boy sounds like that Emma Goldman woman what just got put in prison for trying to keep people from registering for that draft.” Dru was remarkably lucid. “Read some of ‘er pamphlets about all sorts of tasty subjects. Makes them all nervous and angry. Against war, for free love, doesn’t believe in any god and thinks men loving men is just fine.”

 

“She’s no suffragette, Dru. She’s an anarchist. Lives to stir the soup.”

 

“We could turn ‘er once she’s out of prison,” Dru licked her lips. “Make a fine vampire!”

 

“Not waitin’ for her to be released from Blackwell Island just to make another vampire with the same instincts as your sire Dru. I’m thinking we’ll see what else is out there to the West.”

 

“So no war and no new dolly for Princess,” Dru was disappointed until he pointed out that they were perfectly capable of creating their own fields of blood without the competition of war or an unstable troublemaker joining the family.

 

For the first time he understood why Angelus had been so irritated with his own brand of troublemaking.

 

*** 

 

Buffy didn’t get a crash course in World War I but she did get plenty of immersion in modern American jazz as Spike followed the music that had bewitched him from New York to points west finally landing in Chicago just in time to discover that fate had handed him yet another Slayer for the taking.

 

Dorothy Singers would have been a brilliant opponent if it hadn’t been for the unfortunate situation of her having a Watcher even more mad than Dru on a bad day.

 

It also didn’t help matters that Miss Singers was celebrating her eighteenth birthday the “traditional” Council way just hours before Spike had located where she could be found.

 

He arrived just in time to see the cowardly group of Watchers carrying off her body and tsking about having to locate the next girl.

 

He would have been as depressed as the war-deprived Dru having just missed his second Slayer if he hadn’t found himself in a dark cafe listening to a voice that was like warm brandy on a cold night. He fell in love instantly.

 

Miss Bessie Smith could sing the blues like no other. Her rich, smooth, voice reached right in and clenched the listener's heart, pumping emotion like blood so that even a vampire felt that organ swell.

 

While Spike fell headlong in love with the lady’s voice, Dru fell headlong into her bed. There was no way either vampire had any desire to end the life of the sultry chanteuse.

 

Chicago was a good place to settle for a while.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The phrase, “voice like warm brandy on a cold night” came from one of the comments on a Bessie Smith vid. It was perfect and I shamelessly stole it for this chapter.
> 
> https://youtu.be/dIEXAOjWAWA
> 
>  
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bessie_Smith
> 
>  
> 
> https://youtu.be/aVmRkngg1ps
> 
>  
> 
> Emma Goldman was real as is Blackwell island prison (now Roosevelt island and not a prison). Many a famous name was incarcerated there over the years. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Emma_Goldman


	20. Chapter 20

[](https://imgur.com/n6yeom0)

Chapter 20

 

Buffy was still enjoying seeing people’s faces again. Everyone wandering around with face masks both in Europe and the U.S. had been creepy. It was like the whole world was suddenly filled with bank robbers or surgeons. ‘And aren’t they the same thing?’ She remembered how her Aunt had struggled to pay for Celia’s hospital bills long after having to bury her little girl.

 

“Who knew the flu was such a big deal?”

 

The Spanish flu had been everywhere after WWI ended. More people had died from it than in the war. A third of the whole world’s population had died and many thought the world was ending what with a global war then followed by a plague like few had ever imagined. Hard to believe it was just the flu!

 

“Now everyone expects you to still go to school or work when you have the flu.”

 

Everywhere they had traveled on their way around the U.S. there had been victims. It even made hunting harder for Spike and Dru for many reasons. Fewer people out and about for one and the need to wear those masks in public or risk public health officials trying to corner and quarantine them. The last thing they needed was a well-intentioned doctor noting the lack of a heartbeat! Being already pale while in a world suffering a pandemic made them as much to be feared as when they let out their bumpies!

 

It was over now, everyone either dead or immune at last, but it had left a forever impression.

 

With all the death and illness, the world seemed ready to party.

 

***

 

Buffy hated to admit it but she was a little jealous of Drusilla. Part of it was how attentive Spike was to Dru’s every whim. No matter how little she seemed to give back to him it was like he made a meal of her crumbs. None of Buffy’s past boyfriends had ever treated her that way and when she didn’t play them up sweet they certainly didn’t just accept it! Okay, there had only been Pike and Angel and that one disaster with Parker but still...

 

Buffy also wished she had an actual body because as good as Dru looked in the whole flapper getup, Buffy knew that she could totally rock that style! Who knew fringe and beads could be so hot?

 

Apparently Spike did because he was loving the look on his princess. He’d kept her out of those long nightgown looking things that she’d always favored and saw to it that she dressed to the nines. “See,” Buffy crowed to herself, “Still queen of the pop culture lingo. Dru’s get-up was the cat’s meow!”

 

They were regulars at a lot of clubs, many times they were the only white faces in the crowd. Aside from that, they actually fit in well.

 

They never fed in the same neighborhood where they played either.

 

With the Great Lakes Naval base nearby, there were plenty of sailors on leave just begging for a fight. Spike had learned that by simply humming a few bars of the Marine Hymn he could wind their clocks and create enough havoc to fulfill his need for massive brawls. Usually an unlucky one or two wound up dinner, while dozens found themselves spending time in the brig with a story no one would believe.

 

Society might be headed for a “Great Depression” but Dru and Spike were having the time of their lives. Chicago was nearly as appealing as New York had been.

 

***

 

Spike literally ran into Darla in Jackson Park, specifically beneath the raised right arm of the statue ‘The Republic’ that was nearly as old as Spike himself, well the original was at least. He had been musing about missing the great World’s Fair in ‘93 because his elders had shown little interest in such things back in the day. As he looked at the smaller replica of the gilded bronze original he accidentally backed right into her.

 

“Watch where you’re walking you idiot.” Ahhh, the remembered dulcet tones of Darla!

 

Spike smirked and pretended he wasn’t happy to see her alive and undusty. “What brings you to this cesspool? Thought we’d seen the last of you long ago and far away.”

 

Darla quirked a brow, “Where’s your batty other half?”

 

“Dru is enjoyin’ some huntin’ over at the university. I’m amusin’ myself takin’ in the sights.”

 

Darla shook her head, “Of course you are. You do realize tourism is for humans don’t you?”

 

“Ergo a perfectly intelligent thing for a predator to take up if you ask me.”

 

Darla laughed. The boy was annoying as ever but still could be amusing.

 

“So you are still together and in one piece?”

 

Spike gave her a look that showed he was questioning her sanity for even asking.

 

“Never mind.” Darla shook her head. “You made me lose sight of my dinner. I should be angry but he looked a bit stringy and tough. Maybe I’ll join Dru and find a drunken Frat boy.”

 

“I’m sure she’ll save you a few.”

 

The two began the short walk to the campus. Spike had a good idea where to locate his beloved. She’d be right chuffed to see family again.

 

Darla had no trouble thinning the herd by a couple of idiots just before they spotted Dru finishing off her meal. Spike was already sated and more interested in finding out what Darla had been up to. He was also curious about Angelus and if anyone would have a clue about his doings it would be his sire.

 

“Grandmummy!” Dru had been every bit as excited as Spike had thought she would be. “The Pixies all said you’d be ‘ere! Daddy too.”

 

Spike was miffed that his darling hadn’t said a word to him about that. Maybe she had feared he’d want to head far away if Angelus was in the area.

 

“He was here but he’s moved on.”

 

Dru pouted.

 

“So the two of you hooked back up?” Spike always felt that if Angelus ever had any loyalty it was to Darla.

 

“Not really. I ran into him a few months ago moping around. He’s absolutely no fun at all any longer. Some woman practically served herself up on a platter after he saved her mutt from becoming roadkill. All he did was yell at her then he ran off as if Mephistopheles himself were on his tail,” Darla rolled her eyes. “It was embarrassing.”

 

“When did the two of you come across the pond?” Spike wondered if Darla and Angelus had regrouped quickly or if the pair had played it solo for a bit. Buffy was interested in the answer too.

 

“I’ve been here since we parted company. Angelus showed up not long after but I doubt he even knew I was here.” She snorted, “He came in via Ellis Island as if he was a regular Spud immigrating to the New World!”

 

“So he’s still bug shaggin’ crazy then?”

 

Darla looked pointedly at Dru and raised a brow before answering. “He’s still … encumbered,” she hedged. “He scares off the cattle with his sour expressions. Mostly avoids humans and God only knows what he’s been feeding on.”

 

‘Wait,’ Buffy thought. ‘Wouldn’t he be off doing good deeds? Trying to get all redeemed?’

 

“I had some thought he was back in the saddle with some bodies I read about in the local rag. Had Angelus’ stamp all over ‘em.”

 

Darla laughed, “Honestly I had hoped so too but no. That was Penn. He’s such a copy-cat! Learned everything from Angelus and still mimic’s his style. The only dead giveaway is Penn’s signature. He signs his art.”

 

Spike waited for her to continue. He vaguely remembered this name coming up once before and knew the vampire being discussed was related in some way.

 

“Big brother likes to burn ‘em,” Dru nodded.

 

“Big cross on the right cheek just before he drains them. Comes from his Puritan background I suppose,” Darla agreed.

 

“So that why you’re here in Chicago?”

 

“Just passing through. I’m headed west. The Master has some grand plans for a little town with a Hellmouth. I think he’s planning something world changing and he wants me at his side. There’s a lot of planning and preparation for the kind of magic he’s going to use so we need to be in place.” Darla looked at the two in speculation. “It’s about time you met him yourself, William.”

 

Spike had heard plenty about Darla’s sire and had no interest in toadying to any bat faced megalomaniac any day soon. “Appreciate the offer, Ducks but Dru and I were headed the other direction. Hear there’s a new Slayer in New York City again and I need another notch on my belt.”

 

Darla did laugh then. “You never change, well not the basics anyway. I’ve heard of her. I think her Watcher must be a cat, heard his name is Mr. Whiskers!”

 

“Lovely little kitty,” Dru murmured. “Not ready for petting though.”

 

“They rarely are precious,” Spike agreed. “Still, I live in hope.”

 

“Well, when you’re all done chasing your whale this time, Ahab, come out to California and join us. I know he’ll be delighted to see Dru again. He could even use her sight to further his plans.”

 

Darla walked off into the slight fog.

 

“We won’t be going, will we?” Dru whined. “Not our time to play in the sun.” She looked at Spike with clear eyes. “Not your time for a New York dolly either.” She turned and headed toward their hotel. Knowing her wicked boy he’d be wanting to leave sooner rather than later. “Daddy’s not ‘ere and mummy is leaving. The Master’s not pretty so we may as well go.”

 

Spike grinned in delight. He had feared he’d have to plead to keep Dru from wanting to join Darla. He was enjoying life without the other vampires far too much to get pulled into some scheme or another for some pompous arsehole calling himself the Master as if he didn’t use his fangs to feed just like every other vampire!

 

“Fate it is,” Dru smiled. “Big country and yet we meet mummy and just missed daddy too! ‘e’ll come back to me when the sunshine ‘as ‘er way.”

 

Somehow knowing Dru’s beloved daddy was somewhere on this side of the world tainted Spike’s enjoyment of America. Maybe it was time to head back to the old world for a while, give the old geezer time to dust or move on. They’d stop in New York, he’d kill himself another Slayer and they’d book passage on something decent back to Europe.

 

*** 

 

Spike and Dru hadn’t been in New York but a day or two when Dru dragged Spike to meet an old friend of hers. “Glith-roo is ever so old, ‘e’s as old as Grandaddy!”

 

The Codger demon squirmed in embarrassment at the introduction. His droopy skin made his facial expression nearly impossible to read. Whatever his history with Drusilla had remained a mystery but he was a congenial host at least. “Know a nice place for the two of you to nest if you plan to stay a while.” 

 

Buffy was puzzled yet again. She had read the Council’s books about vampires and demons… okay, she had half-listened to Giles tell her about the Council’s books on them. ‘I thought vampires avoided demons unless it was to kill them for territory or something like that?’

 

Here was Dru yucking it up with a guy who looked like the oldest human-ish person she could imagine. ‘Seriously! He kinda looks human if the human was all saggy and bald. Maybe like Yoda.’ Dru seemed to really like the old guy though and Spike found him amusing so Buffy got a birds-eye view of the kind of demon society she had heard of in rumor but never seen. The demons who mainly avoided humans or tried to pass and weren’t always looking for ways to kill people or start an apocalypse.

 

The apartment Glith-roo found for them had a view of the East River and was in a respectable neighborhood. Dru and Spike made sure to do their hunting far enough away from home to not draw attention to themselves. The small community accepted the two vampires based on Glith-roo’s recommendation. It seemed that Dru’s second sight was highly regarded by the others even if it wasn’t easy to follow at times. Dru made many a demon happy with a Tarot card reading.

 

The current slayer, Ardita O’Reilly, left the peaceful community alone and they begged Spike to leave well enough alone with the Slayer, not rock the boat. Buffy could see that Spike was mightily tempted to hunt the girl down and test his skills once more but he managed to show unexpected patience and cooperation with his new friends.

 

Still, there was a lot to enjoy in the city just as before. Even the imposition of Prohibition wasn’t stopping the party or night-life. Spike laughed at the futile efforts to stop alcohol consumption by the authorities. “All they manage to do is get rid of some truly bad American beer when they bust up the barrels.” Alcohol continued to flow mostly unabated from smuggling across the Great Lakes from Canada to homemade brew in many a private home. Petty criminals who once only preyed on their own communities began to organize and become an international network of mobsters.

 

One of the more human-like demons in their social circle was even dating an actual Zigfield girl! She was beautiful and spunky and not put-off at all by the more demon looking friends of her fella. Thanks to Sophie they all got a chance to see Broadway at its most decadent and glamorous.

 

For Buffy, it was like seeing all her mom’s favorite old musicals come to life right in front of her. The costumes were in full color though instead of the black and white and the spectacle almost too much to take in unlike the small square of the TV screen. If it hadn’t been for the pre-theater snacks Buffy had to watch her vampires indulge in Buffy would have enjoyed it completely.

 

The speakeasies were the best. There was a bit of a thrill with all the secret knocks and passwords getting into the private clubs where the old cafe society continued its wild dance in the face of unenforceable and stupid laws. Buffy seemed to remember bits about this time period from her history class and knew things would eventually change but in places like New York life pretty well continued on as always with just a few minor alterations.

 

***

 

Glith-roo came in to the local community center waving a tin proudly. “Got a bootleg copy of that flicker we heard tell of! Not set to show in the theaters until who knows when but we’ve got our own copy. Sophie knows a guy with a projector too so it looks like it’s private showing time!”

 

Buffy was doubled over with laughter along with the demon audience. It beat any of the actual comedies by Buster Keaton they’d seen and it wasn’t even a comedy. Nosferatu was supposed to be terrifying and Buffy supposed it might be to the general public. To an audience of demons, vampires and an invisible Slayer though it was a hoot.

 

Spike began snorting from almost the beginning. “Deathbird at midnight,” he’d giggled. “Worse poet than I ever was.” Dru snickered at his side.

 

The commentary from the select audience was better than during all the Bollywood films that Buffy had shared and mocked with Xander and Willow in their high school years.

 

Dru sniffled when the heroine grieved for the poor plucked flowers her boyfriend had given to her. “All my flowers die too.” Spike squeezed her hand in sympathy. “‘s fine, poodle. This one bloomed.”

 

The scene when the human cut himself and backed away in overblown terror as Count Orlok stalked towards him caused belly laughs. Dru tsked his bad manners, “‘e’s ‘urt ‘imself. Not right to tempt ‘is ‘ost then cower.”

 

Spike made more fun of how slowly the film vampire walked towards his prey. ‘Walkin’ that slow the git’ll never get fed! A two-year-old could outrun him.”

 

“Maybe ‘e’s just terribly old. Looks a bit like the Master ‘e does and ‘e’s ever so ancient.”

 

The demons all agreed that if all vampires were like the fictional Orlok there wouldn’t be any creature human or otherwise in fear of them.

 

When the movie vampire met his end Spike doubled in laughter. “Window right there you nutter! What kind of sad excuse for a villain are you? Deserve to dust, Orlok, bigger wanker than the one Stoker turned old Drac into!”

 

All in all it was one of the more pleasant evenings Buffy could remember ever spending and it was as a ghost in a room filled with demons and vampires. ‘Huh! What does that say about my social life?’

 

***

 

New York had been a fun experience for Buffy this time, well not counting dinner time that would always disgust and still confuse her. Much as she had come to genuinely like Spike and even Dru she would never be able to turn a blind eye on the killing. She wished she had a way to communicate with them, help them to see that there was another way to live. They had no souls but then Buffy had already seen that a soul wasn’t necessarily the determining factor in character.

 

Watching how they lived after the abandonment by Angelus and then Darla Buffy knew they could be more than just a pair of killers. Spike had it in him to be more man than demon and enough of a strong will to guide Dru along a similar path, Buffy just knew it!

 

The clubs that called to Spike, especially in Harlem, had been filled with music and laughter and, to Buffy’s surprise, plenty of drugs to go along with the free-flowing alcohol. It was the same in all the nightclubs and dance spots no matter the venue really. ‘Huh! I thought mom’s generation invented pot! Maybe it was just a music thing. Some of that classical stuff sounds like they were on drugs when they wrote it!’

 

There was jazz and the blues and cafe society full of bright happy people reveling in this “new” age. It was seductive. Even the new law that made alcohol illegal didn’t stop the party. Seemed like everyone who had a bathtub had plenty of booze. Making it illegal had made it more enticing to many people.

 

“Wow! Seems like telling someone ‘no’ is a great way to have them do it,” Buffy shook her head. Clearly, demons didn’t have a corner on the whole evil is seductive thing.

 

Spike even slipped away for a while to go to some poetry readings even though he never shared any of his own works.

 

Buffy had been stunned the first time she’d seen the vampire pick up a journal and write poetry. Yeah, William had always been scribbling down bits of verse, clever rhymes but Buffy hadn’t expected that interest, that love, to continue once he had a demon in him. She’d wished he had read some of it aloud to see what might inspire a demon to create more than other vampires. Then again, Spike had never done that kind of creating. He killed or sometimes drank and let the person go; he never sired. Maybe Spike would eventually read some of his new stuff at one of the clubs he’d been going to eventually and her curiosity would be sated.

 

Dru had been having more visions than she had in a long while. It was funny in a way seeing the drugged music lovers and musicians listen to her prattle and actually seem to understand.

 

‘Makes sense, I guess. It’s like Dru is in a dream when she sees stuff and they’re in one too,’ Buffy mused. She wondered how Spike, not drugged or in mental la-la land, seemed to get Dru as well as he did. Then again, he was scary good at reading all kinds of people.

 

Buffy remembered saying just that to Angel before he left Sunnydale. She hadn’t understood why Spike seemed to understand her better than anyone else, really get her, but he did and she knew it even then. Seemed she wasn’t that special. He ‘got’ most people. Really saw what made them tick. Maybe he just paid attention.

 

Dru was trying to get Spike to take her back to Europe. She swore the whole world was about to be swallowed whole and no place would be truly safe. Europe held special treats though she had insisted, so much misery and fear to please Spike’s Princess.

 

Spike wasn’t interested in moving on until Dru held out the promise of another Slayer. This one was in Munich. “The monster what’s already a demon without ‘avin’ anyone turn ‘im will be there too but ‘e ‘asn’t any power yet.”

 

Spike wasn’t sure what sort of demon Dru was going on about but the sirens call of another Slayer proved too enticing so off to Europe they went.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N:
> 
> For those who want to “see” and “hear” some of what Buffy is experiencing I’m including bits as we go along. It’s not necessary to click but here if you are interested.
> 
>  
> 
> https://youtu.be/3x1aLAw_xkY The Spanish Flu overview
> 
>  
> 
> https://youtu.be/mZm7qAzpz_A The Golden Lady of Chicago
> 
>  
> 
> The Harlem Renaissance was an intellectual, social, and artistic explosion that took place in Harlem, New York, spanning the 1920s. During the time, it was known as the "New Negro Movement", named after The New Negro, the 1925 anthology edited by Alain Locke. https://youtu.be/KxanL2GB_Jw
> 
> https://youtu.be/M82fXiWRJew
> 
>  
> 
> Speakeasies that can still be seen and enjoyed: https://www.nomadicmatt.com/travel-blogs/prohibition-new-york-city/
> 
>  
> 
> A trio of cool vids on the life and times of NYC during prohibition
> 
>  
> 
> https://youtu.be/LeLJb0dL8VU
> 
> https://youtu.be/3X5yEmqOJrw
> 
> https://youtu.be/FqsAMJEIQ8I
> 
>  
> 
> Florenz Zigfield was all the thing as were his “girls”. Bet you didn’t know that you likely know Florenz’s wife: actress Billie Burke (Glinda the good witch from The Wizard of Oz was his wife).
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ziegfeld_girl
> 
> https://youtu.be/2EtRTOdGT0E
> 
> https://youtu.be/cXs-YkvhPgs
> 
>  
> 
> Nosferatu was released in Germany in 1922 but not in the USA until 1929. It was an unauthorized adaptation of Bram Stoker’s Dracula. Various names and other details were changed from the novel. Stoker's heirs sued over the adaptation, and a court ruling ordered that all copies of the film be destroyed. However, a few prints of Nosferatu survived, and the film came to be regarded as an early masterpiece of cinema. If you want to share in the mocking here is the silent treasure for your amusement https://youtu.be/FC6jFoYm3xs or https://youtu.be/c3lizKN5aNc if you want just a taste.
> 
>  
> 
> New York City 1922 in a few pictures and sounds http://gothamist.com/2012/05/23/21_photos_of_new_york_city_in_1922.php#photo-1
> 
>  
> 
> Codger demons were introduced on Angel in two episodes including Glith-roo in the episode Heartthrob. https://buffy.fandom.com/wiki/Glith-roo


	21. Chapter 21

[](https://imgur.com/B2khHpk)

Chapter 21 

 

***

 

Spike eyed the couple in the lobby of the Hatfield House Hotel where he and Dru had been staying while looking into possible transportation back to Europe. They were obviously upper class but not so high in the instep as to be of any particular note; in short, perfect for their purposes.

 

From the previous evening’s overheard conversation between the couple and the hotel manager Spike had learned that they had booked a decent stateroom on the USS Leviathan that was headed to France, just where they were planning to go. Why not go in style? ‘Don’t mind goin’ as Harry and Millie Carstairs. Lots better than travelin’ cargo like the last trip across the Atlantic.’

 

Making a quick dinner of the luckless couple and relieving them of their tickets and other necessary documents proved to be remarkably easy. The two were newly-weds and far too caught up in one another to notice the danger until it was far too late.

 

Dru pouted a bit when Millie’s clothing proved too large for her reed-thin form but most of her own wardrobe fit nicely in the steamer trunks once the late Mrs.Carstairs frocks had been removed. She perked up a bit when she poked through the many items in the jewelry pouch and cosmetic bags, cooing like a child at Christmas at her new acquisitions.

 

As Dru packed, Spike augmented their cash at a back-room gambling establishment ensuring that this trip would be one of luxury for a change. He’d heard that the ship had a world-class Chef for those traveling on the higher end. The ship orchestra had an excellent reputation as well. He was looking forward to the trip even if it had been mostly at Dru’s urging.

 

***

 

“Huh,” Buffy shrugged as she looked around the stateroom. “Not quite like Rose’s room in Titanic but still hella nice!’ Buffy indulged in a brief daydream that included poor artists and bored rich girls, casting herself in the leading lady role and found herself startled to realize her “Jack” looked far too much like a certain blonde vampire for her comfort.

 

The vampire in question was pacing in agitation and raging at a smirking Dru.

 

“What bleedin’ fool turns a Slayer?” Spike stormed to and fro across the stateroom. He was furious knowing Dru had played him for a fool as well as deeply disappointed in her and in losing yet another chance at a Slayer.

 

Long before they had weighed anchor, his dreams of besting his second Slayer were already dashed. Britta Kessler wasn’t a Slayer any longer but one of the undead herself. Her Watcher had abandoned her in a theater filled with vampires. It was Herr Lightermann’s bad fortune to be captured by those same vampires and offered as the first meal to his late charge.

 

The demon community was abuzz about the Slayer turned vampire. After killing the Watcher who had abandoned her, she had killed every vamp who had been part of the nest that had sired her. She’d then turned her wrath on the demon and vampire population at large leaving none alive among those who were not quick enough to flee to safety.

 

Britta had become a terrifying predator that no demon had wanted to encounter; a horror tale told to young spawn and a cautionary tale to vampires as a whole.

 

Spike lamented that he hadn’t had a chance to hone his skills on the vampire- vampire slayer. Seems Britta had no desire to live forever and had ended her short unlife by her own choosing. Spike hoped she had enjoyed, however briefly, her last sunrise.

 

Spike had learned this sad ending to his particular dream from a gossipy Lister demon who had managed to pass as human and was working as a purser on the ship. The friendly demon had been delighted to recognize the “Carstairs” as fellow demons. So few rubbed shoulders with the “better classes” They tipped well too.

 

“Only agreed to go back to the Old World ‘cause the bint was there!” He pointed an accusatory finger at Dru. “YOU told me my next Slayer was waitin’ for me there!”

 

Dru giggled. “Said a vampire would get lucky, didn’t say you.” She stretched and grinned. “Wanted to go see all the rivers of blood. Princess wants all the treats you didn’t let me ‘ave last time.”

 

“You tricked me!” Spike was seriously provoked. He had been loving the States having had his fill of Europe while traveling with Angelus and Darla the first twenty years of his new life as a vampire.

 

“Naughty boys need to give their mummy’s what they ask for then mummy doesn’t ‘ave to spread breadcrumbs.”

 

It was unusual, Buffy had rarely seen Spike deny Dru much of anything, but he really hadn’t wanted to head back to Europe, not until Dru implied he’d get his next Slayer if they went right away. He had been expertly manipulated.

 

***

 

Watching them dine in the Ritz-Carlton next to tycoons and debutantes was like suddenly being in a film for Buffy. It was all elegance and perfect manners. Spike was putting on his best “William” as he chatted up other diners over the fish course.

 

“I’d stay away from Germany if I were you,” the stuffy man who reminded both Buffy and Spike of his Uncle George at his worst warned. “Not too popular there at the moment. Take this ship,” he paused to snicker, “We certainly did. Spoils of war she is. Was the pride of Hamburg as the Vaterland ‘til we confiscated her and gave her a new name and a face-lift! Still with all our plundering and spoil taking we’ve got nothing on you Brits or the French! They’re still boiling over the Treaty they were pushed into signing. No, not too popular over there.”

 

Spike nodded cordially and let the man pontificate. “Beggared the lot of them! Won’t be off starting more wars for a good, long, time. No, I’d avoid those countries. Italy isn’t too bad, hungry for tourists, or their money anyway, even if the tourists are the conquering heroes they most hate.” He stopped to let the busboy remove his plate. “Paris is the place to go. Lots of prosperity. It’s attracting all the brightest and the best. Even the diplomats from the new League of Nations come over from Geneva to take in the pleasures if you know what I mean,” he gave Spike a wink.

 

By the end of the meal even Buffy would have been fine with Spike draining the snobby bore.

 

Buffy was impressed with how Spike and Dru did manage to feed their real needs on the trip. No draining steerage passengers this time. Dru’s thrall proved amazingly useful as the pair relied on it and selective catch and release to appease their needs without drawing attention to themselves. Fortunately Dru was in a stable state of mind and didn’t balk at the necessity of leaving their victims alive. It seemed getting her way went a long distance in keeping her in a good frame of mind.

 

***

 

Spike leaned on the rail smoking and gazing at the vast expanse of ocean. A young man, barely out of his teens sidled up asking for a light for his own. “Can’t believe I’m going back just after the U.S. Army finished rowing me across this pond taking me back home,” the lad chuckled.

 

Spike, who had been considering making him a late night snack decided he wasn’t really hungry and a bit of conversation that wasn’t filled with pompous boasting might be an even better nightcap. “That so? Take it you fought in the big war then?”

 

“4th Infantry and lived to tell,” the boy/man smiled widely. He offered his hand to Spike. “Plain old Ezra Toomy now, no rank.”

 

Spike introduced himself as Harry Carstairs. “Why you headed back? States that way,” he pointed back the toward the ship’s wake.

 

“Well, that’s the funny thing. The whole time I was fighting, trying to stay alive, I couldn’t wait to get back home.” The young man shuddered. “Have to tell you it was scary over there,” he nodded out towards their destination. “Mustard gas was the worst. Served under Maj. Gen. George Cameron in the second Battle of the Marne. Had my fill of war. Anyway, prayed every night to just get home alive. Funny thing though,” he confided, “got off that troop ship and started making my plans to head back to the farm in Kansas and got feet as cold as any bridegroom about to marry the town’s ugly girl.”

 

Spike laughed. There was something so unaffected about the lad that he found himself enjoying the companionship.

 

“Always thought I’d up and marry Helen Palmer. Her folks have the farm next to ours. They grow soybeans and we grow mainly wheat. Anyway seemed written in the stars you know, all laid out for me. Then they started that stupid war and I went off like a good patriot and enlisted. Thought it’d be all glory and exciting. It was all blood and shit and death though.”

 

Spike thought of his own father and all the changes in him from before and after his encounter with mankind’s favorite bloodsport.

 

“Guess it’s like that song,” Ezra continued. “Sure you’ve heard some version of it. ‘How you Gonna Keep ‘Em Down On The Farm’. Well, sir, I tell you it hit me like a ton of bricks. There I was headed back to the farm and I never did get to see old Paree. Got a bit lucky with the dice, bought myself a ticket and here I am.”

 

Spike could see a bit of William in the lad. His future all but written in stone until something life changing happened to turn it all sideways. Ezra’s war was his Dru.

 

“Lot’s of world to see,” Spike nodded. “Plenty of others to grow the wheat.”

 

“Now, see, that’s just how I see it! Now if only my Pa’ll feel the same.”

 

“You’re a man now. Get to make your own choices. Your father’ll just have to adjust to that if he hasn’t already. If he’s a decent sort he’ll be there ready and waiting if you decide to see if Helen and the farm are something you want. If not, he’s still your father. Can’t stop loving a child just because they strike out on their own. Natural thing to do after all.”

 

Buffy smiled. Spike really was a decent guy to talk to sometimes it seemed. He was able to be sympathetic and knew just what a person needed to hear.

 

Ezra brightened immediately. “Yeah! Pa’s a good one! He’ll understand and it’s not like I’ll never see him again. Thanks, Mr. Carstairs, you’re a real swell fella. Glad we met.”

 

Spike laughed. If only Ezra knew how lucky he was that he was meeting Spike when he wasn’t hungry and when Dru wasn’t with him to decide to change his fate far more than Paris ever would.

 

“Have a good life kid.”

 

***

 

“The monster stirs, my Spike,” Dru announced. ‘’E ‘as ever such nasty plans. Taste of blood and licorice they do.”

 

“Where’s this monster, poodle? Do you need your Spike to kill the beast for you?” Spike nuzzled Dru’s neck and ran a hand up her thigh.

 

Dru giggled and squirmed. “My wicked lad would try to change the world for ‘is princess but the music ‘as already begun and it’s too late to change those partners. Too early for others too,” she glared challengingly at Buffy.

 

“Well we can’t have that,” Spike agreed playfully. “Not polite to be too early or too late. May be dead but still have my manners,I do, unlike some.”

 

Spike and Dru had taken to Paris like it had been designed just for them. His French was only the slightest bit rusty and with what seemed like the whole world converging on the city there was always someone speaking a language that someone else could understand easily.

 

History would call it the “Lost Generation”, the post-war survivors looking for life in the new world they’d birthed and trying to forget the old one just passed. Those who could afford it looked for ways to drink and dance their cares away and night clubs were popping up everywhere it seemed. American jazz was all the rage and sex, in every variety, was a given.

 

In short, it was right up Spike’s alley! Post-war Europe was well suited to a vampire… lots of vampires from the look of it. Like carrion eaters, they preyed on the desperate and damaged.

 

Spike and Dru continued their normal eating habits that they had indulged in except while on board the luxury liner. Buffy had learned to close her eyes to it for the most part. Dru had begun to focus far more on the young and tender than she had in a long time and Spike was having more trouble keeping her from indulging than he had in the past. Still, he had her back and when she was determined to go after the many recent orphans he would fight off those who would destroy his beloved. He didn’t enjoy it, but had been unable to find a way to deter her.

 

Ever since they debarked from the Leviathan she had slipped more and more into her moods. She had visions and alternated between glee and depression, at war within herself. Miss Edith seemed highly disturbed by what the Pixies were whispering while Dru salivated.

 

Dru’s overindulgence in children had drawn too much attention to her and Spike had insisted she needed to change her appearance for safety’s sake since she was far too striking in appearance to be overlooked forever.

 

Dru had hated the peroxide blonde of her hair when Spike had first bleached it out. Her blue eyes and fair skin made it look fairly natural but she despised it. 

 

“Thinking ‘bout a change myself, luv,” Spike announced. He ran his hand through his honeyed locks. “Considerin’ somethin’ sleek. Maybe black like my soul… if I had one that is.”

 

Dru twined her fingers through his curls. “Like Valentino? ‘E’s ever so yummy.” Dru’s eyes lit up with an idea, “Can we eat ‘im?”

 

Spike sighed. “Pet, he’s all the way in California. Long way to go for a meal when there’s plenty of tasty people runnin’ all about France.” He grinned then tackled Dru back on to the bed. “What say I just be your own personal Sheik, eh? You can pretend I’m the poofter.” He began to nuzzle his way down her throat headed for her small, firm, breasts.

 

***

 

Buffy turned back towards the couple after counting a fair number of minutes past the shouted completion of their coupling. She was prepared to watch the cuddling that made up the afterglow. It was always tender and touched her but she always tried to avoid the show itself. She didn’t mind a glimpse or… three at Spike’s chiseled body but she wasn’t comfortable with a live sex show.

 

Spike was usually ready to go again fairly soon but most times Dru lost interest after once. Buffy got the feeling that Angelus had damaged her too badly to fully enjoy the sort of lovemaking Spike preferred to indulge in.

 

When Spike gave in and added enough pain to her pleasure she was more willing to have multiple encores. The trouble was that Spike really, really, didn’t enjoy inflicting pain on his princess. He was willing to let her do the bloodletting that she seemed to require to really let loose sexually. It wasn’t that he was into pain, he was simply used to it, and preferred to feel it than to give it, unlike her sire.

 

Dru was staring at the ceiling, probably listening to the stars as she drew patterns of blood on Spike’s bare back with her razor-sharp fingernails. 

 

“The little monster wants to play, but it’s not ‘is time on the round-about. No sweets for ‘im yet. Locked up in the nursery for bein’ a bad boy, but the nanny won’t take the pen away. ‘E’ll have ‘is say and pour on the coals.”

 

Dru had that dreamy look in her eyes as she listened and tried to relay her information to Spike. “Beer hall wasn’t a good place to plan nasty deeds. Walls ‘ave ears and mouths tell tales.”

 

Spike smiled and kissed her just above her navel. “Very true, beloved.” Spike hadn’t a clue what Dru was going on about. Judging by her slip into the future or a dream or whatever it was that had caught her fancy he realized their tryst had ended for the night.

 

Dru was caught up in a vision. She started to moan and squirm. “Bones and ash, my Spike, bones, and ash,” she actually whimpered. “Sick ones first, then the rest. The Pikey’s, the ‘oly door knockers, Molly house boys, Poles, and Slavs then ‘is true target, the Jews. ‘Ates them ‘e does. Thinks ‘is granny played games with one and made ‘im tainted but tells no tales.”

 

“Who’s that my lovely?” Spike stroked her gently.

 

“The man what’s a monster. ‘E’s ever so evil, just like daddy but ‘e doesn’t need the dark or to ‘ide in shadows. Right in the open ‘e is.”

 

”Are your fairies telling you horror stories again, pet?”

 

“Soon all will see. Scorch the earth before ‘e’s done.” She shuddered. “Leave no pretty poppets to feast on, just kill and burn. Kill and burn. Kill and burn.” She stared off in the distance a silent witness to who knew what horrors.

 

Spike was also silent for a long while. Dru was quite lucid which was rare after she’d had one of her longer visions. Whatever it was she’d seen must have been terrible indeed for her to be so distraught. Clearly, something, or rather someone was on the horizon who would shake up their world.

 

“Where is this monster? Shall your Spike slay the dragon before it breathes fire?” he offered in all sincerity. He would fight Satan himself for his beloved if she wished it, charge into the fires of hell itself if it would give her comfort.

 

“In a cage but they’ll not ‘old ‘im long. Scribble, scribble, scribble… all ‘is nasty plans. ‘is 'struggle', poison for the whole world. Infect them all. Long after ‘e’s just dust like a vampire. Soon the bird will be free from the cage and the keeper will think ‘e can control ‘im, but ‘e can’t. Soon ‘e’ll be ruling all the nests, all the birdies will die.”

 

“Right then,” Spike got up from the bed. “Maybe the Cabaret then. Say there’s a new chanteuse fresh from America worth a listen. Everybody’s ravin ‘bout this Josephine Baker.”

 

Dru shook herself returning to the present and her boy. She growled and returned his smile, “This same flower that smiles today, tomorrow will be dying.” She giggled, “Let’s go pick some flowers, my deadly Knight.”

 

Spike laughed. “You would fixate on that part of the poem. Yes, Let’s gather some rosebuds… those in full bloom though mind you. Don’t feel much like movin’ again so soon.”

 

Buffy shivered. Having the benefit of knowing at least a little history she knew what Dru was seeing, or who. Spike hadn’t snapped to it yet though. Life was still a party for him and without Buffy’s knowledge or Dru’s sight he had no idea that hell could come to earth without it being demons pouring from a Hellmouth to make it so.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter End Notes:  
> The hotel mentioned at the start of this chapter was built in 1901. It is now called the Hotel Deauville (103 E 29th St, New York, in the garment district of NYC). I chose it as a tip of the hat to many a memory. My mother lived there in the 1940s while taking further nursing training at Bellevue hospital for rehabilitative medicine. She was living there when she married my father (in Yonkers). Whenever we visited NYC we stayed there as she remained friends with the (then) owner and several friends from those years. It is now renovated into a lovely boutique hotel that I recommend if you want a bit of history with your stay http://www.hoteldeauville.com/
> 
> How ya gonna keep em down on the farm https://youtu.be/VYflT3h6lCQ
> 
> Leviathan Orchestra https://youtu.be/1kQaRkUh_QM
> 
> New Leviathan ship https://youtu.be/gDQlbLeka50
> 
>  
> 
> The original “latin lover” Rudolph Valentino in “The Sheik” (1921) https://youtu.be/oDaRentuB7g
> 
> Women swooned at his funeral in 1926. There were even suicides. https://www.thevintagenews.com/2017/01/21/when-rudolph-valentino-died-in-1926-over-100000-people-swarmed-the-streets-of-new-york-city-in-riots-during-the-funeral-and-several-women-committed-suicide/
> 
> Paris in the 1920’s https://youtu.be/blw8zJt-Sc0
> 
> https://youtu.be/NMn1-_n4jw0
> 
> "Zelli's Royal Box" nightclub https://youtu.be/38mmdw9f5tg
> 
> Josephine Baker https://youtu.be/UNSEnQNfk9k
> 
>  
> 
> Poem referred to is To the Virgins, to Make Much of Time by Robert Herrick https://www.poets.org/poetsorg/poem/virgins-make-much-time
> 
> with the first stanza reading:
> 
> Gather ye rosebuds while ye may,
> 
> Old Time is still a-flying;
> 
> And this same flower that smiles today
> 
> Tomorrow will be dying.
> 
> Post-WWI Europe (especially Germany) suffered economically in ways that boggle the mind. Some reasons are only coming into widespread awareness in recent years.
> 
> https://www.gingkoedizioni.it/the-starving-of-germany-in-1919/
> 
> Aspects of the treaty of Versailles and policies like the above crushed the economy of the defeated nations. This led to great unrest and resentment that directly led to the rise of the NAZI party. http://www.history.ucsb.edu/faculty/marcuse/classes/33d/projects/1920s/Econ20s.htm


	22. Chapter 22

[](https://imgur.com/DQnITWa)

Chapter 22

***

“Wow! Postwar Paris really was a 'Moveable Feast'! Who knew?” Buffy had hated the book mostly for all the memories that came along with it. Snyder had thrust a copy at her demanding a 2,000-word essay on human values explored in the book during one of her many detentions under the control of that tyrant. ‘Sheeya! Like he even knew what human values even were!’ Still Seeing it, experiencing it even as a ghost was another thing altogether. Oddly enough she knew that now she could easily write far more than 2,000 words on human values just based on her observing her vampire interacting with the humans that peopled his world.

 

Yeah, Spike was still very much a vampire as was Dru. They weren’t on a rampage though. They hunted and fed. But now Buffy was used to seeing that they also laughed, played, attended galleries and parties. She saw that on an average day the only thing that set them apart from humanity was the diet. Neither had indulged in a bloodbath in a long while. She idly wondered if it was a matter of maturity. 

 

Even Dru was more restrained ever since it was just she and Spike on their own. In all honesty, Spike was the one who restrained her but she didn’t fight it too much. He had a way of dealing with his beloved sire, gentle but firm, and it seemed to work for the most part. Spike had also perfected living among human people and not drawing the notice of those most likely to bring them to final death.

 

He had managed to spread his enthusiasms and interests to Dru and even Buffy. Over the years she had been an unseen but still felt on occasion observer. 'Guess I'm kinda background noise.' She had found there were many interests that she had in common with Spike. Life was brighter, had more dimensions with the odd vampire around. All those years and Buffy couldn’t remember being bored even once.

 

One day the scenes and people they were meeting would be detailed in that memoir by Hemingway published after his death. Right now, they were living it.

She hadn’t cared too much for Hemingway’s terse use of language and the scenes and people never really came to life for her just reading his words but, OH, to see it first hand!

 

***

 

Dinner had been a well-heeled gent with a shiny new toy that appealed to Spike. The camera wasn’t the clunky, bulky, type that he and Dru had sat before in the past. This little lovely was easy to point and click. Nicking film was a slight challenge because it was new but lucky for Spike Paris wasn’t hurting financially like most of the world at this point.

 

Spike was chronicling this engaging world his own way by using his pilfered prize. Photos were beginning to fill a small box that contained his few treasures that went with him from move to move. A person, or a vampire, didn’t have to go out to see the world. The world came to Paris and Spike was right in the thick of it while capturing memories to enjoy later at the same time.

 

Buffy had to laugh when Spike met Hemingway himself. The newly published author of ‘A Farewell to Arms’ had failed to impress the vampire and he had told the man so to his face.

 

“Words are to paint pictures, you use too few of them. Like a bloody line drawing,” Spike huffed. He wasn’t jealous of the brash writer but his poetic nature rebelled against the spare use of words that set Hemingway apart from others.

 

The author had enough alcohol in him to allow the “young upstart” to annoy him and fisticuffs ensued. A bit of bloodshed later, followed by another round of fairly decent whiskey and the two agreed that Spike could have all those unused words for his own output and they’d call it even.

 

Spike’s bloody-mindedness and willingness to go balls-to-the-wall in a fight, even against multiple opponents or much larger men, appealed to the writer who fancied himself quite the mans-man. A friendship was born that led to Spike and Dru being drawn into that very ‘feast’ that Buffy had been forced to read about. 

 

Spike’s photographs began to pile up of all the humans he admired and enjoyed far too much to put on the menu. The writers, musicians, and artists and even, to his secret delight, poets found their way in front of his lens. So did the regular people of his adopted city.

 

By hanging out with Spike, Buffy ‘met’ people who had only been names to her before.

 

Yeats, no longer in his prime but still able to argue poetry with the vampire and politics with those who took exception to his approval of Mussolini in Italy could be enthralling. He and Dru had bonded a bit over the occult, an interest the poet had evidently developed after marrying and experimenting with automatic writing.

 

Buffy had to giggle when the couple was introduced to the occultist Aleister Crowley. Buffy remembered Giles droning on about him once, something about dark magic involving his old friend Ethan that she couldn’t remember. She probably wouldn’t have even remembered that much if the picture of the man hadn’t given her the wiggins. The funny part was that Crowley was terrified of Dru and avoided the pair at any gathering where they were in attendance. He didn't even have a clue that Dru and Spike were of the undead, merely that Dru was frightening.

 

Buffy had laughed till she cried when Crowley even tripped over a flower pot in his haste to leave unnoticed when they arrived unannounced at Hemingway’s flat not far from the Luxemburg Gardens. Crowley was called a Satanist by many yet the frail-looking vampiress terrified him more than any possible meeting with Beelzebub.

 

It was at that apartment where Spike met someone he had admired for a while and developed an aversion for nearly as strong as Crowley’s towards Dru. Below the flat was the studio of a major figure in the world of poetry and poets. Ezra Pound and Spike had verbally sparred over Pound’s current notions about the economy of language in poetry. Pound had developed a movement he called imagism that derived from the Asian world of literature, especially Chinese and Japanese poetry that emphasized clarity and precision in word choice and use. William agreed with the concept to a degree. Back in the day, he was always looking for that perfect word to express his feelings.

 

Spike had conceded that his own form of poetry, once seeped in the world of the Romantic Movement was more inclined towards flowery language but he insisted there was precision to be found there as well. “One of my most dreadful efforts got that way because I was looking for the exact word and came up with bloody effulgent,” Spike had confided.

 

Pound considered the situation and failed to see the problem. “Would you say that effulgent reflected the barest essence of what you wished to express?”

 

“Lookin’ back… “ Spike thought back to Cecily with the clear eyes of not wearing rose-colored glasses. “Not even close.”

 

At first, Spike had enjoyed their discussions until Pound began discussing his political leanings, a subject that was taking up more and more of his interest.

 

Spike had also argued rather fiercely with Ezra Pound after a late night of drinking had led to a discussion about the book by Adolph Hitler that Pound had loaned to Spike and that he had finally finished reading. It had been all he could do to slog through ‘Mein Kampf’.

 

“Bunch of whining about how the Jews had ruined his life, how oppressed the tosser had been. Loads of rubbish meant to excuse the lack of accomplishment by the wanker if you ask me.”

 

Pound had been far more in sympathy to the supposed conspiracy by some imagined cabal of Jewish men who ruled of the world.

 

“Seems someone with the wit to recognize great poets before most of the rest of the world notices ‘em should see through that kind of horseshite! If Jews really do secretly rule the world behind the scenes you’d think they would have stopped their people from bein’ killed and run out of everywhere.”

 

“If his ideas are so off the mark, why is Herr Hitler gaining in popularity then? He’s even going to be in the running for the presidency of Germany,” Pound had insisted.

 

“Why should he bother if there’s really a bunch of Jews out to get him that are in charge then?”

 

“You’ll see, that man will change the world!”

 

“Nobody with a brain would be listenin’ to the bloody twat if they weren’t all soddin’ starvin’ and lookin’ for someone to blame.” Spike tossed back another pint and rose from the table in disgust.

 

Spike steered clear of Pound after that conversation. It was hard to listen to his opinions on anything, even poetry, and give them any weight when he had shown himself so woefully ignorant when it came to conspiracies and politics. “Shame, too, loved discussin’ poetry and things of beauty with the bastard.”

 

Dru also gravitated towards those who saw the world as she did. Picasso’s cubism had managed to capture reality in a way that she had felt only she could truly see.

 

She always took part as well as she could in these social settings. Her fey demeanor and puzzling pronouncements seen as dry wit had won her more than a few admirers. Even, much to Spikes sorrow, a lover or two along the way.

 

The closer the next war came it seemed the more divided her spirit. The ‘Miss Edith’ still deep within hated the visions she was receiving...all the carnage, horror and the innocence lost. It reminded her of what she had endured thanks to Angelus, what her loved ones had suffered. The demon though couldn’t wait for the blood to flow and pain to begin. She was pulled in two directions with every whisper from a pixie or vision from the stars. On her good days, she joined Spike both with discreet hunts and with highly visible play at being human. On bad days, Spike did all he could to comfort the sobbing woman.

 

***

 

Buffy also fully enjoying being in the fashion capital of the world and was glad that Spike loved to indulge his Dark Dove with plenty of shopping. The design houses and department stores were a hive of activity as women indulged in all the latest Paris had to offer.

 

“If it wasn’t for the feeding, it would be like taking a way cool vacation.” Somehow she couldn’t see herself being able to say that if she were joined to Angel even with his soul. Spike knew how to enjoy life which was weird for someone who was technically dead. Buffy had long passed being surprised at how very human Spike was most of the time. It was jarring when his need for blood reminded her of his status as a vampire. ‘Maybe that’s why I’m always so disappointed in him. It’s like I know he can do better, be better, be a man.’

 

She thought about all the times she had been disgusted by Spike in the real world. How she always held him to a standard of behavior that was more than what she would expect from even a souled vampire. She judged him by human standards of behavior! “It wasn’t even fair to compare him to Angel because he hasn’t got a soul.”

 

It was a strange thought. Spike, with no soul, was more human and more able to BE human than Angel with his shiny soul had been. Buffy knew she’d have to give that more than a little thought. Somehow she knew that once she fully got what that might mean it would shake her world in a way that there was no coming back from.

 

***

 

Evenings alternated between intellectual and artistic conversations in smart cafe’s or private apartments of eventual luminaries and entertainment in one of the many music halls or nightclubs.

 

Buffy couldn’t wait to tell her mom about actually seeing Maurice Chevalier at the Casino de Paris! 'Mom is going to be so jealous!'

 

There were movies that Buffy had seen on TV with her mom in their ‘cut-up-for-ads’ form that she had now seen on the big screen in opulent art deco theaters. She could almost see her mom drool at the very thought. Buffy missed her mother and hoped that time wasn’t passing at the same rate outside of whatever magic currently had her trapped and bespelled.

 

And as always with Spike, there was the music. They attended ‘high-brow’ concerts with the likes of Ravel and Prokofiev one evening followed by Josephine Baker or the Folies Bergere the next. He seemed to love it all and Buffy enjoyed tagging along.

 

She saw her first Ballet as an invisible date with Spike and discovered she fully enjoyed the talent of Nijinsky and Balanchine and so many others. Spike called ballet ‘poetry of the body’ and she could see that description fit easily. Dru had used that time to indulge in a tryst with a Kregold demon who had a love of sadism and also sported two penises. Buffy knew that Spike knew and her heart broke a bit for him. Being cheated on always hurt.

 

Still, the news from neighboring Germany and Italy filtered into their day to day pleasures adding a sense of foreboding even to those who didn’t have the benefit of future knowledge.

 

Spike fully expected his next Slayer to pop up in easy reach any day. Surely the Powers were aware of the evil brewing and would want their chief warrior on the scene! He fully expected Slayers to be right there in his part of the world just waiting for him to challenge sooner rather than later.

 

He and Dru not only frequented the company of humans but also the demon community with their own pleasures on offer and not only as a ‘dating pool’ for Dru’s darker needs. Knowing the best places for a bit of bloodletting without drawing any attention to their true nature was a helpful resource. So far Dru was not dining on anyone likely to bring out the pitchforks and Spike wanted to keep it that way.

 

He kept his ear to the ground in the demon community for more than that though. He was seeking news of another Slayer. He had caught sight of one in Paris itself but the girl didn’t last but a couple of nights after her calling. He was beginning to wonder if he was going to have to be content with just the one Slayer kill and few fights already under his belt. Maybe if he got in another kill Dru would stop needing others once again.

 

***

 

Buffy tried to put her finger on what was different. Why Spike had no trouble navigating society, conversing with writers and poets and artists with ease. She looked at him and still saw William to her surprise. She remembered how hard social settings had been for the human back in that day. He was as intelligent and funny then as he was now but had been treated as the butt of a joke by most of his peers back then.

 

Watching another evening’s easy conversation in some unknown salon it suddenly occurred to her what had been missing. Confidence! Evidently, the demon had finally given William that last piece he needed. Spike didn’t really care what these people thought about him or his views. If they annoyed him he would end the relationship without a backward glance or moment of self-doubt. The loss would be theirs if he cut them out.

 

The interesting result was that others came to him, courted Spike. They wanted his views on things and gave weight to his opinions. He was a welcomed addition to their company.

 

More and more Spike was out with his friends by himself. Dru liked the humans well enough but was becoming more and more unstable. Spike worried that she would do or say something that would require them to move from their happy home and enjoyable lifestyle.

 

Their friends all saw Dru as lovely but clearly a bit mad. They admired Spike’s devotion to his fragile lover. When she was having one of her bad days they pitied Spike having to deal with someone so volatile and, frankly, more than a bit frightening.

 

Buffy had put two and two together and realized that some of Dru’s visions must be about the coming war and, even more, the holocaust that would make any Hollywood horror film pale in comparison. Dru would get one of those peeks into the abyss and would be torn in two. The part of her that still grieved for her murdered family wanted to flee, to hide. The part that was the demon, forged in the sadism of Angelus wanted to dive in and join the party.

 

Spike didn’t have the benefit of knowing just how bad things were going to get so he couldn’t follow Dru when she demanded he move in two opposite directions at the same time. Dru had begun to take her pleasures elsewhere more and more as her boy reached for the sanity of the world he was enjoying.

 

He’d caught her in bed with others before. Spike had never had Dru’s exclusive attention. He knew that he could never expect the fidelity he wanted to offer to be returned by Dru. She was not capable, made to not be capable. He had a large piece of her heart and that was literally all that she had to give. What sort of man would demand more than all that his love could give?

 

He had come to expect finding Dru in flagrante delicto with some demon or another. Usually her infidelity increased when her personal devils began to ride her the hardest. He couldn’t fault her for seeking comfort where she could. He gave her all he had and it was never enough, not what she needed at least. There were times when she just needed pure demon and Spike had never truly become that. She wanted pain and blood, the rip and tear. Spike’s heart cried for at least a bit of tender. He would always curse Angelus for that!

 

***

 

Dru had been in great spirits over the weekend in the countryside with Pablo and his lover, Marie-Therese Walter. The girl was so very much younger than her beloved. ‘Pablo has the same eye for young girls that Angelus had,’ Spike shook his head. He never understood why these ‘artists’ seemed to look for young flesh when an experienced woman was far more interesting.

 

Boisgeloup was outside Gisors just a couple of hours outside of Paris and an invitation to the country manor and studio was an honor reserved for very few. Pablo had been doing sketches of Dru for a project he had in mind to entitle ‘The Weeping Woman’. Something about Dru’s tortured demeanor had sparked Picasso’s muse and he had done sketch after sketch trying to get just the right look he wanted to commit to canvass and oil in good time.

 

Dru loved posing and adored the rough sketches that showed her image fractured and tortured, a true depiction, the real her.

 

Marie had discovered herself to be pregnant and was arguing with Pablo over his pulling away from her just as she was widening his family. Picasso had quite the wandering eye and Marie's days were numbered.

 

Spike was having his own difficulties with Dru over her insistence that they go to the ‘pit of 'ell itself’, as she called it. Spike had no desire to pick up stakes and move to Germany. The only peace came while Dru posed for Pablo and Spike shared tea and sympathy with the soon to be abandoned Marie.

 

“I just can’t get her to see that it would be a terrible move,” he bit back on a sniffle. He really should have stuck with the tea and not doctored his with alcohol. Nothing like turning into a watering pot like some nancy!

 

“True the news that does get out of Germany is dire,” Marie nodded. “Your being British would not be ideal either.”

 

Spike shrugged, “Could always pretend to be Italian. Still remember enough of the lingo to pass. Dru might remember a few words … on a good day.” He sighed deeply. “Course there are precious few of those lately. Maybe giving in to her and movin’ to Berlin might finally settle her a bit.”

 

“Lots of people are headed to Berlin this coming year, mon ami. The Olympics are going to be elaborate, Herr Hitler is going to want to show up the United States and their 1932 games in California. He will want to show that supremacy he is always nattering about.” Marie-Therese giggled. “Of course that shouldn’t be too difficult. Those games were sad. Half the number of athletes and their own President didn’t even attend once! This terrible depression is not kind to any enjoyment, yes?”

 

“Good reason they call it depression, ducks.”

 

“Oui.” Marie rubbed her belly and stared off into the void for a moment. Spike hoped she wasn’t prone to the sorts of visions Dru got when she did that. “But after the pain can come the pleasure, no?”

 

Spike smiled and thought of his Dark Darling and the ebb and flow of sensation that was their love life. “Got that right.”

 

“We would miss you both, Pablo feels such a kinship with your Drusilla. They share a vision I think.”

 

Spike thought of the current phase of Picasso’s work and shuddered. “I’m afraid so.”

 

***

 

Back in their own apartment near the cafe, La Closerie des Lilas Spike had begun to look for a reliable forger. If he was going to have to indulge Dru’s insistent demands that they move to Germany he needed papers for them both that would pass inspection. That country was changing day-by-day and becoming more and more dangerous for its own people much less for others. There was no way in hell they’d travel there as British citizens! Hitler might claim that the Brits were cousins of the Aryans but there was still a great deal of bad blood between the two nations.

 

“The little fascist seems to get on with the Italians. Think I'm on the right track there. We might pass if you don’t talk much, poodle. Maybe just let ‘em think your my blushin’ British bride if you don’t want to watch what you say too close.”

 

Dru had pouted a bit but was glad that Spike was at last entertaining her desires to jump into the deep end of the pool before the bloodbath began and the pool got too crowded. All he needed now was a push, a reason to speed up the process and leave his friends and interests behind to embrace hers for a bit.

 

***

 

“I’m in the mood for love,” Spike warbled as he climbed the stairs to their flat. “Simply because you’re near me.” He transferred the bouquet of roses to his right hand and smoothed back his hair grinning like a totally besotted fool. Spike hadn’t been lying when he had admitted to Buffy that he was love’s fool.

 

“Funny, but when you’re near me…” he threw open the door with a flourish planning on a night of debauchery and romance with his beloved but stopped cold at the chilling sight before him.

 

“Bloody hell, Dru. What have you done?”

 

There was the corpse of their landlord’s pregnant wife draped over a wooden bench on her back. Dru had found a green drapery that was wrapped loosely around her lower body, her head hung off the edge of the bench nearly touching the ground. Dru had somehow dyed the dead woman's long hair a light shade of blue leaving only small snatches of her own blonde showing through. Her pregnant belly and bare breasts were prominent on display. Spike recognized the scene having seen Pablo’s painting of a similar scene. It had taken Dru’s fancy while they were in the countryside with him.

 

Dru was sitting in the corner covered in the dead woman’s blood pulling her own hair and talking to her pixies. “Must always ‘ave the right model. Daddy says artists ‘ave a responsibility.” Her eyes were unfocused and she rocked back and forth.

 

To Spike’s growing horror he realized that the woman, Adele, still appeared pregnant but the actual fetus was the bloody mess in Dru’s lap. ‘Nothin’ to get the natives on our trail like this,’ he thought in a panic. ‘Have to get rid of the bodies and clean up the mess then get the hell out of here!’ 

 

“Take me to Germany, my Spike,” she moaned.

 

Maybe heading to Berlin was the best idea after all. The best way to hide a monster might be in a place filled with them. He was glad that he had already dropped hints that they were considering a move to get a decent place before the crowds began to flood Germany for the Olympics. He only hoped no one would put two and two together about the timing.

 

Buffy watched as Spike frantically disposed of the poor woman’s body and the bits left of her infant in the Seine. He’d used Dru’s pleasure chains to secure her and knocked her out to prevent her from making any noise that might alert anyone to the situation while he was gone. Spike was grateful that the landlord was prone to late nights drinking wine with his friends. With any luck, they could clean up and be long gone before the man even noticed he was now a widower.

 

Cleaning up was much harder and more time consuming than the body disposal had been but by the time Spike finished it would likely pass muster. They would have to compensate the landlord for the missing bench that had blessedly absorbed a lot of Adele’s blood, Dru had drained her well enough that the majority of the mess was from the unborn babe. Dru’s bloody dress was thrown into the fireplace and Spike watched as it and his days of peace and pleasure in Paris turned to ash.

 

Once Dru regained consciousness she grinned like a cat that had just enjoyed a whole flock of canaries. It seemed that their “feast” was about to move as well, and finally in the direction her demon demanded.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter End Notes:  
> The “Lost Generation” in Paris post WWI https://youtu.be/HPJ2Yqtc1Dk
> 
> Paris 1930’s https://youtu.be/d_YRhLqQKbE
> 
> I’m in the Mood for Love, Paul Whiteman Orchestra https://youtu.be/9excha7QzyY
> 
> Pablo Picasso, The Studio 1934  
> [](https://imgur.com/juYUGLV)  
>  
> 
> Picasso, The Weeping Woman 1937 [](https://imgur.com/2YiIhdL)
> 
> Obviously, Dru is not the actual model but I could see her being a prototype and the subject of early sketches with Picasso's new mistress being the eventual final model for the oil version https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Weeping_Woman
> 
> 1936 Berlin Olympics https://youtu.be/dVlaIJVAUq4
> 
> https://youtu.be/gNKlxcqLKcM


	23. Chapter 23

[](https://imgur.com/RtZIdQP)

Chapter 23

 

 

Having friends with great connections came in handy in bustling Berlin. Dipping into the funds the newly turned William had the foresight to invest allowed Spike to treat his lady to the high life. Dropping the right names opened doors and found “room in the inn” when faced with a city crowded with tourists. The suite in the Adlon had a glorious view of the Brandenburg Gate and enough luxury to even please Darla had she still been with them.

 

In spite of the unease over the new government in many circles, there were still those drawn to the vibe surrounding the old capital. With the Olympics only a month away and the next year being the 700th anniversary of Berlin many of the beautiful people of the day were drawn like moths to the flame. Fascism had won many a convert among the upper classes of Europe and America and the city was near as crowded by the elite as Paris had been. The atmosphere, however, was more somber, guarded. One had to watch what one said and to whom they said it. You never knew what group or individual would be dangerously out of favor from one minute to the next.

 

Spike was attuned to the atmosphere. He could nearly taste the fear and evil. He didn’t have to have Dru’s sight to know there was a bad storm brewing. A short trip to the demon quarter of town put him in touch with the contacts they would need while in Berlin. His reputation assured cooperation and loosened many a tongue or tongue-like appendages in some cases.

 

“So my mate wants to take the spawn and move somewhere a bit more stable for a while. Thinking about France. Hear you just came from there. What do you think?”

 

The pale, sickly, grey skin of the Grindlar demon shimmered with deep olive as his nervous nature came to the fore. He tried to remind himself that this vampire had a reputation of getting along with other demon species provided they didn’t piss him off. He wasn’t such a fool that he would do that, but befriending the newly arrived Master Vampire might be a good move.

 

Spike looked him up and down. “Paris is a treat. Miss it already. Stick to the demon quarters and you and the misses and kiddies should do fine. Flexlar named Qygg could set you up. Tell him Spike recommended him.”

 

The Grindlar smiled widely showing three rows of pointed teeth and revealing breath that would make Satan himself gag. “I’ll do that! Thanks! Anything I can do for you and yours?”

 

“Want to move some funds around. Things not lookin’ too stable at the mo. Know anybody?”

 

“There’s a great international firm. They deal with humans and demons, no prejudice. You go with them and they’ll make sure you don’t take a hit.”

 

“Not wantin’ those wankers running their show from another dimension. Can’t think of their name but they’re only loyal to themselves.”

 

“Wolfram and Hart,” the Grindlar guessed and nodded. “Nah, wouldn’t send a Faryl to them! This group’s on the up and up. The main office is in Switzerland and they’ve been around forever and I mean that literally.”

 

Spike took the information and wrote a note for the helpful demon to give to his old contact, Qygg, in Paris. After that, the ice was broken in the demon community and Spike had a pipeline for all the information he could hope for. He put out the word about his interest in anything Slayer related, got the low-down on the best places for inconspicuous hunting and even the straight dope about the human doings that were affecting everyone including the demon population.

 

Buffy was pretty impressed with Spike’s ability to plan. ‘Funny how his plans never worked in Sunnydale. Maybe it was the Hellmouth that messed them up. Of course, he had to be good at planning though. He’s a lot smarter than we give him credit for being. I guess I should have realized that since he kept not only himself but wacko Dru alive all that time. Nobody could do that just by luck alone!’

 

***

 

Buffy looked around Berlin and remembered a line from some story in English Lit. Maybe Shakespeare or Dickens...somebody old like that. What was important was the line, ‘It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.’ It fit what she was seeing.

 

The German economy was recovering under Hitler but at a terrible social cost! The last real elected President had been Hindenburg who had courted the National Socialists, called the NSDAP then although history would refer to them as Nazi’s later, by appointing their frontman Hitler as Chancellor of Germany in 1933. It didn’t take him long to start molding the nation to his way of thinking and forwarding his own plans. Plans as evil as any demon Buffy had ever fought.

 

That same year they had opened Dachau supposedly to house political prisoners and the Gestapo was formed to help ferret out those “enemies of the state”. The free press wasn’t really free at all any longer since the only publications were those State approved since 1933, the old guard evidently were also enemies of the people. More and more power was assumed by Hitler so that by the time Hindenburg died in 1934 there was none to oppose Adolph Hitler from replacing the offices of Chancellor and President with a single title, Fuhrer.

 

Piece by piece Germany was being transformed for every person living there. The world looked on nervously.

 

The world also showed up in droves for the coming Olympics. No expense was being spared and Berlin shone even if there was a very martial feel to the festivities.

 

****

 

Buffy’s eyes popped as they entered the big blimp thingie that they had been invited to take a rare night ride on. The Hindenburg was the star of the largest class of flying machines, touted as being the way of the future. ‘“Wow! Who knew they used to think the Good-Year blimp was good for more than flying over football games?” She had no idea what the blimp from her time looked like inside but this was something else. ‘There’s a freaking dining room!’ It was fancier than many a hotel even in Buffy’s modern world.

 

“Spike! We’re floating like my fairies. Do you think you'll ‘ear them?” She ran to the window and looked down on the glowing lights in the city below. “See! They’re blinking and glowing. They want to dance with Princess.”

 

“Those are just streetlamps and homes with their lights, Luv.” Spike bit his lower lip to keep himself from laughing. It never went well for him to make light of Dru’s army of invisible friends.

 

Dru pouted but was soon distracted by the announcement that cocktails would be served to the guests. She gave a greedy look at a fellow guests neck, “Could make my own Bloody Mary,” she grinned.

 

“And have us thrown overboard to fall a few hundred feet. Not a good plan Sweetheart.” He put an arm around her waist both in affection and to make certain she didn’t try to make good on her last statement and whispered in her ear. “We’ll catch us a couple of lovelies later and have us a feast, pet. Promise.”

 

Dru loved the zeppelin that towered over the field rising 15 stories high and fueled by hydrogen. The ship had been traveling throughout the world promoting the coming Olympic games and showing off the technology brought to post-war Germany by the new government. The Nazi flag proudly displayed on its side proclaimed the superiority of Hitler’s new Germany.

 

The ride was quiet, not like a plane, and it was smooth too. Buffy had to wonder why there only seemed to be one sorry looking blimp in her own day when this was such a cool way to travel. “Gonna have to ask Willow when I get back,” she decided. “She’ll know.”

 

***

 

“Must that nasty tag-a-long come too?”

 

“Who’s that then, pet?”

 

“Not ‘er time, not ‘er Spike,” Dru pursed her lips and gave Buffy a dirty look.

 

Spike was confused then realized that Dru must feel that invisible watchful eye that had always seemed to be around. “Think that feelin’ just comes with bein’ a vampire, Dru. Felt it since I rose. Used to think it was an angel or some such but think it’s just part of the demon. Don’t feel judged all the time anymore at any rate and don’t think an angel would suddenly be fine with our fun and games.”

 

“No Angel, Make Angel Angelus though,” Dru smiled widely. “Give me back daddy. I suppose she can come.”

 

Spike shook his head. When Dru got bad as she had been since Paris, it was always her daddy she longed for. She’d been cavorting with every disgusting and sadistic demon and human she could find searching for that release that only Angelus seemed to give her. He was growing tired of never being good enough...hell, just not being enough, for his beloved. He’d had more than enough of that before she turned him.

 

“Get prettied up, pet. We’ll go see the handsome young men run their races, maybe give ‘em a reason to run once their event’s finished, yeah?”

 

Dru giggled and went to the ante-room to select something fitting for the biggest event in Europe at the moment.

 

Spike had been more interested in gymnastics and fencing but Dru was dead set on the track and field events. As with most things, Spike deferred to her desires. “Couple of likely Brits competin’. Could stir up a tasty brawl singin’ a bit of “God Save the King” later.” Nothing like riling up sports fans for a bit of fists and fangs. He’d wait until they were out of the actual stadium of course. Spike loved a rousing brawl but wasn’t suicidal after all!

 

They had good seats, once again aided by having made the right friends. Spike had become quite adept at reading people and using that ability to his advantage. In this case, it was to his advantage to get decent seating at various events that pleased his lady.

 

The VIP section had the benefit of plenty of cover not that Spike ever let a bit of sunshine deter him. The refreshments were also a cut above. One thing about the Germans, they did brew some lovely beer!

 

“Pardon,” the blonde man nearly spilled Spike prize earning a low growl from the thirsty vampire.

 

The man’s dark glasses fell off as he twisted to avoid the disaster. Spike started to let loose his specially learned German swear words when he did a double take. He might not be an avid follower of field and track but he did recognize this man or thought he did at any rate. “Aren’t you…”

 

The man looked startled and Spike could smell the fear on him. “Please, I’m nobody, truly.”

 

“Not with your talent. They gonna let you run after all?”

 

The man’s shoulders slumped and he looked around nervously. “Not permitted unless I want to be arrested yet again.”

 

“Bunch of gobshites to ban a sure winner just ‘cause you like the boys,” Spike shook his head. Back in his school days he’d known quite a few gay students and knew their lives were often hell on earth when found out. Germany had begun to be quite open and liberal until Hitler had taken over. Now even former national heroes like the champion runner Otto Peltzer were jailed and banned from their occupations. Made no sense to Spike. Death had opened his eyes to many things but one important one was that love was love. He might like the ladies but what was it to him if someone else liked a sweet lad? Not like Peltzer was going to be buggering someone on the field!

 

Otto’s eyes grew wide and fearful. “Please, sir, don’t draw attention my way. I merely wanted to see them run. Shouldn’t have come.”

 

Spike had been talking quietly knowing better than to draw unwanted ears their way. “Look, I’ll not say a word. You even joined their bloody Fascist party to try to make ‘em happy. Seems the least they could do to let you watch.” Spike looked around and touched the man on his elbow.

 

“Tell you what. Come sit with me and my lady. Put those dark lenses on and noone’ll likely notice. They’re runnin’ for the Gold in a few minutes and I want to see Godfrey Brown make my country proud nabbin’ it.”

 

Peltzer drew up straighter and nodded. “Thank you, sir. I’d love to watch with you but if I were betting my money would be on the American chap. He and the other negro runners are impossible to beat. I believe they are drawing the ire of my Fuhrer with their talent. Archie Williams will likely take the Gold in this meet but the real talent is that Jesse Owens fellow.”

 

Spike grinned. “‘Spect you’re right bein’ an expert and all. Good thing I didn’t put down any dosh on it then. Already lost a few quid on the high jump. Really thought we’d take that one. Dorothy Tyler-Odam is a fine athlete, lovely legs too.”

 

“Oh, yes. The Hungarian was just that much better though. We could have won that one too had they let Gretel Bergmann compete. Don’t see why they forbid her to be on the team. What difference does it make that she’s Jewish when jumping?”

 

“As much as who you take to your bed when you’re runnin’ I suppose. Your Fuhrer has some strange notions.”

 

“He’s not alone. You did hear that the team managers of the women’s team from Poland accused that American sprinter of being a man when she won her 100-meter heat? All nonsense of course. As much a woman as the rest but they made her prove it.”

 

Spike shook his head and laughed, “Take volunteers for the inspection?”

 

Peltzer laughed as well, “I imagine there were plenty of them offering.”

 

Peltzer would have won his bet.

 

***

 

By the end of 1936 Italy under another Fascist, Mussolini, had signed alliances with the new German leader as had Japan. As for Germany itself, membership in the ‘Hitler Youth’ had become compulsory for all boys. The train had left the station and was only picking up speed as it started to careen its way through Europe.

 

Everywhere Buffy looked she saw the build-up of injustice. People who had lived quiet lives just trying to take care of their own families and contribute a bit to society were suddenly forced into the shadows or worse.

 

Moving between the human and demon communities, watching bloodletting by vampires and demons and then seeing the violence directed against humans by humans had left her reeling. Ever since her calling Buffy had a simple dynamic to follow. Human versus demon. Simple. She had never just sought out demons willy-nilly, she had more than enough to do keeping the hostile ones under control. Still, killing a demon was no cause to be upset.

 

Now, though… She had seen kindness and gentleness, basic decency, in some of the many demons she had encountered through her wanderings with Spike. Now she was seeing the darkest of evil in many of the humans strutting about trying to make the world into something horrifying. ‘How is that different from a demon trying to open a Hellmouth?’ she wondered.

 

“Seems like the real battle is between good and evil, not human and demon.” She supposed her job made a bit of sense. There was no police department dealing with the demon world. They were freewheeling, settling disputes with wars and vendettas like the old wild west. The only “law” they had was the Slayer.

 

Maybe that’s what her job really was, to keep the balance by taking out the bad guys who happened to be demons because you couldn’t just call a cop? That made sense but it wasn’t how her job had been described to her. She remembered that well having heard it first from Merrick then again from Giles. "Into every generation, a slayer is born: one girl in all the world, a chosen one. She alone will wield the strength and skill to fight the vampires, demons, and the forces of darkness; to stop the spread of their evil and the swell of their number. She is the Slayer." As a job description, not so helpful.

 

“What IS evil anyway?” Buffy mused. “A vampire feeding? Yeah, that was my go-to answer. Then again it didn’t even have to be feeding...just out of the grave was good enough reason.” Buffy sighed in confusion and frustration. “How is a fifteen-year-old girl supposed to know what’s real evil anyway?”

 

She wished Giles was there so she could ask him about it, demand more than quotes from the Council. “I mean is a lion evil because it chases down a cute antelope and eats it?” Her head hurt, or would if it was there physically in this weird and confusing magic space.

 

“Okay, if the killing itself isn’t what makes it evil then what does?” She really felt out of her depth there. Sure she would protect humans if a vampire or demon was trying to kill them but maybe there was a lot more to consider when you get past the actual ‘caught-in-the-act’ situation. She knew she needed to give this a lot of thought and she really didn’t want to. “If I can’t figure it out easily then,” she looked at Spike with compassion, “how can I expect a vampire with no soul to have a clue?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter End Notes:  
> A/N: I have no idea if the arena for the Field and Track events had a VIP section with shelter but I claim literary license in order to allow Spike and Dru to attend! The Vid seems to show areas with the needed shelter so I hereby christen them as VIP seating!
> 
> 1936 Berlin Olympics
> 
> https://youtu.be/VQAEnPuOCU4
> 
> https://youtu.be/jB0n35UIv-shttps://youtu.be/DX9mc1MC0YY
> 
> https://www.outsports.com/2016/7/27/12294560/gay-olympics-history-otto-peltzer-1928
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Otto_Peltzer
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Helen_Stephens
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Archie_Williams
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gretel_Bergmann
> 
> Life in Berlin 1930 - 1939 in short pathe film https://youtu.be/fHNLXijfiTg (article and part 2 and more here: https://fotostrasse.com/life-in-berlin/#.XHCgMohKjIU )
> 
> Also short https://youtu.be/gxjg07KPB_4 
> 
> Thanks to JustWriter for suggesting a mention of the Hindenberg promoting the 1936 Olympics and Buffy’s reaction. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/LZ_129_Hindenburg https://youtu.be/MinmbjRta3w The Empire State Building’s (built during the Great Depression) spire was thought to have been intended for docking blimps https://youtu.be/5mLnJdYrHng Wind situations prevented it from being used that way though.
> 
> Among the groups targeted by the Nazi’s for elimination in addition to the 6 million Jews were the mentally and physically impaired, Jehovah’s Witnesses, LGBTQ people, Slav’s and other people seen as just so much “trash”. Before Hitler took over Germany had become VERY progressive in the treatment of LGBTQ people (and even a decent place for Jews, one of the reasons so many waited so long to flee… they couldn’t believe their fellow Germans would really go along with the insanity). http://theconversation.com/how-the-nazis-destroyed-the-first-gay-rights-movement-80354
> 
> It was difficult for many in the Gay community to go from being able to be open to suddenly becoming a target. Their uniforms in the camps were noted with a pink triangle (like the Jews with the yellow star). https://news.cnrs.fr/articles/being-gay-or-lesbian-under-nazi-rule Even Trans people were on a fast track to rights and open society until Hitler https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2847643/Berlin-liberal-hotbed-homosexuality-mecca-cross-dressers-transsexuals-male-female-surgery-performed-Nazis-came-power-new-book-reveals.html


	24. Chapter 24

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Photo Legend (this image is for the previous, and next chapter as well as this one):
> 
> The left side represents the “good” part of the times. Films like Bringing Up Baby and Carefree, music from Bing Crosby, Benny Goodman, Deanna Durbin and so on. The center pic is a 1938 radio of the type they would have had to hear music, entertainment, and news from elsewhere in the world.
> 
> The middle collage has scenes from the 1936 Olympics, the Hindenburg in proud flight (and lush interior) and as it exploded in 1937, also Chamberlain (of the UK) signing the Munich agreement that basically promised no one would stop Hitler from taking Czechoslovakia (or “parts” that he wished to lay claim to) in an effort to prevent war. It was seen as appeasement even in its day, also shown, the Nazi troops and planes on their way to invade Poland. Then there are 3 manips of Spike and Dru and their home in Berlin.
> 
> The right side contains representations of the evil of the times. Doubt I need to elaborate on them.

[](https://imgur.com/aWrMVYU)

Chapter 24

 

“Just look at her Dru,” Spike enthused rubbing his hand lovingly on the clunky looking thing on the side table. “She’s a beaut!”

 

Dru looked less than interested as far as Buffy could tell. “Petty as that Ballerina you wouldn’t let me eat?” she sniped. Dru was still angry at Spike over his refusal to let her turn loose during the performance.

 

Ever since Paris Spike had been adamant that they be extra careful with their feeding habits. He tried to get across to Dru the need for circumspection. Dru longed for the days of carnage when the whole world was their all-you-can-eat buffet. She and Spike had argued nearly every day over the issue. “Daddy would be so angry to see us playing at being 'uman this way!”

 

“Well ‘daddy’ isn’t here is he?” Spike sniped back.

 

Spike’s delighted smile faded in the face of Dru’s reaction. “But, sweetling,” he tried to cajole her into a better frame of mind. “We’re the only ones in all of Berlin, probably even Europe, to have one!”

 

Dru rolled her eyes. “It’s a radio, Spike, lots of people ‘ave them.” Dru continued to brush her hair not even looking at Spike’s new treasure or at him either.

 

“Not one like this. This one’s been magicked up. Can pick up signals from everywhere.”

 

“So can any short-wave,” she shrugged, less than impressed.

 

Spike frowned. “Not the same, pet. No static or huntin’ round on the dial tryin’ to pick up somethin’. Goes right to the frequency and it’s as clear as if we right there.” He wiggled his eyebrows playfully. “Can tune in to “The Shadow’,” he coaxed knowing the radio drama was a favorite of Dru’s.

 

The hand holding the hairbrush stilled and she stared into the empty mirror. “That would be nice I suppose.” Finally, a glimmer of interest showed on her face.

 

Spike’s grin returned at the change. “Yeah! Not confined to the daily rantings of the Bohemian Corporal and other gobshites. Had about enough of his precious Wagner too, as if he’s the only Kraut composer. Get some decent programs… Jack Benny, Green Hornet, that new one they just started, The Guiding Light… even some decent jazz again!”

 

Spike took Dru by the hand and led her to the table where the radio sat. “Come on, Poodle, let’s see what the rest of the world is up to, yeah?”

 

***

Dru looked in the mirror again as if there was a reflection staring back. Buffy wouldn’t be surprised to find that the fey vampiress might actually be seeing herself in her own reality.

 

“I don’t like it, Spike. My dark wings are all yellow like unripened fruit. Your dark Plum is all ‘idden.”

 

“What’s that, pet?”

 

Dru fingered her hair. “I don’t like it,” she repeated. The changed appearance had been necessary to ensure no one would recognize her description if they had put two and two together in Paris after her murderous spree that had made flight essential. Her looks were so striking normally that giving her a blonde look had been Spike’s idea. She had hated it from the start.

 

As in most things, however, Spike bowed to her will and the blonde was soon gone and the black returned.

 

Dru held up a few strands and clucked her approval. “Black like my ‘eart now, right and proper.” She smiled at her boy in benediction.

 

***

“The lovely large balloon all to pieces,” Dru lamented as they listened to the radio report of the once proud Hindenburg exploding over the skies of New Jersey. It’s world tour coming to a fiery end.

 

“If I knew it was that flammable I’m never have risked you, beloved,” Spike shivered. He was thankful the airship hadn’t met its fate while they enjoyed their trip. Vampires really shouldn’t flirt with fire in spite of Spike’s habit of not shunning the sun.

 

They settled in for more happy programming by indulging in the melodrama about the Reverend Dr. John Ruthledge and the doings of the other residents of the fictional town of Five Points near Chicago. They liked mocking the pious man's sermons about the insidiousness of racial prejudice, the horrors of war and the injustice of poverty. The new drama form being called a soap opera had captivated them both.

 

“Not that he’s wrong, mind you, just that getting people to make change isn’t goin’ to happen just because of a sweet little sermon.” Spike snorted. He’d lived long enough to know that humans changed little and always with great resistance. There was always some frilly cuffed lout trying to prove they were better than someone else and mankind seemed to love the carnage of war.

 

Current events all around them were proving that easily enough. The world wasn’t at war yet but Spike could feel the ticking of the clock edging to that great midnight.

 

Dru was crooning to one of her dollies having lost interest in the program. Spike had been losing his Dark Goddess more and more to her fits and starts, not to mention other males, both human and demon. The move to Germany hadn’t helped as he had hoped it would. He was beginning to wonder if there was any place on the planet that might give her the peace to help heal her fractures.

 

She had done so well in the States. Spike smiled as he remembered watching her race through the woods chasing her prey, laughing and nearly whole. The pull from her demon to the blood and misery here sang to her, insisted on her joining the party brewing in Europe.

 

He was beginning to think he’d made a dreadful mistake for both of them by allowing her to convince him to bring her there. Even the joys of Paris hadn’t been enough to counter the sirens call of the darkness. Angelus had molded that part of Dru to his own image and likeness just like the god he fancied himself to be.

 

“Maybe George’s coronation next week will perk her up a bit. Have to tune in, hope he goes into a stutter, make my girl giggle.”

 

***

Buffy had come to love the radio programs as much as her vampires did. It was kind of cool having so much have to happen in her head instead of just seeing with her eyes. It was like when her mom used to read her bedtime stories when she was a kid. It gave her the warm fuzzies. She missed her mom.

 

“Huh!” Buffy shook her head in amazement. “My grandma’s alive out there in Illinois!” She did the math in her head, “She was born in 1936 and it’s 37 now so she’d be walking.” She giggled a bit then felt guilty. “Last time I saw Gran she was using a walker and I’ll bet if I saw her now she’d be in one of those kid walker things for toddlers.”

 

She smiled as she watched Spike doing a fair imitation of Fred Astaire foxtrotting Dru across their parlor as they danced to the big band sounds that flooded the apartment. Dru was having a rare good day and Spike was delighted.

 

Dru faltered in her steps and got that look on her face that indicated she was no longer there in the moment with him. “The little bird is lost, my Spike. They’ll look but not find ‘er.” She shook her head as if to clear it then insisted it was time to change the dial to one of her preferred programs. As in most things, Spike immediately complied.

 

“He always does whatever she wants but Dru never even asks him what he wants. She knows how much Spike likes to dance,” Buffy frowned. “It’s nice how he treats her like a queen and all but it really isn’t fair. I think if Dru asked him to stake himself he’d start looking for sharp wood! No wonder he was so destroyed when she dumped him!”

 

She felt a bit guilty about how she had teased the heartbroken vampire and was glad her mom had offered him a bit of comfort last year. “He really didn’t have anybody to care.” Buffy squirmed as she remembered how dismissive she had been of Spike’s grief. She hadn’t believed he had really known what love was yet everything she had seen over all these magicked years had shown just the opposite was true. Spike loved, perhaps, too deeply for his own good. He was too inclined to be selfless. In a way, he lost himself at times trying to be what Dru demanded. Become what she needed.

 

Dru knew it too. She knew just how to play him to get her way. Buffy had watched as Spike joined his sire as she indulged from time to time in mini-massacres that would have made her daddy proud. Buffy already had noted that Spike preferred to hunt his own way. His favorite way to appease his demon was a big brawl with the risk of losing followed by drinking down the best fighter left standing. The other way was to charm a lovely young woman and indulge in a bit of tender play, something Dru avoided, then draining the girl as gently as possible. Those kills were strange to watch because the girls rarely struggled, seemingly in a state of rapture that made no sense to Buffy. Her experience with being bitten had been pain and terror not bliss.

 

The radio program broke into the corny jokes being told by Jack Benny with a news alert. The heroic Amelia Earhart and her navigator had gone missing while over the Pacific on their attempt to traverse the globe. “Guess that was Dru’s little bird,” Buffy thought once more amazed at how easily Dru could pick up on things. It was kind of creepy.

 

***

Spikes wide circle of friends in Paris had not been duplicated in Germany. It didn’t help that Dru was still deteriorating. Her minimal control over the demon within was lessening day by day.

 

Since moving to Berlin, Dru and Spike had reverted to something closer to vampire hours, sleeping in the daytime unless there was a specific reason to be up with the humans.

 

Buffy was pretty sure she, herself, didn’t sleep. Maybe because she had no body to require it. “Going to get a gold medal in Zen-like states when I get back through. Giles will be so proud.”

 

Meditative states or the sleep of the dead, neither could continue with the racket from the apartment house hallway. Pounding on a door woke the sleeping vamps and startled Buffy from her musings.

 

“What the bleedin’ hell’s going’ on?” Spike pulled on his trousers and headed to the door to see what was the cause for the commotion.

 

“Open by order of the Fuhrer. You will comply immediately,” the Gestapo agent insisted. The hallway was blocked by a handful of brown shirts while two SS officers with their death’s head insignia flanked the man pounding on their neighbors' door.

 

‘What lunatic scheme has Bruner been up to,’ Spike wondered. The neighbor had been quiet but friendly enough to stay off of their menu. He’d always opened doors for Dru and doffed his hat politely.

 

Spike had a few conversations with him, enough to know that he was a retired teacher and a bit of a scholar with a soft spot for the masses. A bit too idealistic in Spike’s view. Most humans weren’t really worth going out of your way to help in Spike’s opinion. But the small older man had a heart bigger than his whole body it seemed. He was always taking in stray animals as well as people.

 

“Somethin’ amiss?” Spike asked in faulty German, then followed up with the Italian he’d been using in public since assuming his false nationality.

 

Herr Bruner looked terrified, Spike smelled the fear rolling off of him. It did not please him.

 

“None of your concern,” one of the SS officers sneered.

 

Dru stood behind Spike grasping her housecoat, her raven locks tumbling about her shoulders and her eyes blank.

 

“What’s this?” The officer narrowed his eyes at Dru. “Is your woman a gypsy? She has the look of it,” he accused.

 

“Nine!” Spike knew they had been gathering up many different groups and once detained they were never seen again. Gypsies had been among the first. Seen as thieves, degenerates and “useless eaters” who were a drain on society, few citizens complained of their treatment.

 

“Papers,” the officer demanded with his hand out.

 

“We’re Italian citizens, our nations are allies are we not?” Spike tried to smooth the officers' feathers. He prayed that Dru would remain silent and that she wouldn’t start channeling her damned pixies. He tried to maneuver her back into their apartment slowly and stealthily.

 

“Papers,” he demanded more forcefully.

 

Spike drew his Princess into their small parlor and went quickly to their luggage. Time to see if all the dosh he’d spent on forgeries was worth it or not. If the worst came to the worst they’d end this in fist and fangs but Spike was trying to avoid that sort of attention.

 

While the SS officer was busy with Spike and Dru the Brown Shirt thugs had hustled Herr Bruner out and into the back of an official vehicle.

 

The officer looked disappointed as he gave the papers back to Spike. “These appear to be in order. It would be in your best interests...Italian, to keep to your own business in the future. Our nations may be allies but that does not mean you are.”

 

Once everyone cleared out Spike asked around to get an idea of what had happened to the meek fellow across the hall that he had rather liked. It seemed he had been reported as a communist and was headed to the newly opened Buchenwald camp. “The old guy might have loved Marx a bit but he was no Stalinist!”

 

“Perhaps you should heed the advice of the officer, Mr. Spuntone. Leave German business to the Germans,” a barrel-chested, foul-smelling, neighbor suggested. He, also, gave Dru a speculative look. “You wouldn’t want honest, loyal, citizens to feel the need to give your names to those in authority to investigate… you or your woman. Wouldn’t want anyone to wonder why she plays with those Tarot cards many of us have seen. They might not understand. Best to be silent and enjoy your visit.”

 

Spike realized this man had been the one to turn in the hapless Bruner. ‘Looks like Dru and me will be eatin’ in tonight.’

 

After sharing the smelly neighbor for their meal Spike and Dru had packed their belongings including the treasured radio and made their way into the night headed for the demon side of town. Dru had refused Spike’s suggestion that they leave Germany altogether but at least among the demons they could lay low. He was glad he’d established contacts as soon as they had arrived.

 

***

 

Buffy had been turning the questions over and over in her mind and still didn’t know how anyone was supposed to do what she had been called to do with any ease or true fairness.

 

The demons she was ‘meeting’ there in Berlin were like those in Paris. Most of them merely wanting to get through their day like everyone else. They wanted to feed their families and live in a way that was comfortable. Yeah, there were troublemakers and the “good” demons avoided them just as humans did. Usually, someone would have enough stones eventually and would take out the troublemaker for the good of the community. Nothing like a bad demon running amok to draw unwanted attention after all.

 

At the same time, she was witnessing case after case of humans destroying lives or turning a blind eye to the misery of others.

 

It seemed to Buffy that great evil doesn’t always come with signs of a looming apocalypse and Big Bads aren’t always wearing a name tag or an inhuman face.

 

“Should have realized that last year with the Mayor,” Buffy chided herself. He had looked like the kindly dad in a sitcom and talked like a preacher but had been evil to the core.

 

Sometimes Big Bad’s looked like the mailman or a popular politician and evil itself can creep so slowly you miss the signs as you go along living your ordinary day. As you let it in a small compromise at a time.

 

On the surface, Hitler had brought law and order to the chaos of post-war Germany. He had improved their economy and made their armies strong again. He had gained in popularity because of it. But the true cost was there to see is you only looked… suffering and injustice and more and more missing people. It would only get worse. Buffy knew from her history classes that the end result was as much an apocalypse as any Hellmouth opening by a demon.

 

It left Buffy wondering once again just who was deserving of a staking.

 

***

 

Spike set aside his copy of the delightful book he’d picked up on a rare foray into society. “The Hobbit” was charming and filled with layers. It helped to distract him from the knowledge that his beloved was currently gracing the bed of a Gracknar demon one building over.

 

She would come home with welts all over her beautiful body and an oddly soothed spirit. Spike wished he was more willing to give her the pain she required when she got like this. He tried but it always took such a toll on his heart that he resisted her requests until she sought her pleasures elsewhere.

 

The other demons in the community knew what was going on but none dared taunt the cuckolded vampire. Most felt sorry for him and more than a few females made overtures to Spike to try to ease his pain with some pleasures for himself. He never took them up on it. Dru might have been incapable of fidelity but Spike was fully capable and usually held to it. Instead, he read his books, wrote in his journal (and boy-howdy did Buffy wish she could get a really good look at what he was writing!), and he listened to his beloved radio.

 

Their arguments were more frequent too. Spike would lash out in hurt and Dru would tear into him, sometimes literally. Other times Dru would make impossible demands or insist on unleashing her demon in a children’s ward of a hospital or the like and Spike would be the one to have to literally restrain her.

 

Putting her in chains always made her want more than Spike was willing to give. She would whine that he wasn’t demon enough, that he hadn’t learned enough from daddy. That usually got her the bloodletting she craved. Dru would smile as Spike wept.

 

“Hey, Spike!,” his Ano-movic poker buddy popped his head in the doorway interrupting Spike’s journey with Bilbo Baggins. “You’re an order of Aurelius vampire aren’t you?”

 

“Me and Dru, yeah.”

 

“Thought you might want to know the news making its way through the demon community being one and all.”

 

“Is one of the motley crew here? Not really one for family reunions,” Spike rolled his eyes. Just his luck to have one of the line there to bugger things up further.

 

“Not that I know of. Just heard about the big guy and the mess he got himself into way out in California someplace.”

 

Spike put down the book. “You mean Nest? Old Heinrich in a pickle then?” He grinned widely. He hadn’t liked the self-styled “Master” at all when he had been presented to him early in his career as a vampire. “Arrogant fuck deserves anything he gets if you ask me.”

 

“Heard he was trying to open up a big Hellmouth there, let out the Old Ones.”

 

Spike looked shocked. “What kind of idiot is he? The Old Ones start poppin’ out and what does he think they’ll do? He can kiss his whole “Master” crap good-bye that’s what. Old Ones will look at him, see him as a half-breed and take him apart before they start on the rest of the world.” He shook his head and really hoped the mess his friend had mentioned had stopped the old bugger before he could start the end of the world.

 

“I happen to like the world the way it is, well, maybe not the way it is here in Kraut-land maybe but the way it can be. Like dancin’ and music, art,” he picked up the novel, “books. Interestin’ people that keep you from bein’ bored out of your head livin’ forever and all. No sane demon wants to create hell on earth! Besides, just who does the old bat think he’s gonna eat if the Old Ones wipe out all the humans?”

 

Buffy laughed as she remembered Spike saying almost the same thing to her when Angelus was trying to bring hell on earth with Acathla. He clearly had meant what he’d said when he suggested their truce.

 

“Relax, and pull back the fangs, brother! An earthquake messed up his plans. Word has it he’s stuck like a cork in a bottle. Got a way into the ritual just as the quake hit. Now there’s this mystical barrier trapping him underground at the opening to the Hellmouth. Got his minions bringing him people to feed on but he can’t finish the ritual and can’t leave either.”

 

“Good.” Spike sighed in relief. His head tilted as he thought about the ramifications of this news. Surely Dru would want to rush to her great-grandsire’s side. Maybe he’d finally get her to leave this human hell-hole to go to the demon variety. He had a feeling it would be safer in the long run. “Any word about his best girl, name of Darla?”

 

The demon shook his head. “Not sure but I don’t think anyone else is actually trapped. If this Darla was there she might be one of the ones bringing in the take-out”

 

“Yeah, she’d do that. Loves her sire almost as much as she loves her child.”

 

Spike could hardly wait for Dru to come home so he could tell her the news. Finally, she’d have to agree to leave Hitler’s cesspool of human misery before they found themselves among those being rounded up. God only knew what they might do with demons if they recognized what they were!

 

Dru was upset about Nest. Glad Darla was there to help and announced she was in no way interested in heading to California. Spike retreated to the Shire and a world where a plucky Hobbit could be able to just do what needed doing without having some crazy bint diggin’ in her heels!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter End Notes:  
> Spike’s false surname, Spuntone, means Spike in Italian (or so Google tells me).
> 
> https://youtu.be/7unHEeJkKww I imagine you all know Amelia Earhart but you can get some visuals here of the last footage of her before the flight.
> 
> Jack Benny Jello radio show 1937 https://youtu.be/GjdKOo2vLQw
> 
> I am taking liberties regarding what programs might have been available on the radio for Spike and Dru to enjoy. Shortwave picked up signals from far away even if they sometimes had some static to filter out (I loved my shortwave radio back in the 1960s). I am going to pretend that at least some of the more popular broadcasts would have made it to them there in Berlin. Radio entertainment they might have enjoyed included programs such as The Shadow https://youtu.be/iIfNXBTG7cw 
> 
>  
> 
> https://youtu.be/Zb3IlLYbiBw The Guiding Light, a pioneer “Soap Opera” began on radio in 1937, debuted on TV in 1952 and was the longest running continuing drama in history until it was canceled in 2009 after 72 years! It is the fifth-longest running program (in general) in all of broadcast history;
> 
> A very brief history of radio https://youtu.be/ESYjfDJzMY8
> 
> Germany as Hitler rises in newsreel images https://youtu.be/3tXZLwtthRc
> 
> Berlin in the 1930’s https://allthatsinteresting.com/berlin-in-the-1930s
> 
> Targets of the Nazi’s were not just based on race alone but other groups as well were seen as not being worthy of life https://encyclopedia.ushmm.org/content/en/article/mosaic-of-victims-in-depth
> 
> https://encyclopedia.ushmm.org/content/en/article/genocide-of-european-roma-gypsies-1939-1945
> 
> https://encyclopedia.ushmm.org/content/en/article/political-prisoners


	25. Chapter 25

[](https://imgur.com/TKcWP9a)

Chapter 25

 

“Hey, Spike,” the blue-tinged demon greeted Spike jovially. “Going to the cinema with your Princess tonight? Grack has a sneak preview of that screwball comedy the humans won’t get to see for another few weeks. That Cary Grant cracks me up. Just the thing to fight off all this Sieg heil craziness.”

 

Spike snorted, “Yeah. Gettin’ more than a bit tired of all the hapless little robots and their blind followin’ an obvious nutter. That the flicker with the leopard Grack showed the trailer for last week?” Spike smiled at the memory of Dru declaring that he was her baby leopard and then proceeded to do her best to ‘tame’ him for hours. Good times!

 

“That’s the one! Should I have him hold a couple of tickets for you at the box?”

 

“You do that.”

 

Life in the demon quarter had fewer luxuries than Spike and his lady had become used to but it made up for it in the freedom offered them to not be hiding what or who they were. The demons were also resourceful enough to get hold of some of the better entertainments and the black market flourished.

 

The only demons left in Berlin were those most able to pass for human, all except those with darker skin that is, they had the good sense to get out of town. Most that might draw notice had long since fled the capital for safe havens elsewhere. Some, like Spike’s movie-buff friend, tried to remain but never ventured outside their own neighborhood. Cabin fever and demons … not a good mix.

 

Spike and Dru cautiously ventured out of the area from time to time to enjoy the nightlife and to selectively hunt.

 

As in most cities, the demon community had established itself closer to the poorer areas of human habitats. Spike never liked to hunt close to their lodgings and at this point, it appealed to some deep, hidden, part of Spike that their choice of prey had spared those who were already suffering quite enough from the human monsters.

 

Spike had taken to attending rallies of Brown Shirts and Hitler Youth picking from among the true believers and thinning the herd a bit. Every time he dropped a body he thought of the smirking SS officer who had threatened his beloved and smirked in private triumph.

 

He was headed for the massive Nathan Israel department store on Spandauer Street to collect the Deanna Durbin doll that Dru had been coveting since seeing an advertisement for it in an issue of Photoplay. She loved her dollies and love the gossip articles that featured all the pretty people in film.

 

‘Dru would have loved bein’ a Hollywood starlet with all her love of melodrama and glamour.’ He shook his head and let go of thoughts about what their lives might have been had they never encountered Angelus. ‘Even a vampire could live nice and decent if they were careful. Have to use your noggin’s all.’ Not with Dru’s fluctuating mental condition, however. She would always be confined to the dark corners and edges of the bigger world. Demon society was fine but Spike preferred the freedom to have a foot in both worlds. It was far too confining and he was ever the rebel.

 

It was easy to see that the human world was starting to constrict every bit as much as the demon world had always done but for different reasons. ‘’Maybe not so different in a way. Idiot Nazi’s lookin’ at gettin’ rid of everyone that doesn’t look a certain way or is from someplace different. Whip up the crowd, make ‘em fear anyone not like them until they all follow like sheep and let ‘em round ‘em up or drive ‘em away.’

 

Just that past March they’d marched their army into Austria and spread the sickness there. ‘Adolph greeted like a conquering hero. Fools didn’t even seem to realize they were handin’ their country over to the ravin’ loon. Too bad he didn’t just decide to stay there and not come back to Germany. Gettin’ harder to keep out of view.’

 

Yeah, some mindless comedy was just what he needed! He’d drop by the underground theater and pick up their tickets on his way home with Dru’s new doll.

 

***

 

A few months later they were just exiting the demon theater yet again when Spike’s life perked up at last. He’d been in a decent mood following the screening of ‘The Adventures of Robin Hood’. Dru loved Errol Flynn and Olivia de Haviland was a bit of alright as well. He’d playfully teased Dru about her hero wearing tights and looking like a bloody ponce until she’d flounced off in a huff.

 

Spike hadn’t noticed a half-Brachen approach him, his eyes were all on Dru flirting outrageously with a particularly ugly Lurite and silently dreading having to fumigate their apartment from the reek of the bastard once Dru had her fun with him. Might take a day before Spike could work up the desire to return home. He didn’t have to have Dru’s second sight to know how her flirting was going to end.

 

“Spike! Hear you’re interested in news about Slayers,” the Brachen whispered.

 

“Could be.” He narrowed his eyes and gave the demon his full attention. No point in worrying over yet another betrayal by Dru after all and he was talking about a Slayer no less.

 

“Heard through the grapevine that the Chosen One is here in Berlin, or will be. Not sure of her name but rumor has it she’s just moved here with her Watcher. Grack said you’re paying for good info.”

 

“You bring me good info, you get paid. Not until then. So far all you’ve got is that there’s a rumor. Always rumors about Slayers in demon towns. You got anything solid maybe I pay.”

 

The Brachen looked around carefully unwilling to lose his possible source for quick cash. “I’ll have some soon. Should I drop by your place?”

 

Spike looked over at Dru as she led her latest conquest towards their home. “Naw. I’ll be bunkin’ with Grack for a day or two. Meet me there. But only when you have somethin’ I can really use.”

 

“Good as done,” he smiled and slipped away through the milling group.

 

***

 

Once more Buffy watched as Spike stalked his prey. The Brachen was as good as his word and he’d come up with a name and address quickly.

 

The girl was actually pretty good. Her skills with a knife were better than those with the stake but she was quick and sure-footed and clearly determined. After only a week of watching, Spike had decided she was worthy of a dance.

 

“Have to be quicker than that little girl,” Spike taunted as he and Ursula Muller whirled around one another, neither landing easy blows. Both giving as good as they got.

 

Buffy watched Spike getting ever closer to a Slayer kill yet knew he wouldn’t succeed. She knew he would get his next victory a long time from now. She wondered why Spike was going to let this one go. ‘It can’t be that Ursula will actually win ‘cause Spike’s still around to annoy everyone,’ she reasoned.

 

They had been fighting all out for at least an hour and Spike was having the time of his life. He hadn’t been able to fight full-out in quite a while because he knew better than to draw the attention of the ever-watchful Nazi authorities by starting a large brawl.

 

The girl was a thing of beauty! Not as graceful as the Chinese bint had been but she had the raw animal instincts of a seasoned killer.

 

They were moving lightening fast and Buffy couldn’t take her eyes off of them!

 

She nearly jumped out of her skin (if she had skin, that is) when she heard a voice coming from directly behind her ghostly self. “Vampir! Sie mussen einen dieser Vampir einfangen. Wir konnen ihre Macht fur den Krieg einsetzen.” Buffy had no clue what any of that meant except the vampire part. Whatever it was it wouldn’t be good for Spike. She felt a chill as she watched the Brown Shirts descend to the battleground.

 

Spike’s dance was interrupted by the group of men in SA uniforms headed towards them with determined looks on their faces. Suddenly the Slayer was the least of Spike’s trouble as he dodged clubs and fists noticing that the girl was also under attack. Without a word, the two who had just been fighting one another found themselves back to back trying to hold off the thugs and not be bludgeoned or shot.

 

The girl fell first and as the troopers did their best to restrain her, Spike squirmed from under a fallen SA man and ducked into the bushes with vampiric speed.

 

The man behind Buffy shouted his orders, “Verteilen, wo es einen gibt, wird es mehr geben!”

 

As Buffy and Spike looked on, the thrashing girl was clubbed on the head into unconsciousness and bundled off to who knows where.

 

“Fuckin bastards!” Spike was furious. He’d lost his Slayer and they clearly had recognized what he was as well. He kicked at a tree stump in fury then dove into the entrance to the tunnels to get back to his own district. “Idiots must think she’s a vampire too since she was able to fight me. Damn, damn, damn.”

 

Buffy wondered what the Slayer’s fate would be in the hands of the military. She shuddered and remembered that in her own time another military had been experimenting on demons. The whole reason Spike was staying there with Giles was because they had tinkered with his head. She didn’t like to think that the USA would be following in the footsteps of Nazi Germany but it looked possible. ‘What would the Initiative do to me if they got me like Ursula? Would they think I’m a demon too?’ For the first time, Buffy really understood the underlying evil of the actions of the group working in her own time.

 

Spike almost hoped the bloody Lurite was still shacked up with Dru. He really wanted to tear something’s head off their body!

 

***

Dru’s smelly demon lover was gone and she had even opened a window to clear the air a bit before going to bed to rest.

 

Spike gazed at his beloved looking almost angelic in the pale moonlight that filtered in gently.

He closed the drapes and sighed deeply. “Buggering country’s been nothin’ but one disaster after another,” he whispered as he ran a hand through his hair loosening his curls in the process.

 

He pulled the blanket up on Dru then went to the parlor carefully closing the bedroom door so as to not disturb his sleeping love. From the looks of her, she was sated and not by him. This was not how he had envisioned his eternity!

 

Spike sank down in the armchair and opened his flask drinking deeply. He stared at the bedroom door and began to tap his finger on his thigh to the beat of a song that came to mind. Softly he sang the words that had so spoken to him.

 

“Out of the darkness, you suddenly appeared

You smiled and I was taken by surprise

I guess I should have seen right through you

But the moon got in my eyes.”

 

He snorted in self-derision. The taste of the whiskey bitter in his mouth as he thought of Dru cavorting with others starting with Angelus all the way up to this latest interloper.

 

“I thought a kingdom was in sight

That I would have the right to claim

But with the morning’s early light

I didn’t have a dream to my name.

 

You know the saying that all who love are blind;

It seems that ancient adage still applies.

I guess I should have seen right through you,

But the moon got in my eyes”

 

He sobbed and took another gulp of the alcohol that was all that would be warming him this night. No Slayers blood won in the victory of a fair fight and no Princess for Spike.

 

***

“I want to make a dolly dance,” Dru pouted.

 

Their lives had gone back to their pre-Slayer-encounter routine. Spike now had a room above the theater for those nights when Dru was ‘otherwise occupied’ and relished the days when she was all his again. This was one of those nights.

 

They had just come from a screening of “Carefree” and Dru was in raptures over Fred Astaire and was insisting that the dancer was actually a vampire with a very strong thrall.

 

“You make this dolly dance, luv” Spike swept her up into his arms and did his best imitation of the moves they’d just seen in the film.

 

Dru giggled as he spun her around. “Not like that, silly boy.”

 

Her laughter peeled warming Spike’s heart. She was so seldom in a good mood of late and almost never playful. Perhaps more assistance from Hollywood would help do the trick.

 

He’d obviously been neglecting his lady. If a spot of torture was what she needed then he had to suck it up and give her what she craved and stop sniveling. No wonder her eyes roved! ‘Needs more monster in her man,’ he decided.

 

“I want to use the same thrall Fred used on ‘is dolly,” she continued. “I think I could do it.”

 

They entered the apartment laughing in each other’s arms.

 

“He doesn’t have a thrall, dove. It’s just clever choreography.” he saw her delighted smile fade and wished he would have bitten his own tongue rather than correct her musings. He scrambled to rescue the night, “But then, powerful thrall like yours could likely work too!”

 

Her smile returned but with a bit less childlike glee and more calculated cunning. “Let’s find a pretty dolly, my Spike.”

 

Spike’s shoulders sagged. Looked like the evening was going to be about hunting and bloodplay and not the romance he had in mind.

 

“Find ‘er and make ‘er whirl and twirl and bleed,” Dru had begun to do a dance of her own.

 

Yeah, he’d need to start to give her what she wanted or he might just lose her and then who would he be?

 

***

Spike tapped out the rhythm of the song blaring out of the radio. Benny Goodman had Lionel Hampton and Gene Krupa sitting in and the jazz tempo filled Spike with energy. It was still daylight though and they were stuck inside.

 

Dru played having tea with her favorite dolls, Miss Edith notably absent. That doll had been facing the wall in the corner for most of their time in the apartment. Spike knew that part of Dru did regret the hurt she caused him with her infidelities and assumed that was why her poor porcelain avatar was in the dog-house.

 

He put down the newspaper and watched as she poured invisible tea into her precious china cups. “Says here that idiot Chamberlain signed that agreement with Adolph. Don’t need to be a genius to know how that’ll play out.”

 

Dru looked into the distance, eyes unfocused. “Snap, snap, snap,” she clicked her teeth. “Only one cake allowed but naughty children eat the whole tray.”

 

“Just what I was sayin’,” Spike agreed. “If they think Hitler will be happy with just the part he’s callin’ Sudeten German territory they’re crazier than he is.”

 

Dru sipped at her imaginary beverage. “Not nice to eat everyone’s cake. Naughty children should be punished.”

 

“Right you are, pet.” He stood and stretched. “They don’t hide their ideas so it’s not like Old Blighty hasn’t heard what he’s been spoutin’ all this time.” He shook his head and chuckled. “What are they teachin’ nowadays? They carry on about ‘Aryan’ purity and go all barmy over anyone not blond, blue-eyed and tall.” He laughed. “The bloody real Aryans were from India! Not a blonde in the bunch. Do they think they’re less pure in the summer when they tan?”

 

Dru began to croon off-key something about snow white and blood red.

 

Spike rose to answer a knock at their door hoping it wasn’t another pesky neighbor complaining about his loud music. ‘Just don’t appreciate the greats! Damned if I’ll turn down the radio.’ He felt a start of guilt when he realized one reason he liked it up loud was that the music drowned out the discordant sounds of Dru and her songs of gore and … what was that last bit? Maggots? Yeah, better the radio than that.

 

It was the Brachen. “Hey, Spike. Sorry it didn’t work out with that Slayer but I hear there’s a new one popped up in Nuremberg. Word has it she’s one of them, you know those kids who go to all the rallies and all. Funny how the Powers pick someone who’s okay with the evil the humans are up to and have them just kill us. We aren’t even a big threat right now!” The Bracken said indignantly. “Doesn’t seem fair.”

 

Spike mentally calculated… Nuremberg was over 400 kilometers away. Spike knew that Dru wouldn’t be willing to go that far just on the off-chance the Slayer would still be alive when they got there. Still, it wouldn’t hurt to get whatever info the pin-cushion might have. “Any hard intel?”

 

“Her name’s Anni Sonnen… something. She’s in the Hitlerjugend. Pretty young, only 14.”

 

Spike doubted she’d last long. She couldn’t have had too much training. Maybe it wouldn’t be worth his effort anyway he consoled himself.

 

“Anyone find out what happened to the feisty bundle I nearly had?”

 

“She never turned up after that night. Lots of demons figured you took her out and I didn’t tell them otherwise. Figured it just added to your reputation.”

 

“Not takin’ credit for anythin’ but fair, clean, kills mate.” Spike frowned. He loved to brag but only about things he actually did.

 

The Brachen looked a bit abashed. Honest vampires were rare and he always forgot that Spike was nothing if not honest. “I did hear a rumor that the bunch of SA guys that grabbed her took her to a lab somewhere. Must’ve thought she was one of us.”

 

Spike felt sick. No Slayer deserved to die that way. They were meant to die in battle like the Valkyries they were. “I hate these bastards. Blur everything up not to mention ruinin’ all my fun. I had her. Could’ve had my second.”

 

***

The radio news was broadcasting yet again about the young Polish refugee living in Paris who had shot German diplomat Ernst vom Rath. The kid was Jewish and the broadcasts were stirring up the hatred towards all Jews because of his actions.

 

“Blamin’ a whole group when one person goes off half-cocked,” Spike shook his head. “Nothin’ like givin’ ‘em fire for their propaganda machine.”

 

Herschel Grynszpan had made no attempt to resist or escape. He easily confessed to the French police and said that his motive for the shooting was to avenge the persecuted Jews. The Nazi press and political leaders were whipping up fury everywhere in Germany.

 

Spike had nearly been caught up in the rioting that had turned into group madness like a fire with added gasoline. He’d been picking up a few things from the department store when gangs led by SA thugs began to ransack and burn everything Jewish owned.

 

“Did get lots of loot in the mayhem,” he grinned and looked at the stash of stolen goods he’d taken during the melee. He had nothing against Nathan Israel, they’d been decent enough to him as a customer. Nothing against Jews either but there was no way a self-respecting vampire would pass up a chance to join in a bit of smash and grab. “Vampire here. What?” He looked towards the invisible watcher that he largely ignored for the last few years when he sensed that old feeling of being judged and found to be in want once again. “Only ate some of the marauding Krauts and nicked some pretties for Dru. What do you expect?”

 

Buffy just shook her head. She knew that he was capable of better. Still, he was right. He was a vampire and humans were doing far more evil than he and Dru had been doing for a long time now.

 

Buffy had been in a bit of a funk from the time she heard the rumor that the current Slayer was actually part of this madness! The girl was siding with the obvious evil of the Nazi regime. Wasn’t a Slayer called to fight for the side of good? How could she be part of all of this? How could the Council let their Slayer be part of it?

 

Why didn’t her Watcher encourage her to join the resistance? Why didn’t the Council work against the Nazi’s if they were the group designated to fight against evil? Why did they turn a blind eye to THIS evil while still hunting down every demon that crossed their path?

 

She’d been giving it a lot of thought as she watched the world burn. Maybe a Slayer needed to do more than Slay demons willy-nilly. Maybe the Council needed to actually do something beyond paying themselves lots of money and lording it over the girls they sent out to kill and die.

 

She was still struggling with the whole good and evil thing. But she had a germ of an idea that maybe they should work out rules and laws for demons and then have the Slayer enforce them. It seemed like that was more what the Powers originally wanted. Let the humans use their laws and courts and the Council and Slayer could police the demon species?

 

“It needs to be about evil not just about being a demon,” she concluded. She’d seen enough to know without a doubt that not all demons were evil. She’d also noticed there were those who could choose to not do evil.

 

She’d noticed the differences. Angelus and Darla WERE evil and dangerous by choice. They chose to be that way. They reveled in evil for evil’s sake.

 

Spike could be dangerous and he did do evil things but he could also be almost human. She had seen him make THAT choice fairly often once he was away from Angelus.

 

It seemed that some demons had evil intent and some didn’t. They were like humans that way. Maybe her job wasn't about vampires and demons but just protecting human life when the threat was a vampire or demon who couldn’t just be arrested or jailed.

 

The Slayer would have to judge by what they were doing not just what they were. That thought made her nervous. ‘Could get killed easy if I wait to see if a vampire or demon is a threat that needs to be taken down. Stupid Powers picking young girls to have to make that kind of decision!’

 

She was still frustrated and missed her mom and Giles more than ever. She needed to work this out and knew that between the two of them they could help her figure out just what she was really Chosen to do.

 

Buffy thought of Spike in her time. Even the choice to do evil had been taken from him with that chip. She knew they had done the right thing in not dusting him. She’d seen that he made good choices lots of times anyway and now in her time even how he ate was out of “evil action” territory. Maybe one day he’d even decide not to kill to eat by his own choosing. She knew he had it in him.

 

Suddenly she was glad that Spike had the chip so she didn’t have to even consider staking him until she could work all of this out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter End Notes:  
> A/N Slayer Ursula Muller is my creation. Slayer Anni Sonnenblume is from the comics written and illustrated by Rebecca Sinclair and Mira Friedmann
> 
>  
> 
> (Blame Google translator for any errors) “Vampir! Sie müssen einen dieser Vampire einfangen. Wir können ihre Macht für den Krieg einsetzen.”translates to: “Vampire! You must capture one of these vampires. We can harness their power for the war to come.” And: “Verteilen,
> 
> wo es einen gibt, wird es mehr gebe” translates to “Spread out, where there is one there will be more”.
> 
>  
> 
> Film trailers: https://youtu.be/F25nzu6hh0Q (clip) https://youtu.be/nuTlRV13NeI (including the clip with Fred's "thrall")
> 
>  
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nathan_Israel_Department_Store 
> 
>  
> 
> Bing Crosby 'The Moon Got In My Eyes' https://youtu.be/FHvO8KSpokc
> 
> Benny Goodman Quartet https://youtu.be/zBs9gZQX7lQ
> 
> Deanna Durbin was a star on radio and in film https://youtu.be/Z8uN30PYkS0 and even had tons of dolls in her image that can still be found (like Shirley Temple dolls) http://www.deannadurbindevotees.com/t386-deanna-durbin-dolls
> 
>  
> 
> The murder in Paris was used by the Nazis as a pretext to launch Kristallnacht, the antisemitic pogrom of November 9 and 10, 1938 Herschel Grynszpan was last rumored to be alive in 1945, he was age 23 when he disappeared. He was a Polish-Jewish refugee, born in Germany. Grynszpan was seized by the Gestapo after the Fall of France and brought to Germany. His eventual fate remains unknown. It is generally assumed that he did not survive WWII, and he was officially declared dead in 1960. The Germans made the Jewish shop and homeowners pay for the destruction of their homes and businesses by enacting a 1 billion Reichsmark “atonement tax”.
> 
> https://www.history.com/topics/holocaust/kristallnacht


	26. Chapter 26

[](https://imgur.com/WMT6bHD)

Chapter 26

 

Spike watched the black beauty as it was being unloaded from the freight car. “Easy! My brother paid good money to send that to me. There’d better not be a scratch on it when you’re done!” The imperious young man brow-beat the stevedores as they gently maneuvered the sleek Lincoln roadster off the train. “I realize your understanding is limited but that vehicle is expensive. One mark on her and I’ll see that you are demoted to loading coal instead of unloading valuable merchandise.”

 

Spike had been watching the process for close to a half hour. If the arrogant idiot had stayed out of their way the railroad crew would have had the car out and on the road long since. This was one of those micro-manager types who felt they, and their concerns, were just a cut above everyone else. Spike recognized the type. In his human life, he had seen a plague of them.

 

It had been a profitable night for Spike already. He had relieved a high-end haberdasher of his finest stock as well as the man’s weekly profits all in one go. Dru would be proud to be out in society in his company spiffed up as he was. Maybe getting out among the humans more would turn the trick and bring his Dark Darling back to his arms again. Living among the demons had kept them safe from the Gestapo but it had also further fueled the demon currently in the driver's seat with his sire. And speaking of drivers seats… that Lincoln would be a great addition to their image as they re-entered the world of Berlin society.

 

He moved into the streetlight, one shadow separating from the rest with practiced ease. “You sound like a Yank.” Spike lit a cigarette and quirked an eyebrow. “Long way from home aren’t you?”

 

He knew this young man’s type well. Knew how to appeal to the vanity and exploit insecurities. The fellow was broadcasting his inner self as loudly as one of Spike’s beloved radio programs. Appeal to the ego, flatter him by making him think someone of note was taking notice of him. Easy really. Spike could practically feel the purr of the engine of the roadster already.

 

The young man looked Spike up and down assessing his value. The tailor-made suit of finest wool, silk tie, and pocket hanky bespoke wealth and breeding as did the cultured British accent that Buffy hadn’t heard Spike use in years! Spike played with the gold, engraved cigarette case in his left hand drawing attention to the signet ring on his pinkie. His entire appearance and demeanor screamed someone of importance… just what this man craved.

 

The man quickly judged Spike worthy of note and offered a smile. “Ya’ got me. Live here in Berlin now but I’m a Chicago boy by birth. Came over for the ‘36 Olympics, liked what I saw happening, made some connections and stayed.” 

 

The fellow was chatty and seemed to be looking to make a friend. ‘No doubt not on too many dance cards with his offputting ostentation. Gonna be doin’ a public service to Berlin society really.’ Spike gave the fellow one of those superior looks that his kind loved to see in their peer group but remained silent. Make the lad do the cultivating.

 

“You British?”

 

Spike nodded. “Once upon a time. Think of myself as a citizen of the world for the most part. Traveled a fair bit.” He took out and looked at a beautifully crafted pocket watch to underscore that his time was far too valuable to waste on just anybody. “Like you, I came for the games, stayed for the…” he looked about, “ambiance and opportunities.”

 

“You sound Oxford, am I right?” At Spike’s nod, the man continued, obviously seeking to impress. “Yale here. Thought about study overseas but gran-pater wanted me closer to home. He didn’t hold with European morals. He’d be happy to see the land of his ancestors getting cleaned up, rid of the dross that sullies most of the continent.”

 

Spike stopped himself from laughing at the pompous asshole. Boy obviously bought into that whole superiority complex that had infected too many idiot humans of late. In the end, they all tasted the same and all died alike.

 

The man seemed to think he’d found a kindred spirit and had determined that Spike was worthy of cultivating.

 

“Told my brother I was looking into automobiles and next thing I know he’s shipping this to me,” he laughed. “‘38 Lincoln. Nice ride but I’m afraid Fritz misunderstood. I was talking about getting in on the ground floor of that Volkswagen company that the Fuhrer helped Porsche design. Lots of money to be made I’m thinking, not that I’m in need but never too much, am I right?”

 

Spike had already decided this fella was asking to be lunch but figured he’d take his time, do it like a true European and linger a bit. See just how full of himself this pup was. Make a good story for Dru later.

 

“There is money and breeding and one cannot put too high a value on either,” he seemed to agree with the young American.

 

“Say! While they’re offloading my present, perhaps you’d care to join me for an early dinner. It’s a rare day I chance an encounter with someone who knows what’s what.”

 

“I was just thinking of dinner actually,” Spike grinned. The man seemed to be one of those Americans who heard an educated British accent, decent manners, costly clothing and added it all up coming to the conclusion they were in the company of someone of the nobility. ‘Nothin’ they like better than to point to their friend and introduce him or her as Lord or Lady so-and-so as if they don’t breathe the same air as the rest of the pulsers.’ It had always been that way it seemed.

 

“There’s a fairly decent cafe up the road if you’d be inclined. Not as elegant as you’re likely accustomed but they have a decent chef.” The man pointed up the road towards a small bistro. “Say! I never even introduced myself. What you must think of my manners!”

 

Spike gave him what he wanted and looked down his nose a bit as if to show that he had never expected good manners from the likes of an American. “I rather chalked it up to your being from the colonies. That is the land of equality is it not? One learns not to expect the same standards one learns in more… established… nations.”

 

Oh, yeah, the guy was eating it up. He laughed a bit and even blushed slightly. “True. We Americans can be vulgar. That’s one reason I fit better over here in the Fatherland.” He cleared his throat and offered his hand, “I’m Heinrich Luetgert.”

 

“Neville Ormsby-Jones,” Spike lied with ease. Americans did love hyphenated names. “You needn’t stand on formalities so you may skip the Sir, it is merely an honorific after all.” What the hell, give the fellow a bit of joy before it all ended.

 

The young man was clearly impressed with his new connection. “Why, thank you … Neville. I can call you Neville, can’t I?”

 

“My intimates have called me several things but Neville will do.” Spike was feeding the sycophant perfectly. He’d seen what Heinrich was yearning for and gave it to him. “No point in adding a title and the like, just give him the attitude he’s wanting and he was all but drooling.

 

“Luetgert, you say?” Spike frowned as if trying to retrieve an old memory. “Knew of a chap by that name in my father’s day. Also from Chicago as I recall. Father traveled as well, you know. Seem to remember a story about a meat packing enterprise and a missing wife… fairly unsavory business but compelling to a lad as I was when father told the tale. Don’t suppose he was a relative of yours?” Spike remembered the story of the real-life murderer whose crime had reminded him a bit of the old penny dreadful story of Sweeny Todd. The sordid story had made the newspapers even in Europe at the time. He and Dru had laughed at the idea of humans eating humans unknowingly even if it had never been proven.

 

Spike’s new friend shifted uncomfortably. ‘Bingo!’ Spike smirked. ‘Has the dosh but the family name went in the grinder along with the old man’s wife.’ No wonder the upstart preferred society in the Old Country, less dirty laundry to be remembered.

 

They entered the cafe and were immediately seated.

 

“As I believe I mentioned, I’m Yale, class of ‘35 and a Bonesman till death,” he tittered trying to recapture his image of being someone worth knowing.

 

“And you are here for … the investments?” Spike affected a half-bored expression denoting the dreariness of such topics as money and commerce. “I imagine there are plenty of opportunities for a go-getter here with the current boom.”

 

Heinrich nodded vigorously, “Indeed! I could introduce you around if you're interested.”

 

Spike placed his order and swirled his wineglass like a pro. “And you chose Germany for … family history?”

 

“Well, I was in the Bund back in the States. Youth leader at the Grafton Wisconsin camp even.” His chest puffed out in pride. “When Fritz Kuhn worked up a party of his best people to come over for the Olympics… well, how could I say no?” He laughed and seemed to feel his pride restored once again. “Do you know of Kuhn?”

 

Spike looked at Luetgert as if he were an encroaching worm to even ask. “Heard the radio broadcast of his speech at Madison Square Garden back in February. Takes after Herr Hitler a bit.”

 

Heinrich grinned widely, “That he does. He gets the crowds eating out of the palm of his hand. Stirs something deep.”

 

‘Bigotry and hate,’ Spike thought. ‘Add a dash of fear and you have the makings of a right nasty brew. Call that bein’ a rabble-rouser. Keyword bein’ rabble.’ Spike quirked a brow. “Yes, quite like the Fuhrer.”

 

“I say! Isn’t it a bit uncomfortable being British here at the moment? I don’t mean to imply anything, of course, but I get a bit of side-eye from time to time just for speaking English.”

 

“As I believe I stated, I’m a citizen of the world. Haven’t traveled with a British passport in years.” Spike laughed to himself. ‘Haven’t traveled with any true papers for longer than this ass has been breathing.’

 

“I see. Fellow ex-patriot then.” Heinrich dug into his spaetzle with obvious relish. Then again he wasn’t going to have to worry about running to fat.

 

“Something like that. Though I do believe I’ve heard that Herr Hitler thinks of my people as Aryan cousins of sorts anyway.”

 

“True,” Heinrich nodded. “Shame that the wrong brother’s on the throne at the moment. Edward was more understanding about what’s at stake here, the kind of world we’re building. That’s why the Fuhrer had to expand, reclaim ancient Germanic lands, make room for the race to thrive again. It helps everyone to get rid of the detritus that’s accumulated over the years. To build the world he envisions requires sacrifice and change. It’s a brave new world, one where the cream needs room to rise.”

 

Just that March the Nazi’s had invaded Czechoslovakia in direct violation of the Munich Agreement. Now the word was holding its breath as Poland was being sized up for conquest. Hitler and crafty Joe Stalin had entered into a pact making official the plan to divide the beleaguered small nation filled with Poles, Slavs, and Jews… all groups dismissed by those looking for racial purity. War was inching ever closer.

 

“What are your plans for that Lincoln then, Heinrich?”

 

“I appreciate Fritz and his intentions but I think I’ll sell her. Won’t do to be promoting the new ‘People’s Car’ while driving an import, even one as snazzy as the roadster.”

 

“I might be in the market,” Spike hinted.

 

Heinrich’s smile broadened. “My, it is my lucky day to have run into you like this! Make a new friend of the right sort and save myself advertising costs at the same time,” the smarmy man chuckled.

 

“And don’t downplay the importance of a good meal,” Spike pointed his fork at his companion.

 

That meal completed, pleasantries came to an unexpected (for Luetgert at least) abrupt ending.

 

Spike proudly drove his new baby back to the demon quarter and home his belly full of Schnitzel, fine Reisling and about 11 pints of terrified human. Heinrich’s body was unlikely to be found where Spike had left it and really there were so many bodies to be found if one knew where to look.

 

‘Bit of forgery and this baby will be all legal and proper,’ Spike mused. Some nights were sweet indeed.

 

***

 

Dru was coiled around her latest conquest. The Lister backed out of the bedroom quickly when Spike arrived home.

 

“Um… I’ll just be going. Please tell Miss Dru,” he spotted Spike’s clenched fists and glare of death. “Never mind. I’ll just move along. Planning a trip to the countryside anyway. Need to get some rest before heading out,” he scooted out the door with supernatural speed.

 

Dru yawned, “My Spike! Come, come home to Princess at last.” she held out her arms in welcome. “Miss Edith missed you and so did I.” She licked blood from her fingers and rolled the dead girl from the divan at the end of the bed. “We ‘ad ever such a nice time with…” she looked puzzled as she tried to put a name to the face of her last lover, finally giving up. “The unsatisfying Lister beast.”

 

She covered her mouth with her hands and giggled. “I do hope ‘e’s gone now. Not nice I can’t remember ‘is name. There shall be punishment for Miss Edith instead of cake tonight,” she whined and pouted. “But you’re ‘ere now and mummy knows ‘er boy by all ‘is names,” she playfully ran her fingernails up Spike’s chest drawing blood.

 

“Tell mummy who ‘er boy was tonight?”

 

Spike laughed. “Let the bloke practically write my biography for me. Eager to make…” he put on the stuffiest upper-class accent, “proper connections, don’t you know.” He pretended to adjust an invisible monocle.

 

Dru laughed along with him. “My boy was a proper gent then?”

 

“Ever so.” He kissed her soundly. “Now I’m ready to be anything but proper.” He pealed her nightgown down her shoulders and tried to not think about who or what was just there a short while ago. He growled.

 

Dru pulled away slightly. “The Lister beast brought me dinner, such a sweet boy. But mummy missed her Spike.”

 

Spike wished Dru could be content with just ‘her Spike’ once again. She had some periods in their joined lives where he had been enough for her after all. “Spike doesn’t like to share,” he reminded her and made a grab for her to draw her back into his embrace.

 

“I have needs, my Spike,” she lowered her eyes. “If it makes you feel better, the demon didn’t satisfy.”

 

Spike really didn’t want to discuss Dru’s dissatisfaction with her latest lover. He supposed it was better than listening to a glowing review, however. Best to change the subject. “Got us a new pretty, Princess.”

 

Dru perked up. “Someone young and yummy?”

 

He laughed and stepped over the dead girl who had evidently also not satisfied Dru’s appetites completely. “Not gonna eat my baby,” he teased.

 

“A baby,” Dru practically drooled. It was so seldom that Spike let her indulge her darkest pleasures!

 

“Not that kind, pet. ‘Sides you’ve …” he kissed her shoulder, “already eaten.”

 

Dru’s lower lip jutted out and quivered a bit. “Wot kind than?”

 

“Wheels, pet. New, classy, wheels for my classy lady’s chariot.”

 

Dru looked disappointed.

 

“You’ll love her! She’s a roadster. We can put the top down and let the moonlight make your raven tresses shine as they blow in the wind.” Spike sifted those locks through his fingers worshipfully.

 

“Moonshine and sunshine for my boy… but not at the same time,” she shook her head determinedly. “It’s Princesses turn.”

 

“Always, love.” Spike led her out to inspect their new acquisition.

 

***

 

The world was at war. By September of 1939, Hitler had made good on his plans and invaded Poland followed by declarations from Britain and France that they were done with placating him. The long-anticipated war was officially on.

 

Thus far life in Berlin hadn’t changed too much. Life in their household had gotten rather loud and bloody though. Spike was having more and more trouble containing Dru as her demon stayed in the forefront and her desires became impossible to satisfy.

 

Dru was giddy at the reports coming back from the front. “Rivers of blood and so much fear, Spike!” Her demon was insisting on following the army to make conquests of her own.

 

Spike had been unable to convince her that battlefields only sounded appealing and that it was unlikely she would sate her desires in freedom for long before finding herself either dusted or shuffled off to one of the growing numbers of camps holding the unwanted of humanity.

 

They were fighting now. It wasn’t just uncomfortable but painful to watch. Buffy knew that Spike had given up so much of his own desires trying to be all that Dru had wanted. He gave to his lover all she asked for and more. Dru had finally desired one thing that she hadn’t been able to manipulate, demand, or threaten Spike into giving her though. The fear for her safety made Spike take a firm stand. In fact, he was insisting they leave Germany and not to follow the troops.

 

“Looks like the best plan is to head to Switzerland then to the South of France and a ship somewhere far afield… maybe South America. What do you say, Poodle… Brazil and Carnival?”

 

“Warsaw,” Dru demanded. “I can feel the despair calling to me.”

 

“Not happening, Dru.” Spike folded his map. “This time we’re doing it my way. You need to get some sleep so we can get an early start. I want to be on the road as soon as the sun sets.”

 

Dru huffed but did begin to pack. Spike looked relieved. His bags were already at the door ready to join the things he’d already tucked into the boot of his beauty.

 

He smiled tenderly at Dru, grateful that the tension had eased at long last and seeking to placate her a bit. “We’ll even stop by an orphanage on our way out. You can eat buffet style.”

 

Buffy cringed. He hadn’t indulged Dru’s love of young victims in ages. She had sincerely hoped never to have to witness something like that again but it seemed her hopes were to be in vain.

 

Spike slipped under the covers fully dressed. He didn’t expect Dru to be up for any kiss and cuddle under the circumstances. He was simply grateful that it wasn’t to be fists and fangs. He was so bloody tired!

 

***

 

The twilight was giving way to nights dark pull when Spike awoke. He automatically reached for Dru to begin their day with a kiss and a promise. The bed was empty.

 

He began to panic as he searched the small apartment for his lover. There was no trace of her or her baggage except the blindfolded Deanna Durbin doll left on the small table. There was a folded sheet of paper on the doll’s lap.

 

“Fish cannot fly and I must swim, my Spike. Not your time to take wing, but not your time to drown either.”

 

Nothing else, not even a signature or word of affection. ‘Not a goodbye though,’ Spike tried to console himself. ‘Probably making a statement. Tryin’ to force me to give in.’

 

He sighed and bit his lower lip unsure just what to do. He could stay there until Dru returned, she was never gone more than a day or two in the past. “Best get everything back in place till she comes home. Still not goin’ to bloody Poland!”

 

He headed for the garage to retrieve their belongings only to find that Dru wasn’t the only thing missing.

 

“Hey, Spike!” It was Grack the cinema owner. “Nearly got run over by that jackass Sp’Nara. Surprised you let him take your two ladies out for a spin.”

 

Spike blinked in confusion. Sp’Nara was the local head of the black market and one of Dru’s court of admirers. Spike couldn’t stand the bastard for a long list of reasons, not the least of which was having to clean everything the demon touched. Now Grack seemed to be saying that the fungus demon was sliming up his car as well as his woman!

 

This time he was going to make Dru grovel… once she came back that was. Spike leaned against the garage wall then slowly slid down to sit, dejected, as he tried to figure out just what to do in the meantime.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N
> 
> German-American Bund https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/German_American_Bund 
> 
> Skull and Bones https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Skull_and_Bones
> 
> Adolph Luetgert https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Adolph_Luetgert
> 
>  
> 
> 20,000 people gathered at Madison Square Garden, NYC in 1939 to rally around the Nazi movement and in support of Hitler. This was a product of the amazingly popular Bund groups that had youth camps and lots of support here in the USA https://youtu.be/MxxxlutsKuI 
> 
> Bear in mind this is the USA and 1939! https://youtu.be/yiOpgHSDbBw The Bund organizations only closed up shop (officially) after Pearl Harbor. The Bund movement spurred other groups such as the “America First” groups that had members such as Charles Lindbergh and Sargeant Shriver https://youtu.be/ycHvBT6op5Q They also closed up shop with Pearl Harbor.
> 
> Folk singer Woody Guthrie had a popular song about the movement and their uncomfortable cozy relationship with Hitler’s Nazi movement https://youtu.be/_k83WArW5XU though some were members only because they were isolationists. Still, it kept the USA from acting on Hitler until he had already taken a lot of territories and amassed power not to mention imprisoned, enslaved and murdered thousands and thousands of people.
> 
>  
> 
> Quick Khan course on the rise of the Nazi power https://youtu.be/QCkn5bu8GgM
> 
>  
> 
> Invasion of Poland https://youtu.be/pw2PenZYBuw
> 
> Britain and France declare war https://youtu.be/rtJ_zbz1NyY
> 
>  
> 
> Fungus demon as shown in the comics: [](https://imgur.com/qzcC3Tp)


	27. Chapter 27

[](https://imgur.com/qr9E5JF)

Chapter 27

He was spiraling. Buffy had watched Spike as he waited for Dru to return in vain. Spike didn’t leave the small apartment after sundown for at least a couple of weeks. He used his unique lack of aversion to the sun to take care of his needs but in the hours when his Beloved might be expected to return he was sure to be there.

 

After those first few weeks, he would venture out to his old haunts in the demon community but rarely sober. Many of his friends quickly changed directions when they saw him coming. Even though they all felt sorry for his situation, having a volatile vampire broiling with emotions in your face was a situation few dared brave.

 

“Look, Spike, I run a respectable business here. Yeah, it’s a tavern but we serve families… you know that.” The harried bar owner had clearly had enough. “You can’t keep coming in here picking fights and tearing things up! I’m sorry about your lady leaving you like that but you’ve got to move on. If not emotionally, at least from my bar. Until you can act like the demon you used to be you need to find another place.”

 

Spike stumbled a bit and looked uncomprehendingly through bloodshot eyes. “You sayin’ my custom’s no longer welcome?”

 

“I’m saying that until you straighten up your act, you need to find another place to frequent… yes.”

 

Spike tried to straighten up and look forbidding but only managed to look even more pathetic and distraught. “Fine then! Your loss.” He weaved his way out of the last bar in demon town to have put up with him. “Plenty of beer halls in Berlin, can’t swing a cat without hittin’ one.”

 

“Dru didn’t leave me!” he shouted his denial as the door swung closed. “We’re eternal. She’s just mad’s all.” The irony of his words struck him and he began to giggle only to have the laughter dissolve into sobs.

 

“Come on Spike! I know this is the first time she’s dumped you but it won’t be the last. Get a grip!” Buffy tried to encourage him even while knowing he couldn’t see or hear her. Still, he’d always seemed to pick up on her strongest emotions so maybe he could sense these.

 

“Know what you’re thinkin’,” he spoke to his invisible companion as he slid down the wall that could no longer support him. “If I’d just learned right and proper from Angelus I’d keep her happy as … well happy anyway.”

 

He sat with his head down and let the tears flow. “Worthless’s what I am just like the old bastard always said. Too soft. Like the livin’ too much, or their world at least. Pathetic excuse for a vampire. Didn’t matter how many innocents I killed or if I joined in his twisted art projects… never enough.” He slumped over in the dank alley and passed out.

 

“No,” Buffy looked at him with sadness, “you did plenty of evil. I’ve seen it all. But you still have good in you and no one to tell you how special that is… that you are. The one thing you should be proud of and you can’t be. It takes a lot more strength to hang on to the human bits in you then to let the demon take charge. I wish you could see that.”

 

Buffy thought back to the night William was turned. “I can’t remember what she said completely but Dru saw it the night she turned you. Something about you living in worlds others couldn’t even imagine and about your strong heart. She saw it then and was not so crazy that she couldn’t see it as strength. It’s what drew her to you even if she can’t appreciate it right now while she’s totally messed up. She’ll be back, Spike… at least for a while.”

 

Buffy sat next to him trying to offer what solace she could. She wished she had her body because if anyone needed a hug right then it was Spike.

 

Buffy remembered seeing him like this last year, and for the same reason too. Her mom had given him hot chocolate and sympathy, a shoulder to cry on and ear to listen.

 

Buffy cringed a bit remembering how she herself had reacted to his pain. No sympathy at all, just disgust and fear.

 

She’d never removed Spike’s invitation to her house and seeing him there in the kitchen with her mom had terrified her. Then again, even once that long night had passed where she’d been reminded that Spike had access to her house, she’d not removed his invitation. On some level, she’d known he’d never hurt her mom or her by abusing that access. ‘Huh! Guess He’s had some of my trust for a while now.’

 

She remembered how wasted he’d been and how he didn’t seem too worried about her using a kitchen implement to make a pile of dust of him, almost seemed to welcome it.

 

“I was so self-righteous and superior, convinced Spike couldn’t love without a soul. He pissed me off looking heartbroken when it seemed a mockery of the love I was certain I had with Angel. All I could think of was how I couldn’t be with my soul mate and here was a soulless vampire mourning his cheating girlfriend who’d dumped him!

 

What a stupid, ignorant little girl … and kind of a bitch too the way I made fun of his heartache.” She ghosted (literally) a hand over his head in a semblance of comfort. “Angel knew better even if I didn’t. He knew Spike really could love… did love Dru. I knew it too, deep down,” she admitted to herself.

 

She thought back to how she’d known all along that she could get Spike to do anything just by threatening Dru. She’d used the tactic more than once.

 

“I’m not even sure if I did love Angel really even though it felt like it. It was powerful and all-consuming especially after he came back from hell,” she reflected morosely. “But how could it have been this great eternal love when we never talked? Neither of us really knew each other, didn’t spend a lot of time together except when he’d come by with some dire warning or would watch me on patrol… or when I slept.”

 

She shivered as she pictured that scene and remembered how her sixteen-year-old self had found it romantic. So many things she had thought of that way were creepy in hindsight, so much of his ‘courtship’ of her had been stuff he’d done when hunting prey before the soul.

 

She remembered her first impressions of Angel and how not-romantic she found him. “I remember how he wouldn’t even tell me his name for a long time much less that he was a vampire. I even told him that if he was gonna pop up with his ‘Cryptic Wise Man’ act on a regular basis that he should at least tell me his name. It’s like I got dumber instead of smarter where Angel was concerned.” She sat and thought a bit trying to figure out how he went from creepy, cryptic kinda stalker guy to the love of her life.

 

She thought about how brief their love relationship had actually been before he’d had the soul loved out of him. She remembered that she had started to put it and him in her past and move forward only to have hell spit him back into her life.

 

That was when the grand tragic opera had really begun. That was when it was all urgent yearning and ill-starred angst. That was when Buffy had decided their love was the deepest and most grand love in history even in the face of the fates that kept them apart. It had to be that big, that legendary because it had cost too much to be otherwise. People had died and the world had nearly been sucked into hell. She’d had to run a sword through her first love and send him into that very same hell. With a price that high, the love had to be worth it...didn’t it? 

 

In the end, it hadn’t mattered. After months of pulling her by the heart to himself only to push her away, Angel had chosen to leave her. If he had truly known her he would have realized that was the easiest way to wound her… abandonment! She could take the pain and angst of not being able to be together fully, but being left with nothing but a backward glance through the smoke had done her in like nothing else could have.

 

She looked at Spike as he let out a timely drunken snore. “Spike knows Dru. Her good and her bad and he loves her anyway. It might not be smart, but it is real. How could I ever have compared that kind of thing to what my relationship with Angel was? No wonder it pissed him off!”

 

***

 

“... so she left me. Took my beautiful baby and just left with her latest lover,” Spike was drowning his misery at a human ratskeller this time and telling his woes to the sympathetic barmaid.

 

“Such a trollop to not only leave you but take your child,” she commiserated. “That’s evil!”

 

“Eh?” Spike glanced bleary-eyed at her trying to make sense of what she’d just said. “What child? And yeah, Dru’s evil, it's one of the things I love about her.”

 

“Your child. You said she took your baby,” the confused barmaid reminded him.

 

“My Lincoln! Roadster and fully loaded with upgrades,” he crowed proudly his voice betraying the longing for the lost vehicle.

 

“A car? You’ve been whining about a car? Maybe your wife had good reason to leave,” the woman huffed, all her sympathy evaporating. “Men! I hope this lover of hers will see her worth.”

 

Spike was incensed. “Get slime all over ‘em both. ‘Sides I could deal with losing the car… it’s Dru I can’t replace.”

 

The barmaid crossed her arms over her chest. “Maybe you’ve learned your lesson then. Maybe you will treat your next woman better.” the barmaid conceded.

 

“Won’t be another. Dru’s it for me. I was made for her… literally.”

 

“You say that now. Wait until the hurt passes and you see a pretty fraulein, you’ll be like all the rest.” She picked up his empty stein and returned to the bar.

 

***

 

“Bleedin’ bitch!” Spike raged. He was past denial and waist deep in anger by now. “Gave her the best 62 years of my life, I did. Let her make me any way she wanted me to be. Turned myself inside out. Let her lead me around by my short-hairs all over the bloody planet. Always let her call the tune, danced her style.”

 

Buffy had watched him rant and pace for hours. For once she was glad not to have a body because she would have had a blinding headache from it by now. ‘I probably would have pummeled him by now too.’

 

It was a bit of an improvement because at least he wasn’t soaked in alcohol. Now it was fury that fueled him, made him get up each evening and kind of function.

 

Spike was lonely. That wasn’t really a new feeling. Living with someone as challenged as Dru often had led to periods of loneliness. Nonetheless as lonely as he’d been at times he’d never actually been alone before. He didn’t like it. He took bizarre comfort in that old feeling of someone being right there with him, some unseen, silent companion.

 

“Don’t know what you are,” he’d said to Buffy. “First I thought you were some avenging Angel sent to judge me. Then after I met the first Slayer and got those same tinglies I figured it must be the Slayer spirit been hauntin’ me cause it felt the same only stronger.” Spike laughed ruefully. “Maybe I’m just off my nutter like Dru and you’re my own personal Pixie.” He shook his head, “Just know I feel you. Even if you’re findin’ me in want, glad you’re here. Don’t do well alone it seems.”

 

“Look, I’ll behave, give you nothin’ to judge, if you’ll just help me figure out where to find Dru,” His voice was so low that Buffy nearly missed what he’d said.

 

Buffy wished she did know and could tell him then hold him to that bargain. One thing she knew about Spike was that his word was good. He might be tricky and slippery with the wording but if you got him to make a deal and got the wording straight, he was good for it.

 

***

Time and distance went at a blur. 

 

The carnage had moved quickly. The bloody fields and cities of Poland that had called to Dru in the year before she’d bolted had been joined by a much wider area since she’d gone. Before she’d driven off into the night Hitler’s forces had occupied Denmark and Norway followed by the Netherlands, Belgium, Luxembourg and even France. Britain itself was under constant bombardment as the blitz, as it was called, continued day and night raining terror on people in Spike’s homeland.

 

Spike eventually located the Fungus demon selling forged baptismal certificates to the desperate in Buda… or maybe it was in Pest he couldn’t remember which side of the Danube it had been. What he DID remember with glee was the look on Sp’Nara’s face when he confronted the woman and car stealing walking mucus! There had been some satisfaction in that death even if Spike had to scrub for days to get all the muck off of him.

 

The car was wrecked and Dru long gone by the time Spike had his good day and so he continued the hunt even as the possible locations calling to Dru widened by the day.

 

The loose cooperation between Stalin and Hitler was nothing but old history as the Fuhrer kept Poland as his own spoil and had now turned his sights and guns on the Soviet Union itself. Three million German troops had invaded the USSR and now they were bogged down by the same thing that had once halted Napoleon…. The harsh Russian winter.

 

“Even the soddin’ States are in the game now,” Spike sighed. “Not that Dru’d head back there when there are battlefields all over Europe to choose from.” The USA might be in the war after Hitler’s ally Hirohito had bombed the Pacific fleet into oblivion in Hawaii. ‘Still, the chance of the war being fought on US soil’s far less than on this side of the pond,’ he reasoned. ‘That’s what called to Dru the blood and gore. She’ll still be somewhere over here.’

 

Hell, she had all of Europe and even Northern Africa to play in! Spike had been following every lead, every rumor, trying to locate his beloved for the past couple of years once he’d admitted to himself that she wasn’t coming back on her own.

 

She wasn’t the only vampire drawn to the battlefields, camps, and ghettos of Hitler’s horrorscape. He’d met some demons who claimed to have seen her and some massacres that had her unique stamp all over them but never when Spike was in the area.

 

He was fairly sure a couple of orphanages were her handiwork. A refugee camp for fleeing Greeks in Gaza had also had the earmarks of Dru’s singular brand of slaughter. The world seemed full of refugees. Desperate people fleeing death and starvation only to be turned away in many cases.

 

The United States, home of the Statue of Liberty with the words of welcome to the world’s displaced and desperate had even turned them away as far back as 1939 when an entire boatload of hopeful were turned back only to end up in the death camps. People already in dire straights were finding hearts hardened by propaganda or fear making places of safety hard to come by.

 

Spike had scoured as much of the Continent and even beyond into the Middle East in pursuit of every lead, every possibility. He’d traced the last of Dru’s trademark kills to Barcelona and was starting to think he might finally find his Princess at long last.

 

There was a rumor of a private group who had parties where virgin blood flowed like water. It was just the sort of thing to perk up Dru’s Pixies and get them whispering into her ears. Now all Spike had to do was get to Madrid in time then find an invitation to the party.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter End Notes:  
> The London blitz https://youtu.be/jvxPid5xB3Y
> 
> Refugee crisis worldwide https://youtu.be/UsxMSrbSNLM
> 
> USA enters the war after Dec. 7, 1941 bombing of Pearl Harbor. https://youtu.be/AHSU3gEyoPI
> 
> The world at war as the battleground expands https://youtu.be/JNmyhDIDUKs
> 
> Budapest in the 40’s https://youtu.be/Fxmz0Mpd6uU
> 
> And because a bit of lightness is necessary I give you the Andrews Sisters https://youtu.be/OfWc52smNs8


	28. Chapter 28

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bits of dialogue from Angel episode Why We Fight written by Drew Goddard & Steven S. DeKnight

[](https://imgur.com/ZIVqqQR)

Chapter 28

 

“Spike, you bonehead! Sober up and look around.” Buffy had never wished to make herself heard so much in all the years she’d played Casper to Spike’s Dracula, only less see and talkable. She’d seen the Nazi Uniforms on the guests in the side room even if Spike hadn’t. True he was focusing his alcohol addled attention on trying to find Dru at this obvious set-up.

 

“William! As I live and breathe,” a voice from the past bellowed. “What brings you to sunny Madrid and where is that lovely fey vixen you’re always with?”

 

Spike startled from his perusal of the large room. So far no Dru and no virgin blood either from the looks of it. God knew Pierre Drieu La Rochelle was no virgin if he was one of the offerings. Frankly, Spike had no desire to rekindle the acquaintance of the French writer known for his embrace of fascism. “Berlin got a lot less enjoyable. Moved on. Dru’s off on one of her tears for a bit. Thought we’d reconnect here. You haven’t seen her have you?”

 

“Not since gay Paree. Ah! Those were the days weren’t they?”

 

Spike closed his eyes to hide his sadness at the thought of all he’d lost since they’d left his happy life there in Paris. “Yeah. Best I’ve had,” he swallowed his grief and sadness, Adam's apple bobbing. “What brought you here? Thought you’d still be in Paris… how’d you put it? Oh yeah, ‘fighting mediocrity’… till your last breath.”

 

Pierre shrugged, “Ennui, you know how it is.” He sighed deeply. “Another war comes along making that last one look like nothing but a prelude. All the interesting people scatter. Now Paris is as full of Hitler’s boys as Berlin or Munich.” He leaned in closer to whisper in Spike’s ear. “Much as I sympathize politically, they can be quite boring socially. Zealots usually are. Shame really. The typical German knows how to throw a decent party, but…” he looked about in disdain, “Not this lot.”

 

Spike also looked around. “Seen livelier funerals.”

 

“Absolutely!,” he nudged Spike with an elbow. “Went to a fair number of jolly wakes over the last few years.” he laughed

 

‘Caused a few too,’ Spike thought and gave a sardonic grin to his companion. “So what brings you to this one?” Spike couldn’t imagine the lure of blood would interest Pierre even as jaded as he was.

 

“Was promised some willing virgins would be in attendance. Man can’t pass that up can he?”

 

‘Huh! ‘Same basic lure only different virgin parts.’ Buffy thought in disgust. “Men! What’s the deal with virgins anyway… just a tiny bit of skin and not every girl still has it if they’ve been active like on a cheer line.”

 

“Thought that might catch my Wicked Plum’s eye myself… why I’m here. Prefer a woman who knows what’s what actually. Don’t look like any virgins here willing or not unless you’ve a hankering for a Nazi with a stick up his arse wantin’ something a bit more mobile.”

 

“Ah, he did see them,” Buffy sighed in relief.

 

The man laughed and clapped Spike on the back. “Not much into what’s on offer or I should say not wanting into what’s on offer. Oh well… better than another evening of bad food and company. At least I met up with you.”

 

“Thanks ever so, but I’m not stayin’ if Dru’s not here.”

 

“Did I overhear you’re looking for another guest,” a smartly dressed German officer interrupted. “Perhaps I could check the guest list for you?”

 

Spike perked up. This was an unexpected bit of help. “That’d be great. My lady wouldn’t miss a party like this, can’t imagine her not being here if she’s in town.”

 

The officer led Spike off to the side room and away from prying eyes.

 

“Don’t fall for it Spike you idiot,” Buffy yelled futilely as she followed Spike to his fate.

 

***

 

Spike tried to rip the chains out that tethered him to a metal pillar of some sort. The area was dimly lit with a faint red glow adding to the eeriness of the illumination.

 

“Buggering hell!” He wondered vaguely if he’d been dusted and this actually was hell or at least its antechamber. The feeling was claustrophobic and reminded him of awakening in his tomb when first turned. He didn’t like it one bit. “What Cack-handed minge took a hammer to my noggin? Be wearin’ your guts like a bloody necklace once I’m free.” He shook the chains and went into game face to give himself a power boost.

 

“There is no point, my friend.”

 

Spike looked and saw two other captives. One dressed like someone’s idea of a vampire in a cheap film and running a bit to fat. The other a bit like a smaller version of Darla’s beloved Master. Both were chained much as Spike was. “What bad Hollywood horror show rejected the pair of you?”

 

The taller more portly one straightened up and gave him an icy stare. “I am Nostroyev, an ancient and powerful vampire known throughout the western world. You should show proper respect!”

 

Spike laughed in genuine amusement. “That right? Well, Angelus never got me to show proper respect to him and he was my grandsire. ‘Sides never heard of you.”

 

“Angelus? The line of Aurelius Angelus? The Scourge of Europe? Whirlwind?” Spike hoped the tosspot had run out of labels for his family at last.

 

“Now see. You have heard of me you poncy plonker. Only thing you’d terrorize is anyone with a sense of fashion.”

 

Buffy had to agree with him. The littler guy kind of reminded her of old bat face a bit. A face only a mother could love and she wasn’t his mother.

 

“And just where are we?”

 

The smaller vampire shrugged. “Not certain. Like you, we were drugged and awakened to this place.” He rattled his chains and looked about despondently.

 

“Not real helpful there Nosferatu. You do any better Mr. Ancient and Powerful?”

 

“We were lured to a party promising virgin blood. There are at least 4 others in another room. These Nazi’s seem to have made it a point to capture vampires and perhaps a demon or two as well judging from the sounds of Fyral cursing I’ve heard from time to time.”

 

Spike looked at short and ugly, “See! Now that at least is informative.” He thought about how he came to be a captive and asked, “Seen any female vampires among the others?”

 

“I don’t think this is the time for a romance my friend.”

 

Spike gave him a look that could dust. “Number one… not your friend. Number two… there is no number two unless you’ve seen a dark-haired goddess in chains round about, then we’ll revisit the idea of becomin’ pals.”

 

“No such creature here that I’ve seen and all the demons at the party were male.”

 

“Well I don’t know about the Braznarc, hard to tell with them,” Bat Face added.

 

Spike sighed and slumped down a bit in his chains. It had all been for nothing then. Well, he’d get free, get rid of a few vampnapping Nazi’s and keep looking.

 

***

One of the future entrees strutted into the area where the three vampires were being held. “Sprichst du Deutsch?”

 

Spike glared. Nostroyev replied in Russian, “Nyet”, and the Prince of Lies lived up to his name by also denying the ability.

 

“Fine. We’ll try English then since their arrogance has forced most of the world to learn their language if they wish to communicate,” he sneered. “I assume you can understand English?”

 

“Assumin’ you can speak it, Hans.”

 

Spike got clubbed for his defiant snark.

 

The German turned and spoke to someone in the hallway behind him. “Bring me the kriegstagebuck. Admiral Doenitz will want an accurate account of the interrogation.” He watched the young sailor stumble off. “Dummkopf. Acts as if he suffers from blechkoller,” he muttered under his breath.

 

“We will begin once he returns,” he settled himself on a small chair and lapsed into stony silence.

 

“Mind tellin’ a bloke just where ‘here’ is or would that mess up your diabolical master plan?”

 

The Nazi gave Spike a look that made it clear that Spike had no right to ask for anything. ‘Ah well. No harm in conversation. Perhaps the monster will be more forthcoming if we chat a bit,’ he relented.

 

“You are prisoners of war on board the Fuhrer’s Submarine designated U-376, an experimental submarine currently nearing the Bay of Biscay.”

 

“And why are we prisoners of war? Not like there’s some alliance between vamps and the allies. Strictly non-combatants at least where your war’s concerned.”

 

The Nazi smiled in a chilling parody of amusement. “That will change. You have no loyalties to your nations of birth then?”

 

“Haven’t been back to Ole’ Blighty in more years than you’ve been alive I reckon.”

 

Nostroyev spoke up. “I am in exile ever since the unwashed masses overran the Kremlin. I was once Rasputin’s lover,” he boasted. “The true Russia is gone I fear.”

 

Spike raised an eyebrow, “Thought Rasputin was a vampire?”

 

‘Yeah, me too,’ Buffy agreed.

 

“Half Sadecki demon. Still powerful mojo though.”

 

“Huh. Well, word was he was interested in the ladies, not some prancing Dracula wanna-be. By the way, I happen to know Drac too and willing to bet he’s never heard of you either.”

 

Spike turned his attention back to the Nazi officer. “So why shanghai a bunch of vamps and demons?”

 

“I work for a special branch of the SS. Once we discovered that your kind existed we realized the potential. We have done all we can to capture some of the strongest and more promising of you for use in the war effort.”

 

Spike remembered his encounter with a band of the thugs who interfered with his battle with that Slayer a while back. They had known at once what he was and had assumed the girl was a vampire or demon as well. That assumption had cost the chit her life.

 

“A vampire army? That’s daft. What makes you think any of us have any interest in your cause or takin’ orders from our lunch?”

 

“I believe we will learn how to tame you well enough to make you useful, demon.” he smiled wickedly.

 

The sailor returned and handed the diary to his superior before stepping out again.

 

“Let us begin. You will tell me of your personal origins and strengths.”

 

*** 

 

The interrogation hadn’t gone well, at least where Spike was concerned. All the years with Angelus trying to break him had only made him into an exercise in frustration for the officer. His knuckles were every bit as bruised as Spike’s body before he moved on to the other two vampires hoping for better results.

 

They had not been weaned under the less-than-tender care of Angelus so they had soon answered every question asked giving Spike only a bit of time to work on breaking the chains that bound him.

 

Once free, Spike made quick work of killing the local draft board recruiter and draining him of his precious vampire healing red stuff.

 

“Nothin’ like a few pints of human on tap to heal right up,” he crowed and then proceeded to strip the corpse of his uniform.

 

Spike stripped off his own ripped and bloodied clothes and donned the officer's garb. He grinned at the other two gaping vampires, “Sieg Heil,” he mock saluted them then released them from their chains. “Wanna see what’s on the menu of this fine cruise liner? He grinned diabolically and slipped into game face.

 

***

 

“Quiet!” the handsome young man whispered and then motioned for his raiding party to find a safe place to hide.

 

Sam Lawson had been horrified to discover the submarine they had snuck aboard had far more than the escaped German naval officers and the boat’s regular crew on board. There were monsters! Creatures right out of a nightmare.

 

At the moment they were newly free and rampaging through the sub killing and wreaking havoc. Sooner or later Sam and his men were going to have to step in if they wanted to salvage this mission.

 

They had successfully infiltrated the escaped POWs and gained access to the submarine and waited for an opportunity to seize the boat and turn it over to the United States Navy. So far, they had been stymied but now with these monsters running amok, it looked like their luck had turned. All they had to do was let the demons take out the Nazi’s then subdue the demons and it would be a piece of cake, or so the young American sailor assured his men.

 

They hadn’t counted on the side trip to Spain that had resulted in the inclusion of these monsters but it looked like fortune was going to favor the brave once again.

 

***

 

The non-vamp demons proved the old rule of thumb that demons didn’t play well together.

 

Even though they maimed and killed their share of their captors, they also turned on one another. By the time the battle was over it left Spike and his two new friends as the lone demons alive. The screams and scenes they had witnessed had been nauseating and terrifying.

 

Lawson’s group managed to lock them out of the command and control center of the submarine and they turned the boat back to the west and homeward at last.

 

Admiral King would just have to accept three vampires along with the submarine once they’d gotten to port. All Sam had to do was keep the three remaining monsters at bay long enough to get her there.

 

The banging terrified the already spooked crew and the fear heightened as a man without even scuba gear emerged from the torpedo tubes.

 

Lawson looked at the newcomer. “You wanna tell me how a man gets 400 feet down without so much as a diving suit?”

 

Angel ignored the question. “Which one of you is Captain Franklin?”

 

“Captain’s dead.”

 

Angel finally turned a gimlet eye on the young sailor. “Who’s in charge?”

 

“Suppose that’d be me.”

 

Angel sighed and appeared much put-upon. “Under naval op 4 zero 7, I’m supposed to issue you your order. Charlie Baker Oboe Victor.”

 

Lawson stood straighter. Finally some backup from the brass. “Verification?”

 

“Nautilus”

 

Sam reholstered his firearm and indicated to the others to do likewise. “Yes, sir. All right.”

 

Angel looked down at the weights wrapped around his ankles. “Somebody want to get these things off of me?” This whole exercise was clearly annoying the vampire.

 

“We’re all that’s left. An ensign, a helmsman, a handful of petty officers. Afraid we’re not much,” he shuddered and looked over his shoulder. “Not against them.”

 

“What’s your name, Ensign?”

 

“Lawson, Sir, Sam Lawson.”

 

“Okay Lawson, keep everyone in this room and lock it up.” He strode towards the hatchway.

 

“Yes, sir.” Perhaps the new command didn’t know of the danger lurking on the rest of the submarine. “I’ve seen what those things can do to a man. I wouldn't go out there unarmed, not by yourself.” He offered his sidearm to Angel.

 

“Keep it,” Angel said dismissively, “you may need it.” He deigned to look back at the nervous sailor. “It’s okay Ensign, I know what I’m up against. Don’t open this door for anything other than me.”

 

Buffy rounded the corner just as Angel was accessing the passageway. “Angel?” Her eyes went wide in shock. Her ex was the very last person she’d expected to encounter on this little ship of horrors.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My thanks to JustWriter who generously shared a bit of research with me on German U-boats and other wonderful bits that helped me flesh out this chapter.
> 
> Thanks to her source: https://uboat.net/boats/u376.htm I chose a real U-boat that went missing in the Bay of Biscay on April 7, 1943. No explanation was ever found for its loss. All 47 sailors were lost and it was never proven to have been sunk. U-376 was part of Wolfpack Neptun and had been on a special mission code-named Elster that had taken on German Naval officers who had escaped from a POW camp at North Point on Prince Edward Island, Canada. I decided that was a good place for the US Navy to implant some men with the intention of taking the sub as soon as possible and handing it over to the Allies. Of course, they didn’t count on that side-trip to Madrid I sent them on.
> 
> JustWriter also gave resources that gave several terms used in the German Navy that I used as well:
> 
> Blechkoller or “tin fright” was the term for the PTSD or nervous tension caused by depth charge attacks experienced. It resulted in violence or hysteria in the sufferer. And Kriegstagebuch which is the official name for the log book or war diary kept by the captain of the sub.
> 
> Sedecki demons are canon from the Spike: After the Fall comic. A description can be found here: https://buffy.fandom.com/wiki/Sadecki_demon
> 
>  
> 
> T class was a British style submarine https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/British_T-class_submarine The design of what was to become the T class began in 1934 in order to create a replacement for the first British postwar submarines, the O, P, and R class. For the purposes of this story, the German Sub here is a version of the T class making its appropriation essential to the Allies to assess the technological advances of the German Navy.
> 
> Both the US Admiral of the Atlantic fleet, King and the German Admiral Doenitz were real.
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Karl_D%C3%B6nitz Interestingly enough after the death of Adolf Hitler on April 30, 1945, and in accordance with Hitler’s Will, Dönitz was named Hitler's successor as head of state, with the title of President of Germany and Supreme Commander of the Armed Forces and he served in that capacity until the surrender. For nearly seven decades, Dönitz was the only head of state to be convicted by an international tribunal until the conviction of Liberia's Charles Taylor in April 2012.
> 
>  
> 
> On February 1, 1941, the Atlantic Fleet of the US Navy was resurrected and organized from the Patrol Force. Along with the Pacific and Asiatic Fleet it was to be under the command of a full admiral, which jumped the fleet's commander Ernest J. King’s rank from a two-star to a four-star (nice wartime promotion there).
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/United_States_Fleet_Forces_Command
> 
> A couple of visuals involving German submarines:
> 
> British Royal Navy sinking German U-boats footage https://youtu.be/V6a9KqRt430
> 
> Interior of a WWII German U-boat https://youtu.be/yXiSWPGy_gg
> 
> Pierre Drieu La Rochelle was most likely not in Madrid in 1943 but I have used literary license to put him there to let him have a brief conversation with Spike. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pierre_Drieu_La_Rochelle
> 
> Just to feel the mood I’m including a top hit of 1943 (and one of my favorite singers and songs from that era). The song seems to reflect Spike’s mood regarding Dru and her absence: ‘You’ll Never Know’ sung by Dick Haymes https://youtu.be/1yDfNct7UDE


	29. Chapter 29

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is heavy on canon but I hope I’ve managed to make it more than just a retelling of what was on screen.
> 
> Some dialogue, direct and adapted are from the Angel transcript of “Why We Fight” written by Drew Goddard and Steven S. DeKnight. The character of Sam Lawson was portrayed by Eyal Podell.

[](https://imgur.com/HIZa3f1)

Chapter 29

 

“Angel!” Buffy felt an immediate sense of relief. This was Angel, not the monster she had come to know and loathe since her weird trip to Oz began. It had been decades since the Gypsy’s curse had gifted him with his soul and turned him away from evil. Surely with him here the Powers were stepping in to stop whatever wickedness the Nazi’s were planning to use demons to do.

 

She followed him hoping to see what plan he must have to make this situation right. She was glad that whatever feelings of family he had for Spike would likely be the reason Spike was still around even into her time.

 

Speaking of…

 

“You were captured at a free virgin blood party?” Angel looked at his former protege as if he were as mad as Drusilla.

 

Spike looked a bit embarrassed. “Bit off my game, didn’t see the trap till too late. Lookin’ for Dru, all preoccupied like. Who’d have thought? One minute I’m askin’ a fella why all the virgins looked like Goebbels, next minute I’m comin’ to in chains in this boat.” He grinned and punched Angel on the shoulder lightly, “Feel better knowin’ they got you too.”

 

Angel sneered, clearly not liking the suggestion of comradery. He looked at the two vamps with Spike, “You’re going to have to introduce me.”

 

“Angelus… this is Nostroyev and the Prince of Lies… even if I think that one’s name is the biggest lie of all,” he chuckled then motioned towards Angel. “Nostroyev, Prince of Lies… this is Angelus.”

 

The Russian perked up, “You used to be quite the terror back in the day. Haven’t heard much of you lately though.”

 

“Haven’t heard much of you… ever,” Angel looked down his nose at the fawning vamp.

 

“Nostroyev, Scourge of Siberia and Butcher of Alexander Palace,” the Dracula wanna- be crowed. Angel merely furrowed his brow and shrugged.

 

“Sorry.” his entire body language screamed his lack of being impressed.

 

Spike rolled his eyes. He didn’t want his grand-sire thinking his standards had sunk so low as to have these two clowns as minions. “I broke these two out after I got free. Didn’t know you were back there or I would’ve come for you too. Had our hands full with the sailors.”

 

Angel looked around at all the dead bodies, “Anybody alive back there?”

 

“Just finished the last of them. Any in there?” Spike tried to look past Angel’s broad shoulders.

 

“Couple left in the torpedo room and unless you know how to operate one of these things we’re gonna need their help.”

 

Spike grinned, “How hard can it be?”

 

Buffy rolled her eyes. Spike always did love to wind up Angel. Really it was far too easy to get under his skin.

 

“Tell you what,” Nostroyev grinned, “We’ll leave one alive to work the boat and eat the rest.”

 

Angel grabbed the ax from Nostroyev’s hands and thrust the wooden handle into Nostroyev’s chest showering the Prince of Lies with his late buddy’s ashes.

 

“No humans to be killed until we reach land, is that clear?”

 

Angel motioned the two vampires through the hatchway where the nervous sailors were listening in trepidation.

 

“Lawson, Spike and the Prince of Lies. Put them to work if you need them.”

 

Spike gave a sarcastic salute.

 

Lawson gave Angel a dubious look but began to issue orders to his men. “Start with the batteries, I want juice as soon as possible. O’Shea, you have the helm… Tyler, you’re going to have to handle bow and stern for now.”

 

Spike looked around, “Where does the Captain sit?”

 

Angel scowled at Spike then motioned to a seat as if daring him to continue his antics.

 

Lawson stared at the many bodies heaped in a pile. “Let’s get these bodies out of here.”

 

As his crew jumped to follow the orders the young sailor turned to Angel, “May I speak freely, sir?”

 

Angel nodded.

 

“I recognize there’s a lot going on here that I don’t understand… but those monsters butchered my crew and apparently they’re in the S.S.” he nodded his head towards Spike lolling in the Captain’s chair wearing the stolen uniform.

 

“Spike’s not in the S.S. He just likes wearing the jacket.”

 

“That doesn’t help me understand why we’re working with him or keeping him alive for that matter.”

 

Buffy wondered the same thing even if she was glad for it.

 

“I got him under control.”

 

“Sheeya!” Buffy wondered if even Angel believed that one.

 

“We may be able to use them. We don’t have much of a crew left.

 

Lawson was fuming. “I don’t think we’ll need them. They killed my Captain, sir. They’re monsters and I don’t know why we…”

 

“You don’t need to know why sailor. We gotta bring this sub in. Those are our orders.”

 

“There’s a difference between orders and purpose… sir.” Lawson dared to challenge. “I didn’t sign on cause I needed directions. I saw pictures of what the Krauts were doing. Evil’s spreading sir and it’s not just over there. I’ve been scared out of my mind since I signed on for this duty, but I can keep it together, even handle dying if I know it’s for a greater purpose.”

 

Buffy liked the handsome young man whose sense of duty seemed to mirror her own.

 

“We’ve got a job to do. That job is going to help us win the war. I don’t need you to understand every detail but just know we’re fighting on the same side. I need you to trust that I’m going to get us all through this safe and sound.”

 

‘Typical Angel,’ Buffy thought. ‘Short on the info and long on the expecting blind trust.’

 

Lawson nodded then headed to the controls he had assigned to himself to get in order.

 

***

 

“So. Playin’ for the other team full-out then?” Spike raised a brow at his grand-sire.

 

“Not by choice.”

 

Buffy gasped. What did that mean? Why wouldn’t Angel be helping out the good guys, that’s what Angel did with his soul wasn’t it?

 

“Tried to lay low, just wasn’t low enough. Government figured out what I am and where I was staying. Paid me a visit and gave me an offer I couldn’t refuse… literally.”

 

‘Huh?’ Buffy was confused. Couldn’t Angel see how evil the Nazi’s were? Didn’t he want to stop them? Even Spike seemed to dislike them and enjoy taking them out when he could.

 

“You’d think my keeping to myself and not indulging in any blood baths would be enough for them. All the blood I drink I pay for… stuff the hospitals can’t use. All I wanted in return was for them to leave me the hell alone. It’s hard enough fighting the urges without having humans all around.”

 

“You should’ve taken advantage of that soul of yours and just slid back into bein’ a human,” Spike suggested. “Plenty of ‘em sleep in the daytime and play at night. You could fit right in… aren’t you bored?”

 

“Endlessly,” Angel growled.

 

“Just need to be around the right folks. Had the best time of my life in Paris after the last war before Dru decided we had to get closer to ole’ Adolph and his band of crazy. Daft Bint’s drawn to it like flies to horse manure.”

 

Angel looked at Spike as if he were the one who was crazy. “Why would I want to be around humans when I can’t eat them?” He sighed in exasperation, “Never could break you of that.”

 

“Never could break me at all,” Spike reminded him.

 

“Came close a couple of times,” Angel smiled wistfully.

 

“Keep tellin’ yourself that if it lets you sleep.” Spike glared at Angel.

 

‘Wait… you mean all Angel’s done is avoid people and bag it?’ Buffy was confused. This didn’t sound like the guy she had met and fallen in love with. “Where’s the whole looking for redemption? You sound like you miss being able to rape and torture and kill.” She shuddered and tasted bile in the back of her throat even without her body. “You said… come to think of it you didn’t really say much. But you let me believe…” Buffy felt yet another chain to her past slip free as she realized that most of her image of Angel had come from her own imagination and desire.

 

***

 

Spike kept himself entertained by taunting Angel at every opportunity treating their situation as a great joke. “I want to be called captain. I mean, I did eat him,” Spike goaded.

 

One of the human crew grabbed a wrench and started to head towards the mocking vampire only to have Lawson stop him.

 

“Check the torpedoes before I stuff you in a tube and send you for a swim… Captain.” Angel grabbed Spike by the lapels and shoved him through the hatchway.

 

“We gonna have a situation, sir?” Lawson asked looking a bit like he hoped there’d be an excuse to get rid of one of the monsters left on the boat.

 

“He’ll do what I tell him.”

 

Buffy snorted. ‘Sure.’

 

“Cause you know each other from before this… right?” Lawson was beginning to wonder about this man giving all the orders. “We all knew this might be a suicide mission but you’re asking for quite a leap of faith from my crew, sir.”

 

“Everyone keeps their cool and we might just make it out of this.”

 

A commotion broke out in the next room and Angel rushed to investigate. The Prince of Lies was manhandling the remaining German officer and shouting insults and threats. As he began to squeeze the life from the German, Angel dusted him before the startled eyes of the human crew. Clearly, they hadn’t seen one of the monsters ended this way before.

 

“He exploded!” the crewman’s eyes were popping. “He stabbed him and he just exploded!” He looked down in horror at the pile of dust that once boasted of being the Prince of Lies.

 

“Get back to your stations...NOW!” Lawson feared there’d be a mutiny if he didn’t get everyone back on task quickly.

 

“How does a guy just explode like that?” The sailor and Lawson both looked to Angel in inquiry.

 

“You really need an answer?”

 

“Might help if I heard it for sure,” Lawson said.

 

“Vampire.”

 

Lawson blinked several times. “Yeah. I take it back. Doesn’t help. So what do you think set him off?”

 

Spike was thumbing through a pile of papers that the Prince had been looking through before going after the German. “I’m guessing these had something to do with it. Anybody read German?”

 

When no one offered Spike loomed over the still terrified SS officer. “Better hurry it up before I get peckish.”

 

“Dein Kleingeist wuerde unsere Arbreit echt nicht vestehen.” the Nazi raised his face in haughty defiance.

 

“How’s that again, mate?”

 

Lawson shook his head, “He says you’re an idiot.”

 

Angel’s head jerked as he looked at Lawson with interest. “You speak German?”

 

“Enough to get by.”

 

Spike snarled at the German officer, “Gravy… I’ll menace, you talk.”

 

Lawson began to interrogate the German about the papers that had so upset the Prince of Lies.

 

“He says it’s research.”

 

Spike narrowed his eyes. “What kind?”

 

Lawson asked more questions. Both Angel and Spike paid close attention and needed no translation for the one word that was easily understood… vampire.

 

“What about vampires?”

 

“I don’t know. It’s technical.” Lawson shook his head then looked over the documents himself for the first time. “Something about stimulation and control. They’ve been experimenting on them, cutting into their brains.”

 

“So,” Spike growled, “You were gonna pop our tops and melon-ball us.”

 

“They’re trying to create an army out of things like you.”

 

Spike looked at Angel, “That explains why they nicked us. Cream of the crop. Wanna build an army of vampires slaves you start at the top with the Generals.”

 

Spike noticed that Angel wasn’t particularly surprised by any of the information Lawson had managed to get from the German. “You knew about this?”

 

“It was part of the mission.”

 

“Oh I get it, you’re playing both sides against the other. I respect that but if the Yanks are after this stuff too then I’m eatin’ the lot of them.”

 

“No, you aren’t!” Angel shoved Spike away from the human crew. “We need them, Spike. I’m not getting trapped at the bottom of the sea.”

 

“And I’m not getting experimented on by his government,” Spike gestured at Lawson.

 

“We wouldn’t do that. You don’t win a war by doing whatever it takes. You win by doing what’s right.” Lawson looked deeply affronted at the very idea.

 

“Let me know how that works out for you,” Spike snarled.

 

Buffy was reeling! So that’s where the scientists who put the chip in Spike got their ideas. From Nazi’s! Since when did the US Government start using Nazi plans?

 

Angel grabbed the papers, “None of this matters. Your people are getting this ship and their men that are still alive and that’s all.” He thrust the papers at Spike, “Torch it.”

 

“Oh damn skippy!” He pulled out a lighter and lit the reports to the horror of the German officer. Spike began to sing “God Save the King” slightly off-key in glorious defiance as the papers burned.

 

A muffled explosion could be heard near the sub as depth charges went off nearby.

 

“How many Hodge?” Lawson shouted as everyone rushed to their stations trying to evade the attack.

 

“I’m picking up at least 3… no, 4 Destroyers.”

 

Lawson began to bark out a series of urgent orders and the crew complied without hesitation. This was life or death for all of them.

 

Finally one of the explosions rocked the ship throwing everyone off balance and sending sparks flying from circuits as the overhead lights dimmed. “Report!”

 

“Propulsion motor’s down, we’re dead in the water.”

 

Angel was panicked, “GO! Get it back up.”

 

Lawson gave him a bleak look, “I don’t know if I can.”

 

“Get sure and fast.”

 

“We’re taking on water,” a terrified crewman shouted.

 

“Secure the other compartments NOW!”

 

“We’re on it,” Angel yelled and grabbed Spike to assist. He muttered, “Never liked the ocean,” as he squeezed a pipe ending that leak.

 

Spike finished his make-shift repairs too and looked around. “Hey, where’s Fritz?”

 

Lawson was fumbling for a screwdriver only to have the now free German officer grab it first and ram it into Lawson’s gut, twisting it to cause the most damage possible.

 

Angel ran to the engine room just a hair too late to prevent Lawson’s mortal wound. “Try not to move.”

 

Lawson, ever the good leader, knew he was done for but also that the mission had to be saved. “We’re dead without propulsion.”

 

“Tell me what to do,” Angel urged him.

 

“I’m the only one… the only one,” Lawson groaned as he coughed up blood. “I’m not gonna let any more die. I can fix it.” He struggled to stand.

 

Angel narrowed his eyes and with a determined look agreed, “I know you can.”

 

Buffy looked on with horror as Angel went into game face and lunged for Lawson’s neck. Just as the loyal sailor was drawing his last breath Angel cut his own wrist and shoved it against Lawson’s open mouth. The sailor looked confused but in short order did finally drink.

 

“My God, Angel! You sired a vampire even with your soul? Why would you do that? The poor guy couldn’t have been the only one able to fix the boat!” 

 

Spike snapped the neck of the German officer who had set the wheels in motion for this turning and looked at Angel, “Your new boy better come around quick before this gets any worse. Hope you know what you’re doin’.”

 

“He’ll get it done.”

 

“In time?” Spike looked around at the disaster and the exhausted and terrified men.

 

Buffy couldn’t take her eyes off the dead, open eyes of the brave young man who had held up against so much only to die this way and be cheated out of a heavenly reward. It wasn’t fair. Surely Angel would dust his creation before the demon could do any harm. Maybe Lawson would find peace in a good place if he didn’t get a chance to do any evil. He hadn’t killed anyone yet, not as a demon anyway and wars don’t count… do they?

 

***

 

Lawson rose fairly quickly much to everyone’s relief and was as good as his word when it came to being able to fix the damage.

 

“We need to surface,” Angel glanced at his Childe. “You did it. Good work.”

 

“Thanks, chief, you too,” Lawson sighed. “We’re surfacing. Is that a good idea with the Jerry’s still trolling for us?”

 

“We’re out of air. The Crew’s not gonna make it if we don’t vent.”

 

“They swore to give their lives for their country, just like me.”

 

Buffy was holding her unneeded breath waiting for Angel to dust the new vampire.

 

“8 hours to sunrise, 20 miles to land. You don’t need to breathe.” He motioned to the hatch that led to the open sea.

 

Lawson looked at Angel looking for some kind of instruction, advice… something.

 

“Sorry for what happened but if I ever see you again I’m gonna have to kill you.”

 

Lawson glared at his maker. “She’s a good boat, take care of her.”

 

Spike snorted, “Bloody brilliant! Turn the poor sod so he can save the ship then make him swim for dry land before Mr. Sunshine scorches him,” he shook his head at Angel. “You’re still a dick. Didn’t even tell the lad how to get on.”

 

Angel nodded then glared back at Spike, “Yeah, I am. You too Spike.” He motioned to the ladder.

 

“That’s it???” Buffy was flabbergasted. “You turn a dying sailor, don’t even feed him then toss him overboard to figure it out on his own? If you aren’t going to teach him how to be a vampire that a Slayer won’t have to stake you should have just done it yourself.” She was beyond disappointed in Angel. Even soulless Spike knew that Angel wasn’t doing right by the vampire he’d created. He turned him, used him, and now was throwing him away like so much trash to survive as best as he could… if he could. That was far more cruel than just putting him out of his misery quickly. Try though she might, Buffy could think of no excuse for it.

 

She remembered being surprised when Angel hadn’t eliminated Spike or Dru when they first came to Sunnydale. She remembered how cagey Angel had been about Dru especially. Judging by how he treated them and how he treated this Lawson guy it wasn’t that he had any affection for them but he also didn’t clean up his mess by ending them either.

 

‘Seems like every person they kill from the time you got the soul is kinda on you, Angel,’ she thought sadly. ‘You could have stopped them for good. This new guy didn’t have to become a monster either. Anybody he kills is your fault!’

 

How could Angel’s soul let him do that? How could he not feel guilty? How could she never have questioned it before? At long last, she felt the remaining chains that tied her to her first love clang to the ground freeing her from bondage. She would never see Angel in the same way again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter End Notes:  
> The actual translation of the insult to Spike is “Your little mind would really not understand our work.”
> 
> How a WWII Submarine works (US Navy training film) https://youtu.be/rCBJ_0vX3AQ
> 
> Life in a submarine https://youtu.be/GZXqZHtL1bk
> 
> Surviving a stab wound https://youtu.be/l5Jx3EsdFGQ
> 
> A favorite song of mine (the earliest recording of it!!!) linked in honor of all those who had loved ones ship off to the unknown maybe not to return. 'Harbor Lights' by Frances Langford (1937) https://youtu.be/70MMFugor4M
> 
> WWII US Navy training film of the type Sam Lawson and the rest of the crew likely viewed. https://youtu.be/nNiq_4CrhGc
> 
>  
> 
> Dedicating this chapter to my father and brother and all the other US Navy personnel of WWII who voluntarily put their lives on the line to serve a higher purpose, to fight tyranny and end madness… or so they hoped.


	30. Chapter 30

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A couple of small bits of dialogue from Why We Fight by Drew Goddard and Steven DeKnight in the beginning of this chapter.

[](https://imgur.com/D0vy0FB)

Chapter 30

 

“So what’s your name, Popeye?” Sam and Spike were laying on the beach panting from exhaustion. There was precious little time to get to shelter before sunrise but they both were too tired to move for a few moments at least.

 

At least there seemed to be places to wait out the sun close at hand not that Angel had known that for certain.

 

“Lawson, Sam Lawson. Guessing my rank doesn’t matter now.”

 

Spike let out an honest to goodness giggle. “Sam,” he sat up and lost himself in laughter. “Priceless is what this is and the big Berk didn’t even snap to the irony.”

 

Sam looked confused.

 

“See... “ Spike tried to explain. “Angelus is the one who sired my sire, makin’ you kind of brother-like to her or so she’d insist. Big on family is my Dru.” Spike waited for Lawson to follow his train of thought then sighed when it seemed to be as lost on him as it had been on Angel.

 

“Makes you my uncle,” he giggled again. “Get it? Uncle Sam.” Spike laughed in glee. “Bloody ironic. Uncle Sam had Angel doin’ their work only to hand off another Uncle Sam to me. Always have to clean up his messes,” Spike sobered up a bit and looked at the morose fledge.

 

Spike reached down and helped pull the new, weak, vampire up and nudged him towards shelter. ‘Have to feed the boy a bit if he’s gonna make it.’

 

Buffy watched as Spike urged the fledgling to drink from him. “Can’t think straight if your demon’s starved,” Spike admonished him. “Need to top off then you can plan and learn.”

 

They both took a short nap to give themselves time to rest and heal a bit.

 

*** 

 

“Well, Uncle Sam, what’s your fancy? I’m still lookin’ for my lady but can do that while I show you what’s what at the same time. Be nice to have some company.”

 

“Haven’t got a fancy. Not anymore.” Sam looked forlorn. “I did have a purpose, a good one. Joined up to fight the Nazi’s and Japs, make the world safe again.”

 

“Good luck on that score, world’s always been a bit mad even in the best of days.”

 

“Funny what goes through a man’s mind when his life’s hanging in the balance. Boys talked about that a lot back on the boat. Always figured It’d be the special moments you freeze in time. Mom singing you to sleep at night... sneaking into the movies with your best friend. The way your girl’s hair shimmers in the sun.” Sam had a faraway look on his face obviously picturing those very things. “But the truth is, the only thing that really goes through your head is… ‘Wow! This really sucks’ and then you’re gone.”

 

Spike nodded, “Yeah. Or realizin’ you might have made a big mistake and it’s too late to take it back. Think about the people gonna miss you, all the ones you’re leavin’ high and dry.”

 

Lawson smiled. “We all need a reason to live, even if we’re already dead. Mom, apple pie, the stars and stripes… that was all good enough for me until…”

 

Spike looked at Sam carefully. “Fine then. Seems you need some project, a purpose. I can ‘preciate that.” Spike pulled out his pack of cigarettes only to find them all water-logged and useless. He tossed them away with a curse and ran his hand through his hair.

 

“Right. No Uncle Sam for Uncle Sam…” Spike brightened and snapped his fingers as he had an idea. “Got it! You need to eat. That’s just the bottom line for a vamp. Can get by on animal in a pinch but it’s like tryin’ to live on treacle or biscuits and the like. Makes you feel full but doesn’t do much for you. Get injured and it takes a lot longer to heal. Human blood’s what you’re made for. Like a proper, healthy diet instead of junk.”

 

Buffy was stunned. All this time she thought Spike’s complaining about the pig's blood they had been giving to him was just him being difficult. It never occurred to her that there might be a reason he wanted human blood beyond taste.

 

“Can’t you just kill me and save all those folks?” Lawson looked miserable.

 

“Angel could have done that but didn’t. Might be a purpose for you yet, lad.”

 

Lawson shook his head in despair.

 

“Look. You got more control already than most fledges, dunno why. Maybe that soul in Angelus is the cause or maybe you’re just a real strong personality. Point is you’ve still got all that human in you, the old man never got a chance to try to torture it out of you. We can work with that.”

 

Lawson looked at Spike in puzzlement. “You seem a bit human too.”

 

“Oh I’m a vamp, demon as any, but yeah… point of pride my not lettin’ the old Bastard turn me into one of his art projects. Had plenty of human left and I made sure to hang onto it if only to spite him.”

 

“So I can keep from being like those other ones?”

 

“Maybe. Demon’ll try to tell you that you haven’t a choice but that’s a load of bollox. Got all the choice you want. Demon makes it so you don’t care as much and takes away the guilt you’d expect from feedin’ on humans. Evolution I suppose, survival. Do you no good if you can’t bring yourself to feed.”

 

Lawson listened attentively. “How can I stay human and still feed even if I don’t feel guilt. I mean, I know right from wrong.”

 

“Sure you do...so do I. Just don’t matter as much, yeah?”

 

“Yeah,” Lawson looked defeated.

 

“Right then. Compromise and give you that purpose you need’s the ticket,” Spike smiled. “Dru’s my purpose. Takin’ care of my lady. She’s been gone a while so I know how it feels without that purpose to guide me, make me get up and try again.” He looked at Sam with sympathy.

 

“How do you feel about the Nazi’s now?”

 

Lawson looked thoughtful. “Still hate all they stand for. Still want to protect everyone back home.”

 

“Can work with that. Nazi’s on the menu then.”

 

“Huh?”

 

“You need to eat. Can still fight your good fight for flag and puppies and what all just different. Kill two birds and all that nonsense.”

 

Lawson still looked confused.

 

“When you first signed up with your Uncle Sam you didn’t know all you were in for… right?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

“But killin’ was part of the package even then, you had to know that at least.”

 

“Sure. Done my share I suppose. Not eyeball to eyeball when you’re in the Navy, not as much as the Army at least. Still pretty sure plenty have died thanks to me.”

 

“So… you keep it up only usin’ your fangs and gettin’ a meal out of it as a bonus.”

 

Lawson thought about what Spike was suggesting and brightened. “You mean I should target the enemy instead of just killing random humans?”

 

“Yeah. I let lots of humans stay off the menu cause I liked ‘em or cause they made things of beauty. You can keep bein’ Uncle Sam and fightin’ your war, only behind the lines.”

 

“Now that sounds like something the human and demon can both agree to.” Lawson smiled.

 

Spike smacked him on the shoulder, “Louis, I think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship.”

 

“Um, my name’s Sam,” Lawson reminded him.

 

Spike laughed. “What? You never saw Casablanca? You do have a lot to learn from me lad.”

 

***

 

“Where do you think we are anyway?” Spike fidgeted wishing he had some dry fags to take the edge off. “You weren’t chained up in the hold. My last point of reference was Madrid and that’s not exactly submarine territory.”

 

“We were in the Bay of Biscay just before we got hit and the Chief made us swim.”

 

“Don’t call that Ponce ‘Chief’… bastard’d like it too much. Sounds like respect.”

 

Sam laughed. “What do I call him then?”

 

“Give it time. I’ve got lots of names for him dependin’ on the mood,” Spike promised. “You’ll have years to think of things that fit.”

 

“Bay of Biscay… so that means we could be anywhere from the south of France to the north of Spain then.”

 

“Most likely closer to France would be my guess.”

 

“If I recollect, Adolph and his crew of rejects own the parts of France that are on the coast in the south along with most of the rest.”

 

“Yeah.” Sam looked around as if expecting to see soldiers to mysteriously appear.

 

“So once Mr. Sunshine goes beddy-bye, what’s say we find us a nice outpost and get dinner? Bound to be some troops around.”

 

Sam felt his fangs elongate in anticipation. “Sounds like a plan.”

 

“So do you think the Nazi’s got your girl?”

 

“Nah, Dru’s crazy but not stupid. Takes a lot to catch her when she’s not wantin’ to be caught. She’s followin’ her demon, followin’ the mayhem. Sooner or later I’ll catch up to her.” Spike grinned. “In the meantime we’ll be in all the right places for you to learn how to be a vampire and still live with yourself. Looks like we’ve both just enlisted.”

 

“Why are you helping me?”

 

Spike shrugged, “Why not? Seem a nice enough bloke. Don’t care much bein’ by myself or hangin’ about with total idiots like those two on the tub. You’ve got a brain. Make for decent company.”

 

“Okay, thanks I guess but why help? I mean the Chi… asshole who sired me didn’t bother.”

 

“Well, that’s him. I’m me. If you’re goin’ to be on the undusty side of things it’s best you know your way around for all our sakes. The Krauts figurin’ out we exist led to the party they had planned for us all. Don’t fancy havin’ my noggin’ opened up and tinkered with. Draw attention and at the least you get peasants with pitchforks and torches. Not good for any of us.” Spike sat up and dusted off his purloined uniform. “You’re not stupid. Not minion material for some reason. That means you can live a long time, best you live in a way that doesn’t screw things up for all of us.”

 

“Training saves lives, like in the military.” Sam nodded.

 

“Somthin’ like that.”

 

“So, got a girl back home Uncle Sam?”

 

Lawson’s face softened as he thought of her. Then the realization that she was lost to him forever hit… Spike saw it the minute it happened.

 

“Sorry. That’s the bad part of the upgrade.” Spike allowed himself a moment to think of all those long in his past. “Tell me about Uncle Sam and his world. Might help facin’ it all at once.”

 

“I didn’t want this. The Chief… whatever you want to call him… needed me to fix the sub and I wanted to complete the mission. Guess I did. Folks will get the death benefit, Jussi will move on in time...Bernie’ll watch over her. Life goes on. If you don’t find your lady...maybe you’ll move on too.”

 

“Dru’s the only one for me.”

 

“What makes her so special. Sounds to me like she left you high and dry.”

 

Spike glared at the lad but had to admit it did look that way to outsiders. “She’s the only one to ever see me...well most of the time anyway. But the only one who saw somethin’ in me worth preservin’. Been together over 60 years. And always surprising and delighting me. Parts of her are mischievous like a little girl with her tea parties and dollies. Other times she’s a right sophisticated lady, brings out the gent in me. Mystifies me with visions other times. Seduces me with things I never dreamed of. Challenges me to be more than I am. She needs me and I need to be needed it seems. That’s MY purpose I guess.”

 

“Are you wanting to make a difference too?”

 

“Nah...but blood’s blood, dinner’s dinner. Might as well get two times the results. Let’s go kill some Krauts, eh? I’m feeling peckish. You can tell me about Uncle Sam while we hunt them down.”

 

“I’m from Duluth, Minnesota, that’s on Lake Superior. Maybe that’s what led me to the Navy. I’ve always been around the water. As a kid, I used to watch the freighters carrying ore and for a long time thought that would be the life for me! I’d hang out at the docks and dream of different places. Seemed like an adventurous life.”

 

“So you always planned for life on a ship of some kind then,” Spike smiled and remembered his human life and how shipping had financed his whole world. The profits for the family firm were still coming in and tended by distant relatives with portions going to the accounts he had set up to fund his immortal life. They had continued his forward thinking even after his uncle had taken over.

 

“That was till I met Jussi,” Sam ducked his head. “God she’s beautiful! All blonde hair and green eyes and a laugh that makes you think of Angels singing.”

 

“Got it bad there,” Spike chuckled.

 

“She didn’t want some fella who was always gone or who might drown in a November gale.” Lawson swallowed. “She’s going to be devastated when I’m reported killed in action.”

 

“What did she want?”

 

“I decided to go to Duluth State Teachers College … ‘Go Bulldogs’...” he grinned. “Was planning to teach High School English one day. Then the war came and I enlisted. We take defending our country seriously in Duluth. I remember my dad telling me about this guy who didn’t want to serve back in ‘18 in the last war. They lynched him.” 

 

“That’ll fill the ranks,” Spike chuckled. “Die here or die there.”

 

“So your girl… Jessie?”

 

“Jussi. Jussi Blomqvist. Met her at the restaurant at the Hotel Holland. Bet you didn’t know that’s the birthplace of pie-ala-mode,” Sam grinned.

 

“SHUT THE DOOR!” Buffy was reeling. “Jussi Blomqvist is my Gran’s name and she was from Duluth. Back up sailor, that’s my grandma you may be talking about there.” 

 

“My best buddy will make sure she’s okay. Bernie’s a great guy. He was 4F, hated that. Some kind of farming accident when he was still a country boy. He plans to move back to Illinois and take over his dad’s farm and can’t figure out why he’s healthy enough to work a farm but not protect and serve.”

 

Buffy was stunned. Her grandmother had married a farmer named Bernie Erikson and they lived in Illinois where her mom and her aunts were born! This guy could have been her grandfather if he’d lived.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter End Notes:  
> 4F status for the military http://directionsindentistry.net/4f-unfit-for-service-because-of-teeth/
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Selective_Service_System#Classifications
> 
> In 1918 Finnish man Olli Kinkkkonen was lynched because he didn’t want to serve in WWI https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lynching_of_Olli_Kinkkonen
> 
> Birthplace of Pie a la mode https://www.perfectduluthday.com/2017/10/24/duluth-birthplace-pie-la-mode/
> 
> Hotel Holland https://www.perfectduluthday.com/2016/09/04/lobby-hotel-holland/
> 
> Duluth State Teachers College (Bulldogs) (now in 2019 U. of Minn Duluth) http://d.umn.edu/about-umd/campus-history
> 
> France under Hitler https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vichy_France 
> 
> French surrender to Hitler https://youtu.be/ADUcjRc5p3k
> 
> Danny Kaye entertaining the troops in WWII with Melody for 4F https://youtu.be/wP7OyJeeKhU
> 
> Duluth as it once was https://youtu.be/1pWGkZOjYE


	31. Chapter 31

[](https://imgur.com/WiU36nr)

Chapter 31

 

Giles had patiently answered every one of Tara’s questions. The shy girl had a surprisingly good grasp of the supernatural world but not the secret organizations that were tasked with policing it.

 

Tara’s head swam with all the information imparted to her by the serious British gentleman. She had always known about demons and magic, of course, but never knew about just how varied the world actually was. How marvelous and kind of scary! ‘Wish my mom could have lived longer and explained things. I’m sure she knew so much more than the little bit she told me.’

 

“So B-b-b-uffy is this Slayer?”

 

“Indeed. One of the best.”

 

“And the vampire?”

 

“One of the worst,” Xander piped up.

 

“In all fairness, not of late,” Giles conceded. “He is here because there has been something done to him that prohibits his natural inclinations. Perhaps you’ve seen some unusual activities at night involving soldier types wearing balaclavas that seem to have turned up especially on your campus?”

 

Tara remembered seeing four guys a few nights before. They were chasing a young guy from her art history class. She had assumed it was a fraternity pledge type of thing. “So they’re not just typical college idiots?”

 

Giles smiled warmly. “It seems not. That is if Spike has been truthful.” He gave a worried glance to the pair still trapped in the bubble and once more rued the day he’d offered sanctuary to the pest.

 

“I believe him,” Anya nodded. “He’s a Master Vampire and not likely to check his pride at the door of his biggest enemy unless he’s got no choice at all. Anything that scares the Big Bad must be pretty scary if you ask me.”

 

“Okay. I’ve heard all you and Ahn have said about that doo-hickey but it’s been a whole day now and I don’t get why they aren’t free so that Buffy can just ram a stake in dead-boy, Jr.’s heart and get it all over with. We already have all the 411 he has to offer so we don’t need to keep him around,” Xander sneered at the immobile Spike.

 

“We don’t kill harmless creatures,” Giles reminded the lad for the millionth time.

 

Tara was glad to hear that. Maybe this group wouldn’t turn on her once her true demonic nature presented. She had already decided she wanted to know more about all of them and would hate having to hide or avoid them. It was nice to be around people who had knowledge of things beyond the mortal world.

 

She looked at Xander who was scowling at the thought that Spike might continue to be a thorn in their side in spite of this wonderful turn of events. ‘Maybe not so much this guy. He reminds me of Donnie a lot,’ she gave a nervous glance in his direction. Still, he was dating a girl who claimed to have once been a demon.

 

“I just can’t believe Buffy is having to see Spike’s whole sordid life! “ Xander shuddered in revulsion.

 

“And Spike is seeing Buffy’s too remember,” Anya patted her boyfriends arm in sympathy. “It might take a while since Spike’s life is so much longer than Buffy’s. We might as well relax and wait because the eye won’t pass until they get up to current.”

 

Xander rubbed his hands in glee. “Gonna be SO worth it when this happy spell ends. After seeing blood breath in all his evil glory Buffy will finally stop feeling sorry for him and fit him in the Hoover!” Even Giles looked at him in dismay. His vehemence seemed far out of proportion to any first-hand grievance with the vampire in question.

 

Xander noted the looks. “I mean, come on…” He pointed to Giles with self-righteous fury. “You said that even as a human Spike was a worthless thug. Pretty sure Buffy could add pages to what the Council already knows there alone.”

 

“The Council knows a lot of things they made up over the years,” Anya replied indignantly. “One of those books over there says I was born in Poland in the 1400s, another says I was a Hellgod, one of the Old Ones and they both claim to have proof!”

 

“You’re in one of their books?” Tara looked confused. The knowledgable and slightly odd girl seemed perfectly human to her.

 

“I was a vengeance demon, patroness of scorned women, for a thousand plus years until my power source was taken and destroyed. Now I’m back to being a weak human being with no power at all and precious little respect. It’s really depressing and more than a little embarrassing too.”

 

“But you started out a human?” Tara struggled to understand. She knew little about the process other than the vague warnings her father had given to her.

 

Anya nodded enthusiastically. No one had ever asked about her or her life and when she tried to reminisce she was told to be quiet, no one wanted to hear. “I was born in Sjornjost in 860… that’s in Sweden now. Typical Viking village and life. I cursed my cheating boyfriend and attracted the attention of D’Hoffryn. He’s the head of the Vengeances Demons. He was impressed by my skills and passion. The rest is history. A LOT of history. I could tell you so many stories!”

 

“Oh, please, no, Ahn! We really don’t want to hear about all the guys you cursed.” Xander shuddered. “Besides you’re human now and not a demon.”

 

Tara’s brow furrowed. “So you were a human but became a demon but you’re now a human again? Can all demons do that?”

 

“Some,” Anya nodded. “Though only a few species of demons, those that started out as humans like werewolves or vampires and usually it takes something like Mohra blood.”

 

Giles looked gobsmacked. Once all of this nonsense was over he really needed to have a long chat with Anya.

 

“What about those born demon? Can they become human?”

 

“Why would they want to?”

 

Tara rather preferred being a human actually and she didn’t know what sort of demon she was going to transform into once she hit that magic age. Maybe these people could help her find some of that Mohra blood and she could keep from changing at all!

 

No one had noticed Willow slip back into the apartment. She had the notes from her attempted spell in her pocket. There was no way she was going to volunteer any information about that but if things got too desperate she had them available.

 

Xander looked away from his girlfriend and her troubling opinions and spotted her. “Hey, Will, back me up here…”

 

Willow glared at him as every eye turned her way. ‘So much for discretion.’

 

“Remind everybody about the Golden Rule. See demon, kill demon. Nothing about coddling them.”

 

“I hardly think chaining Spike up and not feeding him properly when he came to us for help would be considered coddling,” Anya sounded annoyed with Xander and his one-note song about demons.

 

“He’s not chained up now,” Xander blustered. “And he was all free range when you did that Will Be Done spell that led to much badness.”

 

“Will Be Done spell?” Tara looked at Willow aghast. “You did a compulsion spell on a vampire?”

 

“On all of us,” Anya huffed. “Every demon in town was chasing Xander. Giles was blind as a bat… literally this time. And Buffy and Spike got engaged. The gods only know what you hoped to accomplish with any of that!” She threw a disgusted look at Willow.

 

“Ahn,” the patronizing tone of Xander’s voice rang loud and clear. “Willow apologized already and even baked her best ‘I’m sorry’ cookies. Let it go.”

 

“Why should I let it go? We could have all been killed. It was evil enough to even attract the attention of D’Hoffryn.. Although I don’t think you’d be a good vengeance demon. You don’t have the discipline and you’d never listen to Hoffy.”

 

Willow turned bright red. This was exactly why she had tried to fix the situation using that dumb idol in the first place. Some people were too fixated on her one little mishap to let it go.

 

“Oh, Willow! I had no idea you were so trained in magic to try a spell like that! It calls on such dark energies, I don’t think I’d ever try it for any reason. Did your tutor explain how dangerous it was?

 

“I taught myself,” Willow visibly preened. “No one around here with the power I have who could teach me half of what I’ve already learned on my own.”

 

Tara looked more sick than impressed.

 

“It was a momentary slip-up. I was in so much pain and I had no idea it would work like it did, or work at all really. All I wanted was for Oz to decide to stay and work through his issues here. It was for the best,” She missed the look of horror on Tara’s face and the disgust on Giles’.

 

“He has friends here and support. Out there he’s a danger to himself and everyone else. I had to do something.” 

 

“Oz is a werewolf and was Willow’s boyfriend,” Xander tried to explain. “He left town to try to get the wolf under control so he wouldn’t have to get locked up every month or risk killing someone.”

 

“Willow you don’t have the right to take away the free will of others! That’s what that spell does… it’s in the name itself! It’s putting your will in place of someone else's and that’s never right. Even if someone is making a mistake, it’s theirs to make.” Tara was so upset that she hadn’t even stuttered.

 

“It’s wrong. That’s why it’s dark energy that powers it. Your teacher should have told you to avoid that. Didn’t you even consider the Rule of Three?”

 

“What’s that?”

 

Tara blinked then looked from Anya to Giles in amazement. “The Rule of Three is that whatever energy a practitioner puts out into the world...positive or negative, is returned to the practitioner three times. It’s basic Wicca, I mean VERY basic. Whatever you send out comes back three fold. If you dabble in dark magic it can be catastrophic. Any Wiccan who falls into that usually destroys themselves and everyone around them eventually.” Tara gasped. “Oh, Willow, you have to stop!”

 

“I have stopped. See me all full-stop girl.” Willow threw up her hands. “No more dark energy for this Witch.”

 

“Please tell me you did a cleanse and got rid of the dark energy called and recentered your magic.”

 

“Huh?”

 

“I had no idea what your spell was or the reason you cast it, Willow,” Giles muttered. “I should have asked. Tara is right. We need to see about freeing you from the forces you’ve embraced.”

 

“Should have done that a long time ago,” Anya pointed out. “From what I heard about the first big spell you cast you dove into the dark from the start. Wasn’t it the curse on Angel?”

 

“What?!” Tara actually shouted. “Your first spell was a curse?”

 

“It was a good curse. I mean it was for a good thing! It put his soul back,” Willow shot back defiantly.

 

“You did a curse that involved a soul and you survived,” Tara’s eyes were wide and she slid down on the chair in shock.

 

Willow preened proudly again. “See! Powerful. Who’s gonna be able to teach me what I can already do?”

 

“It’s not about what you CAN do, it’s about what you SHOULD do and how, when and why you do it.” Tara looked at the only adult in the room (exempting Anya). “Didn’t you say you're with a big important group that handles stuff like magic?”

 

“The Council of Watchers, yes.”

 

“Why didn’t you get a good instructor for Willow when she showed such promise and power?”

 

“Now there’s a great question,” Anya snarked.

 

“I… well, to be honest, it didn’t occur to me. Buffy is my responsibility.”

 

“But isn’t Willow working with your Slayer, isn’t what she does important to the cause too? Doesn’t that make her powers your responsibility?”

 

Giles shifted uncomfortably. “Well, I suppose so. Frankly, I had no idea that Willow’s powers had progressed that far.”

 

Tara blinked in astonishment and from the look she gave him, her estimation of him had dropped dramatically. “Even with those two spells alone, someone should have said something.”

 

Xander looked befuddled. Why was the new girl picking on Willow? ‘Must be jealous,’ he decided. ‘Probably a witch-come-lately who wishes she had half the power of my bestie.’

 

“Maybe Willow could learn more stuff with training but our little Sabrina is pretty awesome already,” Xander put an arm around Willow’s shoulders and gave her a hug.

 

“Awesome as in scary,” Anya muttered. Only Giles seemed to hear her.

 

“So fair witch of mine, any idea on how to get this bit of magic moving faster so we can get to the staking portion of the program?” Xander was far too eager for a dusty conclusion for most of his audience’s comfort.

 

“Eleos might manage to turn them into… well not allies or friends but at least not enemies. It can work that way. That WAS the purpose after all,” reminded Anya.

 

“My spell had nothing in it about friends,” Willow whispered.

 

“And just what spell would that be?” Giles narrowed his eyes and demanded. “What did you do, Willow?”

 

Willow realized she had spoken aloud and gulped. “Nothing really, nothing! I bought the idol and kinda thought maybe the goddess might help everyone move on from being all bad moody over the Will Be Done spell oopsie. I never said anything to cause this,” she gestured towards Buffy and Spike caught in the eye.

 

“That does make sense,” Anya nodded. “Willow tampered with forces she didn’t know anything about and everyone else has to pay for it. Show of hands everyone surprised.”

 

“No way! I didn’t say anything about Buffy or Spike or any dumb eye… or… or… anybody playing ‘Frozen Statues’ in the middle of Giles’ apartment.”

 

“What exactly DID you say,” Giles barely contained his anger. “Where did you get the spell you used since you appear to have known next to nothing about the idol or its purpose?”

 

Willow huffed, “Well, the magic store owner didn’t exactly give me an instruction manual. He wasn’t even sure if it was the real deal. He got it at a flea market.”

 

“And?”

 

“So I used my brain! I picked out the right incense for compassion and forgiveness and I wrote my own spell.”

 

Giles collapsed into his own chair. “What were you thinking?” Her casual disregard for the power she had been wielding about was appalling. “Have you learned nothing from your last venture with magic?”

 

“I was thinking we could all get past one little mistake and trust each other again.” She glared at Anya. “I’ve seen all the side-eye and attitude.”

 

She pulled out her notes and reluctantly handed them to Giles. “I just wanted to be understood.”

 

“I believe we are beginning to do just that,” Giles sighed sadly.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Three fold law: https://www.wicca-spirituality.com/three-fold-law.html


	32. Chapter 32

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [](https://imgur.com/Lbr1hcZ)

Chapter 32

 

The bodies were piled at the side of the road, a sight not uncommon in Europe for the past few years. It was hard to tell anymore when it was the result of demons or the humans wearing the face of evil responsible for the carnage either. This time it was the work of Buffy’s two vampires. “So Captain,” Sam grinned at Spike. “Think we got all the Gestapo from this burg?”

 

“Looks like.” Spike surveyed the scene in glee. “Makin’ it safe for kiddies and puppies again. If there’s any left that is.” He looked at the farming village that was nearly devoid of people. “That’s the trouble with war, Uncle Sam, sell everyone on the idea of protectin’ your own and then not many of your own left in the end.”

 

Sam nodded and wiped the blood from his mouth and jaw. “No glory in it that’s for sure.”

 

“Usually no need either,” Spike added. “Once in a while someone gets some grand idea, some divin’ in the deep evil and it has to be done.” He sat and looked somberly at his protege. “Lived a long time and seen it more than once. Seen lots of senseless ones too. My old man fought in one of those.”

 

“Which one?” They had never discussed just how old Spike was during their couple of years roaming throughout Europe.

 

“Anyone even remember what the Crimean War was about anymore?”

 

Sam shrugged and looked clueless.

 

“Not even sure where Crimea is.”

 

“Exactly. But it took him away from me and sis and mum. Was never the same when he got back either. Like part of him died out there and we got the ghost for a while until his body joined the rest.”

 

“And this war? How do you see it?”

 

“This one coulda been stopped long before it happened. Hitler and his lot never hid their real agenda. Everyone was so tired from the first big war they were willin’ to turn their eyes away and hope for the best till it was too late.” Spike lit a smoke and looked heavenward. “Humans are stupid that way I guess. Never think the worst can happen. Always belivin’ the bad stuff will happen to someone else.” He grinned at Sam. “Guess that works in our favor, yeah?”

 

Sam didn’t answer that last part. “So you think someone should have shut him down right away?”

 

“Wouldda saved a whole lot of lives, wouldn’t it?”

 

The two sat in silence surrounded by dead Nazi’s. It was a scene that Buffy had witnessed more than once in the years since the submarine had brought the two vampires together. ‘Unsung comrades in arms,’ Buffy snorted.

 

The two had cut a swath behind enemy lines killing Nazi’s and collaborators. They had stoked fear in the hearts and minds of many who came to believe that hell itself had joined the war effort when confronted with game faces and pointed teeth. Of course, they weren’t the only demons to be taking part in this war. The carnage begged for it and all species were impacted.

 

They’d looked for Dru along the way and Spike was beginning to get maudlin at the thought that this time she might be gone for good.

 

“Heard one of these,” Spike kicked a Nazi corpse, “Going on about a bunch of Dachau prisoners they’re marchin’ south towards Austria. Himler said he didn’t want any prisoners to fall into the enemy’s hands alive. Guess he’s not so proud of his handiwork now that he’s facin’ the music. Anyway, rumor has it there’s more than a few thousand of the poor buggers.” Spike tossed his fag down and crushed it on one of the dead Gestapo. “Feel like a bit of mayhem? Mess up ole’ Himmler’s doilies and such?”

 

Sam grinned demonically, “Lead on Captain.”

 

Buffy had to laugh as she remembered Spike and his fake apology for messing up her doilies once upon a time. ‘He really could have easily killed my mom and then me that day. I really had no idea what a good fighter he was then. Thought it was my skills or mom’s axe that saved us but really it was just that he obviously didn’t want me dead even if he swore that’s why he was there. Weird vampire,’ she smiled fondly at him. Realizations like this no longer took her by surprise. She’d seen him both in and out of his armor and had a pretty good idea of how he ticked by now.

 

She’d seen him angered at some of the horrors done to the people and demons around them. Seen him disgusted at the waste and the damage to the world that he still loved.

 

The camps had been the worst. Buffy had seen plenty in her life both before this mystical journey and in the time since her calling. She had never thought to see anything like what they saw at the various Nazi Concentration Camps, however. It was a scene right out of hell. Worse than anything demonic she’d ever encountered and yet it was all human in origin and operation. Nothing in her textbooks at school remotely conveyed the horror and the evil she had now seen first hand.

 

The Allies had confidence that the war was ending from early in 1945 when the big three, Stalin, FDR and Churchill met at Yalta to hammer out post-war plans. Spike and Lawson had wandered through the areas still under Axis control feeding on the panicked actions of the Fascists as they went through the death throes of their cause and began to try to cover up their war crimes.

 

Resistance units were marking victories and welcomed their demonic comrades. It was truly a case of, “the enemy of my enemy is my friend,” and selective blindness to the odd third eye, scaly skin, or tentacle or two that came along with the help from the demons who shared in their cause.

 

It spoke volumes about how vile and evil the Nazi’s had been that even demons had celebrated the fall of the European Axis powers. Germany and Italy were under occupation by the Allies while Japan alone continued fighting the war.

 

“Old Joe Stalin is going to be a handful,” Lawson pointed out as they tracked the Nazis marching the already tormented prisoners. Himmler’s boys were leaving a trail of bodies along their route, their true plan actually. The former inmates of the Camps stood as testimony to the inhumanity that had taken hold of Europe under Hitler and Mussolini.

 

“Got that right,” Spike agreed. “That bleedin’ give-away at Yalta’ll just embolden him too. Poland has always been a poker chip in the different European wars. Amazin’ it still exists!” Spike stopped to examine some branches that showed movement of a large number of people as their prey had changed directions. “Nothin’ good ever came out of Crimea in my opinion. This latest divvying up of the Continent will be just another disaster for the regulars.”

 

Rumor had it that the Soviet troops had liberated Berlin and raised the Hammer and Sickle over the Government buildings. They announced that Hitler and his bride, Eva Braun, had committed suicide in the bunker where their makeshift wedding had taken place. Hitler’s appointed successor, Admiral Donitz, had been arrested and was going to be charged with war crimes.

 

“Sure! Adolph took poison and there’s no bodies bein’ paraded around to prove it. Not that old Joe would lie ‘bout that!” Spike was ever cynical. “Don’t think I’ll be just takin’ the word of Stalin. That tosser is as bad as Adolph and just as power mad. Wouldn’t be surprised if he doesn’t wind up killin’ even more people than all the Axis by the time he’s worm food.”

 

Stalin had started staking claim to vast areas from the time they raised the flag of the USSR in Berlin.

 

“Been thinkin’ about that Captain,” Sam cleared his throat. “With this war pretty much over, I’ll be lookin’ for a new purpose. You helped me find my way before… you got any ideas?”

 

Spike shrugged. “Don’t have the Red, White, and Blue Shield like you, Captain America. I’m just a vamp enjoyin’ the pickings.”

 

Buffy snorted. “Yeah, Big Bad!” She’d seen enough to know that Spike had taken a liking to being treated like a hero those times they had helped the different Resistance groups. He’d been downright tender to the kids they’d rescued from the boxcars and grateful farmers freed from having to look over their shoulders almost put him to the blush. Spike talked a good game about not caring but a grey, if not white, hat didn’t look out of place on him if you asked Buffy.

 

“What’s your fancy? It’s your war.”

 

“Well, I could head to the Pacific theater. Hirohito’s generals aren’t seeing the handwriting on the wall, digging in their heels. They’re as monstrous as Hitler from all I heard before being turned. Gonna be a while before they give it up.”

 

Spike squirmed a bit. He really didn’t think Dru would follow the blood to the Orient. She hadn’t been much for Asia back in the day. She was still somewhere in Europe if he had to make an educated guess and he was still looking for her. Still, he didn’t want to part company with his companion. He enjoyed the lad and their exploits.

 

“Heard talk from the GI’s that they’re expecting more action against the Communists. Even spirited some of Hitler’s best scientists over to the States to work on rockets and weapons to use in case it comes to that.”

 

Lawson looked horrified. “Why would they let any of these monsters walk free much less take them right into our country?”

 

“People do odd things, make bad compromises, when they think they need an ace in the hole. Von Braun and his team developed that V-2 rocket that played hell with Old Blighty. Smart man, even if he’s a card carryin'’ Nazi. Whole bloody team’s been given the red carpet to your good old U.S. of A.”

 

Lawson was disgusted. “Maybe they’ll make them pay after they get information out of them.”

 

Spike scoffed. He’d seen too much of human nature to hold much hope for justice in the world. “You keep tellin’ yourself that lad if it helps you sleep. Most politicians have the morals of a street whore or worse. Would sell their own mum for a Hershey Bar if they had a yen for one. Not many even regular folk as high minded as you are.”

 

Buffy had to agree. Vampire or human, Sam Lawson had a strong sense of right and wrong. She had no idea why that was so but it had become obvious over the years they had traveled together. ‘Giles would have a field day trying to figure him out!’

 

The two vampires had been silent thinking about their possible path in the near future. Spike knew that if the Yank decided to head to Japan they would be parting ways.

 

Sam looked around at the devastation around him, the physical signs of human suffering in the bodies of the Dachau prisoners along the route of the march left to rot. So much injustice in the world! Not hard to find it everywhere really, no need to go long distances either.

 

“Russia it is then.”

 

Spike brightened. “More likely to see Dru along the way if we pick that battle too.”

 

Lawson gave him a lopsided grin. Really, the older vampire was such a hopeless romantic. Sam hoped his lady was worth all the trouble Spike had gone to in order to find her. “Ever want to give up on her? It’s been a few years after all. Maybe if you stop chasing her she’ll come to you.”

 

“I don’t walk away.” Spike’s jaw tightened. “She made me. Took a lump of nothing and…” He choked back tears. “I can’t be nothing again.”

 

Buffy and Lawson watched as Spike put his mask of indifference back on his face. “‘Sides… lady needs me to keep her out of trouble, yeah? She’s a wild one always gettin’ herself in fixes.”

 

“Sounds like.”

 

“So off to the cold north then? We can help take out the idiots that didn’t get the word that they lost, liberate a few unfortunates and figure out this whole next move thing as we go.” Spike slapped Lawson on the back as they headed towards the place they’d spotted signs of the death march.

 

***

 

Buffy watched her two vampires as they finished off the rest of the Nazi soldiers they had culled from the guards. Some of the prisoners had taken advantage of the carnage to make a run for freedom. Buffy hoped they’d survive.

 

Gunshots came from further up the line and she worried that their attack had been noticed but it was just more of the same brutality that had walked with the group from the start. Prisoners too weak to continue walking were killed where they stood and left for the wild animals to dispose of. When they had left Dachau there had been around 6,000 prisoners alive but hundreds had died either from the conditions, their own terrible health, or a bullet from one of the guards moving them along. Their trail was littered with corpses.

 

Buffy thought about Lawson’s purpose. About how Spike had taught him about being a vampire but not becoming a monster and that there was a difference. She remembered how different Spike’s own training from Angelus had been. She also remembered that no matter how hard Angelus had tried to break William, to remake him in his own image, the humanity clung stubbornly. Now here was Sam Lawson who also hung on to his values, his better nature. ‘I’m beginning to think that Angelus is the one who is the odd one out. Yeah, Dru’s pretty much a monster but she has her moments and Angelus drove her crazy to start with. Maybe she’d be like these two if Angelus hadn’t tormented her, broken her.’

 

It made her sad that Spike seemed to think he needed Dru to be someone! In her opinion Spike without Dru was a pretty decent guy in spite of his diet. It broke her heart to see how insecure he was about his own worth after all these years. The demons that had haunted William long before he had a literal demon were still there, still whispering lies. Lots of William was still there.

 

Spike’s tenderness and care for Dru was another thing that marked him as different from what she had been taught was possible with a vampire. He was a caregiver, it showed in all he did for his Sire. In fact, he was too eager to please her!

 

“He was pretty human all along but when Dru wanted him to be the beast he did it without question. All this time away from Dru he’s been his own man. No massacres of innocents, no reveling in evil.”

 

Buffy wished they would never find Dru even as she knew it was a useless wish. ‘I wonder what Spike would have been like if he hadn’t hooked back up with her? If he’d stayed with Lawson and the nicer demons he likes to hang out with? Wonder what kind of guy he would have been when we first met? ‘ Then again, maybe she never would have met him at all. His whole reason for being in Sunnydale had been to find a cure for Dru after all.

 

The selfish part of her rejoiced that it had played out the way it had after all. Spike might have been lured to the dark side with Dru there to demand and encourage it but at least it led him to her town, her life.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N
> 
> Do not eat while watching and not for the faint of heart. Actual footage of the Camps on liberation. https://youtu.be/xy_xWKJubuY
> 
> Some survivors of one of the death marches https://youtu.be/80KtTLEf5wU
> 
> The march Spike speaks of intended to cover up the horrors of Dachau is covered in this article https://www.nytimes.com/2007/03/06/world/europe/06iht-death.4817410.html
> 
> It wasn’t the only death march at the wars end https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Death_marches_(Holocaust)
> 
> And this chilling bit https://furtherglory.wordpress.com/2011/05/01/new-book-tells-about-german-civilians-killing-prisoners-who-were-on-the-death-march-out-of-dachau/
> 
> End of WWII (Europe) https://youtu.be/U6RFAUmYU5o Kahn academy vid
> 
> Soviets march into Berlin https://youtu.be/mJBLlBvI3bw
> 
> End of WWII https://youtu.be/ACxn6RY1Xq0
> 
> Wernher Von Braun https://www.nasa.gov/centers/marshall/history/vonbraun/bio.html
> 
> Wernher Von Braun (the “Father” of NASA)and his team were brought to the USA to start work on our rockets and nuclear plan. He and his team were Nazi’s (yup, members of the party) who had designed and developed the rockets that had reigned terror over Britain and other allies fighting against Hitler. https://youtu.be/apBaz6HcJAc
> 
> How they rationalized bringing Nazi’s to the USA and not charging them as war criminals https://youtu.be/peD_JP59JyM
> 
> Hitler survival conspiracy theories https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Conspiracy_theories_about_Adolf_Hitler%27s_death
> 
> Stalin’s objectives post-Yalta conference https://dailyhistory.org/What_were_Joseph_Stalin%27s_goals_as_World_War_Two_ended%3F
> 
> https://youtu.be/1onjIjDD_1M Newsreel of Yalta
> 
> Poland’s long history with conquest and conquering https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Territorial_evolution_of_Poland


	33. Chapter 33

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [](https://imgur.com/c8qKzbC)

Chapter 33

 

Buffy looked around in a continual state of dismay. Everywhere was death, destruction, and desperation.

 

Beautiful rivers and countryside littered with the dead, even the crops in the fields withered from lack of care and manpower.

 

So many who had survived seemed more like the walking dead than any Zombie or Vampire that Buffy had ever seen. They lived, but that was about all.

 

She knew things got better and life bloomed again but seeing it now she wondered how.

 

“We toss out the word ‘apocalypse’ like it’s a joke; just another regular event. The ones I’ve stopped were real and not an exaggeration… but this!... This? This is what an apocalypse looks like. Demons aren’t the only ones who unleash hell on earth.”

 

“God! I’m old! Or at least grown up,” she lamented. Then again, she’d lived over a hundred and fifty years by now if she counted her regular timeline. It was time she showed some maturity she supposed, a bit of wisdom from all she’d witnessed.

 

She stopped to think about Anya and the number of years that she’d lived both as a human and a demon. “I don’t know why we treat her like some air-headed teenager. There’s so much she must know!” Buffy vowed to never take such a valuable resource for granted again.

 

She thought about the spiel Merrick and Giles had given her. The Council party line about being the One Girl in every generation who is meant to stand against evil. “Bull hockey! I’m not supposed to fight all evil, that’s crazy and can’t be done. Evil is all around and not just in vampires and demons. Heck, even some of the stuff humans call evil about them isn’t really evil. A vampire needs blood to survive. Maybe killing innocents is evil but not the need to drink blood by itself.” She’d seen her vampires mostly not kill when feeding so it could be done.

 

“I’m supposed to stop the killing of innocents by vampires and demons. Stop the demon created apocalypses. It’s not even my job to police the human evil and it’s a good thing too because there’s too much of it. I just need to stop demon caused messes and keep vampires and demons from preying on the innocent when I catch them at it. It’s not my job to ‘stop evil’, it can’t be done.”

 

Buffy felt a weight lift from her shoulders as she had that epiphany. All these years she had carried the weight of the world… literally, on her shoulders. Felt it suck her into the ground. Felt guilty for anyone she hadn’t been able to save. Even took full blame for the evil done by Angelus when he slipped his curse. “I’ve seen from Spike and Sam that Angelus didn’t have to be that way. He chose to be that way, reveled in it. That’s on him, not me.”

 

She vowed to take up the fight again when she got back to normal but not in the same way. Not with the narrow and flawed view of the Council no matter how well-meaning they might have been. She’d embrace the resources she had and not dismiss the value of alliances with demons who were willing to abide by civilized rules.

 

The Council were idiots. “Like that old guy in the singing movie who wore a pan on his head and tilted at windmills… Don Keyhole or something… the guy with the impossible dreams. Well, they were impossible. Stab all kinds of windmills and it doesn’t stop any dragons. You do the best you can with what you have and pass it on to the next warrior.”

 

***

 

The German soldier trembled, eyes wide with fear. “Nein! I was no Nazi. They conscripted me. Forced me from my home and sent me to the Eastern Front. I was just a soldier.”

 

Spike and Sam had no way to determine the full truth of the man’s story but knew enough that it was a true one for many a luckless German. Regular soldiers rarely were true believers. They either were forced to fight or took up arms to literally protect their homes and families with no regard for the politics or policies of the rulers.

 

“Take yourself home then and mind you don’t go startin’ up yet another mess,” Spike growled, his eyes flashing amber.

 

“Danke, Danke,” the man backed away hurriedly.

 

“Poor bugger’ll likely find rubble back home. If he wasn’t a true believer, that’s more punishment than he prob’ly deserves.”

 

“Hard knowing what justice is, Captain,” Sam sighed. “Can’t fault someone forced into the army or one who just was protecting their home during war. Not easy to tell why folks do what they do in those cases or what’s just,” he shrugged.

 

“I’m just a vampire, not God,” he laughed ruefully. “Got my sense of right and wrong but can’t see into someone’s heart or soul. Guess we just execute the obvious ones, decide from their actions and hope for the best.”

 

Buffy nodded. Sam had come to pretty much the same conclusion that she had it seemed.

 

“Yeah. Regular army could be for any reason. Joinin’ the SS though or guardin’ the camps, the Gestapo… those were choices,” Spike agreed. “Enough of them to keep us fed too.”

 

***

 

There were times when trekking through the war-scarred lands of Europe seemed even more dangerous for the two vampires than when the actual war raged around them.

 

Former combatants trying to either just get home or find a way to flee prosecution were in every dark and hidden place that a vamp might need for their own protection. Refugees swarmed in a daze looking for safe places to rest a bit before continuing their journey through the horror-scape still filled with uncertainty.

 

The gleeful liberation armies were sometimes no better. Some extracted their own brand of justice without counting the cost.

 

Women who had the misfortune of following their hearts having given them to a German or Italian soldier found themselves dragged to the public squares, whipped and shamed. Their hair was shaved off as their former neighbors spit upon them.

 

For the two vampires it meant having to hide from any larger group not knowing the sort of “welcome” they might encounter. Most demons, even those who had fought alongside the resistance, had fled or gone to ground.

 

“You speak any Russian?” Spike had discovered that Lawson had nearly as many hidden talents as he did himself.

 

“Not as such. Maybe a word or two. Know a bit of Swedish. Got it from my grandmother. She immigrated from Orebro when she was just a kid. She remembered her native tongue though, especially the naughty words,” he grinned and gave a small laugh. “She was a real pistol even as an old lady. The last name was Larsson there but the mook at Ellis Island spelled it wrong,” he shrugged in resignation. Sam’s face reflected continued fondness for the old girl. “Could manage a conversation in a pinch.”

 

Spike nodded thoughtfully. “Might do. Don’t think Stalin has his eyes on Scandinavia just yet. Too busy gobblin’ up elsewhere for the moment.”

 

“Want to head up that way then? Sam was anxious to get to Russia where he was certain the next true nasties were to be found to appease his appetite and his sense of honor. So far they had ambled about in Germany as Spike searched for his missing lady.

 

They had been in Nuremberg and everyone seemed nervous about the trials that were being prepared for accused war criminals. Most of the really big names had managed to evade capture by committing suicide or magically escaping to parts unknown but even so those about to face the music had the whole world’s attention. Retribution was at hand.

 

The city had started to remind Spike of the atmosphere in another German city a decade before as the Olympic games held the eyes of the world for a much happier reason. The sense of nervous anticipation was the same and it was visceral. It made his demon twitch.

 

He’d half expected to find Dru there, drawn by all the high emotion, but as so many times before there was no sign of her. He’d been more than happy to leave.

 

“Where to, Captain?” Sam nudged Spike from his musings.

 

They were in Passau and just as the confluence of three rivers beckoned with different options, so did the possible choices in Spikes quest for his lost love.

 

Spike thought back over the years and tried to suss out his best choice. The Danube sang to him with sweet memories of a trip not too long after he and Dru had become independent from their elders with the whole world at their feet. He closed his eyes and thought back to heady nights in the ancient parts of Prague, stolen kisses and more while dancing their way over the Charles bridge.

 

Some less than happy memories too, of course. Having to drag Dru away from the Strahov Monastery when she decided to indulge in an impromptu massacre in honor of her beloved daddy being the one that stood out. Actually, that was the main reason they had to leave the charming place.

 

Dru had always vowed they’d return one day. Perhaps Dru was remembering too and missing him. They had never been apart this long before. He bit back on his sadness and turned to Sam with resolution, “Prague. You’ll love the city. Lots of character and charm. Then we can keep goin’ north fightin’ your new war.”

 

“Prague it is then, Captain. Lead on.” Sam smiled affably. He had a feeling his mentor had personal reasons for the choice. Spike always got that look of heartbreak when he let himself get caught up in memories of his girl.

 

Sam could understand. He missed his Jussie something fierce! At least he didn’t have any expectations of ever seeing her beautiful hazel eyes ever again under the circumstances. His girl was firmly in his past. Spike’s gal was a vampire though and there was no reason he had to give up the dream… unless she was dust, of course. Spike seemed to think he would know if that was the case thought so he continued to search. Sam hoped she proved to be worth the devotion.

 

***

 

Prague was a bust like all the other places they had searched but it wasn’t totally without merit. Another new year had come without a sighting but later that month there was a bit of hope.

 

They’d run into a vampire in the formerly bustling Jewish Quarter. He swore that he’d seen a female, British, vampire that sounded too much like Dru to be a coincidence. She was in the company of a Lister demon and had created quite a stir at St. Nicholas church picking off worshippers after Midnight Mass on Christmas Eve. That sounded like Dru’s sense of humor too. Hunting at that particular saint’s church on that day would appeal to her sense of whimsy.

 

Her demon companion had stolen a car of some minor official and they had rushed to outrun the outraged locals.

 

“Can’t seem to break her of the same old habits,” Spike sighed. “Peaches gave her a taste for the clergy and little kiddies. Put either of those on the menu and sooner or later you wind up with an angry mob callin’ for your dust. Glad she had someone watching her flank.”

 

Sam had a feeling he was not going to be nearly as happy to catch up with this Drusilla as Spike would be. She sounded like far more trouble than she could possibly be worth to him.

 

The nervous vampire informant had claimed to have heard a rumor that the pair had been headed for Warsaw so Sam and Spike prepared for another journey. At least this time they were headed in the direction that Lawson had a yen to travel. Poland was knee deep in Soviet troops and plenty of nasty humans just begging to be eaten.

 

Stalin’s brutal reign was all that Sam had expected and worse. The people who had just survived one hell during the war were now facing starvation and virtual slavery under their new overlords. Stalin’s own Russian people weren’t being spared so the newly acquired territories weren’t surprised to find themselves treated the same way by old Uncle Joe.

 

***

 

Warsaw, like most of Europe, was still clearing rubble and trying to begin the long chore of rebuilding. Also, like every other city in Europe, it had far more orphans than in years past.

 

They finally found Dru.

 

***

 

The woman… demon… writhed like the snake she resembled.

 

Sam was struck with horror as he watched her waft through the blood and gore, blood coating her lower jaw and neck running to meet the already blood-soaked blouse that had layers of red already dried.

 

He’d never seen his demon face, of course. Maybe one day there would be a way to get a picture quick enough to know what he looked like. Spike’s demon face was vaguely leonine and not really repellant. This vampire had the look of a viper.

 

She seemed to be in something of a trance as she slithered through the piles of small corpses. So many children! Sam would have fled if Spike hadn’t been there with him.

 

Spike held out his hands to her and smiled a bit sadly. “Come to Spike, Pet. Naught else to eat here. Let Spike take care of his Princess.”

 

The vampiress blinked and looked at them for the first time. Sam almost expected a forked tongue to shoot out in query and flinched backward.

 

“Come on poodle. Got a little brother to meet,” Spike motioned towards Sam.

 

Dru fixed her gaze on the youngest member of their family with interest. “Pixies said daddy was making a new wee one. ‘e’s pretty, Spike. Can we keep ‘im?”

 

Sam shuddered.

 

“Not some tame animal or babe, luv. This here is Sam Lawson late of the US Navy and a damned fine vampire.”

 

Dru came closer staring into his eyes as if in search of Sam’s long-missing soul.

 

“Watch yourself, Uncle Sam, this one has a powerful thrall,” Spike warned.

 

Dru smiled and it didn’t lessen the terrifying visage she presented one bit. “Do you want to dance in the moonlight little brother?”

 

Spike narrowed his eyes. Just his luck that Dru was sizing up another possible bed partner. ‘Really! What more does she want from me? I do whatever she wants even when some of it makes me a bloody lobcock.’

 

“Think you already have a willing dance partner ma’am.” Sam tried to look honored as he rejected the dubious come-on.

 

“Right he is, pet. Missed you while you were off adventurin’. You must have lost track of time, been a long while,” Spike bit his lower lip and reached for her.

 

“My pretty, pretty, Spike,” Dru cooed. “Come to fetch mummy ’ome.” Her demon face faded to a human one that would have been quite delicate and pretty without all the blood.

 

She looked around as if seeing the carnage for the first time. “I’ve been so lost, Spike. My knight wasn’t there to escort me to the tournaments and slay the dragons. The squires tried and tried but weren’t up to the task.”

 

“I’m here now, pet. Come with me and let’s get you cleaned up, okay?”

 

Dru let Spike lead her from the now silent orphanage to the small apartment they had commandeered for their stay in the Polish capital. They were fortunate that it still had running water. They were going to need plenty of it to get her clean.

 

Buffy and Sam watched as Spike tenderly washed and groomed his beloved speaking to her softly and tenderly. Making promises never to disappoint her ever again or make her have to rely on incompetent squires.

 

Dru was almost childlike in her manner as though she was an innocent just awakening from a bad nightmare. She trembled as she looked at the blood-soaked clothing that Spike had removed before helping her into the warm and inviting tub. “So much red, Spike,” she blinked looking confused as if having no idea where it all came from!

 

In all honesty, Buffy had never seen Drusilla in quite this bad a condition. Her various companions hadn’t had a clue about how to care for her. ‘Doubt she would have survived much longer if Spike hadn’t found her.’ She wasn’t sure if she should be happy or sad that Spike had been successful. There was something about Dru that inspired pity, always had. Still, she was not safe to be allowed to wander about undusty.

 

“There, pet. All clean and tidy again,” Spike purred as he finished removing the last tangle in her long tresses. “Let’s get you in bed then. Imagine you’re knackered. Nothin’ a bit of kip won’t cure.” He tenderly tucked her into the bed but before he could leave the room Dru began to sob.

 

“So little, Spike. All alone with no one,” she sniffled. “Sent them back to their mummy’s I did. Like my mummy, with the angels now.”

 

Dru continued to cry softly as Spike held her. Finally, exhaustion overcame her and she slept.

 

Sam wasn’t sure what to think. In a world of crazy, this wasn’t something he’d ever had to deal with before and it shook him. Spike said he’d been with her for over a half century, surely she wasn’t always like this! How had Spike remained sane?

 

Spike must have guessed at Lawson’s thoughts and motioned to the parlor with a finger to his lips to warn quiet.

 

He carefully closed the bedroom door and reached for the bottle of vodka that came with the apartment much to Spike’s delight. He poured a glass for them both and took a seat in the comfy chair.

 

“She gets like this after goin’ on a tear. See you gotta understand Dru.” He took a deep drink and refilled his glass. Spike didn’t like telling tales out of school but Sam had earned being in his confidence if anyone had. “She was a good girl. The real thing. All pure and whatnot. Ready to take vows to God when she was turned. He drove her mad first though for he ever turned her. Won’t go into the details. Even Dru can’t talk about it and that was back in the 1860s. The parts of her that still hold onto the human are still there just too weak to keep control. Don’t mean it’s not there though. Poor lamb has that wee spark in her that looks at what she does and judges herself like some damned Puritan minister or the like. Usually goes into a decline then for a bit if I’m not there to pull her out.”

 

Sam drank in silence letting Spike get it all out. He couldn’t do anything for the madwoman in the other room but he could be a ready ear for his friend at least. Spike had been bearing the load on his own for ages it seemed. Maybe it would help having someone to just listen and care.

 

“Gets herself into fixes when the demon runs free. That’s what happened.” He set the glass aside and resorted to drinking straight from the bottle. Seeing how far Dru had fallen had shaken him badly. “I should never have brought her to Europe. Knew it was that demon wantin’ in the action. Knew it could get bad. Thought I could keep her safe from her own worst self but she slipped out when I wasn’t there.” Spike shuddered. “Bloody hell, Sam, she likely’s come close to dust a dozen or more times while I was arsing around Europe in all the wrong places!”

 

“Not your fault, Captain.” Sam reminded him. “Not like you ran out on her. You’ve been looking from the start.”

 

“Not soon enough. Wasted weeks expectin’ her to just waltz back in to our flat in Berlin. She was never gone far or long before.”

 

“Like you said, the war was making it worse. Not your fault. Don’t think you studied under Freud or some other headshrinker.”

 

“Hardly. Can design a damned fine ship and work the books to give maximum profit but not a clue about how to help the woman I love.”

 

“Guess you just love her and hope it’s enough.”

 

“Wasn’t demon enough for her,” Spike confided. “Wants someone like her daddy. Hell, she wants her daddy and that bastard’s… well you met him. What do you think?”

 

“Useless excuse if you’re wanting my honest opinion.” Sam agreed. “He should have done something to try to help her since he broke her.”

 

“That soul they shoved in him didn’t seem to do much for his heart where Dru’s concerned,” Spike agreed. “He broke her and continues to break her piece by piece even now after all the years and miles.”

 

“I’m just goin’ to have to dig deep and be what she needs. Can’t have her leavin’ again. Not sure I can survive it and she damn sure can’t.”

 

The two drank in silence as Dru slept on unaware looking as peaceful as any angel or child.

 

***

Minsk was better than Warsaw had been. Spike seemed to be able to keep Dru from her absolute worst instincts but Lawson noted that the still quite human-like vampire he had known was being replaced by one more demon influenced. As Spike had vowed, he was determined to be demon enough for Dru this time.

 

“Damn it, Captain, don’t lose yourself while trying to save her!” Sam cautioned. “It’s more likely to end with both of you dust if you keep doing that.”

 

“What do you suggest I do, Uncle Sam, desert her like everyone else?”

 

“NO, just don’t stop being who you are while trying to be what she thinks she wants. You’re not Angelus.”

 

Spike paled and looked as if he’d been struck. “Nothin’ like that Plonker.”

 

“No, you’re not. She needs you, Spike, not her half-assed sire. What did he ever do for her anyway?”

 

***

 

By the time they arrived in Stalingrad Spike had begun to consider that Lawson might be more right than not. His putting his demon in the driver's seat wasn’t helping anyone. True, there had been no more orphanages or other spectacles but they were still dancing on the edge of disaster trying to appease Dru’s desires without giving her full license. It was a delicate dance that was going to get them tripped up eventually.

 

“Been thinkin’ and maybe I need to undo the mess I made,” Spike sighed.

 

“What mess is that?”

 

Spike nodded in the direction of Dru who was serving tea to two of her favorite dolls and, evidently a visiting pixie.

 

“Seems the biggest mistake I made was lettin’ Dru talk me into coming over here when things started goin’ pear-shaped. She was better in the USA. Had her moments, that’ll never change, but the demon was easier to handle over there without all the human evil coaxin’ out the worst.”

 

“Plenty of evil in the States too, Captain.”

 

“Yeah but lots of distractions too. Right brilliant music scene for one. Dru likes it too, not like Paris where she lost interest in all the poets and writers. Need to get her mind on other things, bring out her softer side and I don’t see bein’ able to do that here.”

 

“So what’re you saying?”

 

“Think it’s time to head across the pond. Wanna go home, sailor?”

 

Sam looked wistful for a moment. It was tempting but then what? “Still got my mission.”

 

Spike smiled sadly. He’d known it would come to this eventually and had been putting it off as long as he could. He’d come to cherish the relationship with Lawson. It was like having the brother he never had or that best friend that had always eluded him in both his life as a human and vampire. He knew that Sam brought out the best in him, made him strive to be more than just the monster. He would always appreciate that and him.

 

They fell into companionable silence and listened to the radio broadcast. Bernard Baruch, buddy of old Woodrow Wilson and financial wizard, advisor to Presidents and Grand Poobah's was talking about the increasingly bad relationship between the USSR and their former allies. He’d just tossed out a term calling it a cold war much to Spike’s amusement. “Right oxymoron there!”

 

“Don’t know about that. Seems like the perfect name for it. Also sounds like it’s tailor-made for the likes of me! Suppose I’m made to order to be the first real cold warrior in this cold war don’t you think?”

 

Spike grinned. “There is that. So you’ll be stayin’ then?”

 

“Got a mission, got a plan. Doesn’t mean I won’t miss you.”

 

Spike bit his bottom lip. “Well, just don’t get yourself dusted and we’ll work on some post-war reunion once you get this out of your system.”

 

“Same with you, brother. Maybe one day I’ll show you my girl.”

 

“Lookin’ forward to it,” Spike replied softly with only the tiniest bit of a warble to the words.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N:  
> The Aftermath of World War II: Collaboration & Retribution https://youtu.be/b4_PCq_SMcM
> 
> Stalin in Eastern Europe post WWII https://youtu.be/vYWOwRywalA
> 
> Ellis Island name changes were not as frequent as legend has but it did happen https://www.smithsonianmag.com/smithsonian-institution/ask-smithsonian-did-ellis-island-officials-really-change-names-immigrants-180961544/
> 
> Nuremberg trials ended Nov 20, 1945 – Oct 1, 1946
> 
> "The Nuremberg Trials" https://youtu.be/szhpgDz5iC8 and verdicts 1946 https://youtu.be/BA7JRx14GNg
> 
> The trials in a nutshell (17 minutes) https://youtu.be/vywGZzb9O4M
> 
> Film shown at Nuremberg trial about the camps https://youtu.be/_pQJ42ONPDo
> 
> Orphans after the war https://www.thenation.com/article/innocents-lost-postwar-orphans/
> 
> Hard life even if not an orphan https://youtu.be/XW8m4oMMX3w
> 
> Warsaw’s damage in WWII Warsaw and rebuilding efforts 1946 https://youtu.be/6rYrW0zcM7I
> 
> Short and lovely travel vid of Passau, Germany https://youtu.be/q6w-HO6PoY4 Nice break from the bleak
> 
> Bernard Baruch, the multimillionaire financier, and adviser to presidents from Woodrow Wilson to Harry S. Truman, coined the term “Cold War” to describe the increasingly chilly relations between two World War II Allies: the United States and the Soviet Union. https://tinyurl.com/y6bupf5d
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reconstruction_of_Germany
> 
> Regular German soldiers perspective https://youtu.be/4maBAsQWz4U
> 
> Life in post-war Eastern Europe https://youtu.be/dfq5fTvbS28
> 
> Lest we think evil was the commonality
> 
> https://youtu.be/0R8_cTt2kzI
> 
> https://youtu.be/5bENHE2Fw5A
> 
> I highly recommend watching the various youtube vids from the Shoah Foundation with first-hand accounts (good and bad) about the experiences of real people who survived the horrors of the Holocaust. This will give you an idea of the Shoah foundation project https://youtu.be/41vueL9zqA8
> 
> Germany after the war https://youtu.be/YcflnToTaWI
> 
> Czechoslovakia post-WWII https://youtu.be/zDsYKSmXP3A
> 
> Warsaw 1946 https://youtu.be/6rYrW0zcM7I
> 
> Belorussia (Minsk) and the War https://youtu.be/Ox1pP8VDeOo
> 
> Stalingrad post-WWII https://youtu.be/9xv13pYknP4
> 
> St. Nicholas Church, Prague https://youtu.be/fWmhSE-61X8 (Mozart played their organ at one time!)


	34. Chapter 34

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N I am not including the IDW comic storyline from “Spike: Old Wounds” where it had Spike in LA in 1947 encountering The Hermanos Número (Numero Cinco). I am picking and choosing from the Comics as they are not necessarily canon and even Joss has said that if they ever were to do the show again, they would likely not use any of the comics as canon...just as with the “official” novels. Some I have used, some not and in one case twisted a bit. 
> 
> One quote from Pangs written by Jane Espenson used.
> 
> I am going with my own headcanon regarding Dru. I’ve always thought that her human name was Edith and that Miss Edith (who was always being punished or was talking to her) was the residual human within her. This is in no way canon obviously. Likewise, I have always thought a case could be made that she might have been a Potential Slayer complete with Slayer dreams and that is also in no way canon. 
> 
>  
> 
> [](https://imgur.com/H4g0xO4)  
> 

Chapter 34

 

“Daddy should ‘ave raised little brother right. Can’t ‘ardly see the demon most times.” Dru pronounced sadly as Sam took his leave of them. She liked him well enough but he was not demon enough for her to fully approve. Spike could be the same way but she could always coax him into some serious depravity and chaos if she insisted. It was better for Sam to be gone on his own before the human in Spike began to strengthen even more.

 

“Lawson’s just fine as is, pet. He’s demon enough when it’s needed. Plenty of dead bodies along the trail to prove that.”

 

Dru raised a brow but didn’t argue any further. She had seen the sort of victims that Lawson and even her Spike had been choosing. None that could truly be called an innocent among them!

 

Daddy’d always been disappointed with her Spike. Angelus was a hard example to live up to after all. A true artist! Even Dru failed from time to time. ‘Then there were delicious punishments with ribbons of red that took weeks to ‘eal.’ She missed her daddy.

 

Her human father had been a great believer in the admonition to not spare the rod lest the child becomes spoiled. Edith had been such a good girl unless the Pixies showed her pictures.

 

When she was very young she had told her parents about the visions asking them what they meant. Then she had begun to see frightening pictures of young girls fighting monsters and horrible beasts like the Priests said lived in hell. Those visions scared her the most.

 

Her parents went to their Bishop convinced that their little girl was possessed and in need of an exorcism. He had examined her closely and questioned Edith at length. Finally, he suggested the girl was merely seeking attention and reminded her parents that females were given to hysterics.

 

Her father tried to ‘beat the devil’ out of her the next time one of her visions invaded her dreams. Edith learned to say nothing when the pixies came after that.

 

Not until her confession where her precious daddy Angelus was playing a nasty trick and pretending to be a priest and then told her that she belonged to the devil and there was no salvation for her did she speak of them.

 

Hiding away at the convent and even taking her temporary vows did nothing to stop the visions and voices and then Angelus found her there anyway.

 

He had been right. There were no cakes for Edith. She was a very bad girl indeed, marked by the beast and destined to bring death and destruction to all those she loved.

 

She didn’t understand why this was so. Edith tried ever so hard to be a good girl, to do as both of her daddies had asked.

 

She was glad that Spike was back. He calmed the voices and kept the monsters away. She could find moments of peace with him. He took such good care of his Princess! He saved her from evil Edith and always loved his mummy Dru.

 

***

 

Buffy watched Spike herd Dru away from the sorts of massacres most likely to bring them both to a quick end. Dru still preferred the young and innocent but nothing like the excesses she had indulged in during their years apart were tolerated. Spike made it clear that he’d prove himself demon enough in other ways than those likely to see them both dusted.

 

“Look, petal, your precious daddy was smart about things and he was bloody demon enough for you! Didn’t see him rushing in to pick targets likely to get him a bit of wood in the heart. Never saw him get into a fight he didn’t know he could win for that matter. Stop makin’ it seem like I’m some Nancy boy for not indulgin’ your crack-brained urges!”

 

Dru pouted but couldn’t disagree with facts. “Can I at least ‘ave a pretty girl or two Spike? These Russian peasants are bitter and stringy. Most are sickly and thin.”

 

“That’s why Uncle Sam and I were steering you to the commissars and the like. They’re well-fed enough. Old Marx would be disgusted with them slappin’ his name on the government Stalin’s put together. Just as corrupt and greedy as anything the Czar’s indulged in.” Spike rolled his eyes at his sad-eyed sire. “Fine. We’ll find you a nice girl or two. Maybe one of their wives or mistresses will do for you.”

 

“Do we ‘ave to stay ‘ere, Spike? Sam’s gone off to Moscow and Stalingrad is so dull.”

 

Spike picked her up and twirled her around grinning widely. He’d been trying to get her to agree to a move for what seemed like an age. “Then we shall move. What do you say to Scandinavia, luv? Lots of pretty young things to be found no doubt. We can hunt up a Viking for my princess, eh?”

 

The Red Army had occupied and subdued Estonia since before the war’s end so there were still plenty of methods of transportation to Tallinn. Finding a safe passage from there south to Stockholm might be tricky but Spike was nothing if not resourceful. He’d have them both on the right side of that iron curtain that Churchill had been going on about in no time.

 

***

 

Stockholm was a glistening jewel, especially after the endless wasteland that was the rest of the Continent. Holding themselves neutral through the war had worked for them and Sweden was pretty much untouched.

 

Those countries who had opted out of the conflict had been sneered at by both the Allies and the Axis but both sides had known how to exploit each one in different ways. Some, like Sweden, had aided the Allies while placating the Germans by selling them much needed steel and other hard to come by commodities.

 

Some, like the Free State of Ireland, had sent men to fight in the British armed forces and all but openly assisted the Allies all the while refusing Churchills demands to build and use bases within their borders.

 

Switzerland and its efficient and very private banking system had become invaluable for squirreling away the plunder. Each “neutral” country had its own reasons and own sympathies but in the end, they had managed to save themselves and their people.

 

Sweden had saved more than just their own population having taken in very large numbers of refugees.

 

The lovely city gleamed clean and whole and Spike and Dru relaxed in luxury they hadn’t had available since Hitler invaded Poland. The economy was booming and the atmosphere was joyful and optimistic.

 

The demon that clawed at Dru’s insides with the restless need for evil doing had receded making life easier for them both. The blood urges would always call to them both but Dru could once more act with prudence.

 

Spike wished that Sam had stayed with them. Not only would the lad’s familiarity with Swedish have come in handy but Spike wished that he could have seen THIS Dru. All Sam had seen was the worst side of his Princess. Lawson never got to see the playful girl, the almost innocent charmer. Spike doubted that he would have believed Dru was capable of any of that. Maybe one day…

 

The further they got from the charnel house that was Europe the less Dru demanded she contribute to the carnage. Now when she cried at night it was for her lost mother and sisters or in sorrow for all the orphaned babies rather than in remorse for having shed their blood in a demonic frenzy.

 

Buffy had come to expect signs of possible empathy and remorse from Spike and Sam but she saw the strength of the human bits in Dru too when she wasn’t plagued by the madness and demon influence that tended to dominate her.

 

Buffy remembered something about the demon called the Judge a couple of years before in her real-time. As she heard it, that demon hadn’t been able to touch Spike or Dru lest they would die all because of the humanity still in them. Buffy had heard that a couple of minions hadn’t fared as well in their encounter with the Judge having been burned to ash at his touch.

 

Buffy concluded that if Angelus had not tortured the girl to the point of insanity before turning her that Dru would likely have been similar to Spike and Sam. She might have been quite human at times and certainly more in control of the demon’s actions.

 

When she let herself think about it, she had to wonder if Angelus was the one to actually be the outlier. She’d seen strong human traits in Darla and even Dracula too. Perhaps that was the actual norm?

 

Yeah, fledges came out hot and hungry… looking to feed and kill. But perhaps in time, if they weren’t sired to be minions or cannon fodder, perhaps there was room for reasoning with them, brokering some sort of truce.

 

She’d have to look into that when she was once again able to ask questions and get a reply.

 

Spike set aside the first book he’d had the luxury of indulging in for what seemed an age. Orwell’s ‘1984’ had made him laugh at humans and their endless folly.

 

“Wouldn’t be a bit surprised if they don’t learn a bit from this latest mess of theirs.” He nodded at the book, “Critics are calling this dystopian and far-fetched but my money says one day this bloke will be seen as a prophet.”

 

Dru set aside her doll that she had been grooming and nodded in agreement. “The stars say my Knight is the wisest in the land. ‘Umpty Dumpty is truly broken even with all their glue. ‘Ooves more for war ‘orses than binding shattered eggs.”

 

“Well, this whole alliance’ll hold it off for a while but can’t see all of ‘em playin’ nice forever. Too much history and bad blood. Give ‘em credit for tryin’ though. Between this NATO thing and the rules they’ve put together in Geneva, might hold for a bit at least.”

 

Dru resumed her hairdressing. “Will we be staying ‘ere long Spike? Miss Edith is ever so disappointed that she’s seen no trolls at all. No elves either. Do you think the naughty Nazis killed them all?”

 

Spike gave it some thought. “Suspect most of those old ones left long before now, pet. More likely the Christian missionaries were the ones to do ‘em in.”

 

Dru growled. “If the ‘oly Fathers were right and there is only one maker of everything, why do all the religions want to get rid of the others? Wouldn’t the trolls and elves and even demons all be made by the same one that they want everyone to worship?”

 

Spike grinned. He loved these fleeting moments when his Princess was lucid and showed a bright mind worthy of conversation. “Dunno luv, that’s a really good question. Seems most aren’t that secure about the power of the deity they claim to serve.”

 

Dru giggled. “The way they ‘old out their crosses and yell at demons to get back while soiling their drawers is funny.”

 

Spike joined in the laugh. “Seem more afraid of some bugger they named devil than confident of their god who they say is so powerful could crush him easy. Lots of fear without even meetin’ a proper demon.”

 

“Tasty fear, all spicy and ‘ot,” Dru nodded.

 

Buffy thought about Giles and how his head would explode hearing two vampires discussing politics, philosophy, and theology. According to the Council, demons weren’t capable of much thought beyond creating mayhem and feeding. Of course, they also said that vampires couldn’t love or feel any real emotions but she knew that was a crock of crap too.

 

“Way Darla told it, the Demons were here first. Come to think of it, that fits some other myths and legends too. Lilith, first wife of Adam, the one created at the same time he was… not the wife made from his rib… she’s the mother of all demons in some tales.”

 

“Adam ‘ad two wives?”

 

“Two totally different creation stories in Genesis. Two flood tales too. One creation tale has both male and female created at the same time. Second one has Eve bein’ made from Adam’s rib. Accordin’ to some, Lilith was the first one and she pissed off God by thinkin’ herself equal to Adam. She was banished and God took a rib and made a properly subservient wife out of it, named that one Eve. Lilith goes off in a huff and starts poppin’ out demons and Bob’s your uncle...here we are today.”

 

Buffy seemed to remember Giles telling them that demons, the old ones, were there first long before humans. “Hum… guess humans are like the conquering armies who wipe out the indigenous people wherever they go. Kinda makes my job a little iffy in a way but like Spike said when Hus was attacking, ‘You won. All right? You came in and you killed them and you took their land. That's what conquering nations do. It's what Caesar did, and he's not going around saying, "I came, I conquered, I felt really bad about it." The history of the world isn't people making friends. You had better weapons, and you massacred them. End of story.’ Guess no one should be surprised that Spike has some deeper if squicky, thoughts.”

 

***

 

Spike and Dru did some hunting in the Gamla Stan area stalking the cobbled streets and picking off a couple of unwary lovers looking at some of the many frescoes along the way. Not exactly the sort of victim Spike chose when with Sam but a far cry from Dru’s worst instincts. No torture before feeding either and Spike’s meal remained alive while Dru’s could survive if they were found in time.

 

Buffy still felt conflicted watching her vampires feed. It was like the horror she felt when she’d seen a PETA mailing with scenes of factory farms and the suffering of all those animals. She still ate meat, loved eating meat, but if she thought too much about how that ham got in the sandwich it bothered her. She had finally decided that as long as the kills were quick and clean she had to just live with it. Not that she could stop them anyway. Maybe in her real-time she could figure out a way that could address meeting a vampire's needs without the horror and without death. At least a few vampires might be willing to play by new rules.

 

She already knew that not all feeding resulted in death, in fact, it was rare in Spike’s case. If a vampire killed every time they fed they’d run out of food supply pretty quickly. More often it was catch and release unless the vampire was damaged like Dru or pure evil like Angelus.

 

They had been keeping their hunting grounds to places like the old city and the Royal National City Park for the most part. No orphanages or convents and Dru seemed okay with it. Buffy tried to reflect more on the possibilities that revealed instead of the judgment she automatically felt in the beginning.

 

Spike had paid a visit to a branch office of his business management and made arrangements for their needs and changes in investments for the future. New papers were acquired to allow ease of travel too. It wasn’t just vampires and demons in need of such services. The war had left many humans with the need to rebuild identities.

 

***

 

Dru woke with a start. “Spike. Why did they think you killed that Sophie girl? Were we in Denmark in 1940?” 

 

They had decided to head to Copenhagen just the night before and that plan seemed to have triggered one of Dru’s visions.

 

“Not sure what you mean, pet. Of course we weren’t there. We were in Berlin, remember?”

 

“Those men who watch say we killed lots of girls with potential and also the Slayer there but you’ve not ‘ad another Slayer yet ‘ave you?” Dru looked perplexed. “So many girls all die so young. Some ‘ave proper ‘usbands and even jobs but in the end, they die. Swords and fangs and spiny beasts… always girls and always die.” Dru had a faraway look on her face. “They bite and snap and spit and crush they do but in the end she dies and the next one comes. Your next one will be dark and quick. Even ‘er little one won’t be enough to make ‘er fight in the end.”

 

Spike furrowed his brow in confusion. “Havin’ those dreams again, pet? The ones where you’re both demon and the girl fightin’ ‘em?”

 

Buffy had seen this before but had never thought much about it. Something about the details this time jogged a memory of having the same dream herself in the past. “Oh my God!!! Dru must have been a potential Slayer! Her Slayer dreams must have gotten tangled up with her second sight. That must be the visions that her parents thought were signs of possession. They took her to the Priests like my parents took me to the shrink.” Knowing first hand how terrifying those dreams could be, Buffy was even more in sympathy towards the damaged vampiress.

 

***

 

Copenhagen had not fared as well as Stockholm but it did have ship passage to Cherbourg in France and then on to America. Still, it had its charms.

 

They played and hunted in the Tivoli Gardens where Spike regaled Dru with the memory of a trip he had taken with his parents when quite small to the same amusement park and pleasure garden. It was a fairyland to a small boy and Dru claimed fairies were still present.

 

They rode the Rutschebanen and screamed along with the humans as the coaster peaked and fell. The ride was old but didn’t date back to the time of young William’s visit having only been built in 1914, not that his mother would have ever let him near a ride as terrifying as a roller coaster. The Merry-go-round had been the wildest ride he remembered from that magical time and it was still there to enjoy with only some upgrades.

 

“The pantomimes and music programs were brilliant,” Spike rhapsodized. “Was like the sort of place Father Christmas must have lived in to a lad like I was. Was just before my father went off to war and everything went to shit.” The bittersweet memories seemed fitting with post-war Denmark where sadness and loss were mixed with joy and hope.

 

Spike had negotiated passage with a fishing vessel that had a sideline in trafficking people from place to place as refugees sought a new beginning. They were to join three other couples on the trip to France in a few days time.

 

Spike looked at the map and decided they had time for another bit of pure tourism. “Not plannin’ on comin’ back this way for a long while, Princess. Can’t be this close without a side trip. ‘Sides, our boat won’t leave for another couple of days.”

 

Hearing Spike quote passages from Hamlet as they toured Helsingor castle, the model for Shakespeare’s Elsinore, mesmerized Buffy and Dru. “He could read a phone book and I’d sit and listen,” Buffy sighed. Really Spike had a voice that was hot with everyday conversation but when you added poetry to the mix, bra’s would unsnap on their own!

 

***

 

The sailing was uncomfortable with rough seas and crowded quarters but the cross Atlantic trip would be one steeped in luxury and ease so they made do.

 

The Queen Mary had been reoutfitted as a luxury liner once more, the pride of the White Star Line. During the war, she had served as a troop ship but now was ready for regular trips between Europe and New York for the fortunate few able to pay for the accommodation. Spike dipped into their assets and had arranged for a suite for their passage. In a little under four days they would finally be back on soil in the USA and far from the temptations that had so overwhelmed Dru in the old world. Spike felt the tension ease the bonds around his heart. They were almost home free at last. A new decade in the New World… just what they needed!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tallinn Estonia https://youtu.be/hVv4aRAnS5U (modern) 
> 
> Estonia was hit hard by WWII losing up to 25% of their population. Post-WWII many more died during the Soviet deportations. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Estonia_in_World_War_II The history of that place and time reads quite differently depending upon who is telling the story but the fact remains that the population was devastated no matter what fingers point where.
> 
> Sweden in WWII and aftermath https://youtu.be/bcoy2ZCLnw8 
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sweden_during_World_War_II 
> 
> These nations all had their reasons for the neutrality beyond trying to keep from becoming a target of one side or the other. Some, like Ireland, had their own domestic concerns. Churchill wanted official bases in Ireland for the allies and was furious to be turned down by Eamon de Valera, President of Ireland. De Valera had fought in the Irish revolution and had been spared execution only because of his birth in the United States. The Irish Free State was still newly independent from the UK (1922, it didn’t become the Republic of Ireland until 1949) and De Valera did not trust Churchill and the British government to leave once the war ended if they were allowed the bases. Nonetheless, they had many of their people join the British forces to actively fight in WWII and they gave aid to the Allies throughout.  
> https://www.historyireland.com/20th-century-contemporary-history/behind-the-green-curtain-irelands-phoney-neutrality-during-world-war-ii/  
> Other nations had their own reasons and alliances while maintaining official neutrality.  
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Neutral_powers_during_World_War_II  
> https://www.nytimes.com/1997/01/26/weekinreview/the-not-so-neutrals-of-world-war-ii.html
> 
> Gamla Stan (Stockholm) https://youtu.be/eQOnENJ4l9c 
> 
> Lilith https://www.britannica.com/topic/Lilith-Jewish-folklore  
> Two creation stories in Genesis https://biologos.org/articles/israels-two-creation-stories/ https://web.cn.edu/kwheeler/Genesis_texts.html 
> 
> The Slayers mentioned were not of my creation: Elizabeth Winters was a Slayer born in 1921 and who was active in Chicago during World War II. She had been called in 1942 (though had been training as a Potential since 1936 when she was 15). She ran the detective agency owned by her husband who was serving overseas and used the few connections to the mob that she had to investigate "underground" dealings. Her Watcher was Marcus Redmond. Tales of the Slayer, Volume 2: Stakeout on Rush Street
> 
> Sophie Carstensen was a Slayer in the Comic Spike and Dru: Pretty Maids all in a Row. Spike was blamed for her death (in Copenhagen in September 1940). Sophie was born in Copenhagen on August 17th, 1923. Her Watcher was Yanna Narvik, who trained her since before her calling, in August 1939. She preferred to fight with a family heirloom, a Danish cavalry sword, crafted in 1734. Her parents were killed by the vampire king Gorm when he learned she was the Slayer, and she eventually avenged them slaying him. In 1940, she was tasked with hunting down and killing Spike and Drusilla, as the two were then slaughtering Potential Slayers. She died in combat against Spike on September 7 of the same year. Sophie being killed by Spike contradicts the official canon, which establishes that Spike has only killed two Slayers: Xin Rong and Nikki Wood.
> 
> Copenhagen at wars end https://youtu.be/kvoL2jhsyPo 
> 
> Tivoli gardens https://youtu.be/ozpJCMrgGzY 
> 
> Kronborg Castle, Denmark https://youtu.be/Z9KBgPivvuU 
> 
> Queen Mary https://youtu.be/EcTvdWa8xh0  
> And a tour (our time period but much is the same as they would have seen) https://youtu.be/zDHTjktJtIM 
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/RMS_Queen_Mary


	35. Chapter 35

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [](https://imgur.com/j4xsL50)
> 
> Zoe Kuryakin was a Slayer in Tales of the Slayer, Vol 4 “Undeadsville” written by Michael Reaves. She was turned during her Cruciamentum and killed the Watcher/vampire and her Watcher who set her up in 1952 NYC. 
> 
> The trip to Rome I sent them on was made to incorporate the comic “A Dark Place, Part 3 that was set in Rome where Spike and Dru encountered the Black Widower demon and Spike saved Pearl (sister of Nash) becoming something of a hero to her. That played into later comic storyline so I chose to include it here for those who see the comics as canon. I added the Immortal to the story as a setup for a future scene in my story.

Chapter 35

 

Buffy looked around at Times Square as Spike and Dru hunted. The Camel Cigarette billboard with the billowing smoke amused her. The Automat made her wish she could sample some of the yummy looking hot food and fresh pies behind the little brass or gold looking doors that were always being replenished by the busy cooks behind the wall of food choices.

 

Buffy had kind of expected a world like on ‘Happy Days’. She’d loved those re-runs as a kid. She could picture Spike in leather with slicked-back hair like the Fonz or Danny in Grease. His ‘poodle’ in a poodle skirt would only be fitting.

 

For many, it seemed like it was happy days. The Great War had been over for a few years but still there was celebration in the air. Lots of coupling up too, Buffy finally understood the origins of the term baby boom.

 

GI’s were coming home to their sweethearts or bringing home war brides to start families and build new lives.

 

For many, there were good union jobs with futures or loans available to start a business of their own. Young families were taking advantage of the GI Bill and had stars in their eyes as a bright new future beckoned. College was not only possible but affordable to many returning military, and new technologies offered opportunities to build wealth. Snug homes in the new suburbs were being sold to eager young buyers getting their piece of the American Dream. 

 

Of course, that was only true for some. ‘Happy Days’ were conditional.

 

Spike and Dru still followed the music to places like Harlem where their returning vets found little had changed for them. Instead of being greeted as the returning, conquering heroes like their white counterparts, veterans of color were expected to just go back to the place assigned to them by society long before the war. Men who had served just as the white troops had were called upstarts and worse when they tried to break the long-existing barriers that kept them ‘in their place’.

 

Poverty and discrimination were the everyday life faced by most. The jobs didn’t miraculously appear, nor did college. Loans were still turned down more often than granted. Even those who had served with distinction were relegated to the status of ‘colored’ or ‘boy’ or worse.

 

“Wow, if it’s like this here in New York City, I’ll bet it’s a gazillion times worse down south!”

 

Asians were still being given the side-eye as they tried to ease back into society. Many of them had to start from scratch having had their homes and businesses taken as they were shipped to internment camps all over the U.S. during the war years.

 

More than a few had been forced to make terrible choices to avoid losing everything and in an effort to keep their freedom.

 

The sweet lady who ran a supper club near the garment district and had rented the rooms to Buffy’s vampires had kept her family intact and out of those camps by working for the FBI helping to identify which of her Asian neighbors were Japanese and which were other Asian races not under suspicion.

 

It had broken her heart to seemingly be a traitor to her people but accepting the governments offer had kept the business and apartments safe from confiscation not to mention her parents and young son safely in their own home. Sometimes there were no good choices to be made.

 

Seeing the young Japanese children with their frightened yet curious eyes broke Buffy’s heart. “No child belonged in a cage!” 

 

Some had no memory of life before the camps. Families who had been citizens of the United States for generations and had worked hard building families, businesses, heck building the country itself, had been reduced to having to start over from scratch.

 

Large numbers of other American citizens had moved north from places like Puerto Rico trying to better their lives only to meet hostility and find themselves largely restricted to areas like Spanish Harlem thanks to redlining and other manipulations of financial resources that permitted de facto segregation. They, also, were regarded as second class citizens, or less. 

 

Even their returning veterans faced the same discrimination as their black neighbors in Harlem and other sections of that city and others across the country. They also had insults hurled at them with ‘Spick’ in place of the ‘N word’. The damage was the same as was the want and the violence that breeds and cultivates in poverty. For them and others, the bright new future did not open its arms wide in welcome.

 

Like in Europe, there were tons of refugees and displaced people heeding the call of the Statue of Liberty for the world to send its tired, poor people yearning to be free. 

 

Most people sympathized and welcomed those poor and oppressed but others grumbled about the anticipated diseases or squaller that the newcomers might bring. Some feared competition for jobs or fancied a loss of our ‘national identity’. There was also a great fear of all the supposed “communists” coming in to infect our politics… fear of the great ‘other’.

 

The government had even begun hearings trying to ferret out these supposed ‘Communists’ even though there were no laws against being an actual communist. People were investigated and threatened. Jobs lost and people blacklisted out of work when fingered by others as possible ‘reds’. Even such beloved figures as the popular Charlie Chaplin had been labeled a ‘commie’ and had been refused re-entry to the United States after he had taken a family trip to England.

 

Some people resented the Jews even those freshly freed from Hitler’s horror camps. Some blamed them, the victims, for the war and all its hardships. Along with the refugees came many old world prejudices and rivalries to join the home-grown variety.

 

It was a bubbling stew of people and cultures that, on one hand, was rich and lively and interesting but also held the potential for resentments, bigotry, fear, and violence if the heat turned up.

 

The 50s went like a blur of conflicting images as Buffy sampled the best and the worst of post-war America. 

 

*** 

 

Spike cursed as he removed another tube from the back of the television. He loved the new innovation, was addicted actually, but replacing tubes when they went out was a bit of a challenge for those not as free to move around in daylight. 

 

Tube testers were in many stores and easy to use to see just what ones needed to be replaced but they weren’t often open when Spike was free to travel. 

 

Buffy had to giggle a bit when the frustrated vampire, tired of being deprived of his weekly dose of ‘Topper’ rushed through the neighborhood trying to find a drug store with the needed testing equipment. The early sitcom about a ghost had tickled his fancy and the small television not working properly was making him antsy. 

 

Buffy laughed watching the vampire dash from shadow to shadow, suspected tubes in hand, trying to get to the tester before the store closed. ‘That’s classic Spike. When he has something he really wants he finds a way.’

 

“Dru got to watch the bloody Queen get crowned but I don’t get to see Cosmo get tormented by George and Marion. Not fair!” Dru had been teasing Spike all day saying that he was really just wishing for an alcoholic ghost dog of his own to take to the bars and terrorize the other patrons. Spike grinned at the thought and had to admit she was at least half right. “Would be bloody brilliant, that.”

 

Spike had already become a die-hard fan of the new entertainment that could bring the world into your own living room. He kept up with his favorite programs and even the news of the world. 

 

He’d been shocked when his native Britain had joined the nuclear powers with an H-Bomb test on an island off of Australia and had thought of Sam when they heard that Stalin was finally dead from a stroke. Gone were the days when you had to learn of events long after they happened at a distance.

 

Tubes tested and replacement for the bad tube stolen Spike settled into his comfy chair and prepared for an evening in with his newest toy. 

 

“I’m going out to do a bit of shopping,” Dru announced. “Saw a sweet little thing near Washington Street Park looks just my size and she ‘as the loveliest fashion sense. I’m peckish and could use a new frock.”

 

Dru was fairly stable and had been for quite a while so Spike no longer felt he had to watch her every move, every hunt. “Enjoy yourself, ducks.”

 

“Should I bring someone ‘ome for you?”

 

“Nah, still full from that loudmouthed vice cop we shared earlier.”

 

Dru pouted a bit. “You like that picture box too much Spike. We don’t go out as much.”

 

Spike looked sheepish. He had become something of a couch potato but the wonders of television had just lured him in and had him addicted before he knew it. “You’re right,” he admitted and got up and turned off the set. “Let’s go get you that new dress then go dancing, yeah? Palladium’ll have Latin dance tonight.”

 

Dru perked up. “I’d like that.”

 

Spike loved the new music and the freedom that went with rock and roll but he had taken a dislike to the type of dancing that went along with it. Dru loved the wilder forms of swing dancing that had become a craze but Spike avoided it whenever possible.

 

“Not dancin’ Dru. Gyratin’ about and tossing your partner around not my idea of dancin'.”

 

“That’s what I like though! It reminds me of daddy.”

 

“Yeah, and that’s another reason I hate it. Like my violence as violence. You’re right though. Angelus would be perfect with this rot. They all look like they’re havin’ fits out there on the dance floor. Music’s great, love the anarchy, but the gits tryin’ to move to it look like they’ve got a cattle prod up the arse and I don’t fancy it.” He shook his head in dismay. “ Best part of dancin’ is touchin’ your partner, seducin’ her a bit.”

 

“You like the tango though and it ‘as some violence.”

 

“True, but it’s the passionate kind not the epileptic.” Spike thought back to the first time he and Dru had tried a tango back in the ’30s when Valentino made the dance popular. All those memories had come back when they saw a film about the screen lothario and had discovered a club that catered to Latin dance soon after. “Let’s go to the Palladium and cut a rug, eh? Makes me think of all the old Biddies in my day who had just stopped thinkin’ the waltz was invented by the devil. If they could see dancin’ now there’d not be enough faintin’ couches to handle the shock.”

 

Spike twirled Dru through the door starting the dance before they even left the flat.

 

*** 

 

Spike downed another whiskey and moved away from the arguing, drunken demons also sitting at the bar. 

 

The Cedar Tavern on University Place in the Village had become his neighborhood watering hole. Well, it was for nearly everyone including the more human looking demons in the area. It drew a crowd of modern, rebellious poets and painters and the vibe reminded Spike of the good days in Paris before the war. Sit there long enough and someone was bound to start an interesting conversation or do something amusing.

 

Even some demons who showed their less than human traits seemed welcome or at least accepted. That was the beauty of New York City in a way, people mostly minded their own business. Things that happened, say a vampire having a bit of nosh, didn’t get so much as a notice. As for the odd appearance of some, well this was the age of Godzilla and other cautionary tales about nuclear fallout. Rumors of ghastly experiments by governments, science fiction films and the like made people more willing to turn a blind eye to the odd scaly skin or reptilian eye. 

 

The demon to Spike’s left was more than a bit looped and had begun to complain that demons should be represented in the UN. “Not like we’re a complete secret in the halls of power, not after the last war when so many of us took part.”

 

“But we went underground again right away, safer.” His friend had been trying to quiet him for the past hour. “I’m telling you that humans will never accept us. We come out and they’ll be hunting us in our homes, even the peaceful races. You need to shut the hell up Larry.”

 

“Okay, the bad ones maybe need to be exterminated… you know the Fyrals and Polgaras and Vampires.”

 

“Oy!” Spike slammed his shot glass down on the bar. 

 

“Present company excepted,” Larry amended. “Come on, Spike, you know most of your kind wouldn’t even want to fit in anyway.”

 

“Tossers,” Spike agreed. “Some of us are about more than blood and battle though.”

 

Buffy had to agree with him. Vampires and some other demon species didn’t play well with people as a rule. Still, something about Larry’s idea appealed to her. Maybe a place as small as Sunnydale could make that work. Some kind of council or group that could keep the peace, work out issues and help to reign in the troublemakers. She’d file that idea away to consider later.

 

“So,” Larry’s buddy tried to change the subject before other bar patrons could get wise. “You take your lady to see the new Cinerama film at the Broadway? I hear it’s a good one. Makes you feel like you’re on that roller coaster. My Sylvia got sick right there in the theater!”

 

Spike nodded. “Think they’re on to somethin’ there. Dru loved it, said she could almost taste the people in the picture it was so real.”

 

Spike’s slight slip was drowned out by Jack Kerouac who had begun to loudly start spouting his latest poetic ideas in an alcoholic slur of words. Spike hoped the bloke would pull himself out of the bottle long enough to finally make it in the world of literature. He had talent. Was a decent drinking mate too for that matter but it didn’t help with the writing in his case. Got him tossed out of more than one tavern too.

 

Larry’s friend leaned in and lowered his voice confidentially, “So you hear about that Slayer?”

 

Spike perked up but tried not to show too much interest. “Hear lot’s of things.”

 

“Girl used to come in here once in a while. Fancied herself something of a beatnik. Made her Watcher crazy.”

 

“Yeah?” Spike had no idea he was that close to another Slayer. He’d known she was in the city but didn’t know they frequented the same areas or had similar interests. “Chits usually drive ‘em round the bend eventually when they get a bit independent. You say she comes in here? Shame you haven’t pointed her out.”

 

“Said she used to. Name was Zoe something. They did that weird ‘kill the Slayer you don’t like’ ritual their Council thought up on her last December. The vampire they set her up with had been a Watcher, knew the tricks. Her own Watcher cooked up an idea to make sure the kid wouldn’t make it out alive. Faust even turned her! Imagine a vampire vampire-slayer! She took them both out then walked into the sun.”

 

“There’s a reason no vampire with half a brain turns a Slayer,” Spike rolled his eyes. “Idiot! Looks like I missed another one though. Sounds like she would have been worth a go too.”

 

“So you got plans to do some writing with your human buddies? I heard you talking poetry with them last week.”

 

“Maybe look into puttin’ somethin’ together for one of their poetry slams, not sure. Lookin’ into takin’ one of those new jets over to Rome first. Not plannin’ on stayin’ in Europe,” Spike shuddered. “Not good for her health even now. But you know how it is when the missus gets her mind set on somethin’ Says she left somethin’ important there durin’ the war and wants it back. Right obsessed about it she is.”

 

“Wow,” Larry was impressed. “I’d love to take a trip in one of those big birds!”

 

“Got seats that’ll let us have sleepin’ room. Can block the windows that way so no one gets wise ‘cause we start smokin’.” 

 

“Smart.”

 

“Can work around Mr. Sunshine but takes some thinkin’ and plannin’.”

 

Buffy had to give Spike that one. The sunshine had never deterred him one bit back in Sunnydale even before he got that ring she’d taken off of him.

 

“Have a good trip and can’t wait to hear the stories when you get back,” Larry clapped Spike on the shoulder and ordered up another round.

 

*** 

 

“You slept with the bloody Immortal again?” Spike was livid. They had arrived in Rome after an uneventful but luxurious flight only to discover that the real destination was the villa of the womanizing demon who had seduced Darla and Dru so many years before while having his minions busy torturing he and Angelus. Not one of Spikes favorite memories or demons.

 

“We weren’t together, my Spike, and ‘e’s ever so virile and large.” Dru’s eyes glazed over as the bile rose in Spike’s throat. 

 

“Don’t remind me.”

 

“Promised to take good care of Pricilla ‘e did but she needs to be with the rest and ‘ome with me.”

 

Spike looked dazed. “A doll? You dragged us across the Atlantic and to the grounds of the villa of the one demon I hate more than Angelus for a bleedin’ doll?” He growled. “Got plenty of others and I’ll shower you with more, Dru. Why didn’t you tell me what this very important thing you just had to retrieve was? Why the hell are we really here? You plannin’ to have a third party with the Git?”

 

Dru pushed out her lower lip. “You wouldn’t bring me if I’d said.”

 

“Damned right I wouldn’t. Couldn’t shake the dirt of Europe off my feet fast enough after that last disastrous trip over here.” Spike was pacing in agitation. “This takes the bloody cake it does!”

 

Dru put a placating hand on his arm stopping his rapid back and forth pacing. “I promise we don’t even ‘ave to see ‘im. I’ll ask Antonio to get Prissy for me and we can go.”

 

“And once his minion tells him you’re here and with me what makes you think he’ll just let us alone?”

 

Dru had already rapped on the door of the ostentatious villa. 

 

The minion who opened the door was dressed fit for an embassy ball. The Immortal loved to play at being royalty. “Ah! Miss Drusilla! So nice to see you again. The Master will be delighted.”

 

Spike poked his head over Dru’s shoulder. “The Master can keep his grubby hands off my woman. Just hand us the dolly and we’ll be on our merry way.”

 

The minion looked down his nose at Spike. “And you are?”

 

“I’m her soddin’ significant other, permanent significant other you Berk. Just give my lady her property and toddle off to your toad-licking duties.”

 

Antonio stiffened his back. “You, sir, are uncouth. Remain here and I shall inquire about my Master’s orders.”

 

The door slammed in their faces.

 

“Spike, you should be nice. Antonio is ever so nice when you are polite to ‘im. There could be tea and cakes.”

 

“Don’t want any bloody tea or cakes. Want nothin’ from this bastard.”

 

The door flew open and something that looked like a cross between a spider and a human dashed past the startled vampires with the Immortal in hot pursuit. “Stop him, Antonio, you fool!”

 

Spike didn’t know or care what the spider demon had done. The Immortal wanted it stopped so Spike decided it needed to be helped. His left fist knocked the Immortal arse over teakettle and the demon made good on his escape.

 

“You idiot,” The Immortal raged from his position on the ground. “That was a black widower demon. Bastard tried to eat me!”

 

“No accountin’ for taste I suppose,” Spike smirked. 

 

“I shall make you pay for this insolence, vampire.” The Immortal noticed Dru standing wide-eyed and still at Spike’s side. “Drusilla, mi amore! You look lovely.”

 

Somehow the bastard managed to look and sound suave even with a bloody lip and being splayed out on the flagstones. 

 

“Spike meant well, darling. I’m sure ‘e’ll apologize.”

 

“When hell freezes over.” Spike glared at the Casanova cozying up to Dru. There were those who believed that the Immortal might have actually been Casanova but Spike seriously doubted that bit of rubbish.

 

“Ah, there are no manners in this one. I seem to remember him. What can I do for you my lovely?”

 

Spike fumed as Dru simpered and nearly swooned at the feet of their reluctant host. The Immortal’s minions had been unable to capture the demon that Spike had helped to escape and the looks he had been giving Spike did not bode well. Their vendetta, it seemed, had only grown.

 

Doll returned, Spike finally got Dru away from the slimy Romeo and back to their hotel.

 

A scream from the adjoining room as they were packing for their return trip to the States drew his interest and Spike was startled to see the same spider demon about to eat a young half-demon girl. For reasons Spike would never be clear of he decided to intervene and convinced the Black Widower to let the girl go. The girl, named Pearl, declared Spike a hero and pledged to repay him one day for his rescue. ‘No harm in havin’ some favors owed I suppose.’

 

“I’m a soddin’ proper idiot,” Spike muttered as he returned to Dru. “Don’t know why I had to swoop in like that. Really need to get back to New York and a life that makes sense.”

 

The news that the Immortal was looking to exact revenge on Spike made a quick exit prudent and he and his lady, complete with the damned doll, were soon back on their way to the New World and the life they had built there.

 

*** 

 

Larry was all agog as Spike related his adventures in the Eternal City. “Like Rome, shame it’s not someplace I can go again until the Berk cools off a bit.”

 

Larry nodded. He’d never met the Immortal but had heard tales over the years. “Bad temper so I’ve heard.”

 

“Hothead and big ego.”

 

“Long memory too,” Larry nodded.

 

Spike settled back to listen to Ginsberg recite bits of something he was working on.

__

_I saw the best minds of my generation destroyed by madness, starving hysterical naked,_

_dragging themselves through the negro streets at dawn looking for an angry fix,_

_angelheaded hipsters burning for the ancient heavenly connection to the starry dynamo in the machinery of night,_

_who poverty and tatters and hollow-eyed and high sat up smoking in the supernatural darkness of cold-water flats floating across the tops of cities contemplating jazz,_

_who bared their brains to Heaven under the El and saw Mohammedan angels staggering on tenement roofs illuminated,_

_who passed through universities with radiant cool eyes hallucinating Arkansas and Blake-light tragedy among the scholars of war,_

_who were expelled from the academies for crazy & publishing obscene odes on the windows of the skull,_

_who cowered in unshaven rooms in underwear, burning their money in wastebaskets and listening to the Terror through the wall,_

_who got busted in their pubic beards returning through Laredo with a belt of marijuana for New York,_

_who ate fire in paint hotels or drank turpentine in Paradise Alley, death, or purgatoried their torsos night after night_

_with dreams, with drugs, with waking nightmares, alcohol and cock and endless balls..._

 

Spike thought the piece had lots of promise, it spoke to him, and it looked like it did to many of the modern generation listening in rapt attention. Spike was home.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The story of the Japanese after-hours club owner working for the FBI is based on a real person. The lady (I will withhold her name out of deep respect) was a close personal friend of my mother, in fact, she was her maid-of-honor when my mom married my father. Except for being landlady to Spike and Dru, the story is true and accurate. Her club was still in operation through the 1970s.
> 
> Redlining: In the United States and Canada, redlining was the systematic denial of various services to residents of specific, often racially associated, neighborhoods or communities, either directly or through the selective raising of prices or refusal to grant loans and mortgages.
> 
> Army- McCarthy hearings https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Army%E2%80%93McCarthy_hearings
> 
> https://youtu.be/N35IugBYH04 https://youtu.be/8llS0ZkLVGA 
> 
> Real 1950’s rock and roll rockabilly form the Lindy Hop https://youtu.be/Rf55gHK48VQ
> 
> Spanish Harlem https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/East_Harlem 
> 
> Cedar Tavern, Greenwich Village NYC https://ephemeralnewyork.wordpress.com/tag/cedar-tavern-1950s-legendary-greenwich-village-bars/ 
> 
> TV tube testing https://youtu.be/DjH1HBbOeoU https://youtu.be/j6quDzRr9y8 
> 
> Coronation of Queen Elizabeth II in 1953 a television breakthrough https://www.provideocoalition.com/television-firsts-surround-the-crowning-of-queen-elizabeth-ii-in-1953/ 
> 
> Japanese Internment Camps https://youtu.be/5ZLGj6BV1Os https://www.smithsonianmag.com/history/injustice-japanese-americans-internment-camps-resonates-strongly-180961422/
> 
> Automat https://youtu.be/ZrbyqUOObdU
> 
> Camel billboard Times Square https://youtu.be/Kls7DSyPalg 
> 
> GI Bill https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/G.I._Bill 
> 
> British nuclear test October 1952 in Australia https://youtu.be/yOwH55lnA8M 
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Operation_Hurricane
> 
> UN https://youtu.be/Zbv7RyxmNBA Clever overview done in 1945
> 
> A bit more background on the UN https://youtu.be/vWFiUX1wz9Q 
> 
> Argentinian tango from film “Valentino”, 1950 https://youtu.be/oFcraniRJH0 
> 
> Latin dance takes NYC at the Palladium Ballroom https://youtu.be/MHU-YyjnfS8 
> 
> Because it’s funny as hell… here’s a 1950 vid on “do’s and don’ts of dancing” https://youtu.be/C2oBQVRXn6k 
> 
> https://youtu.be/v92U2F9gbUo Pan Am 377 Stratocruiser and in flight https://youtu.be/XS6w8yvwH9s 
> 
> The Beats 1959 https://youtu.be/gR-qxHoL5Yk 
> 
> Look back to the Beat poets and writers https://youtu.be/XYitYHntLI4 
> 
> “Howl” (in its entirety) by Alan Ginsberg (beat poet): https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poems/49303/howl 
> 
> 1950s TV https://youtu.be/4wKlth2yTF8 
> 
> full episode of Topper https://youtu.be/_AhqLgNMUiI 
> 
> Various 50s TV shows in this playlist https://youtu.be/ZqbmnZ7sgZM 
> 
> Cinerama https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cinerama https://youtu.be/mtrwyvgvjBk (I have wonderful memories of several films seen in Cinerama at the Indiana Theater in Indianapolis Indiana in the very early 1960s. Including a showing of the re-released 1952 original This Is Cinerama) https://youtu.be/vrzjdlyZCD8 
> 
> Charlie Chaplin was denied reentry to USA during McCarthy anti-communism crusade https://www.theguardian.com/film/2014/sep/20/charlie-chaplin-readmission-ban-mccarthy-usa-1952


	36. Chapter 36

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [](https://imgur.com/ejfdAtQ)  
> 

Chapter 36

Spike chuckled as he refolded the letter and put it back in the envelope. “Looks like Nunzio’s still havin’ to work to keep Howl boy from tryin’ to get in his pants. Wants some company there in Paris. Figures I can help keep Ginsberg in line.”

Dru giggled. “Can’t make someone a catamite if they’re not born that way. Your poet friend should know by now that lovely Gregory will never love ‘im like that.”

“That’s why he’s askin’ us to come and be a diversion. He loves him but not like that and Allen just can't stop himself from tryin’. Nothin’ hurts quite like unrequited love. Can’t help but feel sorry for Ginsberg. Shame he didn’t have his sights on someone more interested.”

“So we’ll go to Paris then?” Dru didn’t know whether to feel hopeful or disappointed. When she wanted to go back to the old world Spike resisted but now that he got an invitation from one of his beatnik friends to come to France he was seriously considering it.

“Might. Europe’s cleanin’ up pretty well and we had a great time in Paris after the first war. Maybe some of the old crowd will still be around. ‘Sides I was thinkin’ of headin’ to Merry ‘Ole for a bit anyway. Haven’t been there since the four of us left to take the continent by storm.”

Dru frowned. Her memories of England were more bad than good and she hadn’t missed it one bit. “Why would you want us to go there?”

“Uncle George’s sprogs have done a fine job with the old firm. Made a regular fortune during the war… both of ‘em actually. Got a fine shipyard in Liverpool buildin’ some fine vessels.” Spike got regular business reports through the solicitor who handled his interests in the family business. Of course, he’d had to “die” and “inherit” every so many years. The system had worked well and Spike had mostly just banked and invested. “Current sprout in charge, Algernon, is a bit of a nit though,” Spike rolled his eyes. Maybe the boy’s dreadful name was the cause of his incompetence. Was enough to send anyone off their game! “Figure a visit from the mysterious foreign cousin might put him in a better frame of mind. Can’t let my father’s legacy be pissed away by an incompetent.”

Dru picked up Miss Edith and began to play with her hair nervously. “Will we go to London then?”

“Not plannin’ on it. Can do what’s needed there in Liverpool then we can see about sorting out the situation between Corso and Ginsberg before they cock up a good friendship. Make a bit of a holiday of it.”

*** 

Buffy couldn’t help but laugh as Spike put the fear of God into his distant cousin. The fellow had felt the wrath of Spike and never wanted to provoke it again. It had taken a few months to get things sorted and back on the right track.

“William is still in there and sharp as ever. Wonder why we never noticed that in Spike?”

It wasn’t all work though. There was always the music. Spike had discovered a promising band while occupying the nighttime hours. The Quarrymen were a talented skiffle band who were branching into rock and roll. The Conservation Club had many talented local acts but Spike was convinced these blokes had a shot at making it big. He’d had a chat with the young lad who was busy writing some of their original songs. The boy had quite the attitude and could be a bit of an ass but it was clear he was also quite talented. Three of the group were exceptional. The drummer, a nice lad named Pete Best, was perfectly adequate but didn’t seem to have the same drive as the others and Spike could imagine he’d be replaced before too long.

Spike had been the one to suggest young George Harrison to replace McCartney on the lead guitar and let Paul take on the bass. Paul and John were also really working well in co-writing new songs. They’d managed to get booked at the popular Cavern Club with the new lineup and emphasis on rock and roll finally setting aside the skiffle tunes and instruments. Spike had high hopes for the lads.

Dru found Liverpool to be drab and dull and she was more than ready to move on to Paris. She didn’t even tell Spike when the pixies whispered that there might be trouble there. After all, trouble was what made life interesting!

*** 

The Latin Quarter had become a magnet for the so-called beat generation. The flea-bag lodging house at 9 rue Gît-le-Coeur was home to Gregory Corso, Allen Ginsberg and his lover Peter Orlovsky and saw others like Jack Kerouac and William Burroughs come and go. 

Spike and Dru didn’t set up shop there preferring the more refined atmosphere of the Hotel d’Angleterre that had once been the British Embassy in the century before William, and even Edith had been born. 

Dru had refused to let Spike invite his friends to their hotel knowing that the next thing would be unwelcome guests escaping the squalor of their own quarters. ‘Smart girl Dru,’ Buffy nodded.

Buffy found the group amusing. She’s enjoyed their poetry and drunken revels back in New York in Greenwich Village and still could see the appeal. But, truth be told, they could be moochers and when too deep into the alcohol a bit more trouble than they were worth. In other words, just the sort of guys Spike loved to hang out with. In their favor, they encouraged his poetry and gave him the kind of constructive criticism his peers had never offered when shaming the shy young man who had dreamed of producing great literary works. 

Paris wasn’t the same carefree place it had been after the first world war. There was a difference between the Lost Generation of that time and the Beat Generation of this era too. They shared the avant-garde lifestyle and drew artists of all stripes but there the similarity ended. There was an edge of anger in the new group that replaced the cautious hope of the ones who had flocked to the cafes and galleries in the 1920s and 1930s. They all felt older and wiser. The myth of a “war to end all wars” had been consigned to the ash heap of WWII.

Still, Dru found her artists and Spike his poets and musicians and plenty of ways to appease every appetite, sate every need.

Buffy spotted the Immortal eyeing the vampire couple and could sense the old demon was calculating ways to pay Spike back for the incident in Rome a few years before. ‘Damn! Wish they could hear me. Why don’t Dru’s wacky pixies start yammering at her now when they need the heads-up?’

The gendarmes that loudly rapped on their hotel room door came as no surprise to Buffy but had clearly taken the vampires by surprise. It reminded Spike far too much of Berlin before their lives had gone to hell.

“Monsieur William Lamoureux I have orders to place you under arrest.”

“What ‘ave you done, my Spike?” Dru pulled her negligee closer around her body and blinked in surprise.

“Haven’t done a thing, pet. Likely a mistake we can sort quickly.” Spike looked around trying to decide if he should try to make a run for it or use his wits to get out of whatever nonsense this might involve. They had been careful not to kill any of their meals and none of them would have been able to identify him much less put a name to him that he hadn’t used since the last time he’d lived in Paris.

“What’s the charge?”

“Tax evasion. We have evidence that you lived and worked here for a number of years and paid not one sou in tax. There has been documentation of your years enjoying the pleasures of a citizen without contributing. The law has finally caught up to you.”

Spike was gobsmacked. He and Dru had lived openly in Paris even if under a false last name. They had forged papers that he had, unwisely it seemed, shown him to be a proper French citizen. Of course he’d paid no bloody tax! He hadn’t been a real citizen. That wasn’t likely to get him out of jail, however. More likely it would add to the list of charges. Spike wondered just who he had pissed off enough that they’d sicced the authorities on him.

“Madame Lamoureux you are not under arrest. Your great friend the Conte de Saint Germain has asked that I extend his invitation to stay in his villa while your husband is incarcerated.”

“The bloody Immortal!” Spike exploded. “Thinks he can pay off a few officials, fake some papers and steal my lady?” Spike glared at Dru. “Don’t you dare go skippin’ off to Rome with that rotter. I’ll settle this right quick and expect you to be here waitin’, I mean it Dru. I’m a patient man but this is non-negotiable.”

“My poor Spike. Spider-men must be paid for.”

The gendarme looked confused and a bit alarmed. “Perhaps Madame would be better with someone to see to her… needs?”

“I see to her needs. Not the slimy Italian woman stealer.” 

Spike was handcuffed and led away still yelling at Dru to be there when he sorted this travesty.

Buffy hoped she would stay. She didn’t think Spike would take it well having Dru disappear again after the last time.

*** 

The charges were going to stick. The bastard had good forgers in his employ and more friends in high places than any demon should ever have. 

Spike languished in his jail cell awaiting trial. He was fortunate that his cell had no direct sunlight and had begun to worry that his luck along that line might be running out. His legal advice had been good but not too hopeful. His friends had stood by him and even checked on Dru who had remained at the hotel. Spike held out no hope that she’d remain for too long nor that she’d be able to keep from doing something that would only make their situation worse. 

“Hey, Captain.” The welcome voice had a hint of laughter in it. “Not the best accommodations and you’ve had some pretty bad ones. Looks like you could use a friend.”

*** 

Somehow Sam had the cell door open and the two made a fast retreat headed towards a small boat waiting on the Seine. Dru and their belongings were already on board.

“Where did you come from Uncle Sam? Last I heard you were in Moscow not that I’m not glad to see you especially under the circumstances.”

“Well not as urgently needed there since Stalin finally wound up six feet under. You could say I’m between missions at the moment. Heard you were here and dropped by for a visit. Imagine my surprise to hear you were the guest of the French government. Thought you’d be ready to move on by now, stop loafing in that lush cell.”

*** 

The boat made a direct but lazy path vaguely towards the west and away from the officials in Paris who, by now, had to have realized their prisoner was on the lam.

“Thought you two were headed for the States?”

“Got there. Made a couple of trips back since, both big mistakes I suppose.”

Sam laughed. “You do find ways to get yourself in a pickle.”

Spike glared then laughed with him. It was good to have his friend back. “Been mostly in New York City. Got caught up with a group of poets and writers in the Village, nice enough bunch. They came to Paris and sent an invite. Had a bit of business this side of the pond so took them up on it. Made the mistake of stayin’ too long.”

“So… tax evasion?” Sam doubled over, his laughter turning into bubbling giggles. “You have GOT to be the only vampire in history with that crime on the books!”

“So says James Bond.”

“Point to you,” Sam conceded.

“Object lesson… careful who you piss off.”

“And point taken.”

“And you? Got some time floatin’ away from ‘gay Paree’, could use some entertainin’ tales and I’ll bet you're the man to tell ‘em.”

“Well, did my part in the USSR. Lots of misery there and plenty of bad players to feed off of. Extract a bit of justice for the common man they were supposed to be taking care of.” Sam sat and stretched his legs, settling in for a long coze. “Bastard was responsible for a minimum of seven million people and that’s without war. Heard some put the estimate to as high as twenty million if you can wrap your mind around that. Fucker just would NOT die! Like the stories about Rasputin. Bad heart, not healthy but kept on living and destroying lives everywhere.”

“Papers say he heart finally did him.”

Sam gave a toothy grin and his eyes flashed yellow. “That’s the official verdict, yeah.”

Spike smirked. “Why do I have a feelin’ there’s a bit more to the story then?”

“Let’s just suppose a certain vampire was at the same film screening and dinner. Maybe waited in the old despot's room for a bit of a friendly chat. Then suppose that vampire was a bit… what did you used to call it? Oh, yeah, peckish.” He smiled and shrugged. “Don’t imagine his doctors would want that listed as cause of death.”

Dru awakened from all their laughter. “Brother ate the nasty man,” she nodded.

“Ate a lot of nasty men, women too. World’s full of them it seems. Never realized that back in Duluth.”

“Nothin’ like death to open your eyes, eh?”

Buffy had to agree but it wasn’t death, it was time and enough not just to observe but to think and process. That was one thing vampires had if they chose to do it. “Maybe that’s part of why they don’t feel so bad about killing humans. Maybe it’s not because they don’t have souls but because they’ve seen that lots of humans with souls aren’t any better than demons. I’ve met people that, if I didn’t have a soul to tell me it’s wrong, I’d be okay seeing have a short life.”

She felt a deep twinge of guilt as she thought of some people she wouldn’t mourn meeting some fangs. “Problem is when they don’t keep it to the ones asking for it,” she sighed. “That’s my job, I guess. Lay down the laws and enforce them. Still, no killing though… that’s a bridge too far.”

She looked at Sam and wondered how true that was in his case though. In a way he was a soldier and killing is what they do and everyone's okay with it. “Damn! Even the grey areas have grey areas! Maybe that’s why we’re not gods. It’s exhausting trying to figure out what’s right sometimes.”

*** 

The boat put ashore near Marcilly sur Seine and the three vampires paid the pilot for the trip and his silence.

“So we partin’ ways again?” Spike looked like he hoped for a ‘no’ answer.

“Trying to get rid of me, Captain? This your version of ‘get off my submarine and don’t let the hatch hit you’?” The twinkle in his eyes showed he was merely teasing.

“Not at all. Stick around as long as you want. We’re family.” Spike resisted the urge to pull Lawson into a manly bear hug. “Meant to say thanks though. Wasn’t lookin’ too good for me back there.”

“Can’t let a good vamp down and still consider myself one of the good guys now can I” He slapped Spike on the back. “Your lady seems better. Can see some of her finer points now.”

Spike grinned. “Keep your eyes off her points, fine and not. May be my family but I’m a selfish bastard,” he teased back. “So, you check in on your girl yet?”

“Was thinking about doing that before I pick my next mission. I know Bernie would be good to her, he loved her as long as I did. Still, I wonder from time to time and would love to know for certain.”

“Even official sailors get shore leave. You’ve been at this close to twenty years now… you’re due.”

“Might do that. You?”

“Promised Dru a quick trip to Vienna before we head back. She has a yen for authentic sachertorte from a bakery she loved before the war. Maybe a waltz or two in the place of its birth while we’re at it. She put up with my interests back in Paris so that’ll be the next stop before headin’ back to the good old U. S. of A.”

“Might tag along then. Have a contact in the area who can fill me in on what Khrushev’s playing over in Cuba. Might be my next mission, that or Vietnam. Bit tired of Asia at the moment though. Korea was a shit hole assignment and it never officially ended. That Kim’s a wacko that can’t be trusted but he’s got the backing of the Soviets and China.”

“Lots of action in Africa too with all the colonies fightin’ for independence.” Spike reminded Sam of his other options. That was one thing about humanity… there was always a war somewhere.

“True, but I’m an American boy, have issues when it comes to colonies getting rid of foreign tyrants. Wouldn’t want to try to walk that minefield. Hard to know the good guys from the bad at times.”

“No shit!” Buffy nodded in full agreement.

“Not cut and dried native versus colonial overlord. Tribes are killing each other too. Think I’ll give it a hard pass and see if I can pick a less complicated battle.”

Buffy envied him having the option. ‘Poor Sam, if he picks Vietnam it’ll turn out to not be so cut and dried either,’ she thought sadly.

*** 

The trucker had been convivial enough as he gave them a lift all the way to Bern. Paris seemed far enough away for Spike to breathe a sigh of relief, if he had to breath that is. The driver spoke only French and a tiny bit of German so Sam and Spike had conversed in English for the most part.

“I swear there has to be some way to get back at that slimy bastard!”

Sam shook his head. “Not a great idea, Captain. No one does a vendetta as well as the Italians. You do a tit for his tat and before you know it you’re floating in the breeze. There are some things that are losing battles. Land wars in Asia or the Middle East for example.”

Spike shrugged. “Suppose you’re right. Not worth the effort. Sooner or later he’ll piss off the wrong demon and stop being immortal… tosser!”

Dru cuddled up closer, “Mummy’s ‘appy ‘er Spike isn’t going to waste ‘is time playing with the sexy Conte. Don’t want to go back to Italy.”

“Keep callin’ him sexy and I might change my mind,” Spike leaned over and kissed his beloved.

The driver dropped the trio off at the train depot and went on his merry way with never a clue that he had just shared his truck with three beings with a long history of taking lives. Then again the same could have been said of many a human hitch-hiker Buffy thought.

*** 

“Want to go with me, have my six?” Sam was preparing to meet with his informant. He was getting itchy looking for another cause to give him both the sustenance and the purpose that allowed him to feed his needs without any guilt.

“This guy dangerous then?”

“Double agent. Worked for the NKVD under Stalin but got sick of all the innocent lives being taken. Started slipping information to those trying to help the wretched. Still, someone who was any part of the secret police … well, let’s just say my mamma didn’t raise an idiot.”

Dru had been humming as she had wandered around the suite of the converted old mansion. Some of the older families hadn’t fared too well under the post-war government. Austria hadn’t been partitioned like Germany, nor fallen behind Churchill’s Iron Curtain. The four Allied powers had shared in governing the old nation finally leaving them to their own governance in 1955. During those years, many who had aided the Nazis found it impossible to resume their carefree lifestyles and some, like the former owners had moved away from their homeland selling what they needed to finance a better life elsewhere. This former home was now a luxurious apartment complex with a few suites offered for short term leasing. Dru had fallen in love with all the gilt and glitter. She’d developed a taste for the finer things after all her years with Angelus and Darla.

“Even if I don’t completely trust him, his information is usually on the money. If anyone will know what Khrushov is up to in Cuba it’ll be him.”

“Sounds like a plan then.” Spike looked at his lover who was looking out the window with an unfocused stare. Spike wondered what was going on in that confusing noodle of hers. “You want to come play spy, Dru?”

“Hum?” Dru turned back to the fellas. 

“Are you coming with us?”

“Think I want to pay a visit to some of my favorite places. ‘Aven’t been to Vienna in an age.”

“You be okay on your own?” Spike had been a bit nervous with Dru’s withdrawal that seemed to have begun almost as soon as they had crossed the border from Switzerland. She hadn’t been moody for quite a while and it made him uneasy. 

She smiled brightly. “I’ll be fine, darling. You go play soldier with little brother and don’t worry about me.”

"We’d better head out, Captain,” Sam looked at his watch. “Don’t want to spook the spook.” Lawson felt a bit of tension in his companion’s stance. “Everything okay?”

Spike blinked and turned a smiling face his direction. “Yeah. Just had a weird moment. People used to say it meant someone was walkin’ over my grave but since I’m not in it and not gonna have another one that’s a load of bollocks.” He shook it off. “Likely just too much history this part of the world. Be glad to get back stateside.”

*** 

“By the time I make my way to Havana it’ll be in the history books. Looks like JFK has a handle on this one.”

“So Vietnam then?”

“Looks like. Bit of a mess there but I can help protect our GI’s at least. Never was one for the politics behind the wars. In the end, it’s just about individual human beings and protecting those you see at least trying to do right. Those fellas over there don’t give a damn about Diem or Ho Chi Minh, likewise, lots of those poor farmers in the country itself probably don’t really care that much. They’re pawns on that big board… Mao is using them like he did in Korea, the USSR too for that matter. Pushing their ideology like a steamroller that rolls over the people they say they want to help. Still, the US has taken a side and mean well, at least the troops are my fellas. Works for my mission.”

“What about that shore leave?” Spike really didn’t want to have this unexpected reunion cut too short. Sam somehow made him feel better about himself, about life.

Sam grinned. “Reckon the war will still be going on if I take a side trip. Think your lady would like to see Duluth? Have to start there to see where Bernie and Jussi might have gone. Too many years to expect they’d still be in the old home town.”

“Never been to Minnesota. Sounds like a good idea.”

The demon who worked as a bell-hop at their hotel approached Spike, shaking with nerves. Vampires were volatile on a good day and more than a few killed the bearer of bad news. “Your lady, Mr. Spike, she’s in a bit of a jam,” he whispered.

Spike whirled on him causing him to back against the wall in fright. “Tell me.” It was not a request.

“Word has it she was having a bit of fun at a local orphanage, you know… vampire stuff. Anyway, word also has it there’s a group of those Watcher guys from the Slayers Council in town and they’re headed over there armed and determined.”

“When?” Spike felt his heart sink. He should have seen the signs! Dru had been too complacent for too long. It was bound to happen.

“Just moments ago.”

“Where is this orphanage,” Sam demanded.

After the demon sputtered out the directions the two vampires left in a blur that marked them as nearly invisible to the naked eye.

*** 

“It’s William the Bloody and his whore,” the younger Watcher yelled to his fellows in the midst of the chaos.

“He’ll dust like they all do, buck up man!” Roger Wyndam-Pryce stepped over the body of a middle-aged matron and grimaced as his foot slipped in the blood. ‘Why I have to deal with these two young pups under these circumstances is unconscionable.’

They had heard the alarm raised about the crazed woman killing in the orphanage and made the leap, correct it seemed, that the attack was demonic. What was there for a proper Watcher to do but step into the breach?

“Beware. The bitch is a crafty one for all her madness.”

Spike sidled up behind the younger Watcher, “Watch your tongue or I’ll pull it out like this,” as he made good on the demonstration with the screaming Watcher in his arms. “Respect my lady.”

Spike stalked towards Wyndam-Pryce menacingly, his eyes golden.

“Spike! So many lovely little babies,” Dru danced towards him and the danger presented by the Watcher.

“Stay back, Poodle, I’ve got this.”

Wyndam-Pryce might have stood his ground against one of these two notorious vampires but not both. He used the distraction of Dru’s appearance to make his way to safety not noticing the third vampire in the room as he raced towards the door. “Too late to save anyone anyway,” he consoled himself. “Massacre is already finished except for the clean-up.”

He’d lost his two companions to the wild vampiress and none of the inmates on this floor appeared to be alive. The proper authorities would have to check the other floors. He’d make his report and put out the word to seek out the monstrous pair before they continued their killing spree. The Council had a wet-works team nearby and they could finally put an end to them.

Spike and Sam grabbed Dru and bundled her out of the building through a back door. “Fucking, fuckery. Damn it all to hell, Dru! God, what a cock up” Spike didn’t know if he was more furious or terrified. There was no corner of Vienna that would be safe now. Bad enough she’d decided to take out a house filled with little kiddies but drew the attention of the bloody Watchers Council as well! “One hour. One bleedin’ hour and it all goes balls up.”

“What’s the plan, Captain?”

“We get the hell out of Austria. Bollocks, out of Europe. Council will be lookin’ to do us proper for this.”

“Feel like Vietnamese?”

Spike gave him a gimlet stare then shook his head. “Last thing Dru needs is another battlefield. Fuel the demon even more and it looks in high burn already. Damn, damn, damn.” He ran trembling fingers through his hair releasing some curls.

“I’ll see about transport. Don’t think the stuff-shirt got a clear look at me,” Sam offered.

Spike shoved Dru into the old warehouse and nodded. “We’ll wait here. Gonna have to knock her out.” Sam started to leave but Spike grabbed his arm. “Do me a favor, lad. See if you can get back to our hotel and collect her dollies or there’ll be no containin’ her once she wakes up. Maybe see if that demon bloke will ship them for us,” Spike pulled out a handful of cash. 

“Aye-aye.”

*** 

The flight from Vienna was dangerous but done with great stealth and care. The Council was out in full force and knew who to look for. 

Spike had grabbed a bottle of peroxide from the shelf of a drogerie in the first town they went through and now sported somewhat brittle white hair. It might help slow recognition. He didn’t dare lighten Dru’s raven locks, he’d had to listen to her rage about that years before! She was going to be hard enough to handle as it was. As for the haircut… well, hair would grow.

*** 

“Should be able to get a flight or a ship out of here headed somewhere, got a destination in mind?”

Spike looked around the streets of Hamburg and tried to collect his thoughts, come up with a plan. The bloody Council would be hot on their trail no matter where they chose to go. They’d be looking for a couple of vampires but wouldn’t have any problem adding a third to their sights if they did get wind of Sam. They needed a way to blend in, go somewhere unexpected.

Spike bit his lip then a handbill on the light post caught his eye and he grinned widely. “Got just the ticket! Sam… got some lads you should meet. Reckon they’d let us be part of their crew in return for a nice cushy flight back to London.”

*** 

The Star Club was packed. It was the last night this group would be performing and there was a lot of buzz that recordings were going to make the popular group superstars before too long. 

Spike inched his way towards the stage and caught the eye of the rhythm guitarist/singer who looked delighted to see their old friend. John motioned towards the backstage area and Spike went back to wait for their break. 

“Spike! Been a dog’s age man,” Lennon greeted him before Paul could pull him into a bear hug. The lads introduced Spike to their new members. They’d managed to nab the best drummer in Liverpool since Spike last hung out with them. Ringo was a right genius on the skins. 

“We almost didn’t come back to Hamburg,” Paul sobered. “Stu died here. You didn’t get to meet him. Was a great player. Had a brain hemorrhage right after he left the band. Stayed here with his girl instead of coming home. Only 21 too. We’re just a band of four now and I don’t think we’re going to replace him.”

“Too bad about that. I’ve tried to keep up with your successes. Heard great things. Laughed at the name change. You took my suggestion!”

“Yeah, we went with the Silver Beetles for a bit but kept coming back to your idea of spelling it Beatles as a nod to your poofy poetry friends. You still hanging with them?” John teased as if he wasn’t a poet himself.

“Parted ways a while back. Looking to go back to London for a bit.” He put on his best innocent face as if just having a brilliant idea. “You fellas want a free trip home in a bit of luxury. I’ve got a bit of dosh and can swing another four seats.”

“Could you make it five?” George asked. “Brian would be really gutted if we made him come on his own. Hate when he gets argy-bargy. Worse than me mum!”

Ringo jabbed him with an elbow, “ You’re mum’s never said a hard word to you ever mate and you know it!” He shook Spike’s hand. “Don’t know if you remember me. Played with Rory Storm and the Hurricanes last you were in Liverpool.”

“I do remember. Also told the boys you were one of the best drummers in the business and they’d be lucky to have you as more than a stand-in for Pete.”

Ringo stood straight and smiled. “Thanks, man.”

John laughed. “Let’s go get legless and talk about this luxury trip home, catch up some more. Got some lyrics to run by you since you’re here.”

“Sod it, let’s hit the pub then.”

The Council might be looking for a couple of vampires, but they weren’t looking for a promising British rock and roll band returning home with their road crew. London had never looked lovelier!

*** 

The group parted ways in good spirits at Heathrow. The boys heading back to Liverpool while Spike, Sam and a subdued Dru scoured the international flights for the first plane to anywhere in the USA. 

“Chicago’s not that far from Duluth. Looks like fate’s on our side for once,” Sam commented.

“Think we might have lost the hounds too. If we lay low they might not get wind of where we went and eventually have bigger fish to fry. Always someone out there waiting to muck up the world, get their full attention.” Spike took a deep breath and began to have some hope that things would work out in their favor at long last.

*** 

“Chillicothe?” Sam looked bemused. “Well, Bernie did say he thought he might go back to life on a farm. Still want to join me on my shore leave?”

Spike shrugged. “Sounds fine to me. Bit of fresh country air might be just the thing.” He looked at Dru and his heart broke again.

As was often the case after the demon had driven her off a cliff she had been quiet and remorseful. “The pretty babies always die, my Spike.”

“That’s ‘cause you keep killin’ ‘em pet,” he’d snapped making her cry to his chagrin. Spike was half convinced that Dru’s madness was a lot like wires not connecting properly. The human, loving, woman she once was found herself attracted to the wee ones. She wanted to play and pet them. Then the demon would shove into the driver’s seat and it would be a bloodbath. Then Miss Edith would go on about how her little sisters had died and how evil she was and Dru would be in a blue funk for ages until she snapped out of it.

Sam gestured towards the silent Dru, “Will she be alright?”

“Yeah, still a bit barmy but on the mend. Got more than a few decades of experience dealin’ with it. Bastard daddy of hers!”

“Don’t have to sell me on that one, sport.”

“Alright then. Off to the fields of Chillicothe then. Sounds like it should be the title of a poem there.”

*** 

The farm was not too far outside of the small town of Chillicothe. When they arrived it was close to sundown but not yet vampire friendly. The three of them took shelter under a copse of trees and waited for the sun to go below the horizon. 

“Gonna try to talk to her?”

“No. Don’t want to disrupt her life. I know Bernie. He will have been a good husband to her. I just want a look, that’s all. The life that might have been mine, you know.” Sam swallowed the lump in his throat. “Might try to speak to Bernie, might not. Don’t want to upset Jussie though.”

Buffy was on pins and needles. She’d been to this farm several times when she was very young and remembered her mother showing her around with a wistful voice. She had a happy childhood here. 

Buffy barely remembered her grandparents but did remember the warm feelings she had when the flash of memory did make itself known. They had been good, decent, people who had loved Buffy completely.

Her Aunt Arlene now lived on the farm with her husband and family but Buffy hadn’t been back there since Celia, her cousin, had died. 

Buffy’s thoughts were abruptly interrupted by a flash of blonde hair as a giggling girl in overalls came barreling out of the house in a mad dash down the lane towards the road.

“Mom? Mom!” Buffy looked at the little girl, maybe five or six years old, as she ran down the driveway eyes fixed ahead and not noticing the three vampires in the shadows or anything else. 

“Buffy!” Little Joyce yelled and dashed into the street without a glance much to Buffy’s horror.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Cavern Club https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Cavern_Club and  
> Quarrymen (Beatles) https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Quarrymen https://youtu.be/LWBS6Lq0Vnk Skiffle music https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Skiffle https://youtu.be/5FZNQtJppJ4 https://youtu.be/RuuOAA9ekbg 
> 
> https://www.hotel-dangleterre.com/ Official website Paris hotel  
> Corso’s place in Paris https://www.messynessychic.com/2019/06/21/inside-the-beat-hotel-of-paris/ 
> 
> Lamoureux translates to lover. I could see Spike choosing that as an AKA out of whimsy.
> 
> The orphanage slaughter comes from the episode ‘Lineage’ Angel, S5 when cyborg Roger Wyndam-Pryce accosts ghost Spike and reminds him of seeing him there. Written by Drew Goddard, no dialogue from that episode is used here merely the incident told my way.
> 
> Deaths in USSR under Stalin https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Excess_mortality_in_the_Soviet_Union_under_Joseph_Stalin https://youtu.be/87KQfyLFhDU (just a taste. Part of a 5 part series)  
> Stalin’s funeral https://youtu.be/8IY6tGYJcOo  
> USSR under Stalin https://youtu.be/WbwWn0m03lM  
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/NKVD Stalin’s secret police
> 
> Eastern Europe under Soviet control https://www.cs.hmc.edu/~kknudtzo/portfolio/papers/EastEurope.html  
> https://news.stanford.edu/2010/09/23/naimark-stalin-genocide-092310/
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Allied-occupied_Austria After Austrian promises of perpetual neutrality, Austria was accorded full independence on 15 May 1955 and the last occupation troops left on 25 October that year.
> 
> https://www.history.com/topics/cold-war/cuban-missile-crisis
> 
> Beatles at the Star club, Hamburg, Germany 1962 https://youtu.be/4JhKYwHyoYU 
> 
> The Quarrymen became The Silver Beetles for a while until Lennon decided to change the name to "the Beatles", from the word beat. As a member of the group when it was a five-piece band, Sutcliffe is one of several people sometimes referred to as the "Fifth Beatle." The original lineup of the Beatles, John Lennon, Paul McCartney, George Harrison, Stuart Sutcliffe and Pete Best regularly performed at different clubs in Hamburg, West Germany, during the period from August 1960 to December 1962; a chapter in the group's history which honed their performance skills, widened their reputation, and led to their first recording, which brought them to the attention of Brian Epstein. During their period in Hamburg, Sutcliffe decided to leave the group to continue his studies. In April 1962, less than a year after leaving the group, he suffered a brain hemorrhage and died as a result. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stuart_Sutcliffe  
> https://ultimateclassicrock.com/ringo-starr-first-beatles-show/  
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Beatles_in_Hamburg
> 
> Cuban missile crisis https://www.history.com/topics/cold-war/cuban-missile-crisis  
> https://youtu.be/qJbBQi02Rrs 
> 
> African independence movements 1960s https://youtu.be/CgzSnZidGuU  
> Lots of great documentaries on the Korean war and the Vietnam war on Youtube but here are a couple if you want to explore more Korea https://youtu.be/DoSRwmuVYyI Vietnam https://youtu.be/iXJR_Ok-QbA 
> 
> Chillicothe https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chillicothe,_Illinois  
> A look around Chillicothe https://youtu.be/8QP1rvuAKrc


	37. Chapter 37

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [](https://imgur.com/a5Ynd8a)
> 
> Just a sweet (I hope) interlude.

Chapter 37 

 

Everything was a blur! The urgent sound of a trucks horn blasting, the deep scream of a terrified man, three male figures at a full run towards the impending disaster all blended together. 

 

One child versus a solid 1950s era pickup truck was no contest. Fortunately for this small girl, there was supernatural intervention.

 

Buffy knew intellectually that her mom couldn’t have been killed in a hit and run and still have been around to be her mom. Then again who knew why she was suddenly a ghost decades ago. Maybe something drastic had changed and she was now witness to it. She was frozen in fear.

 

The sound of the little girl whimpering, “I’m sorry daddy. I didn’t look,” broke Buffy from her inertia.

 

Young Joyce was safely cradled in Spike’s arms. He and Sam looked exactly like they’d been hit by a truck, which they had.

 

Bernie got to the country lane just as the rescue took place. His eyes were focused on his child and he looked as pale as the two vampires who had just saved the day.

 

He reached out for his crying daughter who was holding her arms out for the comfort of her daddy.

 

“Oh, daddy! I’m so sorry,” she sniffled. “I saw the Morrisons get home and wanted to show Elizabuff my new Barbie.” Joyce looked in sadness at the mangled doll. “I didn’t look.” She began to wail as the full realization of what had nearly happened set in.

 

“I don’t know how to thank you,” Bernie looked at the two men at last. Sam had his back turned so his face wasn’t visible.

 

Seeing the two fellas in their dark suits, Bernie figured they were a couple of those Mormon fellas who’d been coming around lately or maybe Jehovah’s Witnesses. Hell, they’d just saved his little girl. He’d invite them in and even listen to their spiel. He owed them that much at least.

 

“Why don’t you two heroes come on up to the house, get some of that road dirt off of you and have a cold brew… or… iced tea… or whatever you drink… lemonade?”

 

Dru put in an appearance at that point, “Blood?”

 

“What’s that?” Bernie was pretty sure he was in shock seeing that he was hearing strange things. Maybe the lady was noticing an injury on one of her companions.

 

Spike was steering Dru towards their car. “Not now, Dru. The nice man and his kiddies are completely off the menu and I mean it,” he whispered.

 

“Not going to eat ‘im or the wee ones. They’re little brothers family.” She narrowed her eyes as she looked at Joyce.

 

Dru tilted her head and her gaze became unfocused and distant for a moment. “Yours too, my Knight, but not yet.” She glared in Buffy’s direction. “No family for Princess though,” she whispered in a sad, lost, voice.

 

Spike looked confused but also relieved as well. It looked like Dru was going to play nice at least. “Watch what you say then. Don’t wanna bugger things up for Sam,” he cautioned. “These folks mean everything to him.”

 

“I’ll be ever so gracious. A perfect Princess.” Dru vowed.

 

Sam looked desperately at the car and tried to figure out how to get away before Bernie took notice of him. Too late.

 

“Sam?” Bernie nearly dropped Joyce. “How the hell is that you, Bud? We got word you were KIA in ‘43. Jussie cried for over a year, still has her moments. Your ma passed away just after she got the news, broke her heart.”

 

‘Damn! Didn’t mean to kill my mother,’ Sam gulped back a sob. ‘Maybe I should have gone to see her, explain… yeah, explain how?’

 

“Long story,” Spike tried to offer a lifeline. “Bernie isn’t it?”

 

Bernie couldn’t take his eyes off of Sam. ‘Hasn’t aged a day!’

 

Finally, he shook the hand Spike offered. “Yes, Bernie Erickson. I take it you’re a friend of Bud here?”

 

“Spike. If by Bud you mean Sam here… yeah, we’re friends. Could say we served together.”

 

Sam found his voice and blurted out the first thing his panic addled mind had come up with. “Had to let them list me as a casualty and stay incognito, Bernie. CIA stuff, top secret, need to know… that kind of thing.”

 

Spike wanted to guffaw but instead bit his lip and raised a brow. ‘Not too bad a lie if we leave right now.’

 

“Maybe better if we don’t come up to the house. Have to swear you to secrecy. Hadn’t meant on a meeting and don’t want to upset Jussie. Only planned to have a look, see if you all were okay.”

 

“Jussie’s not home. Took the baby, that’d be Charlotte, over to Peoria to the Pediatrician. Bad case of colic. Haven’t had much sleep in a week!”

 

“Lolly’s sick,” Joyce nodded.

 

“You just saved my Joycie, Bud, not to mention being back from the dead. Can’t just let you go now without a clean up and a meal, drink at least. If I’m sworn to secrecy, might as well add a little visit.” Bernie pulled Sam into a manly hug. “Missed you, Bud. You don’t know!”

 

“Missed you too.” Sam looked near tears.

 

“Just me, Joyce and her big sis Arlene home for a few hours at least. Juss got the last appointment at the Doctors and its a fair drive from the city. Suns just down so I don’t expect them back for a while. She’ll probably stop at a diner to get a bite knowing I’ve fed the girls.” He motioned to the house, “Please, come in for a bit. My little girl saved and my best friend back from the dead. Two miracles call for at least a drink.”

 

Sam knew he shouldn’t but couldn’t resist. He was HOME and big empties inside were getting filled. A vampire has more than one kind of hunger.

 

*** 

 

Dru returned from the car carrying two dolls from her collection. She presented Shirley Temple to Joyce and a blindfolded Patsy Anne to Arlene much to the girls' delight. “You must be mindful. They can be very naughty, but a good mummy is firm.”

 

Joyce squeezed the doll to her chest. “Oh thank you! My bestest friend Buffy will be so jealous! Elizabuff only gets new dollies on Christmas or her birfday.”

 

Buffy’s face scrunched painfully. “I had to get teased for most of my life for my name and it turns out I got it because my mom couldn’t pronounce her best friends name? How is that fair?”

 

As she watched Dru set up the small table for a tea party with the girls and their new dollies she had to smile. “Mom still has that Shirley Temple doll. She never would let me play with it growing up. Who would have believed she got it from Dru?”

 

“I can’t wait to show Buffy my two new dolls,” Joyce beamed. “Barbie’s kind of banged up but still, Buffy only has a Midge doll with all those fweckles.”

 

“This Buffy can’t wait to get back and tease mom mercilessly about that lisp.” She giggled, “Make up for all the abuse I’ve had over my name. I guess it could have been worse, I could have been Elizabuff.”

 

Spike was keeping an eye on Dru’s play while Sam and Bernie chatted. She had promised to behave and it seemed she was going to manage to do just that. Still, he wasn’t about to let disaster ruin what was turning out to be an enjoyable interlude with Sam’s loved ones.

 

“So farm living, eh?”

 

“I tried, Bud. Had a decent job at Fitgers brewery but it was just killing me slowly. Cooped up in a hot, smelly, factory then going home dog tired…. That’s not living. I needed to be back with nature. I’d rather grow the hops, barley, and wheat than cook and ferment it.” He handed another bottle to Sam. “Don’t mind drinking a few either,” he grinned.

 

They clinked bottles and chuckled. The affection between the two men was obvious.

 

“Now, how about you, Bud. Not the malarkey you tried to lay on me before either, the straight dope. I’ve known you since we were both in diapers, you still can’t lie for shit.” He sat forward in his chair and leveled a stern look at his old friend. “It’s been a good twenty years and you don’t look a day older. That ain’t the result of being in the CIA. I’m a simple farmer but not an idiot.” His voice dropped to a whisper and he glanced at Spike to see if the other man was listening in. “You like that comic Captain America? Government experiment or something like that?”

 

“That’s fiction, Bernie.” Sam insisted.

 

“And you’re real. Don’t give me any cockamamie story. You say I need to keep your secret and I’m fine with that. You know I’ll take it to my grave but I deserve the honest truth of that secret don’t you think?”

 

“Doubt you’d believe me,” Sam squirmed in his chair.

 

“Try me.”

 

“Look…” Sam sighed deeply. “First of all, you’re safe. No one here is going to hurt you or yours. I swear it.” He looked at Spike then towards Dru. Spike nodded in reply to Sam’s unspoken question.

 

“This call for another beer?”

 

“Maybe better without.” Sam took a big breath before his bigger leap. “Remember before the war when we’d slip off to see the movies when we were supposed to be in one of our more boring classes?”

 

Bernie nodded and smiled fondly.

 

“Remember those Universal horror movies with Lon Chaney?”

 

Bernie looked confused. Sam had made it clear that comic book explanations were far-out fiction but now he was talking Bride of Frankenstein. He could tell from Sam’s face that he wasn’t pulling his leg either. “Go on.”

 

“Well, not so much with the fiction turns out. Well, Dracula isn’t much like the way they played him. He’s a lot more flamboyant and kind of fun actually. Pretty crap at cards though. He has a massive tell when bluffing.”

 

Spike grinned and added, “Little tic on the left side. Won plenty off him thanks to that. Still owes me eleven quid though.”

 

Bernie stared at Sam as if he’d just grown a second head and tried to take in the implications. “He’s real?”

 

“As real as I am.”

 

“So you’re saying Dracula made you into a vampire?”

 

“Not Dracula. Some bastard named Angelus.”

 

Bernie looked at his three visitors with a bit of fear and a lot of nervousness. “You’re all vampires?”

 

Spike looked at Dru who was actually being helpful by keeping the two little girls so occupied they weren’t hearing or noticing the adults talking.

 

“Got it in one,” Spike admitted and slipped into game face. 

 

Bernie looked terrified and silence descended. He looked back and forth from Sam, who had also displayed his fangs and bumpies, to Spike then watched as both reverted to their human guise. 

 

“Well, Bud, think you might have just made me piss my pants.” Seeing Sam’s sad face he quickly shook off his look of horror. “Not really but probably a good thing I didn’t have that other beer.”

 

“Suppose you’ll want us to leave right away,” Sam muttered as he started to get up.

 

“No! Wait,” Bernie gulped. He looked over where his little girls were giggling at the woman who was animatedly talking to their dolls as if they were having a real conversation then back at the two men… vampires… who had saved his Joycie’s life and made his decision to trust. “You said you weren’t a threat to us, right?”

 

“That’s right.”

 

“You don’t drink blood?”

 

“Course we do!” Spike shook his head. “That’s pretty much the basic truth in all vampires myths and reality.”

 

“But you won’t drink ours?”

 

“You offerin?” Spike grinned in mischief. Bernie paled as Spike’s eyes twinkled with mirth.

 

“NO!”

 

“Didn’t think so.”

 

“So you only drink if it’s offered?”

 

Sam sighed and began to explain in as little detail as he could get away with. He told how and when he had been turned and basic facts about vampires including the advice to never invite anyone in after dark. It was a long conversation and Bernie hung on every word.

 

*** 

 

“Far as I’m concerned,” Bernie said at the end of the tale, “You’re still the best friend I ever had. You’re still Bud but I can see that you can’t hang around and be here. Understand why you didn’t come home.” He teared up. “Must’ve been hell for you!”

 

“One day at a time. Helped to have a mission.”

 

“Yeah, about that. Can’t say I disapprove of how you’ve decided to take care of your… er, dietary needs. Good for you. You’re still a patriotic hero in my mind.”

 

Sam would have blushed if he could. “Thanks. Making the best of a bad situation’s all. Not a hero but just trying to make choices I can live with.”

 

“So... no aging?”

 

Sam laughed. “Nope.”

 

“Huh! Don’t know whether I should be jealous or feel sorry for you. Hell of a thing living forever I’d guess. Lots of plusses but a shit-load of minuses too.” Bernie shook his head. “Think it’s a good thing you don’t want Jussie knowing. Actually, the whole secrecy thing makes perfect sense. Too dangerous for you if word got out. No one’ll hear a thing from me and you know I’m good for my word.”

 

Sam nodded. “I do.”

 

Bernie looked over at Spike. “Hell! Here I am offering you Jussie’s fried chicken and beers and that’s not what you need at all!”

 

Spike laughed, “Ate it though. Tasted just fine. Beer’s not too terrible for bein’ American.”

 

“Wait here,” Bernie said and went out the back door.

 

***

 

Dru’s head snapped up at the smell of hot blood.

 

Bernie was carrying a milking bucket with him. “I know it’s not human but maybe it’ll be tasty and work for you.”

 

Spike’s eyebrows both went up. The fellow had evidently taken a fair amount of blood from his dairy cows to offer to them by his own free will! No human had ever done something like that for him, even if it was mostly because of his affection for Sam. Spike felt his eyes well up. Kindness offered was so foreign and worth the treasures of a small kingdom.

 

Buffy also felt her eyes tear up. “I’m so proud of my Grandpa. Such a good man! I’m so lucky to get to see him like this.” He had died when Buffy was quite small, too young to fully appreciate him. 

 

“How about I put the girls to bed and you three help yourselves… if it’s good enough that is?”

 

“Damn, Bernie, you always were the best there is. Thanks, you didn’t have to do that.”

 

“Sure I did. My friend is probably hungry and his friend who saved my girl too not to mention his ladyfriend. What kind of person would I be to not provide a small meal at least?”

 

*** 

Buffy hated leaving the farm and her family as much as Spike hated parting ways with Sam once again.

 

“So … Vietnam?”

 

“Seems like. You?”

 

“Got a yen to check out Detroit. Lots of great music coming out of there if you can believe it.”

 

“Should have known you’d be following the music. At least it makes tracking you down easy. If it’s not the tunes it’ll be the words.”

 

“Like you and your wars I suppose.”

 

“Make an odd pair don’t we?”

 

Dru had fallen asleep with a rather sweet smile on her face. She’d enjoyed the games with the girls and this time didn’t have the grief that came when the demon hijacking her good times.

 

“Gonna be a rough one,” Spike cautioned.

 

“Aren’t they all? Still, maybe some young kids mom won’t have to bury him in some flag-draped coffin if I’m there to do my part.” Sam thought of his own mother and how she must have grieved his passing.

 

Spike knew where Sam’s mind had gone without a word. “Mate, she loved you. Likely would have passed by now anyway. Wasn’t your fault. You WERE killed in action, it was no lie.”

 

Sam turned sad eyes on his friend, “Thanks but we both know she was expecting to see me there once she left. Never going to now.”

 

“Who knows? If any vamp makes it through those pearly gates my money’s on you. You’ve tried to do right from the start. Don’t know any others like you.”

 

Sam shrugged. “Fight the good fight and hope for the best I guess. I’m lucky I still have good friends. Bernie’s a treasure but can’t be part of my life now. Glad I have you, Captain.”

 

Spike blinked and couldn’t get the words out past the lump in his throat for a while. “That you do. Don’t be a stranger. Keep in touch and watch your back. No dustin’ before we’re old enough to beat out Methuselah.”

 

“Sounds like a plan.” Sam pulled his collar up against the breeze. “Tell Dru it was a pleasure to finally really meet her.”

 

“Sorry you didn’t get to see your gal,” Spike commiserated. 

 

“She’s Bernie’s gal now. That’s the way it should be. Couldn’t want better for her.”

 

Sam got halfway down the stairs then turned to toss out one last comment, “Don’t forget to pay your taxes. Can’t be making a career out of breaking you out of jail!”

 

***

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Life on a farm in the 60s https://youtu.be/M2JM7jxmMZ4 
> 
> A farmers perspective https://youtu.be/nc1VCP2bUuo 
> 
> Playlist Doll TV ads from the 1960shttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uZ8aFFaDxdo&list=PL2XRHFh7-RK_O6KkUQQfNQi4Zy_rXhF87 Warning some are pretty creepy! I still have my Chatty Cathy. Sadly I do not have my 1959 Barbie. Fun trivia item… Barbie and Ken were named for their creator’s two children so they were siblings. Kind of makes all those “dating and romance” play between them bit icky LOL
> 
> Some 1960s music to set the mood https://youtu.be/AWdwtDJ8VLk 
> 
> Early 60s America https://youtu.be/WYcgU2Y6U6g 
> 
> Lovely look at the decade good and bad https://youtu.be/mUc2eLe-ruI 
> 
> Where our vampires are headed now that this interlude has ended:
> 
> A look at the Vietnam War https://youtu.be/iXJR_Ok-QbA 
> 
> Detroit in the mid 60s https://youtu.be/MYrCtWIJ1jY 
> 
> How Motown began (short Oprah vid) https://youtu.be/LOMEnykYvck 
> 
> Motown memories as only Smokey Robinson could tell them https://youtu.be/9WdZ3rQCiwk (after the plug for his products LOL)


	38. Chapter 38

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [](https://imgur.com/VWjurSX)  
> 
> 
>  
> 
> The Slayer in this chapter is my own creation.
> 
> Life is amazingly ironic. When you read this chapter you might think current events have shaped or heavily influenced some of the content. Sadly that is not so. This chapter takes place in the turbulent 1960s in the USA. The rhetoric and issues that seemed part of history have revealed themselves as once more being current events. I suppose the old adage that ‘those who ignore history are doomed to repeat it’ is more accurate than we might want to believe.

Chapter 38

As much as Spike missed the best friend he’d ever had it made the family dynamic easier. With Sam gone, Spike wasn’t torn between what Dru needed and demanded and what Lawson expected of him. Dru wanted the demon, Sam the man. Spike had a foot in both worlds and it often felt like he would fall into the abyss before it was all said and done.

Now the only careful dancing he had to do was to be demon enough to please Dru yet keep her from her absolute worst instincts that were guaranteed to bring final death and destruction on them both sooner or later. Innocents would be back on the menu but he’d steer her towards the mutton and sheep and away from the lambs. 

“Well, my lovely,” Spike cooed, “You’re a wee bit older than I would have thought to want. Still, you are perfect in every way.” He ran a loving hand over his prize. “Solid you are, and strong as a bloody tank! We’re gonna have a real good time.”

Spike tucked the previous owner of the shiny well-kept Fireflite into its spacious boot and then slipped behind the wheel. The beauty could go from zero to 60 in about 10 seconds and purred like a contented jungle cat. 

The late owner would be driving away safe and clueless had Sam still been with them. He’d been a nice enough bloke who had given the couple a lift and regaled them with cheerful stories about life in Detroit before the plants had started closing down. Folks were having to struggle as jobs dried up that had been seen as the ticket to a secure future only a few years previously. 

He’d been proud of the car he had helped to build and finally had been able to afford even if used. Spike felt a twinge as he remembered having made a meal of him but vowed to treasure his car as much as he had. ‘Not that the poor bugger would think it a fair trade-off.’ Dru had been pleased. They had feasted on an appropriate victim and had a new shiny toy in the aftermath.

“Spike, we are vampires. You forget that sometimes I think.” Dru tsked. “I’m the one they call mad but you’re the one who doesn’t know who ‘e is. Let mummy remind you, make it all better.” She had cooed and cajoled and he had capitulated. “We’re not ‘ouse cats, we’re lions made to hunt and rip and tear.”

He had insisted on dropping the body in a place where it could be found and claimed by his family. It was literally the least they could do after all. That tiny bit would have to appease the sad William within.

Spike ran a fond hand over the chrome and bit his lip. Dru was right, they were vampires when all was said and done. He might enjoy human company and culture but push comes to shove and they were demons. ‘Still don’t have to fall full into bein’ a monster. Just be demon enough to keep the missus happy.’ He wasn’t sure just who he was trying to convince with that caveat.

The times seemed perfect for indulging the evil desires of the demon without making Dru lose all control. Unrest was on every horizon stirring up the darker undercurrents that were always there under the surface in both vampires. It wasn’t nearly as bad as Europe during the war but the hum and vibration stimulated the desire for more than a bit of mayhem.

After the assassination of JFK and the movement to grant civil rights to people long oppressed the mood was tense among humankind as well the demons. Old hatreds and resentments that had been oft times unconscious were bubbling up. Job insecurity and looming poverty were bringing out fear-based resentments as people began to worry about having to share their pie with more people and possibly going without for themselves. 

Fear was enticing to demons and many fed on it. It was also enticing to more than one politician who used it to feed their base, increase their power and manipulate people into acts they might not otherwise choose.

People took to the streets marching for everything from Civil rights to Women’s liberation to protests against the war in Vietnam. Flower power and Black Power and just plain old fashioned establishment power all collided with greater frequency every day as summer heated up. 

‘Wonder how Sam’s doing over there,’ Buffy had to wonder. Like most of the guys who had signed up, he was coming from the standpoint of patriotism and righteousness like what had fueled the recruits in WWII but Vietnam was another beast altogether and the motives far murkier than the big war had been. Guys were coming back disillusioned and often depressed.

The draft was seen in some quarters as a tool to clear out the ghettos, “solve” the unemployment and poverty issues. Not everyone who found themselves in uniform were volunteers after all. The idea of refusing to serve roused anger in the hearts of those who saw refusal as cowardice or treason. Those anti-war marches almost always ended in violence of some kind.

The only humor Buffy had found in the whole mess was watching Spike frantically trying to put out the spreading fire in their nest before it consumed them both. “Damn it, Dru, why the hell are you playin’ with fire? We’re hold up in a bloody wooden warehouse, not exactly fire-friendly.”

“I was burning my bra in solidarity to my sisters,” Dru pouted. “Women need to stand together and stop being pushed in some corner.”

“Yeah, and I’m completely on board with that, Ducks. But can’t you find a less deadly way of showin’ where you stand? Maybe eat a chauvinistic pig or six, plenty of them to cull out.”

He stomped out the last of the embers and looked nervously at the new gaps in their shelter. “Maybe we need to find another place to call home while we’re at it.”

*** 

Fire was everywhere! Detroit was burning and Spike had pretty well given up keeping Dru home in their newer digs. 

It had been brewing for years really. The black population had dealt with being singled out by the largely white police force. With the Civil rights movement encouraging the idea that all citizens should be equal under the law in more than just lip service it was a situation just waiting on the right match. That match hit the combustibles in the early hours as police raided the Blind Pig, an after-hours unlicensed bar on the west side of town. Within hours it was a city-wide disaster that went on for days.

People who had proudly marched with Dr. King just a few years earlier in his ‘Walk to Freedom’ march calling for civil rights in a show of peaceful resistance now, feeling under attack, returned blow for blow. Detroit was dealing with demons of their own and they were once more the humankind. 

Hell by the mid 60s Mississippi wasn’t the only place burning! By the end of the long hot summer of 1967, there had been 159 different riots all across the USA. Even Dru’s demon was satisfied at the banquet.

“Callin’ this year the summer of love out west, pet. All those hippies and yippies with their ‘make love not war’ and holdin’ love in’s. Seems like the whole country’s manic-depressive at the mo. Pro-rights and equality and anti-pretty much everythin’ that is already in place gets ‘em all out in the streets and in each other’s face.” 

The blood was running hot in all quarters and the type of damage a pair of vampires could do went unnoticed. 

*** 

“So, brother Clarence,” Spike smirked at the strangely calm man. “Little girl gonna come home to sing again soon?”

“Don’t know. Aretha’s pretty busy. Why? You plannin’ on hanging outside the church to listen?”

Spike laughed. “Caught on to that did you?” The minister smiled. “Not like I can just come in and take a pew.”

“God turns no-one away, son.”

“Not repentin’ and I think that’s one of the requirements innit?”

“That it is. Seems that an evil soul doesn’t keep you from enjoyin’ some good gospel though. Maybe there’s hope for you before you finally leave this world. You seem a smart enough fella to at least try to hedge your bets.”

“Think that’s a done deal, Rev. Still, glad your little songbird’s made it big. Great set of pipes there.”

“God gifted her and blessed her plenty that’s for sure.”

Spike wasn’t sure how he’s found himself a chat buddy with the pastor of the New Bethel Baptist church. He’d been caught out years ago listening to the pastor’s daughter singing like an angel in the evening service. One day the surprising human had approached him to invite him to join the service. Spike’s flashed yellow eyes at him hadn’t put the man off. Seemed to take it as a challenge to his faith or something like that. After that, they would chat when meeting. Since Dru and Spike were living in the neighborhood that happened a few times a month at least even after Aretha had moved on and into the big world.

The minister seemed to enjoy having spiritual discussions with the vampire. More than a few of their conversations had spurred a topic of a sermon either there at his home church or when he would guest preach elsewhere. “They do say that no one knows scripture better than the devil,” he’d once quipped.

“Not the devil, but hear he’ll be my landlord in time.” Spike had laughed good-naturedly. “Nope, the scripture’s all courtesy of the CoE and years at university in the Victorian era.”

“Like I said, the devil,” Rev. Franklin had laughed. “Boy, all you need is some good Baptist preachin’ and you’ll be walkin’ up that aisle yourself!”

The minister’s church had been the hub of the civil rights movement in Detroit as well as home of some of the best music to come out of the city even if Miss Aretha never signed with Barry Gordy’s Motown label. 

Buffy was hooked on the Motown sound. Before this time travel ghosty thing, all she really knew about Detroit was lots of empty houses and poverty and Eminem. She’d liked his ‘Slim Shady’ Ep. She knew her mom had mentioned some of the groups that were now more than just names. Really the music everywhere was great.

The soul and R & B coming out of Detroit were brilliant but Buffy also loved all the Flower power and Folky kind of music that seemed everywhere even in the protest marches. People were putting all their feelings into their music, good and bad. It was like everyone was singing out what was on their minds and in their hearts. It wasn’t all love songs or catchy tunes. There were deep subjects filled with hopes, dreams and even fears. Just listening to the music kind of made you feel the mood of the decade.

“Mom is going to be so jealous that I’ve actually heard all her favorites and a lot of them live! I’m really happy Spike loves his music.”

*** 

Delores Gibson sheathed her stake and ducked into the shadows. She hated having to patrol in areas where brothers were lurking. Yeah, vampires were vampires but she’d really rather take out the honky variety. Her Watcher hated when she started talking about Black Power, he despised her large afro too. ‘Stuck up Whitey! Probably figures those Powers screwed up callin’ a sister.’

Tribley, the Watcher in question, had told her that she needed to be more ‘what’d he call it? Oh yeah, circumspect. Looked at me like I wouldn’t understand the word. I’m pullin’ A’s in school no thanks to him and his schedules.’ 

She’d seen her older brother beaten up and jailed in the marches. She’d listened to Dr. King and read pamphlets written by Stokley Carmichael and others who were finished with the whole non-violence approach. There were worse things than demons in her everyday world and she’d looked it in the eye had it spit back at her.

All the violence in her hometown had seemed to attract the fangers. She knew a Santería priestess in the neighborhood who thought they should be trying to get the brothers and sisters who had been turned to form a kind of army, fight the good fight and power to the people. De tried to explain that vampires didn’t give two shits about stuff like that but the old woman was planning some kind of damned ritual that Tribley would want her to break up if he knew about it.

Spike watched the girl. She couldn’t be more than sixteen and her power was real but still raw. She had the makings of a good fighter if she could learn to control the rage that simmered just under the surface. It’d been years since he’d been able to indulge his pursuit of a Slayer. So many died before he could even learn their location.

Made sense one would be there in Motor City. He had noticed lots of demon activity and it figured that the Powers had noticed it too. ‘Silly idea. One girl in the whole bleedin’ world. Where do you send ‘em? What makes one place worth protectin’ and not the rest?” He shrugged. Must be one of those eternal unanswerable questions. He’d run that by Rev. Franklin next time they had a chin wag.

He’d been following the girl and enjoying her more creative ways of putting down his brethern. She had particular skill using whatever tools were at hand. It was always amusing watching her turn fence posts and milk box lids into weapons of war. Spike also chuckled when he realized how well that fro of hers worked to conceal a couple of stakes. She was creative and thought quickly on her feet. 

He hadn’t approached her yet. His pasty white skin marked him as a possible enemy even if the vampire tinglies didn’t go off, such were the times. He really, really, wanted a dance with this one.

Doctor King had been murdered and soon after JFK’s brother Robert as well. There was even more turmoil in the streets and the demons were as active as on a Hellmouth everywhere. The Slayer was a busy girl just trying to keep up. 

Dru had been pestering Spike to make a short trip to Chicago for the upcoming Democratic party’s convention because her pixies were telling her it was going to be a lovely bit of bloodletting. “Just the thing to slip in and enjoy, my Spike.” It had been nearly a year since the bloody riots that had sated Dru’s demon and she was itching for more.

He was half a mind to go along with the idea but he didn’t want to miss his chance to dance with Delores either. Spike laughed as she did an impressive cartwheel that had ended with a double staking of two idiots who hadn’t expected the girl to go for both at once. 

Spike remembered his Chinese Slayer all those years ago. He had learned a bit more respect for them in all the years since. He wouldn’t drink this one down. She was a warrior and deserved death in battle and a quick end when the dance finished. She wasn’t food, she was a fighter.

“White Castle,” De sighed as she counted the change in her pocket. Slaying always made her hungry and antsy in a way she couldn’t pinpoint. “‘Nuff here for a bag of burgers at least.”

Tribley would have a plate ready for her to heat up after patrol but the food was bland and never enough to fill her empty places. Lucky for her the tiny burgers reeking of onions and grease were cheap and tasty.

“We’ve got us a date, princess, just gonna let you grow up a bit first,” Spike promised.

*** 

Dru was watching the tele when he got back in. “lock your doors… dim your lights… and insulate yourself against SHOCK!” Oh yeah, it was Friday and WXYZ always had a decent horror flick on. Tonight was The Invisible Man. It was one of Dru’s old favorites. She loved to mock how he wore wrappings like a mummy to make himself “visible”. “Makes no sense, Spike. ‘E could do ever so many lovely, naughty, wicked, things and no one would see a thing. Don’t know why ‘e decided on only a few murders. Not very ambitious.”

“True poodle, but wouldn’t be much of a story then would it? Just think, him fallin’ for that Flora’s what makes it a tragedy not just a monster film.” He’d seen it a dozen times or more over the decades since it first was in theaters and he and Dru spent hours talking about ways to use the gift of invisibility to advantage for the truly evil.

Buffy shook her head as she remembered a lot of really creative and weird plans they had come up with. Really, Spike had a scary ability to come up with ways around almost anything. ‘ Huh! It seems like he’d come up with ways around that chip in my time.’ 

Buffy began to get the feeling that Spike not killing was more a choice than technology-induced necessity. He could blame the chip and it did keep him from using his fangs but she knew his mind well enough by now to know that if he really wanted them dead that chip would never have stopped him. For that matter, if he was dead set on eating humans he could have found a way to do that too. ‘Yet another thing to puzzle over, just what I needed!’

After the film finished Spike flipped through the four available channels finally landing on a rerun of Star Trek. The episode had already started. It was ‘A Taste of Armageddon’ and Spike settled in to enjoy it again. Xander would have laughed if he knew that Spike could pretty well quote all the lines from all the episodes of the old Sci/Fi series. 

Spike looked down at Dru who had fallen asleep with her head in his lap. He whispered the lines he’d just heard on the screen, words that had touched something in him and made him vaguely uncomfortable yet seemed right at the same time. “We can admit that we're killers, but we're not going to kill today." It had been easier to live that way without his dark, wicked, plum but what would he do without her at his side?

“We’re vampires. Dru’s right,” he sighed. 

Buffy saw it so clearly, saw HIM so clearly. He hungered not for blood and evil but for having a place. He needed to belong and he needed someone to care for. Dru was that for him and that meant being what she demanded. Buffy thought back to all she’d seen of this man both as human and vampire and knew it was just the core of who he was. He would do anything, be anything, to please those he loved. He’d change himself, twist himself into something new if needed.

William had let everyone else label him and he never felt comfortable in his own skin except the areas where he felt secure. His care for his mother and his business acumen were where he hit his stride. The rest was all one effort after another to fit in, to be accepted. Now his areas of security were killing and fighting and he excelled at both. His caring for Dru was just an offshoot of the part of William that had tended to Anne with patience and love. 

All he wanted as a man or vampire was to belong, to love and be loved whatever it took. ‘Maybe if we started including him, started being nicer to him, he’d want to be what we want him to be. Maybe he’d chose to change not just because of the chip.’ Buffy was pretty sure she was on to something important there. Something to remember for later if there was a later that is.

*** 

As Spike played with Dru’s hair and considered her desire to leave Detroit another tableau played out across town. 

Delores met her early end, not in a battle against a vampire or demon but the billy club of a policeman who mistook the girl for a criminal. There was speculation in the squad room about why the girl had two sharp pieces of wood hidden in her hair. “Probably learned to make a shank in juvie,” was the consensus. These ghetto kids start early.”

Tribley didn’t bother to collect the body.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chrysler DeSoto https://youtu.be/_mK48uo3WPc https://www.allpar.com/history/desoto.html 
> 
> The 60s: PBS documentary https://youtu.be/mUc2eLe-ruI and a “Cliff Notes” type look https://youtu.be/lkXFb1sMa38 
> 
> Motown https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Motown 
> 
> 100 greatest Motown hits https://youtu.be/3NYdCSG_6ck and https://youtu.be/hajBdDM2qdg 
> 
> Anti-war playlist https://youtu.be/ntLsElbW9Xo 
> 
> Vietnam war protest songs https://youtu.be/bjSpO2B6G4s 
> 
> Civil rights protest songs https://youtu.be/LJ25-U3jNWM 
> 
> General 60s and 70s protest songs https://youtu.be/gv1KEF8Uw2k 
> 
> And representing the psychedelic 60s https://youtu.be/EUY2kJE0AZE White Rabbit. Jefferson Airplane
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Detroit_Walk_to_Freedom The Walk to Freedom was a mass march during the Civil Rights Movement on June 23, 1963, in Detroit, Michigan. It drew crowds of an estimated 125,000 or more and was known as "the largest civil rights demonstration in the nation's history" up to that date.
> 
> Various ministers and leaders of local and national organizations including the Mayor of Detroit were in attendance and gave speeches. Among them was Martin Luther King Jr. who after the Walk to Freedom March gave an impassioned speech. It was a precursor to his famous "I Have a Dream" speech given weeks later in Washington, D.C. The march itself was, to King and his supporters, partly a practice run of the March on Washington for Jobs and Freedom.
> 
> https://youtu.be/SeUYLAgNVR4 Walk to Freedom march in Detroit
> 
> Civil rights movement overview https://youtu.be/t5EW5e86OBc 
> 
> https://youtu.be/Bug6EyIb_AE women's movement 1960s - 1970s
> 
> https://youtu.be/-wJlao3vJNY 
> 
> And if you want to know about the approved role of women https://youtu.be/o3qPnpwkWe4 
> 
> 1968 https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Miss_America_protest bra-burning
> 
> Draft card burning https://youtu.be/N2d4yyqeheA 
> 
> Political dissent https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Political_dissent 
> 
> In spite of the fact that the nation of the USA was pretty much founded as a form of political dissent and as such protected that right in the Constitution it has not always lived up to that promise https://ncac.org/fepp-articles/fact-sheet-on-political-dissent-and-censorship 
> 
> Interesting article on areas where “free speech” is NOT protected https://people.howstuffworks.com/10-rights-first-amendment-does-not-grant.htm
> 
> Yippies (the political version of hippies) https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Youth_International_Party 
> 
> Police issues with Black population in the 1960s police perspective https://youtu.be/oyGOpcABIes 
> 
> Long hot summer of 1967 and race riots: The summer of 1967 saw five days of riots in Detroit. Forty-three people died, of whom 33 were black and 10 white. There were 467 injured: 182 civilians, 167 Detroit police officers, 83 Detroit firefighters, 17 National Guard troops, 16 State Police officers, and three U.S. Army soldiers. In the riots, 2,509 stores were looted or burned, 388 families were rendered homeless or displaced, and 412 buildings were burned or damaged enough to be demolished. Dollar losses from arson and looting ranged from $40 million to $80 million. That summer there were riots in 159 US cities. 
> 
> https://youtu.be/_hOoW0U6g_E Long hot summer of 1967
> 
> https://theweek.com/captured/712838/long-hot-summer-1967 
> 
> http://www.ushistory.org/us/54g.asp
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1967_Detroit_riot
> 
> https://youtu.be/xH-x7uGSDZM Really good short look here: https://youtu.be/suD6tiyVrLM 
> 
> Black power https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Black_Power 
> 
> https://youtu.be/HvksaM7rRX0 Stokley Carmichael making some good points 
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Decline_of_Detroit 
> 
> https://www.detroitnews.com/media/cinematic/gallery/73181416/metro-detroit-experiences-the-1960s/
> 
> Dr. Franklin’s New Bethel Baptist Church https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/New_Bethel_Baptist_Church_(Detroit,_Michigan) (and a quick look at Aretha in 1987 singing there https://youtu.be/Slwlk8AfwG8 ) 
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Culture_of_Detroit
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Music_of_Detroit
> 
> http://www.soulmusicsanctuary.net/soul-musics-history.htm
> 
> Star Trek episode: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/A_Taste_of_Armageddon And quick clips of the episode:
> 
> https://youtu.be/f_XPgrdX7gk 
> 
> https://youtu.be/Ysk-jF4ptQA 
> 
> https://youtu.be/yKmUd0zHW4w


	39. Chapter 39

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [](https://imgur.com/QtfBTod)  
> 
> 
>  
> 
> Couple of lines of dialogue from Lies My Parents Told Me written by David Fury and Dre Goddard
> 
> NO endorsement or encouragement of drug use intended or implied in the context of this chapter or the story notes at the end. Likewise any illegal substance. This chapter includes a look at Woodstock where such substances were part of the tapestry and it is included for that reason.

Chapter 39

 

“That’s one small step for man… one giant leap for mankind.” Spike smiled widely as he looked from the TV screen that was playing out history right in his own parlor and then towards Dru.

“Who would have believed this back in the day, Sweets? Well Jules Verne and the like, but who else?”

Dru looked thoughtful. “I knew one day. The stars whispered it to me. Daddy beat me for telling! ‘E said ‘e didn’t make me ‘is to spout nonsense and that I should only tell the truth.” The smile faded from her face and Dru looked near to tears. “‘E never knew I always tell the truth. Good girl, I am! ‘E doesn’t always understand when I try to explain though,” she pouted. “Still, the punishment was daddy’s very best. Princess bled for a week.”

Spike grimaced. Even after nearly a century, he’d not developed any love for Angelus’ brand of ‘artistry’. No latent sadistic or masochistic urges had ever developed in him even when he indulged his beloved’s darkest needs.

Spike looked at Dru’s sad countenance and regretted bringing it up. He turned off the TV as Neil Armstrong was planting the U.S. flag staking claim, or at least clamming rights, to the closest thing to the sun that Spike had been able to fully enjoy since his death.

He tackled Dru and began trying to tickle and kiss away her sorrows. She was so torn, his darling! Part of her had been trained to yearn for her daddy and the perverted ‘pleasures’ he made her crave and the other part still the sad, terrified, young girl wanting it all to end.

“What’s say we sign up with NASA? Space is a vacuum but a vamp doesn’t have to breathe. We’d be naturals for space exploration. We can go boldly where no Vamp has gone before. To explore strange new worlds, seek out new life and new civilizations… and eat them,” he twisted the opening lines from Star Trek. Dru giggled in delight.

“Can actually give you the moon and stars, Poodle.”

Spike’s play turned amorous and his tickles morphed into caresses. 

Buffy went to the other room to give them privacy. Sometimes their tenderness hurt her in ways she couldn’t understand. At first, she thought it was because she wished Angel had been as demonstrative and tender a lover as Spike but sincethen she had gotten well past her residual feelings for Angel. She saw him pretty clearly now and recognized that her feelings had nothing to do with him at all. Still, the sight of Spike and Dru burned somewhere in her gut.

Buffy blinked in surprise as her subconscious screamed out a label for her feelings… Buffy was jealous.

*** 

Spike rolled over in the bed. They’d loved their way through the apartment finally winding up in the most traditional place for their last round. Buffy had no idea anyone could be up and ready to go so quickly or often until she had begun her journey with Spike and Dru. She no longer was surprised by it.

Dru looked like a well-fed cat as she raked her sharp nails down Spike’s chest drawing beads of blood that she lapped up lazily.

Spikes fingers tangled in her hair lovingly and he sighed in contentment. He was always proud when his talents and attentions brought Dru bliss without needing to hurt her at the same time. He treasured the moments she permitted him to indulge in HIS secret vice… tenderness.

‘Suppose that IS perverted, for a vamp anyway,’ he mused.

“Heard about some outdoor music festival in the boonies of New York. Thought we’d go give it a look-see. No decent punk bands but there’ll be Hendrix and Joplin, Santana, and lots of other brilliant bands over a few days. Lots of flower children just beggin’ to be picked… what do you say, Pidge? Feel like gettin’ groovy?” Spike raised a brow and waited for Dru’s response.

He’d discovered punk rock at a club back in Detroit and fallen into mad love. Never before had his two favorite interests combined so perfectly! Anarchy and music! It was tailor-made for a vamp of discriminating tastes. Shame those bands were still marginalized and largely unknown outside of a cult-like following. He would have loved to see the Stooges or Metros take the stage. Blow the rest out of the water. ‘Bet the peace and love hippies would even get into a bit of rough and tumble.’

Still, all the promised bands and solo acts were worth hearing. He’s loved Graham Nash back when he was playing with the Hollies and mixing it up with Crosby and Stills was brilliant. Adding Neil Young was inspired. ‘Like a smorgasbord of ear yummies for a fella who could appreciate any GOOD music from Brahms to bloody Baez and everything in between.’ He was just that fellow. 

*** 

Buffy hadn’t seen Spike’s hair this long since China. The style was pretty hot. She wasn’t sure about the whole East Indian styled paisley shirt and love beads but he made a convincing hippy. Dru and her floaty dresses and vacant eyes fit right in as well. 

The music was amazing! It was a feast for the ears and Buffy happily chowed down every morsel. She was really, really, glad that she couldn’t smell anything though because, for all the peace and love vibe, hippies were kinda pigs. Maybe it was because most of them were too stoned to notice the reek but the vampires noticed plenty for all three of them. ‘Gives a new meaning to the phrase unwashed masses,’ Buffy quipped as she watched a tangled foursome literally wallowing in the mud in the field. ‘Next time Giles or mom says something about my generation I’ll have some choice words to toss back.’

Spike followed his third target stealthily. No one was being killed… there were too many available blood donors to need to drink more than a bit from several. Most were really into it too, practically offering. This girl was seriously whacked on something. She was talking to stars just like Dru only she wasn’t insane as far as Buffy could tell. ‘Probably some of that LDS stuff,’ she decided.

Spike finished his meal and soon began to wander about sporting a lopsided, slightly goofy smile. “He’s hugging people!” Buffy started to laugh until she hurt as she watched him dance and laugh with the other high people. At one point he got seriously involved in a drum circle with some would-be Native-American cos-players ending the performance by kissing all of them farewell, the guys and girls. They were all weepy at the thought of parting forever. “GOD I wish I had a camera! This is blackmail gold,” Buffy decided.

Spike sat watching his hand dance to the music on the stage. “Bloke could get used to this. Seriously far-out.” The grin grew and his hands began taking on the look of a talented hula dancer. 

“Spike?” Dru looked at her lover in puzzlement. “Are you talking to my Pixies?”

Spike gazed at Dru, who was a lovely shade of purple… or maybe she only looked that way because Jimmy Hendrix was singing about some purple haze. “You’re a lovely shy violet. Come let me pluck and sniff you.”

Dru danced away slightly. “No sniffing mummy when any flower will do you! You’re in the garden where all the blooms look lovely. Only mummy should look lovely to her boy.”

Spike reached out for her and fell to the side only to become enraptured by the sweet clover under his face forgetting all about flowers even his violet. 

“Man is he out of it!” Buffy shook her head. “Wonder how long drugs stay in a vamp?”

Turned out it was several hours. 

It also turned out to be only the first embrace of hallucinogenics of many over the long three days and nights. Luckily Dru managed to pull him into shelter during the sunny part of the day. It was nice that most of the crowd were more than welcoming to strangers wanting to crash in their vans. 

“Maybe Dru handles it better because she’s used to functioning while loopy. Kind of nice to see her taking care of him for a change.”

*** 

Buffy quirked a brow as she watched Spike select his dinner. ‘William is still working on his issues.’ From the time they had arrived in Boston he’d targeted the modern-day versions of the “frilly-cuffed elite” he’d railed against back in his human days, the ones who had tormented him literally to death. With both Harvard and MIT in the area, the pickings were abundant.

He especially liked to do his shopping at Frat parties and meetings of ‘secret societies’ favored by the elite of the elite. He wasn’t killing them, that would be stupid, draw too much attention. Spike hadn’t lived this long and not learned that. Killing or draining all your meals only led to a quick end. Not all vampires were that smart and that was likely why not that many lived to a great age. The young idiots were put down fairly quickly either by a savvy human or other demons who knew them to be a danger to all the rest.

Buffy thought back to when Spike had returned to Sunnydale and running into him at the Frat party when he and Harmony were working on a bit of carry-out. She shook her head and thought it was about time he deal with his issues at long last and let it go. He wasn’t the butt of jokes any longer in need of avenging his sense of honor. 

That made her think of all the jokes she and the Scoobies had lobbed at him since the chip and cringed at the realization that she had been every bit as bad as those who had bullied young William. ‘I’m better than that!’. Well, she thought the was. Maybe she let herself become a bully because she had convinced herself that Spike wasn’t real, had no feelings to be hurt. She knew that was a crock of crapola now, should have known it before. She vowed to do better once her regular life resumed. “God I hope it will eventually anyway. … Good guys, or those of us who like to think we are, shouldn’t pick on others who can’t really fight back or who are already down.”

You couldn’t swing a cat without hitting a college or university in or near Boston! Plenty of places to grab a meal and fade away unnoticed. 

Then there were the fellow music lovers at the different bars and concerts that added a bit of spice too.

It was during one of those feeding forays that Spike deepened his love for Punk Rock. He appreciated the local groups like Ground Zero having seen their gig at Bunratty’s. Buns was always a great place to hunt and enjoy some music at the same time.

Like most university towns in this turbulent era, there were plenty of anti-war and civil-rights protests with crowds big enough to cull without drawing notice. In short, Boston was close to perfect for them.

They had set up a cozy home in the old Hotel Vendome. The large, old, gorgeous building was under new ownership and being renovated. That gave plenty of choices for the pair of them to take advantage of the size of the place and still remain unseen. Just a bit of vigilance and warning devices and they were gold.

One lazy Saturday Spike was listening to a Red Sox game and waiting for sundown while Dru was quietly doing God knows what in the adjoining room. The next thing he knew smoke was wafting into his room and Spike rushed to get the two of them to safety. 

Dru never did confess to just how she managed to start the fire much less why. She’d wandered into an area that gave access to an enclosed space between the third and fourth floors and managed to start a blaze. No one except a handful of renovation workers were in the building but it rapidly turned into a major blaze and loss of comfy digs. Nine firefighters died fighting the blaze as they saved the building, it was the worst firefighting disaster in Boston history when it came to loss of life.

Their new quarters were less spacious but workable. They had to commute further to get to their preferred hunting ground too. But as 1973 left the scene and 1974 came into being it brought with it further reasons for civil disobedience, violence, protests and the resulting easy hunting that went with that territory. The courts had finally decided in the case of Morgan vs. Hennigan and bussing to desegregate the schools had begun. To say parents weren’t happy would be an understatement.

Buffy found herself more disturbed watching frothing white adult protestors throwing rocks at school buses filled with frightened children than watching her vampires hunt. 

*** 

“Heard there’s a new Slayer making all kinds of waves down in the Big Apple. Feel like a move?”

Spike was excited. This girl had been called in 1970 and was still alive! Considering she was black in an era that made her a target for all sorts of human mayhem let alone dealing with being the One Chosen to fight the things that go bump in the night it intrigued him that she still was going strong. She had to be either the luckiest Slayer ever or finally a warrior worthy of a fight.

Dru perked up. “Can we go to Studio 54?” As much as Spike had been drawn to the rough-edged raw power of Punk music, Dru had been attracted to all things Disco. The mirrored balls fascinated her she could stare at one for hours, as did all the glitz and glamour of the crowds attracted to the venues catering to the craze. 

Truthfully Spike could enjoy the funkier beat of some of it. Good dancing music. He was far less drawn to the fans. Lots of preening peacocks in his estimation. Still, he could tolerate it enough to please his Turtledove. “So long as I get my time at CB’s,” he agreed. CBGBs was the mecca for Punk bands and fans and Spike couldn’t wait to dive right in… literally. Crowd surfing sounded like a perfect way to get a good brawl going!

Spike cut and bleached his hair using gel to turn his curls into something more resembling his name. Jeans, leather, torn tee-shirts and lots of safety pins and chains soon had him looking more like he belonged on the stage than in the audience. 

By the time 1975 was drawing to a close they were regulars. Dru was the darling of the ‘beautiful people’ of 54, posing for Andy Warhol for a series of his portraits and joining his regular table with such luminaries as Liza Minelli and Bianca Jagger. Cocaine was as available as cocktails and excess was the rule of the day. Even Dru’s antics couldn’t always compete with the humans in her circle. Bianca Jagger’s ride on a white horse while being led by a naked man had made Dru determined to find a way to steal back the title of most unique. Somehow she never was able to top the day-to-day behavior of those around her!

She never hunted among the party-goers, she enjoyed them far too much. She was sorely tempted by one rude, annoying man who fancied himself God’s gift to women and seemed to believe no meant yes. He didn’t drink or dance but never missed a chance to corner a pretty young girl. “Not even a celebrity, just wants to think ‘e’s important. ‘Is daddy gave ‘im lots of money but ‘e’s not really anything more than a rich landlord. Always tellin’ tall-tales and too much in love with ‘imself to ever make a good match. My pixies tell me ‘e’s going to be really lucky though. Even when ‘is money is all gone, someone will always ‘elp ‘im out. Going to be powerful and never seem to get in trouble no matter what ‘e does.”

Spike had met the arrogant bloke and decided if he did hunt among this herd this one would be on the ‘okay to kill cause he’d be doing the world a favor’ list. “Yeah, still he has all the press followin’ him around so best let him live,” he shrugged. “Nothn’ but a loser of a con-man anyway. Not worthy of my darlin’ makin’ a meal of him.”

Spike’s crowd wasn’t the rich and famous but they were raw and real and he loved the whole scene. He’d been working on learning the guitar for quite a few years and, frankly with Punk bands, minimal talent was sufficient. He’d begun playing with a few of the regular bands when they needed some extra chords or a backing vocal.

When not brawling or dancing at CBGBs or other Punk hangouts he was playing the pretty with Dru and her set on the other end of town. It was one big party.

Spike also had his contacts in the demon community keeping tabs on the true shining star, the Slayer who finally showed ability and promise enough to pit his skills against in a true battle. Everything he learned about this Nikki thrilled and intrigued him.

The girl had moves! She was smart and gorgeous. She could street-brawl with the best of them but also knew her weapons. She was fearless but also knew to temper it with caution. There was a maturity about her that bespoke of duty beyond just being Chosen by the Powers. She looked tired quite often and Spike didn’t want to start their dance when she wasn’t in top form. It would be a waste! He wanted this dance to go on and on before the final number.

So he watched.

He watched as the powerhouse kicked major demon ass relentlessly. He watched as she joined in the search for the serial killer calling himself Son of Sam who was terrorizing the public and causing all the girls to change their hair color to try to stay off his victim preference radar. Even when it was obvious that demons had nothing to do with the murder spree the girl still kept her eyes and ears open. ‘Really cares about all those humans out there,’ Spike nodded approvingly.

During the great blackout she’d helped the police try to keep some kind of order. She was a true believer in all things good. ‘Savin’ the world for puppies and kiddies and whatall.’

One evening he spotted her in Central Park and for once she didn’t look totally exhausted. Seemed a good time to get acquainted, begin the dance. The rain set the mood perfectly. 

Spike didn’t see who she was talking to when her reaction to his approach was to sternly order someone to, “get small and stay still.” Oh well, a witness to the first dance was fine with him. He had no plans to make this a one-off. This one deserved a long courtship.

The fight was a blaze of glory! The girl had it all and he could have danced with her forever. She was a bit off her game though and Spike managed to get her in a choke-hold. Drag a fang over her throat, remind the girl what was at stake, nothing truly serious yet. There was a crash as a trashcan was knocked over, just enough of a distraction to take Spike’s mind off the game and the Slayer to fling him onto the pavement.

Spike managed to spring up, laughing in delight. The girl threw her deadly piece of wood with precision and only Spikes fast reflexes kept him from being so much ash for the rain to wash away. He grinned as he clasped the stake, just inches from his heart, his hands almost holding it prayerfully. “Well, all right. Got the moves, don't you? I'm gonna ride you hard before I put you away, luv.” 

Spike grinned, clearly excited and delighted in equal parts. “I spent a long time trying to track you down. Don't want the dance to end so soon, do you, Nikki? The music's just starting, isn't it?” Oh yeah, he had lots of plans for this one. He was going to take his time and enjoy every step. Spike tossed the stake back at her, not as a weapon but a challenge. It landed on the pavement at her feet. He swung up onto the short wall using the lamp post to make a flashy show of his exit and before dropping to the pathway below the footbridge and gave her a nod and parting words. “By the way… love the coat,” and dropped down and away before the Slayer even picked up the returned stake at her feet.

Spike made a leap and gave a cheer as he raced back to Dru. The best dance of his life had just started and he couldn’t wait for the band to strike up the next tune.

[](https://imgur.com/8Tt28Xh)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sad and little known end of Neil Armstrong (Apollo 11) https://www.space.com/neil-armstrong-wrongful-death-settlement.html APOLLO 11 LANDING https://youtu.be/k_OD2V6fMLQ 
> 
> https://longreads.com/2018/11/19/an-oral-history-of-detroit-punk-rock/
> 
> In 1969 a magazine based in and around Detroit known as CREEM: "America's Only Rock 'n' Roll Magazine," was started by Barry Kramer and founding editor Tony Reay. CREEM is known as the first publication to coin the words "punk rock" and "heavy metal". (Source https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Music_of_Detroit )
> 
> Detroit punk The Stooges from 69 https://youtu.be/3gsWt7ey6bo   
> The Metros - "Lay It On Me" - Detroit Punk https://youtu.be/zr_J7o6PcUk   
> Crosby, Stills, Nash and Young in 1969 https://youtu.be/ciIdRSAHLOg   
> Santana at Woodstock https://youtu.be/FvlU3019oeo   
> Jimmy Hendrix in 1969 (Vevo has taken down most Woodstock film of many artists performances) https://youtu.be/PbwUH_eJ2fk   
> Janis Joplin at Woodstock (not full performance) https://youtu.be/Lz7x5pMdN0c   
> Joan Baez doing We Shall Overcome at Woodstock https://youtu.be/pj_9KshfQuw   
> Woodstock https://youtu.be/7EWehhSB0s4 
> 
> List of performers at Woodstock https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_performances_and_events_at_Woodstock_Festival  
> Woodstock live album part 1 https://youtu.be/96MH5oDkq0A (click on the publisher sidekicknick for the other recordings from the album... vinyl so pops and clicks.)
> 
> LSD (which was legal in the USA until the governors of Nevada and California both signed bills into law on May 30, 1966, to control LSD, making them the first two states to outlaw the manufacture, sale, and possession of the drug. The law went into effect immediately in Nevada, and on October 6, 1966, in California. Other U.S. states and the rest of the world followed with the ban soon after. LSD was already popular in the flower-power and rock-and-roll world. It was also spoken of positively by such unexpected fans as Cary Grant who was using it under the control of his psychiatrist and swore by the results. https://www.esquire.com/lifestyle/health/a55611/cary-grant-took-acid/  
>  https://youtu.be/wG5JyorwYPo   
> “Taking Woodstock” LSD Scene https://youtu.be/fQeeXVngdmA 
> 
> https://www.history.com/topics/crime/history-of-lsd   
> https://digboston.com/dirty-old-boston-the-rise-and-rage-of-boston-punk-in-the-70s-on-film/   
> Boston early 70s https://youtu.be/1uOxBXwBjZ0   
> https://www.raveuprecords.com/rur/ground-zero   
> http://www.bahistory.org/RockHistory.html  
> https://vanyaland.com/2018/08/30/boston-gone-the-sites-of-rock-clubs-and-music-venues-no-longer-with-us/
> 
> Boston punk rock group Ground Zero https://youtu.be/r5vUUsmXTq0   
> Hotel Vendome fire. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hotel_Vendome_fire https://youtu.be/W7Xu1Cc_uOo and through the years before and after fire https://youtu.be/wktqORd8tCc 
> 
> Boston bussing protests https://youtu.be/3qlylxu7wvc   
> http://openvault.wgbh.org/exhibits/boston_civil_rights/article Lead up including the 60s  
> https://www.schusterinstituteinvestigations.org/southies-lost-generation another perspective
> 
> Photo slide show NYC (circa 1975) https://youtu.be/2gz9fc_x2dA 
> 
> The seventies. Disco Dru Studio 54 https://www.billboard.com/photos/8214722/studio-54-pictures
> 
> Studio 54 https://youtu.be/Qgob2BUPgUw long documentary or shorter https://youtu.be/CQ6zuv_CEMs 
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Andy_Warhol 
> 
> https://www.rollingstone.com/music/music-news/studio-54-10-wild-stories-from-clubs-debauched-heyday-198626/
> 
> https://mixmag.net/read/23-photos-summing-up-the-glorious-madness-of-new-york-club-studio-54-news
> 
> Disco https://youtu.be/N9xDAk1W248 
> 
> Poor Disco was so disrespected https://youtu.be/I1CP1751wJA 
> 
> Punk https://youtu.be/xq4TFC9ELFo 
> 
> Ramones at Cbgbs https://youtu.be/0PRl4niBZc8 
> 
> https://youtu.be/8u0G2SyCJkw Velvet Underground, The N Y Dolls, CBGBs & The NY Punk Revolution; Part 1 of 5
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/David_Berkowitz 
> 
> https://youtu.be/oHDWOcF8hZ4 
> 
> Trailer for the film Summer of Sam by Spike Lee https://youtu.be/0a-E4Q9CHSk 
> 
> 1977 blackout https://youtu.be/pyPjGwGg4-s


	40. Chapter 40

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [](https://imgur.com/XZaTaeX)
> 
> Nikki’s death is listed as July 13, 1977, on Buffyverse wiki but the actual date wasn’t in the script or on-screen. I’m not sure where they sourced that date, likely from the novel Blackout. While a fine novel, it is not hard canon so I am keeping it in 1977 (that IS canon) but not holding it to the July date.
> 
> I’m out of my comfort zone with all the fight scenes. Hope I do them justice enough for what’s needed.

Chapter 40

 

Spike slid behind a pillar out of sight of the hot Slayer. The D train was due in the station and he considered changing his hunting plans rather than start his second dance in such a crowded location. A subway platform during busy hours hardly left room for the kind of moves he wanted to indulge in, moves the girl had shown she could match.

 

“Yeah, I know Bernie but I’ve promised Robin all summer and he gets little enough of my time already.”

 

‘Interesting. Chit’s goin’ on a date and takin’ her bloody Watcher?’

 

“Nikki. I’m not asking you to be a negligent parent but surely a trip to an amusement park should wait until you track down one of the more notorious vampires to have challenged you since you were called. William the Bloody is dangerous! He’s part of the Whirlwind and cannot be allowed to run tame in our city!”

 

“And just when did you see me havin’ this vacation time?”

 

‘Oh. Not a boyfriend. Slayer has a kid. What the hell kind of Watcher lets his girl get up the spout on his watch? How’s the girl supposed to be all Chosen and righteous and change nappies at the same time?’ Spike was intrigued. ‘Maybe the old codger’s the pop.’

 

“Mommy, can I ride the Cyclone this time?”

 

“No, you’re still not tall enough. They won’t let you on till you’re this high,” Nikki held her hand out showing he had a couple of feet yet before he’d be allowed on the old wooden coaster. “No ride on the Spook-a-Rama either, it gives you nightmares!”

 

“I’m a big kid now,” the child insisted. “I won’t get scared of no fake zombies.”

 

“World’s scary enough without that. Plenty of other rides and stuff without messin’ with your head that way. Tell him Bernie.”

 

“Yes, well…”

 

Spike looked at the young boy and the pasty Watcher. ‘Nope. Kid’s not half tweed. Looks like his Slayer liked to play and Watcher turned a blind eye, at least once. Well if she’s takin’ the kiddie to Brooklyn, looks like I’m takin’ the D all the way to Coney Island too. Likely to find someplace to get in a dance.’

 

There was nothing like a sweltering NY summer day to make folks throng to the beaches looking for a bit of relief. Coney Island was packed with moms and dads trying to keep track of little kiddies while getting a bit of a break from the hot city with its baking concrete.

 

Spike knew well how to bide his time. While the Slayer and her kid rode all the safe rides and the Watcher… watched… he nipped under the boardwalk where so many young lovers groped their way to third base. Left a few light-headed, but ultimately okay, as he wiped the blood from his lips. “Topped off proper, ready to dance.”

 

“Uncle Bernie, bet you can’t win one of those,” the kid pointed to a stuffie of a snake. “Mom can but bet you can’t.”

 

The older man looked affronted, “Young man, just who do you think taught your mother to use a weapon?”

 

It was clear from the child’s face that he had manipulated the adult into joining in the activities quite masterfully. ‘Probably has the old goat wrapped around his finger,’ Spike grinned.

 

“I’ll go get us some Nathans while Uncle Bernie tries to remember the big black dot in the center is the target,” Nikki teased the Watcher.

 

Spike followed as the Slayer headed to the hot dog stand. Along the way, she noted a group of vamps busily cornering a cowering teenaged couple behind the arcade. ‘Great, can’t even get a few hours of playtime,’ she rolled her eyes then quickly dusted the one holding the boy. “Run home puppies,” she ordered the kids. “Think you cheap-ass Dracula’s got lost from the spook house.” She grabbed the nearest vamp and twisted his head until, with a loud crack, his neck snapped and he dusted. “That’s two for the hot mama, none for the dead squad.” She used some of her more creative moves on the rest before finally staking the other idiots. 

 

Spike was enthralled. The girl not only had the moves but she had a quick wit and fun banter. She was a treasure. 

 

Spike applauded and stepped from the shadows. “Oh, yeah. That’s the stuff. Sweet brown sugar with a touch of spice. Gonna call you Foxy.”

 

“I’m gonna call you dust,” she glared and lunged.

 

The dance began.

 

Buffy remembered her first encounter with Spike behind the Bronze. “What the hell? That was how he greeted me or close to it. I thought I was special!” She was strangely miffed to know that this method of engagement was similar to theirs. “Suddenly I don’t feel so bad for roughing you up a bit. You weren’t supposed to use some formula lines on me as if I’m just some Slayer!”

 

The fight kept to the dark passage behind the noisy arcade drawing no notice from the crowds of people in the area. Nikki’s moves were straight out of a kung-fu movie and Spike matched each with ease. It really did look like a dance. “Keep your damned movie quotes to yourself punk-boy. I’m not some blacksploitation mamma you can play with.”

 

“Quotes fit, pet. You are a whole lot of woman. Gonna sign all your dance cards,” Spike wasn’t even winded but he was laughing in glee with each blow. She landed a solid kick to his midsection knocking him into a dumpster disturbing a small pack of feral cats.

 

“Damn,” he hissed as one laid his arm open with its claws. “Bet you’ve got claws too, kitten,” he licked at the cuts. Spike sprung up and grabbed her arm pulling it behind her and putting enough pressure on it to make her drop the stake. “Not fast enough though. Need a bit of practice. Decent dance partner.

 

Nikki felt him up against her back but refused to tremble. If this fool was going to end her at least Robin wouldn’t have to see it in front of his own eyes. 

 

Spike flung her away from him, spinning her so that she could see his grinning face. He bit his bottom lip and wiggled his eyebrows. He hadn’t even slipped into his demon guise. “Not bad.” He had the balls to wink at her. “Catch you on the rebound, Foxy,” he promised and melted into the shadows as if he’d never been there.

 

Nikki gathered her wits then straightened her jacket and continued on to Nathans. “Crazy ass vampire! Couldda had me. He tryin’ to yank my chain? Dude needs to get real.” Still, she had to admit her blood was running hot. He’d been good. Too good. There was a part of her that looked forward to running into him again. Somehow she knew she would. 

 

*** 

"The nasty woman deserves fangs and a slow death. She’s all lollipops and kisses until the poppets are alone with ‘er then she’s like the wicked step-mum.”

 

“She is indeed,” Spike agreed.

 

“‘Urts the little ones what’s already ‘urting.” Dru’s eyes filled with tears. “Let’s wait by the back door and show ‘er what terror feels like!”

 

“Dru, it’s a play. Mrs. Hannigan is a fictional character. All those little kiddies are goin’ to their real mums and dads to be tucked up safe as houses tonight.”

 

“But Spike, she’s just awful!”

 

“Yeah, she’s a right brilliant actress. Most think she’ll win a Tony.” He chuckled and smoothed Dru’s hair from where she’d clutched it in her upset tirade. “Poodle, you LIKE Dorothy Loudan. Remember how funny she was on the Gary Moore Show when she replaced Carol Burnett? She’s just playin’ at bein’ nasty. Not like us, pet, not true wicked.”

 

Buffy was always amazed and saddened to see glimpses of this part of Dru. It was so clear that deep within her madness had been someone quite loving. A person meant to be a real mummy. Because of the twisted mind and the demon inside that she couldn’t or wouldn’t control it became perverted sooner or later. Maybe she wanted to put them out of their misery or perhaps it was that in drinking them down she was taking them inside herself… who knew? Likely not even Dru.

 

The attraction to kids and enjoyment of them turned her into a child murderess. The Council books were full of stories about Drusilla the Mad and her preferred targets for slaughter but Buffy saw it now as more of a tragedy than wickedness; confused impulses instead of true evil intent.

 

Dru was a real dilemma, one that Buffy was glad she didn’t need to worry about. As long as the vampiress stayed off of Buffy’s turf she wouldn’t have to make any hard calls.

 

She didn’t see any way to ‘fix’ Dru either. If she got Willow to give her a soul it would only make it worse. The guilt would be unbearable and Dru did NOT deserve that kind of suffering. She already had enough moments when Miss Edith condemned her actions.

 

The madness wasn’t really curable either. Buffy didn’t think she deserved an eternity in a mental hospital either.

 

Still, Dru was a highly efficient and deadly predator who chose the most innocent of all as her victims when given her choice. Buffy couldn’t let that continue if it was happening in her territory.

 

Buffy had seen that with the right influence Sam and Spike could be dealt with in ways that didn’t require staking. Not so with Dru. It was a full-time job for Spike to keep her in as much check as he did. ‘He really loved her! I mean really, really committed and forgiving and self-sacrificing love too.’

 

Buffy thought about how Angel with his soul had behaved where his tortured child was concerned. ‘He just walked away like he did with me. When the choices get hard, he walks.’ He should have killed Dru mercifully at some point in the century after he got the soul. Maybe he couldn’t bring himself to kill her, but he also never did anything to take care of her, to control her. ‘She might have even obeyed him better than Spike. Angel might have been able to insist she bag it. She’d never do that for Spike, but for her ‘daddy’ she might.’

 

Dru was continuing to press her case about killing the lovely actress they had just watched at the Alvin theater. ‘Annie’ was one of the most popular Broadway musicals of the day. Dru had been avid to see it ever since she read the reviews and the story of it being about orphans during the Great Depression. Spike had relieved both his hunger and the need for impossible to get tickets in one action. The seats had been excellent as had been the taste of terror from the former seat-holders. That had not been catch and release. Buffy hoped the couple hadn’t left many behind to grieve their passing.

 

“Come on precious. Let’s go clubbing. Find some annoying old Biddy for you to eat. Someone who might be like a real-life Mrs. Hannigan, what do you say?” He cuddled her close to his side. “Shouldn’t be too hard to find a hard-hearted, drunken, bitch or two.”

 

Dru was pacified.

 

*** 

 

Spike chided himself for the whimsy, or maybe it had been nostalgia, that had led him to Queens and Flushing Meadows Park for his hunt. It was profoundly silly really. Not that many potential meals, just ghosts of crowds past.

 

He wished they’d been there in 64 or 65 for the World’s Fair. Would have been great hunting grounds then. Now there were just some locals and the odd tourist checking out the repurposed buildings from that past event. The Unisphere and fountains that once proudly welcomed a world’s selection of people and goodies on display still drew the eye.

 

He’d heard it had been a great fair… one of the best. Walt Disney had contributed several exhibits and technology that were now at his theme parks. Spike was sure Dru would love ‘It’s a Small World’ with all the singing and dancing dollies. He was fascinated with the idea of Mr. Lincoln with a robot President of all things! Maybe he and Dru would make it all the way out to California one day and take them in even if they missed their debut here during the fair. Probably great for hunting there too.

 

It was always better to have a large selection. Didn’t have to drain them then, no leaving a trail of corpses to tip off the normals.

 

He’d finally settled on a couple of obvious tourists taking pictures of the large globe sculpture. He’d decided they’d do nicely to take the edge off his hunger. Now he just needed to get them somewhere that wouldn’t attract notice.

 

“Well, if it ain’t the pale and pasty pain in my ass.”

 

Spike turned quickly enough to dodge a well-executed kick that would have made his kidneys scream if it had connected.

 

His face looked positively gleeful as he recognized his Slayer. “Well, well… let you out of the city again then Foxy?”

 

“I’m everywhere but mostly on your trail.”

 

“I’m flattered. Must be my sinister attraction and charm.”

 

“Dream on jive-ass blood-sucker,” she rolled her eyes and poised her stake in preparation for their next dance. “Sorry… dead and dusty’s not my thang but maybe you’ll get lucky in hell.”

 

She lunged in using fists instead of pointy wood going for the pain, not the kill. Spike figured she liked their game as much as he did because she wasn’t doing anything to try to make quick work of him. 

 

She lashed out with an impressive upper-cut that slammed into his jaw making him see all the stars that Dru had yet to name.

 

“Nice one pet.” He crouched low and swept his leg out tripping Nikki nearly bringing her to her knees. “Not good enough, of course, but nice. That Watcher teach you more than how to use weapons or does it come natural like?”

 

Nikki didn’t let on how unnerved she was with the vampire mentioning Crowley’s comment to Robin at the arcade the last time they met. This vamp must have been stalking her back at Coney Island instead of it being a chance encounter. “You keep your cold, dead, hands away from my kid!” Her punches became wild as her fear made her lose her poise.

 

“Not lookin’ to harm the Short Stack,” he shrugged. “No fun in that. Now his hot mamma… hell yeah.”

 

“Not what the Watchers Diaries say. You got quite a rep for tearin’ into plenty of babies.”

 

“Don’t believe everything you read, Pet. Wrong family member there. I prefer someone gets my blood hot and baby you’ve got me at a boil,” he curled his tongue behind his teeth and leered at her.

 

The blows and kicks were flying as the fight claimed more and more ground.

 

“Gonna turn off your burner for good you Sid Vicious wanna-be.”

 

“More like Johnny Rotten, Foxy.”

 

“Whatever,” she threw her weight behind a roundhouse kick but Spike slid easily to the side. “Just a poser no matter what punk creep you play at.”

 

“That right? Spike laughed. “Gotta do better than this to take me out so who’s the poser?”

 

This time Nikki was the one to pin Spike. Her stake was primed and set to plunge when one of the tourists he’d planned to have for lunch let out a scream giving Spike the chance to duck under Nikki’s arm and slip away.

 

“This round was almost yours Foxy. Gettin’ better.” He sounded almost proud of her!

 

*** 

Spike and Dru lived in the East Village and as had always been their habit they kept their hunting to places away from their home. Dru didn’t care to go further afield than the Lower East Side with the occasional visit to Little Italy or Chinatown. Mainly she stayed in Manhattan proper. 

 

Spike preferred to ride the subway and troll Brooklyn or Queens. There were always the subway tunnels themselves to hunt in if necessary. Many a homeless person or addict had camped out in the vast underground. Bodies could go unnoticed for months if they drained one of those unfortunates to the point of death. The crime rate was pretty high and most of those deaths were chalked up to infighting for territory. ‘Amazin’ how humans ignore exsanguination from wounds on the neck and try to tell themselves it was a knife fight gone wrong!’

 

There were also events that provided happy hunting. Right now the boys of summer were drawing huge crowds at Yankee stadium. They had a real shot at the pennant and a slot in the Worlds Series thanks to a great line up that included a powerful player named Reggie Jackson. Spike had even attended a couple of night games just to watch the play.

 

There were the theaters, live and film, and endless music and art venues. Spike put his foot down on all of those. “Those are the places I like to go just to enjoy. Not gonna start dinin’ on people there, Pet. Plenty of other places to grab a meal. There are literally millions of people livin’ on this island and if we get tired of them there’s always Jersey just across the river.”

 

“Think I’m gonna take in another night game at the stadium. Thin the herd of fans, support the ole’ home team and whatall.”

 

Dru smiled indulgently. She knew he was enjoying the excitement running through the crowds. Made him feel human. For some reason, her Knight seemed to like that. 

 

I’d rather go see a film but go on without me, Spike. I’ll prob’ly just get a bite then stay in. The last film we saw still ‘as Miss Edith upset! She was quite put out with that silly man playing in ‘is food like that. ‘e should not have supper for the next two days as punishment for building that mountain from ‘is taters that way.”

 

“Miss Edith’s not wrong. Wasteful to turn dinner into a toy. Tried tellin’ our elders that all the time,” Spike muttered.

 

“I don’t know why those aliens would want someone with no manners like that!”

 

Buffy giggled. Dru had been ranting about that scene in ‘Close Encounters of the Third Kind’ for weeks since they had seen the film. The two of them had developed a love for the Sci/Fi genre and had both loved Star Wars earlier in the year. The latest film had been less fun and adventure and more cerebral and Spike had loved it. Dru, however, couldn’t get past the mashed potato scene.

 

Spike drew her into his arms and snuggled her, whispering in her ear, “I don’t have to go. It’s only a stupid American version of Cricket after all. The game’s not as long either,” he snickered. “We can slip out and grab a meal, drop by Club 82 and catch a drag show? I heard Blondie is gonna play there, you like Debbie Harry. We’ll make a date out of it, eh?”

 

The following night Spike went with Dru to her haunts and put on a happy face. Getting a look at Bianca Jagger on horseback in the club was worth the irritation of the more cloying members of Dru’s entourage.

 

*** 

Spike grabbed his guitar case and headed for the door. Dru was having one of her tea parties for her dollies and in no mood to join him at CBGBs. She wasn’t too interested in the punk scene anyway. Spike thought the frenzy merely confused her demon unlike her favorite disco venues where the crazy was a bit more contained.

 

“Got a call from Rev. He and Vega got a new tune needs a guitar even though that pisses ‘em off. Asked me to sit in. Suicide can pack ‘em in at CB’s. Sure you don’t want to come?”

 

“We are having ‘igh tea, Spike. It would be rude to leave the girls ‘ere to go to that club.”

 

Spike suspected Dru was a bit jealous that he had a set of friends that didn’t include her. She made a point of bringing up all the ‘beautiful people’ she partied with at her favorite clubs when Spike begged off. “Grandmummy and daddy would not approve of the low clubs you frequent, Spike. At least my club ‘as glamor and proper people.”

 

“Bunch of pretentious cats gettin’ their boogie on. I can get down with that sometimes,” he shrugged. “Not as much fun as a good dance and bash at CB though.”

 

The crowd was large. Spike was enjoying having to duck beer bottles as he played with the group stopping long enough to throw them back. It was a good night and it might wind up leading to a lovely drunken brawl outside if he was really lucky. He’d pissed off more than one club-goer with his rude comments and gestures even without the flying glass.

 

Spike played with several groups from time to time when an extra guitar was needed, sometimes when it wasn’t. He’d an open invitation with Richard Hell and the Voidoids and Patti Smith among other regulars. Suicide usually were minimalist with just the two of them but tonight they had a piece they wanted to experiment with and they’d called Spike in desperation. Rev was a dab hand at electronic instruments like the synthesizer and the like but an old school guitar was not his thing.

 

The other groups just welcomed Spike jamming with them because he was a cool dude who always had the skinny on what’s happening, or so they said. Spike always had great stories they only half believed.

 

It was turning into just the kind of night that Spike loved the most. The music had been narly, the crowd tuned in and turned on and there was violence in the air. Spike slipped out the back and slammed one of his hecklers against the brick hoping that the orange-haired punk’s wanker buddies would jump in and make it worth his trouble. 

 

“This party open or does a sister have to pay cover?”

 

And it just got better. “Foxy! What’re you doin’ down here? Don’t seem like your kind of gig.”

 

“It’s not. Someone did me a solid and told me you’d be lurkin’ around here.” She turned a fierce gaze on the punks Spike had planned to go a round or two with. “You need to bug out before the man gets here,” she threatened. 

 

“Can’t arrest me!” Orange hair insisted. “I’m legal.”

 

“You’re gonna be a statistic if you don’t get your white ass out of here, can you dig it?”

 

“Listen to the lady. She’s a hair puller. Could lose your mohawk.”

 

The kid paled and patted his hair before backing out of the alley. “Hey, you and your chick want a bit of privacy, I’m cool with that.”

 

Spike looked at Nikki and began to rock on the balls of his feet. “Well, this night just got better. Come to find me, did you?”

 

“Not too hard. You’re predictable.”

 

“Now I’m insulted. Like to think I’m cuttin’ edge, man of many interests and all.”

 

“You’re not a man.”

 

“Baby I could prove you wrong if you want that kind of dance,” he taunted and ran his hands down his vest covered chest to his crotch to run over the sizable bulge there.

 

Nikki shuddered. “Don’t think so.”

 

“Well,” Spike actually sounded disappointed which surprised Buffy. “Let’s get our groove on then.”

 

All the years of Buffy watching him she rarely saw him seriously seek out someone other than Dru for sex. ‘Guess all that rock-n-roll and the idea of fighting really does make him horny.’

 

This fight was brutal. Less play and a lot more intent. It was clear that Nikki was done with Spike’s games. She had hunted him down and was giving it her all to make this the last time she had to fight this particular vamp. 

 

It was taking all of Spike’s concentration to keep ahead of her. All those things he loved best about her style were in use. Nikki was as good as Bruce Lee when it came to using whatever was around to help her fight. Luckily for Spike so was he.

 

Spike grabbed her arm and swung her into a dumpster but before he could gloat she’d ripped the loose lid off and flung it at him causing him to lose his footing for a moment. He rocked back up immediately saving himself from the stake she’d produced from somewhere.

 

He kicked Nikki in the back and pushed her into that same dumpster hard enough to dent it. She was dazed but not down and came back in a flurry of punches and jabs. 

 

“Now that’s gonna bruise,” Spike grinned as she landed a combination punch to his left eye. “So’s this,” he promised as he swung a powerful blow to her right side doubling her over momentarily. 

 

Spike stopped playing and followed it up with kicks and blows hard and fast enough to send the Slayer to the ground.

 

“You are going down, sucker. I’ve got the 411 on you now, only a matter of time,” Nikki vowed from her position on the alley pavement.

 

“I’ll be ready. Meanwhile… got places to be.” Spike spun with a flourish and left her there.

 

Spike didn’t want to admit it but he was a bit unnerved that the Slayer had changed the rules on him. She was stalking him now, picking the time and place for their dances. The girl knew too much for his comfort.

 

*** 

 

“So I thought we’d try Max’s tonight. You’ll like it. Got all the spit and vinegar I love but the digs on Park Avenue in Gramercy Park’ll give you new places to hunt first. Sound good, Poodle?”

 

“Will you be playing?”

 

“Nah. Dictators are playin’, got plenty of guitar players without the likes of me.”

 

Spike and Dru were doing a bit of actual shopping in Macy’s. They were making plans for a night out together and as a bribe Spike had picked up the tab for a slinky dress that had spoken to Dru. For once it was on the rack and not on another woman.

 

Heading down the wood-floored escalator they were too caught up in conversation to notice who was on the packed up escalator until Spike heard the snarled, “Spike!”

 

It was the Slayer. The last thing Spike wanted was a matchup with Dru present. Too difficult to concentrate on his moves while protecting his love at the same time!

 

Nikki began shoving through the crowds on the escalator trying to get to the lower level before the vampire arrived there and she lost track of him.

 

Spike leaned down and urgently whispered to Dru, “Meet me at home, Ducks… got a bit of a situation here,” then launched himself over the side to the floor below with catlike grace. He had to lead the Slayer away from Dru before she snapped to the fact that the woman he’d been chatting up was also a vampire and one that mattered to him a great deal.

 

He made a circuitous path back to their flat trying to throw off the Slayer. She had clearly figured out his favorite clubs and even managed to run into him in the bleedin’ store! “City of 7 million and she manages to just casually run into me… not bloody likely.”

 

He made a stop at the home of the one demon in the whole of Manhattan with a finger in every pie… possibly in a literal sense. “So seems to me the chit’s got to be more than just the luckiest Slayer around. What do you know Basso?”

 

The demon blinked his middle eye nervously. Spike didn’t take bad news well according to his reputation. “Slayer has contacts. Seems she got all kinds of info on you and your lady. Really committed to ending both of you.”

 

“That how she found me outside CB's?”

 

Basso laughed, “Well, that could have just been her using her brain. I mean you’re a walking advertisement for the whole punk scene. Only so many places likely to find you on any given night. Doesn’t need a spy network to figure that one out.”

 

Spike raised an eyebrow and shot him a gimlet eye.

 

“So what DOES she know… and more important what demons signed their death warrant by talkin'?”

 

Basso ran a finger around his collar. “Only one for certain I know is the Ano-Movic bartender at Tier 3 named Gary. He let her know about you playing gigs with different bands. Think he also said something about your lady not liking the scene but being more of a disco queen.”

 

Spike slammed Basso against the wall. “You tell Gary… No, wait… you say nothin’ to Gary. He’s a dead demon, I’d stay clear. What else does the Slayer know?”

 

“Nothing! She got nothing out of me or my crew. Know better than to turn on one of our own.”

 

“Keep that in mind. Any danger to Dru’ll lead to a quick death, spread the word.”

 

“Sure, sure.” Basso nodded so emphatically his neck flaps jiggled.

 

Spike got back to the flat and found Dru pacing about nervously. She must have realized there was trouble or maybe one of her pixies had clued her in. She rushed to greet Spike as he closed the door behind him.

 

“That girl, the one who knew you...she’s one of those nasty Slayers.”

 

“Yeah. She’s the one I’ve been enjoyin’ lately. Lots of good moves. Stupid bint’s decided to play for keeps though. Knows too much about our lifestyle too. Thinkin’ we’ll change plans for tonight. Head over to your watering hole instead. You can wear the new togs. I’ll meet up with you later.”

 

Dru brightened. Liza Minelli was going to be in town and she was always good for a laugh.

 

Spike called a cab and escorted Dru to the front of the line where all the regulars gained admittance. The bouncer was used to seeing the punk-garbed escort of the popular girl who always hung with the A list. ‘He’s not staying tonight. At least he knows the dress code when he does.’

 

Spike spotted Nikki in the crowds outside Studio54. Clearly, Gary had spilled more than just his habits to the Slayer. “Last number coming up,” he sounded a bit dejected.

 

“What’s that?” Dru hadn’t been paying attention.

 

“Got a bit of an errand, Poodle. You go on in and play with the other puppies and I’ll see you at home later.” He kissed her and slipped into the shadows behind the Slayer who had not spotted him at that point.

 

Buffy had watched Spike play with this Slayer all summer long. In a way, it reminded her of their own encounters. It was funny how obvious it was that Spike hadn’t killed the girl because he had chosen not to… not yet. He had been having fun.

 

“I think he was having fun with me too. So many times that first year he could have killed me with no problem. He was a much better fighter than I was back then. He must have just enjoyed the fight.” She bit her lip. “Not fun now though. He’s scared. He’s afraid Dru’s in danger just like when he stopped the attack on all those kids when we were locked in. He would have killed me that time if I’d actually staked her.”

 

She remembered all their encounters before the truce and saw the pattern. Spike really was dancing with her just like he had been with this one. 

 

*** 

“Damned slippery fanger,” Nikki groused. She’d watched the stream of glitterary go into the club she had been told drew her vampire nemesis and his paramour, Elvira, Mistress of the Dark. She’s been a bit creeped out by the female when she’d seen her at Macy’s. She’d thought Dru was a potential victim at first but it clicked with one look into the dark, evil, eyes that the female was as undead as her boyfriend. 

 

She’d wasted valuable patrolling time checking out the patrons of Studio 54 hoping to spot one or both of them. “Bernie’s gonna be PO’d that I haven’t nailed them yet. I promised it would be copacetic soon but the snarky pest just keeps easin’ on down the road.”

 

‘Right here, darlin’,’ Spike thought as he followed the muttering Slayer. ‘Had a right good time with you, gonna hate to end it. Can’t risk Dru though. You had to go all pro-active on me.’

 

Nikki sighed wearily. “Gonna have to punch some info from that demon, find their nest and get ‘em while they’re chill.”

 

She pivoted to the entry to the subway and tromped down the stairs. Enough upscale people in this part of the city using above-ground transportation to get to their preferred places to party so the platform was almost empty at this hour. So was the train when it came in and the doors slid open. Nikki opted for a car that had no other passengers. Last thing she wanted was having to fend off some human up to mischief trying to rob her or worse. 

 

Her eyes shot up as another passenger slipped in just as the doors closed. It was Spike. She groaned. ‘Looks like the sucker found me.’

 

“Hear you’ve been lookin’ for me, Foxy. I’m right flattered but can’t give my girl a reason to get all green-eyed.”

 

“If you mean Morticia, doubt she’s worried. You demons haven’t got any morals anyway.”

 

Spike growled. “You know nothing about what demons have and haven’t got, how we love.”

 

Spike threw the first punch, right into her face knocking her back. He wasn’t pulling his punches this time. This was a dance to the death… no more playtime.

 

Nikki grabbed Spike and spun him against the side of the train ramming his head through the glass as the world whipped by. He let out a primal scream that perfectly fit his appearance. He was a punk, he was wild and untamed and he was invincible and there was no way he was going to lose this fight.

 

He kicked back hitting Nikki in the groin and propelling her into one of the poles that lined the middle of the car loosening it.

 

Nikki bounced back with a vengeance raining blows on the smirking punk. “Made a big mistake, vamp. It’s gonna be goodnight John-boy.”

 

“Don’t think so missy. More like the Powers gonna be choosin’ up someone new before sunrise. We’re done playing.”

 

Spike pulled the loosened pole and began to twirl it like a baton. “No damned quarter this time.” He used the bar like a weapon extending his reach.

 

Nikki scrambled backward but leaned back sweeping her leg out to trip the vampire who merely leaped over her leg as if jumping a rope. His eyes were deadly, his gaze intent.

 

Nikki launched herself at him leveling kicks and blows non-stop. She managed to pummel him back to where he tripped over debris and landed on his back Nikki riding him down and pinning him. She had him now, just needed her stake. 

 

She fumbled for the place where her trusty weapon should have been and realized it must have dropped in the battle. The lights flickered as she frantically searched the area around her with her eyes while sitting on Spike to hold him down for the kill.

 

Spike took the opening and reversed their positions smoothly. His hands wrapped around her neck as he looked into her terrified eyes. “Sorry, ducks. Woulda’ loved a longer dance but you had to change the music,” and he snapped her neck. 

 

He moved off her body, breathing hard. “Damn! Gonna miss this one. Took me over 70 years to find the likes of her.” He sat on the filthy subway floor and looked at the girl who had given him his best competition yet. “You were one fine Slayer, pet. Hope those Powers of yours give you a right proper welcome. If you hadn’t come at Dru we coulda’ kept this up a nice long time.”

 

He wiped some blood from his forehead touching the scar that his first Slayer had given him and narrowed his eyes. “Need something to always remember you, Pet. Give a bit of tribute to the best Slayer I’ve met yet, yeah?” He stripped the coat from Nikki’s body, shook it out and put it on. “Thanks, luv. You won’t be forgotten.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Blaxploitation on the 70s bunch of films that were targeted to a black audience one of which was Foxy Brown, the one Spike chose for his nicknames and come-on’s to Nikki
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Foxy_Brown_(film) 
> 
> https://youtu.be/YHziuA9bM7k 
> 
> Annie premiered in April 1977 on broadway at the Alvin Theatre (now the Neil Simon theater) https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Annie_(musical) . 
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Neil_Simon_Theatre https://youtu.be/SgpkIQHo-Is 
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dorothy_Loudon She replaced Carol Burnett on https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Garry_Moore_Show in the early 1960s https://youtu.be/-arPXjmNaWo 
> 
> 1977 Tony awards performance original cast Annie https://youtu.be/ZDSXlNAyPvE 
> 
> https://youtu.be/XoQomf9FBxc Full play summer 2010, The Huntington Beach Playhouse 
> 
> https://youtu.be/DhVpWYrBLRI reggie jackson playing for the NY Yankees 1977 world series champions
> 
> Close Encounters of the Third Kind mashed potatos scene https://youtu.be/cdkS0TgEG30 
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1964_New_York_World's_Fair then https://youtu.be/LdWnrjCcDWI and now https://youtu.be/En_3qZbY4QI (nothing for the 1970’s but you get the idea) Queens New York City was left with a much-improved Flushing Meadows Park following the fair, taking possession of the park from the Fair Corporation in June 1967. The Unisphere stands at the center of the park as a symbol of "Man's Achievements on a Shrinking Globe in an Expanding Universe".
> 
> https://allthatsinteresting.com/new-york-punk-scene-photographs 
> 
> Max’s Kansas City Photos https://www.dazeddigital.com/photography/article/35764/1/max-s-kansas-city-new-york-1970s-anton-perich
> 
> NY subway 1977 https://youtu.be/C05zfQKwYY0 https://www.thevintagenews.com/2018/07/11/nyc-subway-1970s/ https://www.esquire.com/lifestyle/g25239325/new-york-city-subway-1970s/ 
> 
> Coney Island 1977 in photos http://www.brianrose.com/blog/2017/08/new-yorkconey-island-1977-2/ 
> 
> https://youtu.be/fe0hJysN5xQ Coney Island 1976
> 
> More current coney island https://youtu.be/iEYrma_D7kM 
> 
> Live webcam Coney island now https://balticlivecam.com/cameras/united-states/new-york/brighton-beach/ 
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coney_Island 
> 
> https://youtu.be/wHCok5Y3GFs Spook-a-Rama, Coney Island
> 
> Cyclone, Coney Island https://youtu.be/o2-RXqU4Lg8 
> 
> Unisphere Flushing Meadows Park https://youtu.be/n9henaLAzdY 
> 
> Disneyland Goes to the World’s Fair 1964 https://youtu.be/HzClhcK97OY 
> 
> Classic funk https://youtu.be/5OQl4WTkWTc https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Funk and the Godfather of soul himself, James Brown (instrumental funk to feed your soul) https://youtu.be/Y2D7qUD9wnQ 
> 
> 1977 in New York City https://youtu.be/KFgyezfS6ik https://youtu.be/pyKkS_v1-1I https://youtu.be/HFZwX05UzG8 
> 
> NYC 1977 in photos https://allthatsinteresting.com/new-york-summer-1977-photos 
> 
> https://youtu.be/9qypAcyFXcQ lest it gets lost in the clutter LOL vid of NYC 1977
> 
> Richard Hell/Dead Boys/Ramones : CBGBs 1977 https://youtu.be/5mc4DFT1bwA 
> 
> The Dictators (full concert in SF, CA July 1977) https://youtu.be/d7VHeazTn_A 
> 
> Patti Smith doing Horses https://youtu.be/oNMnWTNCFSU 
> 
> Blondie at CBGBs 1977 https://youtu.be/nKLehWEZIwE 
> 
> Suicide Ghost Rider (1977) https://youtu.be/Dn7SBQ6X5HU 
> 
> Talking Heads Psycho Killer (1977) https://youtu.be/BlWZFxCQ0uk 
> 
> https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/rmjwvq/highlighting-the-iconic-new-york-music-venues-of-the-70s


	41. Chapter 41

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [](https://imgur.com/GDEh6WD)  
> 
> 
>  
> 
> Yes, I have “cast” John Cleese in the role of Bernard Crowley in this chapter’s illustration.  
> Small bit of dialogue from Fool For Love by Doug Petrie

Chapter 41 

 

Buffy watched Spike strut proudly wearing the coat that had belonged to her sister Slayer. She felt so torn. ‘Nikki and I were a lot alike. She could have been me!’ 

 

Still as Buffy watched Spike it occurred to her that the pride she saw Spike display was pride in having bested a worthy warrior not the kind of bravado of a serial killer or the like. He didn’t preen and brag over his other kills even if they had been dangerous crowds or demons. It wasn’t the killing he was proud of, it was winning against the odds. “I think the idiot is something of an adrenaline junkie,” she realized.”Do vampires even have adrenaline?” Sometimes she was still amazed at how little she’d been taught about the very beings she was designed to hunt and kill.

 

The only times she’d seen him celebrate kills were when the outcome had been in question. He’d kill for Dru and it was methodical and quick. He sometimes killed out of boredom or because his opponent didn’t give him another option and he did it with no remorse in those cases. He drained a victim or two if he disliked the person especially or if he was nearly starving. Normal feeding was largely catch and release when he had the choice. It wasn’t because of some moral issue, Buffy realized, but practicality. Death was something to be taken seriously to him it seemed. Something to court and defeat. 

 

He’d enjoyed the fight with Nikki more than the kill. He would have stretched it out for a long time if the choice had been his. It was necessity that caused it to end when and how it did. Buffy wondered if he might have simply walked away in the end and not killed her at all as a kind of reward for all the fun? “He’s complicated. It’s possible. He could have killed me a gazillion times early on. Even the fight when he had the Gem had been one that should have led to a quick death for me. I was off my game big time. He kept saying terrible things to get me to fight back, fight better. It was the fight he wanted.”

 

Spike was sitting in one of his favorite neighborhood watering holes and had enough Jack in him to loosen his tongue a bit. The Fraklor demon buying his drinks was wanting a blow-by-blow of how the last Slayer had met her end. Spike hadn’t wanted to talk about it when sober, likely out of respect for the girl Buffy supposed.

 

“But she could have killed you!” the demon gasped. Any demon or vampire with a brain usually fled from the Slayer. Not this vampire though. He’d killed two and they weren’t newly called either. All the demons in New York had seen how the last Slayer fought and stayed off her radar as much as possible.

 

Spike slammed back his latest shot and tilted his head. “And part of me wants it. Not only to stop the fear and uncertainty but ‘cause I’m just a little bit in love with it.” He stared into nothing. “That final gasp and look of peace they get at the end. Wonder what it’s like? Where does it lead you? Told a vamp is set for hell but don’t know any came back to prove that one way or another. Raised in CoE, big on grace and forgiveness and all that rot so... who knows?”

 

“Thought all you vamps were big on ruling in hell and that stuff?”

 

Spike shrugged. “Not keen on torture. Don’t care much for the company of demons,” he grinned at his companion, “present company excluded o’ course. Usually a borin’ lot. Got some faces I’d like to see again.” He grabbed the bottle and poured another shot as he thought of the long-dead family he’d missed forever.

 

“So you’re gonna… what? Get religion? Redeem yourself?”

 

Spike giggled, “Not bloody likely! Wasn’t a choirboy even when I was a choirboy. ‘Sides, the whole Order of Aurelius pretty much is a religion for most of the riff-raff belongin’. Worship the old-ones. Not for me with all that chantin’ and bowin’ to a bunch of dead demons.” Spike drank the shot. “Naw… likely it’ll be hell in good time, but a fella has to wonder. There’s mercy out there. I’ve seen it.”

 

Buffy blinked, “Damn! He has a death wish! Why haven’t I noticed that before?” She thought back and some things made more sense in that light. His taunting of Angelus especially. The many drunken brawls with burley longshoremen and the like. His seeking out Slayers. “Still, when it comes down to it he fights to live.” She shook her head and felt herself get choked up. “Likely having to take care of Dru kept him fighting until he got his feet under him early on or he’d have just dusted early.”

 

“Yeah, bummer with the no-soul too. Would make redemption kinda not possible.”

 

“Don’t know. I mean what the hell is a soul anyway? You got one?”

 

The Fraklor looked confused. “Um… I don’t know.”

 

“‘Xactly. Show me one or prove what they do,” Spike slurred his words slightly. “Make a big deal about somethin’ they know nothin’ ‘bout.” He thought of his grandsire and shuddered. “Seems the only thing it can do is make you run out on your family.”

 

“Huh?”

 

“Never mind. Point is lots of demons and humans claimin’ to have ‘em still plenty evil, cruel and uncarin’. Not sure there is such a thing.”

 

“So you’re the same as you were before you were turned?”

 

“Bits of me, yeah. Biggest difference is I got free of worryin’ ‘bout what everybody else might think ‘bout me, what I do and say. Don’t lose sleep over anything I find I have to do either.” Spike thought a bit about the blood on his hands. “You do what you have to do and survive. Don’t know what might be the judgment for that. Doubt the Almighty Whatever’s gonna send the sorry sods over there eatin’ burgers to hell on account of the cows what died,” he nodded towards a table full of diners.

 

Buffy thought about Spike in her time, chipped and at the mercy of people who hated him and taunted him. “He must really want it to end now that he can’t even fight! I’ll have to find a way to give him a reason when … if… I get back. He did it for Sam. It’s the least I can do for him. Maybe we can find a way that he can get some of his purpose back so he doesn’t decide to court a dusting. Damn! No wonder he’s always yanking my chain, and Giles too. He wants out but wants it from someone worthy to do it!”

 

Buffy found that thought disturbing. “Not on my watch buster. Might not work to get that chip out right away, not until we have a treaty or something but not gonna let you wallow yourself into a ticket to that great whatever.”

 

*** 

 

“Bloody damned aliens,” Spike slammed his fists on the unit punching through the screen and causing sparks to fly and the arcade attendants to cower. This would be the third video arcade he’d find himself banned from at this rate. “Space fucking Invaders can keep the bloody planet far as I’m concerned.”

 

Buffy knew it wasn’t being beaten by a video game that was pissing Spike off. It was the too short dance that had left him both furious and sad. “70 soddin’ years and didn’t get more than a few go-rounds. Not fair.” He touched the collar of his new coat with near reverence. “Not gonna see her like in a lifetime I reckon.”

 

He slammed the apartment door and stomped into the living room where Dru was happily combing Miss Edith’s hair and watching “The Love Boat”.

 

“Spike, shall we go on one of these ships next time? They look quite lovely and I fancy that sweet Gopher person.”

 

Spike blinked in confusion. He was still miles deep in his own memories and desires. “Wha’sat Pet? Wanna go off somewhere other than the Big Apple? Though you had scads of friends here.”

 

“Oh, I do indeed, but most of them travel too so it needn’t be a forever goodbye.” Dru turned and gave him her full attention. “That’s what’s plaguing my Dark Prince. You ‘ate forever goodbyes. The little Slayer left too soon.”

 

Dru fixed her gaze directly on Buffy. “One day You’ll meet ‘er like again. Even better.” She frowned. “Next one’ll take your fangs, she will. No ‘ope for you then. But not ‘er time yet. My wicked boy is still mine for now.”

 

Spike frowned and tried to follow her line of thought. It was lucid enough and he recognized it as most likely a vision. “Seein’ another Chosen One then? I know when one snuffs it a new one’s called but they either aren’t worth a go or somethin’ else gets ‘em first.”

 

“Can’t you feel ‘er any more, my Spike?”

 

“Feel who, Poodle.”

 

“The Sunshine.”

 

“Haven’t felt sunshine in a century, Luv.”

 

“She’s all around you. You’re covered in ‘er. Makes you taste like ashes.” Dru looked at him with her head tilted in a very Spike-like way. “You used to know.”

 

Spike had a feeling Dru was talking about the presence that had always been there since he crawled from his grave. The invisible companion who was always just out of range of his senses. He’d initially thought it was an angry angel sent in judgment of his newly embraced evil. Then he thought it was the Slayer spirit as he began his quest to become a legend by killing Slayers. Over the last few decades, it had just been white noise so accustomed to the feeling he had become. 

 

In the beginning, he’d felt the ire and judgment, but as decade followed decade the feeling had become more like a silent and invisible companion… always there. Since WWII it had become almost friendly in the feeling he sensed.

 

‘Maybe it’s my own demon. Been there all along. Get on like Samwise and Frodo now, don't really notice.’

 

“Yeah, still feel it when I focus but maybe yours talks back, Pet.”

 

“I don’t ‘ave a ghosty. No Christmas Future for Dru. Only my Spike. Wasn’t there when mummy went on travels.”

 

“Well makes me special then, I guess,” Spike shrugged it off.

 

“Your bleedin’,” Dru noted his dripping fists.

 

“Had another dust-up with the cheatin’ arcade. Set to rob you blind, or would if I actually paid. Can’t beat the bugger yet but did figure out how to get the game started without feedin’ in the quarters.”

 

“Did you destroy this one too?”

 

Spike looked a bit sheepish. “Yeah, not gonna be allowed in Fletcher’s place now either. Runnin’ out of playground in our own neighborhood at this rate.”

 

Dru shrugged, “Well it is a big city.”

 

***

 

Basso was lurking near Max’s searching the sea of mohawks and eyeliner for Spike.

 

“Hey,” he tugged on the vampire’s sleeve. “Thought you ought to know that former Watcher’s got it in for you. Turned into a zealot after you offed his girl. Quit the Council, raisin’ her kid…” Basso shook his head. “Imagine, a Slayer with a kid!... Anyway says he’s makin’ it his life’s work to hunt you down and get payback. Regular Crusader. Got a true convert with the kid too even though the little guy should be interested in doin’ battle with toy soldiers instead of huntin’ vamps! He’s payin’ anyone who can lead him to you and your missus.”

 

The demon had his hand out as if expecting payment only to be met with a raised eyebrow and dirty look from Spike. The growl that followed caused him to put the hand down, wiping the sweaty palm on his trousers.

 

“We’ve been sending him on a wild goose chase but it’s only a matter of time till he finds someone you’ve pissed off enough to get greedy. Gary had family for one thing.”

 

“Can take care of myself but thanks for the heads up.”

 

Spike affected unconcern but inside the idea of the former Watcher with a personal vendetta worried him. New York had a large population but if Nikki had shared her intel on his habits and that of Dru it wouldn’t take too long to be found. He would have to either be glued to Dru’s side or discover a magical way to be two places at one time if he wanted to ensure both of their survival. The best plan was strategic retreat and hope that cooler heads would prevail in time. Surely the grudge would be surpassed by the day-to-day raising of the Slayer’s kid! Life did go on.

 

*** 

“Thinkin’ ‘bout us movin’ along for a bit, Poodle.”

 

“Off to take that Love Boat cruise? The man who sings that song said they’re expecting us.” 

 

Spike stared at Dru. He really had thought she was doing pretty well but what crap was this?

 

“No, my Dove… you DO know that the song isn’t being sung just to you, it’s a theme song for the television show… right?

 

Dru doubled over in laughter at his expression. “Silly boy! I made you think such nonsense! I’m not THAT daft.” She watched the relief wash over him as he realized she was having him on. “Only pixies and the stars sing just for me!”

 

Buffy smiled. She had learned to appreciate Dru’s wit over the years. Spike had been right when he said she could be quite playful.

 

“Right.” Spike shook like a dog ridding itself of water. “And no to the cruise too. Thinkin’ maybe a trip up north to Canada. Haven’t been there yet.”

 

“What’s up there? Ice and those large deer with wide antlers like Bullwinkle in the cartoon.” Her voice dropped to a conspiratorial whisper, “I don’t think they are best friends with squirrels though, even the clever ones.” her mouth formed a perfect moue of distaste. She really disliked being cold even if they were room temperature by nature.

 

“Lots more in Canada than just that, sweets. Let's go explore,” he cajoled and leaned in for a nuzzle.

 

“Why not Puerto Rico? Ate a lovely girl last week from there and it made me yearn to see the rainforest and beaches.”

 

“Could work,” Spike nodded. “Not likely to look for a pair of vamps in the sunny Carribean, not right away at least.

 

The telephone rang interrupting the travel plans and Spike picked it up in irritation. Likely one of Dru’s disco buddies wanting to dance the night away or somesuch.

 

“Steve? How they hangin'? Hear you got signed finally.” Spike grinned as one of his punk buddies clued him in on their success. 

 

“Not sure we can come to London just now… no, not tied down here. … Look I’ll run it past Dru and get back with you.” He hung up and bit his bottom lip. Hiding in plain sight had worked back in the 60s, it might again if they played it smart.

 

“Dru,” he motioned towards the telephone with his head. “That was Severin, you remember him?”

 

“Isn’t ‘e the one what plays guitar with that Susie girl you like so much?”

 

“It’s Siouxsie and the Banshees and yes that’s him and yes I like their music.” Spike grinned. 

“They’re tearing it up in London. Got a record label and lots of gigs booked. Only problem is they lost Pete Fenton, not that he was a real loss… couldn’t play proper down and dirty… bit too traditional for a punk band. They’re recruiting a new guitarist, need one right quick too for the gigs they have comin’ up. Since we were just decidin’ where to decamp for a while… how do you feel about London?”

 

“Does my dark Knight want to be a rock star?”

 

Spike laughed heartily, wiping tears from his cheeks. “No, Pet. That’s what makes me perfect. Got no interest in a permanent job of any kind much less one so public. Just lend a hand for a bit till they get someone that’s a good fit. Steve knows I’m more a pick-up guitarist and don’t want the life, ‘s why he thought of me. ‘Sides, I know their playlist. Said they got an offer from Smith from The Cure but he’d be another Fenton in the end, turned him down. Now they’re auditionin’ but need someone to hit the stage in the meantime.”

 

“I suppose it would be fine but promise we can go somewhere sunny and fun later?”

 

“Dru sunny isn’t really much of an option but we’ll do the best we can, yeah?” Spike snapped his fingers. “We can do a side trip to Liverpool and put the fear of William the Bloody in old Algernon’s sprogs. Can’t believe the soddin’ poof actually reproduced! Who’d marry Algernon Pratt anyway?” He shook his head in puzzlement.

 

“He’s leavin’ the business to his kiddies and I’ve got some ideas for modernizin’ again. The import/export end of the firm’s still producin’ but the shipbuildin’ laggin’ Figure they should get into tankers. That’s the future. Figure a week or so scarin’ ‘em straight’ll put ‘em on the right course. Worked on their Da.”

 

“Might I stay in London while you go north? You’ll be all about business anyway.”

 

“Depends, Ducks. You going to be a good girl? Don’t want the Council of Wankers to get wind we’re in town and don’t want to chase all over Europe after you if some scaley demon leads you astray.”

 

Dru looked somber. “Not going anywhere, Spike. I’ll behave too. Besides my pixies just said grandmummy will be in London and we can catch up a bit.”

 

Spike rolled his eyes. “Yeah, that’ll be grand. She’ll be right pleased seein’ me.”

 

Dru smiled. “She does like you Spike, she doesn’t want to but she does.”

 

Spike kissed Dru and bounded to the door. “Well… off to figure out a flight that’ll keep us nice and undusty. Maybe that Concorde jet, make the trip in no time at all. Pack what you’ll need and we can store the rest. We’ll be back once we had some adventures over the pond, yeah?”

 

*** 

“I do ‘ate that I’m going to miss the Woman’s Equality Day March next August. Me mum would ‘ave loved ‘ow much different things are now from ‘er time.”

 

“Well, Poodle, things usually progress a bit even if there are bumps along the road and a detour or two.”

 

“But that Bella Abzug is going to be the Grand Marshall and I do love ‘er and ‘er hats.”

 

“We’ll see bits on the telly, love. You couldn’t go to the parade anyway cause of Mr. Sunshine and all.”

 

“Could find a nice shady spot to watch. You never let the sun stop you from your pleasures.”

 

“True. Still, Dru I made a commitment to play with the band till they get someone up to speed and you know I always keep my word.”

 

“Right ‘onorable you are,” Dru kissed him on the forehead. “Still I would ‘ave loved to see ‘er lead the parade. She might get that Shirley Chisholm to march too. Both of them strong women, just like me mum.”

 

Spike smiled fondly. “That they are. Your mum would say you’re a strong woman too, Poodle. Took everything fate and your daddy threw at you and didn’t lose all of yourself. Still a force of nature.”

 

“I am, aren’t I,” Dru stood tall and proud.

 

“Poor Dru, her pride is just that she survived at all,” Buffy thought sympathetically.

 

***

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Love Boat opening theme https://youtu.be/m_wFEB4Oxlo
> 
> https://youtu.be/olECgzzyUEU Princess cruises back in the day (12:07 for the Island Princess segment)
> 
> A taste of Rocky and Bullwinkle https://youtu.be/hTzuO24i-YA 
> 
> London punks https://youtu.be/IABnsIDer-0 
> 
> https://youtu.be/P-SmOU5cSDg 
> 
> https://youtu.be/WgaVKfgCC3c 
> 
> Other musicians take on punk https://youtu.be/0GKiMvnpqW4 (Bowie, McCartney etc)
> 
> Uk punk scene https://www.udiscovermusic.com/stories/top-10-legendary-uk-punk-gigs/ 
> 
> Siouxsie and the Banshees 1979 https://youtu.be/89qasuFgUGs 
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Siouxsie_and_the_Banshees 
> 
> What William likely grew up believing (Anglican/ Church of England) on grace and salvation: http://thehackneyhub.blogspot.com/2014/06/the-doctrines-of-grace-and-anglican.html 
> 
> https://youtu.be/QNuUneiUvsQ https://youtu.be/HFsa2Ku1E_I Women’s Equality Day and march
> 
> Bella Abzug https://youtu.be/HFZwX05UzG8
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bella_Abzug 
> 
> Shirley Chisholm https://youtu.be/M8uv-uV3XwY 
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shirley_Chisholm 
> 
> https://youtu.be/CSzeGTZmRQQ on both of them
> 
> The Concorde https://youtu.be/a_wuykzfFzE 
> 
> Flight NY to London (From 2003) https://youtu.be/YeEB2Lxbfa4


	42. Chapter 42

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [](https://imgur.com/Ep162rU)

Chapter 42

 

“Got a lovely letter from Bianca,” Dru said. She was giving Spike a shoulder massage. His were often tight after playing gigs and brawling with the fans after a show… sometimes during, for that matter.

 

“That’s nice pet,” he purred. “Misses you no doubt.”

 

“She’s turned all serious since she and Mick broke up, poor dear. ‘Ates what’s ‘appening in ‘er old country. Becomin’ a regular do-gooder lookin’ for donations from all ‘er old crowd what ‘as cash. Can we send ‘er some for the little one's Spike?”

 

Spike shrugged. Money meant nothing to him really. He could nick whatever they needed. Still, he had plenty from his portion of the family business and always would. It was largely untouched, he only paid attention to it to make certain he had a say-so in how the firm was run. And that was a matter of pride, honor, and responsibility and not about the money either. His father had built the company from nothing and the least Henry’s William could do was see it well-tended. 

 

“Reckon we can spare a bit. Now that Algernon’s sprogs are up to snuff the profits’ll double at the very least. Helped the bright one negotiate a deal with the Grand Poobah or Sultan or whatever he calls himself in Iraq for a couple of tankers. How much you wanna send?”

 

Dru shrugged. “Don’t know. Lot’s of kiddies in Nicaragua but it is a tiny country, isn’t it?”

 

Spike pulled her head down and kissed her soundly. “We’ll ask about, yeah? Send her a right lovely bank draft, make you the star of your group. They’ll throw you a party fit for the Princess you are when we get back to the city.”

 

“She’s got more than parties on ‘er mind now.” Dru smiled sadly. “The Pixies say that soon she’ll be all over the world like a wee worker bee. No more tea and cakes or pony rides for ‘er.”

 

“That’s the trouble with a conscience, Plum. Quick way to end the party. Glad we don’t have that problem.”

 

*** 

“Sid’s dead,” Spike slammed a fist through the flat’s wall. “21 damned years old; was naught but a baby.” Spike looked genuinely sad. “That’ll be the end of the Sex Pistols for sure. Bloke meant it when he said he’d rather be with his Nancy. Another fool for love in the end, always gets you dead. Don’t think he did mean to kill the bird. Bleedin’ tragic mess of a human. Killed his lady then rode his favorite horse straight to hell.”

 

“I often kill those I love,” Dru pouted. “Don’t always mean to.”

 

“I know, Pet.”

 

“Grandmummy wants to see you,” Dru hinted.

 

“Was never her fair-haired boy, Poodle, find it hard to think it’d matter ‘less she wants somethin’ from me.” Spike shuddered at the thought of what that might be.

 

“Gets lonely, she does. Misses ‘er family like I do.”

 

Spike laughed. He doubted that. Darla was an odd one. She had hardened her heart years before she was ever turned. He’d seen a few chinks from time to time but rarely did it lead to any heart-to-hearts.

 

Spike went ahead with his plans for the evening in spite of Dru’s pleas that he meet with Darla. After all, if that poser Broad was going around sporting Spike’s trademark look he wasn’t going to be thought of as copying the poofter! If the wanna-be punk rocker wanted to spike up his white hair and copy Spike’s clothing, well, then it was well past time for a change.

 

Maybe not a bad time to look a bit different anyway since the Council was still looking for him after that last Slayer kill. Time for a bit of deep brown, he decided. Let the curls have full rein too. Look like a regular new-wave pretty-boy. ‘Least Dru fancies the look. Not so bad, do like that Adam Ant bloke so not like she’s wantin’ me to start lookin’ like one of the brothers Gibb.”

 

Buffy thought the look was pretty hot with the curls falling into his eyes giving him a bad-boy rocker look. ‘Yeah, he could work on a poster. Could replace the Backstreet Boys on the west wall.’

 

*** 

 

Darla looked deep in thought. After putting it off for a couple of days while Dru went deeper into the pouts Spike gave in and agreed to meet the mother figure of his direct line. It’d been decades since they’d literally bumped into one another and he could have continued that streak if it had been left to him. He’d been a bit surprised not to run into her during the war years but there’d been no sign of her.

 

“I’ve been mostly with the Master, Spike. Didn’t take time to play. He’s alone down there with nothing but religious fanatics surrounding him and you know what that can do to a person.”

 

“Nest isn’t quite a person now is he?”

 

“He’s my sire, my salvation.”

 

“Don’t think you’re anyone’s poster girl for the saved, pet.”

 

Darla took a seat in the booth in the darkest part of the pub and motioned for Spike to join her. “Dru and I had a nice reunion. Did some shopping and caught up. I hear she led you on a merry chase for a few years.”

 

“Nothin’ merry ‘bout it. Kept expectin’ to find she’d gotten herself turned into so much dust.”

 

Darla gave a half-grin and shook her head. “Lucky girl having such a devoted lover.”

 

Spike looked at her expecting to see a look showing her remark was meant as sarcasm but she actually looked a bit wistful. “Well, you have Peaches.”

 

“Haven’t seen him in years. I think he’s finally nothing but a memory, a ghost. A hundred years together and it means nothing to him.”

 

Spike gulped. Would the same thing happen to him one day? Would his love and his presence be tossed aside as if it had no meaning? Dru loved him but she didn’t love in the same way he did. It was possible and the thought chilled him.

 

“The only person who ever gave a damn about me is Heinrich Nest,” Darla muttered as if to herself. She was in an odd mood so Spike motioned for the waitress to bring a pitcher and let her talk.

 

“You listened to me once, back on that ship. Maybe that’s why I wanted to see you. No one listens and sometimes… sometimes…”

 

Spike understood that. There were many levels of lonely and he’d been to most of them at least once in his long life.

 

“I didn’t set out to be a whore you know. Thought to work in a respectable position, marry in my station and pump out a few brats along the way. Never expected jewels or riches but also didn’t expect that bitch to lie and have me thrown out like rubbish to starve either.” She poured a glass and drank deeply. “Of course I became the causal bride of the murdering scum of the earth like in that song about Aldonza. Heinrich saw me though. Laying there dying from syphilis, the town pariah. The right Reverend wouldn’t even hear my sins or consider forgiveness… even Magdalene got that much. No, just Heinrich.”

 

She looked into Spike’s eyes and he noted the pain there usually hidden behind cruelty and a casual air of indifference. “Figured I was damned already, might as well put off hell as long as I could.” She gave a bitter laugh. “A short human life with almost no choices and I finally had some agency! Die human and damned or become a soulless, damned creature who could make something, find some joys, before finally paying my dues.”

 

“Think you paid your dues long ago,” Spike consoled and poured her another drink. “So why did you want to see me. Can’t just be for a shoulder to cry on. Not your style that.”

 

Darla grinned, “No. It’s really not. I’m heading back to California, back to my sire. Heinrich isn’t what he once was. He’s gotten weak and a bit batty really. Still, I owe him everything. I’m not going to abandon him, not till either he or I am dust. You know they say the Hellmouth has healing properties for demons.”

 

Spike perked up at that. He wondered if there could be any healing for Dru.

 

“Hasn’t worked out that way for The Master. Then again he’s trapped, imprisoned. Maybe if he had HIS own agency it would be better.”

 

“Don’t quite get what he was doin’ there in the first place.”

 

Darla laughed. “You know the Order. All about the worship of the Old-Ones. Heinrich is as loyal to Maloker as I am to him. He decided to free him and any of the other Old-Ones still alive. I’m not really sure what he expected after that. Vampires are looked down on even below full demons you know. We were just Maloker’s parting gift to humanity, a way to leave chaos and pain with his exile to the deeper well.”

 

“Still not seein’ what you want with me.”

 

“He’s been asking for you. Well, for all his line. Thinks the time is coming soon when he can break free at last. Dru’s willing to come but she won’t without you.”

 

Spike sighed. He had no desire to go toady to the head of the Aurelian line, become a courtier in Nests court. He had no love for him and no loyalty to the whole bloody group of chanters. 

 

“Got plenty of incense burners and bellowin’ so-called prophets there already, why us?”

 

Darla laughed. “Guess I just get a bit lonely at times. Remember when we were all together. We had some good times, didn’t we?”

 

“And bad.”

 

“And bad,” she agreed. She played a bit in the foam on top of her glass. “Who else is there? Penn is psychotic even if I knew where he was. James and Elizabeth are nowhere to be found and Angel…”

 

“Sounds to me he’s the one you’re really missin’.”

 

Darla shrugged. “Love’s a funny thing.”

 

“Might do him some good seein’ you,” Spike encouraged. “Got any idea where he is?”

 

“I’ve heard rumors but nothing specific. I heard he slipped and ate some guy who was bleeding out in a diner robbery and ran off nearly mad with guilt.”

 

Spike refrained from the laughter he really wanted to indulge in. The lady was already hurting and he didn’t hate her so much that he wanted to make it worse. “Curse is a bitch.”

 

Darla looked at him and he saw her close herself off as he watched, “Well I can see you have no family loyalty. You’re not coming are you?”

 

Spike shook his head, “No pet. Gotta put Dru first and becommin’ a handmaiden to a half-mad vampire with apocalyptic urges isn’t what she needs. Just got her stable after Hitler released hell on earth.”

 

“If you change your mind. I’ll be in Sunnydale until he’s free.”

 

“Do what you need to, pet, but don’t see us joinin’ the party.”

 

Buffy was very glad Spike and Dru hadn’t been there that first year in Sunnydale. It was hard enough just fighting the vampires The Master had gathered without Spike’s record with Slayers.

 

*** 

 

“We’re not going with grandmummy?”

 

“No, Poodle. Right borin’ plan scuttling’ underground in a small town where the sun shines all the bloody time. We’re meant to live, not pay tribute to death.” Spike kissed her soundly. 

 

Dru pouted a bit but soon lost interest. She hadn’t been as besotted with Nest as Darla had been. Maybe the fact that her Daddy hated him came in handy.

 

“It’s weird but true. Spike really does embrace life for all the killing he has done, not to mention being technically dead himself.” Buffy thought of all she’d seen of the world and Spike over the decades. “Humans seem to embrace death a lot too, not just demons. I wonder why when there is so much beauty and fun to be had?”

 

*** 

 

The December chill had nothing on the frozen look on Spike’s face. Another one died young and for no reason.

 

He thought back to the 60s and the snarky, bright lad he’d met in Liverpool. Poor kid had nothing, not even his own mum and dad, just tons of talents and good mates. He’d conquered the world in a handful of years and become a legend even as he never seemed to fill the empty places in his soul. 

 

Spike lifted his glass and offered a silent toast to souls gone too soon, to talent destroyed before its time. “To John. Hope it’s better than anythin’ you ever did imagine.”

 

*** 

 

The Council had actually sent a team to check out Idol! They’d gotten wind that Spike played in bands, see the git doing his act and shoved a cross in his face after a gig! ‘Well maybe he’ll turn that into a song, make some dosh off the idiots' mistake,’ Spike laughed to himself.

 

“Think it’s time to leave fair London, Poodle. Sooner or later even the wankers at the Council will open their eyes and I’d rather not have the whole bunch of them out for our blood.”

 

“Where should we go, Spike?” 

 

He was thankful that Dru was in a good place mentally and emotionally and willing to let him lead this time around. No chasing wars and madmen this time.

 

“World’s a bloody mess. Not rightly sure.”

 

“We could go to Central America where Bianca’s little ones are,” Dru got a faraway look in her eye. Spike knew her intention was likely good but he’d bet a few quid that it wouldn’t take long for her demon to start dining on the kiddies and stirring up a disaster. 

 

“Those Sandinistas are a nasty bunch, Petal. Don’t want to risk you.”

 

“We could look for little brother. That Vietnam war is over now so ‘e’s prob’ly up for a spot of fun.”

 

“Heard he’s in Cambodia now tryin’ to do the heroic thing against the Khmer Rouge. You know how much of a warrior he is,” Spike smiled fondly. His protege really had a world filled with acceptable meals. One war began before the previous had even ended. Human monsters were to be found in all corners. Africa had it’s Idi Amin, the religious zealot in Iran was stirring up a mess in the Middle East, Central America was nothing but war and strife. “Hell the USSR is even invadin’ Afghanistan, now that’s a stupid move on their part. No one wins in that country! Blighters’ll be bogged down for an age then have to tuck tail and head home.”

 

Spike closed his eyes and tried to think of a good destination. He wanted more than just a place with plenty of likely dinners. “World’s filled with happy meals, can get ‘em anywhere. What’s the point of bein’ here if there’s naught but feedin’ to make you get up at night? Want some beauty, some poetry, music, dance. Things that make it worth the rest.”

 

Buffy knew that about him. Some vampires were just about the kill but not the ones she had come to truly know over the years, not the sane ones at any rate. Those that lived past their first few years had to develop some interests or they died early. Spike had made living his art form just as Angelus had made torture and killing his.

 

“What is it with humans anyway?” He yelled at the ceiling in frustration. “Everywhere war and massacres. Might as well put out a welcome mat for all the demons that draws into the mix to make it worse. Hell, we’re evil, what’s their excuse?”

 

“We could go to Rio, Spike. Never been to Carnival.”

 

Spike perked up and rushed to the calendar. “Looks like Lent starts in March. That’ll give us time to put things together.” He smiled in genuine happiness. “Brazil’s not even one of the places tryin’ to give Satan a run for his money right now. Perfect choice, pet!” He picked Dru up and swung her around kissing her into the giggles.

 

They were both laughing and a bit dizzy when he set her down. “Your Pixies aren’t tellin’ you ‘bout that changin’ any time soon are they?”

 

“Not saying a word to me, Spike, pinky swear.”

 

Good then.

 

*** 

 

January found them still in London making arrangements for their big move to South America. 

 

Spike had showered Dru with beautiful necklaces and rings as well as a cake fit for a queen then serenaded her with a rousing rendition of the “Happy Birthday” song. He’d invited their demon friends over for a small party to celebrate her day and as a farewell to London. It had been a wild party with music and laughter and a few tears. Dru had new dollies to pack for their trip. 

 

The 19th found Buffy really wishing someone could see her… anyone. She was out there in LA being born today and had never felt so alone in her life. Watching Spike celebrate Dru’s special day twisted the knife a bit. 

 

Dru put a small slice of her cake on a plate and a finger to her lips as she motioned towards a sleeping Spike. “Sunshine thinks no one knows, but I do. ‘Appy birthday, but you can’t ‘ave your present yet. ‘E’s still mummy’s for now.”

 

Buffy felt a tear course down her cheek. ‘Of course, it would be Dru.’ Buffy hadn’t remembered that she and Dru had their birthday’s either on the same day or close together until Spike’s party. That horrible year when she had unleashed Angelus Spike had given Dru Judge parts for her present. It hadn’t been a good birthday for anyone then. Still, it was a nice gesture for Dru to share the thought. “Happy birthday to you too, Drusilla… and thanks for sharing.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bianca_Jagger
> 
> Bianca Jagger https://youtu.be/Qk_s9Rw0Z0I 
> 
> Nicaraguan revolution https://youtu.be/IuBNV3lpdZY 
> 
> Many of the upheavals in Central and South America beginning in the late 1960s were aided and abetted (funded, trained, etc.) by the US CIA. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Central_American_crisis 
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Latin_America%E2%80%93United_States_relations
> 
> Sid Vicious https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sid_Vicious 
> 
> “Horse”, street slang for heroin https://americanaddictioncenters.org/heroin-treatment/slang-names
> 
> Billy Idol 1977 https://youtu.be/p59uuDyyMys (interview)
> 
> Billy Idol 1979 https://youtu.be/QWkZltugu4c (music clip)
> 
> Adam Ant Goody Two Shoes https://youtu.be/o41A91X5pns
> 
> New Wave “soundtrack" for the era: https://youtu.be/js4KSlREiao 
> 
> https://youtu.be/pCU9OXPIBRY 
> 
> James in The Wedding Band for new Wave look 
> 
> [](https://imgur.com/wjjFi9b)
> 
> Aldonza from Man of La Mancha https://youtu.be/-gGajPQj8ik 
> 
> John Lennon Imagine https://youtu.be/YkgkThdzX-8 
> 
> John’s death https://youtu.be/HQ68xik2pMo 
> 
> Pol Pot and Cambodia https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pol_Pot 
> 
> https://youtu.be/JRzhN3czvLk Khmer Rouge 
> 
> Idi Amin 
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Idi_Amin
> 
> https://youtu.be/GrxQYbk2LBI
> 
> Soviet/Afghan war https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Soviet%E2%80%93Afghan_War
> 
> https://youtu.be/xJs7udS-fZ4 
> 
> The Soviet invasion of Afghanistan saw the rise of the anti-USSR fighters called the Mujahideen https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mujahideen 
> 
> The Soviet invasion of Afghanistan led to the rise of anti-Soviet fighting forces armed and backed by the US CIA (sometimes trained as well). One of the much-lauded and trusted leaders of the Mujahideen was Osama Bin Laden. He was considered a valuable asset to the CIA and the West. That decade long war (The Soviet–Afghan War lasted over nine years, from December 1979 to February 1989) helped fuel the economic crisis in the USSR which ultimately led to the breakup of the Soviet Union and end to the Eastern European occupation and control by the USSR. Years later Bin Laden would become fiercely anti-USA leading to the attack on 9/11. Like Stalin and others before him, he transitioned from an ally of the USA to enemy in just a handful of years.
> 
> https://youtu.be/1gz3qTRd7xk
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Osama_bin_Laden 
> 
> https://youtu.be/D_aENuLFBn8
> 
> Rio de Janeiro https://youtu.be/TlWDF3BfUdo 
> 
> Footage from 1981 https://youtu.be/U8mpRKo6WZ4 
> 
> https://www.nytimes.com/1981/12/20/travel/what-s-doing-in-rio-de-janeiro.html
> 
> Carnival (from 2019) https://youtu.be/WqkUu3VMhF0 And bits from March,1981 https://youtu.be/XvbQrNis3SU 
> 
> Brazil was fairly peaceful in 1980 - 1981. The biggest violent story was on June 1, 1980. Mauro Milhomem, a Brazilian pilot, attempted to crash his Sertanejo-721 into the Hotel Presidente, owned by his mother-in-law after he had an argument with his wife the previous day due to her cheating on him. The plane failed to hit the target and hit instead into several other objects, ultimately crashing into an accounting office in front of a forum. Six people were killed and four were wounded


	43. Chapter 43

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [](https://imgur.com/WdxI7i1)  
> 

Chapter 43

Xander glanced nervously at the two girls locked in deep conversation. He wasn’t sure what to think about the newcomer. Tara seemed nice; shy and likable, but she was also, apparently, a pretty well-trained witch. The idea of her becoming besties with his girlfriend kind of unnerved him.

‘What if Ahn gets mad at me? I’ve seen what magic can do… hello… rat Buffy and the attack of the Sunnydale women when love spells go wrong! At least Ahn doesn’t have powers any more so she’s safe. Wills would never do anything to hurt me on purpose but who knows with this new girl. It’s the quiet ones you need to worry about isn’t it?’

“So a thousand years!” Tara’s eyes gleamed, her expression avid. “Oh, the things you must have seen!”

Anya preened under the positive and inviting manner of her new friend. It was nice to be validated, to have attention beyond sex or some new instruction or reminder of how to act and what to say. “I’ve seen and done plenty both in this dimension and dozens more,” she admitted.

“I’d love to hear your stories.” Tara smiled shyly.

“Better grab an air-sick bag first,” Willow suggested snidely and walked away from the pair.

Tara gave Willow a disapproving look. She had thought better of the other witch and the casual cruelty of her words was unexpected even if it seemed the standard relationship between the two women. “I take it your not close friends with each other?”

“Willow can’t stand me. Likely because I’m sleeping with Xander and even though she no longer wants him for herself, she doesn’t want him to want someone else. She’s a regular dog with a bone. That’s the reason I’m here and human. His last girlfriend called on me for a vengeance wish because even though he and Willow both had snuggle bunnies of their own they decided they wanted to get groiny with each other even though they’d had literally years to do that if they wanted.”

Xander heard the topic of conversation and jumped up to join Willow in the kitchen. The last thing he wanted was to listen to that disaster the way Anya would likely put it! ‘Doubt she’d even point her finger at Spike for that mess! If that buttinski of a bloodsucker hadn’t kidnapped us no one would have known or been hurt at all. Wills had it under control!’ He glared at the bubble encased frozen vampire in distaste.

“I’m pretty forgiving but I also understand why some people would call out for vengeance.” Tara had a pained far away look on her face that bespoke of a long story of her own.

“I had standards, of course. No willy-nilly vengeance from me. I’ll admit part of the appeal in taking the call from Xander’s ex eas that it would impact the Slayer. I didn’t know her then, naturally.”

Anya looked pensive. “I suppose now I’m an object lesson in Arashmaharr. ‘Oh! Look at Anyanka! She thought to interfere with the Chosen One and now she’s a pathetic human teenager unable to even order an ale in the tavern.’ I’m glad I can’t hear it. I once had a stellar reputation.”

Tara gave a half-grin. “Maybe you’ll save someone else from an even worse fate. Perhaps your old friends are grateful.”

“Oh, I doubt that. The vengeance business is highly competitive.”

“I would think it would be depressing seeing all the misery that happens to cause people to want revenge.”

“At first I suppose,” Anya shrugged. “Then you start to see that most people are asking for it and you can have fun with it… get creative.”

Tara raised a skeptical brow.

“Take my friend Ishmi. She has a wry sense of humor. Should have been a Djin instead of working for D’Hoffryn… they are the real masters of turning a wish on its ear!” Anya looked a bit wistful. “Anyway, Ishmi had a woman who was such a handful. Very ungrateful too. She had everything anyone should want… money, influence, a successful husband who was generous in and out of bed. Some cute, young gardener snubbed her advances because she was in her late thirties and said she was too old to interest him. She wished to ‘be hot’, one of the hottest I think she actually said. Well, Ishmi granted her wish by causing the ungrateful cow to enter early menopause with hot flashes enough t cook with!”

Tara tried not to laugh but the giggles escaped anyway. “I shouldn’t laugh but she did kind of have it coming.”

“Exactly!” Anya loved it that someone got the humor and justice of it instead of cringing at one of her stories. “Let me tell you how I caused the Bolshevik revolution,” Anya began. “It’s a classic!”

***  
“I’m afraid your girlfriend is going to make me look bad to Tara and I really like her,” Willow pouted.

“Nah, they’re just getting friendly because they both knew something about this Ellior goddess thing.”

“Eleos.”

“Whatever. The thingy Spike and Buffy were wrestling over anyway.” Xander patted Willow on the shoulder. “Besides, you’re the witchy dynamo with the side order of genius… what’s not to like?”

“I wasn’t ‘Miss Popularity’ iin school until Buffy came along.” Willow bit at her ragged fingernail.

“Their loss. They didn’t know they passed on a red-headed wonder-woman.”

Willow smiled at her loyal bestie. “You and Jesse were the only two kids who ever wanted me around. Even my parents were too busy for me most of the time. I was never enough for anybody else.”

“For who? The jocks and cheerleaders, the stuck-up Richie-Riches? Again… their loss. One day they’ll meet up at a reunion. They’ll realize that was the last good time of their life. They’ll be fat and bald, maybe not the cheerleaders with the baldness… not that bald women aren’t able to be hot, just think of Lt. Ilia in the first Star Trek movie… okay, I’m rambling… stop me now!”

Xander gave her a goofy grin. “My point is… was.. That long after their glory days are gone and they’re has-beens wanting to relive their high-school years you will still be my brilliant, beautiful and powerful best friend. You’ll be the one they all will wish they could be and you can snub them like they did you.”

***  
Giles had fallen asleep on the couch drooling a bit on the open pages of the book he’d been using for research. They had all come to the conclusion that the spell had to run its course and couldn’t be rushed to completion.

Giles had wanted to explore everything about it and the goddess anyway given Willow’s fast and loose handling of the magicks involved.

Willow still quailed remembering the dressing down Giles had given to her once she’d been forced to tell what she had done. That was followed by yet another lecture when the reason she’d bought the stature and done the spell had been revealed.

“Idiot girl,” Anya had butted in getting Willow’s back up in a way that Giles and his criticisms hadn’t.

“I am far from an idiot and it’s none of your business anyway.”

“I beg to differ about it being my business. Those demons you sic’d on Xander could have killed me too. As for your being an idiot… you can have a high IQ and still be a lamebrain at the same time.”

Willow’s face had been as scarlet as her hair. She had weathered many an insult over the years but NEVER about her mental abilities. Her whole life she’d been told how smart she was. Often she secretly feared that one day she’d mess up and everyone would think her high IQ scores were a fraud or just a series of lucky guesses on tests. The only thing Willow had in her life that had made her feel secure was the magic. It had come so easily to her and felt like a piece of her, long missing, had been returned. Now that was being criticized too.

“Ahn, you’re being harsh. Remember what we talked about?” Xander had moved between the two women in his life trying to deflect the barbs.

Anya rolled her eyes. “Blessed Odin! Don’t you get it? Do you think D’Hoffryn offers a position to just any witch, especially one who screws up her spells? No! He goes for those with character flaws he can exploit. I love the guy but that’s what he does. He saw me as a woman scorned not given to letting bygones be bygones. I was perfect for the cases he gave me.”

“I’m not vengeful,” Willow had protested.

“No. Besides being inept you are arrogant with the potential of full-blown hubris. You think you know better than anyone else about everything. Hoffy could have had a field day with you and your issues.”

“That’s not true! I was just hurt because Oz left.”

“Oz left because HE felt it was too dangerous to stay unless he learned to control the wolf. YOU are the one who thought you knew better what he needed and that he should stay!”

“Hey, ladies… bridge… water… can’t we move on?” Xander hated when they revealed how much animosity there was between them.

Giles had been listening and while more than happy to see the argument put to an end did have to consider what Anya had said about Willow’s real problem. It was true that the girl didn’t take criticism well and added to her evident innate power that could lead to her undoing if left uncorrected. 

“Good Lord, the very name of that spell-gone-wrong‘Will Be Done’ bespoke arrogance.’ She would bear watching.

Giles twitched in his sleep and let out a snort. His dreams were troubled and revolved around Willow following a path similar to the one he trod when only a bit older than she.

***  
Tara was feeling comfortable around Anya, something that was rare for the timid and insecure young woman. The older woman was frank, at times a bit more than socially acceptable but at least you knew she was being honest with you and deliberately hurtful or judgmental. Tara also sensed that even though the former demon had been around the group for a while, Anya was still mostly an outsider just as she was. 

Perhaps she’d be the ideal person to share her fears with. At least Anya wouldn’t hold her status as a demon against her and since she’d been around so long she might have answers to a lot of things that haunted and frightened Tara. Things she had no one to talk to about. “Can I ask you some things and ask you to say nothing to anyone else?” she ventured.  
Xander and Willow had gone out to pick up much-needed food and Mr. Giles was still deep in the arms of Morpheus. 

Anya blinked in surprise. ‘Is this what it’s like to have a friend?’ she wondered and then warmed at the thought. “Sure. Be warned, I give honest answers. Not everyone really wants that.”

“I do.”

“Ask away.”

“See… I...,” the frustrating stutter that plagued Tara when she became self-conscious struggled to the surface while Tara did her best to choke it back. “I’m a demon but I don’t know what kind. I thought y-you might be able to tell m-m-me since you’ve seen so much.”

Anya was struck dumb at first. “A demon?” She narrowed her eyes and looked very closely at the lovely girl who had rapidly become her first real friend.

“I admit I’ve not met every single kind of demon out there but… what on earth makes you think you’re a demon?”

“My d-d-daddy says all the women in the family are demons. It doesn’t show until we’re in our late teens though. I’m scared of what I’ll be.”

Anya had a pretty good idea of just what sort of monsters were in Tara’s family and they weren’t demons or female either.

“What was your mother like? I imagine she was past her teens when you were growing up,” Anya assumed the Cretin who headed the family had at least waited to wed until his bride was past childhood anyway.

Tara’s eyes misted and she smiled softly. “She was kind and lovely and very wise. She taught me earth magic and how to heal, how to respect nature and the laws of nature.”

Anya nodded. “No scales or tails or glowing eyes?”

Tara squirmed and felt terror at the idea of such a chance happening to her especially in public once her true nature exhibited. “Goddess, no!”

“As I thought.” Anya nodded. Anya knew how hard it could be to counter a lifetime of brainwashing and abuse. “Let me double-check.” She grabbed one of the many tomes on the table and paged to the spell she wanted. “I was a practitioner when I was human the first time… relax… I follow the rules.”

Anya spoke the spell and gazed deeply into Tara’s frightened eyes. When she emerged from the trance she cleared her throat. “First things first. One, you are NOT even partly demon. Human to the core.”

Tara looked startled. “But…”

“No buts, well maybe one very big butt… as in ass. You’ve been told a very nasty lie. I’ve not met your daddy but have known plenty like him over my lifetime. They want to control their women and use whatever it takes to do it. It’s a form of abuse. Sometimes it’s physical. Sometimes emotional or worse and usually it’s all of the above. They fear they can’t hold on to a woman if they aren’t in total control so they use whatever means necessary to hold tight.”

“None of the other women in my family went off to college. I got a scholarship and snuck out without telling them about it. I guess you could say I ran away.”

Anya wished she still had her powers or knew where to find Halfrek at the moment. “Tara, trust me. I even used that spell to be sure but you are not a demon, not now, now ever… well unless a vampire were to turn you or a werewolf bite yo that is. My guess is your daddy was afraid of the power your mother had as a natural witch, probably used religion and superstition to control her and that story to keep you under his thumb. It’s a good thing you left or you’d be marrying some cousin in a year or two and living under his control the rest of your life!”

Tara was horrified but it fit. Once she thought of the men and women in her family and their dynamic she could see it clearly. “So I’m not going to suddenly change into a demon, none of the women in my family will?”

“It doesn’t work that way. Well, a half Brackin won’t always show till mature but I’d have seen that in you right away. Demons… look, even demons that don’t show it from the start… well, it never is so selective that only one gender would inherit. If your family really were demons it would be the men as well as the women. Your daddy was feeding you poppycock, maybe he learned it from his daddy, who knows, but it’s still a load of hooey.”

Tara sagged in relief. “Oh thank you, Anya.” She pulled the startled woman into a fierce, grateful hug.

***  
The bucket of chicken was picked clean and containers of side dishes trashed as the weary group gazed at the vampire and Slayer in their unchanging tableau.

“Do you suppose they’re hungry?” Xander couldn’t imagine being unable to feed the need and hoped Buffy wasn’t going to waste away while under the spell.

Giles blinked in surprise. The concept of bodily needs of the two trapped beings hadn’t entered his mind. “Good Lord, I hope not.” He shook his head. “I wouldn’t imagine time would be like anything we experience so their needs are most likely in stasis.”

“I think that is how it works from what the books said,” Tara agreed. She had been the only one besides Giles to give diligent attention to the research. ‘A remarkably capable and helpful girl really,’ thought Giles.

“So Rupert, what do you plan to do about our resident willful and dangerous witch?” Anya asked earning a groan from Xander and furious glares from the witch in question.

“Do?” Giles looked baffled. “Why is it my responsibility to do anything except perhaps ward myself, my home and my Slayer from further mischief?”

Anya looked at him as if he were half-mad. “It’s your mess to fix since Willow showed how irresponsible she is with magic use.”

“I am a Watcher, assigned to train and assist the current Slayer and not…,” he sputtered in indignation. “It is not my job to…”

Anya cut him off in exasperation. “It IS your job. It became your responsibility the minute you let these human teenagers be part of your Slayer’s team. The moment you used their skills and energies in the fight that you signed up for and Buffy was called to they became your responsibility,” she huffed. “Men!” She slammed her hands on the table in irritation and stalked off to the kitchen mumbling to herself. “Want all the glory but none of the responsibility. I had plenty of Slayers with wishes about their Watchers over the years, Buster!”

Giles was gobsmacked. “Good Lord. Anya is right. This IS my responsibility.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fair warning to all you ladies who haven’t the “pleasure” yet https://www.webmd.com/menopause/guide/menopause-hot-flashes#1 
> 
> Russian Revolution “Cliff Notes” version https://youtu.be/cV9G1QUIm7w  
> Longer and more in-depth https://youtu.be/zXHybEb4b_o 
> 
> Richie Rich https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Richie_Rich_(comics)  
> Lt. Ilia, Star Trek the Motion Picture https://youtu.be/kHUZCVl28lg 
> 
> Xander’s love spell goes wrong clip https://youtu.be/7hpv1l3kES8  
> Anya’s angst https://youtu.be/rFhJW8EDynA  
> Canon Tara’s family secrets revealed https://youtu.be/F8fRpcD_sp0 
> 
> National Domestic Violence Hotline and webpage https://www.thehotline.org/  
> Signs of emotional abuse https://www.huffpost.com/entry/signs-of-emotional-abuse-relationship_n_5a999fbee4b0a0ba4ad31a4d 
> 
> https://youtu.be/logQdS2egeQ On emotional abuse  
> https://youtu.be/8vhx2hlko28 6 signs of an emotionally abusive relationship


	44. Chapter 44

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [](https://imgur.com/jF2hj4Z)

Chapter 44

 

“Bloody hell!” Spike looked around in confusion. A moment before he’d been having a fine tussle with a brassed off Slayer and now he was in some hospital starin’ down at a bunch of mewling infants.

 

“Where the fuck am I and how did I get here,” he shouted to the silent ceiling. To his surprise, his irate yelling attracted no notice from the masked natal nurse nor from the babies… all except one that is.

 

The baby girl was still red and pruny from her recent birth. Her eyes bothered him. They were too knowing for a newborn and they were fixed on him, following as he paced around the nursery It was unnerving.

 

“Stop that,” he ordered looming over the infant in question. “Didn’t they tell you in newborn orientation you can’t even focus till you’re older?” he glared at the small babe in the pink blanket who replied by blowing bubbles at him. Her eyes never left him and he’d never felt so exposed. 

 

“‘M not here to eat you so you can stop your starin’, alright,” he tried to reason with the little one. “You’re safe as houses and not cause of the chip. I never liked veal.”

 

The baby appeared to grin at that but Spike remembered hearing that at that age it was more likely just gas.

 

It didn’t take long for Spike to realize that somehow he’d not only transported from Sunnyhell to what looked like a much larger city’s hospital but had come over all ghostly as well. “Has to be the bloody witch again! Not enough to make the neutered vamp a lovesick sap over his mortal enemy but now don’t even have a body to call my own!” he was livid. 

 

The uncanny infant made him squirm. He would swear it knew what he was and what he was saying even if it… she… couldn’t so much as give out a decent goo-goo in return. “Not natural, not a bit of this whole farce is natural.”

 

“Shall we take this little darling in to see her mama?” The nurse reached for Spike’s staring partner.

 

She smiled at the lovely baby. “Do you want to meet your mommy, precious?”

 

“Yeah, let’s do that,” Spike clapped his hands making the baby startle at the sound only she seemed to hear. “Let’s see if any of this bolloxed up affair makes any sense.”

 

“You’re such a pretty little thing Baby Summers. Hope your mommy has a pretty name to go along with it.”

 

“Summers?” Spike stopped dead in his tracks. “When the hell did the Slayer have a brat?”

 

Spike followed the nurse pushing his one-baby fan club. ‘Kid must be filled with gas the way she’s grinnin’ at me. Daft for a Slayer’s kid to be makin’ up to a vamp that way.’

 

“Here’s your little angel, Mrs. Summers. Have you and your husband decided on a name yet?”

 

Joyce frowned slightly. Hank had just barely made it to the baby’s birth and hadn’t helped her settle on the name yet. He had become less and less attentive from the time they learned the baby’s gender but then again he’d started being more hands-off from the time Joyce had started to show.

 

Joyce dearly wanted the baby to be called Buffy after her very first best friend from childhood. Hank thought the name silly and preferred a more ‘professional’ sounding name but was undecided on just what that meant. He had suggested Deborah at one point but Joyce was determined not to let her precious little one share a name with her husband’s secretary!

 

The new mother set her jaw mulishly and made an ‘executive decision’. If Hank didn’t like it, well he should have been there! “Hank is working late again but you can put the name on the certificate and bracelet now so she can have her own name instead of ‘Baby Girl Summers’,” Joyce smiled at the nurse. “We’ve settled on Buffy Anne.”

 

“Oh, that’s a sweet name for a sweet baby,” the nurse beamed. “Hello Buffy,” she cooed at the infant.

 

Spike had been standing there utterly gobsmacked. ‘What kind of fresh hell is this? Not the Slayers brat but the Slayer herself? How the bleedin’ hell did I do a Doctor Who? And Why?’

 

Spike seemed stuck to the baby. No matter how he tried to leave, he could only get a room or two away before being yanked back. It was frustrating enough not having a body, he could do with a smoke or two. The company, in spite of all the directed gurgles and bubble blowing, was less than stimulating.

 

All the times he’d imagined seeing the Slayer bare… and, yeah… evil vampire here, he’d imagined it… anyway, he’d never imagined it would be watching her nappies get changed. “Things get back to normal and I’m gonna be merciless with all the ammo this bit of Red’s wonky magic’s givin’ me. Should reward the bumblin’ bint for that alone.”

 

*** 

 

The proud papa finally made an appearance. He was less than pleased at the name too. “My God, Joyce, the least you could have done was make it Elizabeth!” 

 

“I like Buffy. It’s a happy-sounding name, makes you smile just saying it. Besides, if it mattered that much to you maybe you should have been here or at least settled on a name when I asked you. I want my daughter to have a real name before we get discharged from here.”

 

“Well, it’s not worth the hassle to change it now,” he muttered then turned an ingratiating smile on his unhappy wife. “You were pretty set on Buffy anyway.”

 

Slightly mollified by his attitude Joyce gushed, “Isn’t she beautiful?”

 

“Hank glanced at his sleeping daughter and shrugged. “Babies need to grow into their looks, Joy, at this age you can’t tell one from another really.”

 

Joyce looked shocked and hurt. “I’d know her in a room filled with babies!”

 

“Me too,” Spike glared at the fairly uninterested dad.

 

“You’re just upset that our first is a girl. I know you were set on a boy. That’s why you had no preference for names. We couldn’t very call her Hank, Jr.”

 

Buffy woke, her face scrunched in preparation for making her desires known. Hank looked terrified and backed towards the door. “Gotta go make a quick call, hon, be back in a flash.”

 

“Wanker!” Curious, Spike followed Hank into the hall. ‘Thought so. Just didn’t want to face dirty nappies.’

 

“Is everything alright, Mr. Summers?” The floor nurse was cute as a button and clearly taken with the handsome new father.

 

“Yeah. Just an adjustment.” He sighed deeply and let his shoulder sag a bit as if over-burdened. “My wife can be a bit… touchy… when frustrated.” He gave the comely nurse a shoes-to-chignon once-over, clearly liking what he saw. “Good thing she didn’t decide to become a nurse. She wouldn’t have the calm, professional manner you show.”

 

The girl blushed at the compliment and Hank turned on a 100-watt smile.

 

“What kind of Plonker flirts with the nurse when his wife’s just given him a child and is in the next room?”

 

Spike went back in with Joyce and Buffy. “You both deserve better. That explains why there’s no dad in the picture. Don’t look like he was much there from the start.” Spike shook his head in disapproval.

 

The baby was looking at him again. “Don’t worry, pet, won’t be rubbin’ this in later. Nothin’ funny ‘bout havin’ a soddin’ Pillock for a pop. Least I had parents that loved me and I knew it. Was their world ‘till father passed and same with mum ‘till I ruined it all. Nothin’ funny ‘bout that.” He looked at the tiny, helpless, baby with sympathy.

 

It made Spike angry for Buffy and for Joyce. That lady had been kind to him. ‘Real proper lady and a bit of a looker too. Man’s an idiot to not see what he’s got with his girls.’

 

*** 

 

The toddler was impossibly cute. All big green eyes and blonde curls and sweet disposition.

 

Fortunately, she was unaware of the cold war between her parents. Joyce doted on her baby girl and Buffy craved her daddy’s attention. ‘Poor tyke was always reachin’ for the Berk. Good thing he sees it annoys Joyce or he’d likely ignore the bitty thing and break her heart.’

 

Hank had a cunning weapon in his cold war arsenal… Buffy’s clear adoration. He loved pointing out that for all of Joyce’s devotion, Buffy was a daddy’s girl acting like he’d hung the moon just for her! The only good thing about it was that Buffy did get the attention from him that she craved and Hank spent more time at home flaunting his daughter's affections.

 

Joyce returned to college to finish her degree in Art History, a major looked down on by her ambitious husband. Evidently she’d dropped out to marry Hank and work to support his post-graduate work while still a few credits shy of her own degree. “Seems a waste, Joyce. I mean, what are you going to do with that? Work at a museum or gallery?” He laughed at her efforts making her feel small and unimportant.

 

“Maybe I’ll run one,” she snapped.

 

It had rankled Hank that he’d not made partner even though his case wins were above average. It never occurred to him that his flirts with the law clerks and more attractive clients had been noticed by the senior partners. Hank was an exceptionally good lawyer and a financial asset to the firm but his wandering eye and not quite over the line banter with the prettier females convinced them that he wasn’t senior management material. They made their fortunes and reputation bringing lawsuits to a successful conclusion. They had no desire to be on the other end of one.

 

Hank Summers was a man to be watched, not promoted… unless, perhaps, to one of the European offices where his behavior was more acceptable. All things in their own time, of course. After all, he and his lovely wife had just started their family. Perhaps he’d settle down.

 

*** 

 

Spike watched Joyce pick up and then put down the bottle of Cabernet she’d impulsively purchased. A deep frown furrowed her brow as she looked from the bottle to the clock and then stole a glance up the stairs towards the nursery.

 

It was near enough to Buffy’s bedtime for Joyce to pull herself away from the siren's call of the numbing bliss offered by the wine.

 

She had already turned back the heat on the oven as far as possible and dinner would still likely be ruined. She’d hoped Hank would at least call to say how late he was going to be but he hadn’t, as usual. She’d given up calling him. The arguments and resentments over her ‘hen-pecking’ were too much for her to initiate more of the same.

 

“I should just not bother with fixing dinner at all. Throw something together for him when or if he show’s up,” she cried. “Then he’d complain that I had all day to do nothing and couldn’t even put out a decent meal.” She felt defeated and useless this time crying in reality.

 

*** 

 

Joyce sat up and panted a bit from the exertion. She had begun exercising to MTV. Right leg lifts during one music video, left leg lifts during the next, body curls during the third then rest through the ’Music News’ segment and repeat. 

 

“Oh, this one’s great for crunches,” Joyce smiled as “Solid Rock” began on the screen. Her stomach was nearly flat again even though it had never been too flabby after the baby.

 

“Hank always liked my legs. Maybe if I get toned he’ll notice. I found a great dress at Neiman Marcus with splits up the sides that should knock him off his seat.”

 

Spike didn’t see a thing wrong with how she looked already. “Gilding the lily there, Joyce. Problem’s with him, not you.”

 

Spike watched the lovely woman work up a sweat to everything from “Hungry Like A Wolf” and Bowie’s “Let’s Dance” to Michael Jackson, less the other four, and his catchy “Billie Jean”. It saddened him watching her work so hard trying to regain the attention of her flighty husband. He truly didn’t deserve her.

 

Spike had noticed Hank spending more time at the office lately and had noted when dropping by with Joyce and Buffy, that he had a new law clerk. She was a shapely young brunette bombshell with a beauty pageant smile. Spike had a feeling that was the ‘case’ that the Berk was actually working on most nights. 

 

Some men began to see their wives as a “mother” instead of a warm-blood, desirable, woman after a birth. It was pretty clear that for whatever reason, Hank had stopped seeing Joyce as anyone desirable to him. He subtly put down her looks, her efforts, her value as anything except her mothering skills. So far he had no complaints about how she tended to Buffy.

 

He discouraged Joyce’s hopes and aspirations and stuck a pin in her dreams every time she expressed them all while downplaying the things she did to make a comfortable home for them.

 

Oh, he trusted her to be a proper hostess or companion at company parties and dinners. He didn’t bother to let her know she did him proud but at least he didn’t say anything negative.

 

Joyce had noticed his roving eye, he did little to hide it and got defensive when she’d object. “I’ve never done a thing you could complain about Joyce. Don’t blame me for your shortcomings and insecurities,” he would deflect.

 

“Fancies himself a ladies man,” Spike sneered. “He’s not cheated on her… yet… but he’d obviously been shopping. Always shopping.” Spike wanted to take a good bite out of the bastard.

 

***

 

Spike watched as Joyce went from a couple of glasses of wine in the evening to some nights having to hide the empty bottle before crying herself to sleep waiting for the door to open and Hank to slip in seemingly unnoticed. Joyce often noticed, Spike ALWAYS did.

 

He noticed a lot of things. Hank using an old toothbrush to scrub our lipstick marks on his collar more than once. He noticed the guilty looks directed at the sleeping Joyce. He noticed the extra toys and attention given to Buffy when he was home on weekends in an effort to stay number one with his child. He noticed himself growing more and more angry at the miserable bastard who didn’t know when he had it good.

 

It was like watching a slow-moving train wreck, one that Spike couldn’t stop from happening no matter how he wished he could.

 

“No wonder the Slayer practically worships her Watcher. I’ll give it to old Rupert, he’s more of a doting dad where it counts than this asshole ever was. Toys and such are fine but no substitute for real caring. Sooner or later a kid catches on to it.” Spike felt a twinge of regret for how obnoxious he’d been to Giles who had, after all, allowed him refuge in his home. “Decent sort really though I’d never tell him that. Glad the Slayer has him. Not like so many of the Tweed Twits I’ve seen. Genuinely cares about his girl.”

 

*** 

Buffy had begun to talk and right after “ma-ma” and “da” had come “fwen”. No one knew who she meant since her gaze seemed fixed on empty space, but Spike knew and was shocked to feel his heart swell with unexpected tenderness and pride.

 

She tried her hardest to touch him often ending the attempt with frustrated tears.

 

She didn’t seem to actually hear him but did seem content to have her mute (to her) friend there when she looked around for him. He was a constant with the wee girl. He gave no presents but did give his presence and that mattered to her a lot.

 

Once Spike realized that she could see him he tried to convey his thoughts and feelings with his expressions and she seemed to have a knack for understanding his different looks and what they meant.

 

One day in irritation Spike felt himself go into game face and feared he might have terrified the child only to find Buffy laughing and trying to touch his demon face.

 

That became his ‘fwen mad’ expression from then on and as long as Buffy knew he wasn’t angry with her she didn’t mind a bit. Since Spike was never angry with the little darling it was never an issue either.

 

Joyce looked at Buffy fondly as her toddler poured invisible tea for her invisible friend. Joyce was used to it since Buffy seemed to have one almost from the start.

 

“So is your friend a pretty princess?”

 

Buffy laughed at Spike’s affronted look and growly expression.

 

“No, mama. My fwen is pwetty but he has white hair and fangs.” Buffy replied quite seriously much to Spike’s pride and amusement.

 

“Oh,” Joyce looked confused. “That’s nice dear.” She shrugged and figured that Buffy had decided on a polar bear for her imaginary friend. ‘She did love them at the zoo. Wanted to get in the exhibit with them to play.’

 

*** 

 

Spike wished he could touch the little charmer. He let her set a place at her tea-time table for him whenever she wished and mimed what he could in play with her but couldn’t move physical matter no matter how hard he tried. He wished he could make her toys fly and dance to amuse and charm her as much as she amused and charmed him.

 

He really wished he could hold and comfort her when she’d cry more than anything.

 

She was beginning to pick up on the tension between her mom and dad and also notice when Hank was absent from their home. Joyce’s drinking took place after Buffy was asleep but the child had experienced a couple of times when she had called out for her mum only to get no reply as Joyce was more passed-out than asleep. Yeah, those were the times that Spike most wished he could touch her, hold her or at least distract her. “Poor wee lamb. No idea what’s going on just that it’s not right.”

 

Spike did the only thing he could and smiled down on the child in a way that seemed to calm her a bit and held vigil while she slept.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Records indicate that 2,652 girls in the United States have been named Buffy since 1880.
> 
> The greatest number of people were given this name in 1972, when 320 people in the U.S. were given the name Buffy. http://www.babynameshub.com/girl-names/Buffy.html 
> 
> One hour unedited MTV from 1982 https://youtu.be/Ji3rFzGliM0 
> 
> From 1983:
> 
> Goanna, “Solid Rock” https://youtu.be/tSNxFGW09Mo 
> 
> Duran, Duran, “Hungry Like the Wolf” https://youtu.be/oJL-lCzEXgI 
> 
> David Bowie, “Let’s Dance” https://youtu.be/VbD_kBJc_gI 
> 
> Michael Jackson, “Billie Jean” https://youtu.be/Zi_XLOBDo_Y 
> 
> The year in music 1983 http://eightiesclub.tripod.com/id199.htm 
> 
> https://consumer.healthday.com/men-s-health-information-24/fatherhood-health-news-302/new-dads-interest-in-sex-often-drops-after-childbirth-study-678800.html
> 
> https://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/the-baby-came-but-the-sex-went-many-marriages-fail-in-the-18-months-after-childbirth-often-because-1531894.html
> 
> https://www.thedailybeast.com/why-some-men-go-nuts-after-their-wives-give-birth 
> 
> https://time.com/4286575/sexual-harassment-before-anita-hill/


	45. Chapter 45

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [](https://imgur.com/StuLC8F)

Chapter 45

*** 

[](https://imgur.com/uwG3VQu)

Rio at Carnival! Any image Buffy had in her mind at those words failed to do justice to the actual reality.

The last hurrah before Lent. Last call for indulging in the pleasures of the flesh… all of them, sometimes all at once. Lent, after all, was serious business. Time to give up the things of earth and once more bargain with God to forgive your soul.

Ahhh but those days leading up to it? THOSE were serious too. 40 days of saying ‘no’ were looming and one had to store sin away as a squirrel does nuts before winter. No one did it like Rio!

Something for everyone, human and demon and all of it on display. People even welcomed the bite of vampires, it was all just a part of the scene… another delicious experience to savor. Everywhere Buffy looked was eye candy. 

Dru’s eyes glittered, her demon a glutton for the literal buffet of sex, blood, and other offerings.

Spike played too. He was still emotionally faithful to his beloved, always would be, but if baby wanted to play and insisted he join in… well, wasn’t it all just a part of pleasing his lady? Couldn’t be called cheating when Dru dragged him into the situation and presented him with the playmate of her choosing.

He hadn’t been involved in this level of decadence since the early days with Angelus and Darla. He hadn’t enjoyed it then but now, with his Princess so filled with glee and near sanity he didn’t mind a bit.

He learned quickly how to hold back a bit with the humans. They would be fragile and this play didn’t involve inflicting pain. It took some of the enjoyment out of it since Spike wasn’t used to having to rein in his passions but the heat of a human almost made up for it.

The demons Dru chose were able to indulge in full out sex but often their pleasures were more along the lines of Angelus and Darla’s and Spike much preferred pleasure to pain. Dru, though, was in her element.

Hunting to feed had the feel of a party as well. It reminded Spike a lot of the wonderful weekend in New York in the late 60s. The music was different, well, Santana had put the Latin vibe into Woodstock but this was all hot Latin music with a side dish of Africa for spice. It was yummy.

Thanks to the abundance of perfectly willing meals, neither of Buffy’s vampires resorted to murder. Some of their donors even begged for another go.

“I never enjoyed being bitten,” Buffy mused. “Then again, the Master was killing me and Angel was not in his right mind. Still, you’d think that if Spike and Dru can make it feel good enough they ask for it, why didn’t Angel make it feel good once he was not at death’s door? For that matter, why didn’t he stop himself before nearly killing me? Even Dru stops herself unless she actually wants to leave a corpse.”

***   
They’d move around a bit after Carnival had ended. Dru wanted to explore South America having found Brazil to her liking.

“Rule bloody Britannia and fuck that demon bitch Thatcher!” Spike was pissed off that once more human politics had made their accents a liability. “Hard enough keepin’ a low profile as a vamp without gettin’ the evil eye for soundin’ like home.”

They’d been enjoying Argentina. “Havin’ a perfectly good time of it till they decided to go to fucking war over a fairly useless island with only a few thousand residents. Let the Argentinians have the soddin’ whole of it. Sad day when the ruddy empire depends on holdin’ one tiny bit of real estate at the arse end of the world.”

“Is the Prime Minister truly a demon, Spike?” Dru inquired with mild interest. In all honesty, she’d tuned out many of Spike’s rants since the Falklands had become a military action and all people British were persona non grata to the Argentinians. So confusing with the people there in Buenos Aires calling the troublesome island Malvinas and the British insisting it was the Falklands. Dru found the entire situation tiresome.

“Course she is! Just have to look at her and give a listen to figure that out. Givin’ demons a bad name too.”

Close to a thousand deaths in the ten-week war won by the British had done nothing to improve the attitude of the Argentinians towards anyone who sounded like the victors. That is what led them to a multi-country tour of South America. Spike felt a bit like the days of the Great War or perhaps like a gypsy. He really had hoped to put down roots for a while at least and Iron Knickers Maggie had bolloxed it all up to hold on to a place few knew or cared about.

***   
“Got us a ride on one of Seal’s planes, Poodle. He’s flyin’ out of Columbia headed north.”

Dru’s eyes glittered. “Think ‘e’ll let us ‘ave a taste of ‘is cargo?” Spike’s Princess had discovered the pleasures of cocaine and flying with a major smuggler afforded all sorts of opportunities to indulge the vice.

Barry Seal had ferried the vampires from time to time as he and his CIA/DEA aided drug running operation made trips for the Medellin cartel. The former TWA pilot was a criminal but had saved his own bacon by working with the authorities at least on paper. Spike had liked the fellas daring, his seat-of-the-pants way of living but had warned him about trusting the deals made by any government.

One of Barry’s current contacts was a shifty character named Oliver North who had a hard-on to meddle with the ongoing civil war in Nicaragua. Just because the man was in the military didn’t mean he was a man of honor and Seal would do well to watch his back. 

Sooner or later Spike figured that Seal would meet a violent end. In the meantime he was amusing company and a handy means of moving about without worrying about pesky things like paperwork.

*** 

Dru and Spike found themselves hunkered down in one of Seal’s hangers in the States awaiting a plane south to Mexico. Dru was dancing to a tune only she could hear and Spike was watching the TV in the office. Buffy was as delighted as Spike to find that Barry had cable and even the better channels.

“Poodle, Robin of Sherwood’s comin’ on. Maybe put away your dancin’ partner and rest a bit. You like that Michael Praed bloke.”

So did Buffy. “Totally drool worthy,” she nodded. The show was good and Buffy swore she’d hunt down tapes once she was back in her normal world. The mix of mythology, magic and the legends of Robin Hood was addictive and the main actor was gorgeous. 

Spike was getting stir-crazy waiting for safe transport. He didn’t mind a bit of a high but hadn’t taken to it like Dru. The white power fed her pixies, or so she claimed. 

“Sure you don’t want to just head north, Poodle? Lots of sunshine south of the border, might be nice to try something a bit more friendly for a bit, eh?”

“Sunshine’s everywhere,” Dru sing-songed. “Everywhere and nowhere, then and now and soon.”

“Right,” Spike shook his head. No point in trying to get anything like a sensible answer when Dru had been into the cargo. “Mexico it is then.”

Buffy didn’t mind. She’d been seeing a lot of the world she never would have had the opportunity to see had she not been caught in this spell. She would have loved to be able to take advantage of that sunshine and some of the beaches. Still Spike and Dru managed to show her the world in their own way even if unknowingly. As for the beaches… well they were beautiful with the moonlight too.

***   
Mexico was beautiful and peaceful as they stayed in small towns and seaside areas munching on tourists and enjoying long languid days inside and moonlit nights soaking up the music and the beauty that was all around.

Spike had his roots at last for a couple of years at least. He’d even learned to play his guitar Spanish style from an elderly, half-blind man at the Cantina downstairs from their flat. 

Their old transport wasn’t available any longer. Seal hadn’t listened to Spike’s warnings and had been murdered while doing public service as part of his sentence. The Cartel had been tipped off about his undercover shenanigans and his fate was sealed. ‘Bet it was that fucker North who leaked,’ Spike muttered. 

One good thing that came from that was to wean Dru from her indulgence in cocaine. She’d played with it from her Disco Queen days back in the 70s but having a pet drug smuggler had only made it more accessible. Spike preferred his darling drug free. Her unique mental and emotional states didn’t need any artificial encouragement. She was also more willing to settle down at least for a while. 

Sayulita was beautiful with miles of coast and plenty of art and wildlife but even better, it was only about 40km to Puerto Vallarta with the hundreds of tourists including many right off of Dru’s ‘Love Boat’ and it’s copycats all there for the tasting. It was easy to go for a hunt and still be home in their quiet community with none the wiser. Life had been sweet. 

Dru was getting restless again and with rumors that the USSR was about to collapse under the financial mess spurred on by their disastrous foray into Afghanistan leaving Eastern Europe open to the west for the first time since Stalin she was urging Spike to take her back to Europe to watch the lovely mess of the fall.

“Twill be so exciting, Spike. Watchin’ the new world being born all over again.” Dru smiled wickedly. “So much chaos!”

Spike had to agree… well, not about the chaos, that usually went bad places. Still, it did sound exciting without being dangerous so... why not? Could troll about Eastern Europe, all the old haunts from the pre-war years. See what all that time behind the “Iron Curtain” had done to change things about. See what had been rebuilt and what remained from centuries past. Dru loved the old capitals, Vienna, Budapest, Prague. “Sure, Pet. Sounds lovely.”

***

[](https://imgur.com/fj7GvwL)

Spike looked around in amazement. The farm seemed frozen in time as immortal as he was yet less unchanging. 

This was the first… only… place where a human had treated three vampires with dignity, friendship and respect all while knowing what they were. Of course that was all due to Sam, but still, the memory was a sweet one. Even Dru had pulled out that memory over the years to cherish.

Bernie was old now, his body looking even older than it truly was. Years of hard manual labor in all kinds of weather had taken its toll. His Jussie fussed around him trying to get him to just relax and enjoy having Joyce and little Buffy there but the old man wasn’t having any of her coddling.

“Been working my whole life, Dumpling, day I stop’s the day I die.”

“Mom, you might as well give up and just be glad he’s letting Walter do the heavy lifting.”

“He’s only testing him to see if he’s fit to take over the farm completely one day,” teased Jussie. “You remember the hoops Wally had to jump through before your daddy decided he was worthy enough to marry his eldest precious baby girl.”

Arlene grinned. “Reckon the jury’s still out on that one.”

“He’s a damned sight more worthy than that Hank who snuck in like a chicken hawk and plundered my baby,” Bernie snarled. “God knows that one doesn’t see gold when it’s right in front of him.”

Joyce flushed and squirmed. She was torn between shame and the desire to defend the man she still loved in spite of his cheating nature. “Daddy…”

“Don’t be daddying me, young lady. You’d feel the same if some bounder treated our little Buffy this way one day.”

Joyce bit back the protestation that Buffy wouldn’t make the same mistakes she’d made, wouldn’t let the man she loved down so that he’d slip through her fingers. Buffy was beautiful and clever and engaging even at six. All the little boys adored her.

“Trouble is he thinks too much of himself and his charms and too little of you and yours. Always did seem a bit full of himself but as long as you were happy I kept my yap shut.”

Joyce looked out the window where Buffy and her cousin Celia were playing some kind of super-hero game with Buffy rescuing her cousin from certain doom completely oblivious to the adult drama around them. Joyce wanted to keep it that way. As far as Buffy knew, they were merely having a short end-of-summer vacation at grandma and grandpa’s farm. “Please don’t say anything about Hank in front of Buffy, pop. She adores her daddy.”

“Made a point to court her didn’t he? Turn on the charm and have her eating out of his hand? If he really was a good father he’d be there for her mom.”

Jussie looked distraught. She agreed with her husband but understood Joyce’s need to not have Buffy become too aware of the cracks in her parent’s marriage. “We can talk about things later, when the girls are asleep, Bernie.”

“Talk won’t fix this but fine.” Bernie muttered, “Back in the day a horsewhip would be in order.”

Spike agreed fully. There were always cheaters, even in his day and he’d always looked down on them. Few things hurt more than wounds to the heart. He’d hated seeing Joyce losing her confidence and sparkle. Spike had come to hate the man who made this lovely woman start to believe there was something lacking in HER instead of seeing her husband for the philanderer that he was at heart. ‘He’s the kind that’ll always be lookin’ at greener pastures no matter what. Wish she’d see that before he pulls her any further down. ‘F I had a body I’d help ole’ Bernie take him behind the shed.’

Joyce had walked into a compromising situation at Hank’s office when she’d dropped by and the argument had gone ballistic in no time. Hank had accused Joyce of being the reason for his roving eyes and now hands. She’d let herself go according to Hank, she drank too much, he even accused her of being a bloody Harpy! Spike had wanted to call down a couple of real Harpies to illustrate how off the mark the bastard was. ‘Can’t even do that in the condition I’m in. Bloody useless Git!’

He’d been furious at the mind games Hank even played on his vulnerable little girl but glad to see that Joyce still had the gumption to rise to Buffy’s defense when that happened.

Buffy’s wee heart had broken and she’d sobbed herself to sleep when Hank had tugged on her brownish pigtail and asked where his ‘blonde little princess’ had gone. “Mouse hair,” he’d teased but not in a genuine show of good humor. He knew his words hurt. 

“Hank!” Joyce exploded as Buffy ran from the room. “Most children’s hair darkens from blonde as they get older. Buffy is beautiful. There is nothing wrong with her.”

“Guess I just thought with all that Nordic blood you Eriksons are so proud of I’d have a family of blonde bombshells that everyone’d envy. Brown is so… average… you must realize that yourself since you rely on Miss Clairol.” 

“Buffy is only six, Hank! I am not bleaching her hair so you can have whatever the hell look you think you want in the family pictures. Get over it and go apologize to your daughter.” 

“She’ll get over it.” 

“Wonder how the Berk’d look bald? Get my body back and we’ll have to see.” Bastards all glib charm and manipulation. Spike thought of the grown Buffy and shook his head. “No wonder she colors her hair even when there’s not a bit of grey in it.”

Spike watched as Hank coaxed Buffy back into his fanclub with sweet words and a stuffed pig. The Plonker was good at the old push-pull game. Reel her in with his charm then hold her away making her want his attention even more.

Spike thought about what kind of programming that was likely to shove in a kid’s subconscious. Things like that planted when she was just a wee tyke had to take a toll. ‘Explains how bloody Peaches and his methods worked so well. She was conditioned already by her daddy-not-so-dearest. Same glib charm and makin’ her dance to his tune had her ripe to be manipulated by a master like Angelus thanks to this fucker. Reason the Slayer takes all the blame for that disaster. Groomed for it. Perfectly primed for his special brand of mind fuckery!”

Spike thought of the similarities between Buffy’s old man and her first lover. It wasn’t that Buffy was looking for a daddy substitute but there were things that Spike could see that worked in Angel’s favor in his courtship dances. Both men put on the airs of wisdom and worldly panache. Both were great at making a woman (or girl) feel like the center of their universe only to push them away. Both came and went in the lives of those who loved them, showering lots of attention then offering none at all and no explanation making the one left behind feel they were the one lacking. Both gave lip service to love but didn’t have a clue how to truly give, how to care. Both claimed to offer guidance but really offered nothing but the occasional critique. Both left for their own selfish reasons but made it seem like they were making the adult decision for the greater good. “Yeah, Slayer was ready made for soddin’ Peaches to screw with.”

***   
“Sometimes my friend goes to see mommy and daddy but most times he stays with me.” Buffy was surprised her cousin couldn’t see him either. She had accepted that the adults couldn’t but Celia was her age.

‘Must think anybody young can grab a gander.’ Spike grinned.

Celia believed Buffy, of course. Buffy wasn’t the sort to play tricks on a friend. If she said there was a tall white haired invisible man around then there was one.

Joyce watched the girls play and was a bit sad that Buffy hadn’t outgrown her invisible playmate. She’d not worried about it much at home because Buffy spent so much time having to play alone. Their neighborhood had children but they were all quite a bit older than Buffy and not interested in letting the smaller girl join in their games. ‘Just as well. Buffy could get hurt.’

Joyce had hoped that having Celia to play with would be just what Buffy needed to let go of her imaginary best friend. Instead she had Celia believing too even if the other child didn’t claim to actually see Buffy’s fluffy buddy.

“Buffy you know that make believe isn’t the same as real.”

“Course mommy. There are no fairy princesses or dragons or monsters under the bed and if I kiss a frog it’ll only be icky and not make it into a prince,” Buffy nodded solemly.

“Oh, sweetheart, you’ll learn soon enough about monsters and dragons,” Spike shook his head. “Dead right about frogs though and princesses tend towards the bonkers.”

“Why don’t you just let go of your polar bear now that you have Celia to play with?” Joyce feared it was something she’d neglected as a mother that caused her baby to cling to her imagination this way. Now that Buffy was about to start school it wouldn’t do to have Buffy talking about having imaginary bears at her tea parties!

Buffy looked at Spike and sighed. ‘Grown ups are so blind!’ Mommy just didn’t understand,’ Buffy thought in sadness. “Aunt Lene says my friend is prob’ly my guardian angel. She says we all have them.”

Spike nearly choked. “Not bloody likely. More bleedin’ ice bear than any kind of Angel, ‘cept maybe the fallen kind.”

“She said only very special little girls get to see them though.” Buffy crossed her arms and jutted out her chin defying her mom to dispute the wisdom of Auntie Arlene. “She said yours saved you from a truck when you was my age! Even she seed him! His lady angel friend gave you both dolls!”

Buffy grinned in triumph. How could her mommy dispute facts like that? There was even evidence, she’d seen the doll herself.

Joyce sighed. Arlene hadn’t seen anything wrong with Buffy’s vivid imagination. Living in the country she had no idea how cruel kids could be especially in a big city where they didn’t all grow up together.

Buffy frowned, “I can’t touch mine. Aunt Lene said yours carried you,” she pouted and felt a twinge of jealousy. “But I can see him anyway! Did yours have fangs like mine or wings?”

Well maybe telling others about a guardian angel instead of a polar bear would be a little better at least. “No, mine didn’t have wings either as I recall. It’s been a long time ago.”

“I know mommy. It was ages and ages and ages ago when you was my age,” Buffy nodded in understanding.

“Yes, well. Not THAT long ago missy!”

Celia had been listening with interest. “What do you call your angel? What’s his name?”

“He don’t got a name or least he hasn’t told me.” Buffy whispered, “He can’t talk either. Maybe it’s super secret angel laws or something. Did yours talk mommy?”

“Well yes, but mostly to my daddy.” Joyce was uncomfortable. All this talk about the perfectly normal man who saved her life wasn’t helping to wean Buffy from her make-believe world. “Besides, it wasn’t an angel who saved me, it was a very nice man.”

“Oh,” Buffy looked disappointed.

“What do you call yours, Buffy?” Celia pressed.

Buffy looked upset. “I never thought to call him anything but friend. I guess I could call him Angel.”

Spike’s eyes rolled and he fumed going into game face. “No way Slayer! Not answering to that even if you don’t know what you’re sayin’.”

Buffy noticed his ‘mad face’ and bit her lip. “Guess he doesn’t like that name. ‘Sides… Angel’s a girls name! Maybe I’ll just call him Charlie.”

Spike shook off the bumpies. “Suppose Charlie’s alright, better than sharin' a name with the prancing Ponce.”

Buffy saw that her angel friend seemed to take that name better. “‘K, Charlie it is then.”

***   
Hank showed up much to Bernie’s ire. In spite of her dad’s insistence that they had a perfectly good home there in Illinois Joyce decided to accept Hank’s assurance that he had missed his girls badly and wanted to do things right this time.

“Believe that when I see it. Tigers don’t change their stripes,” Spike narrowed his eyes at the man who had everything and valued nothing.

Buffy had squealed in delight when her beloved daddy had swooped her into his arms and showered her with praise. All was right with her world again.

Joyce was more reserved, more afraid that once more she would disappoint. Still, she wanted nothing more than the beautiful normal family of her dreams. That dream didn’t have room for divorce and single motherhood. She just wanted what her parents had, happy normal lives.

They hadn’t been home very long before it was clear that the real reason Hank had reunited his family had more to do with the firm’s desire for their people to have healthy, decent family images. His superiors liked Joyce and thought Buffy was adorable. They had suggested rather forcefully that Hank had reached the furthest rung of the ladder possible if he chose to become some swinging single. He still had his eyes on the prize and hope for a partnership in time. If that meant Joyce in an apron at home and in a cocktail dress at company functions then that’s what he’d do. Besides, it was nice to see the adoration in Buffy’s eyes and know that to her, at least, he could do no wrong.

***  
“Mommy’s talking funny again Charlie,” Buffy confided in her friend. “She has that yucky grape juice that I tasted without her knowing and it makes her act weird.”

‘Yeah, pet. In vino veritas … the truth is your mum’s unhappy and defeated.’ Spike agreed sadly. Joyce was drinking more nights than not. She had seemed to have conceded that her husband was not going to change no matter how hard she tried to be the perfect wife. ‘Just can’t give up on that whole dream of a family that only really exists on TV sit-coms or the rare lucky folks like your mum and dad.’ It wasn’t the dream that was at fault it was the man Joyce had chosen. 

The worst part was that, like most kids, Buffy was blaming herself for the tension in the family. “If I could just be daddy’s perfect blonde princess again he’d come home at night and mommy wouldn’t be so cranky,” she’d confessed. “Charlie, I don’t know how to be perfect,” she turned her tear-streaked face towards him and made his heart ache for her. He ghosted his fingers as if to wipe her tears and although she couldn’t feel them she appreciated his attempt.

Over and over she talked to ‘Charlie’ about trying to be the ‘best of little girls’ so daddy would love them again and mommy and daddy would be happy again. Spike had no idea how to help her and wished to Christ that he could knock sense into the mindless twit who was hurting the best two females he knew.  
***  
“Sure, come visit,” Joyce slightly slurred her words. She’d already had finished a bottle of Pinot Noir and was ready to open another. 

Arlene was worried. Everyone back in Illinois knew that Joyce’s dream of Hank turning over a new leaf had been dashed. Bernie, the most peaceful of men, had toyed with the idea of making the trip himself, possibly armed but Jussie had suggested it would be better to let Arlene see how things were going and possibly get Joyce to come home this time to stay.

“Buffy will love having Celia around again. They got nearly as close as we were.” Joyce popped the cork and poured a glass. “School will be out next week and the girls can enjoy summer in LA. You’ll get a break from the farm and Wally too.”

“I wish Wally could come, he works far too hard. Still, he’s happy to see us get away for a bit. Maybe we can all go to the beach,” Arlene hoped to get her little sister off the bottle while she was there at the very least. 

“Celia said that Buffy wrote to her that her third-grade teacher was her favorite of all so far. I think this summer will do them both good. Celia isn’t enjoying school nearly as much as Buffy. You should be so proud of her with all her good grades and honors!”

Joyce was proud of her little girl. She’d become nearly obsessive in achieving. She loved showing her gold star work to her daddy and having him brag about her to his co-workers.

Joyce still heard Buffy talking to her imaginary friend, usually at night and in whispers. Her days were filled with school and friends and so Joyce no longer worried about something she would eventually outgrow. Still having Celia around would only help over the summer.

***   
Arlene had gone back to Illinois leaving Celia to enjoy the rest of the summer with her Aunt and cousin. Joyce had cut back on the wine especially with her sister’s child there with her all-knowing eyes and possible tattling mouth to expose Joyce’s dirty little not-so-secret.

It was unfortunate that Joyce had slipped and had a bit too much on the night when Celia first took ill. By the time Joyce realized her young houseguest was truly sick it was bad enough to need the hospital. 

Arlene and Walter got there on the next flight and though there were no accusations their looks shamed Joyce. Even the assurance from the doctor that it wasn’t likely that anyone would have known Celia’s illness was so serious until it took the turn that had led Joyce to call for the ambulance Joyce blamed herself for not being mindful enough. Further proof of her failings.

Hank kept apologizing for her as if she didn’t blame herself enough for both of them. Of course, HE had no blame even though he lived there too. Oh, no, he had important work and hadn’t been there to notice. He’d expected Joyce had the girls well in hand and hadn’t imagined that she’d blow off a sick child!

Joyce had done no such thing of course but she felt like she had. She was devastated with the prognosis for her precious niece. The child was in intensive care and not responding well at all. 

Buffy was wide-eyed in horror seeing her favorite playmate, a child her own age, hovering at death’s door! “Old people get sick and die, Charlie, not little kids!”

Spike wished that were true.

“Please, Charlie, I know you’re my angel but would you please protect Celia and make her all better?”

“Boatload of manly responsibility you’re puttin’ on a ghostly vampire, Little Bit. Don’t know what I can do. Can’t even get to the hospital unless you’re there.” It tore him up a bit knowing he was destined to disappoint the child who seemed to think he had great powers and could rush in to save the day.

Buffy poured out all her fears and pleas on her Charlie. She showed as much faith as any religious zealot at a revival but there was no miracle healing. Celia died never getting out of intensive care.

Buffy was distraught. “What good is a guardian angel if you can’t help my cousin,” she glared at Spike. “You’re no angel, you’re just a make-believe nothing.”

As if they had been magic words she no longer saw him though he was as present as ever. Spike felt his heart break a bit not just because of this change but her bitter determination to pretend he didn’t exist at all.

“Yeah, you still think I’m a nothing. Guess it starts here.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Many places have carnival just before Lent on the Western Christian calendar (usually Catholic or formerly Catholic countries) https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Carnival The most famous in the USA is likely the one in New Orleans known everywhere as Mardi Gras. Rio, arguably, has taken it to upper extremes in pageantry and color!
> 
> Carnival in Rio 1982 (Samba schools parade portion) https://youtu.be/NCHV0MJBsqk   
> 2017 https://youtu.be/yW313inIlFk And in 2019 https://youtu.be/WqkUu3VMhF0 
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Falklands_War   
> Nice documentary on the war https://youtu.be/V887sYcmIAc 
> 
> Thanks to LCF for suggesting that Spike might have a natural encounter or more with Barry Seal in this time period. I loved giving a short nod to this very logical connection and thanks to LCF for the suggestion!   
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Barry_Seal  
> Cocaine cowboy Seal https://youtu.be/f9nWJQ5FuIE 
> 
> The CIA and cocaine/drug smuggling in their efforts to manipulate the outcome of civil wars in Central America https://youtu.be/GJkNEtgMulw 
> 
> Well before the Iran/Contra hearings revealed even more information about the involvement of the USA in the political situations in Central America, Oliver North was hip deep in dirty dealings there. 
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oliver_North  
> https://theintercept.com/2018/05/12/oliver-north-nra-iran-contra/ 
> 
> 5 things to know about Oliver North https://youtu.be/T2jfLUpeRIQ (advise you turn off volume and just read the captions as the music is annoying as hell!)
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Iran%E2%80%93Contra_affair
> 
> The Iran Contra affair https://youtu.be/ccZkcFEyUyc   
> 30th anniversary of Iran/Contra https://youtu.be/Fij9sRTWEuc   
> Longer documentary https://youtu.be/xUu8f9rBh_g 
> 
> Robin of Sherwood opening clip (1984) https://youtu.be/b9BiXsnYd7k   
> First episode (pt 1) https://youtu.be/qxYpBlrkxDc Other episodes on playlist  
> Clip of Robin meeting Marian for the first time https://youtu.be/QAmG2bfOKiQ (yes I was and am an avid fan of this series. If you haven’t had the pleasure I HIGHLY recommend it. It is a blend of the two main Robin Hood legends and the supernatural involving ancient gods and magic.
> 
> Sayulita, Mexico https://youtu.be/WUI0bNBPOj8 https://youtu.be/lnpY8_0QGr4 
> 
> Puerto Vallarta, Mexico https://youtu.be/jBBksUPqkoE   
> Cruise tourists take on Puerto Vallarta https://youtu.be/8MzML17dV-w (assuming they don’t become some vampire’s midnight buffet that is).
> 
> Warning signs of alcoholism https://www.alcoholrehabguide.org/alcohol/warning-signs/  
> Warning signs of emotional abuse https://psychcentral.com/blog/11-warning-signs-of-emotional-abuse-in-relationships/  
> https://www.crisistextline.org/get-help/emotional-abuse


	46. Chapter 46

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [](https://imgur.com/lgCA53m)

Chapter 46  
[](https://imgur.com/uwG3VQu)

The first stop was Athens. Spike had a yen to finally take in that “grand tour” that so many of his peers had enjoyed after graduating from university. His mother’s illness had precluded his indulging then but even a century later it was worth seeing the sites he’d studied and long yearned to see. Spike looked forward to a modified version of the tour now. 

He was rather glad he had the chance in this day and age since so few made it all the way to Greece back in his day because the Turks still made travel to those ancient sites dangerous for a young British gent. “Guess it was just my good luck again thanks to you, Poodle! Changed my life you did, gave me the world. Things I’d never have experienced all thanks to you and your deadly kiss.”

His studies back in the day had been typical for a man of his background. Classics focused on the Greek and Roman empires, their history, literature, and languages and William had loved every moment of it. To finally see some of those sites gave him a thrill even now. 

And, since the Fates seemed to be smiling on him, the modern era also allowed him to take in more than one really great concert too. Without even leaving Athens he and Dru had discovered the Rodon Club where, even though he’d missed the Ramones, they had managed to catch the Pixies. 

Bigger, grander venues like the Olympic Stadium brought the pleasure of hearing Pink Floyd play live. 

Dru played along and indulged his desires. It would be hard not to. Spike looked like a kid on Christmas morning or a puppy writhing in excitement looking forward to a tug of war with a favorite playmate. 

“Aha!” He’d dug around in his belongings and pulled out an old dog eared book with the longest title Buffy had ever seen. ‘ A Handbook for Travellers in the Ionic Islands, Greece… blah, blah, blah. Wow, do all old books have a whole book in the title? ‘ Buffy giggled at Spike’s massive grin.

“Was my father’s! Bought it in 1840 when it came out when he was plannin’ his own Grand Tour. Never thought I’d get the chance to actually do more than read and wish.”

“Spike, you keep feeding the ‘uman in you. Daddy tried to make you stop but all these years later and you still do,” Dru shook her head but looked at him with indulgence nonetheless. “It’s like you sometimes forget you’re a demon made to bash and slash and bathe in blood.”

“Soddin’ borin’ if that’s all we do, Poodle. Likely why the Poofter’s as dull as a table lamp.”

He swept Dru up in his arms and twirled her around. “Want to see the world with my Princess on my arm. Bit of dancin’,” he kissed her, “Bit of art and decent conversation. Taste some of the food and drink that’s got more flavor than boiled beef and puddin’. Plenty of time to hunt and feed the demon too… don’t pout,” he cajoled her. “Come now… you love it too. Just too stubborn to admit it.”

“Well, sometimes,” she giggled. “Like to see my Knight playful and ‘appy,” she growled and snapped her teeth playfully. “My kind of play later then. Tit-for-tat.”

*** 

Buffy gaped in amazement at places she’d never realized she had really wanted to see but found that she did. Maybe it was Spike’s enthusiasm that made her as excited as he was as they scoped out the Acropolis with the ruins of the grand Parthenon, several amphitheaters and arches. More temples than Buffy could count. Even the featureless plain where the battle of Marathon had taken place had come alive as Spike shared all he’d learned when a lad. Buffy almost expected to see the field filled with Athenians and Persians rising from the ground to re-engage in battle. ‘He’d make a great history professor. Funny how a dead man can make things come alive.’

It was far better than the seven-day antiquities tours on offer even if their visits were all at night and often involved breaking in to access the old places and museums. 

Dru indulged Spike and even pretended interest from time to time but Buffy could see that she really had no interest in a culture long dead and their remains left behind. 

All except Delphi that is. Dru perked up as they neared the ancient caves and Spike talked about the Pythia and how she was in a drug-induced state as she made vague pronouncements about the fates and fortunes of all those large and small.

Dru looked at the notes Spike had been looking over. “I don’t mind washing in the spring and burning laurel leaves but I don’t want to drink ‘oly water even if it’s not the Roman kind.” Dru had decided she might be one of the priestesses because of her visions and wanted to commune with fellow oracles. “My pixies want to play among the stars, Spike, but the eagles swoop and dive closing the circle. They fear the python.”

Spike grinned. “Just Greek mythology, pet, no eagles flyin’ about to hurt your precious Pixies. Promise,” he assured her.

Dru did one of her sway dances and hummed along with a melody only she could really hear. “The King will return when the Sun burns it away but the Knight will fight with the Sun and the Princess will be left with none.” She stopped dancing and looked sadly at Buffy. “I don’t like it ‘ere any longer, my Spike. Let’s fly away quickly.”

From that day she pushed Spike to move on with his grand tour and whined often about her time running out.

*** 

Italy was also filled with wonders and they traveled the boot trying to catch as many as possible. Florence enthralled Spike and Buffy as well. She’d love a return visit when in possession of her body. It was hard to imagine a country with so much art and beauty.

Even the landscape was a work of art. Tuscany with its wine-growing areas and ancient villages painted living pictures to match those in the museums.

Spike laughed as they climbed the Tower at Pisa. “Put up closed signs all you want, Wankers, not here on your time anyway.” The normal tourists had to leave in disappointment but with Spike’s skills in breaking and entering the pair and their invisible companion had nothing preventing them from taking in the old site and view it offered. 

Dru was excited at moving along and forgoing the rest of Spike’s books suggestions. “But the nasty wall is down now and all those countries are just waiting for us to come and play.”

“We could forgo Rome I suppose. Already been there a couple of times and that Plonker The Immortal still has a grudge against me,” Spike considered. “Still would love to ramble around the forum and all the new places being excavated.” He looked at Dru’s pleading eyes and gave in. After all, his Princess had been quite patient with his whims.

“Alright, Dove, after Venice we’ll head north. Can’t leave without seeing that.”

Dru beamed and clapped in victory. “Too many Basilicas and the like in that book of yours. Only time I liked all that was when daddy ‘ad us eatin’ all the ‘oly fathers and sisters. You just want to see art and architecture. Daddy would be displeased.”

Spike bit back on his anger. His lady couldn’t help how she’d been raised after all. “Well, daddy’s not here is he?”

“Not yet.” Dru gave a wistful smile. “Not long now though.” 

Spike threw up his hands in exasperation. No matter how many decades passed his Plum wouldn’t give up on her belief that her beloved daddy would return to her. ‘Ponce ruined her good and proper.’

Dru wrapped her arms around Spike from behind and offered a bit of appeasement. “Don’t mind the pagan temples though. We can see some more of them before we leave.”

Spike smiled and drew her hand up to his lips for a kiss. “Whatever my Princess commands.”

*** 

Spike had broken into a government building and fumbled about with their new technology. The personal computer was still new and the Word Wide Web had just opened the world to the average person, at least the average person with access to the computer equipment needed to access it. ‘Great thing this modern age!’ Spike grinned as he used the machine to look up likely places to take his beloved that weren’t from his father’s old book.

“Looks too much like WWII in the Balkans right now but I know Dru’s going to want to see what the new Czech Republic’s like. Always loved Prague.” He wrote some notes on the page of things to see that would be new.

“Oh, Spike,” Buffy furrowed her brow, “You really need to rethink that!” She remembered the reason Spike originally came to Sunnydale. Things went really bad in Prague. Then again if Dru didn’t have her bad encounter, perhaps they wouldn’t have come to her town. “Not sure I like that at all. Guess we’ll just have to go.” Buffy was surprised at how much the idea of not having Spike in her life troubled her. “Yeah, that’s a stop you’ll have to make.”

***   
[](https://imgur.com/fj7GvwL)

At first he told himself that he just hated being ignored, disliked the silent treatment. “Ungrateful little brat. What’d she expect me to do? Not like I killed the girl!”

He wasn’t about to admit he missed the long conversations and confessions of a kid much less yearned for the unconditional acceptance and affection she’d offered from the first and that he’d grown used to.

Buffy the child was every bit as stubborn and single-minded as the older version. From the day they laid poor Celia to rest she had refused to see or speak to ‘Charlie’. “Not like I don’t remember how it feels puttin’ such a small coffin in the ground. Celia was nearly of an age as Alma and I can still remember how that felt. Woulda changed places with m’sister in a heartbeat. Hated seein’ the pain in mother’s eyes and my father aged at least ten years. I get the hurt and anger, but it’s not my bloody fault.”

Buffy refused to acknowledge that she could still sense him. From time to time it seemed she was well aware that he was nearby. After all, he rarely left her side, hadn’t in all those long years. A quick look in his direction followed by a determined jut of her chin and deliberate turning aside clued him in that she did know, just refused to accept. It hurt him to the quick.

For a long while Spike thought she’d give in but she hadn’t. He was pretty sure she could have seen him just as she used to if she wanted to but that was the problem… she didn’t want to.

As time went on, Spike had to admit that she really couldn’t see him any longer. “Not sure how that worked anyway. Maybe it took the untainted purity of a child to see beyond the normal. Maybe she would have stopped seeing me eventually. Heard tales of wee ones havin’ the sight only to outgrow it,” Spike consoled himself.

She’d done a perfect job of convincing herself that ‘Charlie’ had been nothing more than her imagination to the point where she persuaded herself that she truly had just been playing with an invisible polar bear like her mom insisted. And, just as Joyce had hoped and encouraged, she’d outgrown even that as she had him.

‘Charlie’ went the way of all childhood fancies and was placed in distant memory that fades and mutates in time not to be spoken of or even remembered often, if ever.

‘Feel like one of her fuckin’ broken toys tossed in the rubbish bin.’ Spike was glad his tears were as invisible as he was.

Spike was lonely.

*** 

Buffy was lonely too. Her mom was more and more withdrawn into herself, fighting her own demons of depression and perceived personal failures. She wasn’t quite an alcoholic but was well on her way if she kept it up.

The more Joyce indulged in self-medication the more Hank used her weakness as an excuse for his bad behavior.

Buffy was still doing all she could do to be what she thought her beloved daddy wanted. ‘Reminds me of Dru and just as pointless, poor mite.’

Her grades were excellent and she was already lightening her hair even before middle school.

When Hank had begun taking her to Ice Capades and calling it their special fun-time, she’d learned how to skate. Turned out she loved it and the skill came easily to her but she would have been out there doing axels and spins even if it had killed her just to make Hank proud.

Her ribbons and trophies were a source of pride for him. He called her his own Dorothy Hamill and Buffy got her hair cut to match her new idol and tacked up posters of her and the more contemporary stars of the ice in her room. Eventually Hank lost interest but Buffy didn’t.

When Buffy entered middle-school she tried out for cheerleading and once more fed into Hank’s idea of the ideal daughter. Life revolved around school, the ice rink and cheerleading… and boys, or rather… boy.

The year before Buffy entered middle-school she lost her heart for the first time. He was an “older man”, already in the rarified halls of middle-school and Spike hated him.

“I remember you, you wanker,” Spike sneered at Billy Fordham. “Don’t know what Buffy ever saw in you. Arrogant little prick as a kid and friend-selling bastard later.” Spike was glad he had let Dru be the one to dirty her fangs on that one! “Buffy had tragic taste in males from the beginning,” he lamented.

The boy broke her heart making sure Buffy knew he thought of her as a “baby” and beneath his notice. Spike watched helplessly as she soaked her pillow with the kind of tears only the first rejection can call forth. “This a pattern, Pet? This jerk with his hints of your dad’s attitude then Angelus? Buffy, you’re worth so much more.”

*** 

Spike watched the parade. Chad, Dustin, Corey, Brett, Justin, David, another Corey… Buffy was bewitching without the use of magic. She was of the elite, a cheerleader and head of her class and every adolescent lad with eyes lined up to sniff around his girl! Spike hated the lot of them. 

“Worthless wankers. Likely not even that at this point. Wanker wanna-be’s.” 

Buffy enjoyed the attention but didn’t so much as kiss any of them. Like that Ross bloke on ‘Friends’, they were all firmly thrust into the friend zone.

Then came Tyler. Buffy gushed about the bloke! Spike couldn’t see the appeal. Typical jock from a family with more money than was good for the boy to access. Fancied himself something of a player even as a Freshman. He palled around with Buffy’s first crush, Ford, but unlike his friend didn’t have a problem with Buffy being a year behind in school.

His father had some impressive connections and Hank didn’t seem to mind that his little girl was still only in eighth grade when the boy invited her to her first school dance. Buffy’s best friend Kimberly nearly swooned thinking Buffy was going to her first high school dance before even entering high school.

“What kind of people run these schools? Chit’s just a child! Why hasn’t one of these teachers taken this pervert by the balls and warned him off?”

Joyce silently agreed with Spike but Hank was too pleased that his little princess was moving in the “right” circles to be concerned. “Joyce, Buffy’s a good kid and grown-up for her age. You don’t want to keep her from taking her rightful place as Queen of Hemery High from day one.”

“I don’t want to rush her growing up,” Joyce spat. “She’s not going to throw her life away on some boy and shelve all her dreams and ambitions.”

“Are you saying that’s what you did?”

The fight was one of their worst in a long time and Buffy cringed in her room knowing she was at the core of the trouble. All she had wanted was to feel wanted and instead it made her parents fight, her mom drink and her dad to leave in anger.

Spike wished he could console her. ‘Not her fault. Problem's been there from the get-go. Kids don’t cause their parents problems if they’re happy to start with.’ Buffy sniffled and looked in his direction but he knew she didn’t see, couldn’t feel the concern and caring that he knew his face would show.

*** 

Buffy was Queen of Hemery. There was no way she’d let her dad down that badly! She was dating her Sophomore lug and already got a place on the junior varsity cheer squad even as a Freshman. Her grades were stellar. Her ladies-in-waiting included her oldest friends, Kimberly, Jennifer, and Nicole. They ruled the halls and classrooms from the first day. 

Spike wasn’t too pleased to see his sweet little girl developing quite the ego. She was letting the popularity with her peers and deference from her teachers and coaches go to her head. “Keep this up and you’ll wind up as uppity as Cecily.” 

He knew that underneath it all she was still the sweet-natured girl he’d watched from birth. He knew her kindness and compassion that kept her from being a bully even if she tolerated it from her clique. He’d seen her refuse to stop being friends with her shy friend from grade school. Patty was overweight, pimply and not popular but she and Buffy had played together when young and Buffy wouldn’t let her new friends pick on the girl. Spike was proud of her.

He knew that she was really just a sad little girl who would give anything to be sure of her parents love but putting on a brave face to fool the world. “Already learned denial, haven’t you pet?”

He hated seeing her hurting and feeling so alone even with all the bees buzzing around her. “Infuriatin’ bint! Even as a kid you turn me inside-out.”

Spike watched her carefully. It would be so easy to have her tender heart ripped out and have no one to turn to. ‘Not sure what I could do but I’d have to try.’

*** 

Another new talent Buffy had mastered was shopping. Daddy might not have time for her and Joyce might not pay close attention but the plastic made sure she had the newest fashions and shoes to die for.

“God! My dad would totally like have a literal cow if I spent that much,” Nicole sniped in jealousy. “Won’t yours like ground you till like ever?”

Buffy laughed. “Nah. I’ll just remind dad that Hemery has kids with a lot of money and I didn’t think he wanted me to get made fun of for wearing last seasons stuff. He’ll be cool with it.”

“Shoes!” Jennifer grabbed Buffy by the elbow and pushed her towards the right store. “Have to have shoes to go with that new sundress. Oh my god, the totally cutest sandals are just what that needs”

“Yeah,” Kimberly teased, “Tyler would so dump you if you like didn’t have the right shoes.” She rolled her eyes and laughed.

“Seriously!”

Nicole, who secretly was crushing on Tyler pouted. “ Whatever. He wouldn’t notice. Buffy could just shake her pom-poms and he wouldn’t care if she was wearing a sack.”

Buffy smiled but it was hollow. None of her friends knew that Tyler and Buffy had been fighting over his interest in a fellow Sophomore. “Maybe I’m getting tired of Tyler… he’s so… last year.”

Kimberly nodded sagely. “Lots of other guys out there.”

“For sure,” Jennifer agreed. 

Nicole perked up. “So you’re breaking up?”

Buffy shrugged, “Haven’t decided.”

Buffy’s tuned out the squeals and conversations of her girlfriends as she thought back to the beginning of the end of her first romance. It was her fault of course. For all the outer appearances, she was still pretty immature… too immature for Tyler at least. __

_The boy backed Buffy up against the brick wall and thrust his thick, wet, tongue into her gasping mouth. Buffy knew that adults kissed with tongue but until now she’d never had anyone do this to her. She gagged. It was gross. She wondered what she was supposed to do with the thing now that it was in her mouth instead of in his and she tried to push Tyler away._

_“Hell, Buffy, we’ve been dating for almost a year. Don’t you even know how to kiss? Maybe Ford was right and you’re still a baby.”_

_He’d gone off in a huff and the next Monday at school Buffy had seen him with one of the varsity cheerleaders behind the bleachers. She seemed to know what to do with his tongue. Buffy was humiliated._

While the girls tried on shoes and discussed the merits of different boys in their class Spike looked around the mall in utter boredom. 

“Wait a minute.” He’d spotted the same old bloke at the last three stores. Seemed to be following the girls. ‘Shifty lookin’ bastard.” The man was an indeterminate age but well past his prime. His slouch hat and tweed didn’t fit the So-Cal look in the least. “Scruffy beard and bloody damned gloves too.” The man would bear watching. 

Spike frantically tried to think of how he could protect his girl if the pervert did have his eye on her. “Would have to be Buffy. She’s the jewel in the group. Who’d notice any of the others when she turns on that smile of hers?”

The man slipped into the shadows as Spike watched. Spike feared that once more Charlie was going to fail in his guardian duties.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The grand tour (Victorian era) https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Grand_Tour
> 
> Victorian Grand tour https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6QbDYLhJNYw&feature=youtu.be
> 
> The Grand Tour https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pv9al35xtsA&feature=youtu.be 
> 
> Classics education https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Classical_education_movement
> 
> What we lost when we abandoned a Classical Education https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hPz0yTPY0vo&feature=youtu.be
> 
> What if everyone had a Classical education https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0m5yDZCy2pE&feature=youtu.be 
> 
> “A Handbook for Travellers in the Ionian Islands, Greece, Turkey, Asia Minor, and Constantinople: Being a Guide to the Principal Routes in Those Countries, Including a Description of Malta, with Maxims and Hints for Travellers in the East” is a real book published in 1840, written by John Murray and is still available including online. https://books.google.com/books/about/A_Handbook_for_Travellers_in_the_Ionian.html?id=3A0NAAAAYAAJ
> 
> Oracle at Delphi and drugs https://www.livescience.com/4277-theory-oracle-delphi-high.html
> 
> In Greek mythology, Zeus released two eagles, one to the east and another to the west, and Delphi was the point at which they met after encircling the world. 
> 
> https://www.ancient.eu/delphi/
> 
> History Channel doc. On Oracle at Delphi https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fmaor3Vz2ew&feature=youtu.be
> 
> Battle of Marathon https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vvBoCATqriM&feature=youtu.be 
> 
> Marathon today https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y0dAU9ZNMTw&feature=youtu.be
> 
> The Parthenon https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tWDflkBZC6U&feature=youtu.be 
> 
> Pink Floyd in concert Athens 1989 Live in Olympic Stadium Spiridon Spiros Louis, Athens May 31,1989 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xVCcOB2j3DE&feature=youtu.be 
> 
> Pixies live in Rodon Club - Athens, Greece May 20, 1989 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e8kAb78WTtI&feature=youtu.be
> 
> The Rodon club https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rodon_(Athens)
> 
> Athens https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KEWRNgiLCuI&feature=youtu.be 
> 
> Ancient sites in mainland Greece https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_2oFV2Myq88&feature=youtu.be
> 
> Quick tour of some of the classical sites in Italy https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RGLLf_eGVLk&feature=youtu.be
> 
> Top 10 archaeological sites in Greece https://www.telegraph.co.uk/travel/destinations/europe/greece/captivating-holidays/greece-archaeological-sites/
> 
> Historic sites of Italy https://www.triphistoric.com/explore/articles/historic-sites-in-italy
> 
> Tuscany https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FUT78N6OQuA&feature=youtu.be 
> 
> Pisa and the tower https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3gTq4WggLp0&feature=youtu.be 
> 
> 1990 closure of tower out of fear of collapse https://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/1555945/Leaning-Tower-of-Pisa-is-saved-from-collapse.html
> 
> Florence https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ut-e40u3lS0&feature=youtu.be
> 
> Venicehttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YKUd8QbLp3U&feature=youtu.be
> 
> Attempts to save Venice https://www.theguardian.com/world/2002/jun/10/arts.artsnews
> 
> Fall of USSR/Eastern Europe revolutions from ‘89 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hc2XGHA7NK4&feature=youtu.be 
> 
> Fall of the Berlin Wall https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zmRPP2WXX0U&feature=youtu.be 
> 
> Eastern Europe opens after the cold war ends https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NBzqxiQz9qA&feature=youtu.be
> 
> Though part of our everyday life now, the PC and web are really pretty new. Their use was only coming into real-world use in the 1990s https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/World_Wide_Web
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J8hzJxb0rpc&feature=youtu.be
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Personal_computer
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pRYFBAA-JA0&feature=youtu.be (to make you grateful for the ease of today!... I remember this well and even long before)
> 
> Bosnian war and end of Yugoslavia https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0zjMb75vyrs&feature=youtu.be 
> 
> Dorothy Hamill Tribute Video https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Le9iHkN4z-Q&feature=youtu.be 
> 
> Ice Capades 50th anniversary special https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5JOevsZ8gIY&feature=youtu.be 
> 
> Cheerleading is important stuff in high school https://www.varsity.com/news/want-cheerleader-high-school-cheerleading/
> 
> About the cheerleading subculture http://smhp.psych.ucla.edu/pdfdocs/youth/cheerleading.pdf


	47. Chapter 47

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [](https://imgur.com/3zPtgkr)

Chapter 47

[](https://imgur.com/uwG3VQu)

All the old capitals were both the same yet utterly changed. There were still the small winding streets and ancient buildings although some of the sites in Spike’s book had been destroyed in the Great War. Modern infrastructure stood proudly next to all that history though. 

The areas still fresh from isolation under totalitarian governments were playing fast catch-up with the west.

There was plenty of tourism too since the formation of the European Union and the opening of the Chunnel between the UK and Continental Europe made getting around easier than at any time previous. Not just the wealthy had the means and ability to take in the treasures and pleasures on offer in this day and age.

Vienna had been far more enjoyable than during the last ill-fated visit but the time spent in the old cities made Dru yearn for Prague. For some reason, that particular old city had a special place in her heart and called to her pixies rather loudly. 

“Some’ow they tell me going to Prague will bring daddy ‘ome,” she had confided to a less than excited Spike.

“Last I heard the old bastard was wallowin’ around in alley’s eatin’ rodents. Don’t see him doin’ jig across the Charles Bridge, poodle. Think your Pixies are tellin’ tales. Don’t be too disappointed when he’s not there.”

He had seen Dru get her hopes up often enough to know that the fall out would be sad. ‘Poor mite’ll go into a decline for a bit. Maybe I should hunt the Poofter down and give ‘em a reunion, get it through her head that her daddy’s gone for good.’

*** 

They checked in at the Archibald at the Charles Bridge and settled into their suite. “Think we can pick up a quick bite or two over in New Town, what do you say, Dru?”

“Sounds nice,” she brushed her hair and smiled a wicked smile. Only a city as old as Prague could call an area New that dated back to the late 1300s. “We should see that new building they don’t know what to do with.”

Spike lay across the bed on his stomach while looking at a city map. Things weren’t exactly the same after the rebuilding but close enough. Still, maps had saved their lives more than once!

“Have to give them credit. Turn bombed-out messes into architecturally controversial buildings. Saw pictures of that Dancing building. Might be nice to see it for ourselves, make up our own minds,” Spike agreed. “Hear they’re sellin’ office space but mostly it’s just drawing gawkers and arguments.” Spike rolled off the bed gracefully. “Likely some decent hunting in Charles Square while we’re there.” 

Dru licked her lips. “Could do with a dainty or two.”

“Bit of irony. Park was once a cattle and fish market back in Charles IV day,” he grinned. “So, Ducks, let’s go to the market!”

*** 

Spike and Dru expertly drove the two girls as if they were actual cattle and he and Dru were herding animals. They had already fed from another couple and were ready to top off their hunger before heading back to the hotel. Spike led his meal down one path and Dru locked arms with hers and headed down yet another. ‘Chit’s friendly enough. Think I’ll make it good for her, kinda in thanks for the donation,’ he smiled.

The old woman gasped as she watched the lithe brunette woman with the strange eyes lure a young woman behind a bush only to come out alone with bloodied lips.

“Must go to the Cathedral! The good priests will know what to do. Maybe the woman has been possessed!” She made a sign of the cross over her breasts and rushed to the old church. Aigneis was a pious woman well known to the good Fathers. They’d listen to her tale and believe immediately! She had a good description of the woman too. Hell would not get a toe-hold on her neighborhood, not if she and the church could prevent it. “God is gracious in showing me the enemy so clearly.”

*** 

[](https://imgur.com/fj7GvwL)

“What kind of tosser asks his little girl to be less than she is?” Spike fumed as he paced. He’d heard more than enough over the years to know that he couldn’t wait to get back to real-time so he could hunt down and dismember Hank Summers.

Buffy had started her Freshman year at Hemery High and was already one of the most popular girls in the school. What more could daddy-not-so-dearest want from her? Apparently he wanted less.

“Don’t forget... do not to let them see you’re brainy as well as beautiful, honey. It’s great that you’re smart but the only men that’ll impress is your daddy and I am. No guy worth having wants a girl smarter than he is! The kind of fella good enough for my little princess needs to be the one wearing the trousers even in the brains division. Guy like that’ll get his pick of the girls and if you want to continue to be someone’s princess for life you need to know the hard truth. A real man wants a woman that’s soft and cute and who knows how to take care of him. He doesn’t want one smarter or stronger than he is.” Joyce scowled at him but bit her tongue. “It’s not fair but it’s the way the world’s always been. Smart women just put people off so be smart but don’t show it. THAT’S really using your brain.” 

Hank had kissed her on the forehead and sauntered out of the room as if he’d just bestowed the secrets of the world on his only child.

Joyce took a swig of her Chablis and tamped down her ire. “Don’t listen to him, Buffy. You have a fine mind and great grades. Don’t let anyone take that away from you.”

Buffy looked at the doorway where her dad had been standing and nodded absently. She knew her mom meant well but mom wasn’t a guy. Dad was. Dad knew how the world worked. Besides mom was smart and she sure wasn’t happy!

Joyce chased Hank down as he was picking up his car keys getting ready to head to a last-minute “meeting” probably at the local Holiday Inn with one of his soft and cute snuggle bunnies. 

“Just what do you think you are doing sabotaging your daughter like that?”

“Just tellin’ it like it is, Joyce. Maybe if you were a bit more traditional I wouldn’t have a wandering eye. I want better for Buffy. Don’t want to see her a middle-aged drunk one day.”

Joyce slapped him.”Neither do I but I don’t want her to be less than she can be either.”

Hank glared at her in shock. All their years together and Joyce had never really fought back. Maybe she was going to need to be taken in hand before he lost everything. Perhaps putting some money in a secret account wouldn’t be a bad idea just in case. He turned and left without another word barely missing the flung glass that Joyce threw at his retreating back.

“Wish you’d have stood up to the bastard long before now, Joyce. ‘Fraid he’s already got too much power over Buffy for your words to make a dent.”

*** 

“I just thought that two heads are always better than one and we could ace extra-credit,” Patty bit her lip and tried not to show she was hurt by Buffy turning her down. The teacher had offered what she thought was the perfect project to not only improve their grades but to reconnect with her old friend. 

Buffy had been more distant since high school started. Middle-school had been bad enough but at least Buffy had stood up for her and kept their friendship even if they hadn’t hung out together much. 

Buffy twirled her hair, her newest affectation. “Patty I like you and you’re still my friend even if we, like, don’t have the same interests or friends and all. My grades are totally cool. If I work on extra projects I’ll have to cut into valuable shopping time!” 

Patty sighed and went to look for another partner for the project.

“Like, oh my God, you totally sent her back to her zip-code!” Jennifer giggled. “Seriously! Extra-credit? As if!”

“I know, right?” Buffy nodded and popped a lollipop in her mouth. “I like Patty and all. I mean we totally grew up together. She just …” Buffy remembered her dad’s warnings. “Smart girls don’t get the cream and this kitty’s hungry. Not like I’ll flunk out or anything. It’s just SO not my thing to break my brain when I can coast and get a decent C, you know?”

Tiffany agreed quickly then rushed off to drool over a Junior she had her eye on.

“Oh, totally! I mean, you’re not being a beeoch or anything just living in the real,” Jennifer agreed. “We doing the movie tonight?”

“For sure,” Buffy nodded.

Buffy watched her other friend join Tiff and congratulated herself on dodging the nerd-girl bullet. ‘I can do dumb blonde! Pretty handy too, no one knows there’s more there and they under-estimate you. Also frees up lots of time too, less work-Buffy and more play-Buffy.”

***

“Couldn’t have picked somethin’ mildly amusin’ like Twister where at least we’d see that cow sucked up and swirling could you,” Spike pouted. “Lot’s of carnage in that one. Even that Mission Impossible flick where they ruin a good TV show’d be better than this drivel.” 

The girls had picked the only Romantic Comedy playing at the local cinema. “Bloody waste. Not even really about dogs or cats.” He settled in to tolerate “The Truth About Cats and Dogs” and try to tune out the giggling girls who seemed more interested in assessing the pro’s and con’s of Ben Chaplin’s curls than the supposed plot to the annoyance of the group of boys settled behind them in the theater.

“Will you guys shut up, please?” the one lad with a bit of cool demanded.

“God! Take a chill lozenge,” Nicole rolled her eyes.

“Ignore them,” Buffy advised. Frankly, Spike agreed with the boys.

The endless movie ended but not the evening’s ‘entertainment’ much to Spike’s chagrin. “Next up, the new dimwit who won the Buffy lottery.” He did not like her new boyfriend. He was too old for Buffy in the first place being a Senior to her Freshman. He was also a jerk, the kind Spike knew all too well. ‘Some things never change.’

Jefferey Kramer and his sidekick had pulled up and pulled Buffy into the convertible. ‘No respect for her at all!’ Spike fumed.

Tweedle-dum had the nerve to put his hand on Buffy’s bum and ask to borrow her! The lout had acted as if it were a joke, “ No way. You'd get her dirty.” Buffy shot him a dirty look, “He would, honey. He's an animal.”

As far as Spike was concerned they both were nothing but animals. It chafed him to know that Hank would likely approve of the rotter. The kid was planning a career in the stock market and would likely make it.

*** 

Spike was bored. ‘No wonder the kids learn nothing. Bloody teachers make even good subjects sound boring.’

Buffy and her friends were done for the day. They were going to meet later to continue the plans for the upcoming dance. 

Spike had been right about Hank’s reaction to Buffy’s new boyfriend. He knew the Kramer family and that Jeff was going to be a shoo-in at Yale as a legacy student no matter what his grade-point-average turned out to be as long as he passed his classes. The grade requirement to play on the basketball team ensured he’d manage that. Just the sort of boy to take Buffy off his hands one day. ‘Can’t say Hank Summers doesn’t do his fatherly duties,’ he told himself.

“So I’m like, ‘Dad, do you want me to go to the dance in an outfit I’ve already worn? Why do you hate me?” 

Spike had heard the original conversation and so he tuned Buffy out as she and her friends carried on. From the corner of his eye, he saw a beat-up old and dirty Chevy Impala across the lane and noted the window rolling down. “Peaches? What the fuck is he doing here?”

Angel’s eyes were riveted on the teen-aged girls chattering away about dresses and shoes.

Buffy’s girlfriends went off and she took off her jacket and sat on the stairs waiting for Jefferey to come to drive her home from school. 

Spike wandered over to the car and noticed Angel wasn’t alone. A smarmy looking demon was in the passenger seat.

The demon was talking, “She’s gonna have it tough, that Slayer. She’s just a kid. The world’s full of big, bad things.”

“Yeah and one of ‘em’s sittin’ in the driver’s seat.” Spike furrowed his brow. He vaguely remembered the Poofter saying something about some demon sent from the Powers that led him to Buffy but he’d blown that off at the time.

Angel was watching Buffy suck on her lolly and was practically drooling. “I wanna help her. I want to become someone.”

“You want to become what you were, you Berk, a bleedin’ pedophile preyin’ on the cute young blonde virgins,” Spike glowered.

“Jeez, look at you. She must be prettier than the last Slayer,” the demon muttered.

Spike looked up where he imagined these Powers blokes were hovering. “What the hell were you thinkin’ settin’ Buffy up with the King of Perverts this way? No damned wonder it all went tits up if you thought Angelus was fit to help anyone much less Buffy. Bastard’s nearly salivatin’ already.”

Spike glanced back at Buffy looking so young and innocent and shuddered. ‘Speakin’ of perverts.’ He headed back over where the man who had been following Buffy was now approaching her. 

“Buffy Summers?”

Buffy startled and squinted up at the older man calling her name. He looked like an official something. “Um… yeah?”

“I need to speak with you,” the man said solemnly.

Buffy squirmed and looked around nervously, “You’re not from Bullock’s are you? Cause I totally meant to pay for that lipstick.”

“There isn’t much time. You must come with me. Your destiny awaits.”

Okay, not the police or even the mall police then. “I don’t have a destiny. I’m destiny-free, really.” 

“Yes, you have. You are the Chosen One. You alone can stop them.”

“Stop who?” This guy was clearly a banana short of a bunch.

“The vampires.”

“Oh, for the love of all…” Spike shook his head. “THIS is how the Council of Wankers gather their girls? Wonder they aren’t all in prison accused of trying to diddle kiddies.”

*** 

Spike watched as the stuffed shirt tried to woo Buffy to being their newest, shiniest, weapon to no avail. Then the Berk threw a knife at her head and got her attention!

After that Buffy finally allowed him to take her out to the cemetery to prove that Vampires were real and that she was born to slay them. It didn’t go too badly all things considered even if the poor fledge got the stake in his stomach first. 

After that, it was like watching a training montage in a film as Buffy was brought up to speed. 

She perfected sneaking out to join the Watcher, a bloke named Merrick it seemed. She was missing her first-period class a few times because of oversleeping and had already been grounded for it.

Buffy was smart though and Spike was proud of her. She had seen the car wreck as the vampire attack it was even though her Watcher hadn’t considered it worth a look. The complaining lad from the film was holding his own fighting three vampires but only for so long. 

Buffy took one out as the boy took out another while the third ran away. Buffy offered a hand to help the boy up. “Nice friends you have there.”

“Not my friends. Well one of them might be one now but not those three lugnuts.” He grinned at Buffy. “Hey, you can kick some serious ass, Buffy.”

Buffy looked at him trying to place him. “Oh yeah, you’re the movie guy and later the diner jerk!”

“Pike”

“And that’s still a fish, not a name,” Buffy smiled this time though.

“Fish or not, he’s a step up from that idiot you’ve been seein’,” Spike thought. This boy had stones at least.

*** 

“There's a great deal I have to show you, I'm not even sure where to start There's so little time.” Merrick had been pushing Buffy hard with the training. 

She was close to being cut from the Cheerleading squad because of frequent absences. Her friends were starting to give her the cold shoulder because she’d been too busy for their fun and games and worst of all, Hank was displeased. He was fine with her mostly C’s report card but the thought of being cut from the Cheer squad had him in a snit. 

Buffy was jogged from her litany of woes by Merrick’s nudge. “Do you know what a Vampire-King is?”

Spike snorted. ‘That like Burger King? What kind of stupid bollocks does the Council teach their Slayers anyway?”

Buffy was wide-eyed. “A vampire-King? You mean like Dracula?”

Spike let out an exasperated puff. “That Wanker? More like a puffed-up Hollywood vamp that one is at this point. Was a right heroic figure once upon a time till he got too full of himself.”

“Yes, like him. I’m speaking of Lothos however.” 

Spike cracked up. “Lothos? You have got to be kidding me? That idiot’s after my Buffy?”

“They travel about usually with one or two of their followers to lay the groundwork.”

“Called minions you dolt,” Spike shook his head. “Lothos think’s he’s more important than even old Angelus cause he’s killed a Slayer or two. Killed girls just called and not able to fight off a vampire bat! Claims lot’s of nonsense. Looks like the Council buys his bull too.”

Merrick was continuing, “The vampires find a community and they feed on it, make it their own. You were difficult to trace and I think the process has gone a lot further than anticipated.”

“So I’m supposed to go find and kill this Lobos?”

“Lothos, and you aren’t nearly ready to take him on.”

“Oh, come on!” Spike was incredulous. “Unless he uses tricks, the Slayer’s alcoholic mum could take him out. Only thing this pep talk’ll do is scare Buffy into not bein’ at her best.”

*** 

Hank and Joyce were fighting again as Buffy tried to sneak into the house. Merrick had unnerved her and all she wanted was a hot shower and bed.

Joyce was there in her doorway. “Why didn’t you call?”

“I didn’t know it was so late. Jefferey and I were talking.”

“That boy is irresponsible.” She had hated Buffy following her father’s life-plan and dating the feckless boy was number one on her list of things she wished Buffy wouldn’t do.

Joyce sighed. It was as much her fault as Buffy’s. She should have stood up to Hank, put her foot down with Buffy. She’d been so wrapped up in her own misery that she had allowed things to get further than they should. Buffy was just a Freshman, it wasn’t too late to turn things around. Buffy had a good head on her shoulders and Joyce could talk her into using it, being who she was born to be instead of the ego-boost her father seemed to need.

“Dinner is in twenty minutes. You have time for a quick shower. We’ll talk about being responsible later.”

Buffy headed for the bathroom to wash up and turned on the shower trying to drown out the latest of her parent’s arguments.”

“I told her not to be too smart, not to be stupid! I want her to marry well, do me proud not become a juvenile delinquent,” Hank snarled. “Your drinking is the problem. You set a bad example, Joyce. If she’s out there getting into trouble, getting the Kramer kid into trouble there’ll be hell to pay. His parents are clients for God’s sake!”

“I think you care more about that boy than you do your own daughter Hank Summers! Buffy’s a good girl. It’s you who got her off track. Until this year she was a model student and never gave us any trouble. You’re the one pushing her to be some teen boy's dream of what a girl should be. She’s barely 15, Hank and you’re already planning her wedding reception!”

Buffy almost wished this Lothorio vampire would get her if it would make them stop arguing. ‘They’d bond over my casket.’

*** 

Spike saw the glimmer of that death wish that got Slayers killed. Lothos was a prick and a poser but he could hone into that right quick.

The fight was not going well and to give the old guy credit Merrick was doing more than watching. 

Lothos and his head minion were winning. 

Spike swallowed down his fear. ‘She has to win. Met her in Sunnyhell the next year.’ Watching her fighting for her life did one thing though, it brought clarity. ‘Dru was right. I do love her. Maybe not this one… far too young yet, but the one in the real world. Hate seein’ her hurt. Hate all that’s happenin’ to her.’

“Run, Buffy. Live to fight another day,” Merrick yelled. 

The handy lad, Pike, was there and Buffy climbed aboard his motorcycle to escape as ordered.

As they were preparing to speed away when the Watcher took out his gun and played hero. 

“You think that will stop me?” Lothos snickered.

“I think it will stop you from being able to use me against her,” Merrick said pulling the trigger.

The boy gunned the engine and they sped away from her dead Watcher and the vampire who was still after Buffy.

*** 

In the end, Buffy’s ingenuity won the day as Spike knew it would. Lothos and his gang of inept minions crashed the dance. 

Pike had held the fort inside the gym as Buffy battled the vampires outside. Her ‘friends’ more than happy to see her as the sacrificial lamb. 

It had all gone to hell. First Buffy had been stood up by the Kramer boy who showed up with her supposed friend, Jennifer, on his arm. Her friends all turned on her and vampires destroyed what little was left of Buffy’s world piece by piece.

“Brave little minx though,” Spike cheered her on as she faced up to one after another while calling out insults to the vampires and instructions to the slow-witted humans.

Buffy had run out of weapons but snapped a chair leg rearming herself. One nice thing about classrooms, lots of wood.

“Pleased to meet you! Won't you guess my name,” Lothos’ chief minion Amilyn taunted as he kicked at Buffy. 

“I don’t know? Dirtbag? Dust bunny? Dick?” She lunged with her stake and missed.

“You’re a fool little Slayer, die a fool,” he lunged for her neck only to meet her stake plunging upward and into his heart.

Buffy wiped the dust from her hands, “Guess you’ll be using my ticket.”

Buffy pulled herself up not noticing the main vampire right behind her. “I knew you’d come. You knew it too, didn’t you? All your life, dreaming, waiting to feed me?”

“Feed you? Yeah, I’m thinking stake, the wooden kind,” Buffy quipped but Spike could see she was scared so could Lothos. It occurred to her that her stake had gone to hell along with Amilyn.

Buffy pulled out a small cross and held it in front of Lothos. “This? This is your weapon? Your puny faith?” he laughed at her.

“No,” Buffy pulled out a can of hair spray. “My keen fashion sense.” She sprayed some in his face and lit it with a Bic she had in her purse for Jefferey’s convenience.

Lothos began to burn. 

Some of the partygoers who hadn’t yet evacuated the trashed gym watched in horror, “Hey, his head’s on fire!”

Lothos was running and screaming as the flames consumed him while Buffy hobbled toward the door and the waiting Pike. 

Lothos fell into the draperies where photos had been taken of all the happy couples just an hour earlier. Suddenly the entire gym was in jeopardy of going up in flames along with him.

“That’s my girl,” Spike crowed proudly. “No wonder she was so hard to beat. Already found her feet even without the bloody Council. Better than the best they ever trained and only better now.” Spike couldn’t wait to get back to real-time so he could tell her how truly splendid she was.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Canon sources for what Spike sees came from a blending and bending of the ‘Buffy, the Vampire Slayer’ film written by Joss Whedon, a scene from Becoming, Pt. 1 also written by Joss Whedon and the Comic (The Origin) version of the film using the original plans of the writer, Joss Whedon. The Origin 1,2,3 (Dark Horse comics) were written by Christopher Golden, Daniel Brerefont, and Joss Whedon. Added in were my own touches and bits of dialogue.
> 
> A quick look at the EU https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O37yJBFRrfg&feature=youtu.be
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/European_Union
> 
> The Chunnel (tunnel under the English Channel allowing rail and auto travel to and from the continent) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uRdqoQnQ6Pk&feature=youtu.be
> 
> The Velvet Revolution in Czechoslovakia in 1989 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9qG5fxLmfAk&feature=youtu.be 
> 
> Prague https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BFKzX7u-3yg&feature=youtu.be 
> 
> And a longer documentary https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HU7ZFmg1zus&feature=youtu.be
> 
> Their hotel in Prague https://www.archibaldatthecharlesbridge.cz/en-gb
> 
> https://www.prague-stay.com/lifestyle/review/195-the-dancing-house
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QYI1IKwwYTI&feature=youtu.be
> 
> Nice fast cliff notes type look at world map changes post-Cold War (not just Europe) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fDZznU8ikfg&feature=youtu.be
> 
> The Truth about Cats and Dogs trailer https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eBv5jqjW41c&feature=youtu.be 
> 
> Twister 1996 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OgG2jfBfLzI&feature=youtu.be 
> 
> Mission Impossible 1996 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ohws8y572KE&feature=youtu.be 
> 
> Legacy students in US Ivy League Universities https://www.teenvogue.com/story/getting-into-college-is-a-lot-easier-if-your-parents-went-there
> 
> Buffy the Vampire Slayer (the film) trailer https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pnZkV_aR_9w&feature=youtu.be
> 
> From the series, Buffy gets Chosen https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6lT3AOEe7Fk&feature=youtu.be
> 
> For those interested, here is a link to the unaired pilot for the TV series (note the differences with Willow in particular) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WR3J-v7QXXw&feature=youtu.be


	48. Chapter 48

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [](https://imgur.com/xzP7LtB)  
>  So much is happening in this time period that the intended single chapter became two separate ones. What Buffy sees is in this one and the same time period as viewed by Spike will be in Chapter 49 to post next week.

Chapter 48

 

[](https://imgur.com/uwG3VQu)

 

Prague was lovely by day or by night and the hunting was good. Since the opening of Eastern Europe and the fall of the Soviet Union, tourism was booming. Neither British vampire stuck out and the potential meals were plentiful. Since they were leaving them alive and pretty much happy, no one had raised an alarm. Dru’s thrall had come in handy that way in keeping them under the radar. Most of their involuntary blood donors didn’t even remember the event often chalking up the wooziness to too much sightseeing or rich food and drink.

 

‘Wonder if that thrall thing comes from her human part or if Spike just got cheated with his demon?’ The only other vampires she’d seen with a thrall had been Dracula and Lothos and the one Lothos had was weak enough that even a newly called Chosen One could break it.

 

Buffy had spent most of the century first unlearning all she ‘knew’ about vampires and then observing and learning first hand how the demon world really worked.

 

‘Guess it’s like all people, different ones have different skills. Xan can’t do any better than a C- in school but can build furniture without a manual or training. I can ace my SATs and pretty much slay whatever comes at me but can’t figure out how to drive without taking out every mailbox on the block. That doesn’t even cover Giles and Willow and their big squishy brains. Guess Dru got the extra supernatural package both as a human and as a vampire.

 

Buffy had also noted that demons varied one from another in other ways too. Often that was what led to a longer life where half-breeds like vampires were concerned. It seemed to be that the older vampires had demons that were in sync with the human they had once been. Those out of sync didn’t last long after turning.

 

‘Evil humans or ones without a strong moral compass mixed with the compatible demon turned out like the Master or Kakistos, even looking more demon than human in time.’ Buffy refused to even think too long about what kind of human had produced Angelus. Clearly he was in that mold though.

 

‘It seemed that a decent human paired with a compatible demon gave the world a Spike or Sam or even a Dracula. They looked more human and even acted like it when they chose to. Even Dru would be in that category if Angelus hadn’t driven her mad.’ Buffy reluctantly classified Darla as possibly being in that second group too. ‘They have better control of the demon and seem more neutral morally not out just doing evil for evil’s sake.’

 

“I think that from what I’ve seen basically good humans with accepting demons or a strong will like Spike and Sam keep control of the demon and hold onto the human. They even stay looking human. They’re like humans with souls, they CAN choose evil but don’t have to.”

 

“I wonder if Angel will have cloven feet like Kakistos or a punch bowl mouth like the Master one day?” She shuddered. “Maybe I should warn him that if he wants to stay pretty he needs to do more than rely on the curse to control that demon. That way leads to major ugly!”

 

Dru had her eye on a young German tourist who was taking time exposures of some of the statues in the park. She’d been trailing the girl discreetly for several minutes biding her time.

 

Spike was getting restless. “Pet, it’s not like you to dawdle over a meal,” he looked at her in concern.

 

“Don’t want to ruin ‘er pictures, Spike. I know better than to interrupt an artist at work.”

 

Spike clearly remembered Angelus teaching that lesson to his childe more than once over the years. It usually left Dru practically an invalid for days.

 

“Right then. Think I’ll pop over that way. Spotted a likely entree for myself a while ago.” He’d noticed a somewhat obnoxious lout who’d had a pint or two too many. The annoying twit was begging to be eaten. “Get some nosh and a bit of a buzz in one go,” he grinned. 

 

“Go on then,” Dru smiled indulgently. “‘Ave your fun and I’ll ‘ave mine. Mummy doesn’t want to share anyway.”

 

Buffy started to follow Spike who was well down the path in pursuit of his own victim already when she caught a glimpse of something not right. A group that had the look of an angry mob seemed headed directly towards Dru and her quarry.

 

Buffy drew nearer trying to see if this might be the mob that Spike had said hurt Dru when he first came to Sunnydale with his sick sire a couple of years before in the normal time.

 

Dru’s prey startled at the noise and seemed to realize she was in the dark in a park and vulnerable so she packed her cameras and high-tailed it out.

 

The old woman in the middle of the mob whispered, “There! There she is. Devil’s own bride she is. Saw her with my own eyes sucking the soul out of some poor person just the other day,” she pointed at Dru urgently as the mob surrounded the hissing vampire.

 

“Oh-oh,” Buffy bit her bottom lip and found herself actually wishing she could intervene.

 

The apparent leader also whispered to the group, “Don’t kill it. We’ll take it to the good Father. He’ll know the best way to deal with this monster, make sure it’s kind know not to trouble us here!”

 

*** 

 

“Hey!” Spike raced towards the group overpowering Dru. “Let that woman go!” He was in human guise hoping they would think him a concerned citizen and let Dru have a chance to break free and run. Time enough to tear them limb from limb once his beloved was safely out of harm's way, maybe take them by surprise to find themselves facing another powerful demon.

 

The four most burly men grabbed on to Spike as a fifth clubbed him in the head with a sizeable rock. Buffy heard bone crack.

 

“Should we take him to the priest as well, Janek?”

 

“He had a human face. Perhaps he is no demon but one caught in this one’s wickedness and merely unfortunate.” Janek knelt and checked Spike finding no pulse and noticing the growing pool of blood where his skull had been bashed. “I think you might have killed this man, Viktor,” his eyes were wide in horror at the thought.

 

“Consorting with the devil’s spawn, he earned death,” the old woman insisted and spat on Spike’s still body.

 

“Hey, Bitch! Who died and made you judge and jury,” Buffy fumed. “Bet you’ve done your share of consorting over the years.”

 

“What should we do about this body then?”

 

“Leave it. The policie will assume he was the victim of a robbery. We must get this one to the Cathedral,” one man suggested to their leader.

 

Dru was dragged literally kicking and screaming, her teeth snapping, catching any hand not quick enough to be out of range. “SPIKE!”

 

“She begs for death,” the old one cackled. “You’ll get a spike soon enough demon.”

 

They finally managed to bind Dru in heavy chains inlaid with crosses that caused her skin to sizzle and pop.

 

“You see how the Holy image burns it?” Janek noted. “It is as mother says, this one is of the devil.”

 

Janek had grown up in the rural areas where the old stories were still told. He had an idea of what sort of monster they had captured. “We must get this one taken care of quickly. Where there is one there are soon more and we will be overrun by them.”

 

Viktor kicked Spike. “Should we burn this one to make certain he isn’t already one of them?”

 

Janek considered their options. Subduing one upir was possible but not two. The male looked strong when conscious. He thought perhaps there was merit to Viktor’s idea but if the male wasn’t yet of the undead their assault would be more of a sin. If he was already damned then he would likely run when he awoke knowing the people of Nove Mesto would not stand for their kind there. Word would spread and perhaps no more would come. That was the most important thing, stopping this perversion before it took hold and destroyed them all.

 

“Stake him and throw the body in the river then,” Janek ordered. 

 

Buffy gasped as the wood plunged into Spike’s chest mere centimeters from his heart and heard the plop of his body hitting the water.

 

*** 

Spike sputtered and coughed up water. A vampire couldn’t drown but for a vampire who had never stopped breathing it was painful having water in his lungs. 

 

“Fucking religious zealots!” He shivered and worried about how much time had lapsed as he floated unconscious in the cold waters of the Vltava. He could probably scent Dru, she was certainly fearful enough to be easily traceable. Still, he knew that whatever nasties they had planned could be well underway already.

 

“Failed my Princess. Should’ve been me they took.”

 

Buffy understood that feeling well. It was always easier to endure pain and danger than to see someone you love have to endure it.

 

“Right then, find the girl, save the girl, rip apart the natives.” He scented the air looking for the trail. “Not even killin’ What more could they ask? Gottta eat to live. Don’t see them avoidin’ the livestock when they get hungry and they don’t leave them alive or even kill ‘em easy.”

 

Spike lifted his shirt and fingered the stake still protruding from his chest. It was going to hurt like a bugger but had to be done. He knelt in case the pain took him down and pulled the offending thing out. The roar was as much one of frustration as it was of pain.

 

Buffy watched helplessly as Spike tried to bind his injury as well as possible. No time really to replenish the lost blood but he didn’t want to go into battle further weakened. “Could use a top-off about now,” he muttered as he looked around the deserted area. “Where’s a lost tourist when you need one?”

 

The blood had matted his hair turning his curls a bit pink after having been mixed with the river water but the head wound had stopped bleeding at least.

 

Spike stilled as he caught the scent of his beloved and ambled in the direction the mob had taken her. 

 

***

 

The Cathedral was impressive and as empty of people as the roads leading to it had been. It wasn’t the time of night that led to casual pedestrian activity.

 

Spike pushed through the ornate doors and entered the hushed building. Like most old Cathedrals there was an otherworldly feel about it with the old scents of long burnt incense and candles and icons gazed down in disapproval as the vampire followed the trail that led to a side area to the right of the altar and appeared to end in a solid marble wall.

 

“Didn’t just disappear. Must be an opening somewhere,” Spike fidgeted with anything that looked like it might be a secret lever or some-such. Finally, a small gap appeared in the formerly solid wall and ancient narrow steps were revealed leading down into the darkness.

 

Spike slipped into game face to improve his senses. No need for a torch or other light source that would only give away his presence.

 

‘Would be bloody fascinatin’ if it wasn’t for these wankers hurtin' my girl.’ Spike looked around carefully as he descended. This would likely be the only way to retreat once he saved the day and he took note of every niche, every broken step, and every warped handhold that might either help or impede him in that mission. ‘Must date back to the Crusades,’ he surmised and wondered idly if the current Bishop knew about this underground area.

 

Hushed voices could be heard in the distance and Spike crept as silently as a shadow toward the sound.

 

Buffy’s blood ran cold as a piercing scream of pain was heard. It took all of Spike’s self-control not to rush in at the sound.

 

*** 

Spike flattened himself against the rough wall deep in the shadows and watched. Dru wasn’t dust but there was no clear path to rescue her at the moment. Far too many of the mob had decided to stay and join the party for one wounded vampire to rush in headlong with any chance of success.

 

The old woman had a small vial of oil and a glass of water. She dipped a finger in the oil and rubbed the sign of the cross on Dru’s forehead, chin and both of her cheeks. Dru wailed in pain as the blisters and smoke rose. 

 

The priest was reciting prayers as the old one marked the beast. 

 

“Deliver us from this accursed one. And release this one from the captivity of the devil by the purifying fires.”

 

‘Bugger’s plannin’ an exorcism?’

 

“Please Father, it ‘urts. We’ve not been killing. I know I’ve been a bad girl but I’ve been better with my knight there to guide me. ‘E loves me and I want to please ‘im.” Dru was trying to twist away from the chains that bound her and the old woman’s holy oiled finger.

 

A few of the men from the mob looked uncomfortable at the sounds of pleading and pain. Dru looked lovely and frail and their instinct was to have sympathy.

 

“Be silent,” the old woman sneered. “Demons have no emotions. All trickery.” She turned to her sons, “Remember all that she is saying is but the lies of Satan. She would make you as she is given the chance.”

 

The priest hadn’t stopped the prayers, hadn’t seemed to have even heard what the old woman had said. He seemed to be almost in a spiritual state of euphoria of some kind. 

 

“Metropolitan Dorotheus wouldn’t approve of what Father Stanislav is doing,” Janek whispered to his brother. 

 

Viktor nodded. “Father Stanislav is from our village though. He knows the truth of demons even if the good Bishop thinks such things are superstition. See how the flesh burns from the sign in oil?”

 

The priest seemed to return to the world around him. “Bring me the paste,” he ordered one of the men surrounding Dru. Do not touch it yourself but bring the brush.”

 

The group parted and a jar of some ookie stuff was handed to the priest who began to brush it on the spikes protruding from a wicked-looking kind of chair. 

 

He looked at Dru for the first time as he explained what he was doing as if Dru was in need of the information. “This is a potent blend of two deadly poisons. Well, deadly to those who actually live. It consists of a special form of deadly nightshade and Rosary Peas. It will not kill a beast such as you immediately. No, you must be an example. You must exist long enough to warn others to stay away from my people lest they meet the same fate. For one such as you, it will bring increasing weakness and slow, eventual death. When that final death does come it will be in agony as one such as you deserve. You tell the others to stay away from the people of Prague, we know how to deal with you.”

 

Dru was being dragged over to the horrible chair by her captors. 

 

“This is wrong!” Buffy had killed plenty of vampires and demons in her years as Slayer but never believed torture was right not even as a supposed warning to others.

 

Dru was a mess, this wasn’t even the demon they were manhandling but poor tormented Edith. “I used to tell the beads like a good girl every night with my mum and little sisters. The beads bring salvation not pain! But Miss Edith has been ever so naughty and The Lady will punish ‘er for ‘er wickedness.” She stopped resisting as if in agreement with the punishment planned. The men led her to the chair where she was forced to sit, spikes impaling her flesh as they strapped her in. Her screams were deafening.

 

“She sounds penitent,” one of the men observed. “Can she yet be saved?”

 

The priest shook his head, “A mere devil’s trick seeking to save her even yet.”

 

Spike wiped tears from his face as he watched Dru, so frightened and fragile bleed small pools as it dripped from her torn flesh.

 

A few men turned to leave. They were no longer needed to subdue the demon and didn’t have the stomach for torture that they thought they had.

 

Spike had been frantically trying to figure out how to get through the group and save Dru but no clear path had presented itself until now.

 

He waited until the last of the retreating men was passing his hiding place and quickly snapped his neck silently. He latched on to the neck and drained the man as fast as possible hoping that the borrowed blood would be sufficient enough to give him the healing strength he was going to need. His victim didn’t even have time to scream.

 

*** 

 

The priest was still lecturing Dru. He touched the back of the chair almost lovingly being careful to avoid any touch of the paste that made it lethal to a human immediately and eventually lethal to a vampire.

 

“Ahhh, the Inquisition, my church does not do this thing but then perhaps it would not be needed with you.” The priest was close to Dru but not close enough to tempt fate. He had sense enough to avoid eye contact. No need to court the evil eye from the captive devil.

 

“Inquisition means to inquire, to ask, but we already know the answers do we not, demon?” He continued in a taunting voice as Dru whimpered weakly straining at the restraints holding her to the chair.

 

Blood was beginning to pool more deeply on the rock floor around the ancient device of torture as Dru grew more and more pale and limp. She moaned in agony as the poisons began their work. 

 

“Mommy, I’ll be a good girl,” she gasped. “Please mommy. I won’t see them ever again. I won’t listen when the stars talk. I promise to say my contrition and tell the pixies to go away, just make it stop ‘urting please.” Her voice sounded terribly young and vulnerable and a couple of the men in the room squirmed in discomfort. 

 

The discomfort proved just the distraction Spike needed and he roared into the midst of them ripping off heads until he was face-to-face with the priest and the old lady who had started this whole disaster. 

 

He clambered over the pile of bodies and cornered the old one who was cringing in the corner and begging for her life. Spike loomed over her his face fixed and unmerciful in countenance. “You are a vicious and heartless hag. Why should I listen to your plea when you don’t listen to my sweet lamb?” He broke her neck cleanly but didn’t touch her blood as if she, herself, were poison.

 

The priest was trying to creep out of the chamber while Spike was engaged with the old woman but even his speed couldn’t match the wounded furious vampire. Spike was on him in a heartbeat. “Now, how should I deal with you? Pretentious arsehole that you are it would be good to humiliate you first but need to get my lady out of here and fix her up.”

 

Spike used the same chains that had been used on Dru to keep his captive disabled as he gently freed Dru from the restraints and lifted her from the chair. 

 

“Hang on Poodle. We’ll get you right as rain, you’ll see. He cuddled her close to his chest and cooed down at her. 

 

Dru was staring vacantly into the void and whimpering not aware that she had been rescued at all.

 

“First some blood to help fight the poison, yeah?” He set Dru down next to the gibbering priest and pressed her face to his neck. “Drink Poppet. You need strength to fight this.”

 

The crunch of bones moving was loud in the chamber as Dru instinctively went into game face. “That’s right, drink him mostly dry then finish off with the others that hurt you,” Spike pointed to the pile of still warm corpses that had once been the avenging mob. 

 

Dru gulped greedily and once Spike saw she could feed he chose a body from the pile to give himself the blood he needed.

 

Dru had stopped drinking and the priest still lived although clearly terrified. “Come on, Pet. You have to eat. You have to fight and survive. I promise I’ll find a cure no matter what it takes or how far we have to go but you have to work with me here.”

 

Dru was babbling nonsense but did begin to move towards the pile of bodies preparing to drain the rest of the blood from their bodies.

 

Spike strode towards the priest picking up the vial containing the paste. “Well, can’t let anyone go hungry, can we?” He began to force the lethal substance into the mouth of the horrified priest. “Eat up, Padre, said yourself that it’s quick on a human. Consider this grace from me to you.”

 

Seeing that Dru had finished eating he gathered her in his arms and carried her through the passage to the stairs and set her down. “Wait here a mo’ love,” as he went back to the chamber of horrors. 

 

Spike tossed every wooden implement and device he could find into the pile of bodies then added one of the still flaming torches that had illuminated the room watching to see that the fire had caught nicely then returned to Dru and the climb to the Cathedral above and freedom.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Using bits of the storyline about Dru’s capture and torture from “The Problem with Vampires” written by Drew Goddard and originally printed in Dark Horse Comics Tales of the Vampires, issue 1  
> https://buffy.fandom.com/wiki/The_Problem_with_Vampires
> 
> Cathedral of Ss Cyril and Methodius, New Town (Nove Mesto) Prague https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Saints_Cyril_and_Methodius_Cathedral
> 
> Note: To the best of my knowledge there is no hidden underground area accessed through this lovely Cathedral. Given its long history and the even older history of the site prior to the current Cathedral I’ve used literary license to “create” this secret subterranean chamber making it an artifact of the Knights of the Cross (a religious military order from the 1100s and the Crusades) who had a monastery on the site back then.
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Iron_chair   
> Plenty of images of this and other devices online for any with the interest and the stomach for it. Humans (yup, the non-demon/souled variety) are amazingly inventive when it comes to ways to inflict pain and torture on others. This article merely lists some of them. Keep in mind that they all actually were used on other humans BY humans. That means someone thought these things up and decided, “Yup, that’s something I can do and still sleep nights.” https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_methods_of_torture
> 
> The inquisition http://churchandstate.org.uk/2016/04/the-horrors-of-the-church-and-its-holy-inquisition/  
> Interestingly enough there is still actually an official Office of the Inquisition in the Roman church although they no longer hunt heretics and torture them. Still plenty of denouncing though. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Congregation_for_the_Doctrine_of_the_Faith
> 
> Vampires in folklore and fiction strengths and weaknesses etc. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_vampire_traits_in_folklore_and_fiction 
> 
> https://mysticinvestigations.com/vampire-blood-ingestion-effects.htm (not Buffyverse, mystic site)
> 
> Various forms of Nightshade is poison to humans and other mammals (some such as Bell Peppers, tomatoes and eggplant clearly are not) https://www.medicalnewstoday.com/articles/321745.php  
> Deadly nightshades http://poisonousnature.biodiversityexhibition.com/en/card/deadly-nightshade   
> https://www.mnn.com/your-home/organic-farming-gardening/photos/13-plants-that-could-kill-you/deadly-nightshade (also the second plant, Rosary Pea is shown and explained)  
> From the Underworld wiki and their take on nightshade and vampires https://underworld.fandom.com/wiki/Nightshade


	49. Chapter 49

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [](https://imgur.com/N1SVvoy)
> 
> Mental and emotional disorders are not as infrequent as most would think nor should they be a source of shame. There is a vast variety of them, some treatable, some not. I do not claim expertise in the field by any means and the only real claims to an understanding I might have are from any personal experience and that of family members as well as a course in abnormal psychology many years ago. All the rest is just from research. Anyone with issues should never hesitate to get help for their own sake and those surrounding you. No one lives in a vacuum.
> 
> I found many of Buffy's character traits fit nicely with children of narcissists thus my portrayal of Hank in this story. What we did see of him also indicates that possibility as well.
> 
> Dedicating this to everyone who has shown such love for this story and support for me and my family, human and furry. You are all my "happy place" and often my sanity.

Chapter 49

 

[](https://imgur.com/fj7GvwL)

“I’m telling you, Joyce, You’ve raised a juvenile delinquent.” Hank ranted as he stared at the enormous bill for damages to the gym at Hemery enclosed with the notice that Buffy would NOT be permitted to attend the next school year. “It’s your lax discipline and inattention I blame. Her bad behavior is a cry for attention.”

 

“And who is it that’s never around?” Joyce pointed out.

 

“Neither of you, not like she deserves,” Spike concluded in disgust. Buffy was quite able to hear every word of this latest argument. She had enough on her young shoulders without having no support system whatsoever. Instead her parents just piled on more guilt and responsibility.

 

Hank waved the letter and invoice under Joyce’s nose. “This speaks plenty! State law says she has to go to school but the ones our taxes pay for won’t have the little arsonist. Now I’ll not only have to pay to rebuild that gym but fork over hard-earned cash for a private school IF they’ll take her.”

 

“Mom… dad… please stop fighting. I had to set that guy on fire, he was a master vampire and everyone would have been killed. His flaming body is why the gym caught. We just have to explain it to the authorities.”

 

Joyce crumpled into a chair like a marionette whose strings had been cut. Hank’s mouth gaped open. They both simply stared at Buffy in shock. 

 

“What the hell did you just say?”

 

“What she’s been tryin’ to say for a week now you narcissistic fuck,’ Spike growled.

 

“Look. When Merrick first told me I’m the Slayer and that vampires were real I wigged too. It took him taking me to the cemetery and having to stake a few for me to get it.”

 

“This,” Hank waved his hand dramatically, “Merrick person… just who and where is he?”

 

“He’s dead. He killed himself so Lothos couldn’t use him against me. He’s from some kind of Council or something. They find and train Slayers.”

 

“And he ‘found’ you when? And How?’ Joyce gasped. Some madman had clearly gotten his hooks in her baby girl and led her down a scary path to madness. ‘Maybe Hank is right and I’ve not paid enough attention. I just thought she was rebelling a bit and it was a phase that she’d get past and go back to being our smart, sweet, girl.’

 

“I don’t know how he found me. He just came up and explained everything while I was waiting for Jefferey to take me home after school. He said something about this group he works for having some kind of seeing person or something. To tell you the truth, I don’t really remember. I kinda blew him off at first.”

 

“Well of course you did! VAMPIRES?” Hank exploded. “That’s a new one for a come-on to a kid. Guess all those movies and that Anne Rice crap is a better lure for a girl in high school than a missing pet.”

 

“Buffy, what did you mean he took you to cemeteries?” Joyce looked horrified at the thought. “Why in the world would you go with a perfect stranger with a crazy story to an isolated place like that? I know we taught you better than that.”

 

Buffy was crying. “But mom, I really am mega-strong! I mean all at once I’m like Supergirl or something. He said it was because I got Chosen and he’d show me.”

 

“I hope he IS dead for his sake,” Hank blustered. “I’ve got some friends on the force. I’ll check on suicides and we can see what they might have on this sicko. Maybe we can threaten to sue Hemery for letting a wacked out pedophile on campus luring our girl into his insanity. Maybe there were drugs… were there drugs, Buffy?”

 

“NO! No drugs and he wasn’t like that. He taught me to fight.”

 

“Yeah, yeah,” Hank was not listening as his litigious wheels spun things around to his favor. “That might work. You said you got extra strength. Could be a variety of drugs. This could work. Their lax security led to you getting drugged and used. Can’t very well lay the blame for the fire on us then.”

 

Hank was pacing in his eagerness to relieve himself of one large financial burden. He stopped abruptly in front of Buffy. “You just stick to that story, kiddo, and we’ll be home free.”

 

“But dad, there are vampires and now that I’m the Slayer I’m going to have to keep fighting them.”

 

“There are no vampires! Wait! Maybe he had an accomplice. Places like Hot Topic sell those fangs.”

 

“They didn’t look like that, dad. Their faces were all weird and ugly and the fangs weren’t all cool with two pointy ones either. And they went poof when I staked them. It wasn’t fake.”

 

“OH, God,” Joyce moaned. “My poor baby.”

 

“Shit,” Hank huffed. “Well, I doubt we can use drugs as an excuse.” He looked at Buffy with cold calculation. 

 

“Buffy, honey, that’s just crazy,” Joyce began.

 

Hank grinned. “Yeah. Can’t be held responsible if you’re mentally unstable. If we can’t get them to write it off then we should get a break on the bill at least.”

 

“Would you stop worrying about the god damned bill, Hank! Our baby is suffering. She really believes this nonsense, can’t you see that?”

 

“We’ll have to have her evaluated, of course,” Hank continued as if Joyce hadn’t spoken. “Does mental illness run in your family Joyce?” He actually looked hopeful. “Maybe a crazy aunt who hears voices or the like?”

 

Joyce groaned, “Of course not!” She reached out a hand to Buffy, “My poor baby. Didn’t your old invisible friend… what was it… Cherry? Didn’t you say it had fangs too? Maybe you just got confused.”

 

Buffy looked at her parents in confusion and sadness. They weren’t listening and certainly weren’t believing. “If you’d just come with me to the cemetery you’d see they’re real.” Buffy had slipped out for patrols after her parents were asleep every night.

 

“You’ve been sneaking out in the middle of the night?” Hank exploded. 

 

“It’s my job, daddy.”

 

“Your job is to be a credit to your parents then marry some appropriate boy and form a family that shows how well you were raised.”

 

“It isn’t about YOU, Hank, or even about us. It’s about our little girl and her delusions. Something is wrong if she believes in these monster tales.” Joyce was fuming. “We agree on almost nothing anymore but I do agree that Buffy needs to be seen by someone qualified so we can help her sort this out.”

 

*** 

 

Buffy was in session with the psychiatrist that Hank and Joyce had found. She’d been having twice a week meeting for a few weeks and was still standing firm that she was The Chosen One to protect the world from vampires and demons. Joyce was in despair and Hank had begun to see it as hopeful. A treatable mental condition was workable after all. Better than a budding criminal or drug addict.

 

Spike was disgusted. The whole world was blind to things right under their noses. Seemed to him that they would at least let their daughter, who had never been a liar, try to prove what she was saying!

 

“I’m evil. Got a demon and no soul. This piece of work,” he glared at Hank, “That’s everyday evil. The kind no one gets upset about, the kind all around everywhere in society. Seen plenty of ‘em. Some even manage to become as important as they think they are.

 

“Bastard married Joyce not because he appreciated the kind, decent, attractive and intelligent woman she is but because she fit the image he wanted. Literal farmer's daughter, salt of the earth middle-American girl, wholesome and pure. It was a reflection of himself, or what he wanted to be reflected. No real love for her or anyone else. He wanted a perfect wife but couldn’t keep it in his pants so he turned a lovely lady into a wounded bird who found a way to ease the hurt then he hated and shamed her for it.

 

“Pecker wanted a son, also as a reflection of him, not for the joy of having a child. He would have expected a boy to be one of those pansy-rugby players that like to call themselves football players. Send him off to college where he’d join the right Fraternity and become another asshole just like him. Instead, he got a beautiful, sweet, smart daughter and tried to make her into his image of a perfect woman. Marry her off after a year of college give or take, make sure the lad’s the substitute for the mirror boy he really wanted. 

 

“Don’t need to be a bloody psychiatrist to figure Summers out. Read about narcissists and shows what a quack this head-shrink is that he can’t see it lookin’ at Buffy’s dad. 

 

“That whole sense of self-importance and entitlement. His need for constant admiration. Thinkin’ he’s superior even though he’s done nothin’ to earn praise. Always goin’ on about his talent and his achievements. Says Buffy’s delusional but he’s the one who fancies himself so successful and brilliant. 

 

“Doesn’t give a fuck about anyone else's needs or feelin’s. Always ragin’ at anyone around him just to make himself feel superior… always their fault, never his. Always wantin’ everyone fawin’ on him… Oh, yeah, Waker is textbook.”

 

While Spike glowered, paced and ranted the session was coming to a close and the doctor sent Buffy into the waiting room.

 

“Of course further evaluation will be in order not to mention treatment. Clearly we’re dealing with psychosis but it could be more than one obvious diagnosis. She is at an age that we can’t rule out any of them immediately. Clearly it’s a delusional disorder or some sort but it could be something more along the lines of schizophrenia.” He cleared his throat and looked at the weeping mother with sympathy. “Having close monitoring and further testing will be easier in the hospital. We can control her with medications more easily there too.”

 

Joyce gasped in breaths and looked about to pass out. 

“We’ll go with first-line treatments and once we’ve come to a firm diagnosis can choose the best course of treatment. She might be able to be treated as an out-patient with the proper medications but first, we will need close continual monitoring and testing.”

 

“Will my insurance cover all this?” Once more Hank saw only the cost to him. “Also, I’d like to keep this as private as possible… you know, don’t want to ruin her chances for the future.”

 

“Lying sack of shit. Don’t give a damn about Buffy,” Joyce exploded. “You’re just worried about your reputation. Don’t want people talking about your insane daughter or alcoholic wife, right?”

 

The doctor looked startled. All through his dealing with this family, the mother had remained mostly silent. ‘No one mentioned alcoholism. Must make a notation.’ He cleared his throat and tried to regain the floor. “I’m certain your insurance will cover most of the costs, Mr. Summers. All we need to do is determine which facility will best suit Buffy’s needs.” He went behind his desk and began to type on his computer keyboard. “Have a seat while I make the arrangements.”

 

*** 

 

The asylum wasn’t quite the horror show of St Mary Bethlehem in his day. That hospital’s insane wards had given the world the name bedlam. This one was a good deal quieter largely because so many of the inpatients were doped up and only fit for sitting with a glazed look on their faces and occasionally drooling. Spike looked around and shook his head. He knew there were better places where people weren’t just warehoused and drugged. Evidently the doctor hadn’t been overly concerned with Buffy’s comfort and happiness when making his choice. It had all been down to what providers the insurance company used and which of those her psychiatrist had privileges. What was best for the patient barely was considered.

 

Speaking of her happiness… there was none to be found. No one listened to her here any more than they had at home. All of her demonstrations of strength were chalked up to possible side effects of the drugs or her overall condition. The old myths about increased strength in the mentally ill still prevailed in some quarters. It was preferable to believing in a supernatural calling to protect the world from demons and the like.

 

“Poor lamb! If she wasn’t havin’ problems before she will have after stayin’ here any length of time.” Spike yearned to grab the pills they were feeding her and shove them someplace unpleasant.

 

“Gonna have words with Joyce when whatever spell this is ends. Thought better of her than this. Should’ve listened to her daughter and put her foot down instead of putting her in this hole.”

 

Buffy was kept pretty heavily medicated most of the time and actually had lost touch with reality because of it. They cut back on the pills on visiting day after Joyce went on a tirade after seeing her little girl listless and barely functioning.

 

“Put her in here because THEY don’t know what’s real. Real enough to bite ‘em and I’d be delighted to give ‘em a dose of reality soon as I can,” Spike railed. He wasn’t remembering his chipped state that made it as idol a threat just as much as his current noncorporeal state did.

 

It was like watching a beautiful butterfly pinned to a board yet still living as it slowly gave in to its fate. All her fire was dimmed to nothing and all her joy and humor were snuffed with it.

 

“No damned wonder Joyce was in the dark about the Slayin’ back when Angelus was runnin’ around creatin’ havoc. Likely expected to be put back in hospital. Explains her pullin’ a runner after too.”

 

Spike fumed as he watched the visits from her parents. Hank and Joyce weren’t even trying to be civil any longer. Each blamed the other for Buffy and her “problems”. Buffy was drugged but still heard every word.

 

He watched as Buffy cried silent tears when they would leave. He knew her well enough to know that she was blaming herself for the marriage coming apart. Kids usually did, but she had been fairly sheltered from all of Hanks other flaws so she assumed the full responsibility.

 

“She does that about everythin’,” Spike realized. “Takes the whole world on her shoulders. Blames herself for every person she doesn’t save, every evil she doesn’t stop. Hell, she blames herself for releasin’ Angelus on the world. Didn’t even occur to her that he was a couple hundred years old and should have been adult enough to keep it in his pants. Wanker’s like Hank that way! Had a hundred years livin’ with that curse. Didn’t register with Buffy that he never bothered to check into it either. Just naturally blames herself for lettin’ the monster out and all the evil the monster did once she couldn’t bring herself to kill him right away!”

 

Joyce had just left. Hank hadn’t even bothered to come this time. “I’ll be a good girl! I promise. Just stop fighting. Let me come home and I swear I’ll be your angel again,” Buffy muttered. “They’ll never let me out as long as I tell them the truth. Have to lie.” She gave a bitter laugh. “Lying is bad but I’ll have to be bad so I can go home and be good again.” 

 

“Take your pills, Buffy. No spitting them out this time,” the nurse ordered. “Be a good idea to not talk to yourself either if you don’t want the doctor to up your dosage.”

 

***

“So you no longer believe in vampires Buffy?” The doctor wasn’t even looking at her as he made copious notes for her file. 

 

“Of course not, Doctor. They are only fictional characters in books and movies. I don’t know why I ever said that stuff about killing vampires. Maybe it’s like you suggested and it was about my boyfriend cheating on me and turning it into some whole thing about men being monsters,” Buffy lied pretty well all things considered. “Thanks to your help and the medicine I’m all clear now.” Her smile was patently false and far too bright if anyone had been paying attention. 

 

“And the fire?”

 

“I was smoking behind the bleachers at the dance because I was upset with Jefferey for breaking up with me with a message on the answering machine then catching him in the back seat of his car with Jennifer. I was coughing like a lot cause, you know, not really a smoker. It must have caught some of the decorations on fire.”

 

The doctor nodded and smiled slightly in satisfaction. Females were often a bit hysterical when it came to their boyfriends in his experience, especially a young girl barely in her teens. “Since it wasn’t deliberate arson I’m striking the fire starting from the symptoms. This makes your prognosis much brighter, Buffy. Arson would be a sign of far more serious problems.

 

“Yes, I think we might look at outpatient treatment. I’m going to prescribe a low dosage of Haldol but if the delusions should return we can increase the dosage. I’ll discuss the side-effects and so on with your family when they come later today. This should cause a decrease in the dopamine in your brain and help you to continue to live in reality.”

 

Hank was less than pleased to hear that his perfect excuse for the fire had gone up in as much smoke as the Hemery Gym had done. Joyce was delighted that Buffy was coming home. Spike was wishing he had a body so he could indulge in a lovely murderous spree. “Gonna keep druggin’ my girl. I don’t think so!”

 

*** 

 

Spike didn’t have to worry. Buffy was very good at pretending to take her medication. For obvious reasons, she suffered no side-effects however the two houseplants that were the burial grounds for the pills didn’t fare very well.

 

Hank was barely home anymore but Joyce had stopped drinking.

 

Buffy continued to carry the weight of the world on her shoulders blaming herself for Hank’s disappearance from the house by day and killing the monsters by night. The little girl who had always been so honest had become adept at lying and sneaking out late at night and all because no one listened or believed or bothered to explain that sometimes parents are just crappy people.

 

Buffy had also become a skilled eavesdropper.

 

“I know it’s not like LA but with Hank moving in with that girl barely past eighteen I’m not sure I want to be in the same city with him, or the same planet!”

 

Buffy stiffened. “Daddy’s got a girlfriend?” 

 

Spike could see that instead of condemning her wastrel father she was going to find a way to turn even that into her fault. He wished with all his heart that he could talk to her and try to let her know all that he’d seen over the years, wash away at least that part of her hurt.

 

“I’m still looking for somewhere with decent schools that will take Buffy next year. I really don’t want her entire future ruined by this awful experience and her breakdown.” Joyce was on the phone with a friend from college. They had once had dreams of taking the art world by storm, maybe working for Christie's one day where they could take bids on some of the finest art on auction, see some of the beautiful things they could never afford to be near otherwise. Her friend had never liked Hank and hadn’t been surprised when Joyce had reconnected with her as the marriage was falling into rubble.

 

“Where is that?... Well, that’s only a couple of hours from the city so that’s not too much of a culture shock. … You say the schools are good there?”

 

Buffy rushed to her room as Joyce began to pace, phone in hand, nearly catching her listening.

 

That night at dinner Joyce broached the topic with Buffy. 

 

“Honey. I know you know that things have been … unpleasant… between your father and I for a long time now. We’re actually filing for divorce, sweetie.”

 

Buffy wanted to bolt. She wished she could put her fingers in her ears and makes noises to keep the horrible words from reaching her brain. ‘No more daddy? He’s going to replace me with some young girl he’s living with? He won’t even let me try to be his princess again?’ She missed part of the conversation while lost in her misery.

 

“... so I’ll be managing the gallery in a lovely town called Sunnydale. Barb and I will be co-owners and she’ll handle the LA portion. I’ve already spoken to the Principal at the high school there and explained your situation and he’s willing to let you start with a clean slate. He knows you’ve been cleared by the doctor and that he’s even considering taking you off the medications since you’ve been doing so well.”

 

“So,” Buffy bit her lip. “Just like that. Daddy’s gone. You’re getting a divorce. We’re moving to some weird little town where we don’t know anybody but it’s all okay because I’m cured now?” She got up from the table and took her still full plate to the kitchen. “Sorry, mom. Not hungry now.” She blinked back the tears. ‘Probably never be hungry again.’

 

‘No family. No friends. No one who believes me about Merrick and monsters. Can’t even protect LA by patrolling if I’m miles away.’

 

She sat in her room as silent as she once was with the drugs in the hospital and let the tears fall.

 

Spike watched in misery wishing he could just pick her up and carry her off to a place where she could shine again. Where she’d feel safe and loved and whole once again. 

 

“Still a selfish enough sod that I’m glad she’s headed to Sunnyhell though. Might never have met her if she’d stayed in LA.” He shuddered at the thought of what that might have meant in his life. “I get back into the real world, maybe I can help make her world better somehow if she’ll let me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Narcissism, some symptoms: preoccupied with power, prestige, vanity, and may think you deserve special treatment and fame, inflated sense of self-importance, a lack of empathy for others, and a great need for admiration. The hallmark definition of narcissistic personality disorder is grandiosity https://www.psycom.net/personality-disorders/narcissistic/ 
> 
> https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/narcissistic-personality-disorder/symptoms-causes/syc-20366662
> 
> https://www.helpguide.org/articles/mental-disorders/narcissistic-personality-disorder.htm
> 
> https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/evolution-the-self/201311/6-signs-narcissism-you-may-not-know-about 
> 
> Psychosis involves a disruption to a person’s thoughts and perceptions that make it difficult for them to distinguish between what is real and what isn’t. However, it's important to know upfront that psychosis is a symptom rather than a diagnosis. https://www.verywellmind.com/how-to-spot-signs-of-psychosis-in-teens-4125140
> 
> Teens with schizophrenia exhibit behavioral changes which may be intense. They may have hallucinations or delusions. Symptoms often affect their education and their relationships. Usually, the onset doesn't show until the early to late 20s. 
> 
> Delusional disorder is one of the less common psychotic disorders, in which patients have delusions but not the other classical symptoms of schizophrenia (thought disorder, hallucinations, mood disturbance or flat affect). Unlike most other psychotic disorders, the person with the delusional disorder typically does not appear obviously odd, strange or peculiar during periods of active illness. Yet, the person might make unusual choices in day-to-day life because of delusional beliefs. The delusion will not always include bizarre content. There are several subtypes of Delusional Disorder requiring various treatments and/or medications.
> 
> https://www.mindyra.com/solutions/child/delusional-disorder
> 
> Children of narcissists have problems too 
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Narcissistic_parent 
> 
> Being raised by a narcissist gives rise to a belief throughout their lives that they are just not “good enough” despite everything they try and bending over backward to please others. Adult children of narcissists experience love that’s conditional only
> 
> https://www.forbes.com/sites/kathycaprino/2016/07/09/how-being-raised-by-a-narcissist-damages-your-life-and-self-esteem/#7e3fccf22c67
> 
> 6 yeas to know you were raised by a Narcissist https://tinyurl.com/yy57quo8  
> https://blogs.psychcentral.com/recovering-narcissist/2019/05/5-common-struggles-children-of-narcissists-face-in-adulthood/
> 
> https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/romance-redux/201609/8-common-long-lasting-effects-narcissistic-parenting
> 
> https://www.scarymommy.com/narcissistic-parents-incapable-loving-children/
> 
> Having a parent who spends too much time self-medicating or who is a full-blown alcoholic leaves a mark too 
> 
> https://www.verywellmind.com/common-traits-of-adult-children-of-alcoholics-66557
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bethlem_Royal_Hospital often referred to as Bedlam and the source of the word for loud, confusing locations or situations.


	50. Chapter 50

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [](https://imgur.com/5qWXd4A)
> 
>  
> 
> I was going to try to have all of Season 1 covered in this chapter but it really got away from me. So this chapter goes through “The Pack”. Next week’s chapter (that will be on time) will go from “Angel” through “Prophecy Girl”. We’ll also get a slight glimpse of what Spike and Dru are up to at this time in the next chapter. Please forgive typos and the like... I'm half asleep but already nearly a week late on this.

Chapter 50

 

[](https://imgur.com/fj7GvwL)

 

‘Damned sign actually looks welcoming in the sunshine. Who knew?’ Spike felt something was left unfinished as Joyce drove the Jeep past the sign and crossed into the city limits of Sunnydale for the first time.

 

“See, Buffy, almost home.” She pointed to the smallish town coming into view. It was nestled between the gleaming water of the ocean beyond pine-studded cliffs and the seemingly endless expanse of the desert the further inland you looked. “Still beaches for fun in the sun and not crowded like those in L.A.”

 

“Not quite the backwater you feared, is it?” Joyce glanced at her glum daughter. “You’ll make friends before you know it once you start school. You’re only starting a week late after all.”

 

Buffy looked around and mentally said goodbye to life as she’d known it. Sunnydale might have a certain charm but it was a one-high-school town, a one-mall-Smallville, no doubt there was even one village idiot and with her luck, he’d be the first one she’d meet. “Please tell me they at least have one Starbucks!”

 

“I don’t think so, baby, but I had a tasty Latte at a place near the Gallery called ‘The Espresso Pump’ so you won’t be caffeine-deprived.” Joyce smiled. “Really Buffy, you have to give it a chance. This is a new beginning for both of us, a chance to have a fresh start. I’m told the school is a good one with a high number of graduates going on to college. There’s even a local U.C. right here! U.C.S.D. may not be Berkeley or U.C.L.A. but it has a decent reputation too especially the liberal arts program.”

 

Buffy sighed, “I’ll give it a chance and try not to whine. I promise.” She knew this was hard on her mom too.

 

‘Yeah, start fresh. New kid in town with all those curious and judging eyes.’ Buffy had never been in that position before. Everyone she’d known had been in her life forever. ‘Yeah, so no one wants anything to do with me anymore after getting kicked out and turning into the local freak show then the whole mental hospital thing.’ Joyce had tried to make people believe that Buffy was away with family on a great vacation but Hank’s insistence on trying to cut a deal over the money owed to the school system to pay for the fire had let the word spread far and wide that Buffy was locked up. 

 

Jennifer had even given her a fake shrunken head keychain as a going-away gift as if it were a great laugh that she had been hospitalized!

 

Everything had changed anyway, but at least she’d known the local pecking order back in L.A. Everything was an unknown here. It scared her.

 

*** 

Buffy looked around at the new high school crawling with arriving teens. ‘You can do this. Put on that happy-Buffy smile and just jump in.’

 

She was nearly knocked over by a lunatic with the absolute worst fashion sense in the world careening about on a skateboard. The guy wasn’t bad looking if he didn’t look so much like a typical skater-loser in his amazingly ugly and ill-fitting shirt and his hair hanging into his eyes. ‘Nice eyes though, kind.’

 

It hadn’t taken too long to discover that even in a smaller school the names were the only real difference. There were still the same cliques. The jocks and cheerleaders who ruled with their hangers-on around them were the top of the food chain. Poor nice kids like the little red-head Buffy met were on the other end and made to know it. It seemed the local queen bee was literally Queen C. Cordelia was just the sort of girl that Buffy had cultivated as a friend back at Hemery. She’d learned her lesson there though. Cordy might be nice enough to share a book and offer to show her the ropes but she was also cruel to those not in her circle. Buffy had more than enough cruelty in the last year to make that a turn-off.

 

Her trip to the library to get her textbooks showed her that the pyramid of social order wasn’t the only thing the same. It seemed that even a backwater town like Sunnydale had its share of vampires too.

 

The nice-looking older man proudly offered the ancient book with “Vampyre” emblazoned on its cover and evidently expected her to jump for joy having a new Watcher to hide from her mom. 

 

Buffy was pretty sure that her rebuff wasn’t going to stop him from continuing to push her duties on her. “He can try, but I don’t have to buy.” She grinned at her bit of rhyme.

 

Before her first day had ended she’d made a handful of friends, at least one possible rival and frustrated the representative of the Council That Destroyed Her Life.

 

It also brought a dead body in the locker room and the sick feeling inside that no matter how hard she might try to just be the girl she wanted to be and her mom insisted she be, there was no escaping the crap hand fate had dealt her.

 

*** 

 

“Don’t think this one will rise again,” Buffy reluctantly reported to the librarian. ‘What was his name again? Guy? Guyles? Whatever.’

 

Spike looked around the library as Buffy gave the details to her Watcher. Her ‘retirement’ hadn’t lasted a day. 

 

“There’s Harris,” he spotted Xander in the racks eavesdropping and getting an earful about the supernatural. Spike could tell that the kid had no clue about any of it before this eventful day. ‘First, he finds the hot new girl carrying around stakes then hears the school librarian blathering around about vampires and demons and the like. Nothin’ like makin’ Buffy into some comic book heroine on top of bein’ a natural beauty to draw the boy in. Catnip to the kitty. No wonder he started hangin’ around all the time.’

 

“Buffy, you must prepare. There is something coming soon,” Giles was warning his reluctant Slayer.

 

“This is Sunnydale, how bad an evil can it be?”

 

***

 

Buffy prepared to check out the nightlife of a living kind while Joyce continued to give her pep talks on how things were going to be so wonderful for them there. It was nice that since the divorce Joyce had cut back on her drinking. Maybe the move would be a positive one after all, or so Buffy hoped. ‘After all, it’s only one dire warning and one dead body so far. That’s a step up.’

 

Buffy was almost at the large door with The Bronze in relief when she sensed she was being followed. ‘No way am I going to lead some nasty into a club full of kids.’ She detoured down an alley and felt the shadow also change direction and follow. ‘Yup, proof it’s not just some kid also headed for a night of dancing and loud music.’

 

Spike spotted Angel right away and was surprised it took Buffy as long as it did to notice she was being followed.

 

“What’s this asshole up to?” He knew that Angel had been shown Buffy but that was back in L.A., now the git was here in Sunnydale. Sure he knew that Angel showed up here eventually but had no idea that he was one of Buffy’s first contacts. “Already stalkin’ her like he used to all the pretty young blonde girls… pervert!”

 

He had to smile as Buffy quickly and neatly pulled herself up into a handstand on a pipe stretched above the alleyway. Angel, clueless dolt, didn’t even look up! He’d cleaned up since Spike saw him last but evidently all the rodent scents he’d been wallowing in must have kept him from the clear scent of Slayer. ‘Maybe he’s just not that good at tracking.’

 

Buffy swung down and in a move that Spike was certain he’d be able to wank off to for a few years caught Angel with her feet knocking him to the pavement. 

 

Angel put on his best innocent look. “Is there a problem ma’am?”

 

“Yeah, there’s a problem. Why are you following me?”

 

“I know what you’re thinking. Don’t worry, I don’t bite.”

 

“Don’t do much else either,” Spike snarked.

 

Buffy didn’t let down her guard. No way was she going to mugged or assaulted on her first night out in her new town.

 

“Truth is,” Angel grinned. “I thought you’d be taller or bigger muscles and all that. You’re pretty spry though.”

 

Spike rolled his eyes. “THIS is the kind of line it took to get this girl?”

 

Buffy narrowed her eyes. Seems this guy knew something about her but what? “What do you want?”

 

“The same thing you do.”

 

‘Doubt that,’ Buffy huffed. ‘You don’t look like you want to be a normal high-school girl.’ Really, if that was his come-on line it sucked worse than a vampire.

 

“Okay, what do I want?”

 

Angel took a step towards her and put on the serious look of a predator. “To kill them. To kill them all.”

 

Buffy stared at him for a moment. She had no idea how this guy seemed to know about her being the Slayer but it seemed like he might. “Sorry, that’s incorrect. But you do get this lovely watch and a year’s supply of Turtle Wax,” she crossed her arms. “What I want is to be left alone!”

 

Angel cut her off as she tried to turn back towards the club entrance. “Do you really think that’s an option anymore? You’re standing at the Mouth of Hell and it’s about to open.”

 

Buffy stopped in her tracks. First the Watcher guy now this creepy stalker and both with the vague warnings and demands that she be all choseny again.

 

The guy tossed a small box at her. “Don’t turn your back on this, you’ve got to be ready.”

 

“What for?”

 

“For the Harvest”

 

Okay, that was new. Buffy had a feeling this weird guy with the straight-up hair wasn’t talking about some apple bobbing thing.

 

“Who are you?” Buffy wondered if the Council had sent a couple of Watchers this time since Merrick had died so quickly. ‘They must have a breeding program.’

 

“Let’s just say I’m a friend.” 

 

“Yeah? Well, maybe I don’t want a friend.”

 

‘You tell him,’ Spike encouraged even knowing it was futile.

 

“I didn’t say I was yours.” Then in a grand swirl of melodrama, he poofed his way out of the alley.

 

Buffy blinked then opened the box to reveal a necklace with a silver cross on the chain. ‘What is it with the Council and their weird howdy’s? Merrick tossed knives, the librarian with his old book, at least this one gives jewelry.’

 

“That’s it? He stalks her, prances around like some Nancy, drops little hints along with some cheap necklace and then slinks off into the night?” Spike was stunned. ‘How the hell does he worm his way into all these women’s lives with that act? ‘Sides why not just go reapin’ yourself if this harvest is so dangerous?”

 

*** 

 

The Bronze was as busy as you’d expect the only place in town for entertainment to be. Buffy had run into all the kids from school and Willow seemed stunned that Buffy noticed her much less seemed to want to befriend her.

 

“Of course she wants to be your friend, you silly nit. Buffy’s got a big heart and knows you’ve been overlooked.” Spike was so glad to see that Buffy had dropped her bitch-queen attitude from Hemery and gone back to the sweet girl he’d watched grow up.

 

After giving the shy girl good advice about getting out there and enjoying life she spotted the librarian up on the balcony looking like a fish out of water. Buffy sighed, ‘Might as well get this over with. Looks like they’re going to follow me everywhere until I give in anyway.’ She smiled at Willow, “Be right back,” she promised. 

 

“Oh, you don’t have to,” Willow ducked her head.

 

“I want to,” Buffy gave her a genuine smile and with that, cemented a lifelong friendship.

 

Giles wanted Buffy to reach out and feel the vampires. She remembered Merrick also seemed to think she could sense them but she had a terrible time doing it. “That one there,” she pointed to a vampire in the crowd.

 

“You feel the tingle?”

 

“No, I see the dated look. Come on, his clothes are SO five years ago at least and the same with that haircut too.”

 

Giles sighed. “Buffy you really must hone your skills. There is a prophecy, powerful vampires are going to be overrunning this town and you must be ready.”

 

“Been there, done that, got the medications to show for it,” Buffy quipped to Giles’ confusion. “Look, you and that other Watcher guy might as well let it go.”

 

“What other Watcher guy?”

 

“I got the message… Danger! Prepare! The Harvest!. Blah, blah, blah. If the vampires come, I’ll stake them just let me have my life when they aren’t around and stop following me!”

 

“I assure you that I am the only Watcher assigned here Buffy. What makes you think there is another?”

 

Buffy fingered the necklace she’d put on as a whim. “The guy who followed me into the alley gave me this.” She held up the cross. “ Dark, gorgeous in an annoying kind of way. I really didn’t like him.”

 

Spike smiled widely. “Wish you’d paid attention to those first impressions, Pet.”

 

“Went on and on about some harvest thing.”

 

Giles pushed his glasses up from where they seemed to have slipped a bit. “Harvest you say?”

 

Buffy watched as the fashion-challenged guy she’d pegged for a vampire sidled up to Willow and then as Willow got up to leave with him! 

 

“Tell me about this harvest.”

 

Buffy pushed past Giles, “Not now, Got to stop Willow from running out of Diem's to Carpe!” 

 

*** 

 

Spike wished he had his body because it was a bloody good fight. He’d forgotten that Darla was here in Sunnydale at this time. He remembered that he’d heard that she had dusted sometime before he got to town but it had been ages since they’d crossed paths.

 

His grand-mum, as Dru liked to call her, was kitted out like some high-school-girl porn character and had managed to lure one of Buffy’s new friends away. The one who struck out with the stuck up cheerleader over and over and reminded Spike a bit of William if he’d been obnoxious and not just unpopular.

 

Buffy managed to save both Willow and Xander but the other boy was taken by Darla while Buffy fought the lumbering vampire-scripture quoting lump that had the look of The Master all over him. 

 

He’d managed to trap Buffy in a sarcophagus and was spouting about how Buffy had no idea who she was dealing with. 

 

“Mate, you’re the one without a clue. Since you weren’t around when I got here my guess is she turns you into just so much ash. Slayer may be young but she’s got mad skills.”

 

The large vampire was continuing to sound like he belonged in a tent revival. “And like a plague of boils, the race of man covered the Earth. But on the third day of the newest light would come the Harvest. And the blood of men will flow as wine. When the Master will walk among them once more. The Earth will belong to the Old Ones and Hell itself will come to town,” he intoned. 

 

Spike snorted. “Please tell me I’m not related to Elmer Gantry here.”

 

*** 

 

Giles gave a quick “idiot’s guide to the supernatural” talk to the traumatized teens back at the school library when they regrouped.

 

Willow appeared to be in shock and Xander was clearly in deep denial. “Okay, this is where I have a problem. See, because we’re talking about vampires.”

 

“Isn’t that what we saw last night?” Willow looked dazed.

 

Buffy wasn’t looking forward to this part at all. She didn’t expect to be believed. Her own parents hadn’t after all. “No those weren’t vampires, those were just guys in thundering need of a facial. OR maybe they had rabies. It could have been rabies. And that guy turning to dust? A trick of light.” Xander gave her a dubious look. “That’s exactly what I said the first time I saw a vampire. Well, after I was done with the screaming part.”

 

“I need to sit down,” Willow whispered. 

 

Buffy patted her shoulder, “You are sitting down.”

 

“Oh, good.”

 

Gies picked up the ancient volume and began in a monotone. “The books tell the last demon to leave this reality fed off of a human and mixed their blood. He was a human form possessed. Infected by the demon’s soul. He bit another and another and so they walk the Earth feeding, killing. Some mix their blood with others to make more of their kind. Waiting for the animals to die out and the Old Ones to return.”

 

“We’ve got to go find Jesse,” Xander was wide-eyed in panic for his old friend.

 

“Your friend’s already gone, mate. Didn’t you get that part about feeding and killing?” Spike felt a bit sorry for the boy. It seemed that Jesse was the only real friend Xander Harris had save for Willow.

 

Giles went on to explain about Slayers and admitted to them that Buffy was the current Chosen One.

‘Huh, looks like these guys believe me at least.’ Buffy wasn’t sure if she was glad about that or worried.

 

“The big one said something about making an offering to some Master guy,” Buffy pointed out.

 

In spite of Giles warning that Jesse was likely already dead or, even worse, to be used as bait the teens insisted on a rescue mission. It didn’t take them too long to figure out that there had to be an entrance to the town's labyrinth of sewers and tunnels that made life as a vampire or demon easy here. 

 

Willow used her computer skills to get a schematic with little to no effort and plans began for Buffy to go save the boy if possible.

 

*** 

It wasn’t possible. He was bait, but not live bait. 

 

Jesse reminded Spike a bit of his mother after the turn. The demon was in full force and any affection he once had for his friends left with his soul. ‘Not sure why that is. I didn’t feel that different, neither did Sam. Maybe it all depends on the demon… or the human. Have to ask Rupes sometime see if we can make sense of it.’

 

The worst part in ending the grand Harvest was the toll it took on Harris to be holding the Stake that his best friend fell on when pushed from behind. Spike knew what it was like to see someone you loved become dust at the end of your own stake.

 

Buffy had been glorious and so very clever. She’d made a fool of the blathering Luke by tricking him into thinking he was about to burn in the sunlight from the broken skylight only to dust him and remind him that sunrise wasn’t for hours yet! Spike was very proud of his Slayer. Quick on her feet both physically and mentally.

 

“Looks like the Slayer’s back in business. Least she’s got friends this time, some backup. Have to admit the Watcher’s alright too.” Spike nodded in approval. “Wanker of a ‘helper’ wasn’t any use though. Can’t see why Buffy thinks so highly of the Poof. Can’t be because he did so much for her.”

 

*** 

‘Magic,’ Spike shuddered. ‘Bloody bitch of a mum to nearly destroy her own kid with it.’ He’d been disgusted seeing what Amy’s mother had been willing to do to try to regain what she thought of as her glory years. ‘Got our own loose cannon with Red back in the normal but at least her heart is good. Hope Rupes takes her in hand so it doesn’t consume her like this old bitch.’ 

 

Spike wasn’t as upset with Willow’s magic results as he probably should be. Somehow he fully expected to have this latest spell of hers end and to pick up his life, such as it was, where it left off with some alterations. At first, he’d tried to tell himself that seeing Buffy’s life would give him the edge he needed to finally defeat her. He’d long since given up that lie. Now he was just glad to have a chance to really understand her. 

 

‘Yeah, Dru had that one right,’ he snorted. ‘Got it bad for the Slayer. No point denyin’ it.’

 

He was starting to understand all of them actually. The boy had made him uncomfortable. It was so easy to simply despise the git. He had quite the mouth on him and a tendency towards bullying. Seeing Harris this way though had made Spike feel things he didn’t really want to in all truth. He had begun to see the boy who had been bullied himself so often that he had no self-esteem in him. William understood that more than he wanted to.

 

‘Now the kid finally has some social status and still gets the rug pulled out,’ Spike shook his head. 

 

The ego boost of having his teacher appear to lust after him, see him as a man, had vanished when he had found himself trapped in the creature’s nest. He could almost feel Xander’s humiliation as his status as a virgin was made public to the girls. He felt the bits of William within cringe in sympathy.

 

“And, of course, Peaches was little to no help. Thought he was supposed to be part of Buffy’s team, there to help the Slayer? Don’t see much help so far. Lots of half-arsed hints and partial information. Nothin’ really about the bug woman when they could have used a heads up. What kind of useless Wanker is he anyway?” Spike knew that if he’d been given the charge of helping Buffy he’d have been out shaking down info from demon sources on the regular so she’d know what was out there likely to hurt her and hers.

 

***

Spike laughed a bit as he watched Buffy brush up on Emily Dickinson all to impress the lad she had a crush on. Owen Thurman reminded Spike a little bit of his days as William the poetry-loving nerd.

 

Giles was prattling on about some prophecy. “I’ve looked at the writings of Aurelius himself, and he prophesied that the brethren of his order would come to the Master and bring him the Anointed.. A warrior that will rise from the ashes of the Five on the evening of the thousandth day after the Advent of Septus.”

 

Buffy was busy going over her wardrobe in her mind wondering just what would appeal the most to Owen. She’d never really dated a hot guy with such a sharp mind before and didn’t want to seem too much like a bubble-headed blonde who could only rhyme if it was part of a cheer.

 

“Buffy, did you hear me?”

 

“Huh?”

 

Giles repeated his translation.

 

“Well, we’ll be ready whenever it is.”

 

“Which is tonight.”

 

“Oh, no. No. No. No. Tonight I’m going to be dancing at the Bronze and talking up poetry with the first truly cool guy I’ve had a chance with since moving here. Ash boy can just wait till I’ve had my date.”

 

Watching Angel turn a lovely shade of Nile green when he found out that Buffy was at the Bronze with the boy was enough to make Spike chortle in gee. ‘Take that you Ponce. Girl has eyes for someone not you.’ 

 

Angel scolded Buffy about her duties but it didn’t dim her excitement about the upturn in her love life.

 

“Prick should just go suss out who the Annoyin’ one is, do ‘em all a favor instead of just tryin’ to be a fifth wheel for Buffy’s date.” Spike snorted. “Actually Gramps should have just gone in there and taken out the family for her. Never was intimidated by old Batface and they’d likely welcome him back like the second bloody coming if Darla had anythin’ to do with it. Could solve all Buffy’s problems before they get out of hand right easy. Instead, he bullies her and drops hints. Thought he was supposed to give her a hand?”

 

He watched as Buffy’s date devolved into a misguided romp in a morgue where Thurman displayed a bit of love for some rough and tumble along with his Dickinson. Since Spike knew well that the murderer they thought was the Anointed was not the little twerp he would later eliminate it was all for nothing. Well, maybe not nothing since Buffy had been outed and Owen was even more interested. 

 

Spike preened a bit as he thought about Buffy’s track record with crushes. ‘That Pike fella in L.A. had the whole bad boy in rebellion vibe. Now this Owen with his bookish ways and love of poetry and being drawn to a spot of violence. There’s Angel who’s a vam… well the less said about him the better. Looks like I might be able to check all her boxes! Good to know. She also wants someone who won’t leave so double check on that one. Now all I have to do is let her know all my many pluses when this spell ends.’

 

The day after the fiasco of a first date Buffy and Owen ran into one another much to his clear excitement. “I was wondering when I could see you again. I think you’re the coolest!”

 

Buffy was chuffed.

 

“I mean last night was incredible. I never thought nearly getting killed would make me feel so alive.”

 

Buffy looked uncomfortable. “So that’s why you wanna be with me?”

 

“When can we do something like that again,” Owen nearly begged. “...Like walk downtown at three A.M. and pick a fight in a bar. How about tonight?”

 

Buffy looked crestfallen. 

 

Too bad for the boy that Buffy decided it wasn’t safe to let him join the Scooby snacks. “He wants to be danger man.” Buffy explained to her friends. “You guys know the score, you’re careful. Two days in my world and Owen really would get himself killed, or I’d get him killed.”

 

Spike wondered what became of the boy. Hard to unlearn the hard truths of the world and he seemed the sort to seek out the adrenaline rush of demon-fighting now that he had a taste. Likely he was either dead or out there as one of those free-lance demon hunters with a death wish that popped up here and there. Van-Helsing wanna-be’s.

 

*** 

 

“Gonna rip his bleedin’ dick off,” Spike seethed. Watching Buffy fend off the Hyena possessed Xander had driven Spike completely off his trolley. At first, he’d felt a bit bad for the boy since he got in that mess by trying to be helpful but seeing Harris turn on both Willow and Buffy was more than Spike could take. 

 

“That bit of cruel runs deep in the boy.” The hurtful things he’s said to the girl who had always been his friend had to have gutted Willow even if she forgave him immediately. “Certainly showed darkness in how he tried to force himself on Buffy too.” Spike was certain that neither attack came from out of nowhere nor was laid at the door of the Hyena demon. Those thoughts were there in the human boy. The demon merely freed them.

 

“Boy has plenty of good in him. He’s brave and loyal managed to survive that family of his so he’s got inner strength. The ugly parts aren’t good though. Needs to have that nipped in the bud before he becomes his own worst self ‘cause he’s got it in him.” 

 

Seeing Rupert abet the boy in his lie was even worse. “Watcher hasn’t the excuse of youth. Buffy deserved havin’ the truth and a real apology. This way she feels guilty for any bad feelings she might have about what happened since she thinks Harris doesn’t remember. Same game Angel played when he got that soul shoved back in him. Girl has too much weighin’ on her already without carrying guilt for properly bein’ hurt or pissed at bein’ hurt by ‘em.”

 

“Consequences you Berk! These children won’t learn a thing if they don’t have consequences.” Spike screamed into the void unheard.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N:
> 
> Ahhh the constantly shifting landscape that is/was Sunnydale! In referencing the actual locale I had almost too much information because things changed regularly on the show. Maps are nice but none are canon and none are the same. One bit of canon is that Joss based the setting on Santa Barbara California with some alterations. https://tinyurl.com/y5ld3euv is the google map link for Santa Barbara. There is a university, zoo, etc. that work although it is a much larger city than Sunnydale was supposed to be. Sunnydale initially as given as having a population of 38,500 but over the course of the series dropped to 32,900 before the mass exodus. Santa Barbara in 1997 had a population of 85,872 so think of Santa Barbara only condensed.
> 
>  
> 
> Fandom Wiki isn’t too reliable but they have some pertinent info regarding the local in canon:
> 
> https://buffy.fandom.com/wiki/Sunnydale
> 
>  
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sunnydale
> 
>  
> 
> Things changed in Sunnydale with no explanation based on individual writers’ needs and whims. For example, it’s nearness to the ocean came and went over the years. Docks with ocean-worthy vessels and dockside warehouses vanished only to return as needed. Beach parties were shown more than once and the swim team that turned into fish had easy access to the ocean at one point. The cliff with the pagan temple where Dark Willow made her last stand before being defeated by love and a memory of a yellow crayon clearly overlooked the ocean. By the time of Chosen, the city appeared to be just a hole in the middle of the desert! 
> 
>  
> 
> There was the come and go airport. Forests that showed up only to disappear not to mention a cave system. 
> 
>  
> 
> I’ve tried to not play as fast and loose with the locale in this story but also not get bogged down in minutiae. Using the Santa Barbara model, Sunnydale in this story has the ocean on one side, wooded hills on the other and a desert nearby. It’s about 2 hours north of L.A. with a decent municipal airport and all the landmarks each episode utilized. 
> 
>  
> 
> Elmer Gantry trailer https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eHHUtg-o-8Q&feature=youtu.be (I highly recommend the film BTW)
> 
> Taste of a tent revival https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I28OiFeVy9o&feature=youtu.be
> 
> Small bits of dialogue (direct and paraphrased) from episodes:
> 
> “Welcome to the Hellmouth” and “The Harvest” written by Joss Whedon
> 
> “Never Kill A Boy On a First Date” written by Rob Des Hotel and Dean Batali


	51. Chapter 51

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [](https://imgur.com/G91bhu5)
> 
>  
> 
> Completing season 1 of the series in this chapter and also looking in on Spike and Dru as they try to find a way to cure her after the poisoning in Prague. We begin with the episode “Angel” which means there is some Bangel but no more than in canon.

Chapter 51

 

*** 

 

[](https://imgur.com/fj7GvwL)

 

They were at the Bronze as usual and Buffy kept looking around as if expecting someone. She hadn’t accepted a date since the disaster that was Owen Thurmond. Willow had been talking but Buffy was clearly not all there. Finally, she realized she’d tuned out her friend’s chatter. “I’m sorry, I was just thinking about things.”

 

“So are we talking about a guy?”

 

‘Teen-aged hormone bombs!’ Spike shook his head. ‘Wonder they manage to get an education or do anything else as preoccupied with boys as they are.’

 

“Not exactly a guy. For us to have a conversation about a guy there’d have to be a guy for us to have a conversation about. Is that a sentence?”

 

Willow giggled. “You lack a guy.”

 

“I do. Which is fine with me most of the time.”

 

“What about Angel?”

 

As little as Angel had been around Spike was surprised that Willow went there immediately. Truly aside from popping in with his dire warnings and unhelpful information he wasn’t exactly part of the group.

 

“Angel? I can just see him in a relationship. ‘Hi, honey, you’re in grave danger, I’ll see you next month.”

 

Ahhh, so she had noticed.

 

“He’s not around much, it’s true,” Willow nodded.

 

“But when he is around… it’s like the lights dim everywhere else, you know how that is?” Buffy had a dreamy look on her face.

 

“Bollox! It’s just fumes from the hair gel.” Spike wished with all his heart that he could stop this train wreck in the making. ‘Bastard managed to play the man of mystery card well enough to get her interested. Worked for his prey before. Too bad it works even now.’

 

Buffy was walking home from the night out and got that creepy feeling she was being followed. ‘Maybe it’s Angel doing his whole stalker thing.’ She whipped around and issued a challenge, “It’s late and I’m tired. Stop with the games.”

 

It wasn’t Angel. Spike recognized the Stooges as the vampires who called themselves The Three as if that made them super terrifying or the like. Admittedly they had managed to get the drop on Buffy and were giving her a real tussle. One of them managed to get her neck to one side and was coming in fangs first when Angel did show up.

 

“Finally! All he’s done is lurk around. Make yourself useful for once Peaches,” Spike coached from the sidelines.

 

Angel’s fighting skills relied more on brute force and his large bulk. He had never enjoyed the fight. His interests were always more along the lines of trickery, torture, and battles he knew he could win. He’d managed to come to the rescue but took a bit of metal to the chest in the process. Instead of finishing the three nitwits off, Angel chose to grab Buffy and flee like some buggering scared human.

 

They got to Revello drive and Buffy yelled for Angel to get inside. ‘Well there goes the neighborhood,’ thought Spike.

 

Buffy got his shirt off and went for the first aid kit to bind his wound. Even Spike could feel the sexual awareness between them. 

 

Buffy looked at Angel as if he hung the moon. “I was lucky you came along. How DID you happen to come along?” She was tenderly bandaging him and Angel was eating up the attention.

 

“I was just out walking.”

 

“So you weren’t following me?”

 

Angel gave her a shy grin and puppy eyes. “Now why would I do that?”

 

“Because you’re a bloody stalking pedophile?” Spike offered.

 

Buffy grinned, “Because you’re the ‘Mystery Guy that Appears out of Nowhere’. Not that I’m not happy about it tonight but …” she completed the nurse Buffy routine, “If you’re hanging around I’d like to know why.”

 

“Maybe I like you,” Angel practically simpered.

 

The moment was interrupted by Joyce returning home in the nick of time. ‘Stupid girl just told him to go get in her bed!’ Spike was horrified. ‘Hasn’t got a clue what she just did there.’ 

 

Buffy might innocently think she was just taking care of someone who had been wounded helping her out. Hell, Spike had seen Buffy and her mates all play slumber party together even the goofy boy but Angel was no goofy boy. “Bastard’s been around close to three centuries. His idea of a slumber party is so far out of Buffy’s imagination it might as well be like talkin’ to a space alien. He’s no Xander to be put off or friend-zoned. He’s gonna take this ball and run with it. Sees how to get under the girls alarms.” Spike had seen it over the twenty years he was tutored by the Berk. He really was amazed at how similar his approach was in ‘courting’ the supposed great love of his life to stalking prey back in the day.

 

*** 

 

Buffy had fobbed Angel off as being her history tutor. Joyce wasn’t completely stupid but was naive enough to think that her sixteen-year-old daughter would see the too-old young man out and all would be well since she was home. She had no idea how skilled at deception her daughter had become. ‘Or what a weasel Angelus can be.’

 

“I don’t want to get you in trouble,” Angel turned it on. Looking vulnerable and needy and manipulating Buffy into being the one to insist he do just what he fully intended to do anyway… get into that bed of hers.

 

“I don’t want to see you dead. They could still be out there,” Buffy insisted just as Angel knew she would. 

 

Buffy looked around her room and began to realize how inappropriate the whole situation was. “Um… there’s two of us and one bed. Why don’t you take the bed since you’re wounded.”

 

“I’ll take the floor,” Angel offered. Spike could see the gleam in his eye that was delighting in having his foot in the door at least. Angel could always play the long game as long as he felt certain of winning in the end. “Believe me, I’ve had worse.”

 

“Yeah, your rat filled alley where you belong,” Spike growled.

 

Angel played the half-truth game with Buffy who clearly had no clue that he was a vampire at all!

 

He soaked up the sympathy when he admitted his family had been killed by a vampire. ‘Yeah, YOU killed ‘em. Tell her THAT you wanker! See how quick she tosses your arse out that window.”

 

Buffy was pleased with having finally figured out why this guy was so interested in ‘killing them all’ as he’d originally told her was his goal. “So this is a vengeance gig for you.”

 

Angel quickly changed the subject and moved it to predator territory again, “You even look pretty when you go to sleep,” his feigned shyness was galling.

 

“How the hell do you know? Talkin’ her head off with lies and come-on’s, Haven’t seen her sleep. Yeah, she’s pretty asleep OR awake. She’s also pretty damned young but that’s a plus to you, innit?”

 

Spike was fairly certain that had Joyce not come home Angel would have lost his soul then instead of the next year. Buffy was ripe fruit just begging to be picked and Angel a practiced harvester.

 

*** 

 

Buffy had been gushing about her dashing hero who had been such a gentleman the night before. It was clear that Xander was jealous and WIllow nearly swooned with the ‘romance’ of it all. 

 

“God but Red is just begging to be someone’s dinner. Could lure her to her death with a few smooth words and doe eyes. Didn’t anyone ever teach these children about candy and strangers?”

 

“Come on! Wake up and smell the seduction. It’s the oldest trick in the book,” Xander showed surprising wisdom even if its roots were in jealousy. 

 

*** 

 

After school Angel made a predictable entrance. ‘Got to reinforce your wounded hero status.’

 

“I did a lot of thinking today. I really can’t be around you because when I am…” Oh he was laying it on thick! ‘Classic Angelus. Make the girl be the one to think she’s leadin’ you on so the blame’s all on her in the end.’ Spike felt his fangs pop out as his demon roared within.

 

“When I am, all I can think about is how badly I want to kiss you.” Catnip strewn about. “I’m older than you, and this can’t ever…” Kitten shows expected interest and takes a sniff. “I better go.” And… kitty wants to roll around as intended.

 

“How much older?”

 

Then the payoff, as rolling and purring commenced… er… they kissed. It was adult kissing and way out of Buffy’s wheelhouse but just right for a not-quite-a-woman but still ripe girl.

 

Angel pulled away abruptly, his demon had come rushing to the fore giving away the game.

 

“What is it?” Buffy immediately figured she was a lousy kisser. “What’s wrong?”

 

Buffy finally got a glimpse of Angel in full game face and let out an appropriate scream as her would-be lover made a quick leap out of her bedroom window, skidded down the roof to the ground below leaving Buffy watching in shock.

 

“No bloody control,” Spike shook his head. “One damned kiss and he loses it! What kind of Master vampire can’t keep his lumpies under wraps when kissin’ a girl?” Spike wasn’t sure if he wanted to laugh or rip the bastard’s tongue out and strangling him with it.

 

*** 

 

They were all shocked at Buffy’s story. Willow looked at her in sympathy as she tried to rationalize her not staking Angel out-of-hand. Buffy was struggling to find a reason why Angel could be a vampire yet still be a good person.

 

“A vampire isn’t a person at all,” Giles intoned. “It may have the movements, memories, even the personality of the person that it took over but it’s still a demon at the core. There is no halfway.” 

 

“Not really accurate but you keep on selling that one, Watcher. In Angelus’ case it’s more true than not.” Spike hated how the Twit seemed to think he knew so much about vampires and demons yet regularly proved how flawed all his knowledge was.

 

Xander was all but whittling stakes in his glee and eagerness to rid the world of this particular vampire.

 

“Who knew I’d have so much in common with Harris?”

 

While Xander was going over all the reasons Buffy needed to dust her love interest, Giles was going through his Council books trying to find something on Angel.

 

‘Not so bloody famous or important as you once were, Grandpops. Watcher hasn’t a clue.’

 

Finally, Giles stumbled on the connection and the real name of the demon stalking his Slayer. As with most of the Council’s information, it was … lacking.

 

“... Angelus leaves Ireland and wreaks havoc in Europe for several decades then about eighty years ago he appears to have come to America and begins to shun other vampires, living alone. There’s no record of him hunting here.”

 

“Never did socialize much outside of family,” Spike was singularly unimpressed with the account of the patriarch of the Whirlwind.

 

Willow looked relieved. “So he IS a good vampire! No killing and maiming.” She turned a hopeful smile on a downcast Buffy.

 

Giles cleared his throat. “I said there is no RECORD of his killing. Vampires hunt and kill, it’s what they do.”

 

“Well, duh,” Spike rolled his eyes. “So do humans. Okay, most don’t hunt now just prowl the supermarket but still…”

 

Xander raised his hand as if in class, “Um… question. A hundred years or so ago before he became an immigrant-Vamp… what was he like then?”

 

“He was like all of them. A vicious, violent, animal.”

 

“Got that right,” Spike nodded. “Still is. Don’t let the veneer fool ‘ya.”

 

Buffy was still trying to find a way to avoid having to rid herself of Angel. 

 

Spike was pacing about in irritation that Angel had managed to ingratiate himself so deeply with so little effort. ‘No wonder none of this lot trust me. Trusted too easy with Angelus and look what it got ‘em. Bastard! Always has to ruin things for me even before I come on the scene!”

 

Neither Spike nor any of the others noticed the blonde vampire cosplaying Sailor Moon who had listened to every word with a smirk on her devious face.

 

*** 

 

Buffy rushed into the house. 

 

‘Hell! I never heard about Angel bitin’ Joyce.” Spike was aghast.

 

“Get away from my mom!”

 

Angel growled and lowered Joyce to the floor then ran through the living room window and into the bushes surrounding the porch. 

 

“You’re not welcome here. You come near us and I’ll kill you.”

 

Buffy rushed to her unconscious mom in a panic finding relief when she discovered Joyce’s pulse even if a bit thready. “Mom! Can you hear me?” She grabbed the phone and punched in 911 calling for help. 

 

“Hang in there mom. We’ll get you to the hospital and then I’m going to kill a vampire.”

 

*** 

 

Once the still unconscious Joyce was settled and getting a needed transfusion Buffy began to let anger replace terror. The gang had all rallied to her call and gathered at the hospital.

 

“Just make sure she’s safe while I handle this.”

 

*** 

She tracked Angel with less difficulty than she had expected. “I know you’re there. I know what you are.”

 

“Do you?”

 

Buffy whirled to face him as he lurked in the shadows. 

 

“I’m just an animal, right?”

 

“You’re not an animal. I like animals.”

 

The empty Bronze became Thunderdome without the audience as Buffy and Angel fought and struggled. “I invited you into my home and you attacked my mom!”

 

“Why not? I killed mine. I killed them all, then I killed their friends and their friend's kiddies. For a century I brought death to everyone I met and did it with a song in my heart.”

 

Buffy stopped cold, shocked at his honesty and the seeming indifference of his admission. “What changed?”

 

“I fed on a girl about your age. Beautiful but dumb as a post, a favorite with her family though. Her clan was less than pleased.”

 

“Clan?”

 

“Romany. The elders conjured the perfect punishment for me and restored my soul.”

 

“Not that perfect. Gave you a loophole,” Spike spat.

 

“When you become a vampire the demon takes your body but doesn’t get your soul. That’s gone. No conscience or remorse. It’s an easy way to live. I … I… You have no idea what it’s like to have done the things I’ve done and then being made to care.” He gave an anguished look. “I haven’t fed on a living human being since that day.”

 

Spike felt his jaw drop. “What the hell do you call Sam?”

 

“So you started with my mom?”

 

“I didn’t bite her.”

 

‘Huh?’ Spike had been puzzled by that but with the vast number of lies Angel had been spouting he didn’t know what to think.

 

“Why didn’t you say something?

 

“I wanted to.” Spike knew what he meant even if Buffy didn’t. Angel didn’t mean he wanted to say something, he meant he wanted to drain Joyce even if he hadn’t bitten her. “I can walk like a man but I’m not one. I wanted to kill you tonight.”

 

“Christ,” Spike was startled. “Thought that soul was so powerful it bleached you all white-like. I don’t have a bleedin’ soul but have no desire to see a hair on her head hurt. What the fuck is wrong with you?”

 

Suddenly a lilting feminine voice sounded from the shadows, “So you know that the saddest thing in the world is?”

 

“Darla!” Suddenly Spike saw the game. She must have been the one to attack Joyce. That didn’t excuse Angelus or explain why his idiot grandsire didn’t have the control or caring enough to keep his demon under his thumb.

 

“To love someone who used to love you,” Darla sounded wistful.

 

Buffy was dismissive but Spike knew that Darla did love the lummox, at least as much as she could love anyone as selfish as she was by nature.

 

“I made him. We shared everything.” Darla turned to her old lover. “You had a chance to come home and rule with me in the Master’s court for a thousand years but you threw that away because of her! You love someone who hates us. You’re sick and will always be sick.” She spun pointing a gun at Buffy. “You’ll always remember watching her die.”

 

Before Buffy could race for shelter Darla was gone in a cloud of dust leaving only Angel looking at her, stake in hand. As Buffy gaped at him he turned and slipped into the darkness and away from her.

 

*** 

 

Buffy held vigil at her mom’s hospital bed then pampered her at home after her release.

 

She’d been relieved to have her mother back up Angel’s story for the most part. Oh, she still didn’t believe in vampires but she did say it was a crazed teenaged girl who had stabbed her in the neck. She had no memory of Buffy’s history tutor or much of anything else helpful. 

 

Angel had stayed away for several days after Joyce was safely home but all good things come to an end. “I just wanted to see if you were okay… and your mom.”

 

“We’re both good. You?”

 

“If I can go a while without getting shot or stabbed I’ll be alright.” He was doing his best to regain that hero status with a subtle reminder of his original injuries and his last-minute save with Darla. “Look, this can’t…”

 

Buffy broke in, “Ever be anything. I know. For one thing, you’re like two hundred plus years older than me.”

 

“I just have to walk away from this.” He put on his best tragic romantic hero face.

“I know, me too.” Buffy was just young enough to buy it.

 

Spike wasn’t certain which of the two made the first move but to his disgust, they were in each other’s arms and kissing like the world was about to end. “And the predator scores again,” he noted in disgust. “Played her like a fiddle. Poor kid’s too young to see a game when it starts. I wondered how he wormed his way into her knickers. She didn’t have a chance.”

 

*** 

 

After all the angst and high drama of the grand reveal of the great Poof’s secret the next weeks were anticlimactic. 

 

Sure Spike was amused watching them all deal with the computer demon Moloch. “No wonder Red moved on from computers to magic. If you’re goin’ to be wrestlin’ with the demonic might as well go old-school.”

 

The demon-hunting dummy had him rolling. “If all demon hunters were like that Sid fella we’d all be dead from laughin’. Don’t need size, just throw us all off by how ridiculous he looked. Have us staked good and proper while we’re doubled over!”

 

Sometimes it was good to laugh. After seeing how Angel had set up Buffy and how she fell into his trap he needed a laugh or two knowing where it was heading.

 

*** 

 

Spike felt sympathy for the boy, Billy who had been abused and bullied into a coma. The only positive thing about the whole nightmare was that he had all the information he’d ever have once hoped for about the deepest fears of Buffy, Giles and her little gang of do-gooders. Of course, now he had no intention of ever using the information.

 

Then again he wasn’t sure just what he could do using spiders, clowns and being unprepared to sing opera or finding yourself naked in public. “Even I’m not that creative with evil.” 

 

Buffy’s terror at the idea of being turned made sense given her calling but it should have made her nervous in her boyfriend choice. That soul of Angel’s didn’t really change the man within. Frankly, Spike was surprised that he hadn’t tried turning Buffy just to keep her forever. “Always was a selfish and controlling bastard with or without a soul.”

 

He’d learned their fears, their weaknesses, but it didn’t matter now. There was no way he’d ever deliberately hurt his girl and hurting those she loved would only hurt her so they were safe as houses too.

 

It was a good deal more frightening seeing what happened to the poor overlooked girl a couple of weeks later. ‘Those government types are likely connected to the same group who put bits of wire in my noggin’.’ Now THAT was something worth calling a nightmare.

 

“Kinda hope that Marcie girl got away from ‘em.’

 

*** 

 

“What the bloody hell?” Spike was incredulous watching as Giles, the Kalderash woman and Angel all discussed the prophecy as if it was written in stone and not some musty old book. “Fuck prophecy. Fate’s a bunch of crap. We make our own choices with free will you bastards. That’s one thing they got right. If it says the Slayer will die thanks to the old Bat then simple it up. Keep her away from him! No reason Angelus can’t go in and get rid of the bastard. Never liked him anyway.”

 

Buffy broke his heart trying to quit. “I’m sixteen. I don’t want to die.”

 

Spike cringed remembering all the Slayers he’d fought and the two he’d killed. No doubt they’d felt that way once before the whole ‘one girl destined to be fucked over by the Powers’ stuff finally got to them and made them cozy up to dying. “THAT’S what happens when you forget to fight the whole ‘fate and destiny’ crap… a shiny death wish and a dead Slayer.” Well, NOT his girl!

 

Until it was…

 

*** 

 

He had to give it to her. Took a lot of courage going into the lion’s den expecting it to be a one-way trip.

 

Buffy had clocked Rupert pretty hard knocking him out to stop him from doing the honorable thing and taking her place. “Least the Berk came around in the end.”

 

Spike tried to console himself that somehow Buffy would win the day. “Had to have beat the Old Moron or she wouldn’t have been there when I made my grand entrance.

 

“Where the hell is Angelus? Know she didn’t wallop him on his giant empty cranium to keep HIM away like she did the Watcher,” Spike fumed. 

 

“Put up or shut up you miserable fuck,” Spike ranted at his absent grand-sire. “If you love the girl and are really here to help her ‘kill them all’ then you’d fight heaven and hell to keep her safe and alive. You read the prophecy, even believe the soddin’ thing’s a done deal so where the bleedin’ hell are you? Lettin’ her face him and all his minions alone?

 

“Yeah, talk a good game but in the end, you’re still Angelus and it’s all about YOU. Screw the girl… wait... You do that later too and really muck her life up. Wanker!”

 

***

 

Spike watched helplessly as Buffy walked hand in hand with the vampire boy and confronted the ancient loon currently heading up the Order.

 

“You still don’t understand your part in all this, do you? You are not the hunter, you are the lamb.” The Master was circling Buffy trying to engage eye contact long enough to use his thrall on her. “I want this moment to last.”

 

He quickly knocked the crossbow from Buffy’s hands and had her by the neck in a blink. 

 

“Fight Buffy! Prophecy’s crap. Don’t let the death wish grab hold,” Spike urged her desperately. He felt impotent being unable to take action.

 

He watched in despair as Buffy fell under the power of the old vampire, her face filled with fear.

 

“You tried. It was noble of you,” The Master’s voice was taunting, mocking. “You heard the prophecy that I was going to break free and you came to stop me. Prophecies are tricky though. They don’t tell you everything.” He leaned in to whisper in Buffy’s ear. “You’re the one who sets me free. If you hadn’t come, I couldn’t go,” he gloated. “Think about that!” And he plunged his fangs into Buffy’s tender neck and drew deeply.

 

“O, GOD! The power!” He dropped Buffy face down into a small pool of water then with a shiver of anticipation pushed through the field that had imprisoned him and embraced freedom for the first time in sixty years.

 

*** 

 

“Come on Buffy!” Spike urged the fallen Slayer.

 

Sounds from the tunnel funneled into his consciousness. It was Xander and Angel. ‘Bit late but thank whatever Power’s on Buffy’s side someone came.’

 

“It’s too late, he’s gone up.” Angel looked like he wanted to be anywhere but where he was.

 

He and Xander spotted Buffy at about the same time and while Angel pulled her out of the water that was all he did. “She’s dead.”

 

Xander swallowed, then his jaw tightened. ‘Not on my watch.’ He glared at the vampire he’d had to force to lead him to the lair. “No. She’s not dead.”

 

“She’s not breathing,” Angel explained as if to a child.

 

“If she’s drowned there’s CPR,” Xander logically suggested.

 

“You have to do it. I have no breath,” Angel waffled.

 

“What the fuck? How you talkin’ if you have no bleedin’ breath! Got plenty of air to pontificate all over the place, to seduce little girls with sweet words and plenty of lies. What the hell is your problem?”

 

While Spike glared daggers at the lying asshole, Xander got busy saving Buffy’s life. 

 

Angel was worthless. He stood looking like the tragic lover who was cheated of his happy-ever-after and did nothing to help, not even to encourage the surprisingly useful human boy. He gave illustration to the term poser.

 

Just when Xander thought it was all over, Buffy began to cough and gasp for air. Her eyes moved between Xander and Angel who now drew himself up to give a heroic pose as if he’d actually been more useful than the average doorstop.

 

“Xander?”

 

“Welcome back.” There was a tremble to the boy’s voice and Spike vowed in that moment to forgive the kid for every unkind word and bullying act towards him as a reward for having saved his girl.

 

*** 

 

Spike watched with pride and pleasure as Buffy soundly kicked the Master's arse all the way to hell. She was firmly back in the saddle in spite of her recent death, quipping in fine form. She’d taken charge and given orders better than most Generals Spike had seen in action. She’d entered death still mostly a child but had risen a woman… one hell of a woman at that!

 

*** 

 

“Christ! That explains why there were two Slayers!” Spike thought about the improbability that Buffy was the only Slayer to die for a brief moment and return. “Got a feelin’ those Wankers with the Council had somethin’ to do with makin’ sure there was only one again.” He doubted Buffy or Giles would believe such an accusation but deep in his heart he knew there were dirty deeds done, he’d seen more than a few just in his years of hunting Slayers. “Wonder what happened after the spare kicked it thanks to Dru?”

 

***

 

[](https://imgur.com/uwG3VQu)

 

Spike and Dru had been seen by every witch, shaman, healer and other ‘expert’ in Eastern Europe and Spike was losing hope as Dru grew ever weaker.

 

It was like a macabre treasure hunt as one after another cure failed to work. One piece of helpful information that didn’t pan out after another.

 

The long journey had taken months and covered miles with nothing to show for it. Now they were in the parlor of a supposedly brilliant and ancient sage in a small but cozy home in Beirut. The ‘Paris of the Middle East’ was not what it once was. Too many wars. Too many refugees. Too much weariness now put a pall on the lovely city and snuffed the joy of the formerly friendly and cultured people. 

 

Spike had always wanted to explore the lands steeped in history and if this lead panned out perhaps he and Dru could indulge as they celebrated her renewed strength.

 

The man had those gentle Middle-Eastern eyes that bespoke wisdom and compassion. His hospitality harkened back to the better days in the region.

 

Abd-El-Kader’s name translated to ‘servant of the Powerful’ and Spike prayed to whatever deity might listen that some of that power was actually in his toolbox. The man had listened intently to the long story of Dru’s affliction and Spike had not dishonored him by lying or trying to sugar coat what he and Dru were or had been up to. The man hadn’t seemed to hold his demon status against him and had appeared willing to help if he could.

 

Spike sipped at the rich Lebanese coffee and relaxed a bit as the old man perused his many scrolls and manuscripts. 

 

“I know she’s mental but why doesn’t she see how hard she makes it on herself?”

 

The man didn’t look up from what he was reading but replied easily with a tone that inspired acceptance that he spoke from true and old knowledge. “Vampire demons, like most demons develop like human adolescents… no impulse control. A demon left to itself takes much longer to develop the skills. Vampires more so because having no impulse control feels very much like freedom. Like a human child often it leads to ill-considered results.”

 

Spike had no idea the age or background of the man. He only knew that everyone had said he had great wisdom and that if anyone could help Drusilla, this wise man would be the one. “Yeah, yeah… the whole soul thing. Heard about that from those Council wankers and the priestly types like the ones who tortured my black dove.”

 

Abd-El-Kader Set aside the book and looked at the vampire closely. Spike had no idea what the man saw but whatever it was seemed to satisfy him. 

 

“The so-called soul means nothing really. Some demons have souls you know, a bit different from human but not significantly.”

 

Spike felt his bristles rise, “I don’t have one OR need one.”

 

Abd-El-Kader nodded, “Vampires do not, that is true. That is why you are considered a half-breed, not a true demon. A soul CAN help a demon to grow just as humans do, help develop that self-control more quickly. That’s why the more advanced demons learn early to lay-low and not attract the Slayer or others who would slaughter them wholesale regardless of their nature. It’s called maturity, Spike,” his eyes danced with delight as the vampire startled at hearing his name from his lips. Spike had introduced himself as William when seeking help from the wise man.

 

“So you’re sayin’ that a soul that a vamp lacks is what leads to a fast track to maturity? That why most of my kind are daft idiots?”

 

“By no means! A soul is merely a tool. It’s up to the individual how or IF they use it! Not all humans embrace self-control and reasoned thinking… precious few truly master it OR themselves. 

 

“You are on the path, as many older vampires can choose to be. You control your demon when you choose and you usually think of consequences and weigh your choices, not letting the immature demon call the shots. It’s helped you survive, helped you to keep your Drusilla alive as well.

 

“Your lady hasn’t the capacity to fully mature because of the tragic madness. She will always be childlike in that respect and in her condition a soul would only punish her unnecessarily and harshly. I doubt she could withstand the return of her human soul.”

 

Buffy listened closely. Everything the guy said rang true. She decided to file that away with the other things she’d learned, things to ponder more about later.

 

“So, how can I cure my girl?” Spike hadn’t meant to get into a philosophical or theological discussion but couldn’t regret the sidetrack. The old man had made a lot of sense. 

 

Abd-El-Kader sighed deeply and closed the last dusty tome he’d looked into. He really did want to help this unfortunate couple. Both had suffered much in their long lives. “Not knowing the full nature of the poisons and possible magic used by her tormentors I cannot guarantee anything,” he said. Spike’s shoulders slumped and he hastened to continue, “...however. I can think of a couple of avenues.” 

 

Spike closed his eyes in weariness. Was this going to be yet another dead end? “We’ve tried everything and will continue tryin’ till I’m dust till I get the result she needs.”

 

Abd-El-Kader fingered his beard. “There are the trials, of course. An Asphyx demon named LLoyd, in particular, would be a good choice. There are others but they move about. Lloyd stays there in Africa, the locals worship him. I can give you directions.”

 

“How’s that work?”

 

“Well, it usually doesn’t. Only one time that I know of in history or lore where the petitioner survived the trials and got to name their reward. That idiot squandered it on a ring of protection that made him invulnerable but only when wearing it. He didn’t have the wisdom to realize others would seek to take it from him and that his life would be forfeit along with his prize. Last I heard the ring and the rest of his treasure were buried near the great western Hellmouth in the new world.”

 

Spike looked very interested as Dru continued to stare into the distance with blank eyes.

 

“You take the trials and tests put to you and should you survive you can name your prize. I suppose that would be one way to cure your sire.

 

“Another idea is that Hellmouth I mentioned, itself. There is a lot of mystical energy there. That’s why so many demons are attracted to it even at risk of their lives. It gives strength and also increases the power of any magic used. Just going there would likely help her as would imbibing sires blood.”

 

Spike sat up straighter. “Don’t know where the great poof is, be glad to feed him to her. Owes her.”

 

Dru’s head snapped up and her eyes looked more lucid than they had in a month. “Spike, the Pixies say to keep far from the Dark Continent. It leads to madness and death for my Knight. Mustn’t touch the forbidden fruit, my Adam. 

 

Spike shuddered. “Can always risk it as a last resort. Bit of a nuclear option. Okay, we’ll try that Hellmouth in California first. Can always head off to pay Lloyd a visit if that doesn’t pan out.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N:
> 
> Small bits of dialogue (direct and paraphrased) from episodes:
> 
> “Angel” written by David Greenwalt
> 
> “Prophecy Girl” written by Joss Whedon
> 
> Season 1 had 12 episodes. Angel appears in 7 of them. (Welcome to the Hellmouth, The Harvest, Teachers Pet, Never Kill a Boy On a First Date, Angel, Out of Mind, Out of Sight and Prophecy Girl)
> 
> In fact, after the Episode “Angel” he is unseen for the next 3 episodes until “Out of Mind, Out of Sight” and finally “Prophecy Girl”. He and Buffy weren’t paired romantically until the episode “Angel”. If the grand romance seemed to come from out of the blue to you there is a good reason. I suggest a re-watch of S1 to note how little Bangel there was until suddenly it was the all-consuming love story in Angel only to have him pretty well disappear once more and fade to background.
> 
> Lebanese coffee https://www.mamaslebanesekitchen.com/drinks/lebanese-coffee-turkish-coffee/
> 
> Beirut tour (current era)https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WBfGyaJZ7PY&feature=youtu.be
> 
> Before war and terrorism became the first thing many think of when they hear “Middle East” the region was well known for their hospitality. The emphasis on hospitality goes back to ancient times when taking care of the needs of a traveler meant the difference between life and death. http://www.crivoice.org/travelers.html
> 
> There is still a code that demands hospitality in the region
> 
> https://www.transitionsabroad.com/listings/travel/articles/hospitality-in-the-middle-east.shtml
> 
> It is still considered an honor in Lebanon to welcome strangers. The Lebanese take pride in their hospitality. It is considered an honor to host guests, therefore invitations to attend dinner or events at Lebanese homes are often offered quite early on in friendships. https://culturalatlas.sbs.com.au/lebanese-culture/lebanese-culture-etiquette


	52. Chapter 52

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [](https://imgur.com/LOp6yx2)

Chapter 52

[](https://imgur.com/fj7GvwL)

“Jeffery is sooo rad as a boyfriend. I mean I should have known you were cuckoo for cocoa puffs when you let him get away.” Jennifer wasn’t at all sorry for having stolen Buffy’s boyfriend while she’d been busy saving the world.

None of her old friends had welcomed her back. Not that she’d been expecting them to throw her a party, but she’d been with her posse for all of middle school then at Hemery before Merrick had turned her life upside-down. Most of the girls had been her friends all the way back to childhood.

What broke Spike’s heart more than watching Buffy’s humiliation, rejection, and ostracism was seeing her toss and turn then wake in a cold sweat night after night.

“Girl died. Not surprised she’s got issues. Hell, she’s a child soldier like those poor little bits over in Africa and the Middle East who’re kidnapped and forced to fight. Like as not got the beginnings of PTSD and no one to listen to her talk about it. Wind up back in the loony bin if she tries.”

Buffy was in L.A. for the summer. The custody arrangement between Joyce and Hank let him have her during the summer break from school and every other major holiday. This was the first time Hank had been in town to have Buffy with him since the divorce. Christmas had seen him in Spain and spring break found him busy in Rome.

Buffy had hoped he’d have her join him in one or both places. She longed to see the world outside of California and the Illinois farm… anywhere far from the Hellmouth actually. She also wanted her dad’s love again. Since the fire at Hemery, he’d been more distant than ever.

This time he was in L.A. with no excuse to not have his daughter visit. Not that he spent much time with her. He encouraged her to look up her old friends and ‘go have some fun’. Gave her his credit card to splurge at the mall and otherwise, they passed like two ships in the night.

Spike was convinced that Hank had no interest in taking his court-approved parental time. He’d only made an issue of it to get under Joyce’s skin with the divorce. Buffy was a pawn in their private war.

There were parties and her old gang made sure she knew about them. They also made sure she knew that she’d be persona non grata if she showed her face.

“Too bad that low-life fish boy you got hooked up with dumped you too,” Tiffany sneered.

“Yeah, he and his tots uncool losers who crashed our dance and trashed it AND our reps… as if WE knew them because of you… disappeared when they netted you, firebug!” Nicole taunted. “Maybe go hang in a lower tax bracket, make new friends.”

“Oh! Or one of those halfway houses for juvies. Maybe some of them would want to hang out with a total loser just out of a straight jacket,” Jennifer snickered and locked arms with Jeffery.

Buffy’s former boyfriend was smirking and then played obvious tonsil hockey with Jen just to rub salt in the wound.

“You really should sneak an appointment at Planned Parenthood and get checked for STDs, Jennifer. I hear AIDS is a hard way to die,” Buffy shot back. “Don’t know where Jeff’s been considering his recent taste in fuck toys.”

Spike was proud of her as she held her head high and stomped away from the L.A. branch of ‘The Mean Girls’.

“Well,” Buffy looked at her dad’s plastic platinum card, “Guess you still love me Mr. Mall Magic-Maker.”

Buffy threw herself into a few days of conspicuous retail therapy with abandon.

“No way she’s gonna fit all that in her closet back home.” Spike was impressed though. It was subtle revenge. Hank would have a fit when he got his next bill and it served him right. “Least he owes her is enough shoes and fancies to satisfy a small nation.”

*** 

Buffy packed the last box of her new wardrobe for the return home.

Hank had nearly forgotten she was there and had to be reminded that he had to drive her back to Sunnydale.

“Are you sure you can’t just take the bus, honey? I can ship your stuff and it’ll get there in a day or two.”

“Dad… mom’s expecting you to bring me home like you promised. “ Buffy blinked back tears.

Hank whined. “But I have something important scheduled and two hours there and two hours back just isn’t going to work.”

“Something more important than your only daughter?” Buffy spoke in a near whisper.

Hank patted her shoulder. “Course not, Princess. Guess your old man just got used to having you around and forgot he had to return you. Seems like we hardly had any time at all together.”

“That’s ‘cause you weren’t home to enjoy her, you wanker. Off with your latest bedmate or makin’ deals to get ahead, look good.” Spike hated Hank Summers with a purity of feeling that startled him.

Hank sighed. “Okay. I’ll rearrange my schedule and even…” he looked at the numerous boxes for the first time and blanched. “... rent a van to get you and your stuff back to the boonies.” he kissed her on the top of her head and walked away muttering to himself about how Sunnydale must not have many stores.

***

“They say travel teaches you things and this trip sure did.” Buffy had come to a lot of conclusions as she thought over the past year, years actually. Everyone around her either walked away or got killed in the end. Maybe if she hadn’t been the Slayer it would have been different, she didn’t know. She was tired of always losing, of all the good-byes and even worse the endings without even that.

Buffy wiped a tear as she walked to the rented van for the trip home. “I learned it’s toxic being my friend and too much trouble being my dad. I get friends killed or make them hate me in the end. Guess Merrick was right. A Slayer is meant to be alone in the fight and not meant for normal stuff. Lesson learned. I’m better off alone. And everyone else is safer too.”

“Not so Slayer! Your ties to others is what keeps you goin’.” Spike felt a flash of fear for his girl given her new attitude.

*** 

Buffy watched as the vampire jumped Xander as he yelled for Willow to run. Willow frantically looked around for something to use as a weapon instead of going.

‘Didn’t you guys learn anything last year? Why are you out in the open without some protection? Scratch that… why are you out at night at all?’ Buffy watched as the awkward battle with the newly risen fledge started to go south for the would-be monster fighters.

Buffy jumped in and saved their bacon with a series of kicks and flips finally tossing the vamp to the ground. “Hi, guys.” The newly-minted-Lost-Boy got up and headed directly towards the Slayer who snapped a branch off of a tree and staked him without even looking behind her. “Miss me?”

Spike was startled. “Where the hell did THAT come from? Didn’t even look! Yeah, it was a fledge and Buffy’s good, but not that good.”

Xander and Willow began to hug Buffy and jabber like a pair of over-excited puppies. Spike could see that the hugs from Xander were coming from a different place than those from Willow. ‘Boy still’s got it bad for the Slayer. Well, can’t fault his taste.’ He shook his head. ‘Bit like old William, reachin’ for the bloody stars and moon there, lad.’

Buffy had been scolding them for being out without even a cross.

“Well, it’s been a slow summer,” Xander explained. “That was the first vampire we’ve seen since you killed the Master.”

Buffy stiffened at the reminder. “It’s like they knew I was coming back.” Inside Buffy was thinking it proved her point. It was her presence that got people killed.

Spike saw her put on a brave but false expression as she lied to her friends about what a great time she had in L.A. She hinted at parties and hanging out. The kids were eating it up.

Willow and Xander caught Buffy up on the Sunnydale doings. “Giles buried the bones and poured holy water then did some weird chant. We got to wear robes!” Willow was clearly excited. “Have you seen Giles yet?”

Buffy looked at Willow, smile gone and her voice hard. “Why would I call Giles? I’ll see him at school.”

“Uh-oh,” Spike couldn’t keep from grinning a bit. “Someone’s in the dog house. At least the Watcher tried to do something useful unlike Captain Useless of the Giant Forehead Division.”

Spike watched as Buffy showed her desire to put distance between herself and her friends. He could almost feel the chill in the air. 

That night Buffy woke with a start again and shook for a good hour afterward. From her murmuring, it was obvious she’d been dreaming of old Bat Face.

“Poor Dove gets no peace. No wonder she can be a right bitch at times. Even her dreams aren’t a break from it all.”

*** 

Buffy’s other reunions were about as warm as the one she’d had with Willow and Xander. She wasn’t overtly cutting or cruel but the atmosphere was like a meat locker.

Giles’ attempts to get Buffy to show concern for the increase in vampire activity was met with seeming unconcern. Her nonchalance was a feint as Spike could clearly see. The others were puzzled by her demeanor but not worried. Giles seemed to chalk it up to adolescent petulance and lack of discipline.

‘Should be worried there. Bint’s flirtin’ with that death wish. Pay attention Watcher. Dyin’s changed your girl.’ Spike had noticed that more than her attitude had altered with her return from the dead. She was faster, stronger too; more skilled. ‘Like she got a bit of a power boost or somesuch.’

She still wasn’t good enough to go one-on-one with the Slayer of Slayers and win but she was good enough to catch his fancy when he finally did meet her.

As far as Peaches was concerned, he’d been keeping a low profile. ‘Likely heard about some of the changes and wants to be sure she won’t greet him with a pointy bit of wood for leavin’ her to die like that. Wanker!’

*** 

Every night the dreams came and Buffy woke in a sweat, freaked out and shuddering. Spike wished he knew what she was seeing. Was it just a replay of the trauma or one of those Slayer dreams that just made her life more angst-ridden?

Spike noticed that she would look in his direction as if her subconscious had no choice but to reach out to him even if she’d spent years stubbornly ignoring his presence.

Buffy pulled her gaze from Spike and stared, wide-eyed, at her window reacting to a small sound. “Hello?”

‘Enter the Grand Poof himself. Evidently feeling more secure skulkin’ about in the sleeping girl’s bedroom instead of approaching face-to-face like a gentleman.’

“Mind if I come in.”

Buffy shrugged and it made Spike smile seeing she wasn’t too excited seeing her supposed boyfriend again. ‘Too bad you didn’t keep that part of your new attitude, save us all a world of hurt if you had.’

“How are you?”

“Peachy with a side of keen,” Buffy raised a brow. “So is this a social call? It’s kind of late but guess for you it’s… what… lunch hour?”

“It’s not a social call,” Angel drew himself up in all of his self-important glory.

Buffy sighed, “And that means ‘danger Will Robinson’. God, it’s good to be home.”

“Sorry,” he looked anything but that. “I wish I had better news.”

“Let me guess. Some of your cousins showed up for a family reunion and we’re all on the menu.”

“The Anointed One,” Angel intoned gravely. “He’s been gathering forces somewhere in town. I’m not sure why.”

‘Pfft, you useless clod. I was in Sunnyhell five minutes and found the Brat. Took just as long to turn him and his scripture quotin’ sycophants into so many dust particles. Why haven’t you done it already?’

“You don’t sound too concerned,” Angel furrowed his brow in a rare change of facial expression.

“I can handle myself.”

“Don’t underestimate the Anointed One just because he looks like a child. He has power over the rest of them. Its source is deep and old. They’ll do anything for him.”

Spike rolled his eyes. “You’ve GOT to be kidding me! Took the brat without breaking a sweat.”

“Is that it?” Buffy affected boredom. “Is that everything? ‘Cause you woke me from a really nice dream.”

“Sorry, I’ll go.”

‘You do that, Peaches. Girl doesn’t need you, never did.’

As Angel exited, he gave her his wounded puppy #3 look and whispered, “I missed you.”

Buffy gulped but something inside her crumpled just as Angel had intended. Her ‘I missed…” came too late for the big lug to relish his small victory but Spike knew that Angelus knew he’d scored a hit. ‘One thing the old bastard knows is how to play young girls with a strong romantic nature and not enough self-preservation instincts.’

*** 

Buffy had finally agreed to meet the gang at the Bronze and as she was making a bee-line to the waving Willow, Angel appeared in her path. “Hi again.” Buffy’s voice had an edge of irritation to it. ‘If he’d missed her so much… where had he been?’

“Hi.” He didn’t move out of her way but also did nothing more than block her path. Buffy was annoyed and it showed.

“Is there danger at the Bronze? Should I beware?”

Angel gave her a hurt look guaranteed to elicit sympathy and guilt. “I can’t help thinking I’ve done something to make you angry. That bothers me more than I’d like. What are you afraid of? Me? Us?”

Buffy’s jaw dropped. “Could you contemplate getting over yourself?”

Spike snorted, “No. Full of himself, always was, always will be.”

“There IS no us. I’m sorry if I was supposed to spend the summer mooning over you but I didn’t. I moved on… to the living.” She turned her back on the gobsmacked vampire and headed straight towards Xander.

“That’s tellin’ him, pet. Solid blow to the great ego, that. ‘Course that’ll only encourage the Berk.”

Buffy noted Angel still lurking in the shadows and pulled Xander to the dance floor moving as if in one of Xander’s best wet dreams.

“Too bad the show’s all for the great Git, lad.” Spike felt sorry for the boy.

“Xander, did I ever thank you for saving my life?” She rubbed against the excited boy who was clearly expecting a kiss at long last. “Don’t you wish I would?” Then she turned and left the dance floor and the Bronze leaving a decimated Xander in her wake.

Outside, she ran into Cordy who had witnessed the whole performance. Even the Queen Bitch of Sunnydale had cringed at how Buffy had treated first Angel and then the luckless Xander.

“You’re really campaigning for bitch of the year aren’t you?”

“As defending champion, are you nervous?”

“I can hold my own. Look, I don’t like you much but you have on occasion saved the world and all that stuff so I’m gonna do you a solid.”

“Oh, joy.” Buffy rolled her eyes like a pro and tried to pass.

“Your friends can’t do it ‘cause they like you and they’re a bit afraid of you too. Here’s some advice…”

“Excuse me?” Buffy scoffed. Just who did Cordelia think she was anyway?

“Whatever’s causing the Joan Collins ‘tude, deal with it. Embrace the pain, spank your inner moppet, but get over it ‘cause pretty soon you won’t even have the loser friends you’ve got now.”

Buffy glowered at the other girl, ”Mind your own business.” Cordy was smart but not smart enough to see that her prediction was just what Buffy was aiming for. It wasn’t a threat… it was a goal.

Buffy turned to leave, not noticing when two vampires grabbed Cordy and carted her off into the night.

***   
Cordy was the first followed by Miss Calendar.

Buffy had been horrified seeing the Master’s empty grave and had rushed to report it to her Watcher.

Giles had researched right away and stumbled on his Latin translations. “They need the bones… which they have,” he looked at Buffy in apology. “This next part is unclear but it seems to translate to them needing the blood of the closest person, must be someone connected to the vampire.”

Spike looked over the Watcher’s shoulder and gave him an incredulous look. “NO, you dolt! The word means literally close as in physical, not some connection. Nearest physically to the old bat. What kind of Watcher can’t properly translate Latin? Don’t they teach you lot anything right?”

Buffy took Giles’ words the same way Rupert had and concluded that they would need her blood.

The rock-mail answered the question about where and who. Cordy’s necklace attached to the note that had been launched via rock got everyone’s attention.

“I go to the Bronze and save the day,” Buffy shrugged. Just another day at the office. She’d known it would be her job. It would be her job for the rest of her likely far-too-short life.

Giles and Willow tried to convince Buffy that it was a trap to no avail. “This is my fight.” Buffy gathered her weapons and headed out.

As she neared the Bronze Angel showed up. ‘In time to be a help for once,’ Spike snarked.

Buffy hadn’t been overjoyed to see him even though Angel had offered to watch her back. She’d even suggested fighting HIM instead. “Come on. You must have wondered… a vampire, the Slayer… I know you’ve thought about it. If it came down to a fight… could you take me? Why don’t we find out?”

Clearly Buffy didn’t know Angel at all. ‘Never one to fight someone who could win in a fair fight. Only way Angel would take on a Slayer would be usin’ tricks, maybe some minions, wait for her to be weak for some reason. No one-on-one battle for him against the bloody Chosen One.’

“Don’t you have somewhere to be?” Angel deflected her challenge.

“Yeah, there’s the Angelus I know and loathe.” Spike gave a burst of laughter.

The Bronze had been a trap, but not for Buffy. Xander was furious with her for not being there to stop the vamps from taking Giles and Willow and leaving him bloody.

***  
A bit of rather creative torture using her cross led the vampire who had been the distraction at the Bronze to a quick confession. Buffy knew where to find the ritual site without much effort so all that was left was to go and save the day.

Angel and Xander were both in tow and they didn’t have to go far.

Angel had actually fought, taking out a minion. All-in-all the self-proclaimed Big Bad Master Vampire was as much help as Xander.

Nonetheless, the captives were freed without losing any of their blood, the Master’s bones were smashed to powder and Buffy was back in everyone’s good graces.

Buffy was finally home, back in the bosom of her makeshift family. The prodigal forgiven and all returned to the norm.

***  
The gang was back in the saddle in no time.

Spike didn’t know what made him laugh more. Watching Giles practice pick up lines to an empty chair or seeing a newly risen vamp knock Angel arse over teakettle with a well-aimed shovel?”

Even with the gang in working order, it took a while for them to figure out that a couple of their classmates were building a Franken-Bint from three dead girl parts.

Xander impressed Spike with some insights that he’d never have expected from the boy. “People don’t fall in love with what’s right in front of them. People want to dream. Want what they can’t have. The more unattainable, the more attraction.”

Spike gazed at Buffy with longing. “Bit of truth there, lad. Buffy will never want the likes of me. Can’t even blame it all on Angel and the mess he left either. I didn’t make a great first impression and the girl has a long memory.”

Spike understood the pain the reanimated football player, Daryl, the sad monster, felt when he vowed not to live alone. Being alone was like a slow death for any social being really.

“Still, not the best way to find a partner. Building a girl and forcing her to be with you isn’t love. If it isn’t love you get back, better to be alone.”  
***

Buffy’s new principal was an utter troll who clearly loved to throw his weight around to make himself look like a big man. Someone important at least in his own mind.  
“Angel should have put the fear of fangs in him. Get him to ease up on Buffy. Girl has enough on her plate without having to deal with this rodent every day.”

He listened to the little man rant. “Threatenin’ to toss her from school for somethin’ done a year and whole other city ago!” Spike wished he could rip the Wanker’s throat out as he watched Snyder strut around threatening his girl and another chit who looked vaguely familiar. “Try scarin’ the kids with no throat you gormless tit!”

Now Buffy was having to plan and put together some meet-and-greet for parents on top of her other duties. Then she got a lecture from Joyce about how important it was for Buffy not to get into trouble yet again. Reminded her daughter why they’d moved to this backwater in the first place. His Slayer was not having a good day at all and it was all coming from humans who didn’t know a good thing when they saw it.

As Buffy prettied herself up for the club, Spike suddenly put the pieces together and realized what he was seeing… or more to the point, about to see. He remembered what she’d been wearing, how she’d shone.

Buffy was getting ready for a night out at the Bronze and a date with destiny. “Well… things are about to get interesting.”

***  
[](https://imgur.com/uwG3VQu)

Dru was fading in and out for the last hundred miles. Her strength continued to seep from her steadily. She was curled on the seat next to Spike with her head in his lap (and not in the fun way he so-loved) as the DeSoto neared the exit leading to the Hellmouth.

“Hope the energy here does perk you up, luv. Like a flower in the desert, just need the tiniest bit of rain to bloom like crazy,” he smiled and tried to put on a hopeful face.  
Dru wasn’t up for conversation really but looked up at her Dark Knight. “The music’s started and a chair removed. Soon we’ll all scramble when the tune ends.” Her eyes closed then opened again and she smiled widely. “Daddy’s coming ‘ome soon and all will be well.”

Spike frowned and his demon surged forth in irritation. ‘I do everything for her and she always calls out for her the Bleedin’ Bastard who addled her mind.’

Dru turned her gaze from Spike to the back, locking eyes with Buffy. “Sunshine loses its glow for a while. Burns just the same. Will burn you, my Spike,” she continued staring at the invisible Buffy. “Should chose to warm not burn but you won’t, not now. Don’t see ‘is worth.”

Spike rammed the car into and over the ‘Welcome to Sunnydale’ sign and pulled to a stop. He had the need to have a tiny distance from his lady-love for a moment. Get back control.

He laid her head on the seat and got out. He was still in game face from his reaction to hearing Dru yearning for her daddy again. Wouldn’t do to make his entrance with his demon running amok.

“Home sweet home,” he looked around with a sneer and lit a cigarette. “Gonna be a real slap and tickle, can tell it already,” he predicted. Demon placated, his face went back to the handsome human usually in charge.

Buffy watched Spike’s grand entrance to her town and grinned. “Such a Drama Queen,” she giggled. “Well, things are about to get interesting.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapter Note: I had trouble starting this chapter for reasons that eluded me for quite a while. I sat back and thought about the bigger picture and not just my desire to see Buffy and Spike finally interacting. The whole purpose of the spell is to elicit empathy and that means what they see is more important than gratifying my shipper’s heart.
> 
> The last chapter took us through Btvs S1 and I was trying to jump right to season 2 when their long journey started for them. That was my stumbling block and I finally realized it was because I was skipping a needed step. 
> 
> After Buffy’s first death she went to LA with her dad. When she came back (S2) she was quite a bit different. She had lost a lot of her young innocence for one thing. The first episode showed her to be quite brutal and cold towards her friends and Giles for that matter. Yes, dying had a strong impact but there had to be more, had to be choices made, decisions reached, that caused her change and THAT was where I needed to start this chapter. Yes, I know that this delays them meeting up in School Hard but it is NECESSARY, not me coming up with filler or procrastinating. This chapter is constructed as it is for a reason, the reason serves the bigger plot.
> 
> Another thing I noted about Buffy after her first death is that her Slayer skills seemed to improve quite a bit. I am chalking it up to my theory that with each death and return the Slayer parts of her grew stronger. From episode 1 of season 2 we see her fighting skills and instincts far exceed any training she’s had to that point. It had to come from somewhere.
> 
> Small bits from the first two episodes of Season 2 will show up in this chapter. When She Was Bad was written by Joss Whedon and Some Assembly Required was written by Ty King. There is also a toe in the water for School Hard written by Joss Whedon and David Greenwalt.
> 
> And… the more you know:
> 
> The emotional fallout of Child Soldiers https://carrcenter.hks.harvard.edu/files/cchr/files/dalessandra_pshychol_cons_of_childsoldiers.pdf 
> 
> (Hate the source as it’s Russian TV and not known for being balanced but the documentary is good and nothing glaringly false) Child soldiers in Syria https://youtu.be/_6Evdwg9-dw And kids in Sierra Leone Africa from Turkish TV https://youtu.be/bUeE12vXDs0 
> 
> Emotional avoidance as a coping mechanism for PTSD https://www.verywellmind.com/ptsd-and-emotional-avoidance-2797640
> 
> Support available https://www.helpguide.org/articles/ptsd-trauma/coping-with-emotional-and-psychological-trauma.htm 
> 
> Children as pawns in divorce https://www.mentalhelp.net/blogs/the-politics-of-divorce-when-children-become-pawns/ 
> 
> Effects of divorce on the kids https://www.survivedivorce.com/divorce-effects-children


	53. Chapter 53

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [](https://imgur.com/i4l0ZK1)   
> 

Chapter 53

[](https://imgur.com/uwG3VQu)

 

Buffy was doing the dance of the seven veils without the veils or asking for a prophet’s head as payment.

 

‘Whoa! Lolita much? When did I start with the skank-in-a-tank look? I can see why Angel lurked around in the shadows back then. Probably saw me like that Hubert Humphrey guy in the pedo book. Figured I was the seductress and all.”

 

Buffy watched herself dance as she shadowed her Spike. He for his part was riveted to her younger self. ‘Forgot I still had that baby fat. Chubby cheeks Buffy. But, hey, bigger boobs.’

 

As Spike circled the dance floor of the Bronze his eyes glued to young Buffy, her ghostly self looked around. She’d been focused on the beat and the heat back then and hadn’t even noticed the hottie in black stalking her.

 

‘Hey! How’d he get over there? Huh? There’s two of them. When did we get a surplus Spike?’

 

[](https://imgur.com/fj7GvwL)

 

‘Damn but she’s physical poetry whether she’s dancin’ or fightin’. No wonder I was a goner from the start. ‘Course, twit that I was back then I thought it was all about predator and prey. Shoulda known better from the start. Never got a cockstand scopin’ out a kill before.’

 

He watched her as she shimmied and writhed against this one and that one and bit back on the jealousy. ‘Shoulda put my hands on those hips and shown her a real dance instead of thinkin’ about suitable scary first words. Mighta lit a different fire in the girl if I’d had more sense back then.’

 

He sighed deeply and tilted his head, expression beyond fond. “I do love nothing in the world so well as you. Is not that strange?” A besotted smile and awe-filled gaze followed her every move, as focused as his younger self had been, though more aware of the true emotions at play. 

“So fair art thou, my bonnie lass, 

So deep in luve am I;

And I will luve thee still, my dear,

Till a’ the seas gang dry.”

[](https://imgur.com/AidHJYw)

 

“You always go wandering around spouting poetry ‘cause I don’t remember you saying that or anything like it? I seem to recall, “I kill you,” after making a date for the next Saturday. “

 

Ghostly Spike’s back stiffened but he didn’t turn around. His eyes were still on the dancing Buffy but his ears clearly heard her directly behind him.

 

“Got any idea why there’s two of both of us?”

 

“Buffy?” He still didn’t turn. “Would I be wrong to guess you’re a bit older and less fancy-free, maybe bit more self-righteous than the dancin’ version?”

 

Ghostly Buffy laughed. “Got it in one. Hey! Wonder if my hand would pass through you if we tried to touch?”

 

Spike turned and blinked. “Could try. Been a long while since I tried touchin’ anyone.”

 

“You! Try since about 1860.”

 

“So, Red’s magic sucked you into this strange voyeuristic romp too?”

 

“I’ve closed my eyes,” Buffy protested. “Wait… how long have you been spying on my life all invisible and sneaky.”

 

“Not like I asked for it,” Spike defended. “You used to know. Polar bear named Charlie ring any bells?”

 

“OH MY GOD! That was you?”

 

“In the … well, not actually flesh but whatever this is.”

 

“How long?”

 

“First laid eyes on you in the nursery of the hospital. Cute little bundle you were too.” Spike smiled at her in fondness. “You?”

 

“Saw you the day your little sister Alma got sick, before she died.” Buffy bit her bottom lip remembering the sad, grief-stricken boy. “I’m really sorry that happened. You were a good brother.”

 

Both of them stared at the other in silence as they let the implications and questions simmer.

 

“So, know all my dark uglies then?”

 

“And you know mine too I guess.”

 

Spike snorted. “You don’t have any, pet. Must really hate me now that you’ve seen it all.”

 

Buffy blinked back tears as Spike seemed to withdraw more into himself. “Not really. I can’t say I loved watching the killing and… other... stuff but I think I understand the why’s”

 

“Cause I’m a vampire? A demon? A monster?”

 

“Part of it’s because of the demon and vampire thing but you aren’t a monster. There’s still a lot of man in there and even the demon has some good qualities.”

 

Spike was shocked silent.

 

“Wow! Don’t remember ever getting you to shut up,” she laughed. “Who knew a bit of understanding and acceptance would disarm the big scary vamp.”

 

Spike grinned, “Think I’m big and scary then do you?”

 

“Not so much now after having time to pay attention and think. Sorry to disappoint. Oh, you’re fierce enough and there’s nothing fluffy about you but you’re more than the hype.”

 

Spike laughed at that. “So are you, luv, so are you.”

 

They both looked at their more solid selves and watched the beginning of their peculiar dance. 

 

“Can’t believe I didn’t sense you back then. You were circling like a shark!”

 

“More like moth to a flame. Was drawn from the start.”

 

“Whatever happened to a box of chocolates? What was that about the whole ‘kill you’ threat?”

 

Spike smirked. “Well, had to have some reason to see you again, didn’t I? Somethin’ acceptable to the Big Bad I was insistin’ on bein’. Couldn’t even wait till Saturday though. From the first look, I was single-minded. Like a kid at Christmas seein’ all the goodies or a starvin’ man at a buffet I suppose.” Spike figured since she’d seen it all there was no reason to even try to pretend, putting on armor that wasn’t going to work any longer. “Didn’t understand it then but just bein’ near you woke somethin’ in me. Fought it hard, but was there from the first.” 

 

Buffy blushed slightly. Even with all her insights and years of processing she hadn’t really thought that Spike might be attracted to her. She found she liked that more than a little. ‘Probably a good thing since I’m already pretty well in love with him.’

 

Maybe if she fessed up at least a little he’d clue her in to where they might be heading once they got back to their own real world. “To be honest, I was interested from the start. Felt shivers, thought it was fear but I didn’t want to admit any fear of a vampire. It wasn’t really fear, I guess. Something tingled near you, made it exciting going up against you verbally or physically.”

 

Spike looked shocked. “That so?” If his heart could beat it would be hammering it’s way out of his chest about now. ‘That mean I stand a chance?’

 

The awkwardness of the moment hit them both at the same time. 

 

“Wonder why I wasn’t there when you were born since you were always there in my life?”

 

Spike thought about it a bit. Wrestled with all the ramifications of whatever this spell was intended to do, all it had done. “Maybe because William was just a typical upper-class Victorian lad until the time you popped in. No deep dramas or losses. You, poor lamb, came into the world with things already topsy-turvy with your folks and all.”

 

“So was it weird for you, too, feeling me there?”

 

“Didn’t feel you at all, luv, not till I clawed my way out of the grave.”

 

Once more they both withdrew deep into thought.

 

“Maybe I knew you were there because I was a Potential Slayer right from the start and you were just a human boy like all the other humans who couldn’t see me?”

 

Spike nodded. “Makes sense. Once I rose I had the demon in me. Demon’s mystical like the essence that makes you a Slayer. Felt you from then on though. Didn’t know just what I was feeling but knew it was a being, someone real. Thought it was an angel for a long time.” He smiled at her and teased, “least I didn’t mistake you for some fuzzy animal!”

 

“I could see you when I was really little. I remember now. The white hair and fangs. Mom’s the one who decided you were some imaginary bear.” She whispered, “Didn’t you ever see me? Dru did… does.” She sounded a bit sad.

 

Spike raised a brow. “‘Splains a lot there. Lots of things she’s said over the years make sense now. Her wantin’ me to off you so insistently when we got here for one.”

 

“She does love you, as much as she can.”

 

“I know.” Spike lifted his eyes to the ceiling. “Maybe not fair of me to want more. Poor wounded bird gives all she can, not right to expect more.”

 

“There’s nothing wrong with wanting… needing to be loved the way you should be. To come first. Angelus made it impossible for Dru to ever feel that towards you. It’s tragic really but not your fault or hers. There’s no reason for you to feel guilty. You’ve been good to her always.” Buffy reached a hand and thrilled when she felt flesh under her fingers.

 

Spike practically purred in pleasure both at her words and the touch.

 

“So Dru … why do you think she sees you and I just sensed you?”

 

“I’ve got a theory. I think that Dru might have been a Potential Slayer before Angelus turned her,” Buffy shared. “Maybe being a seer, having a demon and the Slayer essence gave her the ability to see what you could only feel?”

 

“You just come up with that?”

 

“No, I thought about it a lot over the decades. I’ve never met any Potential Slayers but she seems to have a lot of signs.”

 

Buffy watched as her younger self rushed for the door having been lured by younger Spike’s trick. 

 

“Wow, I really was oblivious, wasn’t I?” Buffy looked a bit crestfallen. “Giles was always after me to hone my senses. Guess I was defective.”

 

Spike was pissed off on her behalf. ‘As if there was anything less than perfection in her.’

 

“Buffy, think about it. When did I start hangin’ about?”

 

“Well, you said just after I was born.”

 

“Think you might be used to me then, don’t you?”

 

Buffy’s mouth dropped open. “That’s it! I’m not all faulty towers girl… my tinglies didn’t work ‘cause they were always going off with you right there!” She felt like joining in the dancing herself. All this time she thought there was something lacking in her but instead it was just that she’d had her own personal vampire companion every moment of her life! 

 

Their younger versions played out their proscribed roles with threats and promises before parting ways. Buffy walking off and Spike fading back into the darker shadows of the alley.

 

“Spike,” the now nearly giddy Ghostly Buffy turned to reach for her new companion only to find him gone. 

 

“Huh?”

 

*** 

[](https://imgur.com/fj7GvwL)

 

Sike felt himself being torn from his fellow shade as he diligently trailed ‘his’ Buffy. Watching her talking to the others about their first encounter deeply shamed him. He’d frightened the girl, a girl that he would now die rather than see harmed. 

 

‘Suppose the other Buffy’s off followin’ my nastier self,’ Spike shuddered and tried to remember just what she’d be witnessing. He remembered being focused on studying her moves, telling himself and everyone else that he was preparing to end her life. ‘Just my luck to be in a good place with her now only to have her reminded ‘bout what a monster I can be.’

 

Spike listened as Giles tried to reassure Buffy about this new vampire and redirect her concern to the upcoming St. Vigeous day dangers. “Well, he can’t be any worse than any other creature you’ve faced.”

 

Enter the Poof. ‘Of course he’d pop up about now.’

 

“He’s worse. Once he starts something he doesn’t stop until everything in his path is dead.”

 

Xander nervously tried to lighten the mood, “So, he’s thorough. Goal-oriented.”

 

“That’s my grand-sire… everything he sees is just a reflection of himself. Stopped plenty of times. Always had free will and used it. He’s the bastard that leaves a path of destruction in his wake with or without a soul.”

 

*** 

[](https://imgur.com/AidHJYw)

 

Both the non-corporeal beings were vastly relieved to see each other again as Spike crashed the parent-teacher night and they had their first real dance.

 

“Seems like we’re together when our other selves are and back to trailing our own Buffy and Spike when apart.” Buffy found herself hoping that her memories of many encounters were accurate. She loved being with the Spike from her timeline. They had so much to talk about and so little time it seemed.

 

“Not sure how this bit of magic works. Guess we’ll figure it out as we go along.”

 

“Plus if it is because of something Willow did, it might not work the way it was supposed to work either. She’s kind of unpredictable.”

 

Spike shivered. “Magic is always dangerous even in the hands of a seasoned practitioner who uses caution. Always consequences. Just look at that poor bloke, Barnabus! Decent enough fella with a good life till he pissed off a witch, lost it all even the love of his life. Cursed instead of gettin’ properly sired too. Bloody tragic. No good comes from magic.”

 

Buffy stared, blinked then broke out in giggles. “You got this whole fear of magic from a TV Soap? You DO know it’s fiction, right?”

 

Spike rolled his eyes. “Course I do. I’m an educated man, saw that yourself. Those professors would say demons are a myth … unless it’s a professor of theology then they’d say we’re fallen angels. I have yet to meet one that was anything like any sort of angel except maybe a Loxnor with those leathery wings and flamin’ eyes. Hell, even Angel wasn’t an angel and all of ‘em would say vampires are myths or metaphors for repressed sexuality. Nothin’ repressed here, bleedin’ know-nothings.”

 

Buffy lost her battle and could no longer hold back the deep guffaws as she watched Spike pace and rant. “Stop! Stop! Spike… focus!!”

 

“Right then. Point is, in fiction or fact magic is a nasty thing to toy with.”

 

“Well, I can’t argue with that.” 

 

The battle between their other-selves was at the climax as Joyce loomed over the fallen vampire ready to protect her child.

 

“So,” she glanced at younger Spike’s prone form as Joyce raised her ax. “Why did you let mom stop you? You could have pulled that ax from mom’s hands easy-peasy.”

 

Spike smiled shyly. “Loved her fire for one thing but loved dancin’ with you more. Way too soon to have it all end.” 

 

Buffy wasn’t surprised this time when Ghostly Spike disappeared. She followed the other one as he fled into the night. ‘See you soon. Hope so anyway. Hope we have at least that much of this magic thingy figured out at least.’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And so they meet. From here on I’ll try to not neglect the visual clue about just who we’re watching. Spike is still following Buffy’s life and vice/versa but when the two are together in the flesh the future shades can see, speak and connect. Hope that much was clear. 
> 
> Tiny bit of dialogue from School Hard written by Joss Wheden and David Greenwalt
> 
> Ghostly Spikes words on seeing Buffy dancing is a quote from Benedick’s line in Act4, Scene 1 of Much Ado About Nothing
> 
> He followed that up with a verse from Robert Burns (A Red, Red, Rose)
> 
> https://www.poetryfoundation.org/poems/43812/a-red-red-rose
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dance_of_the_Seven_Veils 
> 
> School Hard promo https://youtu.be/Pzi3JxDgI6Q 
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lolita 
> 
> Humbert Humbert first sees Lolita https://youtu.be/mVDwq96rY5w 
> 
> Angel sees Buffy at Hemery https://youtu.be/6lT3AOEe7Fk 
> 
> Hubert Humphrey, NOT a pedophile https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hubert_Humphrey 
> 
> Humbert Humbert, definitely a pedophile https://villains.fandom.com/wiki/Humbert_Humbert 
> 
> Fawlty Towers https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fawlty_Towers and a clip https://youtu.be/N1qAF8VAgVA 
> 
> Dark Shadows, the rise of Barnabus https://youtu.be/vgBMZOHZVLo 
> 
> Angelique curses Barnabus https://youtu.be/hzVhGxMsupM


	54. Chapter 54

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [](https://imgur.com/ThpLgJQ)

Chapter 54

[](https://imgur.com/uwG3VQu)

Buffy felt a bit of pride at how banged up Spike appeared. She wasn’t arrogant enough to think she’d bested him in their first fight, but she’d been a challenge at least and had won his respect.

“Did she ‘urt you?” Dru looked over his wounds. She seemed more avid about the blood on him than concerned about his injuries.

“I was so close baby but…,” Spike laid his head on Dru’s chest seeking comfort. “A Slayer with family and friends! That sure wasn’t in the brochure.”

Buffy smiled fondly. ‘True. All the Slayers he’s fought, even the good ones, didn’t really have any backup. He could have ended me right there the first time if I hadn’t had my mom and friends to protect. It made me have to get creative. Couldn’t give up. Mom was brave too.’

Spike nuzzled into Dru’s petting hand and sighed happily. “How’s the Annoying One?”

Dru frowned, “‘e doesn’t want to play.” She’d thought the child would like her games but the demon in the small size was having none of it or of Dru. He looked at her as if she were damaged goods and only worth remaining undusty to placate the warrior vamp at her side with the reputation for killing Slayers. The boy had no respect for Dru’s own reputation.

“Suppose I’d better go make nice.” The more Spike watched all the minions groveling and sniveling the more he was irritated. Not one of them had the stones to go up against the Slayer themselves mano y mano. They were putting all their chips on some mystical juju and worshiping a long-dead vamp turned into evil-saint mythology. ‘Doesn’t occur to the lame brains this Vigeous bloke is dust. No power there.’

The boy looked at him hopefully, then with disdain as he took in Spike’s demeanor. “You failed.”

“Yeah, I… offer penance.”

“Penance? You should lay down your life! Our numbers are depleted. The feast of St. Vigeous has been ruined by your impatience. Should I forgive you?”

Spike hid a sneer. This upstart thought he was all that and a bag of crisps. Had his minions do everything for him while he sat on his arse like royalty. ‘Acts kinda inbred too.’

“I was rash. If I had to do it all over again…,” he grinned wickedly, finished with the playacting. “Ah… who am I kidding? I’d do it exactly the same, only I’d do this first.”

In a blink, Spike hoisted the demon-in-a-child’s-guise, shoved him in a cage and slammed it shut.

Spike didn’t even turn to fend off any would-be defenders, easily eliminating any standing in his way. Moving with lethal grace he raised the cage to the high ceiling and the waiting sunlight that bathed the area. “From now on, we’re gonna have a little less ritual and a lot more fun around here.”

The would-be vampire Big Bad… royalty… pope… whatever… sizzled and screamed as his minions scattered in terrified horror.

Spike took Dru by the hand and casually headed to their quarters. “Let’s see what’s on the telly.”

“Wow … I always assumed Angel got rid of the little monster.” Buffy thought back and remembered that Angel had never made the claim for the kill once everyone knew the Anointed One was dust, but he also had never denied it.

“Gotta say, Spike does know how to make a lasting first impression.”

*** 

“So tell me all about this Slayer,” Spike had sussed out the more intelligent of the minions and elevated one to be his right hand dealing with the important stuff.

Dalton blinked nervously. This new Master was dangerous and unpredictable. He really didn’t want to provoke his anger. “Your pardon Master, but I’ve only rumors and second-hand stories to go on. As you’ve seen, I’m not much of a fighter.”

Spike had the feeling the bookish vampire was still a good bit human, similar to Sam in many ways… less the balls, that is. Still, he didn’t fault the wee bugger. Not everyone liked the fists and fangs and he did have his uses, something to bring to the table. Might even help find the final cure for Drusilla. 

This Dalton seemed to prefer packaged meals and his books, loved research in fact. Just what Spike needed at the moment. Spike could do fighting on his own and couldn’t care less how the others got their meals as long as they performed their duties otherwise without mucking things up for him and his Princess.

Spike rather thought that William might have gone the same route as Dalton and Sam had he not been incubated in the crucible designed by Angelus and Darla.

“Gimme those then and your opinion of their worth.” He turned to the room filled with quaking minions and gave them their orders as well. “The rest of you watch and report. Do NOT engage. The Slayer’s mine, got that?”

Buffy smiled, ‘Yeah, I might just be at that. Not planning to tell you at this point though.’

*** 

Buffy laughed in delight. “Spike! You are a sneaky sneaker who sneaks!” Her tone of voice spoke of admiration. “Good thing my vamp-dar was wonky or I’d have sensed the idiots you had spying on me.

“It does explain how you knew how to counter my moves right from the start though. I shouldn’t be surprised. You always did study the Slayer before you took them on. I guess with Dru taking up most of your time sending minions to do the leg work makes sense.”

Everyone had always underestimated Spike. They seemed to ignore the intelligence he’d clearly needed to survive over a century not to mention keeping Dru undusty at the same time. It wasn’t just her or Giles but the whole gang who’d made that mistake. Buffy had seen it as far back as William’s human days. Be he William or Spike, others just never caught on to how clever, insightful, and flat-out intelligent he truly was.

Naturally, he used this to his advantage.

“Works for me too. If Giles thinks I’m an airhead, then I don’t get stuck with all the research and study.” Yet another trait they shared.

His team was good, she gave them that. Of course, they had to be. Spike didn’t permit half-arsed measures when it came to important stuff. He could be pretty scary when crossed or if taken advantage of.

He got back nightly reports and had built up a small video library of the Slayer in action. He watched those every moment possible studying her moves, tendencies, and weaknesses. ‘Okay, Giles was right… I do drop that shoulder and leave myself open. But not always!”

To Buffy’s surprise, more than once Spike did more than study her skills and take notes. “Oh you naughty, naughty, vampire you,” she blushed and giggled as she watched him pleasure himself as if watching porn. “Think I may have to tease you about this little nugget when we run into each other again. Way too much fun not to.”

Most of Spike’s time was spent with Dalton going through book after book as well as ancient scrolls and even computer searches. ‘Who knew Spike could web-surf?’

Somewhere there’d be a clue. Something to bring Dru back to her strength. Face it, she’d never be truly healthy… Angelus had seen to that before human William was out of the nursery wing!

Dalton was a timid mouse of a vampire but an excellent scholar. He worked well with Spike. They still weren’t close to the cure that Buffy remembered but on the right track at least.

*** 

[](https://imgur.com/fj7GvwL)

‘I know the Slayer loves the git but that boy just annoys me somethin’ fierce. Don’t know why she puts up with his pettiness and jealousy. She told him she isn’t interested but he’s as possessive as Angel.’

Xander was nearly green about the exchange student scheduled for Buffy’s home. Once he’d heard it was a male, he suddenly began hurling warnings and the like that just screamed envy.

The museum exhibit was a bit of alright. The poor wee lass in the tomb saddened Spike. It reminded him more than a bit of a Slayer’s lot. “Put the power all in one gender’s hand and the other was poorly treated. Just like the Watcher Wankkers, those Inca priests had no problem sacrificing some poor chit, sayin’ it was a sacred duty and whatall. What kind of deity asks for somethin’ like that?”

Spike felt his memories go back to his nursery days and Nanny Fergus. The old Biddy had a unique means of punishment for naughty boys. Mild childhood infractions led to the command to memorize and recite a Bible verse. He remembered one time picking the shortest verse in the Bible to accommodate her order. He’d smugly recited,”Jesus wept.” and felt proud of his having found this loophole. He hadn’t sat comfortably for a few days after that and never tried looking for the shortest ones again.

Lots of those memorized passages were still deeply engraved on his brain. He’d never been a bad child but Nanny had been quite a stickler even for a Victorian! This whole situation with the sacrificed girl brought Psalm 50 to his mind and if the Ultimate Power felt this way about bulls and sheep, how much more about some wee bit of a chit? He let the words flow in his memory: 

“I have no need of a bull from your stall  
Or of goats from your pens,  
For every animal of the forest is mine,  
And the cattle on a thousand hills.  
I know every bird in the mountains,   
And the insects in the fields are mine.  
If I were hungry I would not tell you,  
For the world is mine, and all that is in it.  
Do I eat the flesh of bulls  
Or drink the blood of goats?”

“Even while the old Hebrews were burnin’ up flocks and the like, they were singin’ these words and payin’ ‘em no mind. Says right there that wasn’t what He wanted. Didn’t need any barbeque. Didn’t need some poor dried up child either.”

“Like a Slayer she was. Died too soon and painfully all to act out a role for the good of others. She got no say in it,” he spat in disgust.

‘Killed my share of Slayers, but was in fair combat and only fought those who could have done me just as easy.’

*** 

Xander’s whole attitude about the cultural exchange sitch did a 180 as soon as Ampata Gutierrez turned out to be a cute girl who inexplicably took a liking to him, even his groan-worthy jokes.

‘Somethin’ off with the girl.’ Spike was hoping that Buffy would dig a bit into the girl’s bags, find out why something felt wrong. “Not just her tragic taste in boys raisin’ that red flag either. Just goin’ by Harris’ short datin’ history I’d suspect another bug demon or the like.”

Buffy, however, didn’t have a suspicious nature when it came to her friends at least.

*** 

“Clueless, insensitive, Bugger.” Spike was irritated on Willow’s behalf. ‘Poor girl is all wet-knickered for her best friend and he’s oblivious even after the flirtin’ they were playin’ at.’ Buffy saw them making googly-eyes and teasing each other with ice cream when she got back from L.A. “Seems like the boy had to know Red was interested in more than playin’ Legos considerin’ he’d tried a taste last summer. Got the girl’s hopes up.”

Spike hated the devastated look on Willow’s face as she overheard Xander’s dismissive words about her as anything more than a friend. Spike knew that kind of pain all too well. “Course, the girl has insecurities! Even her supposed best friend, one who knew her best, diminished what she has to offer.”

Xander was too excited at the thought of having a real girl agree to go with him to a dance. He didn’t even spare a glance at his loyal friend who was unaccountably besotted with him.

*** 

Buffy didn’t go to the dance. ‘Shame, that. My Slayer loves a party and movin’ to the music.’

True, Giles wasn’t thrilled when she’d said she wanted the night off to go but he’d agreed in the end. Buffy still didn’t go, though. ‘Musta thought Peaches would pop out of the shadows and take her. Lucky for her he’d never want to go to a dance. Has all the natural rhythm and grace of a wounded Rino. Not gonna let her see that! Ruin that manly image not to mention his ruddy hair-do.”

The thing was that Buffy hadn’t even had a chance to invite Angel. He’d been missing ever since he’d proven less than useless during Spike’s grand entrance.

‘Like as not off brooding about Dru and me bein’ in town and what dirty little secrets we might spill.’

Whatever the reason, Angel had been as much a ghost as Spike only Angel’s lack of presence was by choice and total.

‘So, his girl doesn’t get to go to the fun party bein’ all loyal-like.’ Angel knew her well enough to know that she was firmly on his hook. There’d be no Owen in the wings or other boy to move on his ‘property’. She’d stay home pining for him or, if she did go for some fun, be safely in the friend-zone of Scooby-land. Either way, the old man’s claim on the girl was safe.

*** 

Buffy followed her instincts and sussed out that all was FAR from kosher with Ampata. The girl makin’ eyes and tongue with Harris was the luckless lass the Inca’s condemned ages before. ‘Tragic really. Finally got a chance to live again and wasted it on Xander Harris! That bloke is a bloody demon magnet just like Red said. Though this time it wasn’t exactly a demon. Mummy’s more a Hollywood monster, I suppose. Anyway, not the kind of girl you bring home to mother.’

Spike hoped the mummy girl would finally find some peace and rest now that she was the dust that age brings to all the dead in time. At least she no longer had to be hearing life go on around her without being able to see or taste any of it. “Better a vampire than a mummy,” he concluded.

*** 

“You dreamed about Angel again?” Willow’s expression was dreamy. Clearly she was wanting to live vicariously through Buffy’s experiences.

Buffy sighed, “Third night in a row.”

“Was it one of those vivid dreams where you could feel his lips and smell his hair?”

Spike made a gagging noise. “Eau de Brylcreem. NOT something any girl would find appealin’”

“I’m just thinking about him so much lately.”

“That’s just what he’s wantin’, Buffy. Holdin’ back and makin’ you want him all the more. Makin’ you do the chasin’.”

“Well you guys are so right for each other, except for the…”

“Vampire thing?”

“‘S not the demon that’s the problem, pet.”

“That doesn’t make him a bad person necessarily,” Willow grinned.

“Got that right, Red. Bein’ a bad person’s what makes him a bad person.”

Willow was continuing to encourage the disaster that was fated to be Buffy’s first serious relationship. “You should ask him for coffee some night.”

“Feels like watchin’ the launch of the Titanic,” Spike shook his head. 

*** 

Spike glared at the wanker with the lascivious expression eyeing his Slayer. It was one thing for the bloody bitch, Cordelia Chase, to be cozying up to the pair of older boys but she was dragging Spike’s Buffy into it too. For the first time Spike was glad that Buffy was invested in a relationship with Angel. ‘Keep her a bit safe from bounders like that.’

Looked like Buffy was fated for heartache from the males around her one way or another. Spike could see that she was a bit tempted by the college lout’s invitation.

*** 

“Ponce has good timing. Showin’ up right when your girl’s gettin’ a bit impatient. Time to toss out another come-on. Make her wiggle a bit on the line.”

Patrol had been routine until Buffy found the bracelet with the barely there bit of blood. Angel zeroed in on the blood immediately, of course.

“I was just thinking, wouldn’t it be funny to see each other some time when it wasn’t a blood thing?” She shot a shy glance at Angel gauging how her hint was working. It wasn’t. Angel was clueless. “Not funny like in ha-ha.”

Finally, Angel bought a vowel. “What are you saying, you want to have a … date?”

“That’s right, make Buffy do the askin’. Make her think she’s the one in control.”

“Who said date? I never said date.” Buffy looked embarrassed. It might be the 90s but girls still weren’t supposed to be the ones asking the guy out. Her mom would be horrified!

“Right... you just want to have coffee or something.” Angel scoffed. “I knew this would happen,” he put on a somber look as he coyly pretended things weren’t playing out just as he had hoped… just as his method had always worked over and over when luring prey in the past.

“You’re sixteen-years-old. I’m two hundred and forty-one. You don’t know what you’re doing. You don’t know what you want.”

Spike narrowed his eyes. What a perfect choice of ‘arguments’ to guarantee a young girl will play your game! ‘Imply she’s a child, make her want to prove how grown-up she is by doin’ just what you want.’

“Listen, if we date you and I both know one thing is going to lead to another,” he continued to issue sly challenges to her inexperience.

“One thing’s already led to another. It’s a little late to be giving me a warning.”

Angel looked at her, trying to come across as the mature, wise, adult. “I’m just trying to protect you. This could get out of control.”

‘Not if you’re the mature man you want her to think you are, you twat! You don’t know where the brakes are? Can’t hold off takin’ it that far till she’s legal? Yeah, no control. That’s the Angelus I know far too well.’

“This isn’t some Fairy Tale. When I kiss you, you don’t wake up from a deep sleep and live happily ever after.”

“No one does you Berk. Nice use of the Fairy Tale to remind her you’re callin’ her a little girl,” Spike snarled.

“No. When you kiss me I want to die.”

Spike was speechless. “Buffy... Buffy… Buffy… that’s not love! That’s not even lust. Not sure what that feelin’ is but it should be a big flashin’ red light.”

*** 

Buffy opted for ‘one from column B’ and accepted the invitation to join Cordy at the Fraternity House much to Willows confusion and consternation.

“What happened with Angel?”

“Nothing. As usual, a whole lot of nothing with Angel. The guy hardly ever says two words to me.” Buffy looked forlorn. “And he treats me like a child.”

‘Oh, Slayer, if you only knew how well he’s played you.’

*** 

Spike felt helpless as he watched Buffy in all her innocence being led like a lamb to the slaughter. In this case it was intended to be literal and not just the dangers to a young girl’s virtue either. The bastards looked at his beautiful, brave, loving, girl and thought to feed her to a snake demon! 

‘Really hope these bastards are still around once this spell is over. I’ll feed their tender bits to all sorts of serpents.’

For once Spike was glad that Harris was over-interested in Buffy’s social life. ‘Not that he managed to save the day. Still, at least he was eyes and ears when the cavalry did show up.’

Spike felt sorry for the boy as the modern version of the frilly cuffed set did everything possible to humiliate the lad. Kid had it hard enough without having been done up like a cheap trollop and made the butt of their jokes. Paraded him around like the best joke ever. Wasn’t like he was volunteering for the treatment unlike the pathetic pledges they had already debased. ‘Lad’ll have to carry that memory along with all his other issues,’ he tutted.

In the end, Buffy hadn’t needed to be rescued. Spike was so proud of her level head as she broke free and saved the day. None of the three girls offered to the slithering demon were harmed physically at least, though there would likely be emotional scars for a variety of reasons. 

Angel and Giles had charged in after Buffy had neatly sliced through the unnatural serpent and subdued the greedy Gits in hoods and robes. Cordelia had greeted Angel as if he were the second coming of Christ though he’d been largely useless. ‘As usual,’ Spike noted.

“Too bad that chippy didn’t get her claws into gramps. Woulda been better for Buffy… for all of us. The old bastard deserves a brunette bitch like that. Remind him of Darla.”

One good thing that came of the whole sad experience was that the Watcher finally had to see his charge as a whole person and not merely the Slayer. He was reminded that this girl WAS a girl, just as the little Inca bint had been, and deserved the normal things in life along with her sacred duty.

“I told one lie. I had one drink…”

“And you nearly got devoured by a giant demon-snake.” Giles had seemed ready to lecture her on the dire situation she had created by her one lie. Her one attempt to just have a wee bit of fun.

“Sorry Giles.”

The Watcher sighed. “I am too. I drive you too hard because I know what you have to face. From now on, no more prodding.”

Buffy looked relieved and even hopeful.

“Just an extraordinary amount of nudging.”

“I can live with that.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N:  
> Small bits of dialogue used, paraphrased or slightly altered come from School Hard by Joss Whedon and David Greenwalt also Reptile Boy written by David Greenwalt
> 
> Psalm 50 (NIV) https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Psalm+50&version=NIV 
> 
> The idea behind the “punishment” of memorizing Bible passages came from my grandmother and how she punished my mom as a child. My mother was the one who “cleverly” chose that shortest of verses and was switched for it. 
> 
> Actual Incan mummies, the result of child sacrifice, are still being found.   
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QsKdhgYajb8&feature=youtu.be Hour long documentary or  
> A few short clips:  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4zHge8wdPTk&feature=youtu.be   
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-js1O-YrjJU&feature=youtu.be  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UYKKbhA2_fI&feature=youtu.be   
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TWczeJPPoXU&feature=youtu.be
> 
> Brylcreem ad from the 50’s https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o6F4GtyRfto&feature=youtu.be 
> 
> Fraternity hazing and humiliation
> 
> https://www.thetachi.org/hazing-includes-humiliation-abuse  
> https://www.theguardian.com/artanddesign/2018/dec/10/andrew-moisey-american-fraternity-photographer-college-behaviour
> 
> The memories of this sort of experience stay with a person  
> https://www.houstonchronicle.com/local/gray-matters/article/fraternity-hazing-haunting-memory-13227406.php 
> 
> The dark side of Frat life https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9_upNTuvvJw&feature=youtu.be


	55. Chapter 55

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [](https://imgur.com/eAZM49k)
> 
> Apologies for the delay in getting this chapter out here. Nasty flu demon won the battle just as the New Year rang in and I’m only now feeling like a survivor. This chapter is running pretty long so I will split it into two chapters covering the time of the episode ‘Halloween’ from S2. The second chapter or second part, if you choose to think of it that way, will post on Sunday to make sure this first part doesn’t get lost in a double post. It is written though. Regular weekly updates should be on track once more.

Chapter 55

[](https://imgur.com/fj7GvwL)

She was a thing of beauty and William always had loved concentrating on things of beauty. Spike was no different. The add-on of a demon hadn’t changed that one bit.

Buffy was taking on a fledge with her usual creative flair using small gourds and pumpkins to knock the demon back when she was pushed to the ground.

“Bruce Lee wasn’t the only one who knew how to use whatever’s around to win a fight,” Spike grinned as she snagged a sign advertising the pumpkin patch to impale the nitwit. 

Spike remembered watching the vid of this fight over and over and marveling every time at how confident and creative his Slayer was. He’d kept the film until Dru uncovered it in Brazil after the whole Acathla mess and made a show of destroying it in a fit of temper. 

‘Hey,’ Spike startled, ‘that didn’t look like it hit the idiot’s heart. The sign she used to stake him must have had enough of a splinter to get the job done though. Great improvisation and plenty of luck.’

It was good seeing the fight in person instead of just the vid. He’d only been able to appreciate it from the angle his minion had captured before this and it was even better from different viewpoints.

Buffy brushed off the dust and tried to tidy up as she hurried to meet her friends at the Bronze. Patrol had been a bit more lively than usual but she didn’t want to chance going home and to have her mom make her stay in. Better go a bit rumpled than miss out on a few precious moments of fun and friendship. Besides, Angel was waiting there!

***

Buffy stopped in the entryway and spotted Angel sitting with Cordy at a small table. ‘Great, just what I need. ‘Miss Vogue Perfect’ making with the moves on my guy while I look like the cover of Gardening with Greta.’

“Love your hair… it just screams street urchin,” Cordy had to point out the obvious. 

Buffy reached an involuntary hand to smooth her hair and grimaced. Angel just sat there looking like a landed fish. “You know what? I need to go…” Buffy turned and muttered, “put a bag over my head.”

Angel was a man of the world and sophisticated and would probably never want to be seen with her again if she was going to look like a chimney sweep or homeless person. 

Angel finally spoke up, “Don’t listen to her. You look fine.” His voice said the right words but there was nothing about his expression to make Buffy think he meant them. Angel was nothing if not well-bred and polite.

Buffy didn’t need a mirror to know she wasn’t at her best and didn’t feel much like sitting there with everyone being all judgy. She continued to the door while Angel merely stood there next to Cordy and let her leave.

“She looks like a radiant warrior queen you git! You had to know she just came from patrol… a patrol you didn’t do a thing to help with I might point out!” Spike glared at Angel in disgust. “This how you help the girl? Sit at the club and let bitches she’s saved a dozen times mock her? Know you’re socially stilted, Peaches, but the least you could have done was walk the girl home.”

*** 

[ ](https://imgur.com/AidHJYw)

Buffy felt like crying. She could slay the monsters but just never seemed to find the right groove when it came to Angel. She wished it had been anyone but Cordy there with him. No one else would have put the spotlight on her less than perfect look.

“Hey! I don’t remember seeing YOU again until some warehouse after the whole Halloween on the Hellmouth thing happened,” Ghost Buffy had spotted her fellow bespelled ghost walking near her younger self. “How are you here? Thought we only connected when our physical selves were near each other?”

Ghost Spike nodded towards the shadows where Buffy spotted his former self lurking and watching her walk of shame. “Predator, pet. Was around lots of times you didn’t know. Had to suss you out didn’t I?”

“Great. So you got to see me in all my shining glory too,” her shoulders slumped. She hoped Spike wouldn’t make any comments about her messy look.

“Came lookin’ for you that night ‘cause you had me enthralled. Had my minions takin’ videos of you about that time and had been watchin’ you fight. Was a bigger turn-on than any Xena episode. Couldn’t get you off my mind. You were brilliant! Came to watch you turn those moves into a different kind of dance.” He smiled sweetly. “Disappointed you didn’t stay and drive all those fellas mad with lust in there. You shine! Enough to make any male near crazed… plenty of females too for that matter.”

Buffy didn’t know if her ghostly form could blush but she felt like she was. “I didn’t feel very shiny. More like a Halloween monster out a bit early.”

“Nothin’ you could do would make you less than perfect, luv. Look a bit tousled but in case you haven’t learned, that’s hot. Would’ve driven them wild if you’d stayed. Even Peaches was gobsmacked lookin’ at you.”

“I remember that Halloween. This was the last night I could have just had a good time and relaxed but I let my bruised ego cheat me out of it. I should have stayed and danced.”

“Angel should have put that cat in her place and kept you there.”

Buffy giggled. “Funny you call Cordy a cat. That’s what she dressed up as later for Trick or Treating. She didn’t turn into her costume though. She bought hers at some other place than the rest of us did.” She thought back on the events and her run-in with Spike that was coming up and found her mind picturing other ways that night could have played out depending on the costume. “Too bad you didn’t get one of Rayne’s special costumes. Might have made the night even more interesting if you weren’t you either.”

“Who do you fancy I should be? Dread Pirate Roberts, I’m a lefty… could make the swordplay work. Maybe some Round-Table reject?” Spike smirked, “Not into costumes as a regular love, though I might make exceptions for the right girl.”

“So says the guy still trying to cos-play Billy Idol.”

“Hey! He stole MY look. Thought you’ve been watchin’ and payin’ attention.”

“Yeah, yeah… just yanking your chain. I saw.” She cocked her head and looked him up and down. “Really though… the whole black on black punk look and radioactive hairmet vibe just screams costume. Has ‘hello, I’m Spike and I’m the Big Bad’ written all over it.”

Spike ducked his head and grinned. “More like battle armor. Kinda says, ‘Don’t fuck with me’. Works in lots of ways. Still not some dress-up dolly though.”

Buffy was still appraising him. “I’m thinking you’d rock a highwayman look like in some of those romance novels my mom has all over the place.”

Spike rather fancied the idea now that she’d mentioned it. “And I’d kidnap the little lost lamb you were decked out to be? Mighta been worth it. Better, seein’ as we’re ghosties, could take a page from Noyes. You could be my Bess, very tragic and romantic.”

“Huh?”

“Poem by Alfred Noyes called ‘The Highwayman’… better than the drivel in those books you’re thinkin’ bout. All about love and sacrifice and a nice bit of a hauntin’ to top it all off.”

“So this Bess is a ghost?”

Spike shook his head. “Bess is the highwayman’s salvation, or at least tries to be. Bloke goes off the deep end when he finds out what she did. Like I said… tragic.”

Buffy pouted a bit. “Kinda tired of love stories with sad endings.”

Spike had to agree with that sentiment. Love had been less than kind to him over the century. “Well if I’d been in costume like you were it still would’ve ended with us fightin’ to a draw once that spell ended. Sad endin’ to the night kinda built-in I suppose.”

Spike looked over at the younger Buffy trudging her way home and biting back her tears. “That jealous cat was wrong you know. You looked glorious. Angel shoulda made sure you knew it.”

“Cordy always did have a kind of a thing for Angel. She wore her ‘queen bitch’ label proudly too. Guess this was a pretty good night for her at least.”

Spike considered the two beings in question and remembered seeing the cheerleader at Angel’s L.A. office when he’d gone there to get his ring back. “Peaches needs someone who can wield a whip and chair. Maybe a good thing she’s out there workin’ for him now.”

Buffy blinked and nodded in agreement. “Yeah, if anyone can tame that beast it’ll be Cordy.”

Spike was shocked. Maybe all this time following him around in the past had opened her eyes a bit where her ex was concerned. She didn’t seem nearly as googly-eyed about the old bastard as she had been before. “I kind of expected a busted nose for that. You okay slayer?”

Buffy shrugged, “I‘ve just had a lot of time to think, lots of information to process and more than a little growing up lately. Cordy is welcome to him. Just hope she keeps a stake handy just in case.”

Spike the stalker watched as dejected Buffy climbed the tree to her bedroom and closed the drapes then he pulled out a fag and lit it. ‘Time to get back before Dru gets in a tizzy for my bein’ out without bringin’ home someone pretty.’

Ghostly Spike reached out a hand and lightly touched his Buffy’s face. “Looks like we split up again, Pet. See you soon.”

Buffy blinked as he disappeared. She hoped to see him again before the coming night when she was the helpless damsel. Since he was secretly stalking her she hoped it might happen more often than her memories suggested. It was good to have someone there to talk to besides herself and, at times, Dru.

***  
[](https://imgur.com/fj7GvwL)

Spike looked at the busy school hallway and felt the loss of his ghostly companion keenly. ‘Next time Gonna try for a hug at least. Girl can’t very well stake me in the condition we’re in now after all.’

The more Spike saw of the little troll, the tinpot dictator of a principal (‘And, yeah, mixed metaphor… what of it? And what about that ‘pal’ part of principal in the mnemonic to remember the spelling? Only pal this bloke might have is Satan if you ask me.’) the more Spike regretted the missed opportunity for eating the bugger that year when he still had his fangs.

“Maybe still hunt him up when back in my body. Be worth the headache, likely throw a parade in my honor.”

Snyder had cornered all of his ‘favorite’ targets and forced them to ‘volunteer’ to play sheepdog for flocks of ankle-biters.

‘So that’s why the Slayer was out with the kiddies instead of at the Bronze,’ Spike concluded. ‘Wondered about that.’

“I’ll bet this is just one of those cleverly evil ways adults use to get us all to use birth control,” Xander reasoned. “They should just hand out condoms instead of little kids.”

Spike watched the little man strut and flex his power over the students placed in his care. ‘Why the bloody hell didn’t the Watcher use his Council contacts to castrate the bastard!’ Giles knew that Snyder had targeted Buffy, knew that the martinet was making her life far more difficult than necessary to the point that it actually was impacting her ability to be the Slayer they needed and wanted. ‘Slackin’ on his duties there,’ Spike concluded. “Then again Joyce was lettin’ the bastard step all over my girl too. Parents shouldn’t let their kids be bullied even by officials, not when it’s unwarranted.” Poor Buffy really was left all alone in her battles. ‘Needs someone to really have her back. Where it counts.’

The principal had to be in the know about the dangers in the night, especially in Sunnydale. Too many kids going missing or worse on the regular. Just like other authorities in this burg, they all had to be part of an organized coverup. “Really! Who believed that tripe about me and my minions being a gang on PCP? This wanker got a good look and wet himself. He knew.”

Spike thought back to the situation he’d stumbled into the next year when he’d come back to town and had run into some vampires working for the mayor. “Yeah, bet that one was a demon or sorcerer or the like. Slayer must have handed him his ass since there’s a different regime now.

That must be how those NAZI’s could set up their labs and demon collectin’ shop too. Demon in charge handin’ over his enemies, makin’ deals with the government and military to get a free pass for himself. Seen that more than once. Didn’t count on my girl though!” He looked at Buffy with pride. “No one like her.”

*** 

The still-evil-thank-you-very-much part of Spike smirked as he stood unseen in the ladies loo watching Buffy and Willow pour over illustrations they’d found in an old book.

They were oohing and awwing over fashions that were outdated long before Spike’s grandmother’s time.

Spike thought back to his loved Gran and the portrait of her as a young girl seated in the garden and dressed simply in a daffodil yellow frock with white lace trim and her curls peeking out from a fetching chip straw bonnet. ‘Looked like those films of the Austen novels she did. Buffy would look a treat done up that way.’

By the time Spike was part of the fashionable world, women had put aside the plainer but more sensible clothing of Gran’s era during the Regency and had gone back to torturing their bodies with hoops and bustles and ever-smaller waists created by too-tightly bound corsets that forced good posture but made simple breathing a challenge. “My Buffy looks better with easy breathing,” Spike insisted.

When Buffy and Willow had first come up with the idea of “reading up on Angel” to learn more about him, Spike had a brief moment of hope that Buffy really had read up on Angelus. No such luck though. Just like everything else she was only interested in things specific to her notions. 

Right now her notions were to imagine Angel in some Period Piece world of long dresses and impeccable manners where everything was lovely and genteel and not at all like the reality of those “old days”. ‘Would’ve helped the girl a lot more to nab the books that told her all about Angelus’ glory years with the demon runnin’ free.’ Spike wondered what her opinion of the poof was now that she’d gotten an eye-full for herself. ‘Course she got an eye-full of me on a tear too,’ he cringed.

The woman in the book the girls were pouring over dated from Liam’s time which included even more bits and bobs meant to constrict a woman’s natural body into a form dictated by the gods of fashion rather than comfort.

“So this is the kind of girl he hung around. She’s pretty coiffed.” Buffy studied the picture intently and wondered just how she could create that same look. She also wondered if the effort might be wasted completely if Angel didn’t choose Halloween to make an appearance. There was no guarantee after all. She never knew when he might turn up, or not.

“She looks like a noblewoman or something which means being beautiful was sort of her job description.” Willow bit her bottom lip and considered, “It all looks like too much trouble to me.”

“Clearly this girl was a workaholic.” Buffy sighed and looked again at the picture. “Willow, I’ll never be like this,” she sighed.

“No worries, pet. Old Liam might have had the dosh owing to his daddy dearest being’ a successful merchant and all but that’s not the sort of girl he usually fancied anyway. Want to dress in a way that one liked you gotta go below stairs or in the taverns. His eye was ever on the servants and tavern wenches, the sort without any say in the matter. The kind that would be turned out with nothing if they dared refuse.”

Willow tried to console Buffy, “She’s not that pretty. She’s got a funny waist. See how tiny it is?”

Spike looked at his Slayer and thought her waist looked perfect to him. ‘Nice handful everywhere a lucky bloke might want to touch.’ Nothin’ wrong with a corset, sexy as hell but done up like in that day, meant to cinch a waist down to nothing, it was pure torture for a woman. 

Spike looked at Buffy with sympathy. Poor chit was a bit of a romantic and her wistful look at bygone times, filtered through Satan only knew how many sanitized films and books, made her harsh life of blood and fights and pain harder than ever to bear. She looked at the girl in the picture, imagined a life of feminine comfort and grace and it made her feel even more unnatural than she did on a regular basis. Being called to be not just A warrior but THE warrior didn’t do much to bolster the girl’s womanly desires for beauty and love. ‘Chit isn’t even able to stumble through to normal sexual wakenin’ what with all the Slayer appetites runnin’ wild in her. Right mess for the girl. No wonder she fancies the fairy-tale life she’s imaginin’ the women of that time lived.’

“It must be wonderful to put on some fantastic gown and go to a ball, like a princess. To have servants and horses and yet more gowns…” Buffy’s eyes glazed over clearly lost in some Disney version of the ‘old days’.

The reality was something different though. It was a bit better in William’s day but even the Victorians a century after Liam didn’t make life easy for females, even down to the fashions. It could be appealing on the outside, but just under the surface was another thing entirely.

“Buffy, you’d change your tune the first time you needed the privy! Those hoops, bustles and bum rolls… all dependin’ on the actual year o’course… were restrictive at best and awkward at their worst. You’d be wantin’ out of ‘em inside an afternoon.” Though the crotchless knickers were a bit of alright if you asked him. Buffy needin’ someone just to help get herself dressed would be enough to send her round the bend, he’d bet money on it.

“Forget about Slayin’ too.” Spike thought back to some of the Slayers he’d watched try to do their duty swathed in enough fabric to clothe a score of females, getting tangled in skirts and flounces. “Saw how hampered those poor girls were first-hand, didn’t I? Couldn’t even bring myself to challenge most of those handicapped lasses.”

“I still think I prefer being able to vote, or will when I can,” nodded Willow. 

“You listen to red, Slayer. You’d hate the reality of it. No Disney Princess world even for a real princess. Dirt and bad smells. Cold in winter, too warm in summer. You’d miss modern baths and showers too. Women considered little more than chattel, bartered from father to husband and if the chit can’t find someone to marry them they get put in the “care” of a male relative for life. No ownership of anything for most, not even a real say where the kiddies are concerned. Some men were decent sorts like my da but the laws were stacked against women. You’d hate it.” Spike thought back not that many years ago to the plight of females and was grateful once again for having been born with a dick. “Just cause it’s an urban legend about the rule of thumb being a limit on the size of the rod allowed to beat a wife doesn’t mean beatin’ wasn’t accepted and common.”

*** 

[](https://imgur.com/uwG3VQu)

Spike was watching a vid. Buffy chuckled as she saw the star of the show was none other than Buffy the Vampire Slayer. ‘Huh, sounds like a cheesy B movie title.’

B movie or not, Spike was glued to the screen. “She’s tricky. Baby likes to play,” He grinned in approval at Buffy’s clever move taking out an idiot fledge with a sign. He paced in excited agitation too hard to sit comfortably. 

Buffy smiled fondly as she watched the clear approval on the face of the Master vampire. “Yeah, I always felt like a freak admitting it but it IS fun.” She remembered how Giles and Angel were both so somber, always making a point of reminding her that her calling was a sacred duty. Faith and Spike got it though… it was exhilarating when she just went full out while slaying.

“See that!” Spike excitedly pointed at the screen as Dru drifted into the room. “That’s what you call resourceful.” He stood up straight and ordered his minion to push the rewind button.

Dru was bored and not having a particularly good day. “Miss Edith needs her tea.” Her voice was barely a whisper. Her strength was nearly non-existent.

Spike was paying little to no attention to Dru as she wafted towards him. Her mouth in a moue of distaste. Her Knight was still hers! He wasn’t supposed to be staring at the Sunlight with desire, not yet!

“Do you love my insides? The parts you can’t see?”

Spike’s initial response was mostly by rote. “Eyeballs to entrails, my sweet.” He sensed that Dru was needy for some reason and turned his attention to her. “That’s why I have to study this Slayer. Once I know her, I can kill her and once I kill her you can have your run of Sunnyhell and get strong again.”

Dru knew better but somehow still hoped the stars would show her how to turn it all around before her visions became true. “Don’t worry. Everything is switching soon. Outsides to insides. It makes her weak,” she whispered in his ear. Maybe her Spike would remove the pesky ghosty while little men played with statues and masks.

‘Really? Did my Pet have a vision then?” He was delighted at the thought. Dru had stopped seeing her pixies and hearing the stars siren songs as her strength ebbed. Maybe she was improving a bit just being on the Hellmouth.

Dru looked at ghostBuffy and glowered. “Should ‘ave ended ‘ere,” she pouted. “Could ‘ave. Bad dogs already want their tummy rubs in the sun.”

“Huh?” Buffy noted that Spike hadn’t heard that last bit, not that he’d understand it any better than she did.

“Not for you my Spike, not now. Daddy’s girl still!”

Spike did hear that and his jaw clenched at the mention of Angelus. “Yeah, got that memo decades ago, Pet. Still, I’m all you got.”

Dru twirled and clapped her hands. “Not long now though.”

***   
[](https://imgur.com/fj7GvwL)

Spike had to admit that Buffy was lovely done up like the most perfect noblewoman he’d ever seen. The dark hair of the wig suited her every bit as well as her regular golden locks and he was hard-pressed to decide which looked better on her. Then again his Slayer was beautiful no matter the getup. The young witch, however, was a revelation.

All those fluffy jumpers, overalls, and mismatched bits and pieces did her no favors. She was truly hiding her light under a bushel! Bit of leather, bare midriff, and some makeup and she could give any of the other girls a run for their money. Have any boy she fancied along with it. It was clear that she had no confidence in her hot look, however. ‘Poor chit hasn’t learned to play the role yet.’

The doorbell rang and Buffy rushed down to let Xander in. Willow was going to knock his socks off and Buffy could hardly wait. 

“Well, well. Seems the boy does have some manners. Managed to have forgotten how to knock or ring over the years though.” Spike couldn’t remember Harris ever bothering to knock in all the time he’d known him.

Buffy had tried to set the stage for Willow’s grand entrance only to have her show herself at the top of the stairs in a sheet looking as awkward as always. Thanks to the ‘BOO” emblazoned on the front you could tell she was supposed to be a ghost and not some American southern night-rider.

“Shame, that. Willow can be a knockout and Harris would be pickin’ his tongue up off the floor if he knew. Bad as she’s been pinin’ for the boy it’s a shame she didn’t have at least that one moment to know she could shine.”

Xander glanced up and grinned at his old friend, “That’s a fine boo you have there.”

Spike snickered, “Better Boo ‘neath it she’s hidin’.”

Spike looked at the group of kiddies being shepherded by the teens and finally understood all the midget sized demons from that night. “Still say it was neat.”

He smiled as Xander gave begging tips to his lot and shook his head as Buffy’s crew displayed the toothbrushes one woman had been handing out. Part of him found the whole “trick-or-treat” scene a nice bit of fun even without the magic to come.

*** 

And the magic DID come and without warning. One minute it was all candy and pretend and the next it was violence and mayhem. 

Spike was seeing it from a different vantage point and could see just how dangerous this “neat” situation was becoming rapidly. All the little ones were running about, most had turned into genuine demons but not having proper demon instincts. Didn’t help that the terrified soldier that was Harris now had a live weapon. “Good thing Harris seems to be a crap shot,” Spike noted as Harris fired at the rampaging gangs of turned kiddies.

Willow was having no luck in explaining the situation to GI Joe either and Buffy had done a proper job of fainting right on cue. Things were descending into chaos rapidly.

Cordelia had found the group but unlike the rest was still just a human in a catsuit. ‘Lucky for her. Tabby like her would go for a lot at the next poker game if she’d turned.’

Willow had finally managed to get the small group headed for the safety of Revello drive even if they were still not understanding the situation one bit. She had also prevented ‘Sargeant Sure-Shot’ from firing into the crowd of kids too or at least kept him from trying to improve his aim.

Spike was struck with the thought that it was a good thing that Dru was so weak back then. All those children were easy prey and no doubt more than a few didn’t survive this night.

Buffy was the stereotype of the weak, simpering, girls from days gone by and of no use whatsoever. She did, however, have a strong opinion about how society was supposed to work and was horrified when Xander seemed willing to do as Willow told him.

“You would take orders from a woman? Are you feeble in some way?”

Spike giggled and raised a ghostly hand, “OH! Oh! I can answer that!”

Angel burst into the room to ‘helpfully’ announce that something was happening as if everyone else hadn’t already noticed. ‘No shit, Sherlock,’ Spike shook his head. ‘What was your first clue?’ Truly there were times his grand-sire was as thick as his forehead!

Xander handed Buffy off into Angel’s care as he concentrated on building a barrier to keep the small demons outside the house. 

“But I don’t want to go with you. I like the man with the musket.” She sized up Angel, “Do you have a musket?”

Spike grinned at the look on Angel’s face. “Yeah, pops musket don’t even have one shot, Slayer. Defective lead balls.” He snickered. “Wish I’d been there for this part! So many wasted answers, like watchin’ Jeopardy at home… no cash prizes.”

Angel was grappling with one of the bespelled older kids and was asking for a stake only to turn his game-face towards Buffy and terrify her further.

Spike ran after her as she fled the safety of her home out into the night filled with screams and gore.

“Bloody big help, Angelus! Can’t keep your demon under control in the best of times. Didn’t need to bring it out for that fight. Only managed to scare the girl.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The episode “Halloween” was written by Carl Ellsworth, bits of dialogue used or paraphrased here and there in this chapter and the next.
> 
> Note the heart ‘missage’ in Buffy’s staking in the beginning of the episode!   
> [](https://imgur.com/w6PIr4n)
> 
> The Highwayman by Alfred Noyes (put to music by Loreena McKennit, faithful use of the poem’s words as the lyric and shown in the vid) https://youtu.be/Ixi4jz0Gn4E 
> 
> Fashions of the 1700s   
> https://mentalitch.com/major-fashion-trends-and-styles-of-the-1700s/
> 
> Angel’s given birth year was 1727 so when he was 25 it would be the mid-1700s. Women’s fashions at that time retained the emphasis on a narrow, inverted conical torso, achieved with boned stays, above full skirts. Hoop skirts continued to be worn, reaching their largest size in the 1750s,, and were sometimes replaced by side-hoops, also called 'false hips', or panniers. https://fashionhistory.fitnyc.edu/1750-1759/ https://youtu.be/6fEAQj4oQ48 
> 
> Under those pretty gowns  
> http://www.mum.org/underhis.htm 
> 
> https://www.historyextra.com/period/ancient-egypt/from-loincloths-to-corsets-a-brief-history-of-underwear-with-horrible-histories-greg-jenner/
> 
> https://www.mentalfloss.com/article/51840/7-things-historical-women-wore-under-their-skirts
> 
> A short lesson on bathrooms in the ”good old days”   
> http://www.tn4me.org/sapage.cfm/sa_id/160/era_id/4/major_id/21
> 
> Regency’s (1811 - 1820) more simple styles of clothing of Williams grandmothers likely time period as seen in numerous film versions of Jane Austin’s works and a walk through here https://youtu.be/f9KLLbHyc4U 
> 
> http://www.vintagevictorian.com/costume_1810.html
> 
> Victorian-era bathroom tricks https://youtu.be/NUHeSTDv_24   
> https://www.huffpost.com/entry/how-did-victorian-women-u_b_12969780 
> 
> Bathing in the 18th century  
> https://daily.jstor.org/how-to-bathe-like-a-18th-century-queen/
> 
> A brief history of hygiene  
> https://www.historyundressed.com/2008/07/history-of-hygiene-bathing-teeth.html
> 
> Hygiene in general in the 1700s https://youtu.be/BoT3C-ae8io 
> 
> Family structure and women’s rights in the 1700s and 1800s
> 
> https://sites.udel.edu/britlitwiki/social-and-family-life-in-the-late17th-early-18th-centuries/
> 
> https://historicengland.org.uk/research/inclusive-heritage/womens-history/visible-in-stone/womens-rights/
> 
> https://www.bartleby.com/essay/The-Womens-Rights-Movement-in-England-18th-F3CXZSX73G4Z
> 
> Rule of Thumb origins, an urban legend https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rule_of_thumb 
> 
> https://www.baltimoresun.com/news/bs-xpm-1998-04-17-1998107056-story.html


	56. Chapter 56

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [](https://imgur.com/uV6SNF7)
> 
> This chapter is really a continuation of the “Halloween” episode events begun in chapter 55 that I posted very early on Saturday. **Please be sure to read that update first.** Again, some dialogue from “Halloween” written by Carl Ellsworth

Chapter 56

 

 

[ ](https://imgur.com/AidHJYw)

 

“Look at you! Shaking… terrified… alone. Lost little lamb.” Spike, in full demon face, looked at the cowering brunette version of the girl that he had never seen behave so timidly. She was terrified! “I love it.” About time the Slayer took him seriously! He was the ‘Slayer of Slayers’ after all! Past time he got proper respect from the chit.

 

The small minions had cut off the Slayer from her gang of misfit toys and Spike has having a very good day stalking her around the warehouse. The girl was whimpering and it sang to his demon the most lovely song. ‘Take my time with this one. Savor it.’ He was playing with her not going in for the kill. 

 

While vampire Spike’s attention was all on the addled Slayer, his ghostly version was watching as Angel and Xander struggled against the newly magicked minions his former self had conscripted. ‘Not even real minions and you can’t get away to save the girl you claim to love, Peaches? At least Harris is trying.’ Really! What kind of half-arsed big bad was Angel anyway? ‘Boo-hoo. This one pretend demon has my arm. How can I help the Slayer? Oh, the tragedy! The injustice! The pathos! … Pathetic, more like.’

 

Ghostly Buffy had sidled up next to him while he tsked at his grand-sire. “I was terrified. I remember. God, did I hate feeling helpless. Normal’s not all it’s cracked up to be. I hate the idea of ever being the empty-headed blonde who gets murdered before the second scene.”

 

Ghostly Spike turned toward his companion and laughed, “Like Harm?” He laughed at the concept. “You could never be an empty-headed anything, Pet. Too quick on your feet in a clinch even without those Slayer powers. You’re a strong woman, a powerhouse. Smart too.” He ducked slightly to look her straight in the eye. “Remember, I’ve been watchin’.”

 

“Well, this is more fun this time around. I’m not terrified and weak… and, hey, I’m the ghost this time! Take that Wills!”

 

“Trick or treat,” Ghostly Spike wiggled his eyebrows. “Yeah, great memory this. Nice bit of mischief. Never did find out just what caused it but it was pretty brilliant all-in-all. Even got in a good dance with the Lady of the Manor.”

 

“Old friend of Giles. The guy was into dark magic and worships Chaos. He opened a shop in town and had the costumes bespelled so that when he did his ritual everyone would turn into their costumes,” Buffy finally clued Spike in. “He’s been here in Sunnydale a few times leaving a mess every time. I think he’s got a thing for my Watcher actually.”

 

Spike snorted. “Well, well, Ole’ Rupes has a skeleton or two in his closet does he? Have to poke around a bit once this current spell spits us back out in the real world. Fun to be had.”

 

Buffy frowned, “Don’t pick on Giles, Spike. He doesn’t deserve it. He’s given you shelter.”

 

“Chained in his bathtub, pet… not exactly ‘Emily Post’s Rules of Etiquette’ there when it comes to houseguests.

 

Buffy rolled her eyes. “You’re not exactly the normal houseguest either. And, I’ll bet you’re not following any of those rules either.”

 

“Point.”

 

“So … was the costumes. Explains why your bitchy friend didn’t turn into a real fluffer I guess. Bought her literal catsuit elsewhere?”

 

“Yup.”

 

“Wonder what kind of weird it could have been if I’d picked out a different costume? Imagine me as a punk-rocker or a vampire! Those could have made some wild memories!” Buffy mused aloud.

 

“Lots of ways that night could have played out. Lots of ‘em promisin’.” he wiggled his eyebrows and bit his bottom lip imagining the mischief they could have got up to. A few less than happy possibilities also flitted through his brain. “Some might have been pretty tragic. That’s the trouble with magic, can go arse over tit’s easy.”

 

“Can you just see me as a vampire? I wonder how I would have acted?” Buffy tilted her head and smiled shyly. “Would I have been out trying to drain everyone or would I have been trying some different tricks on the Big Bad?”

 

“I’d’ve been more than happy to fill your basket, little girl,” Spike teased and gave a low growl.

 

“I’ll just bet you would,” Buffy laughed back fully enjoying the flirting. “Or maybe you’d be in costume too, like we were talking about before. Then neither of us would have been responsible if things got out of hand.” Buffy tried to imagine the many possibilities. “The Fonz and Pinky?”

 

“Naw… go classic if you’re doin’ the 50s. Danny and Sandy. Could sing as well as dance… who knows… maybe kiss when the curtain goes down.”

 

“You’ve never heard me sing,” Buffy giggled. 

 

“Willow always said I should have dressed as Xena that year.”

 

“Spike let out a burst of laughter. “‘Kay but I won’t be playin’ Gabrielle. Ares, maybe.”

 

“You know she really loved Gabrielle though,” Buffy pouted.

 

“Well suppose I could reach for my inner feminine side if I had to,” Spike shrugged. “Be worth it.”

 

“Maybe something Shakespeare?”

 

Spike shuddered. “Only if we’re talkin’ Beatrice and Benedick. None of that Romeo and Juliet claptrap. Not a romance you know… was a tragedy! Two kids all flush with hormones. Never woulda lasted if they hadn’t snuffed themselves in the end. Burn out like most first loves who don’t know a thing about each other and have nothin’ in common ‘cept bad parents.”

 

“Okay, scratch Willie.”

 

Buffy swallowed a laugh as she saw the pure lust on Spike’s face at that. She knew where his mind went.

 

Spike rolled his metaphorical tongue back into his mouth and shook his head. ‘Can do whatever you want with my willie once we’re able, pet.’

 

“Seriously, Spike, if you had decided to play dress up… what would you have picked?”

 

He gave it a bit of thought. “Suppose back then I’d go for somethin’ like some knight out of Camelot. Dru was always callin’ me her dark knight. Wonder if it’d make me act all chivalrous?”

 

Buffy nodded. “I’d bet you could pull it off.”

 

Buffy sighed then smiled shyly as she imagined a Sir William riding to her rescue. Swooping in to take the damsel to safety and fight for her honor. Suddenly she felt more than a tiny bit damselish once more. Not so much defenseless, but needy. She’d been kind of alone for a long time after all. “Hey, would you promise not to make fun of me if I ask a favor?”

 

“Kinda depends on the favor,” Spike hedged. When he saw Buffy start to shut down he felt like a complete heel and touched her jaw and turned serious. “Sure, word of honor, my lady.”

 

Buffy ducked her head and blushed lightly. “It’s been a hundred years or so for me and I can’t believe how good it feels just to feel any touch. Would you think I’m weak or weird if I asked you to just hug me for a minute or … twelve? Just to let me feel? Would you mind?”

 

Spike felt his heart melt. Would he mind? Just the thought of holding her in his arms made him liquefy. His look was soft and tender. “Be honored, luv. No shame in needin’ touch.” He drew her into an embrace that felt like the most natural thing in the world to both of them.

 

“Scientists even have studies provin’ humans … hell, even animals… need touch. Basic as food and water.”

 

The two ghostly visitors to the past stood motionless with eyes closed basking in the feel of the other as their earlier selves began a very different dance. Neither cared to watch the blows and punches as they reveled in their current, far more pleasurable physical contact.

 

Costumed Buffy was clearly back to herself. “Hi! Honey I’m home.” She began a volley of hits and kicks that took her Spike by surprise long enough for her to get the upper hand.

 

“Why didn’t you kill me?” Ghostly Buffy asked, her voice slightly muffled due to her mouth being buried in Spike’s shoulder.

 

“Don’t reckon I wanted to. ‘Sides, not sportin’ you weren’t worthy of a fight.” Spike looked deeply into her eyes willing her to understand. “What you lot don’t seem to get is that it was never about murderin’ or killin’, not where Slayers came in. Was about puttin’ myself up against the best, she who was born to end me, and comin’ out still undead. Right then you were a scared little sheltered girl… no honor in that. Sure, it was fun scarin’ you to bits. The smell of fear is intoxicatin’! But I wouldn’t have killed you then. It’s the reason Lothos was never called the Slayer of Slayers even though he was known to have killed quite a number of them. He took ‘em out when they were raw and not ready. Easy kills. My reputation was built on only takin’ on the best.”

 

“But you had me at every disadvantage while I wasn’t myself. I know Dru wanted you to kill me.”

 

Spike let out a slightly bitter snort. “Dru wondered the same thing. Came up with a reason that sounded daft at the time but now…”

 

“What was her theory?”

 

Spike squirmed not wanting to open that can of worms just yet. This Buffy was soft and yielding, downright friendly but if she had a clue about his real feelings it could all end, and badly. “Now’s not the time for that conversation. Runnin’ out of time here as I recall.”

 

“Well, I’m glad you didn’t whatever the reason.”

 

“Me too.”

 

The two shades looked at Spike now splayed on a table, his Buffy clearly having the upper hand.

 

“Could ask you the same question. You had me dead to rights there pet but let me scamper into the night.”

 

Ghostly Buffy looked at vulnerable Spike splayed on the table looking quite tasty indeed and smiled without answering. 

 

“Hey Buff! Welcome back!” Xander exclaimed in relief.

 

The two ghostly visitors to the past broke apart reluctantly and Buffy surrendered to the compulsion to follow the fleeing Spike of the past. 

 

Spike sighed. Time moved far too quickly with these encounters. 

 

He watched as Angel checked out the disheveled Buffy of his time. “You okay?”

 

“Yeah.”

 

“No thanks to YOU,” Ghostly Spike grumbled. “Worthless shite. Good thing I didn’t really want her dead for all the help you were to her.” There hadn’t been a scratch on her. 

 

*** 

 

[](https://imgur.com/uwG3VQu)

 

… Or on him. Dru had noticed. She had been less than pleased at his failure and he did get plenty of scratches that night, all from his beloved Sire. Somehow she had found the strength to punish him for his lack of success even in the midst of her weakness.

 

Ghostly Buffy watched as Dru went all hell-cat on the returned Spike as he tried to explain why he’d been bested by the Slayer once again. Her razor-sharp fingernails didn’t need great strength to lay open his delicate skin and make him bleed.

 

“You could ‘ave ended ‘er! You want to play in the sunshine not purr for mummy.”

 

“Dru, Poodle, you’re being daft.” That got him a scratch a bit too close to the eye for comfort. Spike grabbed her hand and held it away from his face with effort. “Was magic. Can’t plan when there’s magic all about. Don’t know when it’s going to end or how.”

 

“Magic’s not the reason. Reason is the girl.”

 

Spike misunderstood entirely and assumed Dru meant Buffy’s Slayer skills. “I know, Pet. I’m learnin’ how to best beat her. Each fight I learn more. She’s slippery but I’ll get the job done in good time.”

 

Dru glared at ghost Buffy, “Not in any time. Pixies see you all covered in sun and ash.”

 

“Well, your pixies must be lying to you again. Know to keep covered in the sunlight don’t I?”

 

Dru looked at him in sadness, “Don’t know ‘ow to keep your ‘eart covered though.” She put a hand over his unbeating heart, “Always follow it even to the death.”

 

***

 

[](https://imgur.com/fj7GvwL)

 

Spike watched as his grand-sire silently slipped in through Buffy’s bedroom window like most people come through their own doorway. Spike hated seeing it every time the Ponce made free with his invite that way. Usually Buffy would be asleep already and Angel would loom at the end of her bed and just watch. He might say he was just protecting Buffy but Spike figured the only danger in her bedroom would be bedbugs and Angel wasn’t doing a thing to check for them!

 

‘Just how is it she doesn’t see this as creepy? Stalking? Someone needs to explain boundaries to the girl. Doesn’t help that Red paints it as somethin’ out of a romance novel. Joyce’d do more than take an ax to him and she’d be well within her rights doin’ it.’

 

Angel made himself at home as Buffy continued her shower and bedtime ritual. Spike watched as the Berk struggled to stop himself from opening and reading the diary on Buffy’s nightstand. ‘Prob’ly proud of himself for his restraint.”

 

Buffy entered the bedroom scrubbed free of makeup and looking younger than she usually did when awake in Angel’s company. Her sleep pants and tee shirt completed the unintentional Lolita look, especially since it truly was innocent. She was clearly embarrassed having Angel see her less than fully primped. “Taa daa! Just little old twentieth-century me.”

 

She sat next to Angel on the bed causing Spike’s jaw to clench. 

 

“Are you sure you’re okay?”

 

Spike growled. “Yeah, didn’t touch her. Coulda drained her. Least I know not to take advantage of the girl.”

 

“I’ll live.”

 

Angel looked baffled or … maybe constipated. “I don’t get it Buffy. Why did you think I’d like you better dressed that way?”

 

‘Yeah, if she really knew you she’ll have worn pigtails and knee-socks and white cotton knickers under a schoolgirl uniform.’

 

“I just wanted to be a real girl for once. The kind of fancy lady you liked when you were my age.”

 

Spike wanted to hug her. ‘My poor Slayer. Don’t you know you’re a goddess? None of those brainless twits hold a candle to you. You shine like the sun and even warm a cold bastard like me.’ Spike wished her ghostly version were there so he could tell her what a ninny she was being to ever want to be other than who she was.

 

“I hated the girls back then, especially the noblewomen.”

 

Spike laughed. “Cause their daddies knew better than to let you near ‘em. Your da had the dosh and you were properly CoI but underneath you were still too much smellin’ of the bog for proper breedin’ in their eyes. Didn’t help yourself with the reputation for tuppin’ the staff either.”

 

“You did?” Buffy looked confused. Angel seemed so sophisticated! She felt sure he’d been some kind of fancy Lord or something.

 

Angel and his projected image! Spike could see how he made Buffy feel inadequate without even trying. All his “helping” her making her doubt her abilities as a Slayer since the Powers hadn’t had to send a helping hand to any other Slayer before her. His affectations and airs making the human part of her feel not up to snuff too. Buffy was having to try to figure out how to be good enough just like she had with her worthless father. She would never realize she was more than good enough already as long as this continued! No wonder she was such a conflicted mess.

 

Angel was still droning on. “They were just incredibly dull. Simpering morons the lot of them. I always wished I could meet someone,” he looked at Buffy shyly as if revealing a long-held secret, “Exciting. Interesting.”

 

“As if someone like that’d have ya,” Spike frowned. “I seem to remember you goin’ on about how many lasses you forced yourself on, the number of bastards there prob’ly were out there. Laughed ‘bout it plenty. One reason you didn’t have us spend much time in Ireland, ‘fraid you’d look into some familiar Irish eyes and they wouldn’t be smilin’.” Someone exciting and interesting had been the last thing Liam had been looking for. Someone powerless and young was the draw.

 

Spike looked at Buffy wrapped in the embrace of his grandsire and looking up at him as if he hung the moon and it made him sick especially knowing what was soon coming.

 

“Oh Buffy, I wish you really knew him. Not just Angelus but Liam. You’d know how far beneath you he always was. Hell, I’M beneath you too but at least old Willie wasn’t a complete cad.”

 

Spike cringed thinking how close they were to Angel taking her innocence and twisting her up inside, starting whatever he’d done to break the girl.

 

“Shame all I can do is watch.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Emily Post:
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Emily_Post
> 
> Etiquette book in PDF form http://www.gutenberg.org/ebooks/14314 
> 
>  
> 
> Fonz and Pinky from Happy Days https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jQv0W9HZl5w&feature=youtu.beDanny and Sandy from Grease 
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7oKPYe53h78&feature=youtu.be
> 
> Xena and Gabrielle
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y4FWyeKt6lc&feature=youtu.be
> 
> Xena and Ares
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e3GO6zgw1TY&feature=youtu.be
> 
>  
> 
> The importance of touch in mammals has been scientifically proven. https://www.evergreenpsychotherapycenter.com/importance-touch/
> 
>  
> 
> https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-mind-body-connection/201309/why-we-all-need-touch-and-be-touched
> 
>  
> 
> https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/hands_on_research
> 
>  
> 
> Why I contend Liam was Church of Ireland (CoI) not Catholic: The Penal Laws that were in force in the 1700s in Ireland made owning a business such as Liam’s father’s successful and profitable one as a linen merchant impossible if he was other than Church of Ireland or other Protestant. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Penal_Laws Even with those laws easing by the time Liam was grown it is unlikely his father (and mother) would have been Catholic or they would not have been able to have the success they were shown to have had. This would make them Irish but set apart from their Catholic neighbors socially and even apart from their British counterparts socially. http://www.irishidentity.com/stories/penal.htm
> 
>  
> 
> The Anglo-Irish https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anglo-Irish_people
> 
>  
> 
> Remember Holden’s diagnosis in Conversations with Dead People? Assuming he was headed in the right direction with that, it kind of makes sense if you think of the wounded girl, Buffy who was pretty unsure of most everything and the Slayer who knew she could kick butt of pretty much any demon or vampire… almost too confident. Maybe the mix wasn’t as clear-cut but still was there in many ways. 
> 
>  
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Inferiority_complex
> 
>  
> 
> https://www.bustle.com/p/7-signs-you-may-have-inferiority-complex-what-to-do-about-it-16982746 
> 
>  
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Superiority_complex
> 
>  
> 
> https://www.bustle.com/p/7-signs-someone-may-have-a-superiority-complex-17006240
> 
>  
> 
> And just ‘cause it’s a lovely image… Halloween Spike on the table (yum):
> 
> [](https://imgur.com/oNW5SBp)


	57. Chapter 57

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 0[](https://imgur.com/U5WtaO6)
> 
> Episode “Lie To Me” written by Joss Whedon, bits of dialogue used or twisted in this chapter and the next. Also a brief reference to a scene from “What’s My Line, Part 2” written by Joss Whedon and Marti Noxon in this chapter.
> 
> This is another “episode” that wound up needing a couple of chapters. There will be a few of those in this season of the show that can’t be condensed into one chapter as Buffy and Spike see the past from the other’s eyes and gain new insights and confirmations of their new feelings. What happened in S2 was the foundation for their view of each other initially after all so it is quite pivotal. Some understanding and re-evaluation is needed for the new place where they find themselves.

Chapter 57

 

[](https://imgur.com/fj7GvwL)

 

He could feel his sire nearby. Buffy was patrolling near the playground area of the park and Spike knew Dru was in the area. She was always drawn to places where the little ones were likely to be found. ‘Any parent lettin’ their spawn out to play in Sunnyhell a couple of hours past sundown must have a large insurance policy on the nipper and no real love for their offspring.’

 

Spike tested the invisible bond that held him to this time’s Buffy and found it stretched far enough to follow his sire’s lure.

 

Dru was talking to a young boy and trying to inch ever closer. She was talking about her own mum and what a sweet voice she had when singing her to sleep when Edith was a small girl.

 

As Spike thought back to that year of Dru’s ever-increasing weakness, he was able to notice more now than he had then. In his panic and sense of urgency back then he’d been single-minded. It had been the demon weakening in his Princess. The strong killing beast within that had made her other than the fragile, broken, human husk left by Angelus before he had turned her and given her that demon was the part dying.

 

The human remains of Miss Edith were forefront in her illness as the demon approached death. The scared and angry young girl who had loved and wanted family and God, the one who remembered lullabies and love and resented the monster who had stolen both from her and condemned her to eternal hell forever apart from the God she had served was front and center.

 

‘Should have noticed that. Too busy lookin’ for a cure and didn’t listen as I should,” he scolded himself. ‘Could have given her a bit of comfort. No God worthy of the name would ever hold Edith responsible for the things the demon had done! No family worth havin’ would reject their broken child. Maybe those days would have been easier on her if I’d noticed and said.”

 

He remembered when Dru asked to have her way with Angelus when they finally grabbed him for the healing ritual. Spike had been chuffed that for once his girl hadn’t been doting on her daddy but wanted to cause HIM pain instead. She’d poured holy water on the git and reminded him of her mum and little sis and how Angelus had torn out their throats. ‘Should’ve noted it then except was gettin’ things ready for the magic show.’

 

Demon Dru always adored her daddy, he could do no wrong. This broken wretch despised him. Demon Dru always wanted daddy to inflict pain on her or on Spike. Sickened Dru wanted a bit of pay-back for the horror and death Angelus inflicted on her loved ones and even herself. Angelus was the monster he truly had always been instead of the beloved sire and daddy her demon and madness usually saw. Spike kicked himself for not realizing the source of her pain at the time.

 

For the first time, Spike was glad that Dru’s human bits hadn’t been in control. She wasn’t strong enough, sane enough, or able to cope with the life forced on her. A soul would have finished the job begun by Angelus on Miss Edith and she would have walked into the sun without hesitation. ‘Tis the demon that keeps her going and not just by magically powering the body.’

 

Angel had shown up and shoo’d the boy away with the ever helpful, ”Run.”

 

‘Seriously? Think Dru’s the only vamp out lookin’ for an easy kill? Get the lad’s fear pheromones laying out the welcome mat and send him on his merry way so you can chat up the childe you abandoned? Soul tell you that’s a good plan?’

 

Angel had told Dru to take Spike and leave Sunnyhell. No askin’ about her condition, no warm words to family, not really even a soul-felt threat if they didn’t go.

 

‘Seems to me if I were supposedly sportin’ a white hat, I’d be tryin’ to protect the livestock from that’s left of the Whirlwind. Would at least order Dru to leave and not feed while still there instead of suggestin’ it. Maybe lay out a serious threat while you’re at it. ‘Course if you really were up to the job, you’d have staked Dru then found me for the same treatment but you didn’t do that with old Bat Face or Darla either. Guess we get a free pass on account of the family line. Sure isn’t ‘cause you care.’

 

“My dear boy’s gone all away, ‘asn’t ‘e? To ‘er.” Dru looked devastated.

 

“Who?”

 

“The girl.”

 

‘Interestin’. Dru’s never called Angel her ‘dear boy’. That was Darla’s name for him. He’d always been Angelus or daddy. I was her boy. Was she meanin’ him... or me? Did she already know Buffy’d worked her way into my heart too?’

 

Buffy had caught up to GhostlySpike and noticed the pair also. From her vantage point, it was clear that Angel knew Dru and there was an air of intimacy between the duo.

 

Dru cozied up to Angel and Spike thought they might embrace. “The Slayer. Your ‘eart stinks of ‘er.”

 

She shot a glance in the direction where Buffy watched but couldn’t hear. “Poor little thing. She ‘as no idea what’s in store.”

 

She stopped and tilted her head as if sensing Spike’s ghostly self then smiled to herself.

 

“This can’t go on, Dru. It’s gotta end.”

 

“Oh, no, my pet.” she looked straight at GhostlySpike and whispered in Angel’s ear, “This is just the beginning.”

 

*** 

 

Buffy was out of sorts. Clearly what she’d seen the night before troubled her. She’d confessed to Willow about the beautiful, fey, woman she’d seen with Angel and the two had been passing notes about it during history class.

 

GhostlySpike was still a bit out of sorts himself from Buffy’s earlier encounter with her Watcher. Giles had tried to tell Buffy about what he’d learned about Spike but Buffy didn’t seem interested in the least. ‘Chit should have been at least a bit worried about me. Acts like I’m just some nothin’ fledge not worth her bother.’

 

Xander was delighted to think Angel was in the dog house but didn’t seem to realize that didn’t mean Buffy was in the market for a new pooch. ‘Harris is like a dog chasin’ a car. Can’t stop himself but wouldn’t know what to do with it if he caught it.’

 

Buffy was clearly insecure and jealous of the pretty girl who seemed to have some history of her own with Angel.

 

‘Poor wee lamb. Men around her have been cheaters and cads… or idiots like Harris. Hank played around on Joyce and Buffy’s first boyfriend back at the old school was shaggin’ her girlfriend while she was killin’ Lothos’s gang. No wonder she expects the worst.’ Spike thought about the girl from his own time and remembered with shame how he’d taunted her about the College boy. ‘Last girl in the world who should ever worry about losin’ her fella to another but already damaged enough to never know her true worth.”

 

While Spike was thinking about all the men who had done Buffy wrong one of the worst offenders had sidled up to the kids.

 

Spike seethed. ‘Betrayin’ fuck!’ he glowered at Billy Fordham. The sight of the boy made him want to rip the kid to shreds. Draining the bastard had been too good for him.

 

Introductions had been made and Harris was green again at yet another male preferred by Buffy to himself. Plans were made for the Bronze and dancing as Spike imagined all the ways he should have tortured the berk.

 

*** 

 

Buffy spotted Angel at the bar. The Bronze was pretty full but she’d been watching for him and hoping he wouldn’t have the mysterious brunette beauty on his arm if he did show. He was alone.

 

Buffy tried to look casual as she fished for answers. Just a simple friendly question about what Angel had done the previous night, nothing accusing or invasive.

 

“I stayed in and read,” Angel hadn’t even blinked as he lied through his teeth.

 

Buffy walked off looking as if he’d punched her in her solar plexus. Cheaters were always good liars and Angel was smooth. Too bad Buffy had witnessed the truth for herself.

 

Angel had the balls to look hurt that Buffy had walked off and was less than pleased to be introduced to one of Buffy’s old crushes. He was, even more, looking like a kicked puppy when Buffy left the Bronze with Ford without a backward glance his way.

 

The walk home was an eye-opener as Buffy discovered her old friend knew all about vampires and Slayers or at least that both existed and that she was the latter.

 

Buffy was clearly relieved that she didn’t have to lie to her old friend. At her core, Buffy was as honest as Spike and lying wasn’t easy for her either. There were enough people in the dark about her secret already and it was a source of frustration for her to keep coming up with lame excuses for everything out of the ordinary.

 

Why her mom hadn’t questioned her about the blood, gore, grass, and filth on Buffy’s clothes was a question for the ages.

 

How Buffy managed to sneak out night after night and not get caught was another.

 

It seemed most of Buffy’s life was one lie after another and not having to tell more lies to Ford was a blessing.

 

***

 

“Must be ‘awkward day’. Between Red and the Watcher, don’t know who gets the prize.”

 

Willow was twitching as if something foreign was under her skin. Buffy and Ford had happily approached Willow and invited her to the cafeteria. It was clear that she wanted to be anywhere else but in their company though.

 

“Were you drinking coffee again?” Buffy teased. “‘Cause we’ve already talked about this.”

 

The laugh was so false that you couldn’t even call it a bad stage laugh. Willow looked at Ford quickly, “It makes me jumpy.” She rapidly turned her gaze from the boy and started to back away. “I… have to go… away.” She nearly ran from the two of them.

 

The next weird moment was when Buffy encountered Giles who stumbled about explaining that he had inexplicably landed a date with the hot computer teacher. And would be reachable by beeper if any … study help… was needed.

 

Buffy rushed to reassure her Watcher that Ford was in on her secret and Giles didn’t have to make up ridiculous stories about why she might be wanting to beep her school librarian that night.

 

*** 

 

Buffy took the opportunity of not having her Watcher paying the usual attention to show Ford around Sunnydale ending the grand tour, such as it was, at the school where they spotted a couple of vampires running from the library. 

 

Buffy slid her stake into her hand and produced a fairly large cross to hand to Ford, who had a stake of his own. ‘Wonder where the hell she hides the bloody cross?’ Spike marveled. 

 

The fight was quick and by the time Buffy had taken out the male, there was no sign of the female at all. Ford proudly stated that he’d staked her. “I killed her and she just turned to dust. It was amazing.”

 

It was also patently false. 

 

‘Least now I know how the buggering fucker knew where to find me.’

 

“I need to page Giles. He’ll want to know that his precious library has been violated.”

 

Ford said a polite good-night and left her to it.

 

*** 

 

Giles looked relieved to have his date interrupted. It seemed his girl’s idea of a romantic evening involved monster trucks. Spike snickered and couldn’t decide if he felt sorrier for the Watcher or the teacher. 

 

Buffy filled her Watcher in on the vampires they had slain there at the school.

 

“Hey, who’s this?” Buffy pointed to a daguerreotype portrait of Dru from back in the day. 

 

“She’s called Drusilla. A sometimes paramour of Spike’s. She was killed by an angry mob in Prague.”

 

“Well they don’t make angry mobs like they used to ‘cause this girl’s alive. I saw her with Angel.”

 

“With Angel?”

 

Jenny Calendar piped up, “Isn’t he supposed to be a good guy?”

 

Giles went for further research tomes. “My own research has…”

 

Before he could continue the female vampire minion rushed in, grabbed a book and left through the stacks.

 

“A book! It took a book!” Giles was clearly astounded.

 

“Thick as a block of wood, Watcher. Couple of important things you could’ve learned tonight and you missed them both. First, this library is as safe a place for your precious volumes as a city street. It’s a public building! Any vamp can waltz in here day or night. Even Angel pops in before sundown ‘cause of the tunnels you dolt. No invite needed. Yet you keep all your important research materials and even weapons here. Have your Scooby meetings here too where anyone could listen in. Idiots!

 

“Also that bit about Dru bein’ killed by the mob written up in your precious Council books should tip you off about how inaccurate your bleedin’ books are most of the time. 

 

“Then again, the wanker didn’t even seem to know my Julia’s a female since he called her an ‘it’. Is there nothing you can get right? Wonder the lot of you lasted long enough for me to even get into town. I am deeply shamed.”

 

*** 

 

[](https://imgur.com/uwG3VQu)

 

Buffy watched Dru try to coax the dead bird to sing. She really had become a pale imitation of the vampire Buffy had watched all these years. She could easily understand why Spike had been so desperate to help her. 

 

“Won’t you sing for me? Don’t you love me anymore?” From the way Dru whispered the question Buffy had a feeling she was talking to more than the deceased bird. 

 

Spike entered their bedchamber. “Darling, I heard a funny thing just now. Lucius tells me you went out for a hunt the other night.” Buffy could see the concern on his face. It was obvious that he feared her being caught while not able to fend for herself. No doubt minions paid for that with their unlives.

 

“My tummy was growly and you were out.”

 

Spike bit his lip. No point in chastising his Princess. She wasn’t used to taking orders anyway. “You run into anyone? Like Angel?” Spike worried that Angel would figure out he was going to be needed and would fly the coop before they could figure out how to cure Dru. He was pretty sure her sire was going to be a part of it and half-hoped it would require every drop of the old Ponce’s blood.

 

Dru turned her attention back to the birdcage. “I’ll give you a seed if you sing.”

 

Spike rolled his eyes. He knew that Dru was side-stepping his question. “The bird’s dead Dru. You left it in the cage and didn’t feed it and now it’s all dead. Just like the last one.”

 

Dru pouted and looked about to cry ripping Spikes heart from his chest. He really was letting his jealousy and fear make him into a beast. “I’m sorry, baby. I’m a bad, rude man. I just don’t like you going out. You’re weak.” He wrapped her tightly against his chest and smoothed her hair. “Would you like a new bird? One that’s not dead?”

 

The tender scene was interrupted by Ford boldly pushing his way past a couple of minions. “This is SO cool! I would totally live here.”

 

“Do I have anyone on watch here? It’s called security people! Are you all morons or asleep…” Spike moved in front of Ford and glared at the upstart. “Or did we finally find a restaurant that delivers.”

 

“I know who you are,” Ford smirked acting like the cock-of-the-walk.

 

“Yeah,” Spike was clearly unimpressed. “I know who I am too… what of it?”

 

“I came looking for you. Spike. You are Spike… right? William the Bloody?”

 

Buffy watched as her old friend sold her out. Even knowing the deal that had been made didn’t ease the hurt of the betrayal playing out in front of her. She wondered why Ford had to barter her life that way. He was right there in front of two Master vampires and a room filled with minions. If all he wanted was to be turned it could have happened then and there.

 

‘Maybe he wanted the Slayer dead so he’d be safe when he rose,’ she reasoned. ‘Makes sense but still, just how cold is he to offer me on a platter so he can keep living in some way?’

 

Ford was shooting off his mouth as if he were directing a really cheap B-movie and trying to get Spike to play the lead role to his liking. Buffy could see Spike quickly losing what little patience he had. ‘Really it’s pretty amazing they didn’t just rip him to shreds already. Back then I used to think Spike had little self-control… well, I DO know better now but this would have proven it if I didn’t.’

 

“I wanna be like you, a vampire.” Ford announced as if he was doing the demon world a favor by deigning to become a part of it. 

 

Buffy could see Spike reach the end of his rope. “I’ve known you for two minutes and I can’t stand you. I don’t really feature you living forever.” 

 

Buffy had to agree. She could easily imagine the sort of vampire Ford would have made and it wasn’t a pretty picture.

 

“Well feature this. I’m offering a trade. You make me a vampire and I give you the Slayer.”

 

Buffy sputtered. “Yeah, like Spike needs help with that! Maybe he agreed because he’s made such a big deal to Dru about how hard I am to kill. This way it’ll look like he does need something extra to nail me. Poor Spike, I think Dru knows better.”

 

*** 

 

[](https://imgur.com/fj7GvwL)

 

“We need to talk.”

 

“Do we?”

 

There was a decided chill in the air of the Summers kitchen but to his credit, Angel didn’t shiver.

 

“Buffy, there’s something you need to know about your friend.” Angel shifted his weight from foot to foot revealing his nervousness. “He’s not what he seems.” 

 

Buffy was nothing if not loyal to those she cared about and Angel knew it, had used it to his advantage for that matter.

 

“Treadin’ on dangerous turf there Peaches. Girl’s not so smitten with you yet to just let you trash-talk an old friend.”

 

Spike thought about all he’d seen while watching Buffy grow up and even the young woman from his own time. He loved her for many reasons, but her steadfast loyalty, even to his unworthy grand-sire, was one of the larger jewels in her crown. It took a lot for Buffy to turn away from someone once she let them in. Even repeated betrayals were often forgiven in her generous heart. “She’s exactly what’s meant by the phrase ‘loyal to a fault’.”

 

Buffy had hoped the talk Angel had wanted would be an honest confession about his tryst with Drusilla. She yearned for him to explain the brunette vampiress she’d seen snuggling up to him and his lack of stakage.

 

She wasn’t remotely interested in his latest cryptic warning about Ford.

 

“Willow ran him down on the computer. We found this address and checked it out with Xander and it turned out…”

 

Buffy felt blind-sighted. Why were all her friends suddenly spy buddies with Angel? Xander didn’t even like him!

 

“Xander? Wow! Everybody’s all ‘Harriet the Spy’. It’s just a great big exciting conspiracy,” she huffed.

 

Angel looked constipated. “What are you talking about?”

 

“I’m talking about the people I trust.” She glared at Angel in defiant anger. “Who’s Drusilla? And don’t lie to me, I’m tired of it.”

 

“Some lies are necessary.”

 

Buffy raised a skeptical brow. Everything in her experience had shown that lies always came out eventually and trying to live in them only led to pain.

 

Angel gave her a patronizing look. “Sometimes the truth is worse, you live long enough you find that out.” 

 

Buffy stiffened at his condescending attitude. Really, the last thing she wanted from him was some lecture along the lines of ‘when you grow up, you’ll understand, little girl.’ This wasn’t about youth and maturity, it was about deliberate lies.

 

“I can take the truth.”

 

“Do you love me?” Angel gave her his best ‘needy boy’ look.

 

“Huh?” Like Tina Turner once sang, ‘What’s Love Got to Do With It’?

 

“Do you?”

 

“I love you. I don’t know if I trust you.”

 

“Good call there, pet. Can’t trust him even with that bleedin’ soul he likes to parade around with as if it’s some reward.”

 

“Maybe you shouldn’t do either.”

 

“Oh! That’s the gambit. Workin’ on deflection so she feels bad for puttin’ you on the spot. Make her feel guilty for darin’ to question the great Angelus.” Spike saw Buffy clench her jaw in determination and was proud of her for not backing down.

 

“I did a lot of unconscionable things when I became a vampire. Drusilla was the worst,” Angel began hesitantly.

 

“Got that right,” Spike seethed. “Course you already had a century of practice in your ‘art’ before her. Made your duplicate monster with Penn and turned him loose first. Made Dru so she’d never be fully independent.”

 

Spike listened as Angel told his story … or rather the cliff-notes version that was light on details and devoid of emotion. He could see that Buffy was still too innocent to fully grasp the horrors inflicted on sweet, pious, innocent, Edith. Buffy THOUGHT she ‘got it’, but Spike knew if she truly had, she would never have continued with Angel.

 

Satisfied that Buffy had heard enough, Angel changed the subject back to the one he wanted to address… his perceived competition.

 

“Ford’s part of some society that reveres vampires practically worships them. I don’t know what he wants from you but you can’t trust him.”

 

“All that research you say you did and THAT’S the best you can do?” Spike wondered how any of them ever found the vampire useful at all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N
> 
> Keep in mind that this story is being told based on what Buffy and Spike SEE. Also, that what they see are the events that are intended by Eleos to further understanding and empathy between them. Scenes in episodes where neither were there to witness aren’t likely to show up unless I feel they need to be included and then I’ll have to twist a way into making it possible for one of the invisible travelers to have those insights.
> 
> Psychology of torture (a look into Dru’s psyche) https://www.healthyplace.com/personality-disorders/malignant-self-love/psychology-of-torture
> 
> Harriet the Spy trailer (starring Michelle Trachtenberg) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aGJRDubIzc4&feature=youtu.be
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Harriet_the_Spy_(film)
> 
> What’s Love Got to Do with It, Tina Turner https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oGpFcHTxjZs&feature=youtu.be
> 
> Early photography https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Daguerreotype 
> 
> Vampires and immortality
> 
> https://tucson.com/news/local/immortality-lecture-vampires-symbolic-of-society-s-fears-anxieties/article_5dda0a8b-4877-5162-b53b-7683d262b877.html
> 
> The pursuit of immortality isn’t unique to Ford or the dying
> 
> https://www.forbes.com/sites/nextavenue/2013/11/19/the-ruthless-fruitless-pursuit-of-immortality/#7f5efa4f7025
> 
> The importance of seeing the shades of grey
> 
> https://knowledge.insead.edu/blog/insead-blog/the-importance-of-seeing-the-world-in-shades-of-grey-3938
> 
>  
> 
> https://medium.com/@georgejziogas/shades-of-grey-how-to-stop-black-and-white-thinking-1f6382ccec2
> 
> Lies come in many forms
> 
> https://www.quickbase.com/blog/know-when-someone-is-lying-7-types-of-lies


	58. Chapter 58

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [](https://imgur.com/nKuah01)
> 
> Continuation of ‘Lie to Me’ episode events from the previous chapter, please be sure you read that first. The end scene relies heavily on the script because that moment was so very revealing where Buffy’s mind and heart were for so very long. Script was written by Joss Whedon.

Chapter 58

 

[](https://imgur.com/fj7GvwL)

 

Spike was still upset remembering how Angel had reduced the horror he’d inflicted on Dru to a couple of terse paragraphs that downplayed just how devastating it had actually been.

 

Buffy had been upset, even the short version was damning after all, but Buffy had seen it through her magical Angel glasses.

 

‘Should tell her about that vamp hunter’s family he and Darla massacred. How they turned the poor bloke’s infant just so he’d have to stake his own wee one. Lots of competition for the ‘worst thing’ Angelus ever did.’ Spike had been a first-hand witness to more than one entry for the title, and he’d been dealing with the aftermath of Angelus and his perversions with Dru for a century. Hell, he’d even been on the receiving end of a fair amount himself.

 

Sad part was, even the Buffy of his time still saw the Wanker through those glasses. “Sees all of us demons that way. The supernatural world according to Angel. Don’t matter what’s in front of them, if it don’t match what the great Poof said then twist it all till it does fit. They all do it, not just Buffy,” Spike sighed wearily. Spike wondered if his fellow invisible voyeur had finally had those glasses removed at last. She seemed to have made some changes in her viewpoint but they had so little time to talk as of yet.

 

“Got ‘em believin’ a demon can’t feel without a soul. Willin’ to accept that no soulless demon knows right from wrong. Might have a different definition on that last one but still can tell the difference. ‘Sides, lots of demons have souls. Even those faulty books from the Council talk about demon souls. Wanker hasn’t got a sole claim on that! ‘Sides, his is just a curse and not a reward or trophy to bear proudly.”

 

“Lies everywhere. The school boy’s lyin’, Angel’s lyin’. Hell, I was even lyin’ to myself back then. Had myself convinced that if I just got Dru to full strength again, back to herself, that this time she’d finally put me first. She’d love me best of all. Could see her gettin’ all wistful about her daddy and still I thought we’d leave Sunnyhell closer than ever. Start fresh and strong.”

 

It had been a fantasy, but isn’t that what fantasy is? A pretty lie? ‘Prefer truth, even ugly painful truth. Least you can deal with truth, suss out what it all means, how to cope. Lies make it impossible. Can’t build on ‘em or on those tellin’ ‘em. Can’t fight ‘em either. Like havin’ a sword fight against a mist… nothin’ there that’s real.’

 

Spike watched as Ford baited his trap. ‘At least Angel had given Buffy reason to not be completely blind-sighted. Managed one thing right.’

 

The boy looked smug as Buffy agreed to join him for a ‘surprise’ that evening.

 

*** 

 

Willow was apologetic about working behind Buffy’s back investigating Billy Fordham.

 

As always, Buffy was forgiving. To be fair, the girl really had been convinced by Angel that silence was for the best until they had full information.

 

Angel was a master manipulator with or without a soul and Willow still just barely out of adolescence.

 

Spike followed Buffy as she prepared for her ‘date’ with the boy set to betray her. She had a look of determination about her that made Spike smile. “No wonder she was so self-possessed that night. Had time to process, get her big-Slayer pants on. Suppose the old Ponce helped a bit after all. Mighta’ crushed her if she wasn’t already prepared for somethin’ not bein’ right.”

 

Buffy scoped out the exterior of the club before Ford turned up and felt the hairs rise as she noted the lack of exits and windows. The whole place screamed of ‘roach-motel’ style trap.

 

She kept hidden and watched the deluded kids dressed as if they were trying out for some B vampire movie (‘A cheesy cape? Really?”) filter into the club.

 

Faces made up as if for Halloween, costumes like she’d only ever seen Lothos actually wear, all the trappings of every teen vampire fantasy. ‘At least they aren’t wearing glitter to sparkle.’ Angel had described them accurately enough. It would be funny if it wasn’t so sad.

 

“What kind of lives must these kids have if being undead is appealing?”

 

She heard one cute girl carrying on about ‘the lonely ones’ and wondered why the girl would want to even pretend to be that, much less become one? “Really sounds like a cry for help to me. Who wants to even look like a lonely bloodsucker?” Of course, based on how they looked, they had never seen a real vampire either which was fortunate and rare living on the Hellmouth.

 

Buffy ducked further into the shadows as Billy Fordham arrived. The lonely girl was clearly equal parts excited and anxious.

 

“Is it time?” She asked Ford. “I’m ready for the change. Do you really think they’ll bless us?”

 

Buffy rolled her eyes. ‘God, can you be any more stupid? These kids all lived in Sunnydale! They’d seen friends and family die pretty often and still were seeing this idiotic idea of theirs as a blessing? In what world?’

 

The kids were telling Ford about the visit the night before by Angel, Willow, and Xander. Ford was obviously unnerved. Still, he reassured the group that all would be fine.

 

“I need them to bless me,” the girl repeated. This one must have one terrible homelife for her to want to be anything other than the lovely girl she already was. ‘Bet she doesn’t even use her own name,’ Buffy shook her head sadly. ‘Terrible to want to be not just someone else but someTHING else so badly.’

 

“It’s gonna be FINE,” Ford replied testily. 

 

“It’s really not,” Buffy intoned as she entered the club.

 

*** 

The door slammed shut revealing no handle to open it from the inside. 

 

Ford jutted out his jaw in arrogance and self-righteousness and blew off Buffy’s clear disgust. “I’m going to be one of them,” he crowed.

 

“Vampires are kind of picky about who they change,” her face fell as she realized the diabolical scheme that Ford had in mind. “You were gonna offer them a trade.”

 

Buffy began to frantically search for a way out while side-stepping the clueless idiots all waiting to become the early-bird special at the all-you-can-eat vamp diner that Ford had set up.

 

“No one gets out of here alive,” her supposed friend smirked.

 

*** 

 

[ ](https://imgur.com/uwG3VQu)

 

GhostBuffy watched Spike strut about his lair giving orders like a military general.”Remember to share, people.”

 

She had to smile. ‘How many vampires would even think to say that before a massacre.’

 

Dru was whining about wanting a sweet treat and gave ghostly Buffy a smug look. “Something warm and tasty.”

 

“And you shall have it, my precious, wicked, poodle”

 

Buffy saw it then. Spike really had no choice but to take Ford up on his offer back then. The offer had been made in front of Dru and Spike had made a big deal about how hard it had been to kill the Slayer with each ‘failure’. He likely hadn’t even admitted to himself that his efforts to get that third notch in his belt had been half-hearted at best. Dru had been disappointed after he had failed the first time. She had been livid after Halloween. Spike knew he couldn’t excuse away not killing Buffy this time. There were no words he could have used to explain turning down this opportunity handed to them by Billy Fordham.

 

It would be a massacre though instead of a one-on-one fight between equals. Buffy wondered if he would have counted it as a Slayer kill at all if he’d pulled it off. Bragging rights were important to him but somehow she didn’t think he’d feel this one would count. She decided she might ask him sometime. He’d give her an honest answer even if it didn’t paint him in a good light. ‘That’s one of the best things about Spike, he’s not a liar.’

 

Somehow seeing these events again just underscored how very many lies and liars had surrounded her over the years.

 

*** 

 

[](https://imgur.com/fj7GvwL)

 

Spike watched young Buffy trying in increasing desperation to find some way to save the kids in the club. ‘Even willin’ to save the soddin’ bastard who sold her out. Like Christ in a skirt and heels willin’ to forgive even Judas.’

 

Ford was alternately bragging about his soon-to-be immortal status and whining about the tragic fate the gods of health had handed to him. He was the star of his own melodrama and clearly expected to be seen as the hero in this disaster for some reason. ‘And they say demons have no sense of right and wrong!’

 

“You DIE, Ford. A demon sets up shop in your body but YOU die.” Buffy threw the whole Council ball of nonsense at him with the sincerity of a true believer.

 

“So! At least I won’t be rotting under six feet of sod.” 

 

Buffy continued trying to convince him that he would be killing himself and not living at all and it was setting Spike’s teeth on edge. ‘Wish she had a real clue. Yeah, demon’s there and things change.’ He thought about the disaster that was his mother’s turning. ‘Don’t always work right but that don’t mean the human’s all gone. Satan knows I wished sad Willy had taken a hike along with the soul but he’s still there. He’s always there. Perspective changes. Brakes come off. Guilt’s easy to ignore but lots of humans can do all that all the time. Demon doesn’t have to drive the train.’

 

As Spike railed internally he realized for the first time that Buffy, at least this Buffy (who knew about the new version sharing the ghostly role with him on this journey) and all her Scooby friends and her Watcher really did believe this tripe. They had never treated him like a person because to them he never was and never would be. He was a demon wearing a people suit in their eyes. He felt a deep sadness knowing it was unlikely he’d ever overcome that programming in the group. ‘Maybe Buffy though,’ he thought hopefully.

 

“I’m sorry about the cancer, Ford. It sucks big-time. I even get the temptation to grab at immortality any way you think you can but it’s not like you’re expecting. It’s wrong!” Buffy looked at all the young faces watching the closed door in eager anticipation. “All these other kids will be killed too!”

 

“These kids are sheep. Lonely, miserable and bored sheep.” Ford shrugged clearly unconcerned. 

 

Spike glared at the boy. Even he had more sympathy for the lot of them than this boy did. It was pretty clear that nothing had really been thought out. ‘Maybe Count Chocula thought he’d change right away and was thinking of eating some of those daft buggers for a first meal.’ It was pretty obvious he had as little information and intelligence as he had compasssion. That was one thing about his Slayer, she was chock-full of compassion, even for those who least deserved it.

 

‘Not just demons can look at humans and see no value. Seein’ them all lonely and miserable should have bought a bit of sympathy. Instead, just made this Berk a super predator eager to take advantage.’

 

Spike was shaken from his musings by the sound of a car pulling to a quick stop outside and the entrance of Ghostly Buffy. “Showtime.”

 

*** 

 

[ ](https://imgur.com/AidHJYw)

 

“Feel bad havin’ takin’ the bastard’s offer. Wasn’t fair play,” ghostSpiker admitted contritely.

 

“Well, you were mostly worried about curing Dru and I was in the way. Tends to make you act out of character.”

 

“No excuse. You deserved better than bein’ handed over by Isacariot there.”

 

“That part was on him. You did once say you’re love’s bitch and I’ve seen the truth of that for a good century as a tag along. The only times I’ve seen you do stuff out of character is when you’re doing it for her,” Buffy nodded at Dru. “You’ve taken a lot of risks for Dru where you could have dusted.”

 

“Do anything for those I love,” Spike acknowledged secretly pleased to discover Buffy finally understood that much about him at least.

 

“You’ve got a weird sense of honor but when it comes to love you’re all over the self-sacrifice whether it’s your honor or life you’re willing to toss it away if you feel you have to.”

 

If Spike could have blushed, he would have. “Sounds like you’ve got me all sorted, Slayer.” Part of him squirmed at that thought. He was used to being the insightful one in this odd relationship. Besides a lot of credit for his long survival came from his successful use of masks and armor. He had carefully created the Big Bad Slayer-of-Slayers who caused trembling and fear. Reputation alone had prevented more than one dust-up that could have gone badly with it.

 

He knew this Buffy had changed from the Slayer who’d taunted him and wrestled for the magical device that put them in this situation. He knew, he even loved that far-less friendly version. He wasn’t sure if he could dare to trust any iteration of her enough to bare his belly though. He was raw and vulnerable under her knowing eyes.

 

Ghostly Buffy grinned. He had NO idea. “I can actually say I’ve seen it all, Spike.” She was amused to see him trying to suss out what that might mean.

 

“Reckon you have at that,” he sighed in resignation.

 

“What about you? Any lessons while watching the wild Buffy life story?”

 

“More’n a few. More like continuin’ the lessons that started long before your government got hold of me and decided to have a go at shovin’ wirin’ in my noggin’.”

 

Buffy blinked and found herself really curious “Like what?”

 

“Like remembering people are more than just food. Always made exceptions for those makin’ the world interestin’... more beautiful, fun. Kept them off the menu. No point in livin’ soddin' forever if all there is are cattle and demons.” He half expected Buffy to say something cutting at that but she just continued staring at him waiting for more.

 

“Started to see everyone’s contributin’ in some way to someone… has value beyond what’s pumpin’ in their veins.” He firmed his jaw and led with the truth as always. “Still gotta eat and human’s what a vampire needs to be in top form but the killin’... that part’s not so easy anymore even before I went all Chips Ahoy.

 

“Why is that?”

 

“Blame you lot actually. Your mum… reminds me of my own. Killed lots of mums and gave it no thought really, but just thinkin’ ‘bout Joyce in the ground makes me sick. Kind lady, always treated me like I matter.”

 

“And Slayers?”

 

“Slayers were always the challenge. Best of the best. Go up against a worthy one and win was worth braggin’ about. Lost track they’re really not much more than little girls for all that power for a long time. Drunk on the rush of comin’ out on top. You are all just child soldiers like in those countries that grab the wee ones and make ‘em fight before they even know what life’s all about. 

 

Buffy saw the opening for her question. “Would you have killed me this night if I hadn’t grabbed Dru?”

 

“No!... yes… I don’t know.” Spike looked both confused and pained at the same time. “I don’t know,” his voice only a whisper. “Wouldn’t have counted as fair but was also wantin’ to please Dru over everything else. Big part of me hopes I wouldn’t have. Glad beyond the tellin’ that I don’t have to ever know for certain.”

 

Buffy blinked back tears. It kind of hurt hearing him admit it but at the same time what else but brutal honesty did she expect from her vampire?

 

“Those Slayers I killed were good, real good. Almost had me good and proper the both of them. Lot of the reason I won was luck and me takin’ advantage of surprise circumstances. Didn’t bother with the ones not up to snuff.”

 

“I saw that. You’re a pretty good trainer,” Buffy smiled with affection remembering how many times she’d watched as he tried to help Slayers get good enough for a proper fight only to miss the chance for that final dance in the end.

 

Spike chanced a glance and could see that she meant it as a compliment. ‘Well, that’s just… neat!’

 

“Can’t say in all honesty I regretted winnin’ those two times. Wanna live as much as the next bloke after all and it was kill or dust. Still, admit it’s a shame those Powers set ‘em up, cheated ‘em outta life that way. Don’t feel guilty for winin’ but do regret a bit seekin’ ‘em out to build my own reputation and ego.”

 

“Well, you’re honest about it at least and I kinda get it.” She really did. A century ago she would have been disgusted but she wasn’t the same girl she once was. “I kill too and get off on winning. I never really even accepted that demons can feel, could love or grieve. I’ve seen that’s not so.” Buffy took a deep breath. “I can’t say I’m sorry for winning either but I think some things’ll be different once we’re all physical and regular timey again.”

 

“Life’s complicated I suppose.” Spike wondered just what those differences might mean to him.

 

“Yup. Speaking of complicated,” Buffy nodded toward Dru who had just been grabbed by her younger, corporeal self.

 

“I’ve seen both of you… and more,” she thought of Sam Lawson too. “Dru’s more than just an evil vampire. I get it. It isn’t all black and white.”

 

She looked Spike squarely in the eye. “She can’t just be trusted to run tame though. I’ve seen enough to know that Dru’s dangerous especially to the most innocent even if it’s because she’s screwed up. I can’t make a truce and give her a pass like I did when you were there to keep her in check. Any truce or deal wouldn’t hold even if she wanted it to.”

 

Spike gazed at the vampiress who once owned his heart and felt that dead organ break for the millionth time. He knew Buffy was right. He’d tried all those years with Sam to control her and it only worked for so long before her worst instincts took over. He knew that no Slayer with any sense of duty would be able to let Dru just walk away on her watch.

 

They both knew that no cursed soul would help either. Dru wouldn’t be able to deal with the things she’d done. Her guilt would be real, not imposed by a band of gypsies. She didn’t deserve that pain.

 

Spike desperately wanted to find some way even though Dru had put paid to their relationship. “Maybe a chip?”

 

Buffy shrugged. “I don’t know. Doesn’t Dru enjoy pain? Might not be a deterrent.”

 

Dru’s head shot up and looked at the two invisible beings. “Daddy knows just ‘ow to make ‘is naughty Princess bleed. No burning fishies for Edith, she wants tea and crumpets and pretty dollies in a row.”

 

Real-time Buffy made her move as Dru was distracted and grabbed her close holding a stake to Dru’s heart and yelled out, “Spike!”

 

Ghost Buffy smiled, “See! I knew even then that you’d give it all up to protect her.”

 

Both versions of Buffy were struck with the look of desperate horror on Spike’s face as his beloved was at stake point. Immediately, with not a moment of hesitation, he halted the slaughter. Every vampire in the club stopped at his order.

 

“Funny,” Ghost Buffy mused, “I was so convinced I loved Angel but it was you that I trusted. Not a moment I doubted you’d end the killing. I was used to half-truths and even full lies from Angel. I told him I loved him but didn’t trust him, but I trusted you instinctively.”

 

Spike looked gobsmacked.

 

“Didn’t trust Dru… still don’t. She’s too twisted to be worthy of trust, but you were always different.”

 

Buffy thought about that a bit. She’d come to love and value Spike as well as trust him over this long century tagging along in his life. She wasn’t ready to say that to him yet but she knew it with certainty. Back then the young girl fighting to save herself and a room filled with foolish children had thought she understood love. Thought she loved Angel. Believed she could love him without the trust to build on. She’d told herself fairy-tales, ignoring reality and being willfully blind just as all children do. She knew now what sort of character had true worth. Love that was willing to self-sacrifice, love that embraced truth and honor could be a foundation for something solid. She didn’t want or need lies any longer.

 

GhostBuffy was slightly relieved to see GhostSpike pulled from the scene as the other Buffy fled into the night, rushing into the arms of Angel. She wasn’t quite ready to lay her heart out to her Spike just yet. He seemed to have real feelings for her but for all her growth she still had a slight yellow streak to overcome. She’d come too close to full disclosure this meeting.

 

*** 

 

[](https://imgur.com/fj7GvwL)

 

Buffy sat by the grave looking every bit the mourning friend that her tender heart truly was even after the betrayal. She’d even brought roses.

 

Spike was glad to see the Watcher walk up behind her. She really needed the support of her surrogate father at this time. Everything about this was hard. The lies, the realization that her life had meant nothing, less than nothing, to her first real crush… all of that was bad. To have to plunge a stake into someone you knew and cared about was a pain Spike was far too familiar with and he was pleased that Rupert didn’t make her deal with the clean up of this cluster-fuck by herself.

 

“I don’t know what I’m supposed to say,” Buffy’s voice indicated profound sadness. The fifth-grade girl with her first crush wanted to eulogize the boy and likely that boy deserved it. That boy was long gone though, taken by his own desperation and pain and perhaps the influence of the brain tumor.

 

Spike hoped that Buffy could console herself with that possibility at least. Brain tumors could cause vast changes in personality after all. If she could hold on to that, the pain of being traded for a shot at immortality might ease. Her confidence in character judgment might not take as bad a hit either. ‘Gonna have to mention that next time I see my times Buffy, give her that bit to chew on if she hasn’t already. Maybe ease her mind. What she’s havin’ to do isn’t somethin’ you just move on from and don’t remember.’

 

“It’d be simpler if I could just hate him. I think he wanted me to. I think it made it easier for him to be the villain of the piece,” she looked at the untouched as yet grave sadly. “Really he was just scared.”

 

‘That’s my Slayer, filled with compassion.’

 

“Yes, I suppose he was,” Giles commiserated. He was uncomfortable in that straight-laced British way where talking about emotions made him want to pull a runner. Still, his love for this girl kept him there offering the support she needed and craved.

 

“Nothing’s ever simple anymore. I’m constantly trying to work it out.” Buffy’s brow furrowed in consternation. “Who to love or hate. Who to trust. It’s just… the more I know, the more confused I get.”

 

“Poor lamb. That’s the biggest problem growin’ up, innit? Get’s right complicated.” 

 

Spike startled as he heard the same thought coming from Giles, “I believe that’s called growing up.” He always hated it when he saw similarities between himself and Buffy’s Watcher but truth was truth in the end.

 

“I’d like to stop then, okay?”

 

Giles grinned ruefully, “I know the feeling.”

 

The earth began to shift over the grave as the new vampire created by Dru (‘wouldn’t soil my fangs on the bugger.’) began to rise. Spike had kept Dru from the graveside convincing her that this new baby of hers was doomed from the start.

 

Buffy didn’t even blink as she plunged her stake into his heart putting a rapid end to William Fordham’s immortal life. “Does it ever get easy?”

 

Giles was at a loss, “What do you want me to say?”

 

Buffy brushed off the dust that had once been a cherished friend and fond memory. “Lie to me.”

 

Ahhh, this was a much easier task for Giles than trying to deal with all the expected emotions his Slayer had to be feeling. “Yes. It’s terribly simple really.”

 

The two walked slowly out of the cemetery side by side with ghostly Spike trailing.

 

“The good guys are always stalwart and true and quite easy to spot. The bad guys are easily distinguished by their pointy horns or black hats. We always defeat them and save the day. No one ever dies and everyone lives happily ever after,” Giles intoned with mock seriousness.

 

“Liar.”

 

“True, Buffy,” Spike nodded. “Says a lot that you already know they are lies however much you wish otherwise. Seein’ how you have to go out and play executioner every night it takes a toll with a heart like yours. Seein’ all that grey makes it worse.”

 

Spike thought about his Buffy and how much more complex her life had become, was soon to become for this one. It was a hard path laid out for her. “Not gonna be Angel 2.0 but I can’t go back to ‘pre-Buffy Spike’ either.” Spike thought about all the changes he was going to have to make once this spell ended. The chip wasn’t even an issue now. He didn’t WANT to be what he had been, not knowing how it would hurt the girl he’d come to love. “Maybe Sam had the right idea. Find a way to appease the demon, eat proper but in a way that Buffy can live with. Make any kills count for good if I get rid of the wiring that is and can kill. Maybe help her, be her left hand to rely on, no more destroying the sheep willy-nilly.”

 

In that moment Spike knew his days of lying to himself, and Buffy, were at an end. She, at least, deserved the truth and more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, the sparkling vampires comment is an anachronism as the “Twilight” novels weren’t out for a long time after S2 Buffy. Let’s just pretend that Buffy has that teen-girl imagination that produced the sort of nonsense in those books.
> 
> Vampire cults and subculture
> 
> https://haenfler.sites.grinnell.edu/subcultures-and-scenes/vampire-subculture/
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nfJlgQR3nTA&feature=youtu.be (short look)
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fTewbZrZOoA&feature=youtu.be (longer documentary)
> 
> Vampire “lifestyle” 
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vampire_lifestyle
> 
> https://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2015/10/life-among-the-vampires/413446/
> 
> Reluctance to embrace growing up (and grown-up concepts like nothing being simple)
> 
> https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/surviving-your-childs-adolescence/201701/reluctance-grow-the-outset-and-end-adolescence
> 
> Black and white thinking can lead to depression (Hello… Buffy???) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9rNdWK6Wkog&feature=youtu.be 
> 
> Pretty sure everyone’s clear on Judas and/or Iscariot if only from films but https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Judas_Iscariot
> 
> https://www.livescience.com/65114-judas-is
> 
> For a different take there is this on the non-canon “lost” book of the Bible https://www.npr.org/2006/04/06/5327692/the-lost-gospel-of-judas-iscariot
> 
> Definition of Judas. 1a : the apostle who in the Gospel accounts betrayed Jesus. b : a son of James and one of the twelve apostles. **2 : traitor especially : one who betrays under the guise of friendship.**
> 
> Brain tumors and personality changes https://www.thebraintumourcharity.org/living-with-a-brain-tumour/side-effects/personality-changes/
> 
> https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4467748/


	59. Chapter 59

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [](https://imgur.com/jSg4zfk)  
> 
> 
>  
> 
> Bits of canon referenced from The Dark Age written by Dean Batali and Rob DesHotel and What’s My Line, Part one written by Howard Gordon and Marti Noxon.
> 
>  
> 
> Just a note: (inspired by a comment on the last chapter )... please remember the premise of the story. Buffy and Spike from S4 are “seeing” the other’s life in order to gain insight and empathy. This is the purpose of the spell. That means that as we find ourselves in the time period covered in canon certain bits from the episodes will have to show up. If you feel that “if you wanted to re-do the series you would just re-watch” then this story is not for you because to tell it I have to cover events from the episodes as Buffy and Spike (in essence) re-watch them. I try not to just do a transcript of any episode and also add to them as needed but they cannot be ignored. SO you will see bits from canon from now on until the spell is broken in S4 when they first touched the Eleos icon.

Chapter 59

 

[](https://imgur.com/uwG3VQu)

 

“Funny looking vampire. Wonder if he was a Watcher?”

 

Dalton was getting an unpleasant report from the only minion to make it back alive from the mission. Master Spike would be livid.

 

“There is NO excuse. This was a routine acquisition,” he berated the cowering vampire standing before him.

 

“But The Slayer and that other vampire who follows her around were there and this time he joined in the fight! I barely got away with my hide intact.”

 

“Well the night is young and Master Spike has yet to be informed that his lady will have no meal tonight. You know he’s ordered minimal fresh kills so we don’t draw too much attention to ourselves. Bad enough this Slayer has managed to get in the way of Lady Drusilla’s cure without starving her too.”

 

Buffy’s eyebrows rose. “Never thought about how few extra deaths there were in town even with Spike and Dru there to be a threat. Smart move getting blood other ways.”

 

“But, Dalton…” The luckless minion whined, “There’s all kinds of meals just walking around everywhere for the taking! Me and the boys can go back out and grab a couple easy.”

 

Dalton looked undecided. They were trying to lay as low as possible, not give evidence about how large a nest they actually had or where they called home. Still, the mistress must feed even if the rest of them didn’t.

 

“We’ve all been doing that catch and release method like Master Spike ordered and you’re still getting your blood from Willy like always,” the minion groused. “Hey! Maybe Willy’d have a few pints extra and Master Spike wouldn’t need to ever know?” 

 

“You screwed up, you fix it,” Dalton ordered. “I suppose I could go a day without my regular feed if I have to. Just do NOT mess up this second chance. Come back here with plenty to feed the Lady Drusilla or don’t come back at all!”

 

“Huh. Back then I just thought about stopping the vamps from getting the hospital blood. I didn’t stop to think that by them stealing and using bagged, donated, blood it was keeping them from hunting and killing,” GhostBuffy mused. “The hospital employees were in on it. Maybe no patients were ever being cheated or harmed in the end. Maybe they just ordered more from their supplier and cut deals with demons and Willy?

 

“Wonder how many vamps in Sunnydale fed that way and I never knew?” GhostBuffy remembered that patrol and how Angel had said that they all knew about the blood delivery back then.”Sounds like this in-chargey vamp of Spike’s gets his blood from the bag most of the time too. Wonder if Giles knew about this stuff?”

 

Dalton went to the fridge and took out three bags of blood and fondled them wistfully then sighed and put on a false smile and headed towards the chamber that served his Master and his Lady.

 

“I sent Daryl back for more Master Spike but thought Mistress Drusilla might enjoy a bit of an appetizer.” He offered the bags to Spike. “I believe B-positive is a favorite of hers?”

 

Spike nodded and took the bags over to the small microwave sitting on the counter.

 

Dru looked wan and in some pain as she languished on the bed. Each time Buffy saw her she noted that Dru was declining further. ‘No wonder Spike was so frantic.’

 

*** 

“Wanna tell me why you’re givin’ your meals to Dru… and where Clive and Buster are for that matter?” Spike knew he could trust Dalton to be honest. The timid scholar was terrified of his new Master and still not sure of the internal politics of this nest.

 

“Well, see, Master Spike...there was a bit of trouble getting the supply this week.”

 

“What kind?”

 

“Um… the Slayer showed up along with the souled vampire and they dusted all but Daryl. I sent him to WIlly’s to get more.”

 

“Cursed,” Spike snarled.

 

“Your pardon?”

 

“Angelus is cursed. He likes to prance around calling himself a ‘souled vampire’ like it’s some gold star reward but it’s just a curse for bein’ a right bastard.”

 

Dalton blinked, “Oh, indeed.”

 

Spike tilted his head and looked at his head minion with a bit of respect. “You gonna have enough for yourself?”

 

“I’ll make do, Master. I can always see Dr. Throckton at the morgue for more if I need it.”

 

“Make it easier on you to just do a catch and release like the rest,” Spike reminded him.

 

“Yes sir, but you know I’ve never fed that way. It was a number of years after I was turned before I even drank human blood at all. Once embalming became commonplace and they had all that blood that they drain I finally tried it. I admit I heal faster and am healthier with human blood but I got by on animal for a long time.”

 

Spike shook his head and grinned. “You’re an odd duck, Brains.”

 

“You are a kind Master to allow me to feed my way and not punish me for not being demon enough to live.”

 

Spike shrugged. Dalton was a useful minion, smart as a whip and no grand ambitions. “Your last master give you a hard time then?”

 

Dalton shuddered. “The Master had a certain standard for all those around him. I didn’t fit. If it wasn’t for my abilities in translation he would have eliminated me.”

 

“Never met the prat but from what I did hear from Darla he was a prancin’ fool. Slayer did our kind a favor offin’ him.”

 

Dalton snorted.

 

“So… he was your sire?”

 

“Oh, no,” Dalton looked abashed. “I don’t know who my sire was. I was unconscious and wounded in battle when some vampire finished me off. Must have either been killed before I rose or just didn’t care enough to stick around and explain things.”

 

Spike thought back to his own rising and felt a pang of sympathy. It was terrifying enough when some other vampire was there to make sense of it all. To be alone and not even remembering the turning bite would be beyond horrible.

 

“Woke up hungry of course. Gorged myself on some stolen rations left by the army and it did no good… as you’d imagine.” Dalton looked haunted for a minute. “Finally ran down a deer and found myself craving the blood, not the meat. Still had no idea what I was or why I had such a need but at least I knew how to stop the hunger,” he lowered his eyes in shame. “Animal blood was all I knew for a long while. It was quite a few years before I even ran into another vampire and learned something about what I was.”

 

“Not that many vampires where you were? Bit surprised. Most war zones are like a magnet.” Spike quirked a brow. “So, a soldier then?”

 

“Not by choice… just necessity. I was conscripted. I was a tutor, having my degree in the classics. I helped many a young gentleman prepare for University,” he said with pride. “Then the army came in and began to round up ‘volunteers’ for the campaign against the French and their Native allies and I found myself in a red-coat and off to battle.”

 

Spike looked as intrigued as Buffy. “So the French and Indian War then?”

 

Buffy had to giggle. She remembered when the subject came up in history class and how she’d wondered why the French were fighting the Indians.

 

“Yes, so it is called by history.” Dalton looked a bit sad. “I never did return home. Was killed in the wilderness and left to rot … only I rose instead.”

 

“So once you found out what you were you didn’t change the menu?”

 

“I saw no reason to and had no ill will towards humans. I lived alone for a long time only being pulled into company with other vampires when Heinrich Nest discovered I could translate some scrolls he needed. No escaping service to him after that.

 

“I’m just glad you don’t torture me for not being what I should be. I’m your devoted servant for your kindness and understanding, Master.” Dalton’s position was clearly submissive.

 

Spike gave him a puzzled look. It had never been his way to torture another, trying to mold them into his idea of proper demon hood. That had been Angelus’ game. “No problem. You’re not the first vampire workin’ for me to make his own way. Fella named Sam Lawson only hunts and kills enemies of the U.S. military. Was turned during the second Great War and still servin’ in his own way. Think he was in Bosnia till a couple of years ago, not sure but imagine he’s in Kosovo now. Reckon I’ll hear from him sooner or later.” Spike grinned and shrugged.

 

“Meal’s a meal and if it made him a contented vamp pickin’ his dinner that way, no skin off my nose is it? Count the bloke a friend, only vamp I’d call that. Trust him with my life, Dru’s too.”

 

Dalton looked impressed and a bit less nervous in Spike’s company.

 

“Well,” GhostBuffy thought, “That explains this vamp. Wonder whatever happened to him?”

 

*** 

[](https://imgur.com/fj7GvwL)

 

“Gotta agree with Rupes, that noise is anything but music,” Ghostly Spike shuddered as he watched Buffy torment her watcher with aerobics to music, or so she called it. He tilted his head and enjoyed watching her breasts bounce as she did her moves to the beat. 

 

Neither of the occupants of the library could hear the frantic pounding on the door over the racket. Spike pulled his gaze from his Slayer being all perky and fit and moved to see what or who was urgently calling out to the Watcher. 

 

Seeing the man killed by the demonic woman who then puddled into a goo only to be absorbed by the newly deceased was unsettling even to a vampire who’d seen most everything.

 

“This can’t be good.” Spike had heard nothing about this particular nasty back in the day. Clearly Buffy and Giles had survived whatever bad news this was but none of Spike’s minions had ever told of some other Big Bad in town back then.

 

***

Spike felt an uncomfortable twinge of sympathy for Giles as the three teens went out of their way to underline his age in an unflattering light. True the man could be a bit of a prig with a massive stick up his arse but he wasn’t THAT old! 

 

Spike thought maybe he was chafing a bit at the way he’d felt as the three teens had been playing “anywhere but here” and making him more aware of their youth with every word. Spike had smiled at Buffy’s imagining herself with the singer from Bush. ‘Likes ‘em a bit edgier than old Stone-Face it seems. Wonder how long it’d be before Angel would bore her into a break up if things hadn’t turned it into a whole teen-angst cock-up?’ Spike filed away the idea of a foot massage in his ‘to-do’ box for some hoped-for future. His Buffy wasn’t that much older than this version after all.

 

Giles parted with the gang after arranging for Buffy to join him that evening to prevent the hijacking of a hospital blood delivery. ‘Ah! So that’s why the Slayer suddenly showed up to foil my simple plans.’

 

Frankly, the time spent in the schoolrooms bored Spike endlessly. The standards of learning had deteriorated drastically since his time as a student. Buffy was fairly bored too. “Have a feeling it’s more that she sees no future that needs the information rather than already knowing the information.” 

 

Once more he mused about how unfair it was to these young girls to have their lives stolen at such a young age. He remembered how smart Buffy always was and how she had enjoyed school before she was called. ‘Shame, really. My Buffy could shine as brightly as Red there if she wanted to.’

 

***

The Watcher was ‘off’. Spike had no idea what was going on but it was as if a switch had flipped and he’d gone from the normal handing out of assignments and vaguely pompous attitude to being a slacker at least as far as his Watcher duty was concerned. 

 

Buffy had been at the appointed place at the right time and took out two of Spike’s more disposable minions but Rupes had been a no-show. ‘After making such a big deal out of keeping food out of the mouths of law-abidin’ vamps too!’

 

Angel with all the facial expression of a figure from Mount Rushmore had shown up, not that Buffy really needed the backup. Once more he imparted information long after it might have been of help. How was Buffy supposed to know that blood was a black-market commodity in a town filled with Vamps unless someone let her know that not all vamps just grabbed dinner off the hoof? ‘Bet she doesn’t know about the bite-houses either. Giles should do a better job of lettin’ his Slayer know how the real world works.’ Spike determined to clue her in once they were back in their own time and she could use the 411.

 

*** 

It seemed that Rupert and Buffy weren’t as close back then, or at least not as open with one another. ‘Watcher keeps secrets.’

 

“Would have been wiser to have told your Slayer about the demon you and your tearaway mates diddled with. Could’ve saved her a world of hurt.” Spike wondered if Buffy still bore the tattoo that Ethan Rayne had put on her to tempt Egyon into attacking her instead of him.

 

Giles’ teacher-bit-of-fluff wasn’t too pleased either considering she’d had to house the demon until Angel choked her unconscious!

 

All in all the whole situation could have been nipped in the bud with a bit of communication.

 

“Rupert’s too concerned with that bloody decorum he goes on about. Worried about his image even when it would have been helpful to fess up.” Spike thought about it a bit and wondered why the Watcher still withheld so much. 

 

It was clear that his Ripper days had shown him a great deal about the demon world. Not just Council nonsense either. First-hand information that would have done more good for Buffy to learn than the rot in the books that Giles had to know was faulty at best. ‘Gonna have to have a bit of a chat later.’

 

One thing was clear though and that was how important Rupert Giles was and likely would always be to Buffy. He was more than a Watcher. He was more of a father figure. ‘Better than the one she got from DNA,’ Spike grudgingly admitted.

 

It also surprised Spike how much those Ripper bits reminded him of his William-the-Bloody exploits. ‘Less the spikes in the head, o’course.’ He grinned. “Who knew the old goat had such a wild and rebellious streak?”

 

Watching Giles safely back in his proper tweed, safe once again hiding behind all his books Spike also had to see a bit of the scholarly William he had once been in the man. “It’s like the man he is now is a bit of what I might have been and the Big Bad I am now is what he was once on the road to becoming.” It was an unsettling idea.

 

***

“Yeah, I called it,” Spike shook his head in sadness. The school was having a career day and Buffy had all but admitted she was seeing nothing in her future worthy of her aspiration. 

 

“No wonder all those girls wind up with a death wish. When you have nothing to hope for or dream about you die a bit every day. Add to it the pain and constant fight of the job itself and it’s no wonder they’re ready to cash in their chips in just a few years.”

 

Xander was oblivious and his comments served more to comfort himself that Buffy would be in a dead-end future just as he would be once school ended. ‘Bit passive-aggressive of the jerk,’ Spike growled. “Buffy could be running countries if she had the opportunity. Born leader! That nonsense about bein’ some schlub workin’ at the DMV was a low blow. Buffy looks like she bought it too.”

 

Spike knew that Buffy loved the boy like family but that didn’t mean that the kid didn’t need a good talking-to. There were a lot of good traits there like loyalty and bravery but there was also an underlying meanness and bullying that Spike saw wasn’t all directed at him. Buffy got her fair share all under the guise of jokes. 

 

Like all bullies, Harris had to try to pull others down to make himself feel better about himself. “Gonna have to work on the boy. Shame the Watcher blows it off. Kid needs correction before he ruins every good relationship in his life and hurts all those he says he loves.”

 

Spike wasn’t sure how to get through to Xander and didn’t really care all that much for his own sake. ‘Still, boy is important to Buffy. Buffy is everything to me. Gonna have to take it on for her sake. Can’t have him hurtin’ her this way over and over, undermining her esteem and all.’

 

***

[](https://imgur.com/uwG3VQu)

 

Buffy watched Spike pace and growl. Dru was weakening more and more, her grip on her demon bits was loosening and he was no closer to finding the thing that would save her.

 

Dru looked drugged with her drooping eyes and near-whisper of a voice. She moved around Spike clearly trying to be enticing like in the good-old-days. “Dance with me, my Spike.”

 

It was obvious that Spike’s mind was focused on the research and not his beloved’s cooing. He pushed past Dru, not roughly but in her weakness, it was enough to put her off-balance. She mewed and stumbled. “Careful!” Spike’s voice was harsh in his warning. Buffy knew that he wasn’t angry with Dru but was at the end of his emotional rope.

 

Dru’s lower lip jutted out and she whined.

 

“Forgive me,” Spike instantly apologized and grasped her elbow to lead her to a chair. “You know I can’t stand seeing you like this and we’re running out of time.”

 

Dru hadn’t eaten, merely sipped at one of the bags of Dalton’s stash while Spike hovered over her. It reminded Spike of how his plans for caring for Dru were being thwarted right and left. He couldn’t catch a break!

 

“It’s that bloody Slayer. Whenever I turn around she’s mucking up the works,” he grumbled. 

 

Dru’s voice seemed to come from far away. “You’ll make it right. You always take such good care of your Princess.”

 

Dalton was still jotting down translations from the book Spike’s minion had taken from the library. Saying the words aloud made it clear that it was gibberish.

 

Much as Spike truly liked the bookish vampire his patience was at an end and he’d lashed out. 

 

Dru had been laying out a tarot spread and muttered, “‘E can’t ‘elp you without the key.”

 

”Key? This mess is in code then.” Spike looked into Dru’s eyes seeking confirmation. “Are your pixies telling you where to find a key to the code?”

 

Dru just gave a half-smile and tapped a card with a picture of a crypt on it.

 

Ghost Buffy remembered catching Dalton at the tomb and scaring the wits out of him but also remembered that they managed to get the fancy cross that broke the code. Back then she had been frustrated and angry that the vampire had gotten away with his prize. Now she was glad.

 

‘Maybe Spike can have a bit of peace for a while at least.’

 

*** 

Dalton presented the cross and gave his report that Buffy had stumbled on him as he was retrieving it. It had been a close call and they had nearly been prevented from getting the one thing they needed to read the text and find the cure. 

 

‘Somehow the Slayer was on to them! Couldn’t just be bumblin’ about by chance.’ The girl was all that stood between seeing his precious Plum strong again and losing her forever. Miss Summers pulled at something within him, something that made him not want to see their dance end but that something wasn’t worth losing Dru over.

 

“She’s a bloody thorn in my side. Have to do something.” Spike narrowed his eyes as his mind raced. “There’s no way we’ll complete the cure with that bitch breathin’ down our necks.” He stopped his pacing and grinned wickedly. “Need the big guns, they’ll take care of her.”

 

Dalton’s eyes opened owlishly, “Big guns?”

 

“The Order of Taraka,” Spike sneered.

 

GhostBuffy shuddered at the memory. She’d been pretty disappointed back then that Spike had outsourced the plan to kill her. The hired killers were creepy and dangerous but the thought that Spike had found her not worth his time had hurt too.

 

Dalton looked gobsmacked. “Bounty hunters? For the Slayer? I thought you wanted to kill her yourself, add to your reputation.”

 

“And so I will,” Spike grinned.

 

“But… the Order...”

 

“Think those ‘Three Stooges’ rejects can take THIS Slayer? This’ll just keep her busy and out of my hair while we work out the details for the ritual. THEN I’ll call ‘em off, if they’re still alive that is, and get I’ll get my third Slayer all proper like.”

 

Somehow seeing this conversation made Buffy feel better in spite of it being about plans for her death. ‘Probably only because I know how it did work out.’ 

 

It hadn’t seemed in character for Spike to hire killers. ‘This makes sense though. Or Spike-sense at least. Anything for the one he loves.’

 

*** 

The translations were going much faster now that there was no interference from Buffy. ‘I was pretty busy with career day and gun-happy human assassins,’ Buffy huffed. That had been a bit of a shock. 

 

The Order of Taraka was made up of humans as well as demons. The bug guy had clearly been a demon and the female was human as was the ugly one that looked like a cross between a Biker and Kenny G. 

 

Buffy hadn’t stopped to think about how evil it was that humans would take a contract to kill the Chosen One meant to protect humanity! She’d been more upset about her first real date with Angel being interrupted and her unique position as THE One being challenged by the second Slayer at the time. ‘Gotta love my priorities!’ she chuckled.

 

She and Kendra had formed a bond eventually but it had been a rough start. 

 

‘I ignored a lot of important stuff back then. Lots of clues that humans and demons are just species and not an indicator of evil. I guess I wasn’t ready to see it.”

 

***

Dalton was struggling a bit with the final part of the ritual instructions and had turned to Spike to help choose the proper interpretation. All the minions watched in curiosity before Spike ordered them to leave the room and stop loitering.

 

Once they were alone Dalton tried again. “But Master Spike, you know Latin as well as I do and Greek far better than I ever understood it.”

 

“Yeah,” Spike shrugged. “Look around though. How many of these chuckleheads d’ya think would be challengin’ me if they thought I had a head stuffed with real knowledge?”

 

Buffy knew he was remembering back to his William past and being the butt of everyone’s jokes, dismissed by his peers instead of appreciated. She also thought about how Angelus taunted Spike for his intelligence in the very early days before he started calling William an idiot. She got it even if Dalton was confused.

 

“How much respect do YOU get? Got enough on me carin’ for a sickly sire without takin’ on every idiot who still thinks a brain means weakness.”

 

Dalton gulped then turned back to the translation with downcast eyes. It was true. Even Dalton knew that brains were not a valued commodity in the demon world as a rule.

 

“Yeah.” Buffy smiled slightly. “We do have a lot in common. Even if our reasons are different neither of us wants anybody to really know how smart we can be, how much we really know.” 

 

Buffy often used the ploy of mangling words and putting on her best valley girl attitude to get out of research and long lectures. The little bit of normal life she managed to carve out would be eaten up with that stuff if Giles snapped to her rouse. 

 

‘Just like in school, too. If you’re too smart the other kids hate you and make life hell. Not too different from demons that way.’

 

***

[](https://imgur.com/fj7GvwL)

 

Spike’s eyes were wet as he watched the damage the Tarakan assassins had done. Buffy had been enjoying her free time on the ice. 

 

“Haven’t seen her so carefree since she was called and I had to be the one responsible for ruinin’ it.” He wondered if the older Buffy would let him take her skating one day to make up for it and feared it more likely that he’d done too much damage over those months to really have a chance with the girl even if she was acting more friendly now. Once they were back in normal time who knew?

 

“At least Angel actually did something right by the woman he claims to love. Took out Curley.” 

 

Spike felt a deep shame and tons of remorse as he remembered having called in the Order. ‘Least I called ‘em off right away. They never even sent replacements, just the first three she had to deal with’

 

He’d been surprised to see the spare Slayer spying on Angel and Buffy though. He’d never really known when the lovely Caribbean Queen had come to town until now. “Chit was pure cannon fodder even with her skills. Just the kind of Slayer the Council always pumped out… all form, no instinct. Rigid and single-minded too. Met so many like that! Was a wonder she lasted as long as she did.”

 

Not for the first time Spike was grateful that Buffy had been protected from the Council as much as she had been. “Powers must have somethin’ special in mind for her to protect her from their meddlin’.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Provincial troops in the French and Indian Wars https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Provincial_troops_in_the_French_and_Indian_Wars
> 
> French and Indian Wars 
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/French_and_Indian_Wars
> 
> https://www.lcmm.org/explore/lake-champlain-history/french-british-military-conflict-1664-1763/
> 
> Conscription and the British army in the eighteenth century https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Recruitment_in_the_British_Army
> 
> Quick primer on French and Indian war https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0bW51Jnu9tQ&feature=youtu.be
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=esozMEFRflk&feature=youtu.be 
> 
> Embalming process step by step https://basicfunerals.ca/funeral-industry/the-embalming-process/
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z_IyPVN3LyM&feature=youtu.be
> 
> 18th Century University information in a nutshell https://history.stackexchange.com/questions/41469/how-did-people-apply-for-university-in-the-18th-century?noredirect=1&lq=1 
> 
> USA military involvement in 1998 https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kosovo_War 
> 
> Bosnian war https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bosnian_War 
> 
> Kosovo and its history in under 4 minutes https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o1XPEn_CU90&feature=youtu.be
> 
> The breakup of Yugoslavia and the Bosnian war https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0zjMb75vyrs&feature=youtu.be
> 
> Spike might not be completely right about why Xander acts as he does at times. The link between low-self-esteem and bullying is not as simple as that after all. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/intense-emotions-and-strong-feelings/201010/do-bullies-really-have-low-self-esteem 
> 
> Passive-aggressive bullies https://healthyworkforceinstitute.com/blog/deal-passive-aggressive-bully-3-strategies-leaders/ 
> 
> Bullying can disguise itself as humor https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/think-well/201206/think-sarcasm-is-funny-think-again 
> 
> Xander’s humor often took a turn on the dark side even towards Buffy but not every time. 
> 
> http://www.encouraging-appropriate-behaviour.com/blog/index_files/fun-and-jokes-verses-bullying-behaviour.php 
> 
> The Three Stooges https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Three_Stooges
> 
> Clip with Curly https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QxxQhZBxo4A&feature=youtu.be
> 
> Kenny G https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=447yaU_4DF8&feature=youtu.be 
> 
> Order of Tarakan human Buffy calls a cross between a biker and Kenny G and Spike calls Curly
> 
>  
> 
> [](https://imgur.com/PZCJApp)  
> 


	60. Chapter 60

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [](https://imgur.com/m4TFKog)
> 
>  
> 
> Bits taken from What’s my Line, Part Two written by Joss Whedon and Marti Noxon

Chapter 60

[ ](https://imgur.com/uwG3VQu)

 

Ghost Buffy watched as Spike tenderly held Dru and sang softly to her. He used to do that a lot, Buffy remembered, but this was a sad tune that reflected his inner poet. Dru was fading further and it was breaking his heart. 

 

“Black is the color of my true love's hair,

Her lips are like some roses fair,

She's the sweetest smile, And the gentlest hands,

I love the ground, Whereon she stands.

I love my love and well she knows,

I love the ground, whereon she goes...”

 

Dru smiled wanly. “Don’t fret, my dark Knight, it will all come to right. The stars promised.”

 

Spike kissed her brow and shushed her. “Don’t use your strength, my sweet. Rest for now. The new moon is soon here and you’ll be right as rain before you know it.”

 

“Sing me into the dark, Spike, please?”

 

“As my Princess requests,” Spike resumed the sad ballad and tears ran down his cheeks as Dru drifted to sleep.

 

***

[](https://imgur.com/fj7GvwL)

 

Spike watched the two Slayers face off. The new girl was no match for his Buffy, of course. She was typical Council cannon fodder. All rigid technique, no imagination. Born to slay and die. ‘Just what those sick buggers want. Nothin’ but a replaceable weapon.’

 

Buffy finally got through to the stubborn girl with the magic word: “Watcher”. Evidently this Kendra was not willing to accept Buffy’s word that she was the Slayer, but a Watcher, that was another thing altogether. Spike shook his head in disgust. ‘Arrogant bastards. Make themselves the be-all and end-all for these girls, take over their lives, use ‘em, bury ‘em and demand obedience while they’re still above ground.’ Spike was glad that Rupert Giles wasn’t the typical Watcher. Likely they hadn’t expected Buffy to live long enough to bother with sending one of their supposed best.

 

As the girls got things sorted and Giles finished chatting up Kendra’s Watcher Spike took note of how awkward the girl was around the others. ‘Must keep her in a box till ready to deploy for battle the way she acts. Fewer social skills than Angel!’

 

Listening to the girl putting on superior airs about how well trained she was made Buffy feel insecure. Buffy could have used some kudos from Giles about then. His girl was special. She wasn’t tainted by the ways of the Council. She was clever and skilled and had an impressive record of important kills starting with Lothos and even Nest. There was nothing this new girl had that Buffy didn’t have in spades save a bit more reading of those flawed texts that did her no good anyway. 

 

Spike had to feel a bit sorry for the spare. Girl didn’t even have a last name, or so she claimed, much less any ties with the world! “Least the others I’ve seen knew their own bloody name!” She said she had a picture of her family but no memories. ‘Yeah, she won’t last long.’

 

He also noted that there was more than a bit of jealousy over Buffy’s relationships underlying her boasts. The girl might talk a good game about secrecy trumping the need for family and friends but it was clear that in Kendra’s deepest parts she missed those connections that make a human … human. She was completely unable to even look at Harris! ‘Her Watcher must be a right bastard.’

 

“Just trust me, Angel’s on the home team now. Wouldn’t hurt a fly,” Buffy was saying. Spike hadn’t been paying attention to the conversation but at Angel’s name he tuned in.

 

“I cannot believe you. He looked to me like just another animal when I…”

 

Buffy looked terrified. “What did you DO?” she demanded, murder in her eyes.

 

Well, one thing this Kendra DID get right was trying to point out that Angel was a monster. ‘Dress a goat up in a tux and you’ve still got a goat, just better dressed.’ Spike couldn’t fault her even though Buffy clearly did.

 

*** 

 

Willy was not forthcoming about what had happened to Angel. 

 

“No ashes,” Kendra pointed out. “So I tink I did not kill him.”

 

Buffy glared at her sister Slayer, “So I don’t have to kill you.”

 

Both Kendra and Spike could tell that this was not a bluff. “Girl threatens another Slayer all for the Poof!” Spike swallowed a lump in his throat. “Powerful lot of love there to vow vengeance against not just a human but another Slayer over a vampire.” He felt the jealousy well up. “Fucker don’t deserve her. He’d never put her over anything else like that.”

 

Willy lied with well-oiled ease. He claimed to have freed Angel from the cage that Kendra had used to imprison him. “He said he was gonna stay underground, you know… recuperate, stay out of the way of the second, less friendly, Slayer.”

 

*** 

[ ](https://imgur.com/uwG3VQu)

 

Willy pushed a weakened Angel down into the sewer tunnel and reached for his payment from Spike. “Here you go my friend. He’ll be good as new in a day or so.”

 

Spike reached down for Angel. 

 

‘Why aren’t you fighting to get away?’ Buffy was confused. Angel wasn’t burnt, the sun hadn’t even damaged him. Why was he letting Spike and two minions defeat him without so much as a struggle?

 

Spike was paying Willy for his troubles. And the barkeeper asked, “So what’re you gonna do with him?” Angel had been bad for Willy’s business, always showing up and making the regulars nervous looking for little tidbits of gossip or news to feed his Slayer. Willy would be glad to see the back of him.

 

“I’m thinking maybe dinner and a movie. I don’t want to rush into anything,” Spike quipped and gave a smirk in Angel’s direction. “I’ve been hurt you know.”

 

Spike gave Angel a look of disgust. He’d noted the same thing that GhostBuffy had. Angel wasn’t wounded and the sun had merely threatened him. ‘Don’t see any burns. Wiltin’ like some damned hothouse petunia though. Should be givin’ me a good fight instead of layin’ there like a delicate flower that’s been without water. Hell, I’m always playin’ peek-a-boo with Mr. Sunshine and even blazed up a time or two and didn’t let it make me all go over all damsely.’ He hoisted his grandsire up and thrust him towards the minions, ‘No stamina!’

 

At first, it seemed strange to Buffy watching Angel give himself over without even trying to get away until she thought about it. ‘Yeah, he CAN fight but usually tries not to.’ She thought back to the Angel she knew back then and how infrequently he entered into actual fights, at least against any possible foe who might have a chance to beat him. He picked his battles and they usually were against weaker demons and vamps or the odd human. 

 

Spike had delivered Angel to Dru’s chamber. The girl was still terribly weak but there was a glimmer in her eye that showed she was looking forward to some alone time with her daddy and not for the usual reasons. Miss Edith was in command and Miss Edith had a bone to pick with the monster who had destroyed everyone and everything she’d ever loved.

 

Buffy watched as Dru tied and tortured Angel with words and Holy water. Once again he put up no fight at all. He writhed in agony as the water scorched his chest leaving it red and raw but not aflame. 

 

“You’ve been a very bad daddy,” Dru whispered and slapped him soundly. She poured the water sparingly intending maximum pain and minimum damage as she lost herself in the memories of every outrage. “My mother ate lemons. She said she loved the way they made ‘er mouth tingle.” 

 

Dru had a far-away look and her never healed grief was obvious. “Little Anne, ‘er favorite was custard… brandied pears and pomegranates.” She poured more of the tortuous liquid on him hitting his shoulder and back as she crouched behind her captive. “They used to make ‘er face and fingers all red.”

 

Dru looked at her own fingers evidently seeing all the red from blood she’d shed coating them and looked ready to cry. “Remember little fingers? Little ‘ands?”

 

Buffy put her hand over her mouth as she considered the horrors that Dru had endured, the memories she still carried all this time later. She understood even better why Dru would go into a tailspin every time her demon went on a spree and took its delight in child victims. Miss Edith must have suffered terribly every time.

 

“They used to eat cake and eggs and ‘oney… until you came…” She leveled an icy stare on the whimpering Angel. “And ripped their throats out.” She articulated each word carefully in a clipped tone.

 

Somehow Buffy couldn’t dredge up much sympathy for Angel. The things he’d done to Dru and those she’d loved were beyond imagining and had never been more clear to Buffy than while watching Miss Edith trying for a bit of payback while the daddy-loving demon was at bay.

 

Buffy had watched Dru for decades and had already seen her as far more than just a demon, a monster. Now she wept for the victim, the girl who caught the eye of the absolute worst guy ever.

 

Spike re-entered the room and cut Angel loose. “Time to go, Princess. Gonna make you all better. Strong and fit.”

 

He pulled Angel’s head back by his hair and sneered at him before tossing him over his shoulder and reaching out to help Dru rise. “Weak Wanker! Dru’s done worse to me just playin’. Why’d you think she’s got Holy water in her toy box at all?”

 

Angel groaned but didn’t reply.

 

“Crybaby. Can’t take it can you? Good thing Darla didn’t do you like you did me. You’d never have survived. Pair of you, and Dru besides, did lots worse to me just for a lark. Can dish out torture day and night but can’t take a bit of it yourself.” He swatted Angel’s arse, “Who’s the weak one now, Peaches?”

 

*** 

[](https://imgur.com/fj7GvwL)

 

Kendra was looking very fish-out-of-water in the halls of Sunnydale High School. The gang had been shocked to find out that she had never been to school.

 

“Me Watcher taught me all I need to know,” she’d insisted. She then began to chat up Giles about some books on demonology known for their complexity. 

 

Giles was fascinated by all the books the girl had mastered, all of them related to Slaying.

 

‘Bet she can’t do ANY algebra or read any book that isn’t about Slaying,’ Buffy thought.

 

“Yes, well, I saw that the Handbook would be of no use after meeting Buffy,” Giles quipped.

 

‘That’s because I gave your big useless book back to you right away!’ Buffy gritted her teeth. Maybe Giles would have been happier with a Kendra. The thought made her sad. Then again, maybe she could just retire and let Giles and the Council have their precious Kendra-the-Perfect- Slayer and she could finally have a normal life! She tried to ignore the little voice that told her she’d be bored within a month.

 

Spike watched as a new boy sidled up, clearly interested in WIllow. The group was all talking about the results of their career day evaluations. 

 

Buffy hadn’t been happy that her aptitude had come down strongly on law enforcement but actually that’s what a real Slayer was supposed to be he figured. “Demon police. Can’t very well just toss us in jail and go to court after all, not when humans don’t even admit we exist.”

 

Willow was asking her fresh catch about his potential career interests. “What about you? Don’t you have some ambition?”

 

“Oh, yeah. E flat diminished 9th,” Oz nodded.

 

Spike let out a burst of laughter. “Boy’s a musician,” he nodded in approval. “That’s the ticket, make things of beauty, lad. ‘S the only thing that lasts in the end.”

 

“The E flat’s doable, but it’s the diminished 9th,” Oz continued as Spike nodded in agreement. “That’s a man’s chord, you could lose a finger.”

 

Spike suddenly realized this was the boy who had caused Willow so much grief by leaving. ‘Werewolf I think she said.’ Too bad. Spike had a feeling they could have become friends if he’d still been Red’s snuggle-bunny.

 

As Spike watched the laid-back part-time-demon he missed seeing the female cop pull a gun and point it at Buffy. “Look out!”

 

The boy threw himself over Willow and took the bullet himself. Mayhem ensued as gunshots rang out and kids scattered. 

 

Spike recognized the female member of the Order and seethed. He’d only wanted Buffy distracted not shot full of holes! 

 

Kendra came flying from out of nowhere and took out the Tarakan assassin before anyone else got shot. 

 

*** 

 

The gang regrouped in the library after Oz had been carefully bandaged, thanked, and sent on his way. ‘Not part of the group yet, I guess,’ Spike realized.

 

Giles was explaining what his research had uncovered and it wasn’t good. “I’ve discovered the remaining keys to Drusilla’s cure. The ritual requires her sire and it must take place in a church on the night of the new moon.”

 

“That’s tonight!”

 

Buffy’s brow furrowed with worry, “They need Drusilla’s sire? You mean… the vamp who made her?”

 

At Giles’s nod Buffy looked crestfallen. “It’s Angel. He’s Drusilla’s sire” Her eyes welled with tears. “Will it kill him?”

 

Giles nodded in affirmation.

 

Buffy immediately flew into action with plans to rescue Angel even recruiting a reluctant Kendra.

“I’ve had it! Spike is going down. You can attack me. You can send assassins after me, that’s fine. But nobody messes with my boyfriend.”

 

For the first time since Spike had reconnected with Buffy in their ghostly forms, he hoped it would be a while before they saw each other again other than as a silent watcher. He was deeply ashamed at having brought the Order of Taraka to make Buffy’s life even more dismal than it already was. He hoped she wouldn’t be reminded of all the reasons she had to dislike him by revisiting these events. ‘Just when the girl stopped lookin’ at me like I was somethin’ she’d stepped in.’

 

*** 

[ ](https://imgur.com/AidHJYw)

 

The ritual was already underway when Buffy arrived at the church. Willy had double-crossed her but she didn’t care. She was right where she wanted to be and Angel wasn’t dust yet.

 

‘Just my luck,’ sighed Ghost Spike. “‘Lo, luv. Gonna clip me a good one again?”

 

Ghost Buffy frowned. Surely Spike didn’t think she was still angry about what had happened a lifetime ago?

 

Ghost Spike cleared his throat. “Suppose it won’t mean much to apologize for those three killers I sic’d on you or the heartache,” he nodded towards the tableau of Angel and Dru tied together, hands run through with the ritual knife. 

 

Ghost Buffy blinked. ‘He did!’ Part of her wanted to let him stew a bit. She wasn’t used to apologies from Spike after all and that part wanted to savor it a bit. Finally, mercy and Spike’s distraught face won the day. “No, Spike. This all happened so long ago it’s not the same as it was the first time. So much has happened, I’ve seen and learned so much since then. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t like seeing Angel hurt or Oz shot but I understand it all better… the why’s, they matter.”

 

Ghost Spike felt like crying with relief. Maybe he wasn’t totally buggered then. “Felt I had no choice. Was losin’ her more and more every day. Was killin’ me watchin’ her go a bit at a time.”

 

“I do get that. You really did love Dru, truly and deeply.”

 

“For a long time.”

 

Ghost Buffy nodded. “I thought I loved Angel that way too back then.”

 

“Thought?”

 

“Well, turns out I didn’t really know him. You can’t love someone you don’t know.” Buffy smiled sadly. “That was my first time giving my heart you know.”

 

“I do.”

 

“He’ll always matter to me but my eyes are open now. Maybe it’s more the memory of how it felt that will always matter more than… him.”

 

Ghost Spike thought back to Cecily and knew exactly what Buffy meant about it all. He didn’t know that cold bitch either but the feelings of love had been overpowering. Even if he were to see her now he’d have a soft spot but it wouldn’t really be love or even about her… it would be about how it had felt. That first brush with love and passion.

 

“Still. Wouldn’t do the Taraka thing again if I had it to do over.”

 

Ghost Buffy laughed, “But you WOULD still tack Dru and Angel up together.” She knew the answer and hoped he could sense that she was teasing a bit.

 

“Likely so. Always seem to want to do right for a hurtin’ lady.”

 

Ghost Buffy quirked a brow.

 

Ghost Spike shrugged as he snapped to her skepticism. “Okay, ate more than a few and hurt ‘em in the process ya’ got me there. Not ladies I care about though.”

 

“You’ll always care about Dru, I get that.”

 

“Not in the same way. Have learned that the heart can love lots of people though. No one takes the place of another… the heart just grows bigger, big enough to love more.”

 

Before Ghost Buffy could ask who else he might have in his heart the scene around them flashed bright with fire as those past events climaxed with the organ falling on Spike, pinning him beneath it as the church burned.

 

The ghostly figures watched as Buffy and Kendra each put an arm around Angel and got him to safety while the flames spread. ‘Took TWO Slayers to help the Ponce out?’ Spike marveled.

 

Ghost Spike felt the tug to follow but not before he heard Ghost Buffy say, “I wouldn’t leave you there this way if I had it to do over.”

 

*** 

[](https://imgur.com/uwG3VQu)

 

Dru was stronger than Buffy had seen in years. The interrupted ritual had returned her power to her as they had hoped but she was still clearly out of balance just tipped the other way.

 

Whereas before the ritual the demon had been all but dead and taking Dru with it, the ritual had almost totally submerged the parts of her that remained of Miss Edith. She was in full game face most of the time with the demon firmly in control.

 

That demon wanted only one thing… it’s sire, its beloved daddy.

 

Dru had always been as she’d been trained… MADE… to be: a daddy’s girl. But when there was balance she had always loved Spike as well as she could. She saw the man who had called to her human bits so long ago. She craved the love and tender care he’d always offered freely and whole.

 

The demon cared only as far as keeping Spike from dusting. He was her get and he served her loyally and well. Her Childe, made to tend her needs and cater to her whims gave him value. THAT the demon in control wanted at her side.

 

That demon also knew well that Spike wouldn’t want daddy anywhere near them. Would fight to keep Angelus from returning. It was in the demon’s interest to keep Spike weakened, too weak to challenge Angelus once he returned as the Pixies had promised. Thus he was on starvation rations. Healing, but with dreadful slowness.

 

Dalton was disturbed seeing Master Spike treated this way. He’d been severely disciplined when he’d tried to sneak a couple of bags from his own stash to help his Master heal. In fact, Dru forbade Dalton from taking his regular deliveries from Willy from that point on.

 

He still didn’t hunt, not even catch and release, but ate his meals while out; frequenting the morgue and a few friendly mortuaries.

 

Dru had her faithful, freshly minted, minions check Dalton each time to be certain he wasn’t smuggling a bag or two for Spike.

 

Spike languished in pain and boredom until it finally caused Dru to order minions to bring a Bath Chair to alleviate his boredom from being bedridden at least. His spirits improved a bit after that.

 

“See, my Spike… mummy’s got you a nice chair to get around in, just like at the fancy spa.”

 

“Got some a bit more modern, pet,” Spike groused as he fiddled with the relic. “Wouldn’t mind one of those, but ‘preciate it,” he fumbled his way into the uncomfortable and awkward unit. Still, any freedom of movement was a relief.

 

The facial burns itched as they slowly healed as did the many cuts but that was more of an annoyance than anything. It was the lack of feeling from the waist down that ate at his soul, or would have if he still had it. His lady was finally healthy and strong and he was weaker than he’d ever been since his turning. 

 

“Just feed me proper and I’d be up in a few weeks.” Spike couldn’t understand why Dru ignored his pleas and his explanations. It was like she didn’t want him well and that confused him.

 

“In good time. Family reunions time enough for feasting,” she answered cryptically. She laid out her Tarot spread and smiled slyly, “Not long now.”

 

Dru narrowed her eyes and stared at Ghost Buffy. “The sun will shine on daddy through the rain and ‘e’ll be ‘ome where ‘e belongs very soon,” she whispered.

 

She began to hum a merry tune as Spike clenched his teeth and wheeled himself into the bedchamber and the solace of the telly.

 

Dalton’s heart broke for him. Whoever this ‘daddy’ was didn’t seem like someone he was anxious to meet.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can’t find the link to the anecdote but the entire reason for Kendra and the second slayer was because Joss had the lines, “Two Slayers, no waiting,” that he wanted badly to use somewhere and thus was born the idea that another Slayer was called when Buffy died. If anyone can find where this anecdote was recorded I’d appreciate you dropping me a line.
> 
> “Black is the Color of My True Love’s Hair” (old Scottish ballad, this version by the sublime Cristy Moore) 
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HHz7cZ1vA7Y&feature=youtu.be
> 
> Bath in the UK was a prominent mineral spa frequented by those seeking healing properties from the waters in the old Roman baths as well as drinking the waters in the pump room. The idea of wheelchairs (sometimes called Bath chairs because of the number of people using them at the baths) and spas would be in Dru’s mind because in her time that would be where you’d see people using the chairs for the most part. 
> 
> https://www.tripsavvy.com/history-of-spas-3085930 
> 
> The Grand Pump Room is still there to explore and was filled with health seekers and polite society taking the waters even in Dru’s time
> 
> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Grand_Pump_Room Jane Austen used this setting in a few of her novels. You can still have some of the famous waters along with an elegant meal https://www.romanbaths.co.uk/pump-room-restaurant
> 
> Cannon fodder https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cannon_fodder 
> 
> There was a lot of criticism over the accent Kendra used. Even 20 years later it is called awful. https://www.telegraph.co.uk/tv/0/cast-buffy-vampire-slayer-now-pictures/bianca-lawson/ 
> 
> According to Marti Noxon in the commentary for What’s my Line, Part 1, “Kendra was never intended to have an accent. The addition of the Jamaican accent to the character was a last-minute decision and a dialect coach was brought in. He taught Lawson a dialect supposedly from a very specific obscure region of Jamaica.” 
> 
> This vid shows that there is more than one way to “speak like you are from Jamaica” https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FgRAc7_Msp4&feature=youtu.be I say Kudos to Bianca regardless!


	61. Chapter 61

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [](https://imgur.com/hylH0yf)
> 
> Okay, I’ve tinkered and revised and decided to stop being obsessive and post this chapter LOL. Sorry for the delay. 
> 
> Episodes touched on and/or dialogue borrowed or twisted from: Ted, written by David Greenwalt and Joss Whedon, and Bad Eggs written by Marti Noxon

Chapter 61

 

[](https://imgur.com/fj7GvwL)

 

Spike had to wonder why the Caribbean Queen was leaving. She’d said she had been sent to Sunnydale because a great evil was rising. ‘If that meant Dru gettin’ better then you’d think she’d stick around to see to stoppin’ her. Don’t know if I should feel chuffed to think they pegged me for that title or not. Course the real great evil’s Peaches and the little Slayer’s leavin’ before the party even starts there.’

 

Buffy had thanked Kendra for her help in saving Angel and Spike had to snark to himself about how it had taken two Slayers to get the berk out of the church! 

 

The one bit of sense from the whole conversation between the Slayers was Kendra pointing out to Buffy that her way of viewing their calling was off. Buffy was seeing it as a job, one she hated. Giles and Angel carried on in a way that made it a vocation, a burden as well. Kendra pointed out, rightly, that it wasn’t either… it was WHO Buffy is. ‘Till you embrace all your parts and start acceptin’ ‘em, you’ll never be happy, pet.’ Maybe Kendra had planted a needed seed. Spike hoped so. Maybe he could help cultivate it a bit too once they were together in a way that could be possible. 

 

*** 

 

Spike was no longer surprised seeing the things that really threw Buffy off her game. None of them involved slaying or demons, except her own personal variety. 

 

“Still has buckets full of daddy issues,” Spike noted. He’d watched her panic when Joyce had begun to date the pushy bloke. He was pretty sure Buffy would have credited some sort of instinctive feeling that something was off for her reaction but the real truth was that she hated the idea of Joyce bringing someone else into their lives. If Joyce ever did truly move on it meant that the dream in her deep subconscious, the one where Hank woke up and realized all he’d thrown away and came back, hat in hand begging for another chance, that dream would have to die.

 

Lots of children of divorce hold on to that dream even if only in the deepest parts of their mind. 

 

Buffy showed the real issues she had with Ted while rebandaging Angel. 

 

‘And just how long is he gonna play the fadin’ patient and make Buffy be all Florence Nightingale? Wanker knows how to milk an opportunity! You’d think the hand had been lopped off not just run through and bled a bit,’ Spike huffed. ‘Try savin’ your lady while an unhappy mob’s after you or having a whole bloody church dropped on you with no one to tend your hurts.’

 

Spike thought back to how much tougher Angel had seemed, how much more torture he took without acting like a bit of fluff when he’d had him tortured to get his Gem back. “Maybe just likes to play the dainty maiden so the Slayer’ll be all tender and carin’. Bein’ the damsel in distress forced a bit of fantasy starrin’ nurse Buffy.” Spike rolled his eyes. 

 

“Okay, so my mom needs some man in her life. Does it have to be Ted?” Buffy had pouted.

 

“You have someone else in mind? Is there a guy out there who would satisfy you?”

 

“My dad?” Buffy looked ready to cry. 

 

‘Yeah, there it is. Still missin’ Hank, bastard that he is.’

 

“I’ll try. I’ll be the dutiful daughter and try to like him,” Buffy had promised. 

 

And just like that, right when Buffy’d made the first bit of effort, Ted showed his true colors. 

 

Spike had wanted to rip him to pieces when he’d threatened Buffy at the miniature golf game and wanted to comfort her when everyone else took the jerk’s side. “Bloke’s got a real fan club. Must be some amazin’ cookies.”

 

Eventually, Ted revealed himself as the far from perfect potential step-dad that he’d seemed to be on the surface. Buffy's being proven right was good under the circumstances. “Poor lamb thought she’d killed a human,” but not as good for her denial about why she had initially been so averse to the man … er… robot… in the first place. Until he’d been threatening and pushy he’d merely seemed over-eager and a bit old-fashioned.

 

Watching her suffer when she thought her acting in self-defense had led to the death of her mom’s disliked boyfriend had really put her in a tailspin though. Spike wasn’t sure how she would have bounced back if it had been left at that. If Ted had just been a human moving on her mum. She and Joyce had a tense relationship after Ted ‘died’ and Buffy had been eaten up with guilt. 

 

Perhaps part of Buffy’s initial fears were that she’d be losing Joyce in some way? She had already lost even a semblance of having a close relationship with Hank Summers and her lack of honesty about her true life with Joyce was a barrier to closeness. Having a new person taking the front-and-center place in Joyce’s life had to make Buffy feel threatened. 

 

“That’s her biggest demon. Fear of losing those she loves the most.” Spike worried that Buffy might shut down completely should she ever truly lose Joyce. ‘Needs to sort herself. Every time she loses another person close to her it adds to the insecurities.’

 

As for the robot-boyfriend-from-hell, Spike was mostly confused. He could understand someone being driven to creating something like that. ‘Someone gets lonely enough, I could see it.’ But this wasn’t some awkward bloke who made a companion to fill the emotional void. Ted Buchanan had made a robot version of himself complete with flaws, misogyny, and homicidal tendencies. “More like the wanker was lookin’ to find a way to become immortal. Nothin’ human or of the real Ted there though, not like the bits left when someone gets turned.” It made no sense that Spike could figure. Ted was dead… long dead. What good was there in having some bits of plastic and wires masquerading as him runnin’ about at that point?

 

‘Seems like a Twilight Zone episode or one of those Sci/Fi books or films, only in them the ijit transfers their mind into the robot not just programming the thing to act like them. Old Ted wanted to make himself immortal he’d have been better off actin’ like that Ford jackass and find a vamp to turn ‘em. Maybe find a witch or warlock to mojo some kind of long-life spell or the like.’

 

Spike shook his head in confusion. Sometimes he truly didn’t understand humans and he liked to think he was pretty insightful.

 

*** 

 

Spike wasn’t sure what was more tedious to watch, school or shopping. “Now if Buffy was tryin’ on pretties it might be a mite more interestin’.” The only things Buffy had been trying on were endless pairs of shoes though, and even if Spike did admit her feet were as perfect as the rest of her, it wasn’t enough to hold his attention long.

 

He wandered to the Hot Topic to check out the inventory while the Summers women continued the quest for the perfect pair of pumps next door.

 

Things livened up a bit when Buffy headed out on her own to pick up Joyce’s dress only to discover that Vampires did come out in the daytime, at least to hunt the indoor malls with sewer access.

 

Lyle Gorch was cozying up to his dinner date when Buffy cornered him. Somehow the Gunsmoke reject managed to get away.

 

Spike wondered where the little brother was. The Gorches always traveled together and usually hunted together too. He’d first met the pair at one of the ‘Wild West’ shows he and Dru had enjoyed back in the day when the ‘new world’ was still new to them and Buffalo Bill and Sitting Bull were still thrilling the public. The two lamebrains had a sharpshooting act that wasn’t good enough for the management to put up with their preying on the audience after the shows. 

 

“Haven’t changed their look,” Spike noted. “Worked better back then. Stick out in a crowd now.” Spike eyed the merchandise at the Hot Topic and congratulated himself on having a look that was standing the test of time.

 

***

 

Buffy missed class to report the mall vamp incident to Giles. It also got her out of the embarrassment of having to sit in a room with other hormonal teens to listen to the teacher try to explain the birds, bees and the dangers of… um… bird flu and bee stings.

 

“Sex education,” Spike smirked. “Now there’s a teacher deservin’ of combat pay.”

 

Buffy looked at the egg that Willow had given to her to ‘raise’ as a substitute baby. That seemed to set off a couple of other insecurities with his Slayer.

 

“I can’t do this,” she moaned. “I can’t take care of my stuff. I killed my Gigapet!”

 

Spike thought about Dru and the number of live pets she’d managed to kill without meaning to. “Maybe I should have gotten her one of those Giga things or a Furby. Mighta had better luck. Then again, coulda gone like Buffy and killed it off too”

 

“I’ll just lay it off on my partner,” Buffy shrugged. “Who’d I get?”

 

“There was an uneven number of kids and since you didn’t show…” Willow reddened as she thought about her erstwhile partner in egg-parenting.

 

“So I’m what? A single mom?” Buffy looked at her egg sadly. “What does that say about me? I’m doomed to live my mother’s life? How deeply scary is that?”

 

Ghost Spike looked at her tenderly. “Oh, pet, I’d stand by your side, help you with any number of kiddies if you want ‘em.”

 

While Buffy was angsting over single motherhood, fate, and perceived innate inadequacies, Giles had succeeded in locating the Council’s information on the Gorch brothers.

 

“... they’re not among the great thinkers of our time. I doubt they’re up to much. They were probably just drawn here by the Hellmouth’s energy,” the Watcher opined.

 

“Nuff said. I propose Buffy slay them. All in favor?” Xander quipped and raised his hand to start the voting that Willow quickly joined.

 

“So the boy thinks Slayer decisions are a democracy,” Spike raised a brow. He thought about the group dynamic in the time his physical body still resided and thought it might just be what they truly did think.

 

“Not Hellmouth energy,” Spike shook his head. “Sires call. That religious zealot, Luke put out a call to all Aurelians last year when Bat Boy’s uglier brother was plannin’ on a grand re-entrance. Not sure which of the Master’s line sired the two idiot cowboys but they’re family. Darla always suspected Doc Holliday did the honors before kickin’ it himself.” The vampire world lost a decent dentist that day!

 

“You really ought to strengthen your numbers when you go up against these two,”” Giles suggested.

 

“Why? They’re light-weights and morons on top of that,” Spike wondered. “Watcher hasn’t got a clue how good his Slayer is if he thinks she needs help with those two. Hasn’t he been payin’ attention?”

 

“Maybe Angel could help you find them,” Willow winked at her bestie.

 

“Oh right,” Xander snarked. “I see a lot of hunting getting done in that scenario. Angel and Buffy alone, late at night.”

 

Spike hated having to agree with Harris… ever… but the boy was right.

 

Buffy rolled her eyes, “Please! Angel and I are just helpless slaves to passion. Grow up.”

 

*** 

 

Spike felt his stomach roil as he watched Buffy and Angel on ‘patrol’. ‘Come over all queasy watchin’ those two. Harris didn’t need Dru’s pixies to get it right though.’ Spike turned from the sight of Angel and Buffy kissing madly.

 

“Wonder the Pecos Peckers didn’t just have a real good day with all the attention the Slayer’s payin’ to her patrol,” he huffed as he spotted the brothers watching the smooching lovers. “Old Helpful Handjob’s no use either. He should at least feel family nearby.” Spike bit back the jealousy. “Best get used to it mate. Girl’s got it bad for the big lug right now. It’s only gonna get worse.” He wondered how he’d handle seeing Buffy give herself to Angel when it finally did happen.

 

*** 

 

Ghost Spike watched the train wreck as Buffy focused more on Angel and her fantasy future than the evil taking over her friends as the demon eggs hatched. 

 

He’d seen her toss and turn with what must have been a Slayer dream. He’d seen that often enough to tell the difference from a regular run-of-the-mill nightmare since his girl had been called. She was getting warnings but her mind was on locking lips with Angel.

 

When she finally did twig to something amiss, it was left to just herself and the dolt who’d hard-boiled his pretend offspring to stop the Bezoar spawn from using their zombified humans to free mama as she reproduced herself like an African Driver Ant on steroids.

 

“High school basement… yeah, that has ‘welcome evil’ written all over it,” Spike thought as the pair pretended to be as controlled as the rest of the teens and adults breaking the concrete to gather eggs and free the demon. 

 

They were making fast work of it too from the looks of it. The eggs were being gently passed to be put out into the public to control more humans and the hole where mother Bezoar was spawning away was widening at an alarming rate.

 

As Buffy searched for a decent weapon she ran into Lyle and Tector Gorch and they threw down in a fight completely ignored by the working zombies. No one noticed at all except Xander and Ghost Spike.

 

Tector fell into the hole as Buffy came face to face with her zombified mom much to her horror

 

In all the confusion Tector pulled himself out of the hole and came after Buffy only to have zombi Giles knock him back in.

 

Lyle panicked seeing his brother fall back in rapidly followed by the sounds of Tector being devoured by the mama Bezoar. He turned livid eyes on Buffy, “This is all your fault!”

 

As they fought, mama reached out a tentacle for seconds and pulled Buffy into the hole.

 

Ghost Spike watched helplessly reminding himself that his girl survived. As far as he knew she’d only died once after all. “Where the HELL is Angel? Shows up to play tonsil hockey when the girl needs to be on her game but never around when she could use actual backup.”

 

In short order Buffy emerged from the hole, Bezoar goo all over her as the mystically released humans fell into a dead faint.

 

A wide-eyed Lyle looked at the pissed off Slayer who was clearly more than he could handle took off running.

 

“Typical Sunnydale-Denial-Syndrome,” Spike laughed. “Gas leak! Yeah, should just keep with the usual and say it was a PCP lab that blew up. Keep the coverup in the same liar's oeuvre at least.”

 

***

 

Spike watched Buffy, now grounded even further by Joyce, confined to her bedroom now with only bathroom privileges. She was greeting the useless Poof at the window like bloody Juliet in a high school performance of Shakespeare.

 

From his vantage point, it drove home Buffy’s youth. Her frilly little girl’s bed was covered with a menagerie of stuffies and other things of childhood.

 

“If that soul’s supposed to make gramps so moral, why’s he not seein’ she’s not ready for a guy older than dirt? Yeah, the hormones are all sparkin’ but he’s the adult here, no excuse for him.”

 

“You sure you aren’t gonna get in trouble?” Angel whispered as he stole another kiss.

 

“Course she’s in trouble, you randy berk! Should let the girl grow up before you paw all over her,” Spike growled. “Hell, I thought she was hot back then but didn’t grope her and not just cause of Dru either. Let the chit age at least a bit longer. Then again, Liam wouldn’t have waited either.”

 

*** 

 

[](https://imgur.com/uwG3VQu)

 

Dru whined. Spike hated when she did that. It was always before some demand that she knew Spike didn’t want to indulge.

 

“We’re ever so close now, my Spike. Just a couple of missing parts and Mr. Bits will be all ‘ole again. The party will be so lovely.” She twirled and danced in anticipation of her treat.

 

Spike had been playing this game since before Prague. Dru had heard about a demon who destroyed all things human with just a touch. The Watchers Council had dismembered the coot long ago and spread the parts to the far corners of the earth because it was supposedly impossible to destroy him with any weapon forged by man.

 

Spike and Dalton had discussed it one night after Dru went out to hunt and Buffy was surprised to hear what Spike had to say. She’d always believed he had been the brains behind putting the monster together just to devil her.

 

“Playin’ a tight game, yeah? Have to keep her placated so I ‘search’ for parts. Don’t want the Wanker in one piece though. Crazy for any vamp to want that! Who’re we gonna eat if all things human are gone? Like if humans killed off all the livestock. ‘Sides most of US have enough human still to be in danger. Daft idea.”

 

“That’s wise Master Spike. So why do you collect these parts?”

 

“Psychic innit she? Would know if I stopped lookin’.”

 

“I don’t understand, Master. How will you prevent this Judge person from rising if you’re gathering his parts?”

 

“So far it’s worked. I lose a piece for every one I find. Keeps Dru happy thinkin’ it’s a matter of time without actually comin’ close.” Spike glanced at the front door as if expecting Dru to come in full of fury from overhearing. “Not as easy to fool her now the demon’s behind the wheel. Only one part left and I’m not sure how to stop it this time. Rather hopin’ the Slayer’ll be as inventive as I know she is and can find a way to stop it once and for all.”

 

Dalton nodded and Buffy felt proud that Spike had so much confidence in her. It was Xander who’d come up with the solution after all though. Ghost Buffy debated telling Ghost Spike that fact next time that she saw him. “Spike’ll hate having to credit Xander for pulling the fat out of the fire that time!” she grinned.

 

“Why is Mistress Dru so insistent about awakening this Judge?”

 

“Got it in her head… maybe some message from the stars or somesuch… but it’s stuck there like in cement. Convinced it’ll somehow bring her precious daddy back to her.”

 

Ghost Buffy shivered. “Well it did in a way. Thinking Angel was going to be gone for a long while getting rid of that demon part is how I wound up at his apartment and sleeping with him.” Dru really was cunning.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Children of divorce who want parents back together:
> 
> https://www.mundahllaw.com/divorced-parents-get-back-together/ 
> 
> Fallout from nasty divorce on children
> 
> https://www.divorcemag.com/blog/child-parent-relationship-after-high-conflict-divorce
> 
> Introducing a new partner to your children after divorce
> 
> https://www.worthy.com/blog/divorce/relationships/introducing-your-new-partner/
> 
> Robots and AI
> 
> https://science.howstuffworks.com/robot6.htm
> 
>  
> 
> Artificial Intelligence Robots Development Until 2019
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UAfqE7ctcgs&feature=youtu.be
> 
> Sex education in US public schools https://www.parents.com/kids/education/sex-education-in-schools-heres-what-your-kid-is-learning/ 
> 
> Comprehensive Sex education can cut down on teen pregnancy 
> 
> https://www.aclu.org/blog/reproductive-freedom/study-finds-comprehensive-sex-education-reduces-teen-pregnancy
> 
> Okay, not eggs (demon or chicken) but the “lesson” is similar
> 
> https://www.boredpanda.com/teens-babies-class-project-chippewa-secondary-school/?utm_source=google&utm_medium=organic&utm_campaign=organic 
> 
> And a silly look at sex ed in high school https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1C2lVTpMsUg&feature=youtu.be 
> 
> Teens, hormones, and sexuality
> 
> https://www.newportacademy.com/resources/empowering-teens/teenage-hormones-and-sexuality/ 
> 
> The adolescent brain beyond hormones 
> 
> https://www.health.harvard.edu/mind-and-mood/the-adolescent-brain-beyond-raging-hormones
> 
> Article: The surprising truth about modern hook-ups 
> 
> https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/all-about-sex/201602/the-surprising-truth-about-modern-hook-ups
> 
> One of the people who was an early influence on the Hollywood image of the cowboy (as opposed to reality) was Wyatt Earp who acted as a consultant on many early Hollywood westerns and was a heavy influence on such actors as John Wayne https://www.americancowboy.com/lifestyle/the-influence-of-wyatt-earp-on-john-wayne
> 
> Some westerns got it close to right though https://truewestmagazine.com/historically-accurate-westerns/
> 
> Some real cowboys/wild west images (and a couple of “movie” western shots too) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nzq0WcuWikA&feature=youtu.be
> 
> Clip from Gunsmoke https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aqyojnM9tlc&feature=youtu.be
> 
> Buffalo Bill’s Wild West show (actual footage) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g3meHAqxuDI&feature=youtu.be
> 
> Doc Holliday https://www.biography.com/personality/doc-holliday
> 
> Vampires and TB https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/New_England_vampire_panic 
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KNcYHsxai5w&feature=youtu.be
> 
> Bat Boy https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bat_Boy_(character)
> 
> Gigapet ad from 1998 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jh9O9pxwQEs&feature=youtu.be
> 
> Furby ad from 1998 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PHWcBbf0Eng&feature=youtu.be 
> 
> Insects are no slouches when it comes to reproduction and the African driver ant, which can produce 3 to 4 million eggs every 25 days, is thought to be the most generous of all. (per National Geographic… must subscribe to view the link though)


	62. Chapter 62

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [](https://imgur.com/gFYIQ3Y)
> 
> Episode ‘Surprise’ was written by Joss Whedon and Marti Noxon bits of dialogue borrowed from the script.

Chapter 62

[](https://imgur.com/fj7GvwL)

Buffy was writhing on the bed clearly deep in a nightmare of some kind. “Prob’ly dreamin’ ‘bout Forehead. Enough to give ya shudders.”

“Angel!” Buffy screamed and sat straight up in the bed.

“Yup, called that one.”

Spike followed Buffy to Angel’s apartment in dread. He knew it was around the time for the two angsty lovers to succumb and was stealing himself to cope when the time came.

“What’s up?” Angel was anxious. Buffy didn’t make a habit of showing up on his doorstep unlike his frequent visits to her bedroom window, or bedside vigils.

“I had this dream. Dru was alive. It was awful,” Buffy let out a sob. “She killed you right in front of me.”

Angel drew Buffy into his arms and soothed her, “It was just a dream, Buff, not real. Not every dream you have comes true.”

Spike watched Angel holding his Slayer and let the jealousy roll over him. “Yeah, that’d be more like MY dream. Dru havin’ enough of her daddy and gettin’ rid of him, leavin’ the berk to float in the wind. Nice dream, that. Trouble is Dru’d rather dust herself than see one stiff, porcupine hair on Angelus’ head so much as get a split end.”

“But what if Dru IS alive? We never saw her body,” Buffy was terrified.

“Huh?” Spike wondered how many bodies of vampires the Slayer had seen for that question. “How could you tell what dust pile was from a vamp in a fire?”

“She’s not,” Angel hesitated. Buffy didn’t notice his cagey expression.”But even if she was, we’d deal.”

Spike snorted. “That’s right. Lie to her face. Know damned well Dru’s alive, me too. Don’t tell her you’d know, she might wonder why you never used that blood connection to deal with the rest of your misbegotten family longsince..”

Angel stopped Buffy’s tears with tender kisses eliciting gagging noises from the ghost in the corner.

“I have to go to school,” Buffy reluctantly broke away.

“Yeah…” Angel agreed only to pull her in for further kissing.

“SCHOOL… pay attention gramps. The chit’s still just a schoolgirl. Don’t matter to her, but should to you if you really loved her.”

“You still haven’t told me what you want for your birthday.” Angel smiled.

“Surprise me.”

*** 

Buffy and Willow were playing BFF catch-up in the hallway between classes. Spike was fairly surprised at how much personal information girls shared or demanded to be shared in this era. ‘Not much private business I suppose.’

“I actually said ‘I like you at bedtime’; like majorly red here!” Buffy confided.

“Was he into it? Does he want to see you at bedtime too?” Willow’s look was avid. She was clearly living her fantasy life through her best friend.

“Think so, but he’s cool about it.”

Willow nodded, “‘Cause he’s cool. He would never… you know…”

“Push,” Buffy nodded in agreement.

“Right, he’s not the type.”

‘Shows how little you know him. ‘Course he’s not the type to push. Easier to manipulate. Make the girl think it’s all her idea then she can’t come back and blame you. Liam was a master at that. Angelus was even able to manipulate fuckin’ Darla when he wanted somethin’! Don’t know his brand of magic but don’t think I want to either. I like my girls willin’ on their own… or would if any of ‘em ever …’ Spike sighed and wondered once again just what there was about him that always made him second choice if chosen at all.

Willow was urging Buffy on, talking about carpe diem and laughing at Buffy, making fish jokes.

“I think we’re going to seize it sometime … later… once you get to a certain point seizing is sort of inevitable.”

Spike’s shoulders drooped with the weight of that inevitable. “Fuckin’ hormones and lack of impulse control. Downfall of many a fine young woman, cause of lots of daddy-less kiddies too. Course, in this case, all that was born was the worst version of Liam O’Connor. Darla might have put the demon in him but the original human was bad enough for hell already.”

Buffy was nudging Willow to go talk to the young man who had been showing special interest in the shy redhead, telling her to seize a bit of day for herself.

Spike approved of Willow moving on from her tragic crush on Xander Harris. The diminutive musician seemed a good match for the girl.

***   
[](https://imgur.com/uwG3VQu)

Dalton placed the box carefully on the table. “I have your package Master.”

“Just leave it there with the other prezzies.” 

Spike looked terribly pale and gaunt. He had burns on part of his face. Dru was only feeding him the bare minimum and had done nothing to ease the pain of his injuries.

He’d been trying to convince Dru to leave Sunnydale now that she was at full strength. “Sunnyhell’s friggin cursed! Angel and the Slayer see to it,” he’d insisted.

Dru merely smiled slyly and danced away. “I ‘ave good games for everyone, you’ll see.”

She was eagerly arranging her own birthday party and celebration of her wellness and the factory was looking fairly festive. All the minions had been scampering about putting up decorations and gathering gifts. One of the more recently turned minions was arranging a red velvet cake using blood to make it the proper shade of red. Spike had even slipped away to pick out a prezzie or two for his lady-love.

She’d told him not to bother, that she was about to get the best present ever very soon but Spike was determined that the bloody demon she was wanting wouldn’t have all its pieces by the big day. 

So intent on trying to figure a way to get rid of a piece was Spike that he’d missed her crooning about wayward daddies and making up for all the lost time. GhostBuffy had caught it though and realized that Dru knew well what was soon to happen.

When Dru headed to their bed chamber to consult with her dollies about napkin folding choices, Spike rolled up to Dalton and grabbed one of the boxes containing a Judge part along the way.

“Just make sure this bloody thing finds its way on a slow boat to China, yeah? Take a couple of the less stupid minions with you, have Elvis go with the box.” Spike handed the large rectangular box to Dalton. “Make sure it winds up in the middle of the soddin’ Pacific before Elvis starts suckin’ down the crew. He’s a lack-brain but not a complete idiot.”

“Yes, master Spike.”

Buffy watched as the three vampires slipped out of the factory into the night.

***   
[](https://imgur.com/fj7GvwL)

Buffy was describing her dream to Giles and expressing her alarm that elements were starting to happen such as the plate that her mom had broken that morning. “I’m sure Dru must be alive and Angel is in danger, Giles. It must be a Slayer dream.” Buffy was distraught thinking Angel might be at risk.

Giles took off his glasses and took a deep breath. Not for the first time he wished Slayers didn’t come with the full hormonal package that often made dealing with their non-Slaying crisis issues so … difficult. 

“Even if it is a Slayer dream and Dru IS alive, we can still protect Angel,” he rolled his eyes mentally. ‘As if a very old, very dangerous Master Vampire needs protection.’ He took a deep breath and continued trying to console his charge. “Dreams are not prophecies, Buffy. Remember You dreamt the Master had risen but instead you stopped it.” He walked towards his office where his Council books were stored. “Let me read up on Drusilla and see if she has any particular patterns. We’ll meet here at seven to determine a strategy.”

GhostSpike shook his head. “Not gonna find anything helpful ‘bout Dru in your books, Rupes and you know it. Certainly nothin’ ‘bout her bein’ a threat to ole Angel.”

*** 

Buffy was surprised to encounter not her Watcher but Miss Calendar. “Yeah, Giles had to get some other books from his place and wants to meet elsewhere. We can go together.”

As the pair drove towards the waterfront Buffy noted suspicious activity along the docks that had ‘vampire’ written all over it. 

“Oh, hell,” Spike gave a half-smile. ‘’Course she would pop up there to bugger it all up.”

Dalton was loading the box with the Judge’s arm into a truck that was going to be unloaded onto a cargo ship headed for the Orient as Buffy crept up behind him scaring the unlife out of the timid vampire.

“Every time I see you, you’re stealing something! You should talk to somebody about this klepto issue.”

Dalton dropped the box and ran as fast as possible leaving Elvis and the other minion behind to fight for their lives. Soon there were just two piles of dust and Buffy pulling the box from the truck.

“Not how I planned this. I wanted the frickin’ demon part gone not just layin’ about in Sunnydale. Plans always go tits up even when it would help the good guys when the Slayer gets involved.”

*** 

Spike watched as Buffy put the box in the back seat of the teacher’s car then rounded up said teacher to continue on to their planned rendezvous with Giles. So far her seventeenth birthday was turning into a complete pain in the ass.

They got to the Bronze only to find another pair of vampires preying on the clueless clubbers. Buffy quickly dispatched one and chased the other into the club tackling the large demon and rolling before finally staking him.

“Surprise,” yelled Cordy as the group gathered around the scene blocking the view from most of the congregating youth in the club.

Angel shouldered his way towards the now standing Buffy, “Are you okay?”

“What happened?” Giles glanced around looking to see what sort of damage control might be necessary.

“Vamp in alley … one of Dru’s guys I think.” Buffy looked at the group gathered in confusion. She hadn’t expected a full Scoobie meeting, not at the Bronze anyway.

Giles cleared his throat and looked flustered. “A surprise party actually.”

Cordy beamed her thousand-watt smile, “Yeah, happy birthday Buffy!”

Oz was still staring at the pile of dust that had once been a large deformed male. “Did everybody else see a guy turn into dust?”

“Yup,” Xander clapped the boy on the shoulder. “Vampires are real and a lot of them live in Sunnydale.” He nodded his head towards Willow, “Will’ll fill you in.”

Willow looked nervous. She’d invited the new fella to Buffy’s party but hadn’t decided to let him know about their super-secrets, at least not just yet. It was too late to worry now though. “I know this is hard to accept at first…”

Oz merely shook his head. “No, actually it explains a lot.”

Spike had to laugh. “I knew I liked the boy. Sees what’s what and rolls with the punches,” he nodded in approval. “He’ll survive no matter what’s tossed his way.”

Jenny Calendar entered with the box she’d found on her backseat. “What’s this?”

The mystery box revealed an arm, hand attached, that promptly sprang from the box and latched onto Buffy’s neck.

Willow gasped, “What was that?” as she watched Buffy grapple with the flailing arm.

“Looks like an arm,” Oz offered nonchalantly.

They managed to get the hand loose from Buffy’s neck and wrestle the arm back into the container. Angel stared at it in horror. “It can’t be. She wouldn’t!”

Xander looked at the vampire with suspicion. It always seemed that Angel knew a lot more than he shared with the rest of the class. Usually important stuff too. “Care to share?”

“It’s a legend. Older than me. A demon meant to rid the earth of the plague of humanity. It goes back to the early days when humans won the earth from the Old Ones. It’s supposed to separate the righteous from the wicked. It’s called the Judge.” Angel’s monotone sounded like the most boring teacher in the history of the world.

“Good Lord!” Giles paled a bit. “Is it true? Is this he?”

Angel glowered at the box, “Not all of him.”

Giles looked at the box as well. “He cannot be killed. An army went up against him, most died but the survivors dismembered him.”

Angel picked up the narrative, “The pieces were scattered and buried all around the world.”

Jenny shuddered. “So these parts are being brought here?”

“In this case, was tryin’ to get rid of a piece,” GhostSpike shrugged.

“By Dru!” Buffy decided. “The vamps were Spike’s men.”

Angel nodded, “She’s just crazy enough to do it.”

Spike glared at his grandsire, “And who made her that way? Who told her those stories and chuckled about the mayhem putting lego-man together would bring? She wanted the bloody thing assembled as a welcome home to you, you miserable wanker.”

Giles narrowed his eyes as he looked at the box, “We have to get this out of town.”

Miss Calendar glanced at Angel in a calculated manner. “Angel, you’ve got to do it. You’re the only one who can protect this thing.”

Spike smiled seeing her game. “Aha! Good idea. Too bad it didn’t work. Send Captain Forehead away from his teen angel and let the fires cool while he’s gone. Clever lady you have there Watcher.” Spike watched as Buffy looked longingly at Angel. “Too bad Angel had to make his claim on the girl before he left town. Managed to lose the plot entirely then.”

Buffy was pouting a bit. “Why can’t I get rid of this arm thingy?”

Jenny looked at her with sadness, “You can’t slip town for a few months.”

Buffy gasped hearing how long a separation she was suggesting.

“She’s right,” Angel threw out his chest proudly playing hero of the hour. “I have to take this to the remotest region possible.”

Spike watched Miss Calendar hide her smile. She’d known Angel’s pride was his weakness. 

“Yeah, play to the berk’s over-the-top hero image he likes to portray. Off on a quest like a knight of old… not!” Spike watched as Buffy practically swooned at the image.

“I can catch a cargo ship to Asia, maybe take it to Nepal.”

“A landlocked country you dolt,” Spike noted.

Buffy cringed at the thought of all those smoochies being off at sea. She had a vision of Angel being wounded and cared for by some cute Asian girl and never coming back. 

“You know those wacky flying machines are much safer than they used to be,” she suggested. If he’d just fly this body part over and come right back it would only be a couple of days after all.

“I can’t fly,” Angel lowered his head as if in shame. “There’s no sure way to guard against daylight.”

“Hello! Cargo hold? Hell… pull the plastic window cover down on the window and fly coach you Amadan.” Spike shrugged. “How do you think me and Dru got to so many places? Are you really that stupid or just backward.”

Angel turned his puppy eyes on Buffy with deep sadness, “I don’t like this any more than you do Buffy. There’s no other way.”

“Yeah, that’s right… play the martyr crap now. Sing her that song and Buffy will be sure to dance to it. All nobility and self-sacrifice. Plan to run the bases then, don’t ya. Little good-bye nookie? Plant the seed, set the trap and let Buffy run into it thinkin’ it’s her idea.”

“When?” Buffy stepped into the trap.

“Tonight. As soon as possible.”

“Before the girl has time to think better,” Spike added.

“But…” Buffy’s chin wobbled and eyes welled with tears. “But it’s my birthday.”

Spike flinched as he practically heard the trap shut on the girl. 

***   
Angel was giving Buffy longing looks.

‘Like he’s actin’ one of those war films where the hero’s off to battle and lettin’ his girl know she might not see him again. Next scene’s the girl next door givin’ it to her boy, provin’ her love.’ Spike saw the game for what it was. Angel was immortal to all intents and purposes. Waiting even a few years would be nothing for their likes. Angel wasn’t one to put off getting what he wanted though, never had been.

“I should go the rest of the way alone.” Angel reached out a tentative hand towards Buffy. “I’ll be back.”

Buffy looked suitably heartbroken. “When? Six months? A year? Who knows how long it will take or if we’ll even…”

‘Yeah, to a teen even a few weeks can seem like a lifetime.’ Spike’s heart broke for his girl. She had no idea what she was getting into even if it hadn’t led to the plonker losing his soul and destroying everything.

“We’ll ever… what?”

Buffy looked around the docks soberly. “Someone always wants us dead.”

Angel smiled grimly, “We’ll be fine. Yeah, we can’t know, Buffy, nobody can. That’s the deal.”

Spike fumed. “Men have been using that same trap forever. ‘Goin’ off to war. Might not make it back. Sure wish we could be together but fate... ‘ blah, blah, blah. Works every bloody time. All those single mums and babies never see dad again and not always cause they do die in battle either. Just a sure way to part those thighs.” 

“I have something for your birthday,” Angel pulled out a small box and handed it to Buffy. 

Spike was disgusted watching Angel play the game needed to get the birthday prezzie HE wanted out of this night. “Last chance sex.”

“My people … before I was changed… exchanged this as a sign of devotion. It’s a Claddagh ring. The hands represent friendship, the crown is for loyalty and the heart… well,” He put a hand over his unbeating heart and gave her a soulful look. “You know.”

‘Stop the aw shucks bashful boy bit you berk… girl’s all ready to pluck.’

Angel revealed a ring on his finger, a match to the one in the box. “If the heart points to you then it means you belong to somebody… like this.”

Buffy eagerly held out her hand, “Put it on.” Naturally the point was towards herself as well. 

Just as the two started to embrace a pair of vampires along with Dalton raced towards them intent on grabbing the box with the arm and a fight ensued. 

“Dalton! You dope! Just let Angel do out work for us and get rid of it.” Spike felt like banging his head against a wall. “Shoulda made sure he knew what was important was just gettin’ rid of the thing, not who did it.

Buffy fell into the water as she plunged her stake in the last minion, not being able to stop her forward momentum.

Dalton ran off with the box in the confusion.

‘And you had to bring it back to the lair didn’t you,’ Spike rolled his eyes. ‘For bein’ so smart you were not much with the thinkin’ on your feet, old sod.’

“Buffy!” Angel dove in after Buffy and pulled her to the dock.

“I suppose you’ll need to get changed out of those wet clothes,” Jenny sounded as disappointed as Spike felt.

*** 

Buffy told the gang about the brush with Spike’s minions and how the boxed arm was now on its way to Dru.

“The more I learn about this Judge the more urgent stopping his reassembly becomes. His touch can literally burn the humanity out of you. No human has survived. No weapon forged by man can kill him.”

“Guess it’s time to get the donuts. Looks like a long research party,” Xander headed for the door.

*** 

Buffy drooled a bit on the book posing as a pillow much to the horror of her Watcher.

Giles glanced at Angel who had just joined the group in the library. “It seems Buffy needed some rest.”

“Yeah, she hasn’t been sleeping well. You know… tossing and turning.”

He caught the looks that shot his way and the growing suspicion on at least the Watcher’s face. 

 

“She TOLD me. Because of her dreams,” Angel covered. 

“That’s right. Don’t let the kiddies know about your peepin’ Tom act. Watchin’ the girl sleep and tryin’ to pass it off as romantic won’t work with Giles and you know it.” Spike sneered.

“Angel!” Buffy startled awake.

He rushed to her side, “It’s okay, I’m here.”

Buffy quickly related her dream revealing that it wasn’t just Dru they were dealing with but that Spike was also there. 

“Damned dream’s pretty thorough too even to lettin’ her know which abandoned factory.” Spike pondered the power of Slayer dreams for a moment and began to see why his plans never fared well against this Slayer.

“So we have to go scope them out. See how far they’ve gotten in putting Humpty together again and all,” Buffy was finishing her outline of a plan of action.

***   
[](https://imgur.com/uwG3VQu)

Buffy watched as Spike covered his anger and disappointment when Dalton slunk back into the factory complete with box. He tried to hide it but Dru was too quick for him. He cringed as her eyes lit up. ‘Gonna have to think of somethin’ else. Princess’ won’t be denied, not now.’

“Look what I have for you Ducks,”

Dru grinned wickedly, “The best is saved for last,” she clapped her hands in glee then took the box. 

Before Spike could think of a way to delay the inevitable Dru had put the box in its proper place like fitting a jigsaw puzzle piece. The magic began to swirl and all the boxes popped open revealing a living, complete demon. 

Dru smiled widely and kissed Spike, “‘e’s perfect my darling! Just what I wanted.”

Dru’s smile turned sly as she thought about the events set in motion by this. All her favorite pixies said this was an omen that her daddy would be home quickly.

Spike pulled on Dru’s hand and away from the fearsome demon. 

The judge took stumbling, awkward, steps towards the pair his arm raised, “You…”

Spike wheeled himself in front of Dru quickly. “What’s that mate?”

“You two stink of humanity. You share affection. Jealousy…”

“Love,” GhostBuffy nodded. “Yes, they are both still pretty human in a lot of ways even if evil a lot of the time. Lots of vampires seem to be.”

“What of it? “ Spike was belligerent. “Do I have to remind you that we’re the ones that brought you here?” Spike desperately hoped he’d have some control over this beast that his lover had revived.

“I have no alliances.”

“Right then,” Spike huffed. “You want to go back in all those little boxes?” Nothing like a bit of bluster, see if the oaf could be bullied into containment or at least cooperation.

The Judge gave him an icy stare. “You may live. You will help serve my purpose.”

‘Not bloody likely,’ Spike thought. He had a slight reprieve at least. Some breathing room to try to figure out how to put the Genie back in the bottle. 

The Judge began looking around at the assembled vampires in interest. “He pointed to the terrified Dalton. “This one is full of feeling. He reads. Bring him to me.”

Before Dalton could escape the other minions pushed him toward the imposing demon and before Spike could even say a word the gentle vampire with a brilliant but not quick enough mind was left a burned up pile of ash. 

Spike looked at his friend… minion… frienion... in horror as Dru danced and clapped calling for more.

Buffy felt herself cry as she looked at the pile of ash that had once been so engaging. “Poor Dalton, I wish you could have been saved.”

***   
[](https://imgur.com/AidHJYw)

Buffy and Angel had stolen their way into the factory and watched as Dru’s macabre birthday party continued below their place of hiding.

GhostSpike immediately rushed to GhostBuffy’s side. “Oh, pet, I really didn’t want to let this thing lose. You have to believe me!”

“I know,” GhostBuffy reassured him. “Lots of bad luck I guess. I hate that Dalton died.”

GhostSpike blinked in a bit of surprise. He’d already twigged that Buffy was more sympathetic to himself and even Dru but it seemed she truly had come to some interesting new viewpoints. He only wished these meetings let them have time for a nice long chat instead of quick exchanges. He always seemed to think of dozens of things he had wanted to say but ran out of time before thinking of them when she was there.

“Don’t know what Dru was thinkin’ with this.”

“Maybe one of her vision thingies made her know that Angelus would be home soon?”

“Could be. Nothin’ she wouldn’t do to make that happen.”

GhostBuffy put a hand on his arm, “Hey, she loved you… she was just trained to love him more. Nothing lacking with you or how you treated her. She was broken before you were ever turned.”

GhostSpike blinked back a tear. “Yeah, Suppose you’re right. Even with movin’ on it still hurts, ya know?”

 

GhostBuffy looked at her doppelganger standing next to Angel, “Yes, I do. Wounds to the heart never completely heal. I get that.”

“Suppose you’re not lookin’ forward to what comes next, ‘eh?”

GhostBuffy shuddered. “Not in any dimension or dreamworld or whatever. Once was really, really, enough. Besides… who wants to watch themselves do the stupid anyway?”

“Not stupid, pet. He was settin’ you up for a while there.”

“I get that now. I watched him in the past and caught on to his patterns. Still… not my finest hour.”

“Maybe your finest hour’s yet to come?” GhostSpike winked hoping to tease a smile out of her. It worked.

“Guess you’re gonna get a ring-side seat to that disaster,” GhostBuffy bit her lip clearly not liking the idea.

“Only fair, I suspect. Seein’ how you saw me lose MY virginity to the berk,” GhostSpike blurted out before wishing he could stuff the words back into his mouth.

GhostBuffy looked stunned. “Huh, yeah, another thing we have in common.” She thought about all the emotional baggage they both carried and the same source for most of it. “Spike, could you do me a favor and leave the room when it… when we… I just would be so embarrassed knowing you…” She closed her eyes. “I didn’t watch, you know, when I was there with you. I heard everything but I left the room.”

GhostSpike gulped. “Sure, Love. Didn’t fancy watching that show anyway.”

“Well, well... “ Spike looked up at Angel and Buffy having seen where the Judge was looking. “Looks like we have a couple of party crashers, Princess.”

The two ghostly figures realized their time was at an end at the same time. GhostBuffy lunged quickly and gave GhostSpike a quick kiss before he was whisked away. “See you soon. Remember, don’t watch!”

*** 

[](https://imgur.com/fj7GvwL)

“You’re shaking like a leaf,” Angel led the rain soaked Buffy into his dark apartment.

“I’m cold.”

“Let me get you some dry clothes.”

Angel handed Buffy some sweatpants and a shirt. “Put these on and get under the covers.”

“You almost went away today.” Buffy looked ready to sob.

“You did too,” Angel drew her into his arms.

“Should leave now but hate leavin’ her alone.” Spike paced. “Not gonna watch, but poor Bit’s all alone for all of Angel bein’ there. Predator and prey and she don’t even realize it.”

“I feel like… if I lost you… But then you’re right. We can’t be sure about anything.” Buffy cried into Angel’s shoulder.

“Shhhh.” Angel looked down at the willing girl in his arms, “I love you. I tried not to but I can’t stop.”

The soon-to-be-lovers kissed heatedly.

“And that’s my cue to bugger out since I can’t stake the bastard.” Spike fulfilled his promise and stood outside the door as the rain poured down like a soul pouring out of a body.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N  
> I hated killing Dalton but I’m not changing canon (okay, I am adding to it and twisting some, but not changing what we saw on screen at least in these “past” events.). Dalton was a promising character who left the scene too soon who has a fair number of “fans” of his own. To them, I apologize for not saving him.
> 
> Nepal is a landlocked country so that cargo ship would be just the first part of any journey Angel planned. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nepal 
> 
> Short look at Nepal https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vD5PHRwNvvM&feature=youtu.be 
> 
> Tip of the hat to Spike’s “Slow boat to China” reference https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AaPoFMPlSQM&feature=youtu.be
> 
> In honor of Angel’s self-view  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bWcASV2sey0&feature=youtu.be 
> 
> Psychological manipulation https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Psychological_manipulation
> 
> A rather creepy vid about manipulation for sexual ends (or part of this “course”) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iNtRdInCSkk&feature=youtu.be 
> 
> These are interesting too on manipulation   
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Um75Ag2G5nE&feature=youtu.be  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4820Lej-N8o&feature=youtu.be


	63. Chapter 63

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [](https://imgur.com/1QFuD9q)
> 
> ‘Innocence’ written by Joss Whedon and bits of dialogue from the script are used, twisted or touched on in the chapter

Chapter 63

[ ](https://imgur.com/3akTx2g)

 

Buffy wondered if a ghost could blush. She’d kissed Spike… just lunged in and planted one right on his very soft lips! ‘He must think I’ve lost my mind!” Somehow at that moment, she had been so grateful to know that she could trust her fellow traveler to keep his word and not watch her nightmare, her first time with Angel, that she couldn’t have held back if she’d tried. Not that she did… either.

 

‘Funny on some level I’ve always known I could trust Spike at least when he actually gives his word.’ Buffy marveled at that. The Council could say what they wanted about Vampire nature but she’d seen first-hand how different vampires were one from the other. ‘Just like people.’

 

Meanwhile, in this past world already lived, wheelchair-bound Spike was restlessly rolling around trying to get Dru to listen to his pleas that they leave Sunnydale. 

 

“I’m not happy, pet. Angel and the Slayer are still out there. They know where we are and that we’ve got Mr. Lethal Touch all put together. We need to go.”

 

Dru tut-tutted his concerns. Her full concentration seemed to be focused on the door to the factory as if in anticipation. She’d shot a sly glance at GhostBuffy a time or two as if they shared a secret. 

 

“My Angel won’t face the Judge again, not till ‘e’s safe,” She nodded with determination. “Must stay where daddy can find ‘is way ‘ome.”

 

Spike rolled his eyes in exasperation, “Daddy’s not comin’ home, Dru. He might come to stake us but he’s all souled up and definitely not lookin’ on us as family… not that he ever really did.”

 

Dru jerked as if hit by an invisible force and then collapsed to the floor. Buffy could see the girl that was still Miss Edith inside Dru suffering from the vision of Angel coming back without the soul. As quickly as Dru grimaced with terror and pain, her face changed and she grinned widely, demon back in the saddle. The demon was delighted by what she had seen. Daddy!

 

“Dru?”

 

Dru’s voice sounded positively orgasmic, “Angel!” She began to writhe a bit.

 

“Do you see something?”

 

Buffy watched Dru as she conducted her own silent celebration. Like some pagan acolyte dancing for her god in gratitude. “She knows!” Somehow Dru knew the moment Angel’s curse had broken. Knew and rejoiced.

 

‘I never really got how connected they all were. I wonder if Angel had those connections, those feelings too, and why he never said anything about it. He must have known all about Darla and the Master that first year! Why didn’t he just do something about them right away?”

 

Dru was in a state of near rapture and not answering Spike at all. He began to order minions to secure the factory expecting an attack from Angel at any moment.

 

Dru lay on a table staring up. “I’m naming all the stars.”

 

“You can’t see the stars, luv. That’s the ceiling… also… it’s day.” Spike corrected her gently. He felt sadness engulf him once more realizing that he would never be able to cure the deepest sickness plaguing his Princess, the madness that she’d been driven to even before her turning. 

 

Dru giggled like a child. “I can see them. But I’ve named them all the same name and there’s terrible confusion,” she frowned slightly. “I fear there may be a duel.”

 

Buffy blinked. “She’s talking about Angel and Spike. She’s called… named them both her love… yeah, trouble is coming and confusion. Spike’s not up for a duel though.”

 

Spike sat up straight in his chair, “Do you know what happened to Angel?”

 

Like an actor in a bad melodrama, the being in question moved from the shadows and into the spotlight. “Well, he moves to New York and tries to fulfill that Broadway dream. It’s tough sledding but one day when he’s working the chorus line the big star twists her ankle,” Angel swaggered into the room, smarmy smirk planted on his usually blank face.

 

“Angel,” Spike made the name sound like a swear word.

 

“Not quite,” Buffy thought. Then she thought again with her new perspectives in place. “Well, actually, yeah… just has the brakes off now.”

 

He strutted up to Spike, looming over the chair-bound vampire. “Havin’ security issues boy? Still can’t control the minions, they’re gonna wake up sore by the way.”

 

Spike looked up defiantly, “You don’t give up do you?”

 

Angel put a hand over his heart and smirked, “As long as there’s injustice in this world. As long as scum like you roll around,” Angel laughed and gave the wheelchair a little kick. “I’ll be around. Look over your shoulder and I’ll be there.”

 

Spike narrowed his eyes looking beyond Angel. “Yeah? Well, look over your shoulder.”

 

Angel did and saw the fully assembled Judge who had reached out and touched his shoulder. 

 

Angel shuddered and gasped.

 

“Hurt’s don’t it?” Spike snarked in approval.

 

Angel laughed, “Maybe a bit of a tickle.”

 

The Judge drew himself up stiffly, “I cannot burn this one. He is clean. There is no humanity in him.”

 

“Couldn’t have said it better myself,” Angel crowed.

 

Buffy gulped, “There’s the difference right there. Dru and Spike… even Dalton still kept bits but not Angel. Maybe there wasn’t much there to start with.”

 

Dru was delighted. “Angel? Daddy?”

 

“Yeah baby I’m back,” Angel pulled Dru into his arms and began to kiss and grope her like the old days.

 

Spike glared at the two and looked even paler than usual. “It’s really true?”

 

Dru gushed, “You’ve come ‘ome!”

 

Spike frowned, “The soul?”

 

“What can I say. I was going through a phase.”

 

Dru was watching Spike closely. “This is great,” Spike voiced though Buffy saw from his face he was far from delighted. Spike turned his chair so Dru couldn’t see he felt anything other than joy.

 

“Nice fake, but I read you loud and clear. Dru does too. This is your worst nightmare… well yours and mine I guess,” Buffy sympathized.

 

“Everything in my ‘ead is singing,” Dru smiled brightly. “We’re family again. We’ll feed and play…”

 

Spike sucked it up and turned back, a flat mask covering his expressions. “Made me sick watchin’ you as the Slayer’s lapdog.”

 

The jibe got through and Angel grabbed Spike by the throat intending to teach the upstart to mind his betters.

 

“‘Ow did this ‘appen?”

 

Angel dropped Spike back in his chair and laughed, distracted by the memory of just how the curse broke. “You wouldn’t believe me if I told you.” It was delicious knowing that he was free once again AND had managed to destroy Buffy’s innocence. ‘Well started the process anyway. Just the first brush stroke on this masterpiece. I’ll have Buffy as my greatest piece of art yet before I’m done.’

 

“We’re going to destroy the world,” Dru confided. “Do you want to come?:”

 

Spike looked around at his minions and knew he had no support there. He was firmly alone with only his wits to make sure he survived intact.

 

Angel was puffed up in his power clearly ruling the nest. “Really more interested in the Slayer. Give me tonight to work on her. I guarantee by the time you go public she won’t be anything resembling a threat.”

 

Spike’s eyebrows rose, “You really wanna hurt this girl don’t you?” He wasn’t too surprised really. Angelus never did know how to love and for all of his protestations with the soul, Angel didn’t either.

 

“She made me feel human. That’s not the kind of thing you forgive.”

 

Dru giggled, “There’s going to be a river of blood.”

 

Angel swung her around in an arc nearly knocking Spike’s chair. “Just like old times.” He began to fondle Dru right in front of Spike.

 

Buffy looked at Spike with sadness. “You were all alone against them, weren’t you? No backup at all with Dalton gone. Couldn’t come to us, not then. We would have just staked you at that point anyway. At least I had Giles and the gang to give me a bit of support. All you had was loss, and you were still too damaged to fight. Dru kept you weak so you couldn’t challenge him, didn’t she? I wonder if you realize that even now?”

 

*** 

[ ](https://imgur.com/EZk91nC)

 

GhostSpike touched his lips in wonder. ‘She kissed me!’ His mind nearly shut down at the implications. Better to be thinking about that kiss than the scene he’d left the room to avoid as he’d promised he would. ‘Should I dare ask her what that meant?’ Sometimes figuring out his girl was even harder than translating Dru-speak.

 

Spike had waited until Angel had left his apartment before going back into the room where he knew Buffy had been left alone. ‘Hell of a way for a first experience. She loved the Berk and he took what he wanted then left her. Had to gut the girl to wake up alone. Worst feelin’ in the world.’

 

Buffy slept with a slight smile never knowing a nightmare was something she’d wake to instead of experience while sleeping. “Poor lamb has no idea she’s loosed a ravening monster.”

 

*** 

 

Buffy was confused. She thought perhaps Angel hadn’t wanted to disturb her sleep and had gone ahead to talk strategy with the group. ‘He should have kissed me awake. We might have cuddled a bit before facing the whole Judge situation.’

 

She’d dressed and gone to join the gang at the library. “Maybe he’s just feeling a bit awkward since I pushed him into the whole sex thing?”

 

“Aw, love,” Spike felt like crying. “Made you think you started the whole disaster. Make it all your fault once you find out what happened.” He wished he could just hold her for a while knowing she still felt pain over it even after all this time.

 

Buffy walked in on the group as they speculated about the missing Buffy. Willow was wanting to mount a rescue thinking her BFF should have checked in already, Xander in full agreement.

 

Willow’s “Buffy!” was tinged with relief.

 

“We were just going to rescue you,” Xander added.

 

Jenny Calendar noted a slight blush on Buffy’s cheeks, “Where’s Angel?”

 

Buffy frowned in concern, “He didn’t check in with you?”

 

“What happened?” Cordy asked the million-dollar question.

 

Buffy sidestepped that minefield nicely, “The Judge is all back together. He nearly killed us! Angel got us out.”

 

“You didn’t call,” Giles chastised her gently.

 

“We had to hide,” Buffy sputtered. “Then we split up,” she lied uneasily. She wasn’t about to fill-in-the-blanks about what they did in those hours between.

 

Willow looked concerned, “You don’t think Angel would go after the Judge by himself do you?”

 

Spike snorted, “When have you ever seen Angel go after any of Buffy’s enemies on his own? Seen him head into battle without plenty of backup lately?”

 

“No,” Buffy answered immediately then frowned. “I don’t know. I just wish he’d contact me. I need to talk to him.”

 

Her voice wobbled a bit and Jenny gave her a worried look. Something was off about the teacher but Buffy didn’t know quite what.

 

Spike looked at Miss Calendar with disappointment. “The teacher should have told them. She could have saved Buffy the grief at least.”

 

Spike watched Buffy worry over the Great Git until she could take it no longer and cut classes to head back to his apartment.

 

“Poor lass is worried but not about the right things. I’m gonna hate seein’ what he puts her through first hand. Angelus was so proud of himself back then, bragged about his games, gonna be rough. Best Slayer ever and he almost destroyed her like he did Dru and not for lack of tryin’ either.”

 

*** 

 

Buffy did her patrol but only half-heartedly. She was clearly distracted and more looking for Angel than the nasties out and about. 

 

‘Speakin’ of which,’ Spike snarked as Angel popped out from the shadows into her path.

 

“Angel! Oh God, I was so worried,” Buffy rushed to his side clearly eager to embrace him.

 

“I didn’t mean to frighten you,” Angelus lied smoothly. His tone of voice was glib.

 

“Yeah, as proven by the leapin’ out of the shadows act,” Spike snarled.

 

“Where did you go? I was freaking ‘cause you just disappeared.”

 

“Been around, I took off.”

 

“I noticed that but you didn’t say anything… you just left,” Buffy’s voice had a catch to it.

 

“Yeah,” Angelus drawled out the word. “Like I really wanted to stick around after that.”

 

Buffy stopped her forward movement, clearly confused and startled. “After… what do you mean?”

 

Angelus laughed at the vulnerable girl. “You got a lot to learn about men, kid. I guess you proved that last night.”

 

The words hit like a body blow. “What do you mean?” Her voice was as small as she felt at the time.

 

Angelus shrugged as if the night before and the girl in front of him meant nothing of any importance. Buffy read the message clearly even if she couldn’t wrap her mind around why he’d act this way. “I don’t understand?” Her voice was barely there, “Was I not good?”

 

Angelus laughed as if she’d just said the most amusing thing ever and looked her up and down in derision. “Noooo,” his voice was sarcastic. “You were great. Really! I thought you were a pro.”

 

Buffy flinched as if he’d slapped her. “How can you …”

 

Angel shrugged again, “Hey, lighten up. I had a good time, no big deal.”

 

All color drained from Buffy’s face. “It IS a big deal… it’s…”

 

Angel looked down on her and taunted in his most sardonic voice, “What? You expected fireworks? Bells to ring? The earth to move? … Maybe a dulcet choir of little birdies?” He sneered at her naivete. “Come on Buff, it’s not like I’ve never been there before.”

 

Buffy was ready to cry, “I hadn’t.”

 

“I could tell.”

 

Buffy shrugged off his hand and Angelus sighed as if he were much put-upon. “I should have known you wouldn’t be able to handle it.”

 

Buffy was shaking with emotion. “Angel… I love you!”

 

Angelus winked at her. “Love you too,” he answered with a smirk. “I’ll call you… maybe.” then he turned and walked off laughing all the way.

 

Spike was seething. “God that was horrible! Even worse than old William had it or even Dru. Buffy’s insecure already and now he’s planted this poison. No wonder she’s a right mess. Then the college boy did the same thing by makin’ something sacred and pure into a joke her second go. Wonder she doesn’t swear off men altogether. Hell, even at my most evil I wouldn’t do that to her!”

 

*** 

 

Spike watched as Angel tried to lure Willow close enough to kill her only to have Miss Calendar intervene and send Xander for help.

 

Buffy was nearly there but had missed the opening of the act so she didn’t snap to the teacher’s seeming awareness of Angel’s current soulless incarnation.

 

It didn’t take long for Buffy to put the pieces together and save her friends. The fight with Angel was not her best although Spike was happy that she was giving it her best effort.

 

Angel was taunting Buffy with hints of what was to come, “...not the kind of message you tell someone. It sort of involves finding bodies of all your friends.”

 

Buffy looked at him in horror, “This can’t be you.”

 

“Oh, Pet, it’s him to the core. Only thing that curse has done has been to keep him from actin’ on his deepest desires. All on display now though.”

 

Buffy was knocked to the ground as Angel made his escape.

 

In the library, the group of traumatized white-hats stumbled to the realization that Angel was not the friendly soulful vampire they had let into the bosom of their hearts and heart of their lives.

 

Buffy was assuming all blame for the disaster but not giving details. 

 

“Not your doin’ Love. You’re just minutes into seventeen, barely able to be called a young woman at all. Least two adults that hold the true blame, maybe three if you count your Watcher. Gypsy should have warned all of you, Peaches included. Watcher should have been less trusting of an old and famously evil vampire and the biggest villain is Angel himself. Had a hundred years to find out what that curse could and couldn’t do. Plenty of time to make sure that soul stuck. Deep inside he likely kept hopin’ it would go walkies one day. He was twenty-six when he was turned, close to two hundred and a half when he saw you there barely out of nappies and fixated on you. It’s on him most of all.”

 

*** 

[ ](https://imgur.com/3akTx2g)

 

“You should have seen her face,” Angelus laughed in delight. “It was priceless! I’ll never forget it.”

 

“So you didn’t kill her then?” Spike raised a brow but looked a bit relieved.

 

Buffy was pleased to find that hearing Angelus gloat didn’t so much break her heart as it did turn her stomach. She grinned a bit and shook her head at Spike, “You would have though. It would have been a fair fight and clean kill, no games, no torture. You and Angel are very different.”

 

“You don’t want to kill ‘er do you?” Dru smiled wickedly. “You want to ‘urt ‘er just like you ‘urt me.”

 

Angel gave her a sly look. “Nobody knows me like you do, Dru.”

 

“So, you wanted me broken like Dru huh.” Buffy felt slightly dazed. “You almost did it too. Even before this spell I was still trapped in guilt and regret. All that tragic doomed love crap. Every time I started to put it all behind me the guys would feed my insecurity or Giles would give me that look that reminded me about Jenny Calendar’s death and all that guilt. I had just put the nightmare behind me and then hell spit you back at my feet! From then on you just wouldn’t let me move on! 

 

“Even after you left you never left. You showed up, undermining me. I mean what the hell was that on Thanksgiving anyway? You show up behind my back telling everyone BUT me you’re there to save the day against those Indian ghosts. I don’t remember needing your help with that, by the way! Meanwhile, it made the gang think I was too weak and needed you to swoop in and… and what? They all went along with it too, even Giles. Well, Angel, if you really are so necessary to my very survival… why didn’t you stay? Why just come to make me look like a silly girl or bad Slayer, remind me that I couldn’t have you, only to leave?

 

“You certainly didn’t want to be the Slayer yourself. You didn’t do much with patrolling when you were here, you were more of a distraction with all the kissage and deep, brooding looks. 

 

“Seems like your real purpose was to make sure that the wound you gave me by leaving was still open and raw.”

 

Buffy fumed as she thought about how she had still been letting Angel consume her even from a distance. “Who knows how long it might have taken me to get perspective without this hundred-year time-out to see and to think… okay and mature a bit I guess?”

 

Angel had continued his strut and brag while Buffy had railed unheard. “To kill this girl you have to love her.”

 

“Yeah, that might have worked on the girl I was before this grand tour but no longer, Angelus. I’ve got your number now. I see you there wearing the good-guy-souled-Angel mask but I know you’re in there always even if in chains. We have no future… we never did. I don’t even regret it now.” Buffy shuddered. “A life of watching you brood, avoiding anything close to happiness. Your pretentious lifestyle meant to make me feel small and inferior. Me trying to be what you think I should be and not who I am until I would lose myself completely… for once Willow’s magic mistakes have been of the good. I’m cured! I’m free.” 

 

*** 

 

[](https://imgur.com/EZk91nC)

 

Spike watched his girl, utterly crushed, as she sobbed into her pillow. His dead heart felt like it could crumble just watching.

 

“Feel like you want to die don’t you, Pet? Felt that way myself with the first heartbreak. Ran right into Dru and got my wish. Glad you had your duty drivin’ you to keep you from succumbin’” He watched her cry trying to keep the noise down trying not to disturb her sleeping mother.

 

Buffy changed a lot over the years and it all started here. Angel had taken her innocence and Angelus her joy. 

 

Spike hoped that Buffy had a healthier view of all this with the passage of time. “Hell, I can’t remember the name of that bitch who devastated me, ripped my heart out and danced on it. Celia? Claudia? Clementine? Somethin’ with a C I think.” He gave a rueful laugh, “Thought she was my forever love, someone to build a future... everything… with. Now she’s naught but a memory, a faded one at that.”

 

He thought about how Angel still kept a foot in Buffy’s door even after leaving for LA and gave serious thought to taking a trip south to plant a stake in his black heart once the spell ended. “Angel needs to let Buffy put him in the past. Let the girl move on even if it’s not with me… find that happy place again. He won’t though. Hold on to her like a leech just like he did with Dru if Buffy lets him. Yeah, I should rip his oversized head off his bulky shoulders, ‘cept Buffy wouldn’t like that I suppose.”

 

*** 

 

Buffy thrashed in her bed engulfed in a Slayer dream, wrapped in misery. When she woke she had a look of bloody murder in her eye and Spike half hoped that meant she was ready to take down Angelus.

 

Instead of looking for her demented dreamboat though she cornered and manhandled the teacher instead. Whatever she’d dreamed it had led her to realize Miss Calendar knew before that Angel wasn’t stable when it came to that essential soul.

 

“Good,” Spike nodded. “Share the blame. Beat up the Watcher a bit while you’re at it.”

 

Instead, all she managed to do was get the reluctant truth out of the frightened but self-righteous failed guard-cum-teacher. 

 

They headed off to get more answers from Jenny’s uncle only to find one of Angelus’s less tidy pieces of ‘art’ with a blood-written taunt to rub it in. With “Was it good for you too?” he’d managed to underline the idea that Buffy was responsible for this mans’ death and all that would come later.

 

Giles tried to console her but Spike was glad to see that she was more angry than miserable at this point. “He’s just making it easier. I have to kill him.”

 

Spike shuddered. “Just glad he didn’t go for your mum, that woudda destroyed you totally.” He thought about that a bit and knew Angelus’ game plan … start from the outer circle and work his way in. Making the kills harder and harder to take until Buffy stood alone. “Yeah… might just pull your head off anyway and let Buffy yell at me after all.”

 

He was so caught up in visions of making Angel pay for the pain he’d caused this girl that he had missed the conversation and only realized they’d moved to the school again when he noticed Xander proudly handing over a rocket launcher with a promise to teach Buffy how to use it.

 

Spike giggled at the notion. The boy seemed to know his stuff though, something about memories from Halloween. “Good on him though. Quick thinking. Wish I’d been there to see the fireworks!”

 

“I want to check the factory first. See if they’re operational and figure out the rest from there,” Buffy snapped. She was giving orders like a seasoned General.

 

Spike smiled, “Can’t wait to see you, love.”

 

*** 

[ ](https://imgur.com/9CzNluD)

 

Spike watched his wheel-chair bound self hide from the white hats and rushed to GhostBuffy’s side. Remembering those days of helplessness made him shudder, driving all thoughts of that kiss from his mind for the moment. ‘Yeah, more things I don’t want Buffy seein’ comin’ up soon but not this go-round at least. Most she’ll see is me cowerin’ a bit.’

 

GhostBuffy smiled shyly, still a bit embarrassed by the way they had last parted.

 

GhostSpike cleared his throat and stared at the floor. “There’s lots of bad things comin’ up Buffy. Things I’d prefer you never see. Some of my doin,’ some done to me. Hopin’ you’ll do me a favor and not be where you watch when you get wind of any of it.”

 

GhostBuffy hadn’t thought about what it must have been like for Spike when Angelus returned to the fold. She’d guessed that Angel had lots of sex with Dru and likely wasn’t too nice to Spike but based on how Spike looked it might have been a lot worse. It didn’t surprise her but it did hurt her heart… he was yet another victim of the curse being broken. 

 

GhostSpike caught the look on her face and cringed at the thought she was pitying him. “Not wanting any boo-hoo’s from you, Slayer. Big vamp here. Was used to the treatment. Just prefer not to have you watch is all.”

 

“I remember how it was before and can imagine… well, I can now that I know how he is. I don’t have any desire to see him play with you like that. You never deserved it.”

 

“Hey, vampire here… evil remember,” Spike put on his mask.

 

GhostBuffy smiled sweetly, “Not evil,” and chuckled at his affronted look. “Yeah, you’ve DONE plenty of evil but that doesn’t define you.”

 

“Don’t make me into some kind of Woobie, Buffy. I’ve been a first-rate evil monster and we both know it. Never not been proud of it till recently either.” 

 

“Woobie?” GhostBuffy did giggle then.

 

“Some cuddly thing like your stuffies. Like some fluffy toy bear… bears are actually killing machines not to be trusted, not a snuggly. Same with vampires.”

 

GhostBuffy was amused. She could see he was torn between his pride being hurt at the thought that she clearly saw his soft underbelly and his clear yearning to be more than a monster to her. “I know what you are and WHO you are. You’re not a stuffed vampire like on Sesame Street.”

 

Spike had to grin, “Well, I can count though. Not math challenged.”

 

“Remember I’ve been watching you. I’ve seen that you don’t always kill.”

 

“What you’ve seen is a smart predator, not some white hat. Don’t get confused. I kill just fine when I feel like it or need to.” Part of Spike wanted to just shut up and let his girl see his better side but he had a century-plus of a reputation on the line.

 

“Yes, but it was always the fight you liked… the challenge, not the doing evil.”

 

She had him there. “No point killin just to eat. That just makes you an easy target for some little girl with a sharp piece of wood.”

 

“You spared a lot of people, I saw it.”

 

“Only those I took a fancy to. Mostly those who made things of beauty or made the world a bit brighter just bein’ in it,” he grudgingly admitted, after all, Buffy had been watching and apparently paying attention. “I live in this world too and for a lot longer than most people. I like it nice. There’s no payoff in just evil for evil’s sake or for makin’ the world a hell on earth,” he nodded. “Sure, I’m up for a bit of mischief from time to time,” he grinned at a memory. “Liked that bloke friend of Ripper’s… real sense of humor with that one.”

 

“Ethan?!!”

 

“That his name? Yeah, the one made Halloween a real treat.”

 

Buffy smiled, “You would! Anyway, I never really saw you do evil just for the sake of evil. You did your worst when you were trying to please Dru. The point is I know you can and have DONE evil but you aren’t evil. Plenty of people you can say that about too.”

 

GhostSpike blinked. He never would have imagined Buffy would see the subtle distinction when it came to his past deeds. “Can be right annoyin’ too as you recall.”

 

GhostBuffy found his protestations a hoot. “On purpose!” She gave him a serious look, all joking aside. “You wear armor, literally with the leather and punk bit and also with your attitude. You cover all your soft parts, all your hurts. Someone hurts you, you hit back and even with the chip. You use that mouth of yours to slice and dice. 

 

“You’re smart too but can play the brainless twit well. I do that too. We both hide our hearts and our minds from others on purpose. 

 

“You get bored, blow your plans but you think on your feet just like me, too. That’s why when we fight it’s to the draw. We’re so much alike really… yin and yang, light and dark.”

 

Spike looked startled and more than a bit shy. She really seemed to know him well now. He was used to being the one with the insights and it unnerved him a bit. Made it feel vulnerable and unsure of himself. “Well, that … and I never really wanted you dead, Pet. Remember… I like people who make the world brighter and you shine.”

 

GhostBuffy wondered if he could see her blush. Time to turn it back on him. “You also give what you get. If people are kind to you, you usually are kind back to them like with my mom, like your staff back when you were first turned.”

 

He snorted, “You’ve seen too much.” He sighed, no point in obfuscating. “Well, they were good to me. Like family. They took care of me, never mocked me. Had to save ‘em and provide for ‘em. Then again… those Poncy Berks who liked takin’ out their shortcomings on poor William-the-socially-inept, THEY got a spike through the skull.”

 

He wasn’t telling Buffy anything she hadn’t sussed out for herself. That had been her point and he had just confirmed it. “I guess it’s a good thing that I have whatever put the brakes on my actions more than once. I could’ve done something bad with a stake a time or two. That’s something even humans do from time to time and doesn’t come from being a monster… um… you haven’t seen it yet but I tried to kill my sister Slayer in cold blood once.”

 

“Huh?”

 

Before Spike could further this interesting talk they were ripped apart as Buffy and her team set out for the mall.

 

*** 

[](https://imgur.com/EZk91nC)

 

Spike wished he could give Buffy a high five as he watched pieces of the Judge shower the mall. 

 

“Thing of beauty, my girl! Piece of wood or state-of-the-art weaponry, she’s your girl,” he whooped. “Nobody like her.”

 

He watched as Buffy chased Angelus down racing through the mall with single-minded intent. 

 

Finally trapped, Angelus taunted her, “You can’t do it! You can’t kill me.”

 

Sadly, he was right. But to Spike’s glee, she at least left the poofter wishing she had as she leveled a brutal kick to his balls. “Give me time.”

 

*** 

 

Buffy and Giles were solemn. No victory dance for the good guys and while the battle had been won the war was far from over, and the grief.

 

“You must be so disappointed in me,” Buffy nearly whispered. 

 

“I’m not.”

 

“It’s my fault.”

 

“I don’t believe it is. You want me to wag my finger at you and tell you that you acted rashly? You did and I can.” Giles began gently.

 

Before Spike could go into a full rage the Watcher continued. “But I know you loved him and he has proven more than once that he loved you. You couldn’t have known what would happen.”

 

“True,” Spike agreed. “You shouldda looked into it, saved your girl a world of hurt.”

 

“If you’re looking for guilt, Buffy, I’m not your man. All you will have from me is my support and my respect.:

 

“Saved yourself a thorough arse kickin’ with that, Rupert.” Spike concluded. 

 

Buffy’s endlessly sad birthday continued as she put on as neutral a face as possible as Joyce presented her with a cupcake complete with candle. 

 

“Know what I’d wish for you, Pet. Maybe someday, yeah? Make it all up to you if you’ll only let me.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> What happens when you “lose your virginity” (physical information) https://www.healthline.com/health/healthy-sex/what-happens-when-you-lose-your-virginity#statu
> 
> Some interesting articles on the emotional aspects as well
> 
> https://www.bustle.com/articles/99893-14-things-no-one-tells-you-about-losing-your-virginity-because-its-ok-to-laugh Note number 3. Even without losing a soul it can get weird.
> 
> Some pros and cons to consider before making the leap
> 
> https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/affirming-adolescence/201811/the-emotional-pros-and-cons-giving-virginity
> 
> HOW it happens matters
> 
> https://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2013/01/study-how-we-lose-our-virginity-shapes-our-entire-sexual-life/272596/
> 
> About men (other than Angel) and sex
> 
> https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/married-and-still-doing-it/201708/the-truth-about-men-and-sex?page=1
> 
> And a tip of the hat to mathematically gifted vampires. 
> 
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2AoxCkySv34&feature=youtu.be

**Author's Note:**

> Story Notes: Unbeta’d so any and all errors are all mine.  
> Disclaimer: Original show characters and the town of Sunnydale rights remain with Joss Whedon, Mutant Enemy, the writers of the original episodes/books, and the TV and production companies responsible for the original television shows. BUFFY THE VAMPIRE SLAYER ©2002 TwentiethCentury Fox Film Corporation. All Rights Reserved. The Buffy the Vampire Slayer trademark is used without express permission from Fox. ANGEL ©2001 Twentieth Century Fox Film Corporation. All Rights Reserved. The ANGEL trademark is used without express permission from Fox. This is a work of fan fiction and no financial gain is made by this author.  
> In ancient Athens, Eleos was the personification of pity, mercy, clemency, and compassion.  
> There was an altar in Athens dedicated to Eleos, at which “children of Heracles sought refuge from Eurystheus' prosecution. Adrastus also came to this altar after the loss of the battle of Seven Against Thebes, praying that those who died in the battle be buried.  
> "There was in the midst of the city [of Athens] an altar belonging to no god of power; gentle Clementia (Clemency) [Eleos] had there her seat, and the wretched made it sacred".  
> Eleos was known as the goddess of empathy.  
> http://www.theoi.com/Daimon/Eleos.html  
> https://www.biblestudytools.com/lexicons/greek/nas/eleos.html
> 
>  
> 
> A/N: Small bits of dialogue taken or modified from various Btvs and Angel episodes throughout story. Credit will be given in affected chapter notes.


End file.
